I woke up fairly early the next morning since I had promised to help out with the art show Buffy's mom was putting on tonight.
After getting ready I headed for the gallery to find Buffy, Xander, and Giles all hard at work.
"Hey everyone," I called out as I walked in. Buffy looked up and said "Hey, Will. So, how'd everything go last night? Did you catch that guy?"
"Um, well…let's just say things didn't quite go as planned. But we've set up another meeting tonight."
"Oh. Well, I guess you know to be careful," Buffy said worriedly.
"Yeah," I said, "so, what can I do to help?" I asked.
"Is that Willow?" came a voice from the back.
"Hi Mrs. Summers…er…Mrs. Giles…?" strangely, I didn't quite know how to address her anymore.
"Oh, honey," Mrs. Summers said smiling, "call me Joyce."
"OK…Joyce." It felt weird calling her by her first name.
"Buffy told me you were back in town," she continued, "how long are you planning on staying?"
"Well, I'm not exactly sure," I said, "this was sort of a last-minute trip."
"I see. Well, did Buffy tell you the good news?"
"Um, excuse me?"
"The good news," after seeing the confused expression on my face, she clarified in a whisper, "she's expecting."
"Oh, that's, right," I said, realizing what Joyce was talking about, "yeah, she did. Actually, I was one of the first ones to find out," I said proudly.
"Really? Well, that's good. Hey, Willow, if you're not really busy, I was wondering in maybe you wanted to, um, well…"
"Help out with the show?" I asked.
"Yeah. Well, if it isn't a problem."
"No problem at all," I said, "actually, it was why I stopped by."
"Oh, thank you," Joyce said, "why don't you start by unpacking those boxes over there."
Joyce pointed me in the direction of the boxes and I got to work.
***
Several hours later, the show was set. We had all finished everything we were assigned and stopped to survey the gallery. It was perfect.
"Oh, everything looks absolutely perfect!" Joyce exclaimed, "I'm expecting lots of sales today."
"That's great mom," Buffy cut in, "but can we go now?"
"Oh, honey, sure," she said, "but don't forget to be back in an hour so we can welcome the guests."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Be back at eight," Buffy said, "ready to go, Will?"
"Yeah. But actually, I have to get ready for the…meeting."
"Oh, right."
"What meeting?" Joyce asked.
"It's a work-related thing," I explained.
"Oh, you won't be coming tonight?" Joyce asked.
"No, I can't make it," I said apologetically, "but I hope everything goes OK."
"I'm sure it will. Thanks for your help, though."
"No problem."
After saying bye to everyone, I left the gallery and headed to my apartment to get ready for the second take with Dracon.
***
"Ms. Graves," Dracon said, standing as I walked through the door, "glad you could make it…alone, I see."
"Of course," I said, "I gave you my word, after all."
I had just arrived at the same warehouse as last night, hoping that we could get everything settled this time.
"So tell me," Dracon said, "what exactly does Mr. Stenbeck need?"
***
After some negotiating and a bit of arguing, we had reached an agreement. Dracon would have 'Mr. Stenbeck's' shipment of arms by tomorrow night, and in exchange, he would receive a payment of 5 million dollars.
"Pleasure doing business with you," Dracon said, extending his hand.
"Same here," I replied taking it.
"You know," Dracon continued, "if you're ever looking for a new 'contractor', look me up. No resume necessary."
"You like what you see?"
"I'm impressed, I'll admit that. I could really use people like you on my team."
"I'll think about it," I said, smiling smugly. If all goes well, Dracon'll regret the day he ever met me.
"Goodbye, Annie."
"Bye, Vic."
End Part 14
As I was getting ready to meet Dracon for the arrival of his shipment tonight, I began wondering whether or not everything would go as smoothly as planned. So far, there had been no problems, but as they say, sometimes things are too good to be true.
I hadn't run into Angelus at all the precious night, and a part of me was relieved, but, surprisingly, the majority of me was disappointed. I had come to enjoy our strange encounters.
After making the deal with Dracon, I phoned New York to let Jason and Matt know what was going down. They decided to fly in to Sunnydale with a few other men to help with the bust. After all, the Sunnydale Police Department never really could do anything right.
They came into town a few hours ago and were getting things set up for their part. Buffy and Xander had called earlier as well, hoping to hang out, but I told them that I was busy with things and we could get together later.
