Website: www.magical-worlds.us/emmy/
Pairing: Willow/Angel
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: I own nothing and seek no profit from this story. Joss Whedon et. al. owns everything BtVS and AtS. No copyright infringement intended.
Distribution: Emerald Illusions, the usual lists and websites. All others please ask first.
Summary: A surprising encounter between Angel and Willow after they both leave Giles’ flat on Thanksgiving (ep. Pangs) sets something into motion that neither one of them expected, and changes both of their futures drastically.
Warnings: Spoilers for BtVS Season 4 episodes up to and including Pangs, AU from there. Spoilers for AtS episodes up to and including I Will Remember You, AU from mid-episode IWRY.
Feedback: Yes, please. It makes me all happy-like.
A/N: Please note now: This is a Willow/Angel story. That said, there will be elements of it that are heavily Angel/Buffy. Also, this fanfic will go very AU from about midway through I Will Remember You.
Thank you to my betas, Gabrielle and Kat, for your extra hard work on this fic. (And for putting up with me when I lost the damn thing…)
Very special thanks to Gabrielle for inspiring this story with her PWP prompt that turned into a series. =)
On with the story.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
~Chapter One~ Sexy Enough
Willow sighed heavily as she walked down the deserted street. She knew she should have been on her way back to the dorm, but she really and truly was not in the mood to listen to Buffy whine about Angel yet again. She knew it was very hypocritical of her, seeing as she’d cried on Buffy’s shoulder plenty of times since Oz left, but Willow wasn’t stupid. She was well aware of the fact that all of her friends had long gotten over the ‘we’re here for you, Will,’ stage and had moved on to the wanting her to ‘just get over it’ stage.
Part of Willow knew that her friends were right in thinking that she did need to get over Oz. But the thing was ... she already had. What her friends didn’t understand was that she was over Oz and his cheating ways. It was the fact that she wasn’t good enough, wasn’t pretty enough, wasn’t sexy enough, or even witch enough to keep a man around that had her moping around all the time. So, for Willow, the very idea of listening to yet another round of Buffy insisting that she and Angel were soul-mates just left her cold. In the witch’s opinion, it was Buffy, who could get any guy she wanted, that needed to ‘just get over it.’
Willow sighed again as she thought about how lucky the blond Slayer was. Buffy complained all the time about how hard, how horrible, her life was, but all Willow could see were all the ways the other girl had lucked out. She had a mother who loved her, who was always there for her, and never left her alone for weeks on end to fend for herself. The Slayer strength she retained was not unstable like Willow’s own magick ... Buffy didn’t have to concentrate to call on and use her powers. They were just there. Not to mention, Willow mused, the fact that Buffy was one of the most beautiful girls she’d ever seen, and practically had guys falling over themselves to please her.
Willow ran a mental list of all the guys she’d known who’d wanted the blond. Xander, and even Jesse had wanted Buffy as soon as they saw her. Neither of her childhood friends noticed her. Well, Xander had, eventually … but that had turned out badly and that, Willow reminded herself, was so not the point. The point was, Buffy was always chosen over nearly all other girls. Angel had been one of them, obviously. Then Owen ... who Willow had secretly liked, too. Angel again. Oh, and Devon. Percy, even. Then there was Scott from their senior year. Angel ... again. Parker. Riley. Oh and, of course, Angel. It always came back to Angel. Other boys may have played the best friend card over the years, trying to get to Buffy by going through her, but in the end, Willow knew that Angel always got in the way of their advances.
‘And that,’ Willow thought as she walked along. ‘Is exactly why I don’t want to go back to the dorm right now.’
It would be ‘Angel-this’ and ‘Angel-that’ ... and every single bit of it would be something Willow had heard before. Buffy was a broken record when it came to her ex-boyfriend, and the witch knew that if she went back to the room, not once would her friend ask if *she* was doing okay. It would all have to be about Buffy. And Willow was kinda sick of being shoved aside by her friends. Willow was kinda sick of all of them trying to tell her, albeit politely, that she needed to get over Oz. Just once, she wished that one of them would see that it wasn’t <b>Oz</b> that was bothering her and ask her what was really wrong. But, Willow reminded herself, for them to do that, they’d have to actually pay attention to her for longer than a few minutes at a time.
