Three dejected persons trudged their way out of Angel Investigations in a relative daze.

"What the hell just happened in there?" The tallest of the vampire's former employees asked no one in particular.

"It seems that Angel is wandering down the line between good and evil in a rather precarious manner," the Englishman replied.

"Very scary," Cordelia added. "I mean, come on, lawyers aren't exactly the saviors of the universe-especially Wolfram and Hart's lawyers-but just letting them all die? There's just something very un-right about that."

"So Angel's headed back to the Dark Side." Gunn concluded.

"Not to mention that all of us are out of jobs." Wesley and Gunn looked back at her. "What? Someone had to bring it up."

"That seems to be the slightest of our problems at the moment," Wesley indicated. "It seems that Angel won't listen to reason-at least not any of ours."

"Then it's time to bring in the big guns," Cordelia said, a determined look crossing her face as she flipped out her cell.

"From my last discussion with Mr. Giles, it appears to be quite imperative that we *not* bother the Slayer right now.She is in very dire straits with her family-"

"-I wasn't thinking of Buffy," Cordelia interrupted quickly, ignoring the 'who's Buffy?' Gunn uttered in the background. "Nope, someone scarier than that.

"Or, at least when she has to be."

***

It was midday; Angel had had his eyes fixed on the computer screen researching Times articles on the "Late Night Massacre" that had involved the deaths of twelve of the most prestigious and powerful lawyers on the west side of North America. He caught the smell of blood on the air-blood still in its vessels, along with a pounding heart to guide it and a sweet fragrance that he remembered most clearly from his more recent days as Angelus. Immediately he knew who it was.

"Willow." He raised his head without turning to greet her, then went back to reading the articles on the 'Amazon Murders,' as they were being dubbed.

"Hey," she answered quietly, half-unsure of how to address him but at the same time very comfortable talking to the vampire she had regarded as a
friend since the first time he had saved her life. "So." she said, looking over his shoulder to view the screen. "You never told me you knew how to surf the Net."

"You never asked," he snidely remarked back. "So I'm guessing Cordy called you in to yell at me," he said, still looking at the screen.

"Cordelia told me about what happened today."

"And.?"

"What do you want me to say, Angel? That I condemn it, that I condone it?"

Angel sneered in response. "You giving me a lesson on life? 'Cuz I think I've got a couple hundred or so years on you in that category."

"It's just my opinion."

"So, what is it, then?"

"They were evil people, and on a level they really deserved to die-but not at this price." Willow paused for a moment as Angel threw back a listless glance, then returned to his work. "The price meaning your soul, if you haven't figured it out by now." After noting Angel's deliberate silence at the remark, she continued. "You don't need me to tell you that I'm worried about you."

"But you'll tell me anyway," he said, typing in a new search word.

"You betcha," Willow replied with a small smile. She quickly turned back to seriousness and concern. "Angel, what's happened to you? You couldn't
save Darla, so instead of getting support from your friends like you're supposed to do, you forget all of them, then just *let* her and Drusilla go crazy all over LA? Why?"

"Why what?"

"I'm asking why," Willow moved in front of him, switching off the surge protector and the computer in the process. "Why would you throw everything you've worked for out the window because of the one girl you couldn't save?"

"You have no idea what's going on in my mind right now," he answered bitterly.

"Then tell me," she said softly. "Tell me what's wrong, Angel-please," Willow's eyes held a silent, genuine plea to learn about what was going on in her friend's head. They asked him through his thoughts to confide in her, trust her, with or without reason.

There was something about Willow that had always made him putty in her hands, but while Angel felt his walls gradually breaking down he still managed to keep his shield up. "You could never understand it. Not really." He began to walk away towards the staircase as Willow followed his strides closely on his heels.

"Heeey!!" she said, annoyed. "I'm trying to tell you something here, and there's no way you're getting off that easy." Willow stepped in front of
Angel onto the second step, trying to get some sort of height advantage over him. Angel looked unimpressed. "Maybe I can't really picture what it's like to lose somebody you've more or less loved for almost 150 years by your own hand, then lose them again and for some stupid reason or another start to think that the whole thing could've been fine if you had just done something more. But you can't just keep this to yourself; that's why friends are there."

Angel answered by trying to push past her up the stairs; she quickly blocked his exit again. "You going back to Cryptic Guy mode? 'Cuz I don't think any of us would appreciate it if you did."

"What do you care?"

