~~*~~*~~*~~*~~
Spike shifted uncomfortably before continuing his slow, precise
steps.
Another month had passed, and he now felt confident enough to attempt
walking. The process was slow and painstaking, and he was
constantly
glancing towards the door, hoping upon hope that he wouldn’t find
anyone
watching him. He hated knowing that Willow and his sire saw
him helpless in
a wheelchair, but he felt that allowing them to see him taking
these first
struggling steps would be even worse. Spike sighed softly,
a needless
expulsion of air, as he let his mind wander to Willow.
She still hadn’t said a word. It had been months - four of
them, to be
exact - since her life had been irrevocably changed, and she still
lived in
her own silent world, although she did seem to be getting better.
She had
taken to smiling again, and each time she granted him with the
glory of one
of her grins, the blonde vampire felt his silent heart flip-flop
in his
chest. Of course, simply seeing her could do that to him.
Often, he would sit by her bed and watch her sleep, occasionally
waking her
from a nightmare, but more often than not simply watching her quietly.
She
tended to mumble in her sleep, and muffled and nonsensical as those
few
muttered words always were, it still granted him the opportunity
to hear her
voice, and he cherished those moments. For he knew
that, once she awoke,
she would remain silent for the duration of the day.
A soft gasp startled Spike out of his reverie, and he turned sharply,
nearly
losing his balance before catching himself. He gripped the
counter
desperately as he looked at the intruder.
Willow’s eyes were wide with surprise, and Spike straightened up
as much as
he was able as she stepped cautiously into the room. She
walked slowly
towards him, stopping when she was directly in front of the blonde
vampire.
There was a tinge of fear in her eyes, and Spike knew it was because
she
wasn’t certain how he’d react to her catching him like this.
Trying to put
her at ease, he softened his expression, smiling slightly.
Carefully,
almost as if she was afraid he would lash out at her, Willow lifted
her hand
to his cheek, then dropped it down to cover his hand, smiling gently
at him.
“Hello, pet,” Spike said quietly, allowing her to lead him back
to his
wheelchair. He could feel her eyes on him, taking in the
shaky way he was
walking. She carefully pushed him back into the chair, then
knelt beside
his wheelchair. The tiny redhead then looked back at where
Spike had been
standing when she had entered the room. Willow squeezed his
hand, then
turned back to him, beaming, and clearly thrilled that Spike had
been
walking. After a moment, her smile faded slightly, and she
gazed at him
quizzically. It was obvious to Spike what she wanted to know.
“I’ve been walking for a few days, Red. This is the furthest
I’ve made it.
I wasn’t going to tell you until I was doing better. It was
going to be a
surprise.” Willow cocked her head and looked at him guiltily,
and Spike
continued, used to these one-sided conversations by now.
“No, I’m not angry
at you for catching me. I would have told you sooner or later,
anyway.
Better you catching me than my good for nothing sire, that’s for
sure. The
wanker would have never let me hear the end of it.” Willow
shook her head
in denial, knowing that Angel would have never made fun of any
progress that
Spike was making. “Okay. So you’re right. He’d
have left me alone about
it,” Spike conceded with a smile as he reached out and smoothed
a lock of
hair from her face. Willow caught his hand and held it for
a moment, then
dropped it, a light blush touching her cheeks as she realized what
she had
done. The redhead stood up swiftly, then turned to the door.
When she
returned her gaze to Spike, there was a question in her eyes, and
Spike
sighed heavily, knowing what she was asking.
“All right, all right. You can go get him, and I’ll tell him
all about my
return to the realm of those who can stand on their own two feet.
But I’m
not giving him a demonstration,” he warned.
Willow nodded her acquiesce, then was gone, in search of Spike’s sire.
~~*~~*~~*~~*~~
Angel muttered to himself as he sketched. As was often the
case these days,
his mind wasn’t entirely in the present, instead lost in the past
as he
tortured himself with the memories of what he had done to the others.
To
Cordelia, to Xander, to... Buffy. The vampire growled softly
as the pencil
lead broke, and he tossed the offending piece of wood away, reaching
for
another one. He kept several pencils sharp and ready at all
times, and he
hardly missed a beat as he continued to work. The picture
was rather
macabre, a somewhat twisted rendition of the Slayer and her friends,
their
eyes open and unseeing in death, their faces showing terror.
Angel sighed and ran his hands through his hair as he tossed the
sketchpad
down. He swallowed hard as his eyes took in the horrific
rendering he had
been working on. He hadn’t even realized he’d been drawing
it... yet
another method his subconscious had come up with to torture him,
he
supposed. Blinking back tears, he covered his face with his
hands, not
wanting to see the drawing anymore.
At the gentle touch of a hand, Angel jumped and immediately dropped
his
human facade as he whirled around, startled, to face the intruder.
Willow’s eyes widened in fear and horror as gleaming golden eyes
met her
own. Oh, Goddess, what had happened? What had happened
to Angel? Was he
even Angel anymore? The redhead stepped backwards jerkily,
dropping her
hand from Angel’s shoulder. In her haste to get away, she
stumbled over her
own feet, falling to the ground.
Stricken by the fear in her eyes, Angel forced his human mask back
into
place and reached down to help Willow to her feet, wincing when
she shied
away.
Breathing erratically, Willow scrambled to her feet and headed for
the door.
It wasn’t until too late that Angel realized her intentions.
“Willow, no!” he shouted at her back as he stood to go after her,
but to no
avail.
By the time he reached the front door, she had already run through
it. She
had fled from him, running outside into the sunlight.
And he couldn’t follow her.