"That bitch!" Buffy hissed as she entered Willow's hospital room.  That morning, as promised, Willow was deemed well enough to move from ICU to a private room.

"Buffy?" Giles frowned at her.  For a heart-stopping moment he thought that she might somehow know about the things Angel had told him last night.  He dreaded the time when Angel would tell her, but it had to be done.

"Tara!" Buffy glanced at Angel.  He hadn't even looked up when she entered the room.  Instead, his sole focus was Willow.  He was whispering to her quietly while playing with her hair.  "That bitch left Willow.  I went to their place to pick up the things you asked me to and I found this." Buffy waved a piece of paper around before shoving the offensive thing at Giles.  "I can't believe her!  She just packed up and left and after everything Willow did for her, standing by her when she went looney tunes because of Glory.  How could she do this?"

"I don't know, Buffy."  Giles folded the note.  He watched Angel nuzzle Willow's ear as he whispered to her.  Actually, he had an idea.  Tara wasn't the type of girl to fight for a lost cause and she must have sensed something of the connection between Willow and Angel.  From her note, Giles also knew that Tara had convinced herself that Willow was dead.  Perhaps it was preferable to the alternative of her relationship with Willow slowing dying as her bond with Angel grew.  Giles had no doubt that the bond between the vampire and witch would grow and their feelings with it, the way Angel was behaving was proof enough that he wouldn't voluntarily shut the link down again.

If she was really honest with herself, Buffy knew that her righteous indignation over Tara's abandonment was not all on Willow's behalf.  She was angry with Tara for leaving because she was supposed to stop this madness.  With Tara around, Angel would have had to step aside and let her sit with Willow and whisper encouragement.  If Tara had been there, Angel couldn't be so damn convincing in his assumed role as Willow's husband.  He still hadn't looked up.  There was a time when Angel's gaze never left her when she was in a room.  "Angel, how is Willow doing?  Are you hungry?  Because I can go to Willie's."

"I'm fine.  Willow's getting stronger." Angel kissed Willow's forehead and stood up.  He didn't want to have this conversation with Buffy, especially in front of Willow.  He was afraid that when Buffy became upset it would unsettle her.  "Could I speak to you outside the room for a moment, Buffy?"

"Sure." Buffy brightened.  Angel wanted to talk to her!  He would probably explain his behavior with Willow, let her know that he was protecting her because she was her best friend and had saved her life. Buffy set Willow's suitcase down and bounced out of the room.

The hall was deserted.  Angel let the door to Willow's room shut slowly.  He didn't want to leave her, but this had to be done.  "Buffy, we have to talk about Willow."

"It's okay, Angel.  I was hurt at first that you were pretending to be her husband, but I understand now.  She's my best friend and you're protecting her for me.  Thank you."  Buffy touched Angel's arm.  She reached up and pecked his cheek.  She wished she could do more, but there was the whole 'husband' charade to keep up.

He was afraid of this, that Buffy would make up reasons and explanations in her mind before he had a chance to tell her how he felt.  Angel loved Buffy, he really did, but he wasn't surprised to find that he loved her in a distant, first love way.  He had begun to realize that his love for Buffy was fading into memory when he had come to comfort her at her mother's grave.  It hadn't been a heart wrenching experience to leave her.  He had to face it, somewhere along
the line, he wasn't sure when - it could have been before he left Sunnydale, after he had left, or just in the last few days - but he had let go of Buffy and had fallen in love with Willow.  He admitted that to himself, but he wasn't about to tell anyone else - especially Buffy.

"Buffy, I'm not doing this for you.  I'm doing this for Willow because I know she's still with us and that she'll get better." Angel looked at Buffy to gauge her reaction so far.  She was a bit perplexed, a small wrinkle above her brow marring her complexion.  The good thing was that she wasn't mad.  Yet.  "I know this because I can feel her soul.  When Willow did the soul restoration it created a connection between our souls.  She wasn't aware of it and I never told her.  It was part of the reason why I left Sunnydale, it was easier for me to shut out what Willow was feeling being so far away from her."

"Oh," was all Buffy could manage.  The man - vampire - she considered her soulmate was connected to her best friend's soul.  How was she going to handle this?

"There's more."

"Really." Buffy braced herself.

"In the Book of Lost Souls, Willow found another clause to my curse. It would make my soul permanent."  He watched Buffy's face light up and stopped her from throwing herself into his arms.  He gripped her shoulders.  "A while ago this law firm I've been battling brought back Darla, as a human.  I tried to help her, but I failed.  Dru turned her. I let them kill people - evil people, but still people.  I fired Wesley, Gunn, and Cordy and became obsessed with destroying Darla, Dru, and Wolfram and Hart.  I wanted them all dead.  I hit bottom. I knew complete despair and it made my soul permanent."

"Angel that's wonderful.  I mean, I'm sorry you had to go through all that, but it was for the best.  Your soul is permanent."  Buffy tried to move closer, but Angel kept her at arm's length.  She didn't understand.  They could be together now.  Love each other.  There was nothing to stand in their way.

"I had sex with Darla."

Except that.  How could he have...And with her?  She was a vampire, but so was Angel.  "Only once?"  At Angel's nod, Buffy sighed.  It wasn't like it had been a relationship.  He hadn't loved Darla, it had been just sex.  Sex that made it possible for them to be together.  And she really couldn't judge when she had been with Riley.  "Well, like I said, your soul is permanent and that's all that matters.  We can be together."

"No."  Angel didn't like doing this, hurting Buffy and dashing her hopes, but she had a right to know.  Maybe now that she knew his soul was permanent and that their relationship still wouldn't work, she could truly move on.  "I'm still a vampire and you're still a slayer."

"That didn't stop us from falling in love." Tears flowed freely down Buffy's cheeks.  She gulped to get air into her lungs.  Angel didn't want her.  He didn't love her.

"I know, but you deserve so much more, Buffy.  You deserve to have someone love you without guilt.  There's too much in the past for us to start again.  I want you to find that person who can give you that normalcy you crave so badly."  Angel let go of Buffy's shoulders.  Sobs shook her small frame, but he didn't reach out to comfort her.  It wasn't his place anymore.  "I'm taking Willow to L. A."

"What?" Buffy snapped out of her grief.  She had to have heard him wrong.  Angel did not just say that he was taking her best friend away from her.  "Willow's staying here."

"It isn't safe for Willow on the Hellmouth.  Last night a Bultak demon tried to kill her and steal her power.  Her supernatural abilities are attracting demons now that its dormant."

"We can protect her here.  I can protect her."

"She'll be safer in Los Angeles."  This was the one thing that had always irked him about Buffy, her stubborn selfishness.  She saw him in L. A. with Willow rather than Willow safe and away from the Hellmouth. "In L. A., her power will be muted and the demons won't be able to track her as easily.  If she stays here, every demon within the town's radius will be drawn to her.  You can't protect her from all of them. Do you want to take the chance that one of them might kill her?  Do you want to be responsible for Willow's death?"  Angel knew he was being harsh, but that was the only way to get through to Buffy.  She would never do anything that would jeopardize Willow's life.

"And what does Xander think of your wonderful plan?" Buffy placed her hands on her hips.  It was obvious that her protests would be ignored and that Giles had already agreed to this insanity.  Xander was her last hope.  He might have backed Angel when he lied about being Willow's husband, but he would never trust Angel enough to let him take her away and keep her safe.  He hated Angel.

"I'm fine with it." Xander stepped around the corner.  He had left to see Anya that morning and tell her about the plan he, Angel, and Giles had come up with and had returned around the time Angel and Buffy had stepped out into the hall.  He had hung back, not wanting to interrupt, but not wanting to leave either.  He was curious about how much Angel would tell Buffy.  He hadn't actually expected the vampire to effectively break up with the slayer and firmly close the door on their relationship.  His feelings for Willow did run deep.  "Deadboy and his crew will keep Willow safe in L. A.  He knows I'll stake him if he
doesn't."  He smiled to soften his words and to let Angel know that he did trust him.

"The doctor gave his okay and I've got Cordy setting things up in L. A."

"How can you protect her in a hospital in L. A. any better than we can protect her here?" Buffy threw her hands up.  Without Xander's support, she was knew that she was looking more and more like a jealous harpy, but she couldn't stop herself.  She remembered the moment that she had shoved that sword into Angel's gut and sent him to hell like it was yesterday.  The pain of losing him so violently and with what she had thought, such finality, had been indescrib- able.  It still haunted her. When he had left her the second time, the pain had been different because she had known that somehow, someday they would be together. They had a second chance.  She wasn't going to give it up.  She wasn't going to let him go.  She couldn't feel that pain again.  It would kill her.  "We can protect Willow together.  You can't leave, Angel, we have a second chance."

"We don't have a second chance, Buffy.  I have a second chance.  You have a second chance.  There's no we involved."  Angel looked sadly at the young woman he had once loved to the exclusion of all else.  He wasn't an idiot, he didn't expect Willow to wake up and love him.  She had no idea of his feelings for her and had been in love with someone else, so he wasn't giving up Buffy because of Willow.  He and Buffy should have done this ages ago, but neither of them had been strong enough.  It had been easier to believe that it was the curse that kept them apart, but they couldn't do that anymore.  "The ambulance is transporting us to L. A. in an hour.  Xander is following in my car and Anya will pick him up later.  Good-bye, Buffy."

It couldn't be that easy for him.  He couldn't just say good-bye like that and mean it.  Buffy turned and walked away.  She wouldn't say good-bye.  She couldn't.

*****

The place was spotless.  The Hyperion's lobby gleamed, but still Cordelia fretted about, dusting the odd speck of invisible dirt.  She was nervous.  Angel was bringing Willow back with him and she was hurt. He had called and explained everything.  How Willow had brought Buffy back to life, how she had collapsed and almost died, how he had pretended to be her husband to keep her on life support, how the demons were attracted to her power because of the  hellmouth, and - the double whammy - how his soul was permanent and connected to Willow's.  It had been quite the telephone conversation.

"It's okay, Cordelia," Wesley said quietly from his chair in the corner.  "He's still the same Angel."

"Except that he has a permanent soul and is connected to Willow.  I wonder how Buffy swallowed that one?"

"Considering that the girl brought her back to life and is her best friend, shouldn't she be okay with it?" Gunn asked.  He didn't know too much about the Sunnydale people.  He had asked Cordelia and Wesley a few questions after Willow's witchy display, but he still didn't have all the players straight.

"You don't know Buffy.  When it comes to Angel, she's obsessive-possessive."  The front door opening stopped Cordelia from saying anything further.  Angel escorted in two paramedics who had Willow on a stretcher.  "Angel." Cordelia immediately walked over to them.

"Is everything ready?" Angel led them toward the elevator.  He nodded a greeting to Wesley and Gunn.

"Yes, the room's ready." Cordelia followed along, trying not to stare at Willow.  She was ghastly pale and something had to be done about the dark blue bruise-like smudges under her eyes.  "I also called David Nabbit.  He's arranged for a private nurse to come check on Willow as often as necessary until she's well.  She'll be here in an hour." Cordelia watched Angel closely as he oversaw the paramedics transfering Willow to the bed.  The conversation she'd had with Xander when she had called him after talking to Angel was actually looking true.  Maybe she should apologize for calling him a moron.  She had thought Xander had been overstating things, but it looked like Angel did have feelings for Willow, of the more-than-friends variety.

"Thanks, Cordelia." Angel smiled at her.

