From: "abandt3" <ABandt@aol.com>

Disclaimer: Willow and the rest of the Buffyverse do not belong to me, they belong to Joss Whedon and Company.

Classification: See Author Notes

Rating: Probably nothing worse then the shows so TV-14, if it strays higher then that I'll let you know.

Spoilers: Anything up to Wrecked for Buffy and Billy for Angel is fair game. Wrecked especially.

Distribution: If you want it, please take it -- just let me know where it's going.

Feedback: Yes please! Just no flames.

Section Summary: Feeling alone and scared Willow travels to England for help.

* * *

Part 1

It was raining in Bath.

Giles didn't mind the rain, it fit the dark mood he'd been in
since leaving the States. There had been no warm good-byes this
time. This time the various group members had been so wrapped up in
their own crumbling lives that they didn't have time to give a
passing thought to the man who was abandoning them once again to the
cold hard truth of life.

(If it rains so much, shouldn't they call it Shower?)

The voice sounded so much like Xander's, the question so much
like the stupid things he was always saying that Giles couldn't help
but smile out the damp window. He never thought the day would come
that he would miss Xander Harris but that day had come. He sighed
and turned his head away from the window and tried to concentrate on
the thick book resting in his lap.

"Really Rupert," a cultured English voice spoke softly from the
seat next to him. "If it bothers you as much as it clearly does,
perhaps leaving wasn't the right thing to do."

With another weary sigh he slipped his glasses of his nose and
rubbed his eyes before turning to the woman sitting next to
him. "That's just it Caroline, leaving was the only thing I *could*
do."

"So you've said," Caroline answered with a sigh of her own.

"Buffy would have continued to rely on me for everything,
whether it was as a training partner, to do her research, or as a
surrogate parent for Dawn. All her life she's been asking for her
independence now it's her time to learn how to live with it."

"Perhaps in the long run that's a good idea, but now -- after
everything she's just been through..."

"Don't you think I know I'm leaving her at the worst possible
time I could choose to do so?" Giles snapped at her.

He turning to look back outside into the rain drenched English
night. His heart squeezed in his chest as he remembered the look of
betrayal in Buffy's eyes when he told her he was leaving. Betrayal,
hurt, confusion. He was just one more person in a long line of
people who'd left her. The very last person she probably ever
thought would hurt her like that. It was *that* reason, more then
any other, that he'd had to do it then. She had been through so
much, seen so many hard things. She'd died twice. Seen heaven. Yet
she was still the same little girl who, despite all her arguments to
the contrary, needed someone to make everything okay again at the end
of the day. He could see the signs of things to come, with Spike
with the gang. If he didn't show her that she could do it on her
own, then she may never learn that lesson. So not matter how much it
hurt the both of them to leave her -- it was something that needed to
be done.

"If I didn't leave now..." he started, his voice raspy with
emotion. "I might never be able to leave her."

His hand was soon covered by her smaller one, he squeezed it
gently and sent her a small smile. He'd known Caroline Smith for as
long as he could remember. Their fathers had worked together in the
Council long before they'd even been a thought. They spent their
summers together trying to pretend the camp they'd been forced to
attend was just a normal summer camp, instead of the training camp it
actually was. She'd also fought against the death grip of the
council in her teenage years. She didn't want to follow in her
father's footsteps anymore the he'd done. She'd managed to escape it
better the he had.

Her mother had been sympathetic and her brother was more then
eager to join the council so she'd been able to attend medical school
and become a doctor. She'd even managed to practice for a few years
before the lure of the old ways called her back. She wasn't a true
Watcher, she was still a doctor, though these days she was more
interested in demon physiology then human. She'd looked him up the
first time he was back in England. The fact that she lived in Bath
had been one of the main reasons he chose to live there instead of
London. Their friendship, though long left dormant had sprung back
to life quickly. Now that he was back again he sensed she'd like
things to progress further but she also knew well enough to leave it
alone. At least until he'd unpacked the numerous emotional bags he'd
brought back with him from the States.

"I understand why you left, Rupert. But that doesn't mean you
have to cut off all contact with them." Caroline gently reminded him.

He smiled dryly and shook his head. "Buffy made it very clear
that if I left she wanted nothing further to do with me. And the
others..." he trailed off as he thought of the rest of the gang, his
heart squeezed in his chest again. He really hadn't thought he'd
miss any of them as much as he did. What had started out 5 years as
simply a job had spiraled into something much more then that.

"The others..."

"The others..." he shuddered slightly as the images of a dream
he'd had recently flickered across his memory. "The others know they
can get a hold of me is the need to. Day or night, I'll always be
there for them."

"You're thinking about the dream...the one about..." Caroline
struggled for a name, she had tried very hard to become aware of the
small group he'd left behind in Sunnydale but it was slow going.

"Willow," he supplied it easily still caught up in the image of
her struggling against something he hadn't been able to see.
Tendrils of black smoke and dark magicks pulling her into a
bottomless hell. "It was just a nightmare. Brought on about the
stress of the last week."

