Parts: 1-8
E-Mail: kylia_bug@yahoo.com
DISCLAIMER: Nobody belongs to me, unfortunately. They belong to Joss & Mutant Enemy, and a few other people I don't know.
RATING: NC-17
SPOILERS: General season 4 BtVS; Season 1 Angel
CATEGORY: Willow/Angelus
SUMMARY: Angelus returns.
DISTRIBUTION: Fire & Ice, WitchFanFic, anyone else, ask, and you shall receive
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This takes place During Angel's 1st Season and BtVS 4th Season. Also this is something new from me, so let me know if it's horendous.
FEEDBACK: Please!!
DEDICATION: To Elka
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Los Angeles
Angel leaned back up against the wall, deceptively calm. He waited for the man to continue.
"Look, I, uh, I don't know anything." The man stuttered. Angel backhanded the man in one swift motion, landing him on the ground, his head crushed up against the wall.
"Wrong answer. Shall we try again?" He pushed his boot up against the man's chest.
"Okay, okay. The girls, the come into the club, but they rarely return. I don't know where he takes them, but that's usually the last we ever see of them."
Angel leaned down and picked the man up, slamming him into the wall. His head hit the hard concrete as he lost consciousness. Angel could feel the rage within him. It was powerful, almost overwhelming. He wanted to kill this man. He wanted to drain him. He could feel his demon, caged though it was, demanding this man's blood. It took every ounce of strength he could muster to push the demon back, into his chains. He let the man drop and turned and walked away, leaving him behind.
*********
Sunnydale
Willow sat at her desk and sighed heavily. She needed to get away. She couldn't think straight anymore. She couldn't feel anymore. One day was starting to run into the next. She hadn't slept all the way through the night in over a month. There had been a rash of Hellmouth activity lately and it was taking its toll on the young witch. She had been short-tempered and extremely cranky lately, and it hadn't gone unnoticed. She had a three-week break from school, and had decided to take Spike's advice.
He had suggested that she take a vacation. She had originally rebuked such an idea, but as the days went on, she had realized that it was fast becoming a necessity.
A knock at the door reminded Willow that she was running out of time. She stood up and opened it, revealing Spike.
"Hey, red. You ready?" He asked with a smile as we walked into her dorm room. She nodded.
"Yeah. I am." She grabbed her laptop and put in its case and added it to the two bags lying on her bed.
"Spike?" She turned to the blond vampire.
"Yes, luv?"
"Promise me you won't tell them where I've gone, or even that you know."
Spike looked at Willow for a second, thinking over her request. Seeing her expression, he nodded. "Alright, but you keep in touch with me. Either call me every day, or send me an Email." His tone left no room for argument. She nodded.
"Okay, then, lets hit the road!" He picked up her bags and walked out of her room. Willow followed him with a small smile.
End Part 1
Willow sunk into the couch and sighed. She was tired. The trip had been uneventful, but exhausting nonetheless. Spike had driven her to Los Angeles for her secret vacation. She would be spending three weeks with Cordelia. *Goddess! If Xander could see me now. * She chuckled to herself. Willow was closer to Cordelia now that she had moved to L.A. than she had been the entire time she lived in Sunnydale. She supposed it helped that the May Queen had changed a lot over the years. She had changed a lot just in the months since she moved to Los Angeles. Willow couldn't help but wonder if that was due to Angel's influence.
"So. Tell me" Cordelia came into the living room with two mugs of hot cocoa. She handed one to Willow and sat down in the chair across from her.
"Tell you what?" Willow asked, feigning ignorance.
Cordelia smiled.
"Oh no you don't. I want to know about what's going on in Sunnydale that has you so rattled. You look like shit."
Willow laughed at Cordelia's trademark tact. "Thanks, Cor. I appreciate it." She smiled, "Where to start? Well I guess it all started back in November, when Oz left. I told you about that, and then Spike came back, and I don't know, some time after that things really started to get out of control." She laughed. A hollow, empty sound. "You know, you'd think that with Riley and his commandos around the activity would be less, not more. But no, that would be too easy."
Willow paused as she took a sip of her cocoa and let the warmth slide down her throat. "We've just had one evil after another. From the Hellmouth almost opening to Giles becoming a demon to getting stuck in the middle of some weird hellmouthy feud between the initiative and the council. I'm just tired you know?"
She looked to Cordelia, who was listening intently with compassion and understanding, in her eyes. "And then, I've been having this dreams."
"What kind of dreams?" Cordelia asked quietly.
"I'm not really sure. I can never remember them when I wake up. I guess they're more like nightmares really, but they don't scare me."
"Well then how do you know that they are nightmares?" Cordelia asked curiously. Willow shrugged.
"I don't know. I can't really explain it. They feel dark, dangerous. But they don't frighten me. I don't know. It's probably just my crazy subconscious playing tricks on me." Willow looked at Cordelia for a long moment, wondering what she would say. She hadn't discussed her dreams with anyone except for Spike. He hadn't claimed to know what to tell her. In fact he didn't tell her anything. He just listened. He was a good friend. Willow couldn't stifle her giggle.
"What's so funny?" Cordelia asked with interest.
"Well, I was just sitting here thinking about how odd it is that I've been having these dreams for six months, and the only people I've told about them are you and Spike. It doesn't seem real. She laughed again, this time it was full of real humor. Cordelia laughed with her.
"You have a point. That is on the odd side of things,
but then again, odd seems to be the name of the game,
doesn't it?" They sat in comfortable silence for
several moments before Willow broke it.
"So, tell me about you? How are you holding up?"
"I'm good." Cordelia told her honestly. "It was hard at first, losing him like that, but Angel was a big help. It was nice to have someone close who felt Doyle's loss as much as I did." She smiled slightly,
"And I've kept pretty busy. There's no end to the evil nasties making a home in Sunny L.A." She grinned.
"How's Angel?" Willow asked.
"He's... He's Angel." She told her, unsure exactly what she could say.
"Cordelia?" Willow asked, noticing the frown on that
had appeared on Cordelia's face.
"Well, he's tense. All the time. Half the time he looks like he's about to explode. And a couple of times, he's lost control. Last week." She paused not sure if she could go on. She looked into Willow's eyes, and seeing her concern, continued, "Last week, he almost killed a guy." Her voice was a whisper.