"No problem.  Willow is my friend too and I want her to get well." Cordelia hesitantly moved to the side of the bed as the paramedics left.  This was way too reminiscent of when Willow had been in the hospital and restored Angel's soul.  She looked so vulnerable.  "She is going to get well."

It was a statement, not a question and Angel was thankful that someone shared his certainty.  There was too much fear in the others for them to be sure of Willow's recovery.  They were afraid that if they didn't prepare themselves on some level for her death, they would be devastated when it happened.  Angel couldn't fault them for it, but it was another reason for Willow to be out of Sunnydale.  "Thank you, Cordelia." Angel enveloped his Seer in a hug.  She was his best friend.

"Well, a girl can never get too much thanks."

"Angel, how's Willow?" Xander walked into the room.  He experienced a brief stab of jealousy at the sight of his ex-girlfriend hugging Angel. First Buffy, then Willow, and now Cordelia - how mature did the vampire think he had gotten in the last year?  The guy was lucky he was head over heels for Anya.  Xander shook his head and decided to ignore Angel and Cordelia's closeness.  He knew it was platonic, Angel's feelings for Willow precluded anything else.  "Hi, Cordelia."

"Hi, Xander.  Willow's all settled in.  I've arranged for a nurse to come by and check her."  Cordelia gave her ex-boyfriend a tentative hug.  "We'll take good care of her."

"I know you will."  Xander moved closer to Willow and leaned down to talk to her.  "I have to get back to Sunnydale, Wils, but I know you'll be fine.  I'll visit every weekend and next time I expect you to hold up your end of the conversation, okay."  He kissed her forehead.  "I love you."

"Hey, Xander, why don't you catch me up on the Sunnydale news while we wait for Anya downstairs." Cordelia ushered Xander out of the room. Angel was starting to fidget and she guessed he needed some time alone with Willow.  "Maybe we can even tell Gunn embarrassing stories about Wesley when he first came to Sunnydale."

"Like how you used to drool over him?"

"Not embarrassing to me!  I swear, Xander, if you say one word about that then I'm telling Anya about...." Cordelia's threat was cut off as Angel shut the door.

They were finally alone.  Angel took off his jacket and shoes and sat on the edge of his bed beside Willow.  Her soul no longer flickered through the link.  It was as steady as her heartbeat.  He took that as a sign that their bond was getting stronger.  He took Willow's hand. Angel leaned down and pressed a kiss to Willow's lips.  He laid his head down on the pillow beside hers and curled himself around her body. "Welcome home, mo ionuin bean.  My beloved wife."
 

~Part Seven~

The sewers didn't bother him this morning.  Usually when Angel descended into the sewers after a night of fighting evil with Gunn and Wesley while they left in the sunlight, he felt depressed.  But lately, he hadn't been down or broody at all.  Every morning, he went home to Willow.  Angel skipped away from a few beams of sunlight that streamed through a grate.  He grinned.  The hotel was only a couple of feet away.

"Hey, Angel," Cordelia greeted him as she exited the kitchen and he entered through the sewer entrance.  "Long night?"

"Yes.  We spent hours at that damn club before those kids left and were attacked.  Next time, be a dear, and get a time from the PTB."

"Sure, no problem, and while I'm at it I'll just ask for the names and addresses of future victims and that way we can avoid the brain pain visions too." Cordelia smirked at her boss.  She liked giddy, happy Angel with a sense of humor.  It was much better than broody, obsessive Angel with a tendency to fire his friends.  She had had a long talk with Willow about the whole Angel/Darla situation and she felt a lot better about it.  Willow was such a good listener.  "So, what else happened?  Because I know it didn't take you guys all night to dust a gang of vampires.  I hope you weren't picking up girls, you are a married man, you know."

Angel grinned.  He was a married man.  He wasn't even trying to convince himself that it wasn't true.  Surprisingly, Cordelia not only allowed him to entertain his lies, but she encouraged it as well.  "We ran into a nest of pissed off Bramson demons.  How is Willow?" Angel grabbed a cup of coffee.  This was the first time in the four days Willow had been in L. A. that he had left her all night.

"She's fine, still in a coma though.  Fred's up there keeping her company right now.  She came in early this morning because I have an audition in an hour." Cordelia gathered her things from her desk. "She'll answer the phones while I'm out.  I should be back before noon. Sleep well."

"Thanks.  Break a leg." Angel took the stairs three at a time.  He reached his room and he could hear Fred's voice through the closed door.  He rapped lightly before entering so he wouldn't scare the still jumpy girl.  "Hi, Fred."

"Angel.  Hi." Fred scrambled up from the chair by Willow's bedside. She clutched a large book to her chest.  Her eyes darted up to meet his before focusing on the floor.  "Cordelia said you would be back soon... that I wouldn't have to stay very long...but I don't mind."

"Thanks for your help, Fred.  Were you reading to Willow?" Angel took off his jacket and hung it in the closet.  He didn't really want to make small talk with Fred, but he didn't want to be rude or hurt her feelings.  Fred was still adjusting to life back in their world and she was fragile.  They were her only friends who would understand what she'd been through and not think she was crazy.

"Yes." Fred smiled.  She really like Angel, Cordelia, Wesley, and Gunn. She was even warming up to Lorne, though it was hard because he was one
of Them from the Bad Place.  The red haired girl, Willow, had scared her when she had first saw her, but Cordelia had explained how her best friend had just died and that she was a good witch.  Now she was hurt because she had brought her best friend back to life and Fred wanted to help her new friends.  Besides, it was so clear that Angel loved Willow and she wanted Angel to be happy.  "It's a physics textbook.  Cordelia said that Willow is really smart and I thought she might like to listen to something not written in Cosmo."

"Yeah, I think Willow would find your choice of reading material more stimulating than Cordelia's.  Although, I'm sure she enjoys both." He smiled when Fred practically beamed from his compliment.

"I'll go downstairs now and look after the office until Cordelia gets back." Fred ducked her head and left the room, shutting the door softly behind her.

This was fast becoming his favorite time and place.  The early morning hours alone in his room with Willow.  The only thing that would make it
perfect would be seeing Willow's beautiful green eyes and hearing her sweet voice.  Angel kissed her lips, every time he hoped she would wake up like one of the princesses in the stories his Mother used to tell him.  "Good morning, Ionuin." Her hair was soft and she smelled like raspberries.  With the help of Fred and the private nurse, Cordelia took care of Willow's personal hygiene.  She refused to let Angel have any part in helping with that because she knew it would embarrass Willow when she woke up.

There was one thing that they let Angel take care of - Willow's physical therapy.  Angel removed the sheet that covered Willow's body. She was wearing a baby blue tank top and pajama boxers.  He moved to the end of the bed and picked up Willow's foot.  He massaged it thoroughly before moving onto her calf.  Next he bent her leg and straightened it in gentle motions, working the muscles.  While he did this, he told her about his night.  He told her about the demons they fought, the kids they saved, how he felt about everything that happened, and the things that he, Wesley and Gunn talked about while they had waited for the kids to leave the club.  He told her everything while he worked to keep the muscles of her limbs strong and supple.

After that was accomplished came Angel's favorite part of their routine.  He stripped down to his boxers and climbed into bed with Willow.  He lay beside her and talked, but this time the things he said had nothing to do with reality.  He knew it was wrong, but at this time he told Willow stories of their fake courtship.  He couldn't stop himself from indulging in the fantasy and he figured the only real harm he was doing was to himself.  It was his heart that would break when Willow woke up and returned to her real life.

"Do you remember the first time I told you I loved you?" Angel whispered softly.  His finger repeatedly traced the sweep of Willow's hair from the roots at her forehead to the end of the strands laying on her pillow.  "I had known it for a long time before I told you, I just didn't know how to say it or if I should.  You are so beautiful and perfect and I didn't think I deserved you.  I don't deserve you.  I know, I know, I'm not supposed to talk like that or even think such a thing.  I was so nervous, I wanted everything to be perfect."

Just as when he had told Willow's mother about his faux proposal, Angel could picture it clearly.  It was like it was an actual memory of something that had happened.  He briefly wondered if that was the work of the soul bond.  If these were events that should have and would have taken place if he hadn't shut it down and not just ramblings from his overactive imagination.

"I had this whole elaborate date in mind," Angel continued his story. "First dinner at an expensive restaurant and then a romantic boat ride where we would sip champagne until we reached this beach side inn.  Our room would be decorated with roses and candles and then I would tell you.  But you wouldn't co-operate.  When you arrived in L. A. for the weekend all you wanted to do was take a walk along the beach in your bare feet and look at the stars.  I could never say no to you.  You looked stunning standing in the surf with your skirt hiked up past your knees.  I couldn't help myself, I told you I loved you.  You smiled at me calmly, the wind ruffling your hair, and you said you loved me too and wasn't this better than some stuffy restaurant.  Your lips tasted salty from the ocean air and sweet because they were your lips and by the time we got back to the hotel before sunrise, our clothes were soaked." Angel smiled and drifted off to sleep with images of making love to Willow on the beach as the waves caressed their skin.

*****

The Power was gone.  Phife had woken up one evening to find the sweet smell no longer wafting around the Hellmouth.  At first he had thought
that another lucky demon had beat him to it and that the witch was dead.  After hanging out at the hospital, he learned that the witch's loving 'husband' had taken her home.  It had been easy information to pick up, the handsome vampire and pretty witch were the hot topic on the hospital grapevine.  Angel's love and devotion to his 'wife' was becoming a thing of legend or at least a really good romance novel.

Now that the Power was no longer residing on the Hellmouth, Phife knew that he no longer had any competition.  No other demon would go through
the bother of tracking the witch, most would assume she was dead and the rest would lack two key pieces of information.  One, the witch was
with Angel, and two, Angel lived in L.A.

Phife grinned.  He was going to Hollywood!  Maybe he would be discovered and become a movie star.  Or maybe he would just eat one.

*****

The silence in the room was oppressive.  They were gathered at the Magic Box - Giles, Buffy, Dawn, Spike, Xander, and Anya - to research a new demon that had popped up on the previous night's patrol. Everyone was trying very hard not to stare at the empty seat in front of the computer.

"I miss Willow," Dawn voiced the thought everyone was thinking.  "It's not the same without her.  Or Tara."

"Course it isn't L'il Bit." Spike mussed Dawn's hair.  "Now we have to actually look for the answers and not just have Red tell them to us." To tell the truth, he actually did find himself missing the little witch.  He hadn't noticed it before, but Willow was the only one, besides Dawn, who would give him the time of day.  Buffy never even bothered to mutter a hello when she saw him.  She was always too caught up in her own dramas - the current one being Willow in L. A. with Angel.  To his utter disgust, Spike couldn't even bring himself to be mad or jealous of the Poof.  Instead he actually missed him.

"Why don't we go with Xander when he visits Willow on the weekend?" Buffy tried to suggest casually.

"You want to go to L. A.?  To Angel's?" Dawn looked at her sister with wide, uncertain eyes.  She missed Willow and she wanted to see her, but she wasn't sure that she wanted Buffy to see Angel.

"Of course.  That's where Willow is." Buffy turned her attention back to the book in her lap.  Angel had said that she had a second chance and she was going to use it to get him back.  Once Willow woke up, she would go back to Tara and Angel would see that his infatuation with her was a lost cause.  Buffy had to be there to remind him that their love was real and forever.