She nodded, knowing that what he'd said was probably true. It
had been a stressful week, she had agreed to accompany him the
Watcher's Compound when he'd received the summons. Though he'd been
back in England for several weeks it was the first time they'd
contacted him. He'd been expecting the call. And he'd been right
about what they wanted to talk to him about. The Slayer. Now that
she was back in the Council's hands they felt that she needed a
Watcher. Giles had argued that the very *last* thing she wanted or
needed at this point was a new Watcher. They had pointed out that he
was no longer in charge of her and should have no comments in what
they did about her. He pointed out that they asked him to come
because he was still the only one who had any chance or knowledge
about how to go about controlling her and said that if the Council
attempted to send another Watcher to Sunnydale it would turn out
badly. Buffy might very well quit again.

After he had their attention, he reminded them that he had not
exactly quit being Buffy's Watcher, he'd simply stepped back in the
duties he now thought were necessary for that role. What she needed
now was much different then what she needed 5 years ago. She no
longer needed a teacher or a constant hand to guide her.

Buffy had lived years longer then any Slayer before her and she
was fast approaching the age of 21. She was no longer theirs to
control it was best to let her continue in her current role and help
her out when she needed it. Though Travers and the others hadn't
wanted to they finally bowed to his arguments. By the time the talk
had turned to trying to figure out what to do about Faith, Giles had
quietly exited the room. Caroline found him hours later in the only
room that had ever held his attention in the cavernous compound. The
Central Library had always been his sanctuary and he was knee deep in
books about dreams when she'd finally located him.

"Rupert, we both know that a dream isn't always 'just a dream,'"
she reminded him.

He laughed dryly, sliding his glasses back on his nose. "I'm
not the Slayer, Caroline. None of my dreams have ever come true.
Well, except that musical comedy one..."

"Even if it's not a prophetic dream it's probably your
subconscious's way of telling you that's it's time for *you* to call
*them*. No harm from calling Willow to find out if she's okay."

He sighed, though he was sure it was just a dream he still
hadn't been able to shake the feeling of dread that had settled in
the pit of his stomach. "Perhaps you're right."

"I *know* I'm right. And after you've asked Willow how she is --
you can ask her how Buffy is doing." There was a slight teasing
tone in her second remark.

Giles sent her a warning glare. Caroline had gotten it into her
head that perhaps the reason Giles had felt the need to leave the
Slayer had more to do about the different types of feelings he was
having for Buffy. Perhaps underneath everything else Giles thought
she might be closer to the truth then he was ready to admit. But now
was not the time to be examining those feelings. Even if it was, it
would never make any difference anyway.

The Council's car slid to a stop, through the rainy window Giles
could make out the two level building he now called home. He
actually lived in the completed basement of Caroline's house. He
supposed there was a certain amount of irony in the fact that now
Xander had a place of his own and he now called a basement home. But
if was fully furnished and cozy and he'd shown back up in Bath on
short notice and Caroline had been kind enough to allow him to use it
until he decided where exactly he was going to go to next.

"We're here," he stated unnecessarily.

He jumped slightly when the door on Caroline's side opened
revealing the car's driver. Council perks he supposed, but he had to
admit he missed driving on his own. Still he'd have to get reused to
driving on the left side of the road. Silly American's and their
need to be different then anyone else. After Caroline was standing
dryly under an umbrella the driver moved around the car prepared to
let him out. Out of habit he'd opened the door on his own and by the
time Caroline had gotten around with the second umbrella he was
already wet.

"Thank you, Stevens," Caroline said to the driver as he closed
the door and sent Giles an annoyed glance before getting back into
the car. "You want to come up for some tea?" She asked Giles as the
headed toward the front door.

He shook his head. "No, I think I should make that phone call."

"Good," she said with a smile. "What was that?" she asked
suddenly stopping in place.

"What?"

"I thought..." she trailed off peering through the rainy
night. "I thought I heard a moan."

"Animal?" Giles asked, instinct kicked in me his arm closed
around her waist, his eyes scanning the surrounding area for any sign
of danger.

"No," Caroline answered, shaking her head. "It
sounded...human. There..." she said as this time a distinctive moan
came from the bushes on their right side.

Giles' eyes narrowed as he inched closer to the bush, putting
his body fully between it and Caroline. Stepping out from beneath
the umbrella he bushed the branches and nearly jumped backwards and
the waves of magick rushed out to meet him. Another moan came
quickly after it, this time it was clearly a moan of anguish and
pain. With a deep breath he pushed the branches further aside and
kneeled next to the body that was lying beneath it in a feal position.

"What is it, Rupert?" Caroline said her voice tense as she eased
behind him to peer over his shoulder. "Oh my god," she said softly
taking in the wet and shivering form. Her doctor instincts kicked in
immediately as she pushed Giles out of the way to get closer. "It's
a female, don't see any signs of external injuries."

"Careful Caroline, whoever she is she's..." he trailed off as
Caroline pushed back the wet hair to reveal a surprisingly familiar
face. "...powerful." His heart dropped like a lead weight into his
stomach and he forced himself to move forward instead of giving into
the urge to throw up. "Willow..." he whispered in horror.