I had just about gotten ready when I heard a knock at the door. I opened to find Matt and Jason standing outside. They decided to check into the same hotel.
"Hey, Rosenberg," Jason said, "how are you?"
"Fine," I said a bit nervously, "just hoping everything goes down smoothly."
"It will," Matt, the eternal optimist interjected, "I mean, when has anything you were ever involved in gone south, Willow?"
"Well…" I began.
"Don't answer that," Matt said sarcastically.
I smiled at my partner, shaking my head slightly at his behavior. He never really did like to be proven wrong. But he definitely wasn't a sore loser.
"So, are you guys set?" I asked.
"Yep," Jason replied, "all of the equipment is ready, and we've stationed our men to take down Dracon's ring once you have the evidence in your hands."
"Good," I said, exhaling deeply. After locking the door to my hotel, Matt, Jason, and myself headed out.
***
"We're here," I said as we came within sight of the boat dock. Dracon must have had the shipments sent from overseas somewhere. Hopefully, when we caught him, we'd find out where his overseas base was.
"OK, Rosenberg, let's do it; you've got the money," Jason said, pointing to the small briefcase in my hands, "is the wiring OK?"
"Yeah, it's fine. Can you guys hear everything clearly?"
"Crystal clear," Matt added, "after all, this is some of the newest technology. Static-free, or so they say."
"Right," Jason said, "Matt and I will be in the van across the street. There are plainclothesmen stationed around the entire area. If anything should go wrong, we're all right here."
"Thanks, Jason," I said, "but I'll be fine."
I watched as Matt and Jason headed off to their positions and waited for Dracon to show. We had deliberately come early to get things set up, so now I had about a 15 minute wait ahead of me.
After awhile, I heard footsteps approaching and turned to see Dracon with two men accompanying him. "Hello, Annie," he said, "early, I see."
"Let's just say I could hardly wait," I replied, "so when's your ship supposed to arrive?"
"Who said anything about a ship arriving?" Dracon asked.
"Well," I said, confused, "I just figured since we were meeting at the dock…"
"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to mislead you," Dracon began in a tone that let me know that's exactly what he had intended, "but the shipment has already arrived. We'll be taking you there."
"And where exactly is 'there'?" I asked, trying hard not to let my nervousness show. This was not supposed to happen.
"You'll see. Is that the money?" Dracon asked, referring to the briefcase.
I nodded my head slightly, and Dracon motioned for me to follow him; I did, hoping that Mat and Jason had heard what was happening. He stopped in front of a sleek black Mercedes and held the door open, gesturing for me to take a seat.
I gulped slowly and moved to sit in the car, in the process checking the gun that was concealed in my waistband. Dracon got in after me and the car went into motion.
"So how long is this going to take?" I asked, pretending to be irritated.
"Does it bother you?" Dracon retorted.
"Well, I was supposed to check in with Mr. Stenbeck after everything had been taken care of, and I assured him it wouldn't be long after the meeting time. He'd be waiting."
"What, he doesn't trust his employees?"
"I think he'd just rather make sure nothing goes wrong."
"Well, he won't have to worry. It's not far. We'll be there in a few minutes."
"We're heading south?" I asked, for the specific purpose of alerting Jason and Matt to our direction.
Dracon looked at me quizzically and answered, "Yes, although I don't see how that has any importance."
"Just curious."
After what seemed like an eternity of silence, the car came to a halt in front of a deserted shack in the middle of nowhere. We got out of the car, and as I looked around, I began whispering what the area looked like and where I thought we might be, quiet enough so that Dracon and his men couldn't hear, but loud enough so that Matt and Jason could.
As Dracon lead me to the large shack, I noticed it was more like a small cabin, set in front of some sort of woods. Cold fear suddenly grabbed at me. I had no idea how far away Matt and Jason were, or if they would even be able to find this place. And in every direction I looked, I saw absolutely nothing.
No one would be able to hear anything. Not even a scream.
End Part 15
"What's going on, Dracon?" I asked as we approached the cabin. "You'll see," Dracon said as he unlocked the door to the cabin.
As I walked in, I noticed several crates in every corner of the room. Strangely, my shipment was only supposed to consist of 2 crates. "What's all this?" I asked.
"Let's call it…my storage area," Dracon replied.
"Excuse me?"
