Rating: NC-17-ish
Disclaimer: I humbly borrow, twisting and bending plots to my will.
Summary: What if Buffy hadn't gone to LA after Pangs, when Angel became human?
Archived at: www.geocities.com/seeing_reddd Want? Take. Have...just let me know where it's going:)
Spoilers: Pangs and I Will Remember You
Super big thank you to Heather for being willing to rip me apart when I beg...you help make me better:)
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~Part: 1~
Human. He couldn't believe it. After over two and a half centuries, suddenly he could taste and smell and hear like he never had before. He could feel his heartbeat, pumping the blood through his veins, and though some of his senses were duller for lack of vampire enhancement, Angel thought that the sudden glories of humanity more than made up for it. He got it now. He got why Cordelia went so nuts over certain foods, and there were so many things that he couldn't wait to try. They didn't even HAVE ice cream when he was alive. Sure, he had tried the yogurt, and that wasn't so good, but at least now he got to find out for himself.
Angel was on top of the world. He didn't care WHY or HOW he had gotten this gift. The only thing that mattered to him was that he had it. He had been fighting a demon, killing it, and then suddenly, he felt it…his heartbeat. Plain and simple, Angel was alive. He was a living, breathing human being, and he figured it was safe to say that at that moment, he was the happiest one on the planet.
`Welcome to Sunnydale.' God, that sign had never looked so sweet. His smile broadened as his car sped through the city limits, bringing him that much closer to the one girl that he couldn't wait to share his news with. It was still bright out, though the sun would be setting in a just a few short hours. Angel had gone back and forth a dozen times about whether or not to come here and tell Buffy about his new-found mortality. What if it wasn't permanent? What if she didn't care? What if she had moved on? So many concerns plagued his mind, the biggest of which was that nagging feeling that HE might have moved on. He wasn't quite willing to admit that to himself just yet. After all, Buffy WAS the love of his unlife… Unlife…as in, his past life…When he wasn't truly living.
Shaking the thoughts away, he continued to head toward the college. They had just been apart for too long, and he had spent too many nights brooding in the dark, drilling it into his head that she could never be his. Angel knew that the minute he saw her, though, it would all come flooding back. It always did, and he figured that it always would.
Pulling up to the building, he jumped out of the convertible, reveling in the feeling of the sun on his face, and practically skipped his way up to the door, throwing it open with a bright smile and heading in.
~*~
Country music. The music of pain. Willow remembered Xander suggesting once that listening to copious amounts of country music would help to ease the pain of heartache. She had listened to a whole heaping earfull, and though she thought that she now thoroughly understood the pain of your drunken letch boyfriend loving his truck more than you, she didn't feel any closer to finding resolution on her abandonment. Oz was gone, and Willow was still as mopey as ever. She was trying to keep the moping to a minimum, and indulged mostly when she was alone in her room. Of course, that was more and more frequent these days, what with Buffy seeing Riley, and Xander seeing Anya, and Giles seeing…whoever it was that Giles was off seeing. Everyone seemed to have a someone except her, and the redhead knew that it was the sheer loneliness and feeling of being unwanted that hurt as much as the loss of Oz itself. Maybe even more so. After all, it wasn't as if his leaving was all THAT sudden. She had gotten a sense that things had been changing, shifting. Willow hated change. It made people leave, and it left her feeling empty and alone.
Hearing a knock at the door, Willow moved to get up and answer it. She had learned the hard way that you don't call out an invitation to just anyone in Sunnydale. Sitting up, the young witch glanced out the window, seeing the bright sunlight streaming in and smiled to herself. No evil vampires would be knocking at her door this early in the day…chip or no chip. In the last few weeks, Willow had begun to wonder if living with Buffy had really been such a good idea. Demons were constantly gunning for the slayer, and it seemed that some did, indeed, make house calls. Hearing another knock at the door, she shook her thoughts away and called out an invitation.
"Angel?" Willow's eyes widened and she jumped off of the bed, shocked to see the dark-haired vampire before her. "Wh-what are you doing here? Is something wrong? Did your friend have another vision about Buffy?"
"Willow! It's so great to see you!" Angel lunged forward, pulling the redhead into a tight hug, startling her and squeezing so tightly that it left her breathless.
"Uh, Angel?" He heard her muffled words and finally pulled back slightly, his hands still on her shoulders, refusing to completely let go, and a wide grin spread across his face. Willow looked up at him with shocked unease.
"A-are you alright?" She asked uncertainly, taking a step backwards and eyeing him nervously.
"I'm wonderful," he told her honestly. "Is Buffy around?"
Willow took another cautious step away from him, the backs of her legs hitting the bed frame. "No, she's, uh, not here right now. She's on a date."