“You know,” a familiar voice called out, “for someone who knows how this town really works, you’re sure going out of your way to make yourself an inviting meal.”
Willow whirled around. “Speak of the devil!”
Angel blinked once, then twice before asking, “What?”
Willow just shook her head. “Oh no! Don’t you ‘what’ me, mister. Not when you know perfectly well what ‘what’ I’m referring to.”
“Did you even breathe when you said that? Even once?” Angel asked.
“What does it matter to you if I breathe or not when I’m talking?” Willow snapped. “You don’t have to breathe at all when you talk. Or ever, even. You don’t have to breathe at all.”
“Willow,” Angel began, “are you mad at me?”
She felt her eyes widen at his question. “Mad? Mad at you? Why no, Angel! Why on earth would I be mad at you? You just swept into town, helped save the day, swore us all to secrecy about it when you know, you know we aren’t the kind of group that can keep secrets well, and then just leave. You ... you just leave! Right when she finds out you were here, you just ... why are you still here? I mean, I’m supposed to be back at the dorm room listening to Buffy’s ‘woe is me’ speech because you were in town and didn’t talk to her, and you’re supposed to be in LA. Why are you still here?”
Angel was silent for a long time, his own eyes rather wide, and Willow watched in mild astonishment as he took what appeared to be a breath. Her mouth fell open and she pointed at him. “Did you just breathe? You did! You took a breath! But ... you’re a vampire! And didn’t we just go over this? Vampire’s don’t breathe!”
“Willow, could you just, for a minute, not talk? Please?”
She pressed her lips together and nodded, determined to do as he asked. But, as he did it again, the breathing thing, her eyes widened and she heard herself make some sort of little ‘mhmhm” sound as she once again pointed at the vampire. But still, she did not say a word. At least not until the sound of Angel’s laughter reached her ears. It took her a minute to realize that’s what she was hearing, having never heard the sound before, but once she figured it out, her mouth fell open and her eyes narrowed. “Hey!” she exclaimed. “Are you laughing at me?”
“Yes,” Angel stated.
“Why?”
“Because you’re adorable.”
Willow blinked. “What?”
Angel just shook his head. “Is it physically impossible for you to go a full minute without making a sound, or does it just seem that way?”
Her eyes narrowed again as she glared at him. “Butthead.”
“Ah, come on! It was an honest question! You have to admit, you have talked a hell of a lot since I walked up to you.”
“Yeah, well,” Willow mumbled. “You disturbed me. I was all ... lost in thought, and stuff.”
“I noticed. Dangerously lost in thought. You had about four vampires stalking you.”
“I did?”
He nodded. “Yeah.”
“Oh.”
“Wanna tell me why you were so lost in thought?”
Willow scrunched up her nose. “I thought I already did.”
“The whole Buffy knows I’m here, or was here, and is upset thing?”
“Yeah.”
“Doesn’t really explain it.”
“Oh.”
Angel held out his arm. “Come on. We’ll go talk somewhere that is not in the middle of the street.”
Hesitating only for a second, Willow took his arm. “Okay, but I don’t want to go back to the dorms, and my parents are actually supposed to be getting home tonight. I think. I have a hard time keeping up with them.”
Angel just nodded. “Okay. I know a place we can go.”
Willow nibbled on her bottom lip as they began to walk down the street. “Angel?”
“Yeah?”
“Were you breathing?”
“I was sighing.”
She considered that for a second before smiling. “Nifty.”
***
Looking around the small apartment, Willow realized that it was the first time she’d ever been to Angel’s place. She’d sent Xander after him once ... when Giles’ demon had possessed Ms. Calendar, but she’d never actually been there herself. It was nice, she decided. Simple, but nice. Angel just smiled softly when she said so, and murmured a thank you before offering her something to drink. He only had wine, though, so she turned him down, and they settled onto the couch into an unsurprisingly uncomfortable silence.
“So...” Angel said finally.
“Right. Okay. I’ll start,” Willow said, remembering why he’d brought her home with him in the first place. “See, I was wandering around town because I didn’t want to go back to the dorm.”
“Why not? Willow, you know how danger-”
“Angel, please don’t. You’re right. I do know how dangerous Sunnydale is. And you’re also right in that it was stupid of me, but ... I have my reasons.”
