Part Thirteen

Buffy was dressed and sitting on her bed. The phone rang and she answered it.

"Hello?"

"Gee Buff, you look kinda pale, hope you didn't stay in the tub too long." A low throaty voice hissed.

Buffy jumped up, "Who the hell are you?"

"Oh, but that would spoil the surprise. You know, I can see you right at this moment, how does that make you feel?" The voice laughed.

Buffy froze. She gathered her courage and held up her middle finger, spinning around the room.

"Oh, that's not nice. My, what manners we have."

"Fuck you." Buffy breathed and hung up the phone.

Buffy ran through the house, locking every door and window. The phone kept ringing and Buffy told Dawn not to answer it. Dawn thought nothing of it and went to bed.

*

Sleep didn't come that night for Buffy. All night she kept hearing sounds and ended going to the kitchen and grabbing a steak knife and keeping it under the pillow. Night moved slowly and morning finally came. She was dead tired but every time she closed her eyes she could see murky water hazing her vision. Buffy dressed in a pair of flare jeans and a dark blue sweatshirt. She put her hair in a messy bun and didn't even bother with makeup. She walked downstairs and ate a pop tart. She checked out the front window, as if looking for a time bomb. There was nothing. Buffy opened the door and found a small envelope and opened it.

'Locked doors won't help for long. You have to leave the house sometime and I WILL finish what I started.'

Buffy's hands made the letter flutter. Her breathing hitched and was shallow. Buffy crumpled the letter and threw it in the yard. She blindly made her way to the bench and sat in it. She had to calm herself down. This way she was vulnerable, and she couldn't afford that. Not now.

*

Angel drove down Buffy's street. It had been less than 12 hours since he had last seen her, but he missed her already. She made his heart race and he wanted to stand up and shout to the whole town about how he felt.

He loved her.

It was the honest to God truth. He loved her and he was never going to let her go. Never going to take her for granted. All he was going to do is love her. Angel pulled up in front of her house and saw her sitting on the porch. Angel got out and walked to her with a smile on his face. She looked up and the somber look on her face disappeared and was replaced by a smile. She stood up and wrapped her hands around his neck, while he held her waist. Their lips met in a sweet kiss.

"Hmm, Listerine." Buffy noted.

Angel chuckled and walked her to the car. The drive was filled in a comfortable silence. Both holding each others hand.

They arrived at school and Buffy rushed off to the girls with a kiss to Angel.

"Did you…" Willow stated.

"Just kiss Angel?" Cordelia finished.

"Yeah, that's not important." Buffy said, then went on, "I think whoever killed my Mom is after me."

"What?!" all three girls exploded.

"Yeah, I've been getting calls, letters, and someone was in the bathroom. They tried to drown me." Buffy explained.

Faith's mouth opened and closed as if she wanted to say something.

"I don't know what to do, but you can't tell Angel." Buffy pleaded with them.

"Can't tell me what?" Angel asked wrapping his arms around her waits from behind.

"Uh…" Buffy was at loose for words.

//Shit.//

"What is it?" Angel asked, worried from all the looks on the girls faces.

"Um, lets go over here." Buffy whispered, pulling him over to a secluded corner.

"Someone was in my house last night." Buffy started, looking down.

"And…?" Angel asked, knowing there was more.

"And…whoever it was tried to kill me." Buffy said slowly, not meeting his eyes.

Angel was silent and Buffy looked up after a moment.

His eyes were darkened in anger and concern.

"Angel…?" Buffy asked.

She looked up slowly and looked at Angel. His face was tight and his eyes were full of swirl of emotions. His gaze flickered over her features.

"You're pale." Was all he said.

Buffy nodded, not knowing what to do.

"Why didn't you call me?" Angel asked in a tight voice.

"I-I don't know… It wasn't that big of a deal…?" Buffy tried.

"Not a big deal? Buffy, you said someone tried to kill you! I think that rates pretty high on the 'big deal' chart'!" Angel exploded in anger. Buffy knew that the anger wasn't directed to her, but it felt like it.

"I'm sorry! I was scared, calling someone wasn't really high on my things-to-do-to-stay-alive list!" Buffy snapped back.

Angel was quiet. He looked at her and saw fear in her eyes. Her face was blank, as to not show any emotions, but her eyes did not lie. He could read them like a book. He pulled her into a tight embrace. She started to tremble .

"I couldn't move… The water, I couldn't breathe…" Buffy whimpered, wrapping her hands around his neck.