"A date?" The smile melted from his face at her words.
"Um…Angel, are you evil again? I…I mean, I know we just had this conversation, like, a week ago, a-and you were here to help and be protective and all, but…um…are you evil?"
Angel shocked the girl by laughing heartily. "I'm not evil, Willow," he told her, still grinning like the Cheshire cat. "Why would you think that?"
"Well, it's just that you're acting very un-Angel-y. Not that I don't like the more happy Angel, it just throws a girl off, and…" Angel laughed again and she pointed at him, her eyes narrowing slightly. "See? That, there! You! With the laughing and the smiling. It's…well, it's strange, and mildly unsettling, and…and…Angel, why are you here?" The witch let out a sigh, sitting down on the bed and holding her head wearily.
"Can you keep a secret? If I tell, you can't say a word to anyone else," he said, taking a step closer and looking around conspiratorially. Angel was practically bursting to tell someone else his news, and since Buffy wasn't around…
"Oh man!" She exclaimed, startling him slightly. "Keeping things from Buffy? I'm not that good at it, and she tends to get more than just a little miffed, especially when it comes to you. When she found out that I knew you were here during Thanksgiving, she was down right ticked, a-and when she's mad, she has a tendency to hide things. Buffy's surprisingly petty that way. I still can't find my blue binder OR my new hairbrush. And I…" Looking up at his amused face, the redhead let out another sigh and waved a hand at him. "Go ahead, tell away."
Angel moved quickly to sit beside her on the bed, and grabbed her hand, lifting it up and putting it against his chest. Willow gasped slightly at his actions and gave him a confused look.
"Um, Angel?"
"Feel anything…different?" He asked with a smirk.
"Um, have you, uh, been working out more or something? I mean, you've always been pretty buff, with the vampire physique and all, but I don't really feel…"
Angel chuckled again and held her hand tighter to him. "A heartbeat," he whispered. Willow's eyes widened as she felt the thumping below.
"Angel!" She gasped, pulling her hand away but still staring at his chest. "You're alive!"
"I know!" He smiled back. Before he could say more, the redhead launched herself at him, wrapping him in her arms and nearly knocking him to the ground. Angel hugged her back, surprised at how good it felt to have her body pressed against his. He felt a twinge of disappointment when she finally pulled back, but chose to ignore it.
"You're alive! You're human! Why aren't you off telling Buffy that… oh." Her excitement suddenly faded and her shoulders hunched slightly. "Right. The date thing. Oh, Angel, I'm sorry. It's all my fault. Blame me entirely."
Angel laughed again and shook his head. Same old Willow. Always taking on the burdens of others. "Willow, Buffy being on a date is not your fault," he told her.
"Well, true, e-except for that fact that I kinda helped to set it up, but only because he asked and he's a friend, and really nice, a- and good for her. Oh! But maybe you'll get lucky and he'll end up turning into an evil demon like the rest of the Sunnydale men, and Buffy'll slay him, and it'll be business as usual on the hell mouth."
Angel chuckled again at her strange optimism. "He's good for her?" He asked softly.
Willow nodded miserably. "Yeah, he really is."
"That's good," he told her. "That's what I wanted for her. A nice, normal guy that could give her a nice, normal life."
"But you ARE a nice, normal guy now, Angel," Willow insisted. "And you could give her that."
Angel shook his head. "It never worked between us. I thought maybe, now…But as soon as I got here, I knew…it just isn't meant to be. Besides, I may still be human, but there are still all sorts of bad things out there that are not. What kind of life would I give her? She'd worry about me at the wrong time and end up getting herself killed."
Willow looked down, nodding again. He was right, of course, but being right very seldom acted as much of a consolation for anyone.
"So, what are your big plans for your new found humanness?" The redhead asked, trying to perk him up again.
Angel smiled at her. "I don't know. Haven't really given it much thought yet."
"Well, um, what have you always wanted to do?" She questioned. There were probably a million things that she took for granted on a daily basis that the former vampire would love to do. He could walk in the sun, swim in the ocean…during daylight hours, finally see his reflection, and a very nice reflection it was too, run down the street and feel his heart pound as the adrenalin rushed through him, tan at the beach, see the sunset…
"I think I'd like to try ice cream," he stated finally. Willow arched an eyebrow at him. Try ice cream? He had just become human, and the first thing that came to his mind was trying ice cream? A moment later, she shrugged. Ice cream WAS pretty good, she had to admit. Standing up, she held out her hand, pulling him up to stand beside her, and moved toward the door.
"Then ice cream you shall have," she proclaimed, grabbing a coat and opening the door as the brunette followed her out, a content smile on his face.