"What?" Willow's voice was incredulous. "You mean like a vampire, or a demon, or..." She trailed off when she saw Cordelia shake her head.
"No, he was a guy, a normal mortal human guy. Okay, well maybe not mortal, he was a sleaze, but still. Angel has never lost control like that. It was scary. I don't know what wrong with him. I know he hasn't been sleeping well. That's part of it, but there's something else too. But he won't talk about it."
Willow took a deep breath. "Maybe I'll go see him tomorrow." Cordelia nodded, "Yeah. I'm sure he'd love to see you. I didn't tell him you were coming, since you don't want anyone to know where you are." Willow smiled.
"Thank you. I can't tell you how much I appreciate that, and letting me stay here." Cordelia shook her head.
"Forget it. That's what friends are for. And we are friends. Aren't we?"
"Yes, we are." Willow smiled, and for the first time in a long time she felt tired enough to sleep.
*******
Angel walked down the empty alley. He wasn't sure exactly what he was looking for. He told himself that he was on a quest for information, but if he was being honest with himself, he was really hoping to run into a vampire out looking for his evening meal. He couldn't explain it, but he felt this rage. It was bubbling to the surface, like a volcano ready to erupt.
As each day of restless sleep passed, he was losing a little bit of his control. Soon, he would have none. A part of him desperately wanted to stop, before he went to far. Another part of him, the part the demon controlled would relish in its loss.
He knew he was running out of time, but he didn't have any answers for what was happening to him. As far as he could tell, nothing had changed, but yet something had. He had changed, was still changing.
He had tried meditating, Thai chi, anything that would put him at peace. Nothing worked. He felt like he was missing some vital piece of the puzzle. Like he had always been missing it, but only now did he realize that the was doing the wrong puzzle.
Angel turned onto another side street, and realized he was only a block away from Cordelia's house. He hadn't noticed walking there. He had originally been on the other side of town. He didn't know why he would have come here at this time of night. He had a strong desire to go up and knock on her door. He didn't know why. It was almost like something was calling to him, bringing him here, against his will. It was some subconscious force. It called to his demon, and he could understand it. His rational side forced the urge down. He turned and ran in the other direction, back to his own apartment. He needed to get some sleep. He knew that was unlikely, but he had to try.
End Part 2
Angel rolled over in his bed. Sleep had not come, and now his exhaustion was making him irritable. He turned to look at the clock. It was two-forty five.
He had heard Cordelia come in several hours ago. She hadn't come down to see him, and he was rather grateful for it. He was still troubled by the events of the previous night. He didn't know what had driven him to go to Cordelia's house, or what it was that was calling to him. Calling to his demon. He knew that whatever it was, it was his demon that it beckoned. He had no doubt about that. The fact that his demon had controlled his actions long enough for him to get to Cordelia's troubled him. But not as much as he would have thought. His mind was a haze. Nothing was clear anymore.
There was a time when he could separate himself, and his actions. He could tell the difference between that which he did, what he wanted to do, and that which his demon desired. Once, he had been able to differentiate between himself, and Angelus, even though Angelus was a part of him, the opposite could not be said.
With his soul, Angel could remember everything that Angelus had done. He could even remember what it felt like to do those things. The emotions were still there, although he repressed them. As Angelus, however, he still had the memories, but the emotions, didn't seem to carry over, at least not in the same sense. He remembered thinking about his souled existence after he had changed, and he couldn't feel quite the same way about the things he had done. He could no longer feel the love he had had for Buffy.
He hadn't really expected to feel the same. His soul was gone, and the demon had taken over. But now, looking back, he realized that she should have remembered the emotion, even if he didn't share in them any longer. It was this realization which told him that although Angelus was still a very big part of Angel, Angel was not a big part of Angelus.
That realization should have shocked him, terrified him even, but it didn't. Instead he felt a kind of relief. He wasn't sure why that was. He was beyond caring though. He had wrestled with these thoughts for far too long. His time in Hell had provided him with the opportunity to analyze everything he had ever been, everything he had ever thought.
He was losing control of himself, of his very soul. His demon was breaking through its chains. It was expressing itself through his actions. Actions that he couldn't always stop. He was a turning point. He realized that soon, things would change. Either his soul would win, or his demon would.
Although, his soul screamed at him to fight the power the demon was controlling, another part of him, not controlled by the demon, welcomed the change. He was tired of constantly fighting his darker impulses. Tired of having to remember who he was, as well as who he had been.
Angel hated the idea that the demon would win, and people would die, and yet, he knew that things would be different. People would die, there was no way around that, but he would live, truly live, and not just exist. His demon rejoiced at the thought. There was something calling to him, something beckoning him forward. There was no stopping it. He would try, but the demon in him knew, he would fail.
*******
Willow climbed out of the Shower, just as the phone started to ring. She opened the bathroom door, wearing only a towel. When she reached the living room, she found Cordelia's cordless phone floating in midair towards her. She took the phone and laughed, "Thanks."
"Hello?" She said into the phone as she walked back to the bathroom to finish getting ready.
"Willow?" Cordelia's voice sounded from the other side of the line.
"Cor, what's up?" She asked cheerily. She felt better than she had in months.
"I was just checking if you were still going to come by the office." There was something in Cordelia's voice that alerted the witch.
"Yeah. I should be there soon. Is something wrong?"
Willow asked as she finished drying off.
"No, not really." Cordelia paused, "Oh, but I was going to tell you, Buffy called."
Willow froze. "Buffy called? Why? Was she looking for me?"
Cordelia laughed. "Calm down. I don't know why she called, she didn't tell me. She wanted to speak to Angel. I think it was business. She didn't ask about you. I'm sure she doesn't know you're here. Hell, I'd be surprised if she even knows you're gone."
Cordelia laughed again. It was no secret that there was no love loss between the former cheerleader and the slayer.
Willow breathed a sigh of relief. "You're probably right. But, I'm gonna call Spike, just in case. I'll see you in a bit." She hung up the phone and finished getting dressed.
******
Angel appeared in the doorway just as Cordelia hung up the phone.
