WEBSITE: http://www.geocities.com/crushing983
PAIRING: W/A :-D
RATING: NC-17
SPOILERS: Season 2, some of 3
ARCHIVE: Please do, just tell me where it went!
DISCLAIMER: All BtVS and AtS characters belong to Joss Whedon and crew, except for Kate, and the characters in her ³world².
FEEDBACK: Yes, please! (Just use tact, and kind words, and no yelling, k?)
SUMMARY: What would happen if Angel ran into Willow after dropping out of Hell, instead of Buffy?
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~Part: 1~
Willow walked quietly through the park. It had been a long time since she had gone for a walk, not since before Angel had lost his soul. It just wasn't safe. And now, with him gone there anymore. *Besides* she reasoned, *It's not like Buffy'll be able to take me out...she's so wrapped up in Scott.*
She walked through the lush grass, pausing once to take her sandals off, so she could feel the grass between her toes. That was a sensation the hacker had grown quite fond of, now that she was able to walk again. It was even better when it rained. However, that particular night, it wasn't raining --- there wasn't even a cloud in the sky. It was warm, there was a slight breeze, the cool air ruffling her shorter hair.
As she walked, she thought about Angel. Since he disappeared, so many of her thoughts turned to Angel. She wondered if the spell worked, if she sent him to hell with his humanity, or if he's down there, evil as sin itself, repenting for the horrible things he's done. She had no idea, but she missed him, for the unspoken friendship they had. It was something quiet ones shared, they'd make eye contact, and recognize what they were going through. That was what Willow felt she and Angel had shared. Nothing more, although sometimes she wished he had chosen her, over Buffy. However, she knew she was fortunate to have fallen into a relationship with Oz. He cared for her a lot, and he made her feel very safe.
*Wait a minute.....* she turned her head, hearing a noise in the bushes that surrounded the park, unsure if she heard a 'creepy noise', or a 'normal noise'. It disappeared, and she relaxed. But, minutes later, she heard it again. *That was a creepy noise. Uh oh.*
In a flash of bare flesh, something jumped her. It smelled of nature, it growled, and flung her against the earth, dragging her into a secluded area. She couldn't see its face, but it looked so human!
She struggled to get away, but that seemed to make it more savage. It rolled her onto her back, and loomed up over her face.
Willow couldn't believe who she saw.
"Angel?"
~Part: 2~
She studied his face, contorted in a sheen of blood. His eyes were brown, not yellow, making her feel that he was torn which way he wanted to go, man or demon. Her eyes dropped. His chest was scarred, bare, still muscular. His wrists were badly damaged.
"Angel!"
He growled in reply, nuzzling her neck affectionately. He inhaled deeply in her hair, and then, started pressing his lips to various parts of her face, sometimes licking, something nibbling lightly with dull teeth.
"Angel?"
He straddled her, keeping her from going anywhere. She was still struggling, although now it was half-hearted. She had no idea what was going on. With strong hands, he tore her shirt from her body, and then her shorts. She was nude, except for flimsy white cotton underwear and bra. He growled, curled his lip, almost in a wild smile.
His intentions were so obvious to her after that. It scared her, but aroused her, too. Angel had changed so much. Hell had been, well, hell on his soul. She felt horrible. But, she didn't have much time to feel horrible. His hands touched her, his knee pressed against her sex, which was starting to moisten. She found herself pressing down on him, hoping for some sort of friction, but he pulled away, and clawed at the underthings, shredding them, and tossing them into the woods.
"Angel?" She tried again, but with no avail. His eyes unnerved her. He was taking in her form with hungry eyes. And then, he entered her. She cried out, "Angel!" It hurt so much, but as the pain slipped, she felt better. He was being such an animal! It was a primitive urge he was feeling out, she had no idea what was going on, her mind so disconnected from her body, as they both wanted different things. He nipped at her skin constantly, breaking it in some places, to suck the blood, but, it wasn't until they climaxed that she lost much blood.
Fangs sunk into her neck, she screamed out against him, and then whimpered, scared that if she screamed so loud again Buffy or Xander would hear her, and that would be it for both of them. Angel would be staked, and Willow exiled. She shuddered underneath him, as the muscle contractions finished. It was he that whimpered when it was finished, nuzzling against the fresh wound on her neck.
She sighed, leaning into his chest, her voice a whisper. "Angel......"
~Part: 3~
When she woke up the next morning, she found herself in bed. In her bed. At home. The french doors were wide open, though, leading her to believe that it was Angel that dropped her off. She was still nude, her shredded clothes on the porch.