Inside, Angel's heart tore apart listening to her. She should never be scared. Never, and yet, here she was, on the verge of tears. Angel's response was to hold her tighter. While she was in his arms, he could protect her. Images of her laying in the water, pale, cold, and dead flashed through his mind The bell rang and Buffy pulled away, slowly.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to upset you." Buffy whispered.

"Its not your fault. I just couldn't bear it if anything happened to you." Angel said, taking her hand and leading the way to her class. He walked her in and she sat next to Faith.

"Watch her." He said to Faith, then going over to Buffy and kissed her cheek, "I'll meet you and walk you to your next class." He whispered, kissed her once more, and then rushed out.

Some of the girls in the class glared at her enviously. Buffy just turned away, smiling from the sweet moment. Faith smirked at her.

"Angel told me to keep an eye on you." Faith said.

"Yeah, he's freaked out." Buffy said.

The teacher cam in then and they had to be quiet. Buffy felt the tingly feeling on the back of her neck that she was being watched… But by who?

*

A month went by slowly. No more attacks were made against Buffy. Angel and Spike had made sure every lock in The Summers house was new and working. Buffy had caught up with all her school work and was now in the process of working her way up to her rightful grade. Buffy and Angel were approaching their one month anniversary and Angel wanted everything to be perfect. He had ordered her a ring and was now picking it up.

"Angel, that's beautiful."

"You think so?" Angel asked, looking at her worriedly.

"Yeah, it makes me wonder why my boyfriend doesn't get me nice things!" Faith exclaimed, poking Spike in the chest.

"Dammit, Peaches! You're making me look bad!" Spike yelled.

Angel just laughed and inspected the ring, before slipping it in his pocket . The three of them walked out and into Angel's car.

"Blonde will love it, stop fretting." Spike scowled as Angel started the car.

"What's the plans for tomorrow?" Faith asked.

"Dinner, movie, give her the ring, some time alone. Not precisely in that order." Angel said shortly.

"Some time alone, huh?" Spike asked, wagging his eyebrows.

"Spike, shut up!" Faith yelled, hitting his chest.

She dragged Spike out of the car and leaned into Angel's window, "When you call B., tell her I'll be calling later."

She said, then She and Spike went inside. Angel went back to his house and began to make plans and reservations for tomorrow night.

*

Buffy didn't go to school that day, she hadn't been feeling her best. S he was still edgy in her house and wished she *had* gone to school. No one else had tried to kill her, but she still got harassing calls and letters. She never told anyone except Faith. Angel would flip. Buffy was taking a shower when she swore she could smell the musty scent of gunpowder. Her mind involuntarily went back to that day.

//She jumped up from the lawn chair and ran into the house in time to see her mother fall to the ground.

"Mommy!"

She screamed, seeing the growing red stain on her white cotton shirt.

"No!"

"What the hell?"

A gruff voice growled, and Buffy looked up to see a man in a black mask standing before her, gun in shaking hands.

"Oh my God!" Buffy hissed in a shrill voice. She could see wisps of dark mousy brown hair sticking out from the hat. I was clearly a wig. The blue eyes burned with fear and madness. They looked so familiar, but who?

"What did you do?!" Buffy screamed seeing her mother on the floor again.

"Shut up!" The man yelled.

"You killed her! Murderer!" Buffy screamed, her voice tearing.

He pointed the gun at her, but Buffy didn't see it. Her eyes saw nothing except the bastard that shot her Mom. Buffy advanced on him and heard a deafening boom. She froze and hot pain burned at her belly with a fiery stinging to it.

"No…" Buffy whimpered.

"Oh shit…" The man hissed. Buffy reached for the mask as she fell and saw the face of her killer. It was…//

"Angel?"

Part Fourteen

"Angel?" Buffy whimpered, sliding down the wet tile in the bathroom.

"No… No!" Buffy whispered.

He was the one who shot her, or so it looked like.

//She pulled the mask off as she fell and a small gasp escaped her mouth. It looked like Angel. The brown hair… Her vision was slightly blurred and darkened, but she swore it was Angel…

'But he doesn't have blue eyes…'

Buffy thought fuzzily as she felt the blood draining from her middle. But, the eyes looked brown now…

"Angel?" Buffy whispered.

He jumped and looked a her, then ran out the door.//

"No!" Buffy cried.

It couldn't be, could it? It couldn't have been Angel who shot her, it couldn't. But she could have sworn it was him. But what about the blue eyes? Maybe she had just imagined it?