*****

"Wonderful." Cordelia rolled her eyes as she hung up the phone.  "The Great Buffy the Vampire Slayer will be joining Xander when he visits Willow this weekend."

"Isn't Willow her best friend?" Fred frowned.  She could tell that Cordelia didn't care for this Buffy, mostly because Cordelia had said that she didn't like Buffy.  But, Buffy was Willow's friend and Angel's ex-girlfriend.  She couldn't be that bad.

"I don't know about you, Fred, but I can't wait to meet Buffy," Gunn voiced her thought as he sat down on the arm of the couch she was sitting on.  "She sounds like a piece of work."

"Yeah, she does sound interesting."

"Interesting, self-centered, Angel obsessed..." Cordelia caught sight of Angel making his way downstairs.  "Hey, Angel, did you sleep well? Buffy's coming to visit with Xander this weekend."

"What?" It took a few moments for the meaning behind Cordelia's words to pierce his sleep fogged brain.  "Damn!  I thought she actually listened to me this time."

"Buffy could be coming to visit Miss Rosenberg.  She is hurt because she brought the slayer back to life.  She might not be coming here to see you, Angel," Wesley suggested.

Angel and Cordelia both snorted at Wesley's interpretation of Buffy's motives.  "Thanks for trying to keep me humble, Wes, but Buffy knows my soul is permanent.  She thinks we have a second chance.  I know she cares for Willow and probably does want to see her, but she'll also use this opportunity to try to renew our relationship."

"Can I call her back and tell her she can't come?  There's no room at the inn?" Cordelia picked up the telephone receiver.  Angel shook his head, so she pouted as she replaced it.  "Well, if Buffy is going to be here throwing herself at you, then I need the weekend off.  I watched that for three years and I don't need to see the sequel."

"That's not going to happen." Angel sighed.  "I guess I'll just have to be more clear the next time Buffy and I talk."

"Why don't you just tell her that you love Willow now." Fred recoiled at the stunned looks directed her way.  "Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot we weren't supposed to say that out loud."

*****

That hit the spot.  Phife slurped the marrow from the last bone of the demon who had so helpfully informed him to stay away from the Hyperion
Hotel because a vampire named Angel who killed demons lived there.  He had even given him directions to the place.  Phife rotated his ear. He hadn't needed directions, as soon as he had materialized in Los Angeles, he had caught the sweet, lovely scent of the Power.  He waved his long, sharp-clawed finger in intricate motions in the air while he muttered a chant.  In a whirl of dust, his deformed figure dissolved from his place in the alley and manifested in an alley just behind the Hyperion.  Not for the first time, Phife wished that his teleportation spell could materialize him within buildings, but there was too much danger of becoming a part of the building instead.

It took him a few moments to come up with a plan of attack.  The late afternoon sun still shone in the sky, so Angel had to be at home. Entering the hotel through the sewers was too risky, if the vampire did leave he would use them.  The back entrance was his best bet. Slip up the back stairs and into the little witch's room.  She would be dead before Angel even knew she was in danger.

*****

No one knew what to say after Fred's apology.  They had all realized Angel's feelings, he had hardly tried to hide them and there was no one here who actually thought he was her husband.  The reason why none of them had said anything was they weren't sure if Angel knew how he felt about the comatose witch.

"I can't tell Buffy that, Fred," Angel said gently.  "I would rather we kept it between ourselves.  When Willow wakes up, she's not going to feel the same way.  She'll go back to Sunnydale and I don't want there to be any tension there for her because of me."

"Oh, Angel." Cordelia immediately got up and moved to the vampire so she could hug him.  It wasn't fair.  Now that her friend could be happy because his soul was secure, he couldn't be happy because the woman he loved was oblivious.

"Thanks.  I'm going to go check on Willow.  What time is the nurse supposed to be here?"

"Seven."

Good, that would give him enough time.  Now that he had been forced to contemplate reality, he had this unescapable need to be with Willow.
He needed to smell her, touch her, hear her heart beat, and feel her soul through the link while he could.  Before she went away and left him alone.

*****

Phife smothered a cry of glee as he found the witch alone in a room. She lay still and helpless on a large bed.  He climbed up and bent over her.  Her skin was so white and delicate.  She was quite ugly. Phife's ear twitched on top of his head.  The Power was so close.  He traced a line across the witch's throat with his claw, but didn't break the skin.  His forked tongue flickered out and touched her cheek. From the short, sharp claws on his two fingers, larger talons unsheathed.

A feral growl behind him alerted Phife to the vampire's presence, but too late.  He sailed across the room and hit the wall.  His ear crumpled and bent over in a broken angle.  Phife screeched.

Angel was about to attack the weirdly deformed demon, that vaguely reminded him of Yoda, to rip its lumpy head from its shoulders when it screamed.  The sound perforated his brain with dagger proficiency and he clapped his hands over his ears and barreled toward the thing. As he got closer, the pain increased and Angel fell to his knees.  He looked up to see two claws going for his throat.  Abruptly, the sound and the claws disappeared in a crackling swirl of blue fire.  Angel slowly took his hands from his ears.

"Angel?" Willow's soft voice was a soothing balm to his sense of hearing. "Are you okay?"

"Willow." Angel stumbled to the bed where Willow was now sitting up and without thinking, he kissed her.  "You're awake."

"What the hell is going on in here?"  Cordelia led the charge into Angel's room, all of them armed with some sort of weapon.  "Willow, you're awake!"

"Yes.  Did I sleep in?" Willow smiled at the group, a bit confused.

"You could say that.  You've been in a coma for almost a week." Cordelia stopped talking and let Angel take over the rest of the explanation.  Willow was acting strangely.  She didn't seem at all wigged to have woken up in Angel's bed in L. A.

"The spell you did took too much out of you when I severed the link between you and your power source.  You were in a coma and everyone
thought you would die.  But now you're awake.  I knew you wouldn't leave me...us." Angel couldn't stop himself from petting her hair. Willow just smiled warmly at him.  "Xander and Buffy will be ecstatic to know you're awake and fine.  You are fine, right?  How do you feel?"

"Fine." Willow frowned.  She waited to get Angel's attention again after he was finished checking her for any injuries the demon may have caused.  "Angel, who is Buffy?"
 

~Part Eight~

"You don't know who Buffy is?" Angel's hands stilled at Willow's wrists. She was supposed to be fine. He touched her forehead. A small red mark marred her cheek.

"Have I met her? Xander didn't break up with Anya and start dating this Buffy person, did he?"

"No, no, Buffy and Xander aren't dating." Angel ran his hands up and down Willow's arms to calm her. "What's the last thing you remember?"

"I...I was in Sunnydale. I had to do a spell...everything's fuzzy." Willow rubbed her forehead. A dull thudding started behind her eyes.

"You know who I am, right?" Cordelia asked.

"Of course." Willow smiled, her headache disappearing. "You're Cordelia, he's Wesley, he's Gunn, and she's Fred." Willow pointed each of them out in turn. She snuggled closer to Angel. "And you are my Angel. What are you going to ask me next? When Angel and I got married?" Willow laughed softly. She closed her eyes for a moment, suddenly weary, so she missed the jaws dropping in the room.

"Um, uh, actually that is a standard question when conducting a neurological exam." Wesley adjusted his glasses. He had an idea about what had happened. Now he needed to know what Willow remembered to confirm it. "When did you and Angel get married?"

"A month ago." Willow laced her fingers with Angel's. She still couldn't believe that they were together, that Angel had overcome his belief that he didn't deserve happiness. She loved him so much.

Angel listened to Willow repeat the story he had given her mother about his proposal and their elopement. His fantasy was coming true. He was married to Willow and she loved him. It shone in her eyes when she looked at him. He could feel it in her touch when she reached up and caressed his cheek. She wasn't going to leave him.

"And, ahem, you do remember that Angel is...ah, that is, he is a..." Wesley stumbled. If the girl didn't remember anything of slayers, vampires, and demons, than things would get difficult.

"A vampire? Yes, Wesley, I remember. I also remember that you were a watcher like Giles was, Gunn is a demon hunter, Fred was sucked into an alternate dimension, and Cordelia is a Seer for the PTB. Oh, and I'm a witch. Is there anything else you would like to ask me?" Willow grinned at the watcher. She knew her friends were worried about her, but she didn't quite know why. Her memory was fine, she remembered Angel and their life together and that was all that mattered.

"You don't remember Buffy at all?" Cordelia took over the questioning. She stepped closer to the bed. Maybe whatever Willow had, she could catch it.

"No, but obviously I'm supposed to. Who is she?"

"Buffy is the vampire slayer," Wesley started to explain.

"What?" Willow interrupted with sudden panic. "Did something happen to Faith?"

"No," Angel answered. "Faith is fine."

"Good. I thought for a minute there that something had happened to her in prison. It would have been so sad for her to die when she's working so hard to redeem herself. Don't do that to me, Wesley."

"Sorry." Wesley sent Angel an apologetic look when the vampire glared at him. They would have to watch what they said. Willow's memory seemed to be mostly intact, which would fit in with his theory.

"Buffy is your best friend, Willow." Cordelia decided to explain. "She went to...."

"Ahhh!" Willow screamed and bent over, holding her head. Lightening pain flashed through her brain.

"Willow!" Angel held her. He didn't know what to do. He didn't know what was wrong. "What's wrong, Ionuin? How can I help?"

"Nothing. I'm fine." Willow lifted her head and gave Angel a weak smile. "Just a really bad headache. I'm sorry, Cordelia, you were telling me how I know Buffy."

"Yes, in Sunnydale...."

"Buffy has taken over for Faith," Wesley interrupted. "You only met her the once when we went to Sunnydale to pack your things for your move to Los Angeles and to do the spell. It was a healing spell for Buffy, so that's why we thought you should remember her. You should get some rest now, Miss..Willow. You've been through an ordeal."

"Wesley's right." Angel lowered Willow down onto the pillows. Her eyes were already drifting closed. "I'll be right back. I have some  business to discuss with Wes," Angel whispered. Willow nodded sleepily and let go of his hand. Angel kissed her forehead and left the room with the others. "What's going on?" Angel asked as soon as they were  downstairs.

"Since you brought Miss R..Willow here, I've been researching power linkages and what happens when they are severed. As we know, it creates a backlash that short circuits the brain of the witch. Willow has recovered, something very rare I might add, but not fully. Because Buffy was the focus of the spell and Dawn was the power source, the parts of Willow's brain that contained her memories of them has sustained the most damage." Wesley paced the lobby as his theory took shape. "Most likely, Willow was supposed to stay in a coma until her synapses were fully recovered, but something woke her up...."

"She was attacked by a demon. I threw it off her and it screamed.  The sound immobilized me and it was about to rip my throat out when Willow blasted it," Angel summarized the skirmish in his bedroom.

"Ah." Wesley nodded. It was all falling into place. "Willow awoke and her consciousness needed to fill in the holes in her memory. She recognized Gunn and Fred and knew some of their backgrounds and she  knew of your fictitious story about being her husband, so her subconscious must have picked up on things she had heard while in a  coma. Angel, that story about your elopement, you looked like you had heard it before."

"I told it to her Mom," Angel confirmed. "So, uh, everything she  heard, she thinks happened?"

"To a certain degree. It would depend if it fit in with her actual memories. Of course, she would have to make up memories of your courtship and life as a married couple." Wesley didn't notice Angel shift uncomfortably or Cordelia raise her eyebrow at the vampire. She had walked in on Angel during one of his story telling sessions with Willow and knew that if Willow remembered anything about her  relationship with Angel, it wasn't her imagination that came up with it. Wesley continued, oblivious to the exchange between the seer and the vampire. "The mind is a complex and wondrous thing. It's  capable of...."