~Part: 2~
"I can't believe how good this is! I mean, I had always heard…but…I never knew it was THIS good," Angel told Willow, taking the first lick of ice cream into his mouth. Opening wide, he took a large bite, shivering slightly as the cold cream filled his mouth. "And cold," he added with a grin.
"I can't believe you ordered eight different flavors," she laughed, licking at her small cone.
"You try to decide between chocolate, chocolate fudge, chocolate mint swirl, mint chocolate chip and chocolate cocoa cream when you've never had any," he reminded her.
Willow smiled and nodded. "There's a couple flavors there that even I haven't tried yet," she admitted.
"Really? Which ones?"
Willow pointed to the chocolate mint swirl on the top of the high- piled cone, and Angel grinned as he held it out to her, offering her a taste. The redhead leaned forward, taking a small bite. She giggled as the yummy treat slipped past her lips, and turned her face away a bit, accidentally brushed the cool cream with her cheek.
"Hey, you got a little bit," Angel began, as he reached out with his free hand and gently wiped the ice cream from her cheek, his fingers lingering on her now heated flesh. Willow blushed furiously and ducked her head a little in embarrassment.
"Thanks," she whispered, looking away. Had she kept her eyes on him, Willow surely would have been startled by the suddenly heated gaze he held upon her.
When she finally looked back, she seemed to stare at him for a long time in awe. "Seeing you in the sunlight," she told him. "It's so… strange."
"Strange?" That wasn't exactly what he had been expecting her to say. Of course Willow rarely said much that anyone expected.
"Well, you know, I'm used to seeing you all dark and broody, at night, with your big billowy coat, and…This is just a nice change." Her smile following those words was genuine, and brought one to his lips as well. He seemed to have been doing quite a bit of smiling since running into Willow, and Angel had to admit that not all of it had to do with his being human.
When the ice cream was finally finished, Willow looked up toward the sky, sighing. "Sun's starting to set," she told him. Angel nodded. "I know a place where we could go. I mean, if you wanted to watch it…i-if you didn't have other plans, I mean," she stammered, suddenly worried that she had already taken up too much of his time.
"Willow, I'd love to watch the sunset with you," he told her sincerely. "Can't think of anyone else I'd rather share that with." The redhead ducked her face down a bit and blushed again at his words, before standing and leading him away.
~*~
"You're right," Angel told her as they sat on the grassy hill. "This is perfect." The sky was painted with oranges and purples and golds now, though Angel surprisingly found his eyes more drawn to the red tresses framing the sweet face next to him.
He recognized the bluff they sat on as the place where he had nearly killed himself, waiting for the sun to rise. The First was trying to manipulate him, and Buffy had stopped the vampire from dusting himself. Those were less than pleasant memories, and Angel was more than a little happy that he was now replacing them with a much more fond moment with Willow.
"So, did you enjoy your first day of being human?" Willow asked, turning his attention once again back to the girl beside him.
"I did," he told her honestly. "It was all I ever dreamed it would be."
Willow smiled. She suspected that he wasn't being entirely truthful, what with the lack of Buffy and all, but figured she's let it slide for the time being.
Upon his questioning, Willow had told Angel about Oz and the circumstances behind his leaving. Angel knew that the girl's confidence in herself, which had been fragile at best before, was now completely shattered, and it left him feeling more than a little angry at her former boyfriend. He had seen Willow grow from a meek, shy girl into a powerful woman, able to take charge in the midst of the most difficult situations. Now, she looked lost and weary. Even when she smiled, it was never complete and always had an air of sadness to it, and Angel though it almost seemed as if she was simply waiting in limbo, holding out hope that Oz might come back for her.
"What are you going to do next?" She questioned curiously. Secretly, Willow hoped to get to spend a little more time with the former vampire. They had probably talked more in the past few hours than they had in the entire rest of the time that they had known one another, and the redhead was surprised at how much she was enjoying being with him. Angel was actually quite funny and charming, when he wasn't all broody or evil.
"Well, I've been thinking about that," he told her with a slight, sly grin. "There's a little plan I'm working on. There's a girl I want to seduce, and I'm hoping that you might be able to help me out."
Willow's shoulders slumped slightly at his words. He had decided to go for Buffy after all, and now, to top it off, he wanted her help. A beautiful, wonderful guy wanted Buffy and was asking for Willow's help…Nothing new there.
"Well, what's your first plan of action?" She asked, her tone flat and her eyes missing the sparkle that had been there just a moment before.
"This," he whispered, leaning forward and taking a deep breath, before cupping her face in one hand and brushing his lips against hers. He heard her gasp softly, and felt her body tense slightly, before the redhead leaned further into him, opening her mouth to his questing tongue and returning his growing passion with her own.