"You see, I've been transferring my merchandise to Sunnydale for quite a few months now. That way, when I set up here permanently, it'll all be ready."
"I see," I said, understanding. Dracon had no intention of double- crossing me. He was trying to recruit me! "Smart man," I continued, trying not to let my relief show. "So where, exactly, in all of this, is what I asked for?"
"Right over there," Dracon said, pointing. As if on cue, his two henchmen headed for the corner and retrieved the crates. "Would you like to inspect them?" Dracon asked, a small smile playing on his lips. He was obviously proud of himself.
I nodded my head and began to open the crates. It was all there. Every last piece, and in top condition. I smiled to myself, but then realized that I couldn't arrest them alone. Matt and Jason had yet to arrive. If they would arrive at all. If they didn't, this entire operation would have been a waste.
I decided to continue with the façade, hoping to stall enough so that Matt and Jason would be able to find the place. "Well, it's all here," I said.
"Of course," Dracon replied, "did you expect anything less from Victor Dracon?"
"I guess not. Here's your money," I said, offering him the briefcase. He took it gently and laid it down on top of one of the other crates. After opening it and running a quick count of the cash, he smiled up at me. "Pleasure doing business with you, Annie," he said, "so tell me, when exactly does your 'contract' with Mr. Stenbeck end?"
"Not for awhile, I'm afraid," I said, grinning at him, "he pays very well."
"What if I offered to up your wage?"
"I'd have to think about it," I answered, becoming agitated. I didn't exactly feel like sticking around here.
Suddenly the door to the cabin was thrown open and Matt and Jason ran threw, followed by 3 other officers, all of them armed.
"Freeze, Dracon!" Jason yelled, pointing his gun at him. Dracon slowly raised his arms, finally realizing what had happened. He cast a glance at me and smiled, "What a way to go down."
"Come here, smart ass," Matt said as he grabbed Dracon and began to handcuff him and read him his rights. The other officers had already taken the other two men to the squad cars.
Jason put his gun away and approached me. "That was close," he said, "for awhile there, I had no idea what was gonna happen."
"You're telling me. But I think we have everything we need here," I said, pointing to the dozens upon dozens of crates.
"Right. I wonder exactly what's in them?" Jason asked. "By the way," he continued, "good job."
"Thanks."
***
After we had inspected all of the crates, Matt ran over the list of things we had found. A very wide variety.
"Anything else?" he asked as he capped his pen.
"Not that I can think of," I said.
"OK," Jason started, "we're gonna head back to New York."
"Now?"
"Of course. After all, we have prisoners. Can't exactly wait until the morning."
"I guess you're right," I agreed.
"Are you coming?" Matt asked.
"Not yet. I'm thinking maybe I'll stick around for a few more days," I replied, wanting to spend a little more time with Buffy and Xander. Plus Giles had said something about a new prophecy. Call me crazy, but I felt like helping out. It would be like old times.
Jason nodded his head in understanding, "All right. We'll see you in New York when you decide to come back."
"Thanks," I replied.
***
I parked the rental car in front of the hotel and got out, checking my watch. It was about two in the morning, but I wasn't sleepy. I had just seen Matt and Jason off back to New York, and decided to take a walk around the park near the hotel.
I stopped at one of the benches and took a seat, my mind replaying the recent events. Dracon was back in jail where he belonged. I found myself thinking of Jack, and of the moments we had shared, but strangely, that sharp pain that I usually felt whenever I thought about him didn't accompany these memories.
For the first time since Jack's death, I felt at peace. There was no guilt, no sadness. Only this strange…contentness. Things were right again.
I heard a step behind me and turned to see Angelus standing there. "Following me?" I asked, standing.
"And what if I was? Does it still scare you?" he countered, referring to our meetings in New York.
"Not tonight, Angelus," I said, moving away from him.
"Really?" he asked, stopping me. "And what makes tonight so different."
I turned to face him and responded, "Because I'm on cloud nine, Angelus. And not even you can bring me down."
And to prove my point, I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him hard on the lips.
End Part 16
As I stood there kissing Angelus, I could feel his initial shock being gradually replaced by enjoyment. His arms came up to grasp my waist and I relished in the feelings that came with them.
I finally managed to break the kiss off, gasping for breath. "Well," Angelus broke the silence, "I never saw that one coming. Maybe I should interrupt your good moods more often," he continued, pulling me closer to him.
