Part Six:

Buffy waited outside the library doors wondering what Giles had found out if anything. She knew her watcher had been up late burning the midnight oil. She'd seen the lights still burning after her last patrol. She walked into the library telling herself that she would be calm and cool and figure out a way to go on. She needed to deal with the fact that Angel and she were over, and she needed him to stay in Sunnydale to do it. She had to see him had to be near him, in order to get over this. Him leaving as he had talked of would only leaving her pining for something that she wasn't even sure was real.

She had loved Angel for so long and as intensely as her young heart could love that she couldn't be sure that was she was feeling was anything more then remembered. She didn't know if she was still in love with him she thought she was, but as Willow had once told her. Lovewasn't thought it was feeling which was why it made you do the wacky. She chuckled wondering if Willow had once more fallen asleep in Angel's arms and awoken this morning to his arms about her, the lack of breath and heart beat screaming who it was rather then frightening her.

Buffy sighed she wished she had gotten a chance to know that. To just cuddle with Angel, but it had always seemed as though they had no time, and in a sense she knew that was true. She was a slayer he a vampire as he had said to her there's was a forbidden thing. Taboo, Giles had tried to be a good watcher trying to steer her clear of what was looking more and more like a huge mistake on her part.

The other thing that bothered her wasn't that Angel was with Willow in fact if she let herself she could even understand it. They had grown closer had shared perhaps more then he had ever shared with Buffy. Willow knew stuff about Angel and with knowledge comes an intimacy that surpassed the physical.

That was the adult side of Buffy talking the side that would take over for the young woman she was, and the girl she had been. The teenager in her was angry spiteful even that Angel might be falling for Willow. Why would he want her that plain Jane? Only the problem was that she knew Willow wasn't a plain Jane had seen what Willow could be. Why would he want her when he can have you? Asked bitch voice in the back of her head. The same voice that had said not so long ago. Who cares if he's a vampire? He's hot and you want him, you're the slayer you can have what you want the world owes you at least that.

Only problem was it didn't owe her. She had lost Angel because they had tried to have something not for them. Damn Gypsies. Only she really couldn't blame them. She and Angel had been tentative then like moth to the flame. Each seeking the other neither aware of the burns that they received in their haste to touch and be. She smiled sadly.

She had wanted a lot of things had wanted Angel to be all of them, only now she was beginning to realize that she knew nothing of Angel, even less of him now then she did then.

They hadn't even really talked about what he must have gone through. She wondered if he'd told Willow, and what other secrets he'd allowed the hacker to know. She knew only a few things about Angel, she knew that he'd seen her the day she'd learned that she was the Slayer and her young life had been shattered. Loved you even then. Those words stuck in her mind. How could he have loved her he hadn't known her. She certainly hadn't loved him at first sight. Thought he was hot. Hey she had eyes. Even was intrigued by the mystery man act. It wasn't until later that she had started to entertain ideas like that about Angel in fact it was one of Willow's own words that had made her start.

Willow and her how about Angel. She chuckled softy to herself when she remembered mopping at the bronze. Then being attacked by the three and Angel and the rest was history. She wasn't sure now what had possessed her, Angel had wanted her he had admitted it. But now she wondered what it was about her that he really wanted. He wanted, she had thought her as a woman. Only she thought perhaps it was what she was as much if not more then who he had fallen in love with. He opposite his enemy.

With a sigh of resignation she pushed the doors to the library open ready to report to Giles.

The vampire had awakened earlier in the morning, partly because he had thought he felt Willow attempting to move. He was surprised when opening his eyes she was curled about him; Her warmth had permeated his dreams. Reminding him that he wasn't alone. It was a sensation he had thought he had gotten used to being with out; he hadn't realized how much he missed the warmth of another body. How much he had missed the feel of someone lying in his arms.

He watched as her eyes fluttered open and she stared at him uncertainly. Before a smile fluttered across her lips. He leaned down without thinking and pressed his lips to hers, stealing the smile with a sweet kiss. She gasped softly, too shocked to do more then stiffen slightly.

It took Angel a full minute to realize why she had stiffened and even longer to force himself to release her lips. So soft and paillet beneath his."Willow." he whispered her name hoping she didn't hate him for the trespass. He hadn't ment to do it. Okay maybe he had been thinking about it non stop sense she'd fallen asleep in his arms last night but she didn't need to know that. What kind of fool was he anyway? Lusting after a mortal woman that he could never hope to possess.

"S'okay..." she whispered and chuckled softly, "It was kind of nice. IN bad way." She giggled again, sitting up. She didn't know why she was laughing. The stress was finally getting to her. She decided or it could have been the shocked look on his face. "What little old Willow wasn't supposed to like being kissed by the big bad vampire." She was laughing and Angel only took slight offense. This the same woman that had told him that...what had she told him, that she thought he wasn't thinking clearly that she wasn't a substitute for Buffy.

"In fact," she added "I wouldn't object if you did it again." Willow said blushing softly as his eye locked with hers. He leaned down and captured her lips in a much longer, far more passionate version of what they had just shared. His lips were cool and soft as they slanted against hers; Their gentle pressure forced hers to part. His tongue tentatively swept past her now parted lips in search of hers. She whimpered softly as his tongue stroked against hers.

Willow had been kissed before. But nothing like the way Angel kissed. It wasn't tentative or uncertain. His lips demanded a response. Something she couldn't even remember feeling welled up deep inside her, passing out her lips in a strangely deep sigh of pleasure.