"Hey." She said, "How'd you sleep?" She asked, knowing he hadn't been sleeping well. Angel shook his head, "The same." He headed towards his office door. He walked in and then turned around and stepped back out.
"Any calls?"
Cordelia smiled at her boss and started to give him a report of everything that had gone on during the day. When she was done she paused. Angel could tell she was trying to decide whether to tell him something.
"Is there something else?" He asked. Cordelia nodded.
"Yeah. Buffy called." She paused, not knowing exactly how this information would effect Angel's tense mood.
"What did she want?" His tone was calm, somewhat indifferent. Almost as if Cordelia had told him that some stranger had called. She wasn't sure if he really didn't care, or that he was burying his emotions, as usual.
"She wanted to talk to you. She didn't tell me why, but it sound like a Hellmouthy sort of deal."
Angel breathed a sigh of relief. In the past few months he had found himself with less, and less patience, especially where Buffy and her friends were concerned. He didn't know exactly why that was. But as each sleepless day passed, he found himself feeling more and more cut off from Sunnydale, and everything that went on there. He didn't feel comfortable talking to them. That dull ache he had felt in his undead heart had even melted away. He tried to call it back, just to know that he was still feeling things, but he couldn't find it. However, Angel realized, that it wasn't his emotions that had been tempered, just some of the pain. He still felt things. He had strong feelings for Cordelia. She was like a younger sister. He wanted to protect her. She was the only person from his time in Sunnydale that didn't bring about a feeling a weariness. Well, Cordelia, and Willow. He missed the little hacker.
He hadn't spoken to her in several weeks, but he knew that she was having a difficult time. Living on the Hellmouth was difficult. It was taking its toll on her, if what Cordelia and his errant childe told him were true.
"Angel?" Cordelia brought him out of his thoughts. He shook his head and turned back to the brunette.
"Sorry. What did you tell her?" He asked, bringing his thoughts back to Buffy's phone call.
Cordelia grinned. "Nothing she wanted to here. I told her you weren't here, but that I could take a message." When Angel smiled at her lie, she continued, "I didn't think you really wanted to talk to her."
Angel shook his head, "No, that would not be my first choice." Angel turned around at the sound of the front door tot he office being opened. Wesley walked in with a newspaper in his hand.
"Oh, good, you're both here." He walked further into the room and set the newspaper down on Cordelia's desk.
"Look at this." He pointed to a picture in the newspaper. "Another body has been found."
*******
Spike woke up to the sound of the telephone ringing. He groaned.
"Yes?" He snapped into the line.
"Is that the way you always answer the telephone, blondie?" Willow giggled.
"Sorry, Luv. I was sleeping." He stood and made hisway into the kitchen.
'Sorry, but I wanted to call you, and see what's going on."
"Going on, pet?" He asked, confused.
"Yeah, Cordy said that Buffy called here. I just wanted to make sure it wasn't about me." Willow informed him as she put on her shoes.
"Not that I know of. I haven't spoken to her since before we left yesterday. "She called at the house?"
"No, the office." She told him.
"She probably wanted to talk to the bloody poof." Spike reassured her.
"Yeah, you're probably right. If you hear anything, call me. I have to go." She hung up the phone and left the house.
******
Buffy walked into the dorm room and looked around. She hadn't seen Willow in two days. She was starting to get worried. Willow had been acting strangely in the past few months. She hadn't been sleeping well, but Buffy figured that was due to all the Hellmouth activity.
When she looked at Willow's desk, and noticed her laptop was gone, she realized that maybe Willow had gone somewhere. *Oh well, I'll ask the gang tonight. * She thought to herself as she got ready for her afternoon date.
She needed a distraction. Speaking to Cordelia always put her in a bad mood. She didn't know how Angel could stand to work with her. She had wanted to ask if he had heard anything about the rash of demon activity in Sunnydale. She had been trying to get a hold of him for over a week. Each time she called, Cordelia would tell her he was out. Today was no different. She knew she had been lying. It was barely noon when she had called. Where would Angel have been? She was afraid that Cordelia wasn't giving him the messages. "Maybe I can have Willow call."
She thought aloud. "Yeah, that's what I'll do, when I find her that is." She smiled at her new plan of action as she finished dressing.
******
Angel was trying to pay attention to the conversation, but his mind just wasn't in the mood. The latest victim hadn't been any different than any of the others. There was nothing new. He knew he would have to go out hunting again that evening. Maybe he'd be lucky. Angel brought his attention back to Wesley, who was asking if Cordelia had had any new visions. Angel was waiting to hear her trademark response when some thing went through him. If was a feeling, he couldn't quite place. And energy that was nearby, calling to him. It was similar to the one he had felt last night. He concentrated on Cordelia, to see if it was her. But it wasn't coming from her, he was certain of it. It was close though, and getting closer. He heard the door to the office open, and turned around.
*****
Willow walked towards Angel's office building, feeling better than she had in months. She had slept all the way through the night. She hadn't had any dreams, which was strange, but she didn't question it. She felt good when she woke up. She felt alive, which made sense since she was alive, but she hadn't felt that way in months.
She smiled to herself as she remembered the strange feeling, which had overcome her the previous night. It was odd. It was like something was reaching out, to her very soul. It was a comfortable feeling though. She wasn't scared, just curious.
After the feeling had dissipated, she had felt strangely calm. * Don't analyze it, Rosenberg, * She told herself As she shook off the memory. She had just about convinced herself that she had imagined the whole thing when she felt it again. She wanted to stop, to see if the feeling was real, but her legs wouldn't obey, she was propelled forward, into Angel's office.
When she walked in, the feeling seemed to get stronger, it was coming to her in waves, but she couldn't pinpoint exactly where it was coming from. She shook it off, as she walked further into the room. She smiled at Cordy, and then looked to Angel, trying to gauge his mood.
"Angel." She smiled.
End Part 3
"Angel." Willow smiled.
"Willow" Angel walked towards her and enveloped her in a hug. "It's good to see you."
Willow pulled herself away from Angel's embrace. "You too." She couldn't tear her eyes away from him.