I smiled up at him and replied, "Maybe you should."
"So why are you in such a good mood anyway?" Angelus' curiosity got the best of him.
"We arrested Dracon," I answered.
Angelus exaggerated a sigh and said, "And here I thought it was me."
"You're not that good," I joked.
"But I can be," Angelus said, his voice dropping to a sultry whisper, sending shivers through my spine. He brought his lips above my ear and whispered, "Would you like me to show you how good I can be, Willow?"
I couldn't formulate an answer. In that instant, all of my joy from the successful job had been replaced by fear, which was again replaced by doubt and a million other feelings. What prevailed, however, was a longing, a hunger.
As much as I feared and hated Angelus for everything he had done, I wanted him. In the beginning, I had tried to convince myself that it was just a sexual attraction. He was, after all, very sexy. But then I started to feel something else. Something that just sort of snuck up on me and hit me over the head.
Sometime during our various random, pointless conversations, I had begun to feel something for him. I'm not sure why, it just sort of happened. There wasn't any reason for it to happen, but it did. I was drawn to him.
"Willow?" he asked, drawing away from me ever so slightly, "you still there?"
I exhaled slightly, purposely, to let him know I had heard everything he said to me. But I was so confused.
My mind drifted back to the memories of my past relationships, especially to the two men I had fallen hopelessly in love with. We had deliberately taken things slowly, because I had thought that was the best thing. And where did I end up? Both of them dead. There were so many opportunities…
I decided I wasn't going to let this one get away. A part of me told myself that Angelus wasn't going to die, that I didn't love him, that this was just a cop-out. Another part of me remembered Buffy's words from the first night at the Bronze: Seize the moment.
So I did. Consequences be damned.
I lifted my face to Angelus' and met him in a searing kiss, slow and passionate, pulling him closer to me.
When the kiss broke, Angelus placed his hands on my cheeks and looked me straight in the eyes. "Come with me," he said, but it was more like a question. He was asking.
I nodded my head and grasped his hand as he lead me back to the mansion, which had been long since abandoned. He led me into one of the bedrooms and I willingly followed, closing the door behind me.
I wasn't sure why I closed the door, since there was no one else even remotely around. Perhaps it was my sub-conscious, letting me know that, after this, there was no turning back.
Angelus turned to face me and kissed me again, tracing a line along my jaw and down my throat, simultaneously removing me from the suddenly confining clothes.
He led me towards the bed, never breaking contact, and gently laid me
down. I pulled him down on top of me and let my hands explore his magnificent
body…
When it was over, Angelus gathered me into his arms and held me tightly against his now familiar form. I indulged in the feel of his arms around me and allowed my mind to replay the recent events.
It had been wonderful and unlike anything I could have ever imagined. He had been so gentle and loving. I never knew Angelus had a gentle side. As unsure as I was of my feelings, I knew one thing for certain: Angelus and I didn't just have sex; we made love.
'Willow?" he asked, nudging me slightly.
"Hmm?' I asked, looking up at him.
"How do you feel?" he asked.
"What do you mean?"
"Any regrets?"
I wasn't sure, but I could have sworn I heard fear in his voice. Was he afraid I had regretted what we just did? Was it possible he felt something for me as well? It couldn't be impossible, after all, Spike had genuinely loved Drusilla, and he was as much a soulless vampire as Angelus.
"No," I said, locking my gaze onto his, "I have no regrets."
Angelus smiled slightly and lowered his head to kiss me softly on the forehead. It was a lover's gesture.
"Sleep, Leannan," he said, "just sleep."
And so I did.
End Part 17
I was sitting in the library flipping through some books searching for anything about the "big event" that was supposed to happen in a few days.
Everyone else was there, too: Buffy, Xander, Giles, and surprisingly, even Faith. I remembered Buffy telling me that she hated research and hardly ever helped out with it, but she was here today. According to Giles, whatever was coming up was big.
I sighed as I turned the last page of the book in front of me, not having gotten any information. I closed the book and tossed it aside, simultaneously reaching for another one.
As I opened the book, my mind drifted to last night, with Angelus. I think my conscience was finally starting to kick in, but it didn't change my feelings. I knew I had to tell the others about what happened. It would be unfair not to. But a part of me wanted to keep this hidden. I didn't know how they would react, especially after all this time. My guess is they wouldn't take it very well.