"So, what do we do?" Gunn cut Wesley off mid-lecture. He wanted a plan of action. "Tell Red the truth?"

"No. You saw what happened when Cordelia tried. I think it would cause Willow great pain if we tried to force the memories on her and I don't think she would retain them if we did." Wesley glanced at Angel. He wasn't sure if what he was about to suggest would be good for his friend, but it was their only option. Hopefully, if Willow recovered fully and moved on, Angel could do so as well. "It's also possible that forcing her memory could cause her mind to shut down, sending her back into a coma or...it could kill her."

"No one mentions Buffy," Angel ordered unnecessarily. "And there is no way she can come here to visit. Seeing Buffy might trigger a memory Willow isn't ready for. I say we stick with what Willow believes."

"Can I be the one to call Buffy and tell her she can't come because you're shacking up with her best friend?" Cordelia grinned and bounced on her toes. She had to be the one who told Buffy. It was petty. It was jealous. It was shallow and bitchy. It was all the things she was supposed to have grown out of in her journey to being a better person, but Cordelia didn't care. Buffy had moved in and messed up her perfect highschool existence. She had lorded over the fact that she had Angel, the hottest guy in town, and no matter what she did, Cordelia couldn't have him. Not that Cordelia wanted Angel now, she just didn't want Buffy to have him. He was her friend and she knew he deserved better than the tortuous relationship he and Buffy shared.

"Only if you don't say it like that." Angel shook his head as Cordelia practically dove for the phone. "Could you also call the nurse and tell her that Willow has woken up. Don't say anything about the memory loss, we already know what caused it and we don't need nurses and doctors messing around with something they don't truly understand."

"They would be interested in the specificity of her memory loss," Wesley agreed. "They might even recommend that we try to jog her memory."

"The nurse will be here in a few minutes." Cordelia hung up the phone. "Now I get to call Buffy."

"What's to stop her from coming anyway?" Gunn asked. He didn't want to burst Angel's balloon of happiness or ruin Cordelia's fun, but it was a possibility. "From what you've said about her, it sounds like she doesn't need anyone's permission to do what she wants."

"Exaggerate. Tell her that if Willow sees or hears her or if we even talk about her, then Willow will die. Buffy is stubborn and impulsive, but she won't take a chance with a friend's life. After Cordelia is done talking to Buffy, can you give Giles a clearer explanation, Wesley?"

"Of course."

"Good. I'm going upstairs to see how Willow is doing. Could you send the nurse up when she gets here?" At their nods, Angel left them to their business and went back up to Willow. His wife.

*****

A sharp stinging sensation on her cheek woke Willow again, but this time she didn't find Angel almost getting his throat ripped out when she opened her eyes. She touched her cheek and uttered a healing spell. The stinging stopped just as the bedroom door opened and Angel entered. Worry still creased his brow and she wished she could make it go away. She knew he was worried because she couldn't remember the new slayer...Bunny?

"Hey." Angel sat down on the bed beside her and kissed her forehead. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine. You're worried." Willow brushed her thumb across his brow. "What did Wesley say about my selective amnesia?"

"He thinks it's a side effect of the spell." Angel closed his eyes and reveled in Willow's soft touch as she caressed his face. He took her other hand in his. "Does there seem to be any holes in your memory? Things that are fuzzy?"

"A few." Willow threaded her fingers through Angel's hair, scraping his scalp lightly with her nails. She shifted closer to him. "A few things aren't very clear. I know that we weren't together when I was in highschool. I was dating Oz and you were..." Willow frowned, the headache that had disappeared with sleep returning. "I know that you lost your soul for a while, but I can't remember how it happened."

"I had a moment of complete happiness." Angel didn't elaborate further. He let go of Willow's hand and slipped his arms around her waist, leaning into her. "You restored my soul."

"And I obviously took care of that happiness problem." Willow closed the rest of the gap between them and kissed him. She sucked his lower lip into her mouth and ran her tongue across it. Angel opened his mouth wider, allowing her exploring tongue more access while undertaking a little expedition of his own.

Reluctantly, Angel broke the kiss. He couldn't let this go too far. He couldn't take advantage of Willow. "Is there anything else?"

"What?" Willow was still lost in the tingling feeling their kiss had produced. "Oh, right, fuzzy memories. I can't remember how you ended up in Hell. When I try to remember, my head starts to hurt."

"Then don't think about them. When you're ready to remember, you will." Angel toyed with a strand of her hair, suddenly sad. He didn't want Willow to remember, because then she wouldn't be his wife. She wouldn't love him. "Focus on the things you do remember."

"Like you." Willow smiled. "I remember that the best thing I ever did was bring you out of Hell." She leaned in to kiss him again, but Angel pushed her back slightly.

"You did that? How?" He had always thought that the PTB had brought him out of Hell to be their warrior. He couldn't believe that this delicate girl had the wherewithal to drag him out of Hell, actually he did. Willow had always been stronger than she looked, what he didn't believe was that she had cared enough about him to do it.

"I could feel your pain. They were tormenting you. I used to fall asleep crying thinking about what they did to you." Tears sprang to Willow's eyes and Angel kissed them away as they made their way down her cheeks. He hadn't realized that their link had been active during his time in Hell. He had thought she would have been spared that. "I had to get you out of there. I used this ring of yours - I can't  remember where I got it - as a focal point in a retrieval spell. The spell was supposed to bring you to the ring. I thought it hadn't worked because you didn't appear right away. Then I felt your pain lessen and then finally you were back."

"Oh, God, Willow, I didn't know you had done that." Angel hugged her. He rained kisses over her face. "Thank you. Thank you for my soul... my life. I owe you so much."

Willow cupped Angel's face in her hands. "You don't owe me anything, Angel. You love me and I love you."

Those words shivered through Angel's system. Willow loved him. His heart swelled and he thought it might actually beat. "I love you, Ionuin." Angel captured Willow's lips, sweeping his tongue into her mouth. Willow moaned and pulled him down onto her as she lay back on the bed. Her hands moved to his chest, unbuttoning his shirt and  slipping inside to play across his cool skin. Angel purred into her ear as he buried his face into the soft curtain of her hair. He squeezed her hip and eased his fingers under the waistband of her pajama boxers.

"Angel!" Willow thrust up toward him. She had never felt anything like she felt in his arms. He loved her so completely, without reservation or condition. He never expected her to be anyone but who she was. Willow had never had anyone love her like that before. She groaned in disappointment when a knock on the door caused Angel to pull away from her.

"That's the nurse." Angel found himself panting from the effort it had taken to tear himself away from her silken skin and sweet taste. "I asked Cordelia not to say anything about your memory loss because of the spell."

"What memory loss?" Willow opened her eyes in a wide innocent stare. "Do I have memory loss?" She was rewarded with another kiss from  Angel, but it was too brief. She sighed and pouted as he left their bed and opened the door to the overly cheerful private nurse.

*****

The lobby was conspicuously empty except for Cordelia. She had chased the others out after she had decided she was the best one to talk to Angel. She was the only one who knew both Willow and Angel really well. Cordelia looked up from her magazine when she heard Angel coming down the stairs. She couldn't help noticing that his hair was rumpled and he was buttoning his shirt. There hadn't been enough time for Angel to do something irreparably stupid, so it couldn't be too late for The Talk.

"Where did everyone go?" Angel looked around the strangely empty lobby. He had just gotten used to having people in it again. "Did Wesley talk to Giles?"

"Yes, he explained everything and Giles will stress the fact that Buffy can't see Willow when he tell her. She was doing the sister bonding thing with Dawn when I called so I didn't get to tell her." Cordelia was positive that the PTB were conspiring to make her be a better person, but couldn't they have at least given her this one little bit of satisfaction? It was the least they could have done to make up for the migraines.

"Sorry. So, why did the others leave?" Angel didn't like the look in Cordelia's eye and he definitely did not like the fact that they were alone. This was their gathering place, unless they were out on a case. Gunn and Wesley were always here at this time of the day and Fred, she spent as much time in the hotel as possible because it was her safe haven from the world she was no longer used to.

"I told them to go for coffee. We need to talk about Willow and this plan to go along with what she believes." Cordelia put down her magazine and moved from behind the front desk. She gestured for Angel to join her on one of the lobby couches.

"What about it? It was Wesley's idea." Angel tried for casual ignorance. He knew what she was concerned about and if he could blush guiltily, she would know that he had already given in to a little bit of temptation.

"Willow believes you are her husband. What happens when she expects you to perform your husbandly duties? A situation that doesn't look all that unfamiliar to you." Cordelia was afraid for Angel. She had eavesdropped - once by accident, the rest on purpose - when he would tell Willow about their fantasy life together. He loved the witch and Cordelia didn't want him doing something he would regret.

"I talked to the nurse. I told her that I thought Willow looked pale and weakened. She's going to recommend that she rest and not engage in any strenuous activity. That should postpone things for a few days and after that...I don't know." He was at a loss. He knew it would be so very wrong for him to take advantage of Willow's amnesia, but he didn't think he could stop himself. Maybe he needed Cordelia to read him the riot act and remind him that Willow would hate him once she remembered the truth.

"May I make a suggestion?" At Angel's nod, Cordelia continued, "Go for it." She almost laughed aloud at his stunned expression. He had been expecting her to give him a 'no sex' lecture, as were Wesley and Gunn, but she didn't see things that way. "You deserve happiness, Angel, for however long you're allowed it. I say take it."

"Willow will hate me."

"Willow could never hate anyone, especially not you. She'll be mortified and probably blame herself," Cordelia pointed out. "Look, I'm not going to lie to you. Right now, Wesley and Gunn think that I'm telling you to suddenly have business in another city so you can avoid the whole issue, but they don't know Willow like I do. Now, she didn't love you before this happened, but she did care a lot for you, and if you make the most of this stolen time you have with her, she might love you after." Cordelia smiled encouragingly. "Don't be noble, Angel, and give up your chance to show Willow you love her." Cordelia stood up and when the nurse came down and pronounced Willow healthy, Cordelia left with her, leaving Angel to hopefully take her advice.
 

~Part Nine~

In all his torturous years as a vampire with a soul, Angel had never felt as strong an affinity to Shakespeare's tragic hero Hamlet as he did now.  To make love to Willow or not to make love to Willow, that was his question.  His little pep talk with Cordelia didn't help either.  She had planted an evil seed, telling him that he could use this time to woo Willow so she loved him no matter what.  It was like he had told Buffy, he had a second chance.  The problem was, he didn't want to base his second chance on deceit.  He wasn't Willow's husband and he had no right to act like he was.  Angel sighed, his decision made.  At least he didn't have to worry about it tonight.  Willow needed her rest.  He opened their bedroom door.

"You're still awake." Angel licked his lips and stepped cautiously into the room.  He had been hoping she would be asleep.  Then he could have
curled up beside her and lay with her until a case or one of Cordy's vision's forced him away.

"I'm not sleepy." Willow held out her hand to him.  "I was waiting for you."  Her mouth twitched as she saw the nervousness in Angel's dark brown eyes.  She knew he was afraid of hurting her, that he didn't know that loving him could never hurt her.  As Angel hesitantly took her hand and sat on the very edge of their bed, Willow felt like a Victorian gentleman seducing his virgin wife on their wedding night. She grinned wickedly.  She liked it.  "Come into my parlor said the spider to the fly."