When Angel finally pulled away, allowing them both a needed breath of air, Willow looked up into his heated gaze, shocked at the sheer desire that she found there. Running a hand along her cheek and tracing it down over her jaw, Angel brushed his thumb over her lips, which were now red and slightly swollen.
"So beautiful," he whispered. Willow moved to turn away, still not accustomed to his compliments, but Angel's hand on her cheek stopped her movement, and he brought his fingers to her chin, tilting her face upwards to look at him once again. "Don't know how I missed it before," he told her sincerely. "But I'm glad I got to see it now."
Willow bit her lower lip as she felt her eyes grow watery. This was something that she had never expected to happen. Angel, he was Buffy's, and kissing him…It was wrong. She was breaking the most sacred code of friendship. That thought mingled with the confusion of the very act itself. Angel…he had kissed her, but had it actually been the blonde slayer that he had been thinking of at the moment?
As if reading her thoughts, Angel leaned in, kissing her lips softly, before speaking to her in low, hushed tones. "I'm here with you, Willow," he told her. "I want you."
The redhead searched his eyes, as if desperate for validation of the truth. "Why?" She whispered, a sob escaping with the word.
Brushing a stray tear from her cheek, Angel smiled down at her. "Anyone that knows you, Willow, would know the answer to that one. It seems pretty obvious to everyone that isn't you." At that, he leaned in, once again claiming her lips with his own, determined to drive all insecurities and self-depreciating thoughts from her mind. Tensing for a moment, Willow felt strong arms wrap around her, pulling her closer, and finally she relaxed into the embrace, allowing herself to become lost in the emotion that he was creating. The world became hazy, and consisted of nothing more than his lips on hers, his hands caressing her body, his fingers sliding along her arms, under her shirt, across her stomach, up her back, his breath against her own, his heartbeat pounding in time with her own. Watching her expressions intently, Angel became entranced with the redhead before him, never taking notice as the sun set behind them, sinking below the horizon and shrouding them in deep purple and dark red hues.
Moving faster than two humans should have been able to, the couple found their way back to Willow's dorm, the journey back to campus an utter blur of stolen kisses and caressing fingers. Shutting the door with a clumsy slam, Angel eagerly claimed Willow's lips in a passionate kiss, gently nudged her backwards until she was sprawled below him on the bed, a feast before his eyes, her red hair fanned around her head like a fiery halo. The young witch arched up slightly as he lifted her shirt from her, breaking the kiss for only a moment, before resuming their fevered explorations. As his fingers danced expertly over her soft skin, Willow snaked her arms around him, running her hands up under his shirt, her nails scraping lightly along his back, pulling him in impossibly closer. Within seconds, his own shirt was removed and they both reveled in the feel of skin against skin.
With barely restrained need, the rest of their clothes were torn from them, both completely oblivious to anything of the outside world. Nothing existed beyond the two new lovers and the passion that was building between them, as each diligently explored the other's body.
The former vampire was panting slightly, unaccustomed to the need for breathe, and awed by the woman below him. Sliding down slightly, he began a trail kisses over her neck, across her chest and further down, working the redhead into a heated frenzy as she kissed any bit of skin that would come within reach, and eventually pulled at Angel, urging him back upward and claiming his lips in a kiss so fierce it would rival the most expert lover.
"Please, Angel," she whispered, the only encouragement he needed. In one fluid motion, Angel filled her, swallowing her scream in a claiming kiss, before taking up a steady rhythm, driving them both quickly to the edge of all reason or thought. Feeling her body tense with the oncoming waves of ecstasy, Angel leaned down to kiss the redhead again, feeling himself finally give in and allowing his climax to wash over him, just as he felt her grip him tighter and shudder with her own.
Willow snuggled closer to the man holding her, still shaking slightly from the sheer power and emotion of what had just happened.
"What happens now?" She questioned in a tiny voice. Angel wasn't sure how to answer that. She lived in Sunnydale. Her life was there, and his was in L.A. He knew his feelings for the girl ran deep, but just how deep, he wasn't sure. Everything had happened so suddenly, and after all, what kind of life could he offer her, being a vamp-… Pausing in his thoughts, Angel reminding himself of the recent changes in his life…joining the living. Old habits died hard, he supposed, but the former vampire began to wonder…Did his new found mortality mean that he no longer had to fight in the dark? After all, he still knew of the things that went bump in the night, more so than most, and despite his recent reprieve from an unlife of brooding and serving as a champion for the powers that be, Angel still felt compelled to fight the good fight, help the helpless. That just left him with one nagging question…Where did he and the beautiful redhead beside him go from there?