There was something about him that was calling to her. She didn't understand it. She had never felt this way around Angel before. She had never felt this need before. This desire. She wasn't even sure what it was she desired. It wasn't really Angel himself.
There was something there though, a presence she could feel. Something that hadn't been there before. She tried to shake it off. * This is Angel! You're imagining things! * She told herself.
"Well! I'm going to Lunch." Cordelia stood up and headed towards the door. "Wesley! Are you coming?"
She asked, sounding slightly exasperated. Wesley nodded, "Yeah, sure." He followed Cordelia out of the office, leaving the old friends alone.
*******
Cordelia hadn't been gone for more than five minutes when the telephone rang. Angel turned away from Willow to answer it.
"Angel Investigations." He asked into the line. After a moment, he groaned imperceptibly. "Yes. Hold on." He returned the receiver to its cradle after putting the call on hold, and turned to Willow, who was looking around the office.
"Willow? Excuse me. I need to take this phone call. Make yourself comfortable, and I'll be out in a few minutes." Willow nodded to him, as he retreated into his office.
******
"Hey guys!" Buffy smiled as she walked into Gile's living room. She flopped down on the couch next to Xander and Anya. Giles was sitting at his desk looking through some book.
"Hey, Buff! Where's Will?" Xander asked in between a mouthful of chips.
"I don't know. I was wondering if you knew." Buffy frowned.
Xander shook his head. "I haven't seen her since that freak attack in the park last week." Xander turned to his girlfriend for confirmation. Anya simply nodded. Buffy stood up and walked around the couch to Gile's desk.
"When was the last time you saw Willow, Giles?" Buffy asked her former watcher, growing concerned.
Giles took his glasses off, and leaned back against his chair. "I haven't seen her since the incident in the park, but I did speak to her yesterday. She sounded tired. She said something about spending a few days at her parents house." Giles smiled easily. Buffy relaxed a little.
"That must be where she is. It's funny, she didn't say anything to me about staying at her house." Buffy paused, "Oh, well. I'm sure she's fine. So, Who are we missing?" She asked the room in general.
"Deadboy Jr." Xander answered with his mouth full.
******
Angel hung us his telephone and sat at his desk for a moment. He had been having trouble concentrating during the phone call. He hadn't received any new information about his case. The lack of progress was putting him in a bad mood. He could feel the irritation throughout his entire body. Angel took a deep unneeded breath. He needed to relax. He didn't want to worry Willow.
The thought of Willow caused his demon to stir.
The feeling was almost overpowering. He realized that it was her that was calling out to his demon. That knowledge excited him, in a way he couldn't quite understand. It also made him nervous. He knew that his control was tenuous, at best. He should stay as far away from her as possible. But he didn't want her to get the wrong impression.
Angel stood up and walked across his office towards the door. He hadn't made it more than a few feet when he collapsed onto the floor. He felt a searing pain going through his body. He hadn't felt anything like it before. Yet, at the same time, some part of him recognized it for what it was.
He felt as thought his whole body was on fire.
There was an energy serge going through his body. It was painful, but exhilarating. He could feel the demon within him break free from it's chains. It tore them apart, and released itself from its prison. Then everything went black.
********
Willow walked over to Cordelia's desk, and peered down at the telephone. She noticed that the light was off, telling her that Angel's phone call was finished. She contemplated walking into his office, but then thought better of it. He was probably busy. He hadn't known she was coming, so she couldn't expect him to set aside all of his work, just because she had shown up. She decided to sit down and wait a little while longer.
After another fifteen minutes of sitting in silence, Willow decided to check up him. She walked over to his office door and knocked. At first there was no answer, so she knocked again, a little louder this time. When there still wasn't any answer, she walked in, expecting to see Angel sitting at his desk.
Instead, she found the room empty. She walked in a little further.
"Angel? Hello? Are you in here?" She walked up to his desk, and was surprised when she felt someone behind her. She wasn't sure how she had known. It wasn't a sound, which had alerted her. More like a feeling, a presence. It was strong. She recognized from somewhere deep inside her subconscious. It had been a long time since she'd felt anything like it, too long. She turned around, and came face to face with-
Before Willow could finish her thought, Angel grabbed her, and kissed
her. It wasn't a tender kiss. It was bruising, and full of a passion she
had
never associated with Angel. It brought back a lot of old feelings.
Old desires, and that's when she knew. He pulled away from her, and gazed
into her green eyes. "Willow."
She fought to catch her breath. "Angelus." Her voice was husky with the passion he had re-awakened with in her.
*******
Spike was on his way to Giles' house for
another boring night of slayage when he felt his knees
buckle underneath him. He was bombarded with a wave
of something he couldn't quite recognize. As quickly
as it had come, it was gone, and Spike was left with a
strange feeling of familiarity. She shook it off and
continued his walk towards the watcher's house.
******
Angelus was filled with pleasure at the realization that Willow knew who he was. He grinned at her.
"You know." It was a statement. Willow leaned back up against his desk, and stared into his eyes, not exactly sure what she was looking for. She knew that the knowledge that Angelus had returned should have frightened her. Terrified her beyond belief. But it didn't. Instead it brought back all those old feelings. She had been in love with Angelus. Not Angel, but Angelus. It was strange that she could so easily separate the two. She was never tempted to call Angelus Angel. She was never confused by their similar appearance. Ever since that night in the school. The night he had changed, she had known the difference. She had felt it, down to her very soul.
It had been two years since she had felt these feelings, but they hadn't lessened any. He still ignited a passion within her that she had never come close to feeling with anyone else.
"She realized that she was staring and broke her gaze away from his.
"You're back. How?" She took a look around, searching for a sign as to what had given him a moment of happiness.
Angelus chuckled. "It's nothing like that, Red."
Willow turned back to him, confusion in her green eyes.
"I broke out. Broke out of the chains soul-boy had me in. I'm not really sure how, but I'm not going to knock it. I'm back! Did you miss me?"
Willow smiled. "Yes, as a matter of fact, I did."
Angelus winked at her and grabbed her hand, and headed out of the office.
"Come."