He nodded slowly. “And they are?”
Willow took a deep breath and wondered if it was too late to accept a glass of that wine. “Well, it all started when I found out that Oz was cheating on me with this other werewolf ... a she-wolf.”
“What?” Angel demanded.
She shrugged. “Happened a few weeks ago.”
“Where is he?”
“Gone.”
Angel was silent and Willow looked up at him. The vampire, she noticed, had his eyes closed and his jaw clenched, and the expression on his face was much like Giles’ had been when she’d told him about Oz’s behavior. Only ... different somehow. Willow sighed. “I’m okay. I mean, he cheated on me, so clearly, he wasn’t good enough for me. But ... the thing is, Buffy and Xander, they expect me to be over it already, you know? They expect me to be back to my normal, perky, happy-go-lucky self, and I’m just not ... there yet.”
“They shouldn’t expect you to be.”
Willow felt herself smile softly. “Thank you for saying that. But really, I am over Oz. I mean, things weren’t great between us, hadn’t been for a while, so ... that part I’m over. It’s other things that I’m having trouble dealing with. But that’s neither here nor there. The reason I didn’t want to go back to the dorm tonight was, um, because of you.”
“Me?” Angel asked, shocked.
Willow nodded. “Yeah, see, ever since you and Buffy broke up, I’ve been the one that she turns to ... and I don’t mind, I mean, she’s my best friend. I’m glad she trusts me enough to tell me stuff but, it’s just not fair, or doesn’t seem fair, for her to be subtly telling me to get over the Oz thing one minute and then crying on my shoulder over you the next when it’s been months since you two broke up and weeks since Oz and I did.”
Angel blinked. “No, that’s not fair. That’s not fair at all.”
Willow shrugged. “I’ll be okay. But ... anyway, that’s why I was wandering the streets of Sunnydale at night lost in thought. Why are you still here?”
He looked around the room. “I wanted to make sure this place was still livable for one thing, but I also knew I’d barely beat the sun back to L.A. ... didn’t want to take the chance of running into trouble and being delayed.”
“Makes sense. Xander’s the one who blabbed, for the record. He didn’t mean to. It just slipped out.”
“I knew it would come out eventually. I just hoped I’d be gone before it did.”
“She thinks you’re gone now.”
“Good.”
“You really don’t want to see her?”
“No, I don’t.”
Willow was silent for a long time. Part of her wanted to know why, and part of her just didn’t care. She was glad Angel seemed to be moving on and she wished that Buffy would do the same. Slowly, she looked over at Angel and met his eyes. “So ... Cordelia’s really working for you, huh?”
He chuckled. “It’s not that bad. Really. She’s still the same Cordelia, but she’s more bearable now for some reason. I can’t really explain it.”
“Her parents lost all their money ... they cheated the government out of a lot of taxes ... she’s broke and has been for about a year. That changes a person.”
Angel blinked. “I didn’t know that.”
Willow shrugged. “I didn’t either. Well, not until it was in the paper. She did a really great job of keeping it quiet. I wouldn’t have known if I didn’t make a habit of reading all of the paper, including the legal notices.”
He nodded. “I may have to give her that raise she’s always after now.”
Willow giggled. “She’d just blow it on shoes.”
“Well, yeah,” Angel said. “But I’d feel better about myself.”
"Did Giles thank you?" Willow asked suddenly, changing the subject. "For coming up to warn us? 'Cause really ... thank you."
He looked over at her, an odd look on his face. "Why wouldn't I warn you, Willow? You are my friends."
She smiled softly. "Yeah, but still, thanks, Angel."
"You're welcome," he replied. "What other issues?"
"Huh?"
He turned so that they were facing each other. "You said you were still working through some issues with your break up. What issues?"
"Oh," Willow blushed. "That."
She closed her eyes. No one knew. Not a single one of her friends knew the real reason Oz left. They all thought it was so he could get his head on straight, so he could figure out what he wanted out of life, gain some control over his wolf. But really, it had been for the same reason he'd cheated on her in the first place. It had been for the same reason Xander had wanted Cordelia back so badly after he and Willow had been caught kissing instead of wanting to try to make a relationship with the hacker work. It was why no one, not one single guy, ever wanted to date mousy, little Willow Rosenberg. She couldn't satisfy a man. Or werewolf. Or, she was absolutely positive, anything else, either.