"What?" Angel didn't catch Willow's huskily whispered words, but the sound of her voice was doing things to his body that he hadn't intended on happening.  He wished he could find out what was behind her naughty smile.

"Nothing." Willow laughed.  She ran her hand up and down his arm. "Are you busy tonight?"

If he moved, he would die.  Angel held his whole body completely stiff. "Uh, no...Cordelia hasn't had a vision or anything....they've, um, seemed to have deserted me tonight."

"Maybe they thought you needed a night off." Willow dropped her hand to Angel's thigh.  "I'm not going to give you one though."

So much for having a few days grace period.  Angel jumped up and stood at the side of the bed.  "Willow, you need your rest.  The nurse said...."

"I know what the nurse said." Willow sat up on her knees on the bed and made her way toward Angel.  "I also know that she doesn't know that I am a witch.  I heal faster than her normal patients." Willow leaned her head on Angel's chest and wrapped her arms around him.  She looked up at him, her breath hitting the bare skin at his throat as she spoke. "Besides, from what I hear, I've been resting for ages.  I don't want to rest anymore."

"Okay.  We should go out then." Angel made a last ditch effort to distract Willow.  She was making it very difficult for him to follow through on his decision.  "I'll take you to dinner and then maybe a movie if you aren't too tired."

"I'm not tired." Willow moved away a bit so she could see Angel's face. Something else was bothering him.  All of her old insecurities came back to haunt her.  "Don't you want to make love to me, Angel?"

Those big green eyes were his undoing.  "Yes, I do.  I love you." Angel bent his head and kissed her doubts away.  One hand tangled in her hair and the other rested on the small of her back.

"I love you too," Willow declared breathlessly when he had finished ravaging her mouth.  She pulled him with her onto the bed.  It had been silly of her to even think that Angel didn't want her, she knew how much he loved her.  All she had to do was remember.

The road to Hell was paved with good intentions and Angel had already been there.  Instead, he took Cordelia's advice and went straight to Heaven.  He lost himself in the taste, the touch, the sounds, and the feeling of making love to Willow.  It was incredible.  Better than his fantasies.  Better than his dreams.  The most astounding thing was that after, when he lay in bed with Willow nestled in his arms, he didn't feel guilty.  Angel was happy.

*****

That dread machine.  Giles sipped his tea and looked with affectionate melancholy at the computer.  He had actually become quite proficient on the thing, but kept up the premise of librarian fuddy-duddy because the children enjoyed teasing him and he was no where near Willow's ability.  The last week had been a struggle without Willow.  They were all distracted and worried.  It was going to get worse after he related Wesley's news.  Lord, help them all, but Glory had caused more damage then they had thought possible.  They had lost one of their own, but not to death.  It was worse knowing that Willow was alive and well, but believed that her life was elsewhere.  The loud ring of the cash register as Anya rang up the last customer of the day's purchase brought Giles' attention back to the store.  Buffy, Dawn, and Xander should be arriving soon.

"Hey, Watcher, what's up with the emergency meeting?" Spike appeared from the back room.

"I wasn't aware that I had invited you to one." Giles drained his tea and set the cup down with a clack.  He didn't like Spike and he didn't trust him, even though he had helped them protect Dawn and go up against Glory.  Spike was not a part of their group.  No vampire was.

"I did, on my lunch break." Anya finished closing the register.  She found the Scooby meetings more comfortable for her when Spike was present.  Most of the gang's loathing and disdain was focused on him then and she only caught it when she said something inappropriate.  Her face lit up when Xander walked in and she failed to give Giles her reason for inviting Spike.  Instead, she gave Xander a hello kiss.  As soon as Willow got better, she and Xander were getting married.

"Anya said you heard something about Red and my Grandsire.  I got a right to know what goes on with the Poof.  He's family."  Spike pulled out a chair and sat down.  The Watcher hated him, with good reason, but he wouldn't let that scare him away.  Angel had put up with it when he had lived in Sunnydale, so could Spike.  Spike lit up a cigarette.  He really had to stop this identifying with Peaches, it was disgusting. Next thing you knew, he'd be moving in with the bloke like on that odd couple show.

"What about Angel?" Buffy's hopeful voice broke Spike and Giles' stalemate.  "Is he bringing Willow home?"  She dropped the shopping bags from her and Dawn's trip to the mall to the floor and crossed quickly to Giles.  Angel had changed his mind.  He was coming back to her so they could help Willow together while rebuilding their relationship.

"Everyone, please, sit down." Giles waited until they had done as he asked.  "Wesley called.  Willow has woken up." His announcement was met with excited whoops and hugging all around, which quickly died when they realized that Giles didn't share their joy.  "There is a slight complication.  Willow has suffered from partial memory loss."

"What doesn't she remember?" Xander asked.  He held onto Anya's hand tightly.  It wasn't good.  Giles had that 'not good' look on his face. Of course, that could be because Willow was still with Angel.  Giles had reluctantly agreed that the best place for Willow was in Los Angeles with Angel.  Giles still had a latent mistrust when it came to Angel and Angel's newfound feelings and connection to Willow made the watcher uneasy because of Buffy.  Xander knew that Giles was primarily concerned with Buffy's feelings about Angel and Willow and that could be a reason for his grimness.

"She doesn't remember Buffy or Dawn." Before any of them could exclaim over his statement, Giles launched into the explanation Wesley had given him about the effects of the backlash from the severed link between Willow and Dawn when she was doing Buffy's resurrection spell.

"Well, we'll just have to go and jog her memory," Buffy insisted.  She understood the reason why it was her that Willow didn't remember, but it still hurt.  Willow was one of the most important people in her life and she needed her.  It wasn't fair that she had to lose Willow. Who would she talk to about her problems?  Who would she share ice cream and movie night with?  Who could she talk to about her plans to get Angel back now that his soul was permanent?

"You can't do that, Buffy.  Cordelia tried to explain who you are and Willow was immediately in great pain.  If she's forced to remember, her brain would overload and she would die.  Her memories have to come to her naturally."

"How long will it take?  Does she have to be with Angel the whole time?  Can't she just come home and I'll avoid her."

"I don't know how long it will take.  It's possible that Willow will never regain her memory of you.  And she has to stay with Angel." Giles looked at Buffy's dejected face and sighed.  The worst news was yet to come.  Buffy had been upset by Angel's pretense of being Willow's husband when the girl had been in a coma and unaware of it.  There was no telling how the slayer would react to the news that Willow thought that Angel was her husband.  "It seems that Willow's subconscious picked up on things she had heard while in a coma.  Willow woke up believing that Angel is her husband."

Spike's sharp bark of laughter broke the stunned silence that had fallen after Giles finished speaking.  He turned to Anya.  "Good thing you invited me, Pet, or else I wouldn't have known to get my new Grandmum a present at Christmas."

"Willow's Jewish, you don't have to get her a Christmas present," Anya answered.   "Maybe some 'welcome to the family' flowers would be nice."

"Shut up." Buffy's lips had turned white, they were pressed together so tightly.  What had she done to deserve this?  She had given her life for this world and what did she get back?  Not a second chance with her first true love.  No, he was too busy being married to her best friend!  "So, I'm just supposed to stay here and fight the good fight on the Hellmouth while Angel and Willow play house?"

"That's all we can do, Buffy." Giles was worried.  Despite the underlying sarcasm, Buffy had said that way too calmly.  There were no tears in her eyes.

"It's okay, Buffy." Dawn hugged her sister.  "It's not like Willow doesn't want to remember us, it's because of the spell."  She didn't say anything about Angel.  She didn't know what to say that would make it better.

"I know, Dawn.  I'm fine." Buffy took a deep breath.  She knew that Willow had never intended to hurt her.  She knew that Willow would never deliberately take Angel away from her.  This was fate torturing her again.  "Willow will remember everything soon.  She will.  I have to go for a walk now."  Buffy stood up and walked out of the magic shop before anyone could stop her.

"Buffy took the news well." Anya smiled.  She was glad that Buffy was growing as a person too and wasn't jealous of Willow just like she wasn't jealous of Willow because she was friends with Xander.

"She's going to blow." Xander exchanged concerned looks with Giles. "And it won't be pretty when she does."

*****

It was all worth it.  Meeting Darla in that dark alley and being made into a vampire.  Being cursed by gypsies.  Loving Buffy and losing his soul.  Willow restoring his soul and Buffy sending him to Hell.  Willow bringing him back.  Leaving Buffy and Willow for Los Angeles.  Wolfram and Hart bringing Darla back.  Losing Darla to his insane childe. Almost losing himself.  His soul becoming permanent and leaving Buffy for the final time.  It was all worth it because it had given him Willow.  Angel was now convinced that he and Willow would have fallen in love if he hadn't shut down the link and moved from Sunnydale. This was supposed to have happened.  It was too right.

"Daydreaming again?" Willow walked into Angel's office and shut the door.  She had been up and around for a week now.  She had called Xander, Giles and Spike and told them she was fine.  Giles had seemed weird, but that was probably because he missed her.  He hadn't wanted her to move to L. A., but since that's where her husband was, that's where she had to be.

"I prefer to call it thinking." Angel pushed his chair back from his desk to make room for Willow to climb onto his lap.

"At least I can't be accused of distracting you."  Willow placed little kisses along his jaw line and nibbled his earlobe.  She felt the beginning rumble of a contented purr in Angel's chest and she grinned. His reactions to her touch always thrilled her.

"I was thinking about you."  Angel tipped Willow's head back and brushed a kiss to her lips.  "I never dreamed life could be this perfect."  He tangled his hands in her hair.  He couldn't get enough of its soft silky feel or the taste of her lips and satin skin.  They made love as often as possible.  Willow's passionate and caring nature meshed impeccably with both his soul and demon.  Every moment he had a chance, Angel prayed to the Powers that Willow never regained her memory, that she would always be his wife.  It was selfish, but he couldn't help it.

A loud crash and a cry of pain broke up their make-out session. "Vision," Angel and Willow said at the same time.  They untangled themselves and left his office to make sure that Cordelia was okay. She was laying on the couch with Wesley and Gunn hovering over her protectively.

Pain and fear slammed into Cordelia's brain with the force of a great white shark battering its victim.  Flashes of a young teenaged girl, tears mixing with blood from a cut on her cheek, stumbling down a dark alley.  Things pursuing her, cat-like things with scales and tails like she had seen on dragons in story books as a child.  The girl's screams reverberated in Cordelia's mind and she sobbed in agony. Then it was gone, not the vision - she could still see the girl as she was attacked behind a trendy Italian restaurant not very far away - it was the pain that disappeared.  Cordelia opened her eyes to find Willow sitting beside her, her hand pressed to Cordelia's forehead.

"Is that better?" Willow removed her hand and Cordelia sat up on the couch.

"Yes.  I feel fine.  What did you do?" Cordelia rubbed a temple.  It was odd not to have a thudding headache or the residual fear crawling up her spine.  Not that she missed it.

"It's a separation spell.  It'll separate the visions from the pain and fear of the victim.  You'll probably still feel an initial pain when the vision starts, but after that the spell will take over."

"No more migraines." Cordelia hugged Willow.  She was so glad her old friend was here.  She made Angel so happy and she fit in with the rest of them so well.  She never wanted Willow to leave.  "Thank you.  Oh, Angel, four blocks down behind that Italian restaurant a fourteen year old girl is going to be attacked by these lizard-cat things. There was a lot of them."