She was extremely pale, her wet hair a shock of red against an
almost translucent canvas. Her skin was feverish and clammy to his
touch, she shuddered violently as he tried to pry her clothes from
the branches. There was no telling how long she'd been there outside
the house waiting for him to return, but it had been raining for
several days. Once he had her free of the branches he eased her out
from underneath the bush as gently as possibly. As he lifted her
into his arms her eyes fluttered open, dull and glassy she blinked up
at him for a few endless moments before they slid shut again.

"Giles...please...so sorry." Her voice was dry and raspy. She
shuddered again as another wave of thick magick rolled off her.

"Willow..." he whispered softly in confusion over her
condition. It was obvious to someone with even a passing interest in
magick that something major had happened with hers. The desperation
in her voice as she'd begged for forgiveness had cut through him like
a knife. What had happened to her...and why hadn't anyone called him?

"Rupert.... Rupert!" Caroline's voice cut through the fog he'd
built up around him after realizing who Willow was. From the tone of
her voice it was obvious she'd been trying to get his attention for a
few moments, she'd draped her jacket over the shivering form in his
arms and positioned the umbrella over the both of them. "We need to
get her inside."

Shaking himself out of his stupor, Giles nodded in
agreement. "Of course."

Shifting Willow's slight weight in his arms, he brought her
closer to his chest. Using a free hand, he wrapped the jacket more
tightly around her body and let Caroline lead the way into the house.

Out of the rain.
 

Part 2

     "We're going to need to get her out of these wet clothes,
Rupert." Caroline called to Giles as he pulled blankets and towels
from the small closet in the bedroom.

     Finally managing to pull Willow's tennis shoes off her feet, she
turned her attention to the soaked jacket.  The girl was fully
shaking now, occasionally letting out a deeper shudder which sent a
wave of thick, cloying magick out across the room.  Giles came back
into the room, handing the pile he was carrying to her he went back
across the room to the small dresser and pulled out a pair of dry
sweatpants and T-shirt.  Willow moaned in her sleep, clutching at the
blankets beneath her.  Caroline shook her head as she went to work on
the girls jeans.

     "Withdrawal," she muttered softly.  She took Willow's arm and
pushed up the wet sweater sleeve trying to be as unobvious as
possibly while looking for any signs of drug use.

     "You won't find anything, Caroline." Giles said as he came up to
the bed and placed the dry clothes on it.  "It's not that type of
withdrawal."

     "Magick?" Caroline asked softly.  The torn look on his face shot
right to her gut, she turned to look at the young woman who was
causing it.  She realized, not for the first time, that he really
viewed those he had left behind in America as his children.  She
wondered if *he* realized it.

     He nodded his head, reaching out to brush a red lock from
Willow's forehead.  Beneath his soft touch her skin burned with
fever.  "Yes." He answered simply.  "I just don't understand why no
one called to tell me that she had gotten this far...I mean, I of all
people should have been there to help her through this." He flinched
as he realized that he *hadn't* been there to help her through this.
Not even close.

     She reached out and took his hand.  "Maybe she'll tell you
herself, she came all this way for a reason," she reminded him as she
turned her attention back to the shivering girl.  "But first we need
to take care of her fever."

     "Is it bad?" Giles asked softly, unsure he wanted to hear the
answer.

     "It's hard to tell.  She's got a lot going on with her system
and neither one is helping the others."  She looked up at him and
caught him fighting with nervous tension.  "Why don't you get my bag
from upstairs.  I'll finish getting her out of these clothes."

     He sent her a grateful smile for giving him something to do.
Entering the upstairs through the basement entrance he continued to
her study and grabbed the black leather medical bag from her desk.
Pausing to give Caroline enough time to get Willow's clothes changed
he fingered the handles of the bag with a small smile.  He had given
Caroline the bag years ago after she'd graduated from medical
school.  It had been several long years after he'd been redrafted
into the Watcher's Council.  It was as much as a congratulation gift
for avoiding the "life sentence" as it was for actually graduating.

     He let 10 minutes pass before carefully reentering the basement
with bag in tow.  He knocked on the bedroom door, waiting until she
called out to him that it was okay before entering.  As he came up to
his bed he was struck again how pale Willow looked, veins visibly
crawled across her skin like a street map.  He handed Caroline her
bag and then waited for her to give him something to do.  Anything to
keep his mind off of the fact that he hadn't been there when Willow
had clearly needed him.

     Minutes ticked by as Caroline tried to be as gentle as possible
with the still shaking girl.  Though gentle, she was clearly trying
to be as through as possible.  Giles paced the width of the small
room, his mind flicking from what was going on by the bed, to what
could have happened in Sunnydale, to most ominously -- his dream.
Clearly that had been a message from someone that Willow was in
serious trouble, but he had brushed it aside as simply a dream.  He,
the Watcher of a Slayer, well versed in the ins and outs of prophetic
dreams, should have known better.