"Willow?" Angel asked softly.
"I'm not pleasing." Her eyes were closed. She couldn't look at him, couldn't see the knowing pity in his eyes.
"What?"
She couldn't believe she'd actually said it, but now that she had started speaking, she found that she didn't want to stop. It was like she had to tell someone, and Angel was someone. "I couldn't make him happy, make Oz happy, you know ... sexually."
Willow felt the couch shift and kept her eyes shut tight, sure that Angel was leaving the room, trying to get away from her before he started laughing, so he wouldn't embarrass her further. It wasn't until she felt his hands on her shoulders that she realized she might be wrong.
"Willow," he said softly. "Look at me."
She opened her eyes slowly and knew there were tears pooling inside her eyelids. Angel's brown eyes stared back at her and she swallowed hard at the emotion she saw in them. Unreadable emotion, yes, but it was very clear that Angel was emotional about something. His hands tightened on her shoulders as he asked, "Did Oz tell you that?"
She shook her head. "He didn't have to."
"What do you mean?"
"Well," she said, as the first tear spilled over her cheek. "From the beginning he didn't want me ... there had to be an apocalypse before he actually slept with me, but Oz isn't the only guy. There was Xander ... he never wanted me, not really. And no one else ever even looks at me. It's like I'm invisible."
"You are not invisible."
"How can you say that?" Tears streaming down her cheeks now, Willow realized that she wouldn't have been able to stop crying even if Buffy and the rest of the gang suddenly burst through the door with a huge batch of chocolate chip cookies declaring that she could take all the time she needed to work through her problems. She just needed to cry.
Angel pulled her to him, placing her head on his shoulder, saying, "I can say that because I see you. I've seen you for years. Since before Buffy even came to Sunnydale, since before you even knew I existed, Willow, I've seen you."
Wrapping her arms around him even as her mind told her to reject his words, Willow sobbed into his shoulder. Angel held onto her tightly until she had cried her last tear and then lifted her up gently into his arms and carried her from the room to his bedroom, placing her on the bed. "Um, Angel?" Willow asked, softly.
"Just relax, Willow. I'll be right back."
A few minutes later, Angel returned carrying a glass of water and a handkerchief. Handing both of them to her, he said, "It's almost five am ... way too late for you to be walking back across town alone, and too early for me to walk you back and still make it back here before the sun comes up. I could drive you, but my car is in a lot near Giles' apartment."
Willow wiped at the remainder of her tears with her hand and took the water from him, sipping it slowly. "I can sleep on the couch."
"You'll sleep here. Blow your nose."
"I can't blow my nose on this! It's too old ... and pretty."
Angel grinned. "You're so twentieth century."
She scowled. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means," he said. "That in my day, no one -- man or woman -- thought of such things. You look at that piece of cloth and see an antique. I hear you sniffling and tell you to blow your nose."
Willow grinned despite herself. "Angel, you're so old."
He smiled again. "I don't deny it."
Turning her head, she did blow her nose, even though she didn't want to ruin the hanky, but she refused to give the cloth back to him. Wadding it up and stuffing it into the pocket of her jeans, she promised to return it, cleaned, within a week. Angel just shook his head and mumbled something about her age. Willow took another sip of her water and glanced at him. He was sitting, like she was, on the edge of the bed. "Thank you."
"For what?"
"Letting me cry."
"You seemed to have needed it."
"I did."
"You're welcome, then. But ... Willow, for the record, what I said was true."
"Angel," she said softly. "You don't have to do that. You don't have to placate me. I'm a big girl. That issue you asked me about? The one I'm having trouble working through? This is it. I may be having a hard time dealing with the fact that I won't ever be able to make a man happy, but I will eventually deal with it."
A soft growl escaped Angel's throat and Willow's eyes widened. "Angel?"
He was silent for a moment longer, but finally turned and met her eyes. His were tinged slightly yellow and Willow gaped at him. "Angel?"
"Willow, I am really gonna have to ask you not to make a comment like that again. I disagree with what you just said, fully disagree, but Angelus ... his cage is rattling."
"What?"
"You really have no idea, do you?"