Angel lifted his mouth from hers and smiled, "I take it you liked that?" He demanded, his voice filled warm with humor and warmth.

"Hmm, Can I have another." She whispered dreamily. Making the vampire chuckle softly. His mouth met hers again. The kiss was just as deep but even sweeter as her arms slid around his neck pulling the vampire closer. He settled her back against the blankets allowing his weight to pin her gently beneath him.

His lips moved away from hers to slid down the side of her neck. She gasped and found herself arching against him as his lips moved wetly over the healing bite marks. She moaned helplessly as his suckled the soft flesh back into his mouth. He nipped gently marking her again as his own. She wiggled against him uncertain of whether she wanted to be closer or get away.

His mouth traveled lower over the base of her throat. Dropping warm wet kisses as he went. More she thought dazedly definitely more. Her hands wrapped themselves of there own accord into the vampire's spiky locks. She whimpered again as his cool breath moved over one of her breast before nuzzling along the underside. He nosed the shirt she wore to the side, placing a kiss on the swell of her breast.

She arched again uncontrollably as he sucked her nipple into his mouth. The hands in his hair tensed as she was caught between wanting and fear at the new sensation. She moaned out his name huskily. "Angel." Almost as though the sound of his name on her lips broke whatever spell had woven around the vampire and the witch. He drew back to look in her flushed face his eyes devouring the wet material of the silken bra she wore.

"Oh, my god Angel what are we doing?" She gasped pulling back from him and hurriedly sitting up. Angel watched her face changed watched the heat of passion turn to the pale whiteness of shock before embarrassment flooded her cheeks with red

What a fool he must think I am reacting like a cat in heat for his touch, after I said I didn't feel that way about him. Either that or he thinks I am easy.

"Willow it's okay we both got a little carried away." Angel tried to assure her never realizing that, those where the words she didn't want to hear. She could except that he hadn't met to take it that far she guessed it was just hard. "That's not true." He said suddenly looking deep into her gaze. "I meant to kiss you. I didn't mean to do anything you didn't want. I...I," He trailed off and licked his lips nervously an action Willow found herself following. This could be problem.

"Angel it's okay. I mean I sort of asked for it." She said softly." I am sleeping in your bed and..." Her words were cut off by his finger tips.

"That's nothing that you haven't done before. Willow we've been close for a while now. Closer then what I had ever thought you would let me get. I never met for my feelings for you to become what they have. Not because of Buffy or because I am a vampire or even because I could lose my soul, it was simply because I already loved you, I didn't want to ruin our friendship or make you distrust me because of how I felt about you."

"So that's why you never said anything and how can you say your soul isn't an issue." He chuckled at the incredulous look on her pretty face.

"This could take some explaining, so it's good thing that you don't have to go to school today." Angel said. "Before we start this are you hungry. There's some orange juice in the fridge, and I think I might even have some eggs. Bread." Angel trailed off at the shocked look on her face.

"What me vampire there for I can't have food in my house?" Angel demanded.

"But...but last night you..."

"No dinner food. Willow I have eggs and bread and juice somehow I thought you might like more then that." She laughed softly shaking her head.

"Sounds great I take it this means you can cook?" Willow asked skeptically. In her rather limited experience men couldn't cook to save there lives, her father for example couldn't boil water not that her never home mother was any better.

"Hey, I've had a lot of years to learn how." Angel defended. Making the hacker laugh.

Cook indeed. Willow had found with some shock that Angel not only could cook he was really good at it. She chuckled knowing she was gushing over eggs toast and bacon which he had found in his seldom used freezer. They had set on Angel's bed after that and she had listened to him explain. They had talked about his time in hell about what it had been like for him only know she learned in-depth what had happened over Christmas. She hadn't really been filled in about all the details to busy trying to win back Oz who in turn had dropped her for a pretty short skirt the first tour he went on. She remembered clearly Angel offering to beat him up for her. When she had cried herself to sleep in the vampires arms.

Angel confided in her that apparently the first had been a test from the powers that be. If he'd given in and drowned his pain and sorrow in Buffy as had been his first desire he would have died and the slayer with him. Because he'd beat the first preferring to meet the sun then harm Buffy or the others he'd proven himself worthy of the soul that he possessed

"So what you saying is that because you won they gave your soul to your for ever kind of like first prize?" She asked. Angel smiled softly at her. She was taking this far better then he'd thought she would. "But," she added, "that leaves us with one thing I don't understand. Why didn't you tell Buffy. I mean she loves you." Willow said.

"I didn't tell anyone. I wanted no one to know till I could tell what she really felt. I know now. Though she might call that love, and for her it might be. It's not what love really is. She's holding on the what had been, even when it didn't work. It's something she knows. The only thing holding on to me is doing for her is causing her pain. She needs to let go." Willow shook her head. She understood that part. She did. She hadn't wanted him to leave when he'd first told her he thought it was for the best. But she could see his reasoning.

"So what changed. Angel you could have left here and we wouldn't be having this conversation and we wouldn't be wondering where we go from here."

"They tried to kill you and I wasn't there to help. I could have lost you." He said simply. "I almost did."

She smiled a soft blush coloring her cheeks. She remembered that night after everything had calmed down, he'd come to her balcony and held her for what seemed like hours refusing to let go.

"It's really true then your soul is yours I mean you know it is?" Willow asked not really believing him, yet not sure why he would lie.

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