Buffy got up on shaky legs and turned off the water. Her insides felt numb. There was something wrong. It couldn't be Angel, it couldn't be the man she loved. Buffy was shaking now. From the cold air and her feelings. She couldn't believe this. She could not believe that Angel would shoot her and her Mother. He had never hurt her. Never. Buffy pulled the robe over her and her eyes filled with tears. There had to be more to this, there had to be. Buffy sighed and her shoulders slumped, silently giving in. Something didn't seem quite right, but what else was she to do?

*

Angel arrived at Buffy's door. She had called him over and she had sounded sad. He knocked on the door and she answered it, silently letting him in. He saw by the look on her face she had been crying. Red eyes and puffy cheeks. He moved to embrace her.

"Buffy, what is it?" Angel asked when she moved away from him.

"I have to talk to you." She murmured in a dead voice.

She silently moved to the recliner and curled up in it, as if to shield herself. Angel sat on the loveseat.

"Buffy, you're scaring me, sweetie, what is it?" Angel asked, hating the look of emptiness on her eyes.

Buffy almost broke down at the concern in his voice.

"I remembered who shot my Mother and I." Buffy started, avoiding his eyes.

"You did, who?" Angel asked, hope in his voice.

Buffy suddenly had trouble breathing, "It was you." She whispered.

Angel froze. Did he really just hear that?

"Excuse me?" Angel asked in a tight voice.

"I-I saw you…. Standing over me…" Buffy gasped between breaths.

Angel was silent. His eyes hard and full of betrayal.

"And, do you believe that it was me?" He asked in a cold voice.

"I don't know what to believe anyone." Buffy said in a shaky voice, still having difficulty breathing.

"Bu, you do. You think it was me." Angel hissed.

The he laughed. A horrible sound. It was hollow and full of contempt.

"I thought I loved you. You know that? I actually thought I loved you." Angel murmured in a broken voice.

"Angel, I…" Buffy started.

"Was it good for you too? Lying to me? Making me love you? Making me fall for you?!" Angel exploded.

"No, Angel, I loved you…" Buffy cried.

"Past tense, Buff. Think I wouldn't notice?" Angel sneered, then his face changed, his emotions breaking him down.

"How could you ever think I would ever hurt you? Let alone shot you and your Mother? I thought you knew me. Hell, I thought I knew you!" He laughed that broken laugh.

"Angel-" She was cut off.

"No, no more! I won't listen to another word you say!" Angel yelled as he got up and left slamming the door. Buffy could hear the tires squealing as he sped away. Away from her. Realizing what had happened, Buffy broke down. Her sobs were loud and heart broken. She couldn't breathe. Her whole life was falling apart and there was nothing she could do about it.

*

The next week was torture. Angel didn't talk or say snide things to her, no what he did was worse. He avoided her altogether. When they passed in the halls, he looked above her. When she tried to talk, he would walk away as if she was never there.

"Angel, man. You're killin' 'er." Spike said as they watched Buffy wa lk across the cafeteria, and out the door to eat alone in the quad.

"I don't care anymore." Angel said.

"You're shittin' me you bloke. Yes you do bloody care. I can see it." S pike scoffed.

"No, I don't. She thinks I did it." Angel grumbled.

"No she doesn't. Has she turned you in to the cops? Hell no. She's been trying to talk to you." Spike said.

"So?" Angel asked.

"God, were you dropped as a child? She loves you for cryin' out loud. If you keep this up, once you realize how bloody stupid you're being, it'll be too late to get 'er back. Broads like her only come once in a blue fuckin' moon, mate. You ditch her now and you'll never get her back." Spike advised his stupid friend.

Angel thought about this. It put fear in him to see her move on to another. But she hadn't, yet. But, in time, he knew she would. Buffy would only wait so long, and when she had had enough, she would move on with or without him. Angel walked off and went out into the quad, looking for her. He didn't see her anywhere.

"Angel." A voice purred, caressing his arm.

Angel looked down and sighed. It was Darla. He plucked her arm off of him and turned.

"An-n-n-ng-e-e-e-l!" She whined.

Angel shook his head and entered the school, once again looking for his ex.

*

Buffy had gone home. She couldn't take it anymore. Everyone looked at her if she was something to be sorry for. They avoided her like the plague. She sat on the couch and engrossed herself in soap operas. It wasn't long before the doorbell rang. Buffy reluctantly got up and answered it. It was the one person she did not see.