"What are you talking about, Angel?"
The vampire stood up and walked over to kneel in front of her. He gazed up at Willow and placed his hands on the bed on either side of her. His thumbs brushed against her thighs, and Willow started a bit as a jolt of ... something ... ran through her at the contact. "Angel?"
“I saw you. Three weeks before school let out for Christmas break in 1995 … about a month before Buffy came to Sunnydale. It was three days after I’d arrived in town. You were walking in between Xander and some other boy and I heard you laughing. It was like music, Willow, and it called to me. Me and Angelus both. We both saw you that night.”
“Angelus … Angel, you talk about him like he’s another person.”
"He is, in a way," the vampire answered. "He's my demon, Willow. He's always with me. Constantly. The fact that I have a soul doesn't change that. Over the years I've just sort of separated the two of us in my mind. I don't talk about it much because it tends to freak people out, knowing that he's always there, watching, listening, feeling what I feel."
Willow was silent for a long time, absorbing what Angel had just revealed. She reached out suddenly, running a finger down his arm. "So you both feel this?"
"Yes," Angel said softly.
"And when you drink, you both taste the blood. When you save a life, you both save the life. And when you kill, be it a demon or a vampire, or whatever, you both kill."
Angel nodded. "Exactly."
"That doesn't freak me out, Angel. It actually makes it easier to understand you ... to understand why you do some of the things you do, make some of the decisions you make."
He looked at her, then back at her finger as it slowly ran up and down his arm, before meeting her eyes again. "Really?"
She nodded. "Yes. He influences you, and no matter if he likes it or not, you influence him. Am I right?"
Angel's eyes brightened slightly. "Yes, you are."
Willow smiled. "So you saw me? God, I was ... barely 16 then. I'd just turned 16, actually, a few days before then. I was such a nerd."
"Maybe a little bit, yeah," he said with a smile. "But, Willow, you've got to understand, your innocence, your intelligence, that fire you try so hard to hide inside of yourself, it calls to a vampire. It called to me that night. I don't expect you to really understand, but you were infectious. It was like we were drawn to you. Your smile, your laugh, your beauty ... Willow, you were intoxicating."
She shook her head. "No. I don't believe you. You're just saying that so that I'll feel better."
Willow watched as Angel closed his eyes, watched as he seemed to struggle with something internally for a moment before he looked at her once more. "Willow, I'm not just saying this. Any of it."
She blinked, amazed at the truth she saw in his eyes. She didn't want to believe him; it was almost painful to hope that she could. Disappointment was something she was familiar with, but sweet words were not ... she closed her own eyes. "Angel..."
"Angelus wanted me to approach you," Angel said softly. "He whispered in my ear the entire night as we watched you having fun at the Bronze with your friends. But I never did what he wanted me to then, and I didn't even manage to find out your name that night. My soul weighed too heavily on me in those days, influenced more than it does now. I would have, approached you, if I hadn't felt so guilty for even looking at you, at your innocence. But when we, Angelus and I, found out that you were one of Buffy's friends ... Willow, never doubt that we saw you. That I saw you, because I did."
Her eyes wide now, Willow had no idea what to say. She licked her lips as Angel's hands moved from the bed to rest on her thighs, and she didn't wonder at all how her hands ended up on his shoulders. Their eyes locked together, Willow couldn't help but notice the honesty she still saw in Angel's gaze. The intensity, the almost smoldering heat that was burning in his eyes as he stared at her, made it impossible to look away.
"It may have been Buffy who I dated, who I loved, but Willow," Angel said. "Buffy gave me what the soul needed, she gave me every chance to better myself and saw me for the vampire I could be not the vampire I was, and she's a Slayer. I can't explain how much that influenced what happened between the two of us. But, through it all, I saw you. If things had been different, if I had met you later, after I had worked on my redemption some, if I was to meet you for the first time now ... things would be different."
Willow gasped softly at his admission and shook her head in denial. "You don't mean that, Angel. Buffy is, she's your soul-mate."
"Buffy and I have something special, I will say that. And you're right. I do love her. I probably always will. But she and I can never be together, Willow. I see that now. And I'm not saying that you and I could be, either, but ... hell, I don't know what I'm saying."