Angel's thoughts were interrupted by a funny jingling sound, coming from his coat on the dorm room floor.
"Angel?" Willow mumbled sleepily against his chest. "Do you have a cell phone?"
"What? Huh? Oh yeah…I hate that damn thing," he groused as he pulled himself from the redhead's warm embrace and stood up. Willow watched through hooded eyes as he made his way across the small room.
"I'm not too fond of it either, right about now," she mumbled, though she had to admit, the view he created was nothing to complain about.
"Hello?" Angel answered with a growl.
"Whoa. Hey there," Doyle responded, his voice slightly broken up by static.
"Doyle?" Angel glared at the phone before pressing it back to his ear and squinting slightly, as if that would help him to hear better.
"The Mohra dem-…It regen-ated -ore than -ust -ou," Doyle explained to him, his voice breaking up.
"What?"
"I had a vision," he yelled into the phone. "It regenerated itself."
"Where?" Angel questioned.
"-unnel -ere you fou- it. Then it was in some -emetery. I –ink… Sunnydale."
Angel began pacing back and forth as he spoke in a hushed tone into the phone, Willow watching nervously. "You saw it in Sunnydale? Are you sure?"
"Yeah, man, and it was pretty damn angry if I might mention," Doyle told him. "-ink it might...after the slayer?"
Angel shook his head, though Doyle obviously didn't hear his response. "I'll have to kill it again."
"Yeah, but -re -uman now. They released y-," Doyle reminded him, the static on the phone getting worse, as Angel began to pick up the frequency of some Mexican radio station.
"Look, Doyle, I can't let that thing roam free. I'll take care of it," Angel muttered, before shutting the phone and slipping it back into his coat pocket. He looked up toward the redhead, smiling weakly.
"Trouble?" She questioned with a soft smile.
"As usual," he told her. "I hate to leave, but there's a…thing that I have to…well…kill. Willow, I'm sorry, but hopefully it won't take long and I can come back and…"
"I'm coming with you," she told him, standing up and wrapping the sheet around her slight frame.
"What? No. No, Willow, I can't let you…"
"Hey, Mr," Willow interrupted, stepping up to him, "human girl, full of free will here. I'm. Coming. With. You."
Angel saw the look on her face and knew what it meant. He wasn't going to win this argument.
"I don't want you to get hurt," he told her, leaning in and kissing her softly.
When he pulled away she smiled at him. "And I don't want YOU to get hurt. You're human now, Angel, and between the two of us…No offense here, but I have the magic behind me. A-and okay, so it isn't always full proof, but it's better than nothing, and I'm going whether you like it or not."
With a crooked grin, Angel leaned down, capturing her lips once again with his own.
"I love you, you know that?" He mumbled against her mouth, his eyes widened a second later, along with her own, as he realized that he had just spoken out loud.
"You…you…" She stammered, her face turning red and her eyes wider than he had ever seen.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that out loud," he told her.
"But…you meant it?" She asked in a tiny voice, the words falling somewhere between a question and a statement.
Angel simply looked into her eyes and nodded. "I can't explain it. I didn't see it coming, but…"
Willow interrupted him with another passion filled kiss, nothing more needing to be said between the two.
~Part: 3~
Angel stalked quickly through the cemetery, Willow struggling to keep up as she pored through one of the demon anthologies she had grabbed on the way out the door.
"Angel, this is bad," she called to him.
"I know," he answered back over his shoulder. "I can't believe it followed me all the way to Sunnydale."
"No, I mean…this thing, this demon, it doesn't JUST come back. It comes back bigger and stronger." She paused for a moment, contemplating what she had just said. "Huh. Nice power to have." Angel stopped walking, Willow nearly bumping into him, and turned around, staring at her incredulously. "Unless of course you're the enemy," she added quietly.
They resumed walking once more, Willow again trailing after the former vampire. She couldn't help but muse to herself that he was still surprisingly fast for a human.
"Angel, this isn't your ordinary, run of the mill demon. Maybe we should try to find Buffy, and…"
"No! Look, I know what I'm doing," he interrupted, his tone gruff. Willow frowned and Angel stopped again, immediately regretting his harshness.
"Willow, I'm sorry. I just…I'm mad at myself for not killing this thing for good the first time around, and now I've put you in danger, and after tonight, I…"
"You don't want Buffy to know what happened," the redhead whispered sadly, looking toward the ground, the book slipping from her hand and hitting the soft ground with a dull thump.
"What? No! That's not…" Angel let out a sigh, running a hand through his hair, before grabbing her shoulders and waiting for her to look up at him. "This isn't a Buffy thing," he told her. "Me and Buffy… Well, there is no more me and Buffy. Thought I'd made that clear earlier tonight. You're the one I'm thinking about now."