Riley.

"What are you doing here?" She snapped.

He pushed through the door anxiously. He was wearing a black cap and his eyes were wild and wary.

"What do you want?" Buffy asked, closing the door.

"I-I-I finally figured it out." He stuttered, looking around.

"What are you talking about?" Buffy asked.

"I was going about this all wrong." Riley went on.

"What?" Buffy shook her head.

Riley paced, stumbling over his feet. He pulled out a pill box and took a swig, swallowing at least half a dozen pills.

"What is that?" Buffy yelled.

"I did it wrong. I wasn't supposed to be me." He babbled.

He pulled off his cap and revealed poorly dyed brown locks.

"I-I-I have to be him." Riley babbled, grabbing her arm.

"Don't you see? I'm him now. I'm Angel." Riley said.

Buffy just stared in horror as de ja vue unfolded in her mind. The killer hadn't been Angel, no it had been Riley as Angel. Buffy pulled away sharply, "What's wrong with you, Riley?"

"NO!" He screamed, whipping his head to look at her with crazy eyes, "Not Riley! I can't be Riley, YOU DON'T LOVE RILEY!"

Buffy pursed her lips. He was insane.

"I have to be him, you love him." Riley whispered.

The phone rang and Buffy glanced at it. Riley glared at her and pushed her to the phone, pressed something cold in her back.

//A gun…//

"Answer the phone." He hissed at her.

"Hello?" Buffy answered.

"Buffy?" A voice asked. It was Angel.

"Hi…Dawn." Buffy faked.

"Dawn? Buffy, what's going on?" Angel asked, confused.

"Nothing, nothing's wrong. What did you want, *Dawn*?" Buffy asked, stressing her sisters name so her ex would get the point.

"What…? Who's there with you?" Angel asked, finally getting it.

"A friend. A guy. Not Angel, because he dumped me. New meat. Tall, blond… You'd *love* him, Dawn." Buffy said, secretly decoding her words.

"Blond…, Riley?" Angel asked.

"Yeah." Buffy answered.

The gun was pressed harder into her.

"Hang it up." Riley hissed.

"I gotta go, Dawn." Buffy said.

"Is he hurting you?" Angel asked, concern and anger etching his voice.

"Not at the moment." Buffy answered, keeping her voice light.

"I'll be there soon." Angel said.

"I love you…Dawn." Buffy sort of blurted out.

"I love you too, Buffy. Please, be careful." Angel whispered into the phone .

Buffy nodded, knowing he couldn't see her and hung up.

"What'd she want?" Riley asked.

"To sleep over at a friends." Buffy bluffed.

"Good, won't get our way of what we have planned." Riley hissed, then grabbed his head.

"Ahh!" He cried out, grabbing the pill case out of his pocket and taking more.

"Are those steroids?" Buffy hissed.

"They make me feel good, try some." Riley ordered, trying to give her some.

"No! Are you crazy?!" Buffy shrieked.

"No, not crazy, in love. Buffy, I love you. But, I know you can't love me, because you love him." Riley hissed, his eyes darkening.

"Who?" Buffy asked.

"Liam. I know it. You can't hide it from me. But, soon that will all change. He'll be gone and I'll be here. It'll just be you and me. Forever."

His words chilled her to the bone.

"You killed my mother." Buffy whispered.

"Not my fault. The stupid whore got in the way!" Riley shouted.

"Don't call her that!" Buffy screamed.

Riley pointed the gun at her.

"Shut up!" Riley snapped.

"She got in the way! I was just supposed to scare her! Maybe hurt her a little, not kill her! I panicked!" Riley exclaimed.

"Why did you shoot her?" Buffy asked, silent tears running down her cheeks.

"I was just supposed to scare her. To scare you." Riley said, his eyes cold .

"Why?" Buffy chocked out.

"So you would come back to me, so I could hold you and make it better!" Riley yelled.

"You shot my Mom because you wanted me to cry in your arms?! You sick bastard!" Buffy shrill scream echoed.

She lunged and tackled him. One shot rang out and Buffy froze.

For one horrifying moment, she was thrown back in time.

//She jumped up from the lawn chair and ran into the house in time to see her mother fall to the ground.

"Mommy!"

She screamed, seeing the growing red stain on her white cotton shirt.

"No!"

"What the hell?"

A gruff voice growled, and Buffy looked up to see a man in a black mask standing before her, gun in shaking hands.

"Oh my God!" Buffy hissed in a shrill voice.