Willow was infuriated. "Hello?! Do you think I pay twenty bucks for a 5:00 a.m. bus ticket with Goddess-only-knows-how-many different connections to keep just anybody from ruining their lives, be they undead or not?!"

"Actually, you probably would," Angel said as a partial compliment. "I'd bet you'd sacrifice your life to save a puppy from drowning."

"I'd say your own sacrifices are pretty much up-to-par with that too, you know."

"And just as ineffective." Angel felt his own heart crack a bit when Willow's heart broke at the statement. He turned away before he could see the tear slide down her cheek, and escaped the Wicca's prying this time by jumping off the banister, grabbing his coat, and heading toward the doors before Willow could stop him.

"Where do you think you're going?" Willow ran down the stairs towards the quick-to-retreat Angel, who had already reached the door.

"Out."

"To do what?"

"Gonna find Dru and Darla."

"And what then? Kill them? Join them?"

"I'll tell you when I find them." By this time he had slammed his car door shut and burned rubber past Willow, who had been standing alongside.

"Damnit," Willow mouthed, her breath forming a small cloud in the cool night air. From her knit bag she pulled out the cell-phone her parents had given her as compensation for never being there when she needed them, and dialed a number. "Yeah, Cordelia? I didn't get a few lines out before
out he went, all 'vroom' and 'whoosh' with the car and everything. He said he's gonna try to find Dru and Darla.no, not good news at all. Yeah, he'll probably wipe out half the demon population in LA to get some answers. -Goddess, I don't know what to do now-I mean, how the heck am I even going to find him, let alone get him to sit his pale butt down so I can show him some reason?!

"*sigh*.I just don't know what to do, Cordy-any ideas?"

***

Willow was both fascinated and 'wigged out' by the Star Wars-esque environment of the demon Karaoke- < Of all things, Karaoke! >-bar to which she had just been brought by Angel's new associate, Gunn. He would have stayed to see the interaction, but as he told Willow, "There's something about this place that's just *way* too freaky for me to think about right now. Besides, I've got some Angel-looking-for to do."

So Willow was left alone in the bar, with a bunch of strangers--demon strangers--surrounding her. She walked around uncertainly for a long time. < Too bad you'll never find this spot in the Triple-A TourBook, > she thought.

"It's a travesty, isn't it? I guess we'll just have to make do with word-of-mouth." Willow turned to look at the falsetto voice that had addressed her, meeting nose-to-chin with one of the scariest-looking demons she had ever seen in the entirety of her life as a resident of Sunnydale, California. She'd have run away screaming if not for the fact she knew he wasn't going to hurt her-the non-threatening appearance in a white cocktail jacket and martini in the left hand helped that effect. "Well, I see someone up for a little soul-searchin'-and in more than one way."

"Eep! Oh, um-hi! Sorry, I wasn't expecting anybody to sneak up on me like that."

"I didn't really sneak up on you, did I? I think you just had some more important things on your mind. Say, for instance, that tall, dark, and handsome dish that comes in here and partakes in the singing once in a while?"

"I'm Willow," she said, extending a hand to shake and eager to meet the demon who would help her find Angel. "I'm guessing you're Torr?" The
green-skinned demon smiled and nodded in response. "Did Cordelia tell you I was coming?"

"Not at all, honey: see, I can predict the future, read your aura--speaking of which, you've got a heck of a lot on your mind, don't ya, little one? Friends with a souled vampire, a Slayer, *and* you're from Sunnydale? Well, how's that for one crazy life?"

"Tell me about it," she said, pausing a moment. "But right now my only big is Angel. I mean, I'm so worried about him, even though I haven't really been talking to him that much--or ever--but when Cordelia called me and told me what a mess he was over here I couldn't just let a friend dangle like that-did you say 'partakes in' a while ago?-but anyway, I tried to talk to him but he just walked off and now I need help finding him before he kills an innocent human, or demon." Willow wasn't even worried about her babbling.

"The big, bloodsucking booby-I mean, can you say 'women problems'? Boy, can that boy choose 'em: totally self-hating, goes off in every other
direction except for taking the gold that's pretty much right in front of him."

"Um, excuse me, but I'm really worried about my friend, and I don't have a minute to spare."

"I can see how much you care about him, in your eyes and in your heart. But there's a rule here, and that's 'no future-telling without song
accompaniment.' That's probably why your friends didn't want to come in with you-didn't want to get stuck on stage. So, you ready to take up the
mike for your friend?"

"You mean, sing?" Willow's eyes reverted to their previous sophomore-stare size, as wide as they had been when she had first found out about vampires. "But you don't know how much I."