"Let's roll then."  Gunn stood up.  He gave Cordelia a hand up.  He looked to Angel and Willow and wondered if the vampire would let his witch join them.  Gunn was curious to see what kind of fire power she had, especially after she had blasted two demons that he knew of.

"Angel.  I'm fine." Willow could see the protest in Angel's eyes.  He had been such a pain since she had woken up and the only reason why she let him get away with it was because he was so damn cute when he was overprotective.  "I want to help and not just by doing research."

"I know." Angel was torn.  He knew Willow was getting impatient with him and he knew that she could take care of herself in battle.  He didn't want Willow out there with them because he was deathly afraid that something in the heat of battle would trigger a Buffy memory and he would lose her.  He couldn't keep her locked in the hotel forever either.  "Let's go."

*****

The Hyperion was empty when she arrived.  Angel was probably out rescuing innocents with his eager band of do-gooders.  Alone, she decided to do a little snooping.  Food and blood in the refrigerator, a few dirty dishes in the sink - very homey.  In the bedroom, the bed was neatly made, but there were female touches that shouldn't have been there.  Make-up in the bathroom, dresses in the closet, underwear and silky nightgowns in the drawers.  She seethed at the thought of Angel living with another woman - sharing his life, his bed.  There was no way she satisfied him.  He was still Angel after all.  Darla smirked to herself and sat on the end of the bed to wait.  She had a few things to say to her boy and his bride.

*****

It took a while for Angel to realize that they weren't alone.  He should have sensed his Sire's presence the moment he stepped over the threshold, but Willow had distracted him.  She was babbling excitedly about saving the girl and being a part of the team again.  She was so beautiful when she was excited.  He shouldn't have kept her on the sidelines for so long, helping people was a part of her.  It was because he was focusing on Willow and her inner and outer beauty that he didn't know that Darla was there until they saw her perched on their bed.

"My, my, looks like I've created a monster.  Found out that it was safe sex as long as the slutty slayer wasn't involved and you can't get enough of it.  Bad taste to go after the best friend though, even if she has a mind like a sieve." Darla stood up and smoothed her skirt. She watched as Angel pulled the girl protectively behind him.  "I'm Darla, Angelus' Sire.  You may also know me as the killer of your friend.  What was that boy's name?  Johnny?"

"Jesse." Willow stepped from behind Angel.  The sharp pounding that accompanied so many of her memories of Sunnydale started as she thought
of Jesse's death.  Her memories that involved Darla were unclear, but she knew one thing.  Darla wanted to hurt Angel.  That wasn't going to
happen.  "You are not welcome in our home.  I want you to leave."

"Excuse me?" Darla's eyes widened and she laughed in surprise.  The chit wasn't afraid of her.  She wasn't even taking the opportunity to use Angel as a big, cuddly shield.  The red headed witch was fighting for her man and it was actually amusing.  "Oh, you and I have got to talk, little girl.  There's some crucial information that my boy has been keeping from you."

"Get out, Darla." Angel growled, his eyes flashing yellow.  He gripped Willow's shoulders.  Darla was going to tell her everything.

"There is nothing you could tell me that I would need to know." Willow slipped her arm around Angel's waist.  "I trust Angel."

The love shining from the girl's face was too much.  Darla couldn't wait to wipe it off.  "Then I guess Angel told you about our night together.  Tell me, my boy, were you already married that night, not so long ago, when we made love for hours?"  Darla reveled in the anguish that permeated the air.  She was going to make Angel pay for not loving her, not wanting her.  His little child bride would hate him and he would have to live with it.  He had thought it was complete despair that had driven him into her arms, well he would soon find out what real despair tasted like.

"Willow?" Angel crushed his wife, because that was how he thought of Willow - as his wife - to his chest so she couldn't run away.  She couldn't leave until he explained.  "Oh, God, please let me explain." He wished that Darla had told Willow about Buffy.  It was possible that she would have just blocked that information, that it wouldn't have hurt her as badly as this knowledge.  Now Willow believed that he had betrayed her.  That when he and Darla had sex, he had cheated on her.

With a heavy heart, Angel let Willow pull away.  He couldn't keep her against her will.  "Angel." Angel forced himself to look down at her tear stained face and his heart broke at the turmoil she was in.  "I'm so sorry, Angel.  I should have been here.  I shouldn't have let you push me away."

"It wasn't your fault." Angel held Willow as she sobbed in his arms. He couldn't believe her reaction.  Through the link, he didn't feel hate or recrimination, only sorrow and regret.  "I needed to hit bottom to realize that what I did made a difference and that it was my choice to do good, it wasn't forced on me by my soul or the Powers. I'm sorry that my actions hurt you.  I never wanted to hurt you.  I love you, Willow."

"I understand and I forgive you." Willow touched Angel's cheek.  "I love you too, Angel.  I always will."

The girl had forgiven him.  Darla was astonished that instead of running away in a hurt, jealous rage, the girl was embracing Angel. Darla growled, noticing too late that it only drew Angel's attention back to her.  Angel gave his bitch one last kiss and then stalked over to her.  He grabbed her arm, but this time it wasn't for fun.

"I believe Willow asked you to leave.  I'll show you the door."  Angel hauled Darla downstairs, his anger increasing with each step.  His snarls had reached fever pitch as they stopped at the front door.

"Are you going to stake me now?  For your bitch this time instead of the slayer?" Darla snarled back.

"No, I'm taking a cue from you." Angel leaned in real close and whispered seductively in Darla's ear, "Thank you, Darla.  One night with you secured my soul permanently.  I love Willow and I can be with her even though she makes me deliriously happy."

"Until she remembers that you aren't her husband." Darla found herself shoved onto her ass on the cold concrete.  Her boy was lost to her, but she could still hurt him.  "Pathetic!  You're pathetic, Angel! You will lose her!" She screamed at the closed door.

*****

It was taking too long.  A whole week had gone by and apparently Willow still hadn't remembered a thing about her.  She tried not to think about how Willow had also spent the whole week as Angel's wife.  Buffy paced her living room.  And she just bet that Angel, Cordelia, and Wesley were just clamoring to tell Willow all about the best friend she couldn't remember.  Angel was probably too wrapped up in enjoying his new life with Willow by his side.  He certainly hadn't complained about having to fawn over her when she was in the hospital.  His soul was permanent, was this sham marriage in name only?  Or were they...no, of course they weren't.  Angel would never take advantage of Willow like that and he knew that Willow would never do something that would hurt Buffy when she was in her right mind.  No, it wasn't happening.

"Hey, Buffy, I'm home," Dawn called as she entered the house.  "The movie was pretty good, you should have come with us."

"And miss out on her exercise?" Spike set down his magazine.  He had been watching the slayer pace from his dark corner all afternoon.  He had been her shadow ever since Xander had predicted a meltdown, not that she noticed.  As far as Buffy was concerned, Spike didn't exist. The only thing on her mind was Angel and what he was possibly doing with Willow.

"No one asked you to be here." Buffy couldn't tear her mind from the thought of Angel and Willow together even to reassure her sister.  Dawn needed her, but she couldn't think of her sister right now.  She had to do something.  She couldn't stay here.  She had to get her best friend
and Angel back with her, where they belonged.  "I'm going to Los Angeles." Buffy grabbed her keys and brushed past Dawn on her way to the door.

"Buffy, no!" Dawn looked to Spike for help.  "You'll hurt Willow."

"Slayer, don't be stupid." Spike jumped from his seat.  When it became clear that Buffy wasn't listening to either of them, he grabbed a blanket from the couch.  He threw it over for cover and ran out into the afternoon sun.  He hurtled himself into the car as Buffy reversed down the driveway.

Dawn ran for the phone and shakily dialed Giles' number.  She prayed that nothing would happen to Willow.  She prayed that this was something her sister wouldn't some day regret.
 

Part Ten

Caritas was having a mellow night, which was just fine with its Host, Lorne.  It was too early in the evening, just past dusk, for evil. His favorite warrior for the Powers That Be had brought in his crew for some fun, along with a big surprise - a wife.  And what a pretty and powerful little thing she was.  Lorne had liked Willow immediately. It was evident that she was responsible for his big hunk of brood  being less of a downer.  Angel actually smiled and laughed.

"This is fun." Fred grinned.  She bounced in her chair to the out of tune warbling of some college kids who had thought they had wandered into a costume karaoke bar.  The shy librarian had downed the first two drinks the reader demon had put in front of her and she was feeling floaty.  It was nice.  Fred giggled.

"You're right, this is fun, Fred, and I think you've had enough drinks with alcohol." Cordelia grinned back.  They didn't have many relaxing, uneventful nights and so far this was turning out to be one.  As soon as she had that thought, Cordelia gave the table top a light rap.  It looked like wood.

"So, who's going to sing me a song?" Lorne teased the group.  They only partook of his reading ability in cases of dire emergency and for that he was thankful.  Although he wouldn't have minded getting a glimpse at the redheaded witch's future.  Alas, she joined in on the chorus of 'no's' and groans going around the table.

"If you insist, I guess I could do my rendition of Mandy for you." Angel laughed as Cordelia and Gunn playfully shoved him back down into his seat.

"Hey, don't gang up on my man," Willow protested.  She wrapped her arms around Angel protectively.  "I don't think I've ever heard you sing, Angel.  I bet you're wonderful."

Cordelia snorted.  "If you think that after hearing him sing, then love is definitely deaf as well as blind."

"I'm afraid she's right, Ionuin.  I'm terrible." Angel kissed Willow. A sudden lull in karaoke participants prompted the bartender to flip a CD into the sound system.  A soft, romantic tune filtered through the muted conversation.  Angel stood up and offered Willow his hand.   "How about we dance instead?"

As Angel led Willow to the dance floor, Lorne joined the rest at the  table.  Gunn saw his chance to hold Cordelia and he stood up and held out a hand to her.  "That looks like a good idea, would you like to dance, Princess?"

"I would love to." Cordelia jumped up.  She and Gunn joined Willow and Angel on the dance floor.

Watching the swaying couples, Lorne shook his head.  "If I weren't witnessing this with my own ruby reds, I wouldn't believe it.  I thought Angel had passed up his chance with the witch."

"What?" Wesley paused from taking a drink with his glass halfway to his lips.  "Did you see this happening when Angel sang?"

"I saw her, but it looked like the past, not the future.  It looked like something he had given up and after getting to know the tragic one, it seemed like something he would do."

"When Angel was in Sunnydale, Willow restored his soul.  It created a connection between them and he shut it down and moved to Los Angeles
because of Buffy, the vampire slayer."  Wesley shook his head at the tragedy of the situation.  Angel had given up a love that was meant to be for one that never should have happened.  As a former watcher, Wesley had never been able to understand how a slayer and a vampire could develop feelings for each other.  It was a foreign concept, even if the vampire in question had a soul.

"It wasn't Buffy," Fred softly corrected Wesley's interpretation of past events.  She had never met Buffy and had no idea of what her and Angel's relationship had been, but she knew Angel.  She had been with him when his darkness had overtaken him in Pylea.  He had confronted the monster that lived inside of him and it had almost broken him. "Angel left because he believed he didn't deserve to be connected to Willow."  Fred briefly met Wesley and then Lorne's shocked stares before looking to her new friends out on the dance floor.  Angel was holding Willow close, a slight smile on his face.  This was the good that had come out of their experiences in that horrible place.