End Part 4
Willow awoke in an empty bed she didn't recognize. She sat up in the bed and looked around. She was alone. She tried to remember where she was and what had happened. Her head was foggy was sleep. She lay back down against the pillows, and that's when it all came flooding back to her. Angelus. He had returned, and with him, all of her old desires had been sparked. She had always lusted after him. Despite the fact that he was death waiting to happen, she wanted him.
He stirred feelings in her that she had never dreamed of. She had never felt anything but friendship for Angel, but Angelus was another matter entirely. She had wanted him from the moment she found herself pressed up against him in the halls of the school two years before. The rational side of her knew that he was a killer, knew that he could only bring death, but a part of her hadn't cared. Even after Jenny Calendar had been killed, she still wanted him. A part of her died the night he was sent to hell. The night she had killed him. Willow knew that she had to restore his soul, their lives depended on it, but that didn't change the empty place in her heart his departure had left.
But he was back. She wasn't sure how, or why, and honestly she didn't care. She knew she should be afraid. He should frighten her beyond belief, but he didn't. She felt safe with him. Willow couldn't understand why that was. He was a killer. A demon. It didn't matter. He filled a void inside of her that she hadn't known was missing.
Willow climbed out of bed and took a look around. She had never been to Angel's apartment, never to his bedroom. Before, there had been no reason for her to come into his private space. Angel had never invited her, and truthfully, she had had no desire to come.
That had changed, Angel had changed, and so had she.
Willow realized that she had always wanted Angelus, but she never would
have acted on those feelings. Not before. There were too many reasons not
to. Too many reasons she wouldn't allow herself to. But, like all things,
people change. She had changed. She wasn't the same girl who had nearly
lost her life at his hands the night he changed. She wasn't the same girl
who had found her fish dead. She wasn't even the same girl who had restored
his soul. She realized that none of those things could have been helped,
nor would she want to change them. Each moment in her life had led her
to where she was now, and although she didn't know it until that very day,
she was exactly here she was
supposed to be.
Willow shook off her private thoughts and started to get dressed. She didn't know how she knew, but she knew that he was gone. She wanted to go home, back to Cordelia's, and take a shower, maybe grab something to eat, before Angelus returned, as she knew he would.
*******
Cordelia dropped Wesley off at his house before she headed back to the office. She hoped that Willow had had enough time to talk to Angel. She hoped that Willow would be able to help him with whatever was wrong. She smiled to herself when she remembered the way she had left her two friends. The energy in the room was almost tangible. She had never noticed it before, but there was major sparkage between her boss and her old friend. She hoped that they didn't let this opportunity slip away.
As she parked her car, Cordelia was thinking of ways she could help her two friends out, if they couldn't see what she could. She was smiling to herself as she entered the elevator. She had barely made it all the way into he lift when the vision came.
Her knees buckled under the pressure. The images were coming in flashes. Willow, Angel, Wesley, herself. And then everything went black.
Once the pain had subsided, Cordelia composed herself, and took the elevator up to the office, trying to make sense of the images. There was something different about Angel, but she couldn't quite place it.
The office was dark when she entered it. She walked over to her desk, and sat down for a minute. She lay her head down on her desk. Cordelia wasn't sure how long she had been sitting there when she heard the elevator. She looked up to see Wesley entering the office.
"Cordelia. Are you alright?" He asked as he entered stepped out of the elevator. "Yes, I'm fine." She told him, trying to decide whether she should tell him about her vision. The decision was made for her as Angel came out of his office.
"Wesley. What are you doing back here? Don't you have some sort of demon to hunt?" Angel chuckled. Cordelia stood up and walked around her desk, looking closely at her boss, trying to ascertain the difference she sensed in him. It was familiar.
"Angel? What's wrong with you? Have you been drinking?" Wesley asked as he looked as the vampire, obviously wounded by his comment as well as the mocking in his voice.
Angel looked at the former watcher for a second before turning his attention to Cordelia. "Wrong with me? Nothing. I haven't felt this good in- Well lets see how long has it been?' He asked the question more to himself, but the humor in his voice had not gone unnoticed.
"Two years." Cordelia's voice was quiet, barely above a whisper. Her mind was trying to reconcile the images she saw with the man she had known, the man that was standing before her now.
Angelus smirked at the girl and laughed out loud.
Wesley, who hadn't heard Cordelia's revelation, was confused. He had never seen Angel act this way, except maybe that time with Faith. And that's when it hit him. This wasn't Angel.
"Angelus." It was an accusation.
"Give the man a cigar!" Angelus chuckled. He turned back towards Cordelia, trying to gauge her reaction.
She seemed to be frozen in place, trying to decide what she would do, what she could do. When he turned back to Wesley, he noticed the man had headed back into the elevator.
"Now where do you think he's off to?" Angelus
asked, amused.
At the sound of his voice, Cordelia turned her gaze back towards Angelus.
"My guess? Sunnydale." When she noticed Angelus didn't seem to be particularly upset by this, she continued, "That doesn't bother you?"
Angelus shrugged. "I have more important things to do than worry about where that little weasel is running to."
"More important?" Cordelia asked, dreading the answer to her next question. "Like, killing me?"
"Technically." Angelus told her, "But don't worry, it won't be permanent."
******
Wesley ran as fast he could. He had been certain that Angelus would have followed him. It wasn't until he was about three blocks away, with no sight of the vampire that he realized that he had left Cordelia alone with the evil creature. * Good God! What have I done? * He asked himself. He knew he should probably go back, but he knew it was probably too late. Cordelia was dead by now.
Wesley was saddened by her death, but he knew that if there was any hope of ending this before it got too out of control, he had to get to Sunnydale, and tell the slayer. He had no doubt that Angelus would return there, to pick up where he had left off. They needed to form a plan. Either kill him, or complete the soul restoration. He only hoped that Giles could perform the spell, because he feared that Willow was already dead. She hadn't been in the office, and he had no doubt that Angelus would have already killed her.
*******
End Part 5
Wesley drove all the way to Sunnydale, breaking several speed limits. But time was of the utmost importance. He tried not to think about what had already happened, or what could happen.
When he reached the Sunnydale city limits, he noticed with mild interest that the 'welcome to Sunnydale' sign had still not been repaired. He drove straight to Giles' house, eager to rid himself of the weight on his shoulders.