"I know, Angel, I just…"
"Don't believe me," he finished. Willow opened her mouth to protest, but he quickly quieted her. "I know you don't, and that's alright, because I'm going to spend the rest of my life proving it to you." She smiled softly at him and Angel leaned down, kissing her forehead. "Right now, I have to prove that I can still do this, still fight the fight. Just tell me how to kill this thing so that I can get it done and then take you back to bed where you belong."
"Oh!" Willow's smile grew as she grabbed for her book again. Angel watched, grinning slightly. The witch always was happiest when she was needed. "Uh…'It regenerates until the dark future it envisions is upon us.' Huh…Well that can't be good," she remarked. "I'm guessing his dark future doesn't involve fluffy kitties or heapin scoops of ice cream, and…Right, not the point, sorry." Upon his quizzical and slightly impatient stare, the babbling redhead looked back to the book again. "Oh! Oh! `Okay, to kill the beast, one must bring darkness to one thousand eyes.' Humph. They never make these things easy, do they? A thousand eyes," she scoffed.
"Funny, I only saw two," the former vampire dead-panned.
"I see you're still with the glib," Willow remarked. "Good to see. It makes me feel like we have a chance. Like the olden days, when…" Willow's voice trailed off as they came across two dead and bloodied bodies, both Willow and Angel stumbling back slightly.
"The blood," Angel choked out, covering his mouth.
Willow winced at the sight and looked away. "Yeah, it's a little different when you're human I guess."
"I'm going to kill that thing," he ground out.
"Just, uh…remember that it's brutal, a-and deadly, and," Willow paused, looking up, "here!"
At her exclamation, the Mohra demon jumped out in front of them, beginning to spar with Angel. Trying to get him away from the quickly weakening ex-vampire, Willow was easily thrown to the ground, several feet away, the wind knocked out of her.
Ignoring the fallen girl, the Mohra once again began to attack Angel, easily overpowering him. Finally able to move out of the demon's reach for a moment, Angel turned to run, praying that it would follow him and forget about Willow altogether. The former vampire was no match for the powerful demon, and the Mohra caught up to him quickly, throwing him to the ground and pressing a foot to his neck.
"The end of days has begun and can't be stopped," the demon told a struggling Angel. "For any one of us that falls, ten shall rise."
"Ten to one. Those are pretty good odds, but I think mine are better." Both the Mohra and Angel turned and looked at the redhead standing behind them, her arms out-stretched and her eyes blackened.
"A great darkness is coming," the Mohra stated.
"Oh. So you noticed," she replied with a cocky smile, just before releasing a bolt of energy, knocking the demon several feet back.
The Mohra quickly stood up and moved toward the redhead as Angel struggled to get up. Just before the demon reached her, Willow let loose with another bolt of energy. This time, the demon only swayed on his feet, Willow's eyes widening in fear as it continued toward her. Suddenly, Angel noticed something.
"The light of a thousand eyes," he muttered, staring at the demon. "The jewel in its forehead! Willow, smash the jewel!"
Looking up, Willow saw the gleaming object and shut her eyes, using the last of her energy to float the book she had been carrying, and sent it hurling through the air. It smashed the jewel and she heared the demon scream in pain a moment later, before it disappeared with a flash of bright light.
The redhead fell to her knees, thoroughly exhausted and no longer able to support her own weight. A second later, Angel was kneeling by her side.
"Willow, are you…"
"I'm okay, Angel. A-and you're alive, and…" Her voice trailed off as she clutched at her head, panting slightly. "And I could really use a couple…bottles of aspirin…and maybe a bed."
Angel chuckled slightly as he slowly stood and helped her up. "I think that's an order I can fill," he told her, kissing her gently before lifting her in his tired and aching arms, heading back to the dorms.
"When did you become so strong?" He asked softly, a question really meant more for himself than for her.
"I've learned a few tricks since you moved out of town," she murmured with a smile, leaning into his chest. "Still not that strong, but I'm getting there."
"You're the strongest person I know, Willow," he whispered softly, bringing a proud, if not sleepy smile to her lips.
Looking down, he noticed a trickle of blood seeping from a small wound on her head, the sight more than a little discomforting to him. Only yesterday that would have been more temptation than Angel could handle, but now, today, it was something else entirely. It was her life, the one he had not been able to protect.
~*~
"You're asking to be what you were, a demon with a soul, because of the witch?" The female oracle questioned. Angel nodded, thinking of nothing but the girl he had left sleeping in her dorm room.
"Oh, this is a matter of love. It does not concern us," the male stated dismissively.