"I know, you've got that nightmare about singing opera in front of a huge audience and biting the big one. But hey, you're in college now, so think
of this as a chance to quell those fears."

"There was this one time in Sunnydale that everybody's nightmares came true, and that was one of 'em," Willow said with a shaky voice, "But if it means I can help Angel.then I'm ready." She finished her sentence by keeping her chin up and her head held high.

"Goody for me, then," Torr answered, then got ready to introduce the next singer.

***

"Maybe I didn't make myself clear the first time I broke your arm," the very angry, souled vampire told his unwilling informant. "What do you know about the two girl vamps turning this city inside out?"

"Listen: I already told you, I don't know," the demon said, pleading. "I don't know anything about them. I don't even deal with your kind most of the time."

"Wrong answer," Angel broke the demon's arm one more time for good measure, then threw him into a pile of painful cement pieces in a corner of the old building the demon had been using for his home. "If anyone asks you what happened, tell them Angelus is coming for them next." Angel took a bottle of whiskey from the demon's private stash and stuffed a rag in it, then lit it and threw it against the wall of the building, starting a small wall of flames before leaving.

< Damnit, I'll never get answers out of these idiots, > he yelled at himself.< Better stop by the bar for a little Karaoke and fisticuffs. >

***

Angel burst into the Karaoke bar with the intent to batter a few demons into answering his questions, but was instead greeted with a surprise that ranked right up there with seeing Wesley and Gunn doing the can-can.

Sitting on a barstool and holding the microphone exactly as Darla had only a few days ago, there rested Willow, singing a slightly less sensual song in "You've got a friend." He didn't have much time to ponder her presence before he was approached from behind.

"She really cares about you, ya know." Torr commented behind him. "And every time you just push her away again."

"What's she doing here?" Angel said, unfazed.

"What do you think she's doing here? Geez, Angel, sometimes you're just a little slow."

Angered, the vampire turned around and grabbed his host by the lapels. "I didn't ask for a commentary, just an answer to the question." The other
demons in the bar were about to rush to Torr's aide, but he waived them off.

"Well, somebody's got some misplaced anger, and I'll give ya three guesses as to the souled vampire I'm talking about."

"Angel!" Angel pulled his arm back to give him a punch, but Willow jumped in front of the blow before he could give in to his baser instincts. Willow was furious. "What the hell do you think you're doing? Goddess, do you even know *why* you're punching him in the first place?"

"This isn't the time, Willow. You should be somewhere. Away."

"Please, Angel-just hear me out for a little while. And yeah, I know that there are some roads that you just have to walk alone-"

"-Then you'll understand now when I leave-"

"-Where to, Angel? Please, just calm down for a minute and we can talk..." She placed her hand softly on Angel's arm only to have it firmly pushed away by the retreating vampire. Angel stomped away from the angry redhead, who stalked along after him.

"No way, mister, are you getting rid of me that easy." As Angel walked out the exit, she yelled behind him. "Oh, come on, Angel, what're you trying to do, anyway? You, big scary Vampire-guy, running away-yeah, you heard me, running away-from me? Willow? The girl who's bait for every single vamp in Sunnydale, Harmony included?"

Angel seemed to calm a bit, and for the first time that day turned to face the diminutive Wicca as she continued her speech. She walked towards
him into the chilly night air, standing near to him and looking up into his eyes.

"You have people out there who care about you-people right here in front of you who care about you a lot. And you wanna throw that all away, along with your hopes of redemption, because you couldn't save Darla?"

"I knew her for 150 years, Willow-you can't just brush off something like that."

"But just because you won't 'brush it off' doesn't mean you should go all soulless again because of it!"

"Who said I'd be doing that?"

"Look at yourself, Angel!" Willow yelled demonstrably. "You're purposely alienating yourself from every link to humanity you have left, you're pushing me and the rest of the people who care about you away, either by firing them or putting them down, and you just threatened a bunch of happy singers at a Karaoke bar! Okay, granted, they were happy *demon* singers, but still!"

"The first two things you mentioned were pretty much the same thing."

"So I can't think well when I'm too worried about my friend's well being."

"When did I ever do anything good enough to warrant your calling me a friend?"

"Do you really want me to go down the list, Angel?" She said, a caring tone in her voice. "Yeah, I'll admit that aside from all the times you've saved my life, we haven't really talked about stuff other than Buffy. But, even though I don't know exactly why sometimes, I really care about you, Angel. Cordy tells me about everything you've been doing here, how many people you've saved, what you've done to save them... And I just know that there's something about you that is *definitely* worth caring about. You've helped me so many times, Angel; I think it's my turn to help you."