He drove directly to Giles apartment. He braced himself as he knocked on the door. He had been prepared to face the wrath of the Scoobies, what with being the bringer of bad tiding, however he was not prepared for the person who opened the door.
*****
Spike had gone to Giles' to help with research, but he could shake the feeling that had overcome him on the way over. It was a familiar feeling, something that tugged at the back of his mind. He tried to place it, but was only succeeding in agitating himself.
Everyone was busy researching the latest hell spawn to enter Sunnydale. He suddenly wished he had stayed in L.A. with Willow. Working with the Slayer and her band of misfits was becoming an increasing nuisance.
If it hadn't been for Willow, he probably would have left already, implant or not.
He took a look around the watcher's small living room and had to fight down the urge to stake himself. He didn't know how is unlife had turned into such a mockery. There he was, William the Bloody, sitting in a room with the Slutty Slayer, a moron, a nympho, a farm-boy, and an out of work watcher. Researching some new evil, which he should be causing, while Sunnyhell's only saving grace was off in L.A. with his sire.
He was semi-seriously contemplating the best way to kill the moron with the least amount of pain when he heard the knock at the door. Actually it was more like a pounding, but the others were so immersed in what they were doing, they didn't appear to hear.
Spike just sat there for a moment, ignoring the insistent knocking, but after about five minutes, when it was apparent no one else was going to answer the door, he went to open it.
"What?" Spike snapped. The man on the other side was a watcher, he could tell. He looked like a younger, more idiotic version of Giles. The man appeared to be a little flustered at seeing him, which caused Spike to Snarl dangerously, just for fun.
"I, uh, I... Is Mr. Giles here?" Wesley asked, trying to gain control of his senses. He peered over the vampire, and seeing Giles and his charges breathed a sigh of relief. He turned back to the vampire, whom he recognized as William the Bloody.
"May I... May I come in?" He asked hesitantly.
Spike shrugged, and moved aside, prompting Wesley to run into the room. The people in the room had still failed to notice his presence.
"Mr. Giles." Wesley's voice was strained, as he remembered why he had come. "I have some bad news."
******
After Willow had showered and changed, she decided to grab something to eat before she went back to the Angel's office. She briefly wondered what would happen now. She couldn't see Angelus 'helping the hopeless'. It wasn't exactly his style. She giggled At the image of him saving some damsel in distress. Some part of her brain new that death awaited her and everyone she knew, but she was beyond caring. He completed her. That was the only thing she knew without a doubt. It didn't matter that he was a demon. A killer. It didn't matter that she would probably die at his hands. She would rather be dead, than without him. She knew that now. After coming to that rather startling realization, Willow accepted that whatever was to happen, was meant to be.
As she walked into the building, a feeling of cold washed over hear. It chilled her, but didn't scare her. She knew that Angelus was still gone. She couldn't feel him. But neither could she feel anything else. She walked into office, and cautiously took a look around. She found Cordelia sitting on her desk, looking bored. She didn't look different, but there was something off about her. As she looked her old friend over carefully, Willow realized what it was.
"He turned you." It was a statement.
Cordelia opened her mouth to say something, but wasn't exactly sure what she should say. Her sire had made it perfectly clear that Willow was off-limits. The part of her, not completely controlled by the demon, was pleased that Willow wouldn't die. She opened her mouth to speak, but shut it again, wary as to how Willow would take this new turn of events.
Willow walked over to Cordelia, and circled around her slowly, taking in her appearance, and her feel. Willow could sense her now. It wasn't like when she felt Angelus, but she felt her nonetheless. There was a bond there. S he could feel it tugging at her soul. It was similar to the one she felt with Spike, but different.
After circling the new vampire a couple of times, Willow grinned. "I like it."
Cordelia breathed an unneeded sigh of relief as Willow glanced around the office once more.
"Where is he?" Willow asked
"Dinner." Cordelia told her simply. Willow nodded.
"And Wesley? Whose dinner did he become?"
Cordelia grinned slyly. "Actually, we let him go."
Cordelia laughed at Willow's skeptical look.
"Really."
Willow's look of amusement turned to one of serious thought, as she mulled over this latest information.
"You realize that he's probably on his way to Sunnydale by now. He'll tell the others." Without waiting for Cordelia's response she grabbed the phone off the desk and started dialing Giles' number, hoping she wasn't too late.
******
Giles' stared at Wesley in disbelief. "Are you certain?"
Wesley nodded vehemently. "Yes, I'm afraid so."
The telephone rang disrupting the deathly silence that had enveloped the room.
"Spike" Giles turned to the vampire and waved him towards the phone.
"Oh, Bloody hell!" He snarled as he picked up the telephone. "What?" He snapped into the line.
"Spike?" Willow's voice was barely a whisper.
"W-" Spike started before Willow cut him off.
"Shh! I don't want them knowing it's me."
Spike closed his mouth, and waited for her to continue. He looked around the room, and noticed everyone was oblivious to his one-sided conversation, and moved silently up the stairs, and into the bathroom.
"Willow? Are you alright?" He asked once he had closed the door behind him.
Willow sighed audibly over the line. "Yeah, I'm fine. Is Wesley there? She asked hesitantly.
"Yeah. He just got here. That mans a bleeding idiot!"
Willow grinned. "Yeah. Did he say why he came?" She wasn't sure whether she wanted to hear his answer, but it was necessary.
Spike was silent for a moment, thinking over what Wesley had said. "You mean the bit about you being dead? Or the part about Angelus?" He asked, interested in hearing her side of things.
"What?" She screeched through the line. At first Spike was unsure what had made her react that way. Did she not know about Angelus? He figured that was why she didn't want the others to know it was her on the line.
"I'm not... I'm not.." She sputtered.
"Dead? No, seeing at your calling me, pet, I'd say
you weren't dead."
"Then why?" She asked growing confused.
"Wesley said that he came into the office to find Angelus. He ran, leaving that cheerleader chit behind. A pity really, I kind of liked. She almost staked me once." He grinned at the memory of her hold a crossbow to his heart.
Willow shook her head trying to take in everything.
"How soon can you get here?" She asked.
"If I leave now, a couple of hours."