She could see wisps of dark mousy brown hair sticking out from the hat. I was clearly a wig. The blue eyes burned with fear and madness. They looked so familiar, but who?

"What did you do?!" Buffy screamed seeing her mother on the floor again.

"Shut up!" The man yelled.

"You killed her! Murderer!" Buffy screamed, her voice tearing.

He pointed the gun at her, but Buffy didn't see it. Her eyes saw nothing except the bastard that shot her Mom. Buffy advanced on him and heard a deafening boom. She froze and hot pain burned at her belly with a fiery stinging to it.

"No…" Buffy whimpered.

"Oh shit…" The man hissed. Buffy reached for the mask as she fell and saw the face of her killer. It was Riley.//

Buffy scrambled up in a panic. She thought she had been shot, but she hadn't.

"You little bitch!" Riley hissed., coming up to her and smacking her.

"Don't you fucking touch her again." Angel hissed as he came up to the once blond boy and punched him.

Buffy watched as they fought, before Riley grabbed his gun again. He pointed the gun at Buffy's head. He squeezed the trigger.

"No!" Angel screamed, pulling at his hand at the last moment. The path of the bullet shifted and it imbedded itself in her stomach. Again.

Buffy eyes grew wide and she peered down at the wound. Dark, crimson blood poured out of her belly with amazing speed. But, she felt no pain. Just felt herself growing tired.

"Buffy!" Angel yelled and tried to get to her.

The gun went off again and Angel went down. Buffy saw his own blood staining the carpet.

//But, that will stain… What will Mommy do?//

Buffy fell to her knees and everything seemed agonizing slow. Angel had somehow made it to his feet, throwing himself at Riley, his right arm hanging there bloody.

The gun was thrown near Buffy and she reached for it.

//Shiny…like a toy…//

Buffy's mind wasn't working properly. She held it in her loose grip. An gel was thrown to the floor and he lay there in pain. Buffy's vision clouded and Riley hovered above her, smirking. Through the haze that was now her mind, she knew she had two options. Kill or be killed.

Part Fifteen

Hospitals were depressing. The blank white walls. The sterile smell. The moans and groans of people in pain. The silence of wounded people. Angel walked carefully into the room. She lay there peacefully, in the same position as she had always been in. It didn't even look like she had even left this horrible place. Angel sat in the chair by her bed and took her hand. It was cold and bone white. Her fingers lay limp within his own.

"Buffy…" He chocked out in a gasp.

His chest wanted to heave. To let out all the sobs that lay buried within. But, he couldn't. Not now. Not until she was awake and she could tell him everything would be alright. That she loved him. That she would never leave him. But, now, she was sleeping. Deep sleep. Just like before.

"Oh, Buffy…" Angel whispered, kissing her soft hand.

His simple whisper seemed to echo through the silent room. So silent except for the steady beeping of Buffy's monitor.

"Buffy, you have to wake up…" Angel whispered, his voice becoming hoarse.

She didn't stir. She couldn't hear him. But, he had to try.

"I don't want this without you. This life. Riley should have killed me. If you're going to sleep for the rest of forever, than I should have fared no better. Why couldn't it be me? Why you? Why are you always the one to suffer the consequences…? I need you to wake up. There's so much you have to see, to do… College, you wanted to go to college. And, us. There's so much that we have to plan. I-I want to make love to you. I want to propose to you. I want to marry you. God, I want to put my children in you. God…" That's when Angel broke down. Sobs wracked his large frame. His shoulders heaving with gaps as he leaned over and held onto his love's hand tight.

Everything that seemed like the future was slipping away each moment she slept longer.

Someone had witnessed this exchange. Someone who had a lot to think about.

*

Angel finally left her room. It had been 97 hours since she had fallen into a coma. He needed a break, and some food. He was in the cafeteria getting a sandwich when someone came up behind him. Angel turned quickly and winced. The stitches on his shoulder had stretched. It was Buffy's father behind him.

"Liam." Hank said.

"Mr. Summers." Angel greeted as they sat down.

"I heard you with my daughter." Hank sighed, looking older than his 39 years.

"You did." It wasn't a question, more a statement.

"Yes. All those things. I know she loves you. I may not be around as much as I should, but I saw that looking her eyes every time she mentioned you. Joyce used to have that same look. Before…" Hank trailed off.

"I'm sorry." Angel said softly as the older man mourned his dead wife.