Willow smiled softly, despite the conflicting emotions she felt building inside of her chest. "Oh, I know what you're saying, Angel. I get it. You're trying to make me feel better. You're a really great guy, a great friend, and believe me, it's working. I feel better. But ... you don't have to pretend you feel something for me when you don't. That's not necessary."
Angel's hands tightened on her thighs. "Feel something I don't? Willow, I'm being more honest, saying more to you, than I ever said to Buffy. Don't you understand that? This openness is hard for me, and believe me Angelus is downright laughing his ass off at me for being such a ... well, a girl. But I can't seem to stop saying things, this stuff, because you have to understand. I need you to understand."
She sucked her bottom lip into her mouth. "Understand what?"
"How much you mean to me," Angel answered. "How much you mean to both me and my demon, Willow."
Her hands instinctively tightening on Angel's shoulders, Willow's heart soared at the very idea that he might be serious, really serious, about what he was saying. "Really?" she asked softly.
"The day that invisible girl locked you, Xander, and Giles up in the boiler room?" Angel reminded her. "I wanted to carry you home, bring you here, make sure you were okay ... see to it myself, instead of leaving you in Giles' hands. When the Anointed One kidnapped you? I wanted to snap his thin little neck in half. I could list all of the times I wanted to kill for you, but I won't. Willow, even after you gave Angelus his soul back, he didn't hate you. He respected you for having the courage to not only attempt it, but succeed. That's not saying he's happy to be locked back up in the cage, but, well, maybe you get what I'm saying."
She nodded. "I think so. You and he feel protective of me."
Angel held her gaze. "Yes, but it is more than that. We are also attracted to you, always have been, since that first night. I know you don't want to believe it, but it's true. The night of the prom ... when I showed up to give Buffy her one damned perfect high school moment? I remember seeing you, dancing with Oz, and thinking that you looked absolutely beautiful. I remember hoping that Oz knew how lucky he was. And now that I know he didn't ... hell, Willow, that pisses me off."
"Angel..."
"I bought you a gift," he said suddenly.
She blinked. "What?"
Angel seemed as surprised at his revelation as Willow was. "Um ... after I got back from hell. I bought you a little something ... for giving me back my soul. Buffy, she um, found it before I could give it to you and ... well-"
"Oh," Willow said, surprised at how disappointed she was at the fact that Buffy had gotten her gift. "That's okay. It's the thought that counts."
"It was a butterfly. A little butterfly necklace. I've never seen Buffy wear it. I don't think she likes it too much."
Willow blinked again. "I love butterflies."
"I know."
"You ... know?"
Angel's hands were running casually up and down her thighs now, and Willow couldn't bring herself to mind. Slowly, she began to trail her hands over his back, her fingertips brushing along the soft material of his shirt. "I know a lot about you, Willow," he said softly.
"Did you really think I looked beautiful at the prom?"
He leaned up so that he could look into her eyes, closer than he had been. "You're beautiful all the time, Willow. I thought I had gotten that point across."
She shook her head slowly. "No, I-"
Angel's lips covered hers suddenly, without warning, and Willow gasped. Her hands tightening into fists, bunching up the material of Angel's shirt, as she tried to figure out if she should pull away or kiss him back. Her mind was screaming at her to push him away, but her heart was telling her to return his kiss ... telling her that he thought she was beautiful, reminding her of all the wonderful things he'd just told her. Her emotions in turmoil, Willow gave up the fight and moaned when she felt Angel's tongue teasing her lips. Opening her mouth without further hesitation, she began to kiss him back.
Angel kissed her gently, his lips soft and full, his tongue dancing with hers, as he pushed her back onto the bed. Willow wrapped her legs around him as he moved them up to the head of the bed, placing her on a pillow. Losing herself to the kiss, Willow didn’t protest at all when Angel began un-tucking her t-shirt and tried tugging it over her head. She broke the kiss and sat up just long enough for him to get it off, and never once did she question what they were doing. It felt right, somehow, to be there with him in that moment. Nothing mattered but the two of them, and no one was in the room with them -- physically or emotionally. Somehow, Willow was absolutely positive about that.
She heard Angel groan as she thrust her hips against him and grinned up at him. “You are a really good kisser, sir.”
“Got you to be quiet for longer than a minute, too ... I think I can consider it an accomplishment.”