"Can you get away?" She asked, hoping that her friends didn't cause a problem.
"Yeah." He started to hang up but then paused. "Tell peaches to behave himself. I don't want to stake him, but I will."
End Part 6
Willow had hung up the phone just as Angelus returned. She smiled at him. "Spike says to behave."
Angelus smirked. "Does he now? What fun is that?" He turned towards Cordelia. "What do you think of my new creation?"
"Impressive." She walked up to her lover and whispered in his ear. "I think your other childe will think so as well."
Angelus raised an eyebrow. "You think so?"
Willow giggled. "Definitely."
"Excuse me? Still in the room." Cordelia broke through their private conversation.
"So, Mom," She smirked at the title, "What did you find out? Did Wesley spoil our fun?" She pouted slightly; causing Willow to laugh at the expression which seemed slightly ridiculous on the vampire.
When the reality of the situation entered her mind, Willow’s expression became serious. "Wesley told them we were dead. Apparently he’s under the impression Angelus killed us both and is now on his way to Sunnydale to pick up where he left off." She told them.
Cordelia snorted. "Self-absorbed much?"
Angelus chuckled. He was pleased Cordelia hadn’t changed much. He had grown to admire her a great deal over the past several months. He turned to his newest child. "Delia, go get something to eat."
Cordelia stood up and walked around the desk, giving Willow and Angelus each a peck on the cheek. "Sure thing daddy."
She left the building in search of dinner. She had fed right after she awoke, but that was hours ago, and the hunger was returning. She found herself wandering the darkened streets, searching for a potential victim. She almost laughed at the irony when she saw a small group leaving a restaurant. A casting director, an agent, and a producer. They had been exceptionally harsh on her acting ability. With the wisdom she had gained through becoming Angelus’ childe, Cordelia realized that she was a horrible actress, however that didn’t change the thrill it would give her to drain their miserable little lives.
She stalked towards the trio as they waited for their car to be fetched. They never saw her coming. One minute they were standing there, chatting about some new commercial, and the next, Cordelia was upon them snarling. She pushed the producer, the largest of the three into the wall behind him, while grabbing the casting director around the throat, squeezing him into unconsciousness.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the agent try and escape. "Not so fast." She told the woman with a mocking tone to her voice. It was obvious she was enjoying herself immensely. "You can try and run. You won’t get far. But know this, if you run, you’ll die slowly."
The agent froze in fear, not doubting the truth of Cordelia’s words. Cordelia returned her attention back to the producer. Her hunger had come back full force now, and she had no desire to play with her food. She lowered her face to his neck, as her fangs elongated, and pierced the course flesh, draining him swiftly. When she felt his heart stop, she dropped him to the ground and turned to face the whimpering agent.
"You know, I should thank you." She smiled wickedly as her human features returned. "If it wasn't for your refusal to take me on as a client, I may not have run into Angel again." She was speaking more to herself than to the sniveling meal. The agents’ eyes grew wide as she watched Cordelia’s eyes glow gold.
"I’ll kill you quick." She whispered in her ear as she pierced the woman’s flesh, savoring the feel of the woman’s blood coursing through her. She stopped just before death and smirked. "You’re blood is tainted. Yummy." Cordelia thought about dropping the woman, and letting her die slowly as the blood seeped through her twin puncture marks, and then remembered her promise. She shrugged to herself as she snapped the woman’s neck, sending her into peaceful oblivion.
Once sated, Cordelia looked at the unconscious casting director. She was full, and not in the mood to drag him around with her, but it was such a waste to let the man live. She pulled out the blade Angelus had given her as an awakening present. It had an intricate design on the handle. She plunged the weapon into the unconscious man’s heart and smiled to herself.
Just as she had turned around the Vale’ approached with the car. It was a red convertible. She took the keys from the confused valet. "They won’t be needed it." She winked as she climbed behind the wheel and sped down the road, in search of some good old-fashioned fun.
*****
Angelus and Willow stared at one another for a long moment before they found themselves wrapped tightly around one another, their passion controlling them. Willow found herself pressed against the desk, as she divested Angelus of his clothing. Hers were soon to follow. Willow moaned as she felt Angelus hard shaft at her entrance. She moved her hands to his bare ass and pushed him into her, enjoying the friction the contact caused.
Angelus thrust into her, delighted in her moans of pleasure. Just before they had reached their mutual climax, Angelus sunk his fangs deep into her neck, draining her life away. He her scream out in pleasure as her life slipped away. He felt his own release as her heartbeat slowed. He bit into his own wrist savagely and offered his blood to her. She took his offering willingly, knowing what would come next.
Angelus detached himself from his mate as he carried her gently down to his bedroom, to wait for her to awaken. He looked at the clock and wondered how long it would take his errant childe to arrive.
****
Spike entered the city limits of Sunnydale and wondered what his Sire had planned. He could feel his presence. It was strong, powerful. But there was something different about it. Something he couldn’t quite place.
It wasn’t until he had hung up the phone and left the city limits of Sunnydale that Spike had begun to think about the feeling which had overcome him earlier. It was then that he realized what it was. It was Angelus’ demon breaking free from its confines. It beckoned to him, calling him home. And now, here he was, in Los Angeles. He wondered if they would take over here, or move on to new territory.
As he drove down the street, he felt this odd pull. A sensation he hadn’t felt in well over a hundred years. He turned the car down a side street, following the sensation. It led him to an alley behind a nightclub. He climbed out of the car, and decided to explore a bit. He was certain that Willow was fine. If Angelus had intended to kill her, she wouldn’t have lived long enough to make the phone call. No, he suspected Angelus had other plans for his friend. He chuckled. They were an interesting pair. If Angelus ever sired her, they would be a force to be reckoned with.
Spike strode into the club, and let his eyes wander to the dance floor. There were dozens of couples gyrating to the pulsing music. He wandered to the center of the platform, following the pull, as it became stronger. There was a woman moving to the music, oblivious to the eyes that watched her as she moved sensually. After watching her hips sway for a moment, Spike realized it was her he was feeling. He stepped closer to her, winding his arms around her. It wasn’t until he was full wrapped around her, and joining her in the sensual beat that he realized how cool her skin was to the touch. She spun around and smiled.