She stretched, and fell back against her pillows. *Angel.....oh goddess. What did I do?* she smiled, thinking about it, *Angel and I.....made lo-- no, it was more like we mated. It was so incredible.*
Then the phone rang. The moment of afterglow was ruined.
"Hello?"
"Willow?!" It was Buffy, "Where were you last night!? You didn't meet us at the Bronze!"
*Bronze? What? I thought I was walking last night.*
The hacker responded casually, "I didn't want to intrude on the couples. Third wheel and all."
"Oz was waiting for you."
"I thought he wasn't---" she stopped short, remembering their conversation, their decision of going to the Bronze. They did make plans to meet there. She felt a wave of guilt wash over her, "Buffy, I'm sorry."
The slayer responded, "Oz was worried. More so than usual. It was his last night, and all, too."
"I'll visit today," she decided out loud, "Thanks for bringing me back to earth. I went for a walk last night, and I kinda got lost in it."
She laughed, "That's my Wills."
*Yeah, right.*
~Part: 4~
With Oz locked up, Willow felt that she could go out to the park again. This time, she hoped to see Angel, she even prepared for it by wearing clothes she didn't care about. She walked and walked, having to dodge Buffy once by hiding in the bushes, but she didn't see Angel, her wild animal of the night.
But, she did see another vampire.
It prepared to attack her, saying how cute she was, and how lovely she'd be to eat. Willow was too upset, and she wanted to scream, but she couldn't. Fear rooted her firmly in one place. His hands grasped her body, and she thought she'd be sick, and then she wanted to cry because she'd be found dead in such a hideous outfit.
And then, she was knocked to the ground.
She crawled back, to watch Angel defend her. He roared and growled, and the vampire's neck was broken, consequently the demon turned to dust.
Her vampire moved quickly to her tiny form, her arms wrapped around her, his forehead pressed against hers. After their embrace, the oddest thing happened: Angel burst into tears, sobbing her name out over and over. The first words he had said to her since they met. She didn't know what to do, just holding him, comforting him with her warmth, and when he looked into her eyes, she kissed him. When she did this, she knew part of the beast in him was disappearing. It would be so long, before he returned to himself, but he needed her.
With a concerned touch, he kissed and sucked her skin, but stopped when he sniffed the air. He picked her up, and took her into the woods, and then to the mansion. She saw Buffy's ring, and a sooty mess on the floor, that resembled the outline of a human form. He kissed her again, and this time, the sex was much more tender.
He held her differently, and there was much less growling. He didn't talk, not even to mention her name, grunts were all he could muster. It seemed, to her, that he would never be the same. Just a wild animal. She was scared. Scared for him, that someday Xander or Buffy would find him, or even Giles, and that they wouldn't understand him, and kill him. Scared for her that he might forget she was only human, and he could hurt her, or that he'd get sick of her, and kill her, maybe not meaning to, but maybe it could be his intention.
After they finished, he curled up around her; they fell alseep. Willow only woke up once, to hear him dreaming. He was sobbing and whining in his sleep. *Poor Angel.* She kissed his forehead gently. Even though the situation was scary, she didn't want to leave.
~Part: 5~
"What do you want to do tonight, Wills?"
She shrugged, her mind disconnected since Angel left, two months ago. After the two nights of togetherness, he left, taking off into the woods, leaving her in the mansion. She never returned, she never walked at night. Angel wanted privacy, or something. She hoped he was alright, she prayed for him every chance available.
"Willow?"
"Sorry, Buffy," she smiled, "I'm just thinking."
The slayer smiled, "You've been thinking for, I think, two months!" she looked at the redhead tenderly, "I worry about you. You go out with us, but you'll sulk, and if you don't go out, we never hear from you. It's been so long since you've smiled."
"I haven't been---"
A voice, a voice she had wished to hear for so long, called out, from across the street, "Willow!" The girls turned; Angel, dressed in his leather jacket, white t-shirt, and black pants, was walking towards them. Buffy was speaking to Willow, about how angry she was that he didn't recognize her, but the hacker didn't hear her. The smile on her face grew, as her heart swelled, to see him well, and then she got up, and ran to him. He wrapped himself around her in a strong embrace, "I missed you so much!"
"Angel...." she whispered, in a voice that was as soft as his had been, "It's so good to feel you again."
Buffy appeared behind them, "What's going on?"
They managed to convince Buffy that Angel had been rescued by Willow without telling her details, with a little lie that entailed her casting a spell; and then, they ended up in his new apartment. She wanted to hear so much about what had happened to him, and why he chose her, and he promised to explain it to her, but when they were alone.