The music changed, but it was another slow song, so Angel pulled Willow closer.  Her head rested on his chest and her arms wrapped comfortably
around his neck.  He could hold her forever.  Angel still marveled at the fact that she was still with him after what Darla had told her. It had hurt Willow terribly that he had been with someone else, he could feel it through the link, but despite that she had forgiven him. Now he could work on wiping that hurt away.

"I love you, Ionuin. Only you," Angel whispered into her hair.

"I know." Willow looked up at him.  "I can feel it.  I know it's silly, but sometimes it's like I can feel you in my heart, my mind, my soul. It's probably just my imagination." She trailed her fingers down his cheek.

It was time to tell her.  Angel wanted Willow to know about the link so she could know him like he knew her.  He wanted her to get more than just fleeting peeks into his soul.  "It's not your imagination.  We're connected through the soul restoration.  Close your eyes."  He wasn't going to hold anything back.  He was going to communicate his love for Willow through their link.  Angel started with a kiss, he didn't want to bombard Willow with his emotions and possibly scare her.  She opened up immediately, their tongues caressed and her love for him flowed  through the link straight to his soul, filling him with a warmth that an internal body temperature couldn't emulate.  He prepared himself to offer her the same experience.  This was much harder for him, he had never given himself so totally to another person before, not as a human or a vampire.

"Willow!" The shocked and hurt gasp of his former love pulled Willow away from Angel before he could let her in.  Buffy stood by the bar with Spike right behind her.

"What are you doing here?" Cordelia sent Angel a panicked look.  So far Willow looked okay.  She had a slight frown on her face as she contemplated Buffy, but she didn't seem wracked with pain.  Cordelia couldn't believe that Buffy had taken such a chance and had showed up here.  Buffy was fixated on Willow and Angel and there would be no catching her attention to ream her out, so Cordelia pointed an accusing finger at Spike.  "How could you let her come here?"

"Hey, if you don't want people to find you, don't leave a message on your machine telling everyone where you are."  Spike glared back at the
cheerleader.  They couldn't blame him for this, he had tried to stop Buffy.  She was just too stubborn.  Too in love with Angel.

"That was for people who need our help." Gunn put his arm around Cordelia's shoulders.  Most of what he had heard about the slayer had come from Cordelia so he hadn't actually thought that Buffy was the bitch goddess incarnate, but he knew that not even Cordelia thought she would be selfish enough to risk Willow's life.  Obviously, they were wrong and this pissed Gunn off.  He had come to love and admire Willow in the short time he had known her.  He admired her courage - she had proven that she didn't back down from a fight - and he loved her because his friends did and she was a female who was actually good for Angel.

The two girls stared at each other.  Angel didn't know what to do.  He knew what he wanted to do - he wanted to get Willow the hell out of there, take her back to the hotel and make sure that the only person she was thinking of was him - but it was too late for that.  Beneath the confusion he could feel through the link, Angel felt Willow's flicker of recognition.  "Buffy?" Willow took a faltering step forward and then paused.  Again her confusion clouded their link and Angel reached for her.  Shock, sadness, and panic flared through the link and then it was gone.  All of it.  The link shut down.  He was completely cut off from Willow's emotions.  "You're alive.  The spell worked."  There was no hesitation think time as she walked to Buffy and hugged her.

"Willow." Buffy hugged her best friend back, squeezing her tightly.  She was relieved that Willow was okay.  When Buffy had first walked into the strange demon bar, she had been devastated to see Willow in Angel's arms, kissing him.  The hurt and betrayal mixed with the joy and gratitude she felt at seeing Willow alive and well.  Buffy hadn't known which emotion to focus on, but when Willow turned to look at her fear pushed its way to the forefront.  Had she done something terribly wrong?  Willow had given her her life back, would she be responsible for Willow losing hers?  Buffy wasn't used to doubting herself or her decisions and now that Willow was okay, she knew that she had been right.  Willow had just needed to see her to get her memory back and now everything would get back to normal.  They would sort through the Angel situation and she would forgive Willow for what had happened. It's not like Willow had known what she was doing, there was no reason why things couldn't go back to the way they were before.  "Are you alright, Willow?"

"I'm confused." Willow buried her face in Buffy's hair.  "Where are we and what are we going here?  How did we get here from the funeral home?"

And it was gone, just like that.  Angel's perfect world where he was loved unconditionally and could love unconditionally back disappeared when Buffy walked through the door.  Willow's confusion made it clear that she didn't remember anything beyond arriving at the funeral home to do the resurrection spell.  She didn't remember being his wife, living with him and being a part of his family, loving him.  Willow hadn't died when she saw Buffy again, but Angel might as well have.

Something was off.  Lorne frowned.  The cute red head refused to look at anyone in the room, including the blonde who had crashed their party.  One would think that if she was just reunited with her returned from the dead best friend that she would be overjoyed and unable to take her eyes off her, not subdued and uncomfortable.  You didn't have to be anagogic to know that Willow wanted out of there as fast as her cute little feet could take her.  A quick glance over at Angel told him that he was too deep in his own despondency to notice his lady love's odd behavior.  Lorne just hoped that Angel handled this better than when he had lost Darla.

*****

Time was playing tricks on Angel.  Sometimes it moved so excruciatingly slow it seemed to take years to get through one minute and other times
it moved so fast that his weeks as Willow's husband seemed like they happened a million years ago and not just two months.  He wanted that time back.  Angel sighed and tried to focus on the file on his desk.  A family had been experiencing some hauntings in the new house they had bought and had conveniently run into an exorcist who offered his services.  Angel had Spike out investigating the exorcist to see if he was a fraud.  Spike had decided to stay with him in L. A., much to the consternation of his friends, instead of going back to Sunnydale with Buffy and Willow.

"Angel." Wesley cautiously entered the office.  "Cordelia just had a vision." He backed out as Angel stood up and followed him out into the lobby.  He, Cordelia, and Gunn were still wary of Angel.  It wasn't so long ago that Angel had booted them out of his life because he had lost the girl, and he hadn't even felt for Darla half of the love that he had for Willow.  But so far, Angel had continued on.  He was subdued, but not moody as when he had left Buffy, and he was determined in his fight against evil, not blood thirsty and vengeful as when Darla was turned.  Angel was simply depressed and Wesley had no idea what they could do to help.  Having the bad influence of Spike hanging around didn't help matters any either.

"What did you see, Cordelia?" Angel leaned against the front desk. They thought he was going crack, they were waiting for it.  He wished he could reassure his friends that he wasn't going to take another trip down the dark and winding road his demon perpetually tried to lead him toward.  Angel had a goal.  He was going to continue being the warrior for the Powers That Be, but this time he didn't want the carrot of his eventual humanity as his driving force.  He wanted Willow.  If he didn't stray and did his job as he should, then one day he would be worthy of her love again.

*****

It was a beautiful day.  The sun was shining and a cool breeze ruffled Willow's hair.  Her head rested on her arms that lay on the sill of the open window.  She watched people walk by the apartment building with disinterested eyes.  All of Tara's stuff was gone, including Miss Kitty Fantastico.  Classes would start at UC Sunnydale next month and things would go back to normal.  Classes, patrol, research, practicing witchcraft, hanging out at the magic shop.  Willow would do it all. Alone.  She supposed that she could find Tara and try to renew their relationship, but that wouldn't be fair to the other witch.  Nothing was normal.  Willow loved Angel.

When Buffy had walked into Caritas, she had looked familiar to Willow and then it had all clicked into place.  All of the fuzzy memories cleared up and Willow realized one thing.  She had slept with her best friend's ex-boyfriend.  There was only one thing she could do - she pretended not to remember being Angel's wife and loving him.  It was the only way to avoid the awkwardness.  Willow didn't want to hear  Angel explain that he had made love to her to keep her mind intact.  She remembered Wesley's explanations of her memory loss and had done some research on her own.  She knew that if Angel had not kept up the pretense of being her husband, she might have ended up back in a coma or dead.  Angel would never have risked her life.  He had tried to  avoid having sex with her.  Willow's face flamed and she leaned out the window a bit more so the breeze could cool her cheeks.  She had thrown herself at Angel shamelessly.  The wind wasn't helping.  Willow felt  the heat spread through her body as she remembered making love with Angel.  So much for the 'gay now' theory.

A knock on the door barely registered in Willow's consciousness as she was lost in her memories of Angel.  "Willow!" Anya's voice accompanied her knocking.  "I know you're in there.  I saw you at the window.  You promised to help me pick out a wedding dress."

Anya was right, she had promised.  Willow pulled herself from the  window and put on her happy face.  She opened the door.  "Hey, Anya. Let me grab my purse and we can go."

"Good.  I told Buffy we would meet her and Dawn at the bridal boutique in fifteen minutes."

Willow's hand stilled as she reached for her purse.  Being around Buffy was difficult.  Knowing that she had betrayed her best friend in the most horrible way possible was eating away at her.  Telling Buffy that she remembered and talking about it would only make things worse.  Willow knew what she had to do to make it up to the slayer.  "We better get going then."

The short drive over to the bridal boutique wasn't as hair raising as usual.  Anya's driving had improved since they had chased down her  troll ex and Willow hadn't really been paying attention.  She was too preoccupied with gathering her nerve to face Buffy.

"Hi, Willow.  Hey, Anya, what colors have you picked for your wedding? Because I love this dress." Buffy held up a petal pink strapless gown.

"Yeah, she practically whacked this poor girl who tried to try it on for her sister's wedding." Dawn rolled her eyes.  She was excited about the wedding though.  She and Buffy were going to be bridesmaids, Giles was walking Anya down the aisle, and Willow was going to be Xander's best person.  Dawn smiled at Willow.  She was glad to have her back even though she seemed unhappy.  Maybe it was because Xander and Anya were getting married and Tara was gone.

"Pink.  I like pink.  It's very girly." Anya looked over as the sales lady approached them with the latest wedding dress in stock.  "Oh, I'm not a virgin.  Xander and I have had sex many times."

Letting the astonished woman off the hook, Buffy intervened and took the dress from her.  "Most brides who wear white aren't virgins these days, Anya.  Why don't you try the dress on?"  She grinned with amusement at Willow as Anya left with the saleslady and got a decidedly weak smile in return.  When Willow buried her attention in a row of multicolored satin dresses, Buffy's smile turned to a frown.  Willow had been acting oddly ever since they had returned to Sunnydale.  She was depressed melancholy and she had made no effort to find and contact Tara.  Someone who didn't know Willow as well as Buffy did would think that she was resentful because Tara hadn't stood by her as she had done when Tara had been sick.  But Buffy did know Willow.  There was some other reason why she wasn't looking for Tara.

"Willow." Dawn hopped up on a decorative end table shaped like a Grecian pillar.  She swung her legs back and forth.  "You're the best person and Buffy and I are bridesmaids, so do you wear the same color dress as us or different?"

"I don't know." Willow's eye was caught by an elaborate wedding dress on one of the mannequins in the window.  When she and Angel had gotten
married, she hadn't worn a traditional wedding dress.  It had all happened so fast.  Willow shook her head.  It hadn't happened at all. She was not married to Angel.  "It's Anya's wedding, it's her decision."

