Disclaimer – God I'm bored with this…not Joss, not Madonna, not mine!
Rating – If you watched S4 (herein known as season bleurgh!) with all the screwing then you can read this!
Spoilers – The whole B/A arc including Studly Do Right and Captain Cardboard but AU fic
Distribution – You want it…you can have it but LMK please
Feedback – I am an addict…please feed my addiction (sorry whomever I stole that off! It is so good I just had to – forgive me)
Summary – Angel left Buffy to experience a 'normal' life, and for him to also do some growing and resolve that pesky curse thing, but he also said that he would come back for her if she were still free. This is her waiting. Unbetaed and lyrics in *
Dedication – NDK

I know you're coming back, I can feel you. A tingling in my stomach that extends throughout my entire body, coursing through my veins. It's been so long, so much has passed between us. Can we go back? Should we? Or is forward the only way for us now?

*I feel
It's coming*

I've lost track of how long it's been. Minutes turned into hours, then days, then weeks, then months and then years. And in that time I've made mistakes. I've trusted people, used and been used, but nothing canceled out the pain. I have regrets; do you?

*Rain
Feel it on my fingertips
Hear it on my windowpane
Your love's coming down like
Rain
Wash away my sorrow
Take away my pain
Your love's coming down like
Rain*

I think I've grown, I hope I have. I have a capacity for understanding that I never had before. I have accepted who I am, learnt to cope with the hand fate has dealt me. I don't complain about not having the normal. Being away from you has proved to me that I already had that in you.

*When you look into my eyes
And you said goodbye
Could you see my tears
When I turned the other way
Did you hear me say
I'd wait for all the dark clouds
Bursting in a perfect sky
You promised me when you said goodbye
That you'd return when the storm was done
And now I'll wait for the light*

I didn't want you to go that night. I stood across from you, surrounded by the chaos, and my heart screamed at you not to leave me. My head tried to tell me that everything would be ok, but my stubborn heart just tuned it out. The next morning I told Willow that I was just trying to stop from dying, even though I knew you were right.

*Waiting is the hardest thing
It's strange
I feel like I've known you before
I tell myself,
My heart, my soul
When I'm with you
That by sheer force of will
I feel like a magical child
I will raise you from the ground
Everything strange
And without a sound you'll appear
Everything wild
And surrender to me
To love*

Many times I've called out to you; did you hear me? I've heard your cries and I had to fight with myself not to run to you, to take you in my arms and hold you, to tell you everything would be fine. We had to do this on our own; I understand that. I just never knew it would be so hard.

And now you're coming back to me. You're so close that I am sure if I reached out my fingertips would brush against your cool marble skin. Your love crashes over me like waves on rocks. You are coming home to claim me. I am still yours; I am still yours.

*Rain
I feel it
It's coming
Your love's coming down like
Rain*

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