“Ack!” Willow exclaimed. “I think I should be offended!”
“I think,” Angel said, “you should help me get this damn bra off, shut up, and start kissing me again.”
“Having trouble with the hooks?” she teased.
“There are no hooks.”
Willow rolled her eyes and batted Angel’s hands away from her body. “You are so eighteenth century.”
The snap was in the front, and Willow smiled as Angel’s eyes widened a little when she unhooked her bra without hesitation. “Willow...”
“Angel...”
It was only then, when she was kneeling before him half naked, that doubt began to seep into her mind. She was, after all, fooling around with her best friend’s so-called soul-mate and he didn’t seem to be thinking of her at all. “What about Buffy?” she asked suddenly.
He held her gaze. “Buffy isn’t here, Willow, and I have wanted this, wanted you, for a long, long time.”
“Are you sure?” she asked. “I mean, your soul...”
Angel swept her into his arms and began kissing her once more, his tongue slipping into her mouth leaving Willow slightly dizzy and lightheaded with passion. “My soul will be just fine, sweet girl. All we’re going to have is a little taste ... nothing more, nothing less.”
“Ohhh,” Willow said, her voice coming out on a moan as his lips latched onto a particularly sensitive spot on her neck. “Don’t stop.”
Angel chuckled and the vibrations from it resounded through her body. “Wasn’t planning on it, Willow.”
Reaching out, Willow decided to let go of all her doubt and just give in, decided to just let herself have fun, let herself feel, and began to unbutton Angel’s shirt. Time slipped away from her then, as Angel’s body came into view for the first time, and she realized exactly how ... perfect he was. Sooner than she thought possible, she found herself on her back, completely naked, with an equally naked vampire kissing his way across her skin. She moaned as he took one of her breasts into his mouth, nipping and sucking gently at the sensitive bud. His hands we never still, roaming freely over her, and when he dipped a finger into her heat, Willow cried out, surprised. Angel’s lips found hers then, and he began to stroke her, his fingers strumming her clit as he made love to her mouth with his tongue. She arched into his hand, the fire within her growing more and more heated with every passing moment, and her arms went around him, holding him to her as she drew closer and closer to release.
“You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, Willow,” Angel whispered in her ear, his voice sounding more like Angelus’, she noticed. “All fire, passion, heat ... scorching my hand as I stroke you. I’d give nearly anything to be inside you, thrusting in and out of you, harder and harder, until we both came ... I’d make you mine, Willow, you know that, don’t you?”
Willow moaned, Angel’s whispered words fueling her passion, and she thrust against him harder, faster, needing more. As if he read her mind, he increased the speed of his strokes and the pressure he used. Willow felt her entire body tense and began to kiss Angel passionately. He kissed her back and seemed to double his efforts, flicking her clit from side to side as she writhed beneath him. As her orgasm washed over her, Willow broke their kiss and screamed out his name, her fingernails digging into his back as wave after wave of pleasure crashed through her.
Angel held her, let her cling to him, until she had calmed down, until every tremor had left her body, and then kissed her again, his lips moving easily against hers. Willow blinked up at him, unsure if she should thank him for giving her the best orgasm she’d ever had, or if she should let the laughter, the joy, that was bubbling up inside of her come out to play. Settling on a huge smile, she kissed him once more before pushing against his shoulder. “What?” he asked.
“Roll over.”
“Why?”
“Because ... damn it, Angel, just roll over.”
“Did you just cuss?”
She blushed. “Shut up.”
He rolled over and took her with him, a grin on his face. “I think I like this side of you.”
“The naked, wild side?”
“That’d be the one.”
She smiled brightly. “Well, good ... ‘cause I kinda like this side of you, too.”
Licking her lips as she gazed at his toned, gorgeous, very aroused body, Willow leaned forward and dragged her tongue down the center of his chest between his pectorals. Angel groaned her name and placed his hands on her hips, pulling her a bit closer. Willow grinned and kissed her way up his body, spending a moment at his lips before moving back down to his neck. She sucked on the faint scar she found there, her tongue lapping at the edges. “Fuck!” Angel exclaimed, his hand wrapping around her neck, holding her to him.
