Disclaimer: Joss owns 'em
Riley skipped happily down the park road, singing 'Barbie Girl' out loud. Maybe it was something in the air, but he felt exceptionaly good that night. Like something was going to happen that would be for the better.
In his zoning, he didn't notice the pair of yellow eyes that peeked out from under the bush.
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What was this? Oh, it's that bloke that tried to put a V-chip in my head! Why, I should kill him on the spot! No... pain happens then. Hmm, wonder what the poof's doin' tonight...
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Riley was pulled off the path by strong hands. When he bothered to look up, he met the twisted visage of a vampire. Riley gave out a very 'manly' scream, then began hitting the vampire as hard as he could. Ignoring the commando's weak nudges, the demon carried him away.
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Riley was surprised when he was taken to the mansion on Crawford St. The only tenants to ever live there had long since moved out, so it made the gears in his small mind turn and whirl to try and figure out how the vampires had gotten in.
His captor dragged him up to a side door and pushed him in. The door slammed behind him, making him screech in horror. The next thing he knew, two more vampires had entered through another door. They were both tall, and both sported long leather dusters. That was where the similarities ended. Although one was dark haired, the other bleach-blonde, the commando couldn't tell them apart. His small mind had not evolved beyond cows and hay.
Both vampires mock-bowed and introduced themselves as Angel and Spike. The latter of which pulled a long blade from under his coat. It glistened in the dim light, making Riley yell (scream) in protest. It only provoked laughing from Angel, who seemed pleased in the farm-boy's suffering. Spike chased Riley about the room, poking him with the blade and yelling hog-calls. This only made Angel laugh all the harder.
'Why are they doing this?' The fish wondered. 'Why would anyone want to hurt beautiful me? I'm perfect! I am what girls want in a man. I am the only thing they should want.' Riley didn't know it, but he'd muttered the last two lines out loud, causing both vampires to lean against the wall in fear of rolling on the floor, laughing.
Angel walked up to Riley, a small dagger being tossed between his hands. "Riley, Riley, Riley... You couldn't please a cow."
"That's not true!" He objected in a hight-pitched tone. "Bessy says that I'm the best in the world!"
Angel stared at him for a minute, then sighed, "Y'know, this is just too pathetic to watch. Spike, I'll let you put him out of his misery."
The blonde vampire got a hopeful look on his face, "Really? You mean it, Peaches?" Angel nodded, then took out a small device. Pointing it at Spike's head, it buzzed once. The younger vamp sighed releavingly, "Ahhh... so much better." He let his game-face show. "Now, time to get me some lunch!"
And that was Riley Finn's night out.
Lil' Voices' Note: The author of this story has been cut off from her supply of catnip. The household cat has hid it all from her. Methinks this story is a part of that catnip missage. Or it could have been the spoilers... Ehh, Riley and Buffy, yuck! (Gags)
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