"Spike."
"Cordelia?"
End Part 7
"Spike" Cordelia purred as her hips swayed. She draped her arms around him and pressed her body against his.
Spike felt his body responding to her as he inhaled her unique scent. She smelled of leather, spice, and death. He grinned. "The pouf changed you."
Cordelia smiled widened. "Can you really call him a pouf, now?"
Spike chuckled as he joined her in the sensual dance. "I suppose not."
The couple danced in silence, letting the erotic music guide them. When the song ended, Cordelia stepped away from Spike and walked towards one corner of the club. Spike followed her. She leaned up against the wall and eyed him appreciatively.
"So, what brings you to L.A?" Cordelia smiled seductively at Spike.
Spike grinned. "Daddy dearest." He stepped closer to her. "Where is he anyway?"
Cordelia pressed her body up against Spike, her hands cupping his ass. She trailed kisses down his neck and nibbled at where his pulse should have been. Spike growled low in his throat.
"Busy." She growled. "With our new mommy." She claimed his lips in a fierce kiss.
*****
Buffy was shaking uncontrollably. "How could this happen?" She asked to no one in particular.
"I…I don’t know." Wesley stammered.
"I knew we should have killed him when we had the chance!" Xander yelled, still in shock from the news that two of his friends were dead.
"We can curse him again." Buffy spoke softly.
"And this would be why?" Xander snapped.
"It’s our best option. We don’t know what he is planning."
Xander sighed, knowing that they were right. "What do we need?"
*****
Willow opened her eyes to find Angelus staring at her. She smiled. "Hey. How long have I been out?"
"Not long." He handed her a wineglass filled with a thick red substance. Her new senses instantly recognized it as blood. She took the glass and drank it quickly, enjoying the feel of it sliding down her throat. Her demon rejoiced at all of the different flavors present.
"Human?" She asked as she handed the empty glass back to her mate.
"Of course. Nothing but the best for my Queen."
Willow climbed out of bed and looked at the familiar room with new eyes. She smiled as her newfound senses searched her surroundings. She closed her eyes and drew on her other senses.
"Spike’s here." She smiled broadly.
Angelus chuckled. He knew that the connection Willow had with his childer had strengthened when she was embraced. "What would you like to do first?"
"Take me hunting?" She pleaded. "Please?"
"Anything for you, Lover."
Willow smiled again. She went into the closet and pulled out one of Angelus’ velvet shirts, pulling it over her black jeans.
The couple left the office, eager for the night’s hunt.
*****
Several hours later, Spike strolled into the office and came face to face with his sire. He had this knowing grin on his face.
"Spike my boy, so good of you to come. I see you’ve met your sister." He inhaled deeply. "Oh yes, you’ve met" He chuckled as the scent of Spike and Cordelia’s coupling assaulted him.
"Where’s Red?" Spike asked looking around the room. He could sense her. He instantly knew she had been changed, and strangely, it didn’t bother him. It seemed right somehow.
"Packing."
"Ooh, are we going on a trip?" Cordelia asked, getting excited.
"Yes, we are." Willow came out into the lobby. Her eyes lit up when she saw Spike. "Spike!" She squealed, wrapping her arms around him in a hug. She sniffed, taking in his altered scent. She cast a knowing grin to Cordelia, and then turned around to face Angelus. "Told you. Wasn’t I right?" She asked as she walked over to him.
"Always my love." Angelus kissed her fiercely.
"So, mum, where are we going?" Spike asked when it didn’t seem like they were going to let up for air.
Willow pulled her lips away from Angelus and smiled mischievously at Spike. "Sunnyhell. He have some business with old friends, new enemies."
*****
"Buffy stormed into Giles house. "Spike’s missing." When Giles looked up she elaborated. "Willie said that he left town. I think he ran away. Didn’t want to face his ‘daddy’."
Anya snorted as she took a look at the ingredients of the spell. "This is a waste of time." She informed them. When they stared at her incredulously, she shrugged, "But it’s your time to waste."
"Yes, well, just get everything together. I’ll be ready to begin in an hour. Giles informed her."
When Anya was finished with her task, she left the Watchers apartment, and headed to one of the seedier areas of Sunnydale. She had a feeling that what Giles was planning was a waste of time. She didn’t know why Angelus had come back, and honestly, she wasn’t really concerned bout it. She didn’t know him, but from everything she had heard, she doubted that he would be coming back to Sunnydale to pick up where he left off, as the others had believed. If he did come back to Sunnydale it would be for another reason.
Another thing that bothered her was the deaths of Willow and Cordelia. She didn’t know Cordelia very well, but Anya wasn’t surprised to find out that Willow had been in LA and not at her parents’ house as Giles thought. Nor did she believe the two were killed. Everything she had heard about Angelus, both in the past and present, made her think that he had other plans in mind for the two girls.
And then there was Spike. Buffy believed he ran. Anya didn’t think that was very likely. She had gotten to know the blond vampire a little bit. Running didn’t seem to be his style. If he had gone anywhere, she believed it was to Los Angelus. To Angelus and to what Anya was sure would be a few additions to their vampire family.
"Anyanka." Anya spun around at the familiar voice.
"What brings you here? I heard you were slumming it with the humans now?" The demon asked with a grin.
Anya smiled broadly. "Sol, you old bastard. How long’s it been?
Sol shrugged. "Five hundred years, give or take. So, is it true? Are you mortal now? A sheep?"
Anya reached a hand around the demons thick throat, her nails digging into his rough skin. "Mortal, yes, never a sheep. That’s reserved for your kind." She hissed, her eyes flaring slightly with the power she still possessed despite her demotion.
Sol pushed her away slightly and grinned. "Still have that temper I see. What do you need?"
"Information. Vampires. Four of them. Two men, two women. The moment they come to town, I want to know."
"And what do I get in return for this favor?" Sol leered suggestively at him.
Anya reached into the man’s pocked and pulled out a sharp knife. Holding it against his chest, she spoke, "You get to live." She tucked the knife back into his pocket and walked away, leaving the demon breathing heavily.
"Demon, or no demon, that woman is crazy.’" He muttered.
*****
End Part 8
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