After appearing to soften somewhat, Angel stiffened up. "You know, as much as I appreciate all this, you can't help me," he said, walking away again. "I need to deal with this. Alone."

"Yeah, like you dealt with the first eighty years you spent alone with a soul, right?" Angel stopped mid-step but didn't turn around. "You're still the same great guy I knew, Angel: maybe you've lost your way a little bit-yeah, I'll give you that-but you're still on the right general path. I haven't given up on you, Angel, and I never will. And I know of at least three other people out there who do give a damn about who you are and the people you save-the lives you change for the better."

He listened to the heartfelt speech with little softening, and instead a certain madness seemed to be taking over him. "You say you trust me, Willow?" Angel said, striking a formidable figure as he stalked towards her. Willow didn't back down, even when Angel had walked close enough to
her that her head was within just a few inches of his chest.

Willow, though slightly vexed by the close quarters, still cared for her friend over all her own doubts and suspicions. "Yes, I trust you. With all my heart," she answered strongly.

He began to walk slowly away, then turned suddenly and seized Willow by the shoulders, pressing her up against the wall of the hallway and changing into full vampire faççade. "Do you trust me now?" he whispered into her ear, his cold breath sending shivers down Willows spine. "You know, I can smell how sweet your blood is right now? It's a lot sweeter than others I've had over the years. It's quite intoxicating, actually." He spoke more rapidly with every additional second, and closed her in so that his body was all that Willow could see. His predatorial instincts picked up on the shorter intakes of breath and quickening heartbeat caused by his unexpected movements.

"Do you trust me now? Huh?!" He accented his question by pounding Willow quickly against the wall while saying the last word.

While tears threatened, none flowed. After a long pause, the redhead instead tilted her head to the left, leaving her jugular fully unprotected. "Always," she said in a deep voice without falter.

As if realizing the situation into which he had put himself, Angel suddenly backed away. He pushed her against the wall and left her there, turning quickly away and marching with his head down in his hands. < My god, what did I just do to Willow? >

And, despite the blood rushing to all her extremities in all different directions, she continued to try to get Angel to open up.

"No matter what you do, Angel, no matter how much you push me away, no matter how far you run, I'm going to be here, Angel-I'm going to be here until you stop doing this crap to yourself."

Angel's mind was muddled, with just the faintest sense of the obscenities being thrown towards him by Willow. He hadn't realized until Willow's simple, trusting words were spoken that whatever instincts had taken over him had taken him over to such a deranged degree: what had at first been some lawyers getting their just desserts had now turned into a very real threat to someone about whom he cared very deeply.

"Goddamnit, Angel! If you don't give a damn about yourself enough to care whether or not you get your redemption, then that's your own business;
but you have people to worry about, people to care about, people who care about you. And I am not going to fucking stand by while you plummet
yourself into oblivion!"

Willow continued, taking his silence for an expression of apathy. The tears now flowed freely. "If you don't give a damn about your own self, then try this argument: I have put too much goddamn time into restoring your soul, into caring about whether or not you were a soulless beast or a good friend, into forgiving you for so many deaths-*so* many, Angel-and into looking for a spell to keep your soul permanent forever, to let you just throw all your hard work *and mine* on some lost cause. Is that clear?!"

By this time Angel was staggering with the idea of how close he had come to giving up on all of it, to succumbing to the dark half of himself-and
taking Willow with him. The world felt so dizzy, so unreal; every step he took gained in heaviness until he could only succeed in dragging his feet
across the floor. Awareness quickly fading, Angel collapsed at the end of the alley, propping himself up against the side of the building.

No sooner did he fall than he found a concerned Willow kneeling in the dirt next to him in her best silk skirt and angora sweater, her hand already on his shoulder and the previous incident already forgotten. For the first time, he opened up to her, crying his eyes out over what he wasn't exactly sure. He had been so close to losing it all: his soul, his redemption, his friends-and Willow.

"Wi-Wil-low.S-so s-s-sor-ry. So much.fail.Couldn't s-save her." His speech was fragmented; Willow shushed him and cradled his large upper body in her own, stroking his hair and calming him with the grace of a long-experienced mother.

"Shh.It's okay. Just wait a minute to get all put together."

The two held each other close to the point that, soon, they seemed as one. No demon leaving the bar dared to interfere with their tender moment.
 

read the sequal 'Calming the Storm'

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