"Ye, well, I regret not spending enough time with Buffy. But, it hurt. She's o much like her mother. Now…now I may not the chance to tell her that." Hank sighed, rubbing his face with his palms.

"Why do you say that?" Angel asked.

"I don't know… She's strong. No doubt about that. She's put all with all this shit thrown at her. I know you love my daughter." Hank said.

"Yes, I do."

"I just want you to know, you have my blessing. If you want to marry her and take her away from this awful place, you have my blessing." Hank said, the got up, "Excuse me."

Angel nodded numbly and also got up. He walked himself back to Buffy's room and watched her from the doorway. She looked so peaceful. Just like a year ago. Only, she was paler and she had an air mask on. Angel walked into the room and resumed his place in the chair, beside her. Always beside her.

*

It was all dark. This void of blackness engulfed her. But, she was used to it. Sometimes, a pinprick of light would be in her sight and she could hear muffled voices. But, she could never reach it. Something was keeping her, but what? She searched her clouded mind for something, anything to let her know what had happened. She remembered a gun. A gun, Angel, and Riley.

Riley.

His name triggered a handful of memories.

//You are hiding something, aren't you?!//

//What do you know?!//

//You little bitch!//

//I was just supposed to scare her. To scare you.//

// I panicked.//

She remembered things, but what was important was left to be unseen. She was scared. Scared to know what had happened, what had been done. But, now was the time to get over insecurities and face reality. Buffy willed herself to see that pinprick of light and then walked into it. Waking up.

*

8 Days later

It had been 12 days, almost two weeks since the incident. The Sunnydale media were going crazy about the story and wanted comments from Angel and pictures of the catatonic girl. Angel had fallen asleep for the time being, he had stayed in her room almost the entire time. Leaving when others wanted to see her, but never going far. Hope of her waking up had diminished a little. He may have been sleeping, but it was a mere doze. So, he could be awoken quickly. At first, he thought he was still dreaming when he felt little twitches coming from under his hand. It kept going on, so Angel opened his eyes and looked around, in a bit of a daze. He looked down and saw that Buffy was the one moving. Her eyes moved rapidly under closed lids and her fingers twitched.

"Buffy." He called softly, new hope rising within him.

She moaned, "No…"

Angel was to his feet in a beta and in search of a Doctor. When he came back, Buffy had quite moving. Her eyes were squinted and hazy hazel orbs peered out.

"Buffy…? Angel asked, his voice betraying the hope he felt.

"Who…?" She whispered, and her eyes drooped.

"Buffy, its me." Angel whispered, taking her hand.

She swallowed and struggled to get the air mask off. Her hands were shaking and she seemed in a near panic.

"Buffy?" Angel asked, worried.

The doctors then came and pushed Angel out while they did tests. They were out a half hour later, with news.

"She seems to be doing fine. She's a bit disoriented and tired. But, other than that, she's fine."

"What about her stomach wound?" Hank asked.

"Its healing, slowly, but surly. As we told you before, it hit scar tissue and didn't cause as much as an injury as what could have happened. She seemed to be a bit alarmed, but we gave her a mild sedative to calm her down." The Doctor said.

"Can we see her?" Angel asked.

"Yes, but, please, don't rile her up."

Angel more or less ran back to her side, where she was staring out the window blankly.

"Buffy?" He asked in a near whisper.

She looked over at him and gave a tired smile, "Hi."

"How are you?" He asked.

She shrugged, and shifted her eyes back to the window.

"Are you alright?" Angel asked.

Again, she shrugged.

Angel began to talk. About random things, stupid things even. Just to fill the silence.

"Can you go?" Buffy asked, turning toward him an looking at him with haunted eyes.

Angel looked hurt.

"I'm tired." Buffy lied.

She had to get him out. Everything was so disorienting and she couldn't think straight.

What had happened? Riley had shot her, she knew that much. But, what had happened to Riley? Was he still alive? Did she do anything? And…did she want to know?

Part Sixteen

Buffy had told the nurse that she wanted no visitors until she said so. The nurse looked at her strangely, but agreed and gave her two large pain pills to take. Buffy faked swallowing them and hid them under her tongue. When the nurse left, Buffy spit them out and hid it under her pillow. She felt the burning pain in her belly, but chose to ignore it. She willed herself to remember what had happened. She had to know. She had too.

//Kill or be killed. Kill or be killed. KILL OR BE KILLED! Buffy's mind was screaming at her and echoing in her head. Riley's face covered her vision and he smiling wickedly as he dug his hands into her burning belly.