     He started pacing the width of the room.  As the shock of
finding Willow faded away into guilt and worry he began to wonder
what could have happened.  Obviously it was something involved in
Magick but what exactly?  And why did she seem to be leaking so much
magick from her every breath.  Something tugged at his memory,
something from that long ago time that he spent in the depths of his
rebellion.  The time he spent with Ethan.

     He shook his head, he could worry about exactly what happened
when she woke up.  Then she could tell him herself.  He stopped short
in his pacing his eyes snapping to Willow on the bed.  For the first
time it began to sink in just how they had found her.  Huddled under
a bush in the rain -- completely alone.  Where were the others?  He
shuddered.  Something very bad had happened.  Something bad enough
that she had left her friends and her home to come to him for help.

     "Giles?" Caroline's voice cut through the haze of guilt and
confusion surrounding him.

     His eyes snapped over to where she was covering the still
shivering Willow with his comforter.  "You're done?" he asked quietly.

     "For now, I've given her some antibiotics -- that should help
bring the fever done.  I'm more concerned about the amount of magick
she's throwing off.  Is she a true witch?"

     Giles walked over to the bed and stared down and the girl.
Caroline was right, the magick seemed to be coming off in more steady
waves.  With every wave she threw off her heartbeat and breathing
became more irradiate.  His blood ran cold as he realized what she
was doing to herself.

Without acknowledging Caroline's last question he turned and hurried
across to an antique chest and rooted through the darker Watcher's
Diaries and other items he had locked in it, away from prying eyes
and eager hands.  At the very bottom was a mental locked box.  Inside
the box was a leather pouch that radiated magical energy.  Untying
the leather tie he carefully searched through the crystals it held
until he found the one he was looking for.  It was relatively simple
compared to the others, clear and round with with a hole drilled in
it.  Keeping the leather tie he placed the crystals back in the box
and the box back in the chest before returning to the bed.

      Giles chanted softly under his breath as he slid the leather
tie carefully through the hole in the crystal.  Though it had been
over a decade since he'd last used them they rolled easily off his
tongue as if they'd never been buried within him.

     Caroline watched with wide eyes as the crystal in his hand gave
a great spark of light then faded to an even glow.  Though she was
familiar with the magick arts she'd never had an opportunity to
practice them herself nor had she witnessed them very often.  She was
more content with her dusty medical tomes and science.  Even if her
science would border more on science fiction for most people.  With a
soft sigh, Giles opened his eyes and pushed the blanket off Willow,
tying the leather strand around her wrist making sure it was tight
enough that the crystal rested snugly against the skin on the back of
the wrist.

     Instantly the clear glow on the crystal became murky, darkening
until it became a swirling cloud of black smoke.  Willow gave a
little shudder and quickly began to breath smoothly, her heart beat
slowed to steady pulse.  The waves of magick she'd been sending out
slowed until it became the barest trickle and then stopped all
together.

     Giles shuddered, his hands shaking as he pulled the blanket back
around Willow's shoulders and then he turned and left the room
without a word.  Leaving Caroline to hurry after him.  In the small
living room/kitchen area he slumped down onto the couch and closed
his eyes.  It was clear to Caroline that whatever spell he'd just
weaved around Willow had taken a lot out of him.  She sat next to him
on the couch, laying a supporting hand on his arm, letting the
silence spread around them.

     "Tainted," he eventually muttered, more to himself them anything.

     "What, Rupert?" Caroline asked carefully, sensing that it was
important for him to talk about it.

     He opened his eyes but didn't lower his head from his
spot.  "She's been tainted.  Something very dark -- evil -- has
touched her magick -- her soul.  It's been twisted around inside her
so much that she can no longer recognize it as her own and she's
pushing it away from her."

     "And that's not a good thing?" she asked.

     "You asked before if she was a true witch?" Caroline nodded,
Giles sighed and finally lowered his head to look at her.  "I've long
suspected that she is.  Her ability came out of nowhere while she was
still rather young, but there were -- circumstances -- that could
have led to such a strong ability being activated without the normal
events surrounding a witch coming into her power.  I didn't realize
just how powerful she was until she brought Buffy back..."

     "You said that Tara and the others helped, perhaps Tara..."

     "From the explanation I've heard the others merely served as her
circle, keeping her centered giving her their strength.  She's the
one who actually did the magick -- and the only one that took any
personal risk."

     "If she is a true witch," Caroline said.  "Then loosing her
magick at this rate..."

     "For a witch the magick is as much a part of them as blood...if
you loose too much blood..." He trailed off, unable to bring himself
to say what was a very real possibility.

     Caroline jumped to her feet.  She hadn't lost a patient yet and
the urge to do everything in her power to keep that from happening
ran through her.  "But you did that spell -- with the crystal and it
stopped the flow."

     Giles shook his head.  "It's only temporary, eventually the
magick being trapped by the crystal will become too much and it will
begin leaking again."  He stood and walked over the door between the
living room and the bedroom.  "The only person who can stop the flow
is her."  He sighed, slipping his glasses off his nose he rubbed his
temple.  "I just wish I knew what happened to her."