"Willow," he smiled, "Would you like a glass of water?"
She nodded, "Yes, please," she added, "It doesn't get you out of explaining things to me, though."
When he returned with the glass, he sat down next to her, careful not to put too little a space between them, "I am so sorry for involving you in this."
"Just be honest," she soothed, "I mean, I was a little shocked. I wasn't thinking rationally, I---"
"I didn't give you a choice."
"I enjoyed it, Angel," she admitted, sipping her water, avoiding eye contact, "When you disappeared, I realized how much I missed you, and when you, um, found me in the park......Angel, you are important to me."
He spoke softly, "You are important to me," he started, "I never understood Buffy, the way I understood you. I always felt we were cut from the same cloth," she nodded, knowing exactly what he was saying, "The quiet ones. You know?" She nodded taking his hand in hers, while he continued, "I came out of hell, and I needed humanity. An anchor. Someone to depend on. I didn't know where I'd be if it wasn't for you. I only wish I never took advantage of you like that. It was just, when I saw you, and smelled you," he smiled at her, forcing eye contact, "Do you know you smell so good?"
"No," she laughed, "I had no idea."
"I was an animal, Willow, I had been down there for what seemed like hundreds of years, and I was nothing like myself."
"I know."
"I'm so sorry."
She slapped his arm, "Stop it. You brood entirely too much. Keep explaining."
He nodded, "Taking you so selfishly helped me remember things. I really didn't even know who yuo were, no offense," he managed to try a joke, "But, the second night, I knew you. Things fit into place. I saw you trapped, and I freaked out. Everything hit me after we were together that night, all these memories of my life hitting me so hard. That's why I left, mostly."
"The other reason?"
The vampire admitted more truthful confessions, "I didn't want to keep using you like that. I couldn't hurt you, Willow."
She looked at him, all of her wamrth and affection for him evident; she sighed, "I'm so glad you're okay. You made me worry so much," she reached out and touched his cheek, "I worried for days, that someone would hurt you, and you'd get burnt.....I cried over it. Angel! It makes me so happy to know you're alright."
"I feel better now," he smiled back at her, "Knowing you're okay."
"I'm so glad you're back," she wrinkled her nose, "We won't ever tell them, will we?"
He shook his head, "Not unless yuo want to."
"Good," she laughed shakily, brushing herself off as nothing more than someone in second place, "because you're lack ofmental sanity, well...."
"What do you mean?"
She explained the way she saw it, "I just assumed you went crazy. I mean, the first time, that was okay, a slipup. But the second?"
"Willow!" he seemed shocked, "You have no idea!" she whimpered, he clasped her hands, "Willow when I saw you....I was so attracted to you, my instincts were on overload!" she looked away, he was making her nervous, "I wanted you that first night, I wanted you the second night, when I realized who you were, and," he lifted her head, by cupping her chin, to pull her eyes to his, "I still want you now."
She trembled, "Angel, are you sure?"
He nodded, and kissed her once, pulling back to study her response, "I only regret that I took advantage of you so selfishly, Willow, I---" she cut him off, pressing her lips to his, the sexual frustration and built up confusion clearly evident in her actions. When she pulled back, he said, "I could only think of you....I only want you...." he kissed her jaw, "Need you."
"Hmmmmm," she could only hum, as she studied him. He thought she was in a trance, and she felt as though she was, until she had a startling thought, "I'm only Willow!"
"Only?" he stiffled his laughter, "Willow! You are a goddess! You smell of vanilla, sometimes lilacs and roses! You have this endless compassion and endless love for everyone you meet. I want to talk with you, about real things, and feel the heat in our conversation! I want you to show me what I've missed.....I want to experience so much, and share it all with you," he bowed his head, "If you'll let me."
She felt like crying, "I--- oh goddess! Angel?"
He kissed her cheek, "Willow."
The tears finally fell, her eyes becoming fountains of joy and sorrow. She started to cry, the sobs were soft, "Please....oh, please," she repeated it over and over, like she was begging him, "Make sure this is what you want, Angel. I don't want to be hurt."
His lips made a trail across her face, before he spoke, "I don't want to hurt you ever again."
"Please.......please......." she kept on crying, "Please don't rush this. It's too beautiful a moment. I've never had this, I---"
Instinctively, his arms wrapped around her, he rocked her back and forth, "You will have this moment, and many more, Willow. I promise you. You saved my soul, and I will never be able to repay you for that."
The End