"Why don't you go ask her, Dawn, and see if she needs any help with the dress." Buffy yanked her sister off the pillar and gave her a 'leave us
alone' look.  Dawn nodded and walked toward the dressing rooms.  Buffy needed to talk to Willow.  It was frustrating the way Willow avoided being around her and when they did get together, Willow could barely meet her eyes.  It was like she was guilty of something.  Like she had borrowed Buffy's favorite pair of leather pants without asking and had ruined them.  Or...or like she had slept with her ex-boyfriend. Buffy sat down in one of the chairs.  Willow was faking her memory loss.  She remembered everything about her time in Los Angeles as Angel's wife.  But why the charade?  "Willow, we need to talk about Angel."

Yes, they did.  Willow laughed nervously and sat on the chair next to Buffy's.  She could do this.  It was for Buffy and Buffy deserved to be happy and so did Angel.  "I've been meaning to bring him up.  Do you know where the Romany Book of Lost Souls is?"

"Uh, I think Giles has it.  Why?"

"When I was looking up the resurrection spell, I also looked up Angel's curse.  It said that there was a way to make his soul permanent.  If we get the book from Giles then I can do the spell."  Willow swallowed hard and the rest barely made it out of her mouth.  "You and Angel can be together."

"What do you think?" Anya came out of the dressing room wearing the wedding dress and saved Buffy from responding to Willow's stunning declaration.  Which was good, because Buffy had no idea what to say. She hadn't expected it.

A confession.  Buffy had expected Willow to confess that she remembered everything and to plead for forgiveness, not offer to make Angel's soul
permanent.  Especially since Angel's soul was already permanent.  But Willow obviously didn't know that and the reason for her fake memory loss became suddenly clear.  Willow thought the happiness clause was still in place and that Angel hadn't been completely happy with her.  A sick, queasiness squeezed Buffy's heart.  Willow wasn't avoiding her because she had sex with Angel.  Willow loved Angel.

*****

The sun had set and as always Angel's mind was on Willow.  He wondered what she was doing.  Was she thinking about him?  Not likely, to her he was nothing more than a friend, even worse he was Buffy's ex.

"So, are you gonna brood all night tonight too or are you gonna say good-bye?  Help me pack my stuff?" Spike stepped out onto the balcony of one of the upper rooms.  Angel was leaning on the rail, looking out over the city.  It would be time to patrol soon.

"You don't have any stuff to pack." Angel turned.  He had actually enjoyed having Spike around these last few months.  Spike understood what Angel was going through because he had been there himself with both Drusilla and Buffy.  He was sorry to see his Grandchilde go, although the rest of his friends didn't share his sentiments.  Cordelia, Wesley, and Gunn couldn't wait for Spike to leave.  Perversely, Fred was kind of fond of the younger vampire.

"I was going to take some of yours." Spike grinned.  "Mind if I borrow the librarian?"

"Over my dusted body." Angel frowned sternly even though he knew Spike was kidding.  "Where are you going?  Back to Sunnydale?"  A part of him hoped that was exactly where Spike was headed.  It wouldn't be the best place for the vampire, but at least Angel would have had a tenuous
contact with Willow.  He couldn't very well call up Giles or Buffy and ask them how she was doing.  Xander might be more forthcoming, but Angel was unsure of their new comradery now that the crisis with Willow had passed.

"Hell, no.  Slayer's still in love with you, she needs time.  Maybe some day when she's ready, I'll go back and charm the stake out of her hand." Spike lit a cigarette as they made their way downstairs.

"What are you going to do?"

"Don't know, you nixed the whole thing with the librarian.  Is the cheerleader free?  I've always liked her, got that dark beauty to her."

"No." This time Angel smiled.  They walked out to where Spike's new car was parked.  "Cordelia is way too sane for you and smart."

"I dated her friend Harmony."  Too late, Spike realized that wasn't  much of an argument.

"You've got to be joking." Angel laughed.  The thought of Spike with that blonde, vapid excuse for a vampire was the first thing to amuse him in weeks.  He sobered quickly at Spike's sour expression.  "Sorry. What the hell did Dru do to you?"

"Tore my heart out.  Some old rot.  Say, whatever happened to that witch Red used to hang out with in highschool?  She was cute. Sabrina?" Spike opened his car door and leaned on it.  The broody bastard had actually laughed.  His painful relationship with Harmony the bimbo had not been useless.

"Amy.  Last I heard she was a rat, but with how strong Willow's powers are, I'm sure she must have changed her back into a human."

"Amy.  Maybe I'll give Red a call and ask where I can find her." Spike got into the car.  "Or you can call her and ask for me."

"Maybe you should take some time alone and figure out what you're going to do now that it looks like that chip in your head is a permanent fixture," Angel advised and shut the car door.

Spike snorted at the suggestion.  "And follow in your footsteps, Peaches?  I don't think so.  No slayer is making me her mopey bitch. No offense."

"Angel!" Cordelia walked out front.  "Oh, I see the fanged Billy Idol hasn't left yet.  Good-bye."

"What's wrong, Cordelia?"

"Nothing." Cordelia continued to glare at Spike.  "You have a phone call.  It's Buffy and the only reason why I'm bothering you is because she says it's about Willow this time."

Angel bolted into the hotel, forgetting to say good-bye to his Grandchilde.  "Do I get a farewell snog, darlin'?" Spike licked his lips at the brunette.  Cordelia waved her hand in a 'shove off' gesture and turned to follow Angel into the hotel.  "Hey, May Queen, stay on Angel's back about calling Red.  It's not like she doesn't remember him at all.  She won't jump into his arms or anything, but she fell for him once, maybe it'll happen again.  It's worth a try."

Cordelia turned back.  "Thanks, Spike.  I'll tell him.  Maybe I'll invite Willow down some weekend."

"You wouldn't happen to know what happened to Amy the witch, do you?"

"She's in Boston."

Before Cordelia could question his interest, Spike roared out of there. Boston was a bit nippy, maybe he could convince the witch to move back to California.

*****

The internal debate lasted for hours.  While they finished picking out dresses for the wedding, while they went out for coffee and discussed the details of the wedding, while she walked home with her sister. Buffy knew what she had to do, the debate was superfluous.  She had to tell Angel that Willow remembered everything and that she didn't know his soul was permanent.  Buffy picked up the phone.  Willow was willing to give up her happiness for her, Buffy could do the same.

"Hi, Cordelia, can I speak to Angel." Buffy heard her former nemesis sigh and start to put the phone down.  "No!  It's about Willow.  Don't hang up!"  After answering a few pointed questions from Cordelia, Buffy finally managed to convince her to put Angel on the line.  She really couldn't blame Cordelia for being annoyed and suspicious, she had been calling twice a day every day since they had left Los Angeles with  Willow to try and convince Angel that their relationship could work. All he did when he would talk to her was ask how Willow was doing.

"Hello." Angel's deep voice sent shivers down her spine and for a moment, Buffy lost her voice.  She flashed back to the moment she thrust that sword through him, but this time she wouldn't be destroying him.

Buffy told him everything.  As she spoke, her heart actually  constricted and then released.  She hadn't realized how heavy and restricted her love for Angel had been and now she was truly letting it go.  There was no second chance for Buffy the vampire slayer and Angel the vampire with a soul.  Their second chances were with other people.  Buffy hung up the phone.  The pain wasn't overwhelming.

"Hey, Dawn," Buffy yelled. "Want to go to a movie?"

*****

Angel hung up the phone and sat back in his chair.  Willow remembered being his wife and was faking her memory loss.  According to Buffy. Willow didn't know that his soul was permanent.  According to Buffy. Willow loved him.  According to Buffy.  Why would Buffy lie?

It made sense.  Angel looked at his watch.  He had enough time, as long as Willow wasn't too stubborn and took forever to convince.  Angel grabbed his jacket and left the office.  He was going to Sunnydale.  He had to tell Willow something.

*****

It was folly to be walking alone at night in Sunnydale, but Willow was confident that she could handle herself.  She wondered what Angel was doing.  Did he think about her?  Was the memory of their lovemaking an unending reel of film playing in his mind?  Did he dream about her?  Not likely, Angel dreamed of Buffy and Willow was going to do everything in her power to make his dream come true.  She wanted Angel to be happy.

A rustle in the bushes behind her alerted Willow to a possible danger. She was only a few feet from her apartment building's front door.  She didn't feel like running.  Willow turned as a vampire exited her hiding spot.  She smiled, her ridges and fangs plainly visible.

"You must be new.  For future reference, it's easier to get closer to your victim if you get vampy after." Willow tossed a stake, using her magic to guide it to its target.  The vampire crumpled in a cloud of dust.  "Not that you have a future."

The dust settled revealing a larger, broader figure.  "That's good advice."

"Angel." This wasn't a dream.  He was standing there in front of her, a smile curling his lips and lighting his eyes.  He was walking toward her.  "Hi."

"Hi." Angel smiled.  She did remember everything.  She couldn't look at him and their link was shut down completely.  Now that he had thought
about it, if Willow didn't remember being his wife, then she wouldn't remember the link.  You couldn't shut down what you didn't know about. "I have something to tell you."

"What?" Willow looked at her shoes.  She would be lost if she looked into his soft brown eyes. She would tell him everything.

"Buffy called and told me that you offered to make my soul permanent." Angel tipped Willow's chin up.  He needed to see her gorgeous green eyes.

Of course that was why he was here.  To be with Buffy.  "I have to get the book from Giles."

"No, you don't." Angel swept Willow's hair off her neck.  "My soul is permanent.  That night I had sex with Darla secured it so I could be with you and not become Angelus." He leaned his forehead against hers. "Please, Willow, open the link and let me show you."

Apparently Willow's game was over.  Buffy knew that she remembered being Angel's wife and she had told Angel.  And he had come to her to tell her his soul was permanent.  That it had been the whole time they were together.  "But Buffy...."

"Wants us to be happy.  She called me, Willow." Angel brushed a lingering kiss on Willow's lips.  It had been too long since he had tasted them.  "Please."  He closed his eyes and it was there.  A hesitant glimmer.  This time, Angel didn't hold back.  He poured his feelings into the link and didn't hide any part of himself away from her.  He let Willow feel his joy, his pain, his guilt, his loneliness, his love.  And Willow responded with the same.  Their emotions mingled and caressed as their bodies moved closer and their lips met.  "I love you, Ioniun."

"I love you too, Angel." Willow looked down when she felt Angel reach into his jacket pocket.  He brought out a white gold ring with a dark green emerald embedded in a basket weave of gold.  It looked like an eye.  Willow giggled.  "I had wondered about the lack of rings, but I didn't say anything.  I didn't want to bruise your male ego."

"I forgot about rings.  I'm glad your Dad didn't call me on it." Angel took an unneeded deep breath.  "It's a cat's eye.  It's supposed to help a witch focus her magic.  Spike picked it up.  I know you don't need it, but it reminded me of your eyes."

"Willow, I can't live another moment without you.  Will you marry me right now and then move to L. A. to be my wife?" Angel smiled as he said the words that mirrored the ones from the fantasy he had told Sheila Rosenberg.  It was all coming true and this time it would be his to keep.

"Let's go find Xander and Anya." Willow held out her hand and let Angel slip the engagement ring on her finger.  She kissed him.  Deep in her heart, Willow felt a pang because her other best friend wouldn't be at her wedding.  Buffy wouldn't be ready yet to share in her happiness. For now, Willow would have to keep a part of her world private from Buffy to spare the slayer's feelings.   One day, when Buffy found love again, they would be best friends that shared everything.  Until then, Willow had a husband to make happy.

The End.

read the sequal 'That Old Black Magic'

back