     "You could call Sunnydale," Caroline pointed out
logically.  "They'd probably be able to tell you what happened.

     Giles shook his head and turned away from the door to look at
her.  "Willow chose to come to me for help.  I should wait to hear
what happened from her."

     "She won't be able to tell us anything until she wakes up..."
she reminded him gently.  She admired him for wanting to hear it from
Willow first but she wanted him to remember that they didn't know how
long it would take her to wake up.

     "Then I guess the only thing we can do -- is wait."
 

Part 3

     Giles watched the flow of Willow's breathing.  It was now steady
and easy, the breathing of someone having a nice, peaceful sleep.  He
unknowingly was matching his own breathing to hers as he slipped
closer and closer to his own realm of sleep.

     The Watcher's Diary he'd been working on had long since slipped
to the side of the bed as he settled into Willow Watching.  It could
wait, it was his own.  He'd been working on getting it up to date.
For someone who had harped on both Buffy and Xander to complete their
homework in timely fashion he was having a hard time following his
own advice.  It was one thing to research another Watcher's
experiences and teachings it was quite another to put his own down
into words.  Most of his time with Buffy had been spent practcing
unorthodox methods, hardly the things he wanted to pass on to the
next generation of Watcher's.

     But then again those methods had seemed to work with both Buffy
and in Angel's dealings with Faith -- perhaps those were just the
things the next Watcher would need to know for their own Slayer --
whomever she may be.  If anything Buffy, Kendra and Faith had driven
home the point that not every Slayer was the same and needed to be
treated accordingly.  Some Slayers thrived under strict teachings and
training like Kendra had. Some needed independence but a more patient
hand like Buffy.  Then there were others, well they would need much
more specialized help -- like Faith.  If only he had known that in
the beginning -- perhaps if he'd made a little more time for her they
could have averted the path she had chosen.

     His eyes traveled blearily over to Willow's sleeping form and he
frowned.  How had he allowed himself to make the same mistake twice?

    No.  He refused to believe that Willow had gone that far, either
by accident like he himself had all those years ago and he certainly
hoped that it had not been by choice.  He didn't think that last was
true.  Her current condition was not of someone who was comfortable
with her magick, any magick at all, let alone dark and controlling
magick.  It was exactly the opposite in fact.  She was so desperate
to rid herself of her magick that she was slowly bleeding herself to
death.  The very fact that she had come to him bode well for her
state of mind about whatever had in fact happened.  She wanted help.
She wanted *his* help.

     And Giles was determined to give her whatever help he needed.
This time he would take the time to, instead of allowing her to once
again slip through the cracks of his busy and hectic life.

     "Rupert?" Caroline's voice cut softly through his reverie as she
laid a gentle hand on his shoulder.  He jumped slightly at her
unexpected contact and graced her with a sheepish smile when she
removed her hand.  "Why don't you go upstairs and try to get some
sleep."

     Giles slid his glasses back onto his face, stretching slightly
as he shifted to a sitting position.  "I'm fine."

     "Rupert, you've been awake since early this morning.  You need
to take a break." Caroline pointed out gently.

     "I..." he turned to look at the sleeping girl on his bed.  "I
need to stay here."

     "I know you want to be here if she needs you, but it's she's
probably not going to be waking up anytime soon."

     "But..." he argued.

     "That's a *good* thing, she needs the rest so her body can fight
the fever," she assured him.  "If you make yourself sick...you won't
be able to help her when she *does* wake up."

     Giles sighed, he knew that what Caroline said made sense.  He
just hated the thought of leaving Willow alone.  What if she did wake
up and he wasn't there?  He had run over numerous scenarios in his
head over what might happen when she woke up.  From nothing to
freaking out.  There was even a slim chance that she may not remember
what brought her here -- or even who she was.

     "I'll stay with her, Rupert.  If she wakes up I'll let you know
immediately..." Caroline said softly, knowing exactly where his train
of thought was going.  "I'll check her over again and probably give
her some more antibiotics.  I really doubt she'll be awake for a few
more hours."

     Nodding in halfhearted agreement, Giles glanced over at Willow
and sighed.  He pulled himself to a standing position and then
reached over and closed the journal and placed it the bedside table.
Before he would allow himself to get some rest though he had to check
one more thing.  Pulling the blankets aside he gently took Willow's
arm in his hand and checked the condition of the crystal wrapped
tightly to her wrist.  It was much darker then it had been a few
hours ago.  A pitch black swirling mass that caused a slight shiver
to travel down his spine.  The rate she was forcing her magick from
her was alarming.  It would not be long before the crystal would be
overloaded and could no longer do it's job of protecting her.  He
only hoped she would be awake and able to stop the flow before it
came to that.

     "Perhaps you're right, I could at least get something to eat.
And to check my messages," he said as he adjusted the blankets back
around the sleeping Willow.  Before he turned to Caroline he let his
fingers brush across the girls brow.  To his uneducated touch the
skin beneath his own felt cooler then it had earlier.  He took that
as a very good sign.