Continuing to tease the spot with her lips and tongue, Willow trailed a hand down his side and back up again, repeating the action several times. Angel groaned again and finally released the hold he had on her neck, allowing Willow access to his entire body once more.
Sitting up, Willow looked at him and tilted her head to the side. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Anything,” he said.
“Just then, when you were ... you know, um, with me and-”
“Making you come,” he stated with a grin.
Willow felt the blush spreading across her face, but ignored it. “Yeah. Then. And with the scar thing ... were you both there, in the moment? You and Angelus?”
Angel’s eyes widened slightly. “You could tell?”
Willow nodded slowly. “I could feel him, when you were touching me ... but I knew he wasn’t the only one there, if that makes sense at all. I knew you were there, too ... in control.”
He reached out quickly, grabbing her and pulling her down, kissing her hard. Willow kissed him back, stretching her body out above his, loving the way her skin felt against his. She could feel his erection, hard and ... huge, pressing into her, and she began to run her hands down his body as they continued to kiss. Trailing her fingers down his sides, she grinned into the kiss as he tensed, just a little. “You’re ticklish.”
“Am not.”
She ran her hands over his ribs again and was rewarded when he pulled back slightly and did his best not to laugh. She smiled brightly. “I swear I’ll never tell anyone.”
“You better not. I’ll have to torture you if you do.”
“Torture me? Would there be spanking involved?” Angel’s cock jumped against her skin then, and Willow arched an eyebrow. “Take it you like that idea?”
“You have no idea, Willow, and if you keep playing with fire...”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” she said, still grinning as she began to kiss her way down his body. “I’ll get burned. Well, maybe I want to get burned … just a little.”
Willow kissed her way down his torso, slipping a hand down to tease his erection, her fingertips grazing the tip and along the sides, before moving even further down to cup his balls. Angel thrust upward and growled softly, causing Willow to smile at the effect she seemed to have on him. Oz had never reacted this way to her touch. Things between them had certainly never been this playful, and it was a very nice change. Slowly, as she pushed all thoughts of her ex out of her mind, Willow lowered her head onto Angel’s cock and began to suck, gradually taking more and more of him into her mouth, until she could feel the tip of him at the back of her throat. Angel, though she knew he didn’t actually need to do it, seemed to be gasping for breath, and Willow slowly pulled off of him before repeating almost exactly what she’d just done, this time licking along the bottom of his shaft as she took him into her mouth.
“Willow ... god ... so good.”
Angel’s words of encouragement were all she needed, and Willow began to move faster, her head bobbing up and down on his cock, taking him in and out at a rapid pace. With one hand, she toyed with his balls, occasionally reaching behind them to press against or stroke his perineum, causing Angel to tremble slightly. She could tell he wanted to thrust into her mouth, could tell it was taking all of his strength not to, and she reached out with her other hand, finding his, and squeezed. He laced their fingers together as she continued to go down on him, crying out as she increased the amount of suction she used. “Willow ... I’m going to come-”
Sucking hard on the tip of his cock, Willow forced her throat to relax as she felt Angel’s balls tighten. He came, clutching her hand in his, her name spilling from his lips, and she swallowed as much as she could. He tasted better than Oz, sweeter, and Willow found that she quite liked the way Angel tasted. Licking her lips and cleaning him off of the small amount she didn’t catch, she smiled up at him when she saw him looking at her. “What?” she asked softly.
Angel squeezed her hand and dragged her up the bed, crushing his lips to hers, his tongue seeking hers out, and didn’t stop until she was breathless. “Amazing,” he said softly. “You are utterly amazing.”
“Angel, I ... you don’t -”
“And I am going to spend this entire damn day convincing you of that if I have to,” he interrupted. “Don’t tell me I don’t have to tell you that you are amazing. Willow, I meant it, what I said. If it wasn’t for the fact that I’m positive you would give me a moment of perfect happiness, I would make love to you over and over and over until neither one of us could walk. You are beautiful, wonderful, and don’t you think for one second that I didn’t enjoy that. You are ... perfect.”
Her eyes wide, Willow could only think to do one thing. She kissed him. And when Angel laid her back down on the bed and began to kiss his way down her body, she spread her legs without hesitation and moaned as he began to once again prove that she was all the things he said she was.
And, for those few hours, Willow believed. Angel made her believe.
next | back