"Ahhh!" Buffy screamed in pain.

She heard Angel groan.

Buffy held the gun firmly and pointed it at Riley.

"You can't kill me. Not now, not when you're dying. What's the point?" Riley sneered, reaching for the gun.

Buffy managed to whip her arms away and hit Riley in the nose. It broke and blood spurted.

"Ah! You fucking bitch!" He screamed in pain.

He tried to hit her, but missed. Buffy's finger squeezed on the trigger. The gun went off with a deafening blast. She blankly heard Angel scream her name, but she was focused on the man in front of her. His eyes went wide a s the bullet tore through the skin of his chest. Blood flew over her and so me dripped into her eyes, coating everything a sickly crimson color. Riley's eyes were wide as he looked at his fatal wound. His mouth opened and closed, but no sound came out. His eyes rolled back slightly and he gave a slight smirk as he fell on top of her. His deadweight pressed on her wound and pain overtook her. His body pressed down on her and was suffocating her. But, she didn't have the strength to move him or even care.

//I wonder what heaven's like?//

Was her last coherent thought before she surrendered to the blissful darkness. //

Buffy opened her eyes and tears of shock filled her eyes. She was a killer. Just as bad as Riley. Buffy tried to sit up and gasped sharply as hot pain shot through her. She was desperately wishing she took the pain pills. But , it wouldn't kill her, right? She was strong enough. Besides, she deserved the pain. She killed a person. Riley should be in jail, paying for what he did. Not being in the blissfulness of death. But, it was her fault. She put him there. She made him get out of his debt. She have him the sanctuary of death. Her fault.

*

Angel walked quietly into Buffy's room and watched her. She was sleeping, restlessly. Her face was contorted and her kept moving. Angel knew she was in pain. He looked at her face, then noticed something out of the corner of his eye. He leaned closer and saw pills tucked under her pillow. She hadn't been her medication. No wonder she was in pain. What the hell was she doing? Angel watched as her eyes fluttered open and she groggily blinked them.

"Buffy." Angel said flatly.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, turning over and wincing, her eyes squeezed shut in pain.

"Why aren't you taking your pills?" Angel asked, bluntly.

"What?" Buffy asked, rubbing her eyes.

"You heard me." Angel said, he was pissed.

"I only didn't take a few." Buffy protested.

"You're in pain." Angel stated.

"No shit, Sherlock, how'd ya figure it out?" Buffy asked sarcastically.

"What is going on?" Angel asked, taking her hands.

"Nothing." Buffy answered.

"Bullshit. Don't lie to me, Buffy, I can see right through it." Angel snapped at her.

Buffy glared at him, "Get out."

"No. I'm not leaving you like this. What's going on?" Angel pressed.

"What part of nothing don't you understand?" Buffy snapped, the pain was making her irritable.

"Tell me what's wrong or I'll tell the nurse you haven't been taking your medication." Angel threatened.

"Go ahead. Do you think I care?" Buffy asked.

Angel started out and Buffy watched him leave. She didn't want to be so mean to him, but he wouldn't leave her alone. She needed time to figure things out.

The nurse came hurrying in with a needle.

"He said you were in pain, are the pills not enough?" She asked, rubbing Buffy's arm with alcohol. She didn't wait for an answer and plunged the needle in. Buffy could help a squeak of pain the escaped her lips. She hated needles.

"Thanks." Buffy grumbled as she pulled the needle out.

"You have to tell us when you're in pain. Pain takes away your strength, you need strength to heal."

Buffy nodded woozily as the drug took its affect.

"Buffy, I love you." Angel murmured taking her hand and kissing it.

Buffy nodded sleepily.

"I'll be here when you wake up." Was the last thing she heard before slipping unconscious.

*

"How is she?" Hank asked Angel as he stepped into the room.

"Sleeping." Angel whispered.

"Good, good." Hank whispered, stepping over to his daughter and brushing the hair off her forehead.

"I called her Aunt Jamie." Hank started.

Angel nodded and waited for him to go on.

"When she gets well enough, I'm taking her and Dawn up there, to New York. Buffy can retake her junior year there. I don't think this is a safe place anymore. She needs a fresh start. Too many memories here." Hank said, gazing at his lovely daughter.

Angel nodded mutely. She would be leaving him.

"Dawn has already agreed. It would be good to get them out of here." Hank said, turning to Angel.

"Yes, it would." Angel replied.