     As he left the room he paused in the doorway to look back at the
bed.  Caroline and pushed back the covers and was thoroughly checking
Willow over again.  He forced himself to turn and leave the room.
Willow was in good hands, Caroline would take good care of her.

     As he passed through the living room to the small kitchen area
he made note that the message light on his answering machine was
blinking.  It occurred to him as he prepared his tea and a light meal
that maybe one of the messages was from Sunnydale.  He hoped so.
Sitting down at the table he told himself he'd finish his meal, check
his message and then take Caroline up on her offer to use her
apartment to get a few hours of sleep.  He'd check in on Willow
before heading upstairs and give Caroline some signs to look for with
the magick.  He knew without a doubt that if something happened
Caroline would call upstairs for him.

     Reassured by the his thoughts he even took the time to wash the
dishes he had messed while preparing his meal.  He smiled to himself
as he cleaned the area, he knew the gang in Sunnydale would roll
their eyes but humor him.  He had always been a bit of a neat freak
he'd admit to himself.  But it was more out of necessity now that any
anal retentiveness.  This kitchen area was even smaller then the one
in Sunnydale, if he didn't keep it clean it would soon be lost in the
clutter.

     Satisfied that the rest of the cleaning could keep for another
time he walked across the living room to the small desk and pressed
the play button on the machine.  The first few messages were junk
messages, then a few from friends -- including one from Olivia whom
he had called when he'd first arrived in England and had been waiting
for her to call him back.  It was the last message, however, that
made his heart pick up steam.

     It was Dawn.

     "Uh, Giles hi, this is Dawn.  I..." she trailed off, it was
clear from her voice that something was wrong.  "I...I think you...."
She paused again, seeming to change thoughts in mid stream.  "I wish
you were there.  Uhm, it's about Willow.  She's disappeared and I
think she may be in trouble...if you hear from her please let us
know." She ended on a much stronger note then she started but there
was definite fear in her voice.  "Just call -- please, me or --
Xander...not Buffy." She paused one final time before ending.  "Bye,
miss you."

     Giles frowned at that last plead.  He was more confused and
angry that no one had called him before this.  Willow's condition was
not something that had happened overnight.  Obviously whatever had
happened in Sunnydale had progressed to the point where Willow needed
to leave and Dawn didn't want him speaking to Buffy.  He reached over
to pick up the phone, knowing that with the time difference he should
be able to catch someone awake.  He'd try Xander's first, knowing
that he'd be less likely to get Buffy there.

     "Rupert!" Caroline's sharp cry brought him crashing back to
reality.

      She sounded frantic and scared.  All thoughts of calling
Sunnydale left and he dropped the handset to the floor and took off
towards the bedroom.  He stopped short in the doorway in shock.
Waves of magick crashed over him.  Willow was thrashing around on the
bed moaning and crying.  Caroline was fighting desperately to keep
her calm but it was loosing battle.  One of Willow's flailing arms
smacked into Caroline's face sending her crashing backwards off the
bed.

     "Bloody hell," Giles muttered softly to himself as he rushed
towards her.

     Cradling her cheek Caroline pushed his hands away.  "I'm fine,
help her!"

     Giles turned back toward the bed, what he saw there sent shivers
down his spine.  She was no longer thrashing about on the bed,
instead she was shuddering deeply.  The waves of the magick were
coming in thick, steady waves.  She was whimpering softly to herself,
as he leaned over her body he could just barely make out what she was
repeating.

     "So sorry...so sorry...so sorry."

     It hit him in that moment that she was dying in front of him.

     The amount of magick she was forcing from herself had become too
much for the crystal protecting her and it most likely had
shattered.  Now if he didn't do something to calm her down and to
slow the flow for all intents and purposed she would bleed to death.

     Sliding onto the bed next to her he turned her body into a fetal
position facing the wall he curled his own body around her.  She
filched away from him but he forced her to stay where she was.
Whispering softly to her he ran his hand over her hair in what he
hoped was a soothing manner.  Eventually she stopped fighting him and
leaned back into his arms.  He wouldn't be able to say later how long
they laid like that but eventually her shaking subsided.  The waves
of magick slowed though not as much as he would have liked.  In the
silence that had descended over the room he was able to make out the
words that she was whispering.  Not all of but enough to realized
that sorry, Dawn, and Buffy featured heavy.

     When she finally fell back into an uneasy sleep he allowed
himself to pull away from her.  As gently as possible he took her
right arm in his hand and rolled it over to inspect the crystal.
Though he was already expecting it the sight of the shatter crystal
made his stomach twist.  Blood oozed from the broken skin, he was
sure there were shards deeply imbedded into her skin and others
covered the sheet beneath her.  His first concern would be to change
the sheets and take care of the wound.  Carefully he removed the
leather cord that had help the crystal in place and wrapped a
handkerchief he'd had in his pocket tightly in its place to stop the
flow of blood.