"Yes, it does," Angel insisted. After taking Willow home, and leaving her to sleep, he had come back to the oracles, performing the spell that Doyle had done earlier that day. He had made what was surely the most difficult decision of his life. He was asking to have this gift taken away, to be made a demon again. After the attack that night, he had realized something…He could not turn his back on the cause, and he could not serve it in that state. Not only had he nearly gotten himself killed, Angel had not been able to protect Willow. Had it not been for her own power, they both would have died that night, and THAT was something that he knew he could not live with.
"The Mohra demon came to take a warrior from your cause - and it succeeded. I'm no good to you like this. I know you have it in your power to make this right. Please," he begged.
"What is done can not be undone," the man told him.
"What is not yet done can be avoided," the woman contradicted with a soft, knowing smile.
"Temporal folds are not to indulge in - the whims of lower beings," the man stated harshly.
"You are wrong. This one is willing to sacrifice every drop of human happiness and love he has ever known for another. He is not a lower being." Her words were softly spoken, and meant in kindness, though they stung Angel more than he would have expected.
"There is one way. But it is not to be undertaken lightly," the man yielded.
"We swallow this day, as though it had never happened. Twenty-four hours from the moment the demon first attacked you in LA, we take it back," she explained.
Angel contemplated that for a moment. "Then none of this happened, and Willow and I…What - what'll stop me from doing the same thing again? Won't I just fight the demon, become human and..."
"You," the woman explained with a sad smile. "You alone will carry the memory of this day. Can you carry that burden?" After several moments of thought, Angel finally gave a solemn nod, turning away from the two higher beings. It was, he knew, for the best.
~*~
Quietly entering the small, dark room, Angel made his way over to the bed and carefully sat down, not wanting to rouse the sleeping redhead. He watched her face for several moments, before running a hand through her soft hair and then pulled back, seeing her stir, regretting waking her.
"Angel?" She mumbled.
"I'm sorry, Willow," he whispered, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Go back to sleep."
Hearing the pain and sadness in his voice, she opened her eyes and struggled to sit up. His shushing did nothing to deter her as she glared at him with a knowing look.
"What's wrong? Where did you go?" She questioned, resolve face firmly in place.
Knowing that he couldn't lie to her, Angel looking down as he spoke. "I went to see the oracles."
"The ones that told you about the whole being human thing?" She questioned. "Why?"
"I asked them to turn me back," he told her quietly, his voice catching in his throat.
"What? Why?" She questioned, starting to push him away before he grasped her hands tightly, refusing to let go. "Why would you…"
"Because I love you," he interrupted in a harsh whisper, looking up and directly into her eyes.
"No," she whispered, refusing to believe what she knew was true. "No, you don't. You can't, Angel, not if…"
"Willow, if I stayed mortal, I'd end up getting us both killed. Tonight…I couldn't even protect you!"
"Protect me? Angel, in case you didn't notice, I wasn't really all that needing of protection tonight. Remember the whole powerful witch thing?" Her voice was growing more urgent with each word as she clung to him.
"I know, Willow, you were amazing, but…If I stayed with you, I would be a liability to you. We wouldn't be helping anyone."
"So, what…Because I'm a witch, a-and I happen to have a little power going…Does that mean I can't be with someone who ISN'T a superhero? Cause, you know, the choices are kinda slim in that department, and the last time I tried dating someone with a demon side…didn't work out that well." Willow was growing desperate at this point, tears filling her angry eyes.
"I can't be with you, knowing that I might cost you your life," Angel told her, hating to hurt her so much, "or the lives of others. The fight, it's never easy, and I wouldn't be able to stand by your side."
"So I lose. I lose because I chose to stay here and fight evil and do good? This is what I get?" Willow shouted tearfully.
Angel pulled her somewhat resistant body into his, wrapping his arms tightly around the redhead. "I couldn't tell you," he whispered. "I wasn't sure if I could do it. If I woke up with you by my side for just one morning…"
Willow nodded, biting her lower lip. "So, what happens now?" She repeated her question from earlier that evening.
"The Oracles are giving us back the day, turning back time, so I can kill Mohra before his blood makes me mortal," he told her.
"When?" She asked in a tiny voice.
Angel glanced at the clock by her bed. 8:58. "Another two minutes."
"A minute?" Willow cried, tears free flowing down her flushed cheeks. "No. No, it's not enough time!"
"We don't have a choice. It's done," he told her mournfully.
"What am I supposed to do now?" She questioned, wiping at her eyes. "I just got you, a-and now…What am I supposed to do, remembering…"
"You won't." he interrupted. "No one will know but me."
"Everything we did," she gasped.