"So, you're just shipping me off, don't I get any say?" A new voice asked.

Both looked down and saw Buffy with her eyes open, looking up at them accusingly

"Buffy, you know it would be for the best." Hank cut in.

To their surprise, she nodded.

"What I meant was, you should ask." Buffy said, turning on her side, "When are we going?"

"Whenever the doctor sees fit to let you out. You can come back for vacations and such, but you can get a new start up there." Hank said.

Buffy nodded again, "Yeah."

It was silent and then Hank had to leave because he didn't like leaving Dawn alone too long now.

Angel gazed at Buffy who stared blankly at the wall.

"I killed him." She whispered.

Angel took her hand and squeezed it.

"Self defense." Angel murmured.

"I know. But… I killed him. I actually murdered someone. I'm as bad as him."

"No, no. You are nothing like him. You're kind, loving, caring, wonderful , beautiful…" Angel said, kissing a different part of her face until he reached her lips.

"I'm sorry." Buffy whispered.

"For what?" Angel asked.

"Being a bitch." Buffy answered.

Angel just chuckled and kissed her forehead.

They sat in a comfortable silence for awhile when she spoke up.

"What about us?" She asked slowly.

"What about us?" Angel asked back.

"I'm going to New York. You'll be here." Buffy said.

"We'll manage." Angel murmured, his lips grazing her skin.

"How?" Buffy asked.

"All I have to do is finish this year, and I'll apply to NYU." Angel said .

"You'd move and leave everything for me?" Buffy asked.

"Of course. I'd stop time for you." Angel whispered.

"Stop it now…" Buffy whispered as her lips met his in a gentle kiss. A kiss full of promises and dreams.

Epilogue

A week later, Buffy was out of the hospital. Her wound was still raw and painful, but it was healing better. She was packing up her room. Leaving everything behind. Starting anew. She still felt guilt for killing Riley, but w as dealing. Everyone had heard about her leaving and at one time or another, came and gave her their condolences. The police had closed the case of Joyce Summers and Buffy had not been charged for killing Riley. Angel had been right. It had been labeled as self defense. Buffy was sad in a way. She was leaving home. Where her Mom had been there with them. She was leaving memories behind. Good and bad. Buffy carried her last bag down to the car. When she climbed down the stairs, her Dad took the bag and chastised her for lifting things.

"You don't want to end up in the hospital again, do you? No straining yourself."

"God, Daddy, you make me sound like I'm pregnant." Buffy sighed.

Hank stopped and looked at her, "You're not, are you? Because if you are, I will kill that boyfriend of yours." He threatened.

Buffy just shook her head and laughed softly, "Daddy…" She said and kissed his cheek.

"Remember, take care of your sister." Hank reminded her.

"I will."

Buffy walked out to the car and saw Angel leaning up against it, sunglasses shading his eyes from the sun.

"Hey." Buffy said, walking up to him and kissing him.

"Hey back." He whispered, cradling her head.

"This seems surreal." Buffy whispered.

"I know. You're leaving." Angel said, looking into her eyes sorrowfully.

"I'll come back soon." Buffy promised.

"I'll visit on the weekend." Angel promised.

"You don't have…"

"I want to." Angel interrupted.

Hank drove them to the airport and Dawn, Angel, and Buffy walked up to the boarding gate.

"I love you…" Angel whispered, kissing her deeply, too show her how much he's miss her.

"I love you too." Buffy murmured.

"Call me when you get there." Angel said, kissing her forehead.

"I will."

"Flight 124, Sunnydale to New York, last boarding call at gate 13." The intercom announced. Dawn was already in line and handing in her tickets.

"I'll miss you." Buffy whispered, kissing him one last time, then turning away. She wasn't good at goodbyes.

"Don't go falling in love!" Angel called, half serious.

"Too late!" Buffy called back.

Angel could see tears in his love's eyes. God, how were they going to get through this? 3,000 miles away from each other. His eyes turned to the ground as he tried to blink his own tears away. Suddenly, small hands were grabbing his face as soft lips sought his hungrily. Angel opened his eyes to see Buffy's green ones.

"I love you." She whispered, then ran back to the gate.

Angel watched her as she disappeared into the plane. He watched her take off.

"I love you Buffy…" Angel whispered as he watched the plane disappear.

*

Angry eyes watched this exchange in fury. The little cheerleader would get hers. The little bitch, if she thought this was over, then they had no idea. Because, it wasn't Riley who had tried to drown her…

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