     Clear in what he needed to do he turned around on the bed and
caught sight of Caroline.  She was curled in the chair by the bed
he'd been sitting in earlier, her closed eyes testimony to how much
time had actually passed since the incident started.  Her right cheek
was covered with a purple, splotchy bruise where Willow had struck
her.  With a frown he gently ran his finger across the skin, her eyes
fluttered open as he removed them.

     "She's got one hell of a right hook," she said dryly grinning up
at him then grimaced as pain shot through her cheek.  "Even if it
wasn't intentionally."

     His frown deepened and he heaved a tired sigh.  "I shouldn't
have left."

     She shook her head in exasperation.  "You couldn't have known
this would happen -- she was fine when you left."

     He didn't answer her.  Instead he walked across the room to the
closet and pulled out a second set of sheets he kept stored there.
Coming back across the room he dropped them onto the bed and as
gently as possible he eased Willow into his arms.  Then he turned and
carefully placed her onto the chair that Caroline had abandoned when
she realized what his plan was.  He took his bathrobe from the back
of the chair and wrapped into around her body then turned his
attention back to his bed.  While he stripped and remade then bed,
Caroline turned her attention to pulling they crystal shards from
Willow's skin and bandaging the wound.

     When the bed was made and Willow was once again buried beneath a
mound of covers and sleeping calmly, Giles gestured that Caroline
should follow him out of the room.  He began to pace the living room,
rubbing his hand across his aching brow he realized that somewhere
along the line he'd lost his glasses.  He caught sight of them where
he'd left them, resting safely on the table where he'd ate his meal.
As he slid them on Caroline was reminded of a knight-of-old sliding
on his armor.  Ready to do battle.

     "Is it bad?" she asked quietly from the spot she had taken on
the couch.

     "Without the crystal the amount of magick she's pushing away
from herself won't be stopped.  She's not going to be able to keep it
up for very much longer..." he trailed off unable to bring himself to
finish his train of thought.

     Caroline quickly realized what he couldn't bring himself to
say.  "Couldn't you locate another crystal?" She asked gently, she
could tell from the expression on his face that she needed to tread
lightly in this unknown territory.

     "I might be able to locate one -- it's possible I have another
one in my collection but even if I can find another one it won't do
her any good for a couple of days."

     "I don't understand."

     With a heavy sigh he dropped into the desk chair, leaning over
to pick of the phone handset and set it next to him.  "It's a Hollak
crystal, generally it's used to stop an outside force from drawing
the magick off a source.  Once it's activated the only way stop the
blocking spell is a counter incantation."

     "So what happens -- when it's broken?"

     "The crystal is not easily broken.  Once the spell has been cast
there's only on way for it's too be broken.  A severe influx of
magick from within the wearer..."

     "Which is what happened during Willow's...reaction...back there?"

     "Precisely," he rubbed his hand against his aching brow again,
his brain filtering through everything and anything he could think of
that could control or stop a flow of magick this size -- aside from
the Hollak crystal he could think of nothing.

     "So why can't the spell be cast again?"

     "Because of the strength of the spell, and the affect it has on
the crystals wearer the spell cannot be done without a there being a
cleansing spell done first.  Otherwise it does more harm then
good...  Generally it's done by the crystal wearer...and doesn't take
a great deal of time."

      "But with Willow not able to participate..." Caroline slowly
began to realize just where this conversation was going.

     "It's been done on an unconscious source but it's
unpredictable...and the results are uncertain.  I don't know how long
it would take..."

     "Rupert," Caroline said softly.  "I think you need to call
Sunnydale and find out what happened.  I know you want to wait until
she wakes up to find out from her first...but she might *not* wake
up.  We can't help her until we know exactly what happened."

     "I think it has something to do with Dawn.  She kept saying her
name when I was trying to calm her," Giles said with a painful sigh.

     "Is that the last message you played?"

     "Yes, why?"

     "I think you may be right...she was fine until you played that --
 then she started thrashing about..."

     Giles' head fell, everything was beginning to fall into place.
Something had happened with Dawn and Buffy, in a protective reflex,
must have pushed Willow away -- afraid and alone she had turned to
the one person she hoped would understand.  He still couldn't begin
to image what the trip to England must have been like for her in the
condition she was in.

     "If you don't want to talk to Buffy...maybe there's someone
close that could even find out what happened?" She paused remembering
something.  "Doesn't Patrick's son live in California?"

     "Wesley," Giles mumbled into his hand.  "He lives in LA now."

     "Ah that's right...I think I met him once before he returned to
the States.  If I remember right he works for that vampire..."

     Giles' head shot up.  "Angel...he works for Angel."

     "Yes, that's it," she watched as he whirled in his chair and
start searching through the antique desk.  "What are you doing?"

     He made a small noise of triumph as he located his address
book.  He only half heard her question.  "Making that phone call," he
answered her distractedly as he paged through it, locating the loose
piece of paper he had hidden within the pages.  The new phone number
of Angel Investigations.  Punching the transatlantic code into the
phone he listened to his ring for several endless moments.