"It never happened," he told her.
Willow's face suddenly turned hard and she looked down. He knew, immediately, what she was thinking, that he WANTED to erase what happened. That he regretted what had transpired between them. That becoming a vampire again was the better alternative to being with her.
"I get it," she mumbled. "It's a Buffy thing."
"No. Willow, no, I told you before, it's not a Buffy thing. This has nothing to do with her. This is a Willow thing."
"I didn't ask for it to be a Willow thing," she told him.
"You didn't have to," Angel whispered in response.
"Don't just say what you think I want to hear," she demanded harshly, wiping at the tears on her face.
"What do you want, Willow?"
"The truth. I know, it sounds like a crazy notion, but there's this fun little game I like to play every once in a while, where I ask someone a question and they tell me the real answer," she replied bitterly.
Grasping her face in his hands, he looked her in the eyes as he spoke, his voice filled with emotion. "Willow, I will always remember. I love you, please don't doubt that. This is about you and me and nothing else. It's a Willow thing."
The redhead simply diverted her eyes, biting her lower lip. "I felt your heartbeat," she whispered, choosing to ignore what he said. Both of them were now freely crying. "I felt it."
"Shh, please. Please," he begged softly, holding her close. "I'm not pushing you away, Willow. I'm doing what I have to, to keep you safe and alive. I'm so sorry."
The redhead simply continued to cling to him, crying into his chest. "I love you, Willow. Please, please believe me. Say you believe me. Please believe me," the brunette sobbed desperately.
"I believe you," Willow whispered suddenly, leaning up and kissing his lips. "I'll never forget. I'll never forget," she mumbled over and over as they clung to one another and the numbers on the clock flipped to 9:00.
~*~
"Right, man, so I says to the guy, if you want the job done, your goin ta have ta shell out a little for it," Doyle stated. Angel blinked several times. He was back in the office and slightly disoriented. It was the previous day and it took the vampire a moment to get his bearings.
"And do you know what he said?" Doyle continued talking. "He said he planned to send the check, and he didn't mean to…"
"Forget," Angel mumbled.
"Well, yeah. How'd you…" Before the Irishman could finish, the Mohra demon, whom had been the one to make Angel human, crashed through the window, screaming. Angel turned, grabbing a clock from his desk and easily smashed the jewel in the demon's head with it, watching as it disappeared with a bright flash of light.
"That was…wow. You're really good man," Doyle stated in stunned surprise. "I mean, not to say you weren't good before, but…you must really be honin in on your instincts. I mean…how did ya know how ta kill it?"
"It's a Mohra demon," Angel told him, his expression blank and his voice empty. "I…I had a lot of time to catch up on my reading recently."
"Yeah, okay man, whatever you say."
At that, Angel turned and walked away, desperate to find a nice, quiet, dark little room to brood in for the remains of the day.
~*~
The sun was just setting. Angel could feel the familiar tingle that let him know that night was nearly upon them, and all he could think of was the redhead with the little spot of ice cream on her cheek, and the big smile on her face, and the huge heart…which he had broken. Sure, she didn't remember now, but her anguished cries just before he left haunted him.
Hearing a small knock at the door, Angel let out a small sigh before calling out an invitation. His eyes widened and he jumped up from his chair as the redhead came into view.
"Willow! What…what are you doing here?"
The redhead raised an eyebrow. "That's the greeting I get?"
"Sorry, I just…I'm surprised that…" Angel was flustered and had no ideas what to say or do. Fortunately, Willow quickly put him out of his misery, interrupting his stammering.
"So, were you really willing to just pretend that none of it happened?" That question left the vampire completely dumbfounded. He sputtered for several moments before finally trying to ask how she remembered.
"Funny thing about witches. We can see through magic, when we're strong enough, and I seem to remember someone telling me that I was the strongest person he knew."
"Willow," he gasped. "I'm sorry. You weren't supposed to remember."
"Well, I'm glad I do," she told him, just before taking a step forward and kissing the stunned vampire. "You know, I never got the chance to tell you that I love you," she murmured against his lips, bringing a smile to both of their faces. Keeping his arms tightly around her, Angel leaned back slightly, giving her a questioning look. "You said you loved me, and I told you that I believed you, but I never got to say it back."
"But…but now…I'm a vampire," he told her sadly.
"I sorta noticed that," she responded with a grin. "But like you said, I'm not Buffy. I'm not a slayer. I'm a witch…A witch who happens to be looking for a superhero to fall in love with. Any idea where I might find one?"
Squeezing her tightly to him, Angel smirked down at her. "I think I might know one," he whispered, before once again pulling her into a passionate kiss that promised to never end.
The End