Disclaimer-None are mine. BtVS belong to Joss. The song belongs to James Taylor(duh?)
Distribution-Willow's World, Angel of Mine
Rating-PG
Category-Angst/character death(again with the duh)*G*
Key Pairing-W/A
Summary-If ya know the song, you have the gist of the story.
Dedicated to anyone still reading anything I write.
Author's Note-I know, been awhile since I've done a song fic, but hey, been busy. Need something to get over one massive case of writer's block that refuses to go away. I am trying though. Feedback helps.
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Just yesterday morning they let me know you
were gone
Suzanne the planes they made put an end to
you
I walked out this mornin' and I wrote down
this song
I just can't remember who to send it to
I can't believe she's gone. It seems like only yesterday that she appeared in my living room, a board game under her arm, trying to get me to discuss what was bothering me. She got me to open up about the things that had happened to me. She made me talk about everything that I was feeling, telling me that it would help me in the long run. And she was right, much to my surprise. It made me feel more alive than I have in over two hundred years. I found myself telling her about my family and friends, both good times and bad, and she sat there and listened attentively, never passing judgement on me. She held me when the emotions that I have been holding in for so long finally became too much for me to bear, whispering soft words of comfort into my ear. With her, I was finally alive again, but that's all gone now. She's gone now. Forever. It was only supposed to be a short trip to San Francisco to pick up something from some witches that Giles knew. Only a day trip. But something went wrong and now I'll never see her again.
I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would
never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find
a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you again
I've seen so much in my life. So much beauty. So much pain. Sadness and happiness. War and peace. There were times when there were so many people around me that I thought I would go crazy if they didn't leave me alone and then there were the times when I was so lonely that I thought I would go crazy if I didn't find someone to talk to. And she understood all of those things. I think it was because she felt them too. I always knew that one day I would have to say goodbye to her. It's the nature of what I am, but not this soon. Not after we had finally found each other. We had so many plans. So many dreams. How am I supposed to go on, knowing that I'll never have the chance to see her smiling face one more time? To look in her eyes that remind me of the finest emeralds and see the love that we shared in them. I always knew that life was unfair, but damnit, why did it have to show me just how unfair it was by taking her away from me before we had a chance to truly be happy.
Won't you look down upon me Jesus
You gotta help me make a stand
You just got to see me through another day
My body's achin'and my time is at hand
I won't make it any other way
We buried her today. Or, more accurately we buried what
was left of her today. There was so much damage from the crash that
there had only been enough to identify her, and even then it had been difficult.
If it wasn't for the fact that I had seen, and often inflicted, so much
pain and carnage in my long life, I don't think I would have been able
to identify her at
all. As it was, it took all the strength I had to nod my head
and say that, yes, it was my fiancée. I felt tears streak
down my face as I saw her red hair, dirty from the smoke and fire that
had followed the crash. I tried to take her hand in mine, just one
last time, but the police officer that was there prevented me from doing
so. It took all the self control I had to
prevent my demon from coming out and attacking the man that was only
trying to be gentle and caring to me. Trying to comfort me in my
obvious time of grief. Then I turned to face her friends. The ones
that had been there for her since her sophomore year. The ones that
had been hurt by her and I being together, but finally coming around and
accepting the fact that we were in love. Even willing to help plan
the wedding. They look at me, their own grief obvious on their faces,
and I wonder how I'm supposed to go on when my one ray of light isn't by
my side.
I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would
never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find
a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you again
I run my fingers over your name. Memorizing the feeling of the cold granite under my hands. You deserve so much more than just this simple headstone. You deserve to be alive, laughing and giggling at something that someone said. You deserve to have that type of life that you always dreamed of. Children. A home. A man that you love and that loved you in return. And you almost had that. Well, maybe not the children part, but we were thinking of adopting at some point, remember? And I do love you. So much more than I ever got to tell you. I always thought that I had time. A lifetime to tell you. Our lifetime. But that Fates, or the Powers that Be, or whoever it is in charge of what happens to us had other plans. They wanted you with them, although I can't blame them for that. I mean, I wanted you with me for the rest of your life, so why shouldn't they. I just didn't think it would be this soon.
Been walkin' my mind to an easy time
My back turned towards the sun
Lord knows when the cold wind blows it'll
turn your head around
Well there's hours of time on the telephone
line to talk about things to come
Sweet dreams and fine machines in pieces on
the ground
You know, if it wasn't for you, I wouldn't even be here today. I don't mean, here in the cemetery, but I mean, here, as in alive. Or undead as the case may be. There had been quite a few times since I returned when things had gotten too difficult for me to continue the existence that I was living. Quite a few occasions where I decided that it was time for me to die, but thoughts of you kept popping into my head. You sweet laugh. That adorable smile. The way your eyes twinkled when you were happy. They made me want to continue to fight. Why do you think I always called you in the middle of the day, when I knew you would be home from your classes? It was because I needed to hear your voice. To know that there was someone that cared for me. But now, you're gone all because of a stupid place.
Oh I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would
never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find
a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you baby,
one more time again
Thought I'd see you one more time again
There's just a few things comin' my way this
time around
Thought I'd see, thought I'd see you...
Angel turned his face as he felt the early morning sun rising over the mountains of Sunnydale. He removed the leather jacket that he always wore, laying it across the headstone by his side. He wanted the others to know what had happened to him and not worry about him anymore. He knew they would understand why he did what he did and wouldn't condemn him for it. As the first moments of pain began to pierce his grief filled mind, his last thoughts were of the red headed woman that had stolen his heart.
"I love you, my Willow," he whispered right before he turned to dust.
Later that day, Buffy and Xander stood by Willow Rosenberg's grave. The blonde Slayer held the leather jacket that had been draped over the headstone in her arms, silent tears falling freely done her face. She had known, even before they had gotten there and seen that jacket and the ashes, that Angel was gone. She had felt it the moment he had died.
"Buffy," Xander whispered.
"Yeah, Xan?"
"Do you think they're together, wherever they are?"
"I hope so," the Slayer replied. "I certainly hope so." And the two friends stood together, mourning the loss of two of their own and praying to whoever would listen that Willow and Angel had finally found the peace that they had been looking for.
The End