     "Angel Investigations, we help the...." It was Cordelia's
annoyingly chirpy voice that greeted him when the other side was
finally picked up.

     "Yes, yes I know all that Cordelia," he interrupted impatiently
with an eye roll and the inane slogan they had adopted for
themselves.  "Is Angel there?"

     "Angel, phone!" she screeched on the other end.  "Geeze, isn't
all that tea supposed to make you calm?" he heard her mutter to
someone and could barely make out a sarcastic voice answer back with
a distinctly English accent and he assumed it must be Wesley.

     Another extension picked up and Angel's sleepy voice came over
line.  "I've got it Cordelia."  Cordelia clicked off with an audible
huff. "Hello, this Angel."

     "Angel, it's Giles."

     There was a distinct pause on the other end.  Giles was sure he
was the very last person Angel was expecting to hear from.  Since the
vampire had left Sunnydale for LA he had never contacted Angel.
Their only contact had happened when Angel had come back to Sunnydale
that one Thanksgiving.

     "Ah, Giles...how can I help you?" Angel's voice finally sounded
from the other end, though slight confusion still tinged it.

     Giles liked that Angel had skipped the normal pleasantries and
went right to the problem.  "It's about, Willow."

     "Have you heard from her?" Angel's voice changed instantly, from
sleepy and confused it jumped to alert and concerned.

     "Dawn left me a message," Giles said, deliberately leaving out
the fact that Willow was lying a few feel away in his bed fighting
for her life.  She had come to him for help without letting them
know.  He wasn't about to let the others know where she was until he
knew that it was all right for him to do so.

     "So you called me?" Angel asked suspiciously.

     "Well...Buffy and I didn't part on the best of terms I'm sure
you know, so I didn't want to run the chance of forcing her to talk
to me," he cringed.  Even to his own ears his lie sounded, as Xander
would say, lame.  "Dawn sounded worried...what's wrong with Willow?"

     There was another pause, Giles was sure that Angel could tell
from his tone of voice that he was keeping something from
him.  "We're not really sure," Angel said apparently having decided
to let it go for the moment.  "A couple months ago their was an
incident involving Willow's magick."

    "A couple of *months* ago?" Giles spat out.  The strain of
keeping a cool and level head after an extremely long and emotional
day became too much and he let it slip through in his voice.  "Why
didn't anyone tell *me*?" he demanded.

     "I just found out a couple of days ago when Xander called and to
ask if I could help them find her," Angel said easily, unperturbed by
Giles's show of Anger.

     "Has she...has she been missing for this long?" Giles asked
having recovered his senses enough.  The anger was replaced by pure
pain at the thought of Willow being alone and scared that long.

     "I don't think so.  Xander made it seem like she'd only been
missing for a couple of days."

     "So what happened between the time of the incident and her
disappearance?" Giles wondered out loud.

     "Well, Xander didn't give me all of the details, but..." Angel
started.

     "Rupert..."

     Caroline's hushed but pointed voice cut through his
concentration on the story that Angel was telling him.  Glancing over
at her he saw that her attention was not focused on him but the
direction of the bedroom.  He nearly dropped the phone again as he
followed her direction and glanced at the door.  Willow was standing
in the open doorway, pale as a ghost and shaking uncontrollably.

     "Giles..." she said her voice shaking with pain and the energy
she was exerting even to stand.  She seemed disoriented and confused,
it was more of a search call then one of any certainly.

     "Was that...Willow?" Angel asked sharply from the other side of
the phone.  "Is she in England?"

     Caroline eased up off the couch and moved carefully toward the
girl in the doorway.  Willow flinched away from the unknown female,
nearly tumbling backwards to the ground.  She managed to grabbed the
side of the door and clutched onto it for dear life, it's solid form
giving her her only support.  Caroline backed away quickly, not
wanting to scare the girl too much, she looked desperately over at
Giles.

     "I need to go.  Will you not..." Giles said distractedly to the
vampire on the other side of the phone.

     "I can give you a few days, Giles.  But Xander and Dawn are very
worried about her -- they need to know that she's okay..." he paused
for a few seconds.  "She *is* okay isn't she?"

     "I'll call you back in a few hours." Giles said before clicking
the phone off and setting it down on the desk and standing up.

     Willow's eyes locked on his.  Even at the distance he could see
that they held none of the sparkle or life that he normally
associated with her wide green eyes.  Instead, empty, glassy eyes
stared blankly at him, barely making out who he was.  Then slowly he
watched comprehension flit across her face as she realized just who
he was.  Letting go from the support of the door frame she took a
shaky step in his direction.  She swayed precariously as she took a
second step and Giles knew that she was not going to make it.
Without pausing to think he launched himself in her direction as she
began to crumple to the floor.  Catching her, he lowered them both to
the floor cradling her shuddering form in his arms.  She clutched to
him like a lifeline and gave into the sobs that rocked her body.

     "Please..." she whispered in anguish.

     "Shhhh..." he whispered, determined that she not have to beg for
forgiveness from him.  "You're safe.  I've got you -- you're safe."

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