I shook my head to clear my thoughts and focused on the work ahead: research. I had plenty of time to figure out how to deal with my new predicament later.
Just as I finished skimming over the first page, Giles called out, "I've found it!" Everyone looked up from what they were doing and faced Giles expectantly.
"What is it?" Buffy asked.
"Well," Giles began, "the passage states: 'during the witching hour of the eve of the Grande Alignment, Fiorolc will once again awaken for he who is most worthy.'"
"And this is supposed to mean what?" Faith asked, as confused as everyone else.
"I'm not quite sure," Giles stated, "but I remember reading about Fiorolc a long time ago. He is not really person, but more an element. Pure Evil."
"Oh, gee, I'm loving this so far," Buffy said sarcastically.
"Well, his existence has never been confirmed," Giles clarified, "he's more a part of myth."
"What is he supposed to do?" I asked, intrigued and worried at the same time.
"Well, he himself does nothing," Giles began, "he sort of…how would you say it…ensures that Evil remains on Earth."
"Like the Devil?" I asked.
"More powerful. Legend has it that the Devil received his powers from Fiorolc. He, and not the Devil, is the ultimate adversary of Good."
Xander let out a low whistle and remarked, "And we thought we had problems before."
"What's exactly supposed to happen?" Buffy asked, "I mean, if he doesn't involve himself personally, he's not really a threat, right? And even if he is, how are we supposed to fight something that's not a person?"
"I don't know," Giles replied, "there are no records of anything pertaining to him, and I only have a limited knowledge."
"So basically we're at a dead end?" Xander asked.
I looked around the room and noticed the grim faces of everyone. It was a strange feeling not knowing what we were up against. In the past, we usually figured something or other out if a day, tops. This seemed hopeless.
Suddenly I remembered Giles had mentioned something about a "Grand Alignment." What did that mean?
"Giles?" I asked, breaking the eerie silence that had descended on the library, "what was that about the 'Grand Alignment'?"
"Um," Giles looked back down at the book still in his hands and re-read the passage, "I'm not sure. It could be any number of things: an eclipse, a magnetic alignment of the poles, and interplanetary alignment-"
"That's it!" I exclaimed. Everyone turned to look at me with confusion written plainly on their faces. "Will?" Xander asked, "what are you talking about?"
"The interplanetary alignment," I clarified, "I remember hearing something about it on the news a few nights ago. Supposedly, every single one the nine planets are gonna reach a place in their orbits where they form a perfectly straight line. They're supposed to align at exactly midnight, which is sort of strange, and hold it for about an hour."
"The witching hour…" Giles said.
"Right," I nodded my head, "the reporter said that scientists had calculated that the last time this happened would have been over 5,000 years ago."
"You know," Xander said, "I remember hearing about that, too. I didn't really pay much attention to it at the time, but the guy on the news was saying something about being worried about cult activities during that time, since they're obviously gonna hear about it and might try something like that mass suicide when we were in school."
"Willow," Giles said, turning to me, "do you remember when they said the alignment would take place?"
"I think it's gonna be tomorrow night, but I can't be sure."
"Giles," Buffy said, "do you think these cult people are planning something? Would they know anything about this Fiorolc guy?"
"It's possible," Giles said, "cults or even vampires and other demons may try something. And if they do attempt to perform some sort of ritual, it could unleash unimaginable chaos on the world."
"Well, time to start hitting the underground," Faith said, happy that she finally had some physical activity to do.
"I'm coming, too," Buffy said, "besides, the sun set about an hour ago, so we need to be careful."
I watched on in envy as Buffy, unaware of her actions, placed a hand over her womb, as if to protect her unborn child. In eight months, she and Xander would have a small child of their own to teach and love, something I had wanted desperately for myself-something I still want.
"True," came a new voice from the doorway, "you can never be too careful these days."
All eyes flew to the door at the sound of the familiar voice. I gasped as I saw Angelus standing there, leaning nonchalantly against the frame, arms crossed over his chest, a huge grin plastered on his face.
My stomach tightened in anticipation of the inevitable, and I stood there praying to God that he wasn't really there, that he hadn't chosen now of all times to reveal himself.
"I'm back."
End Part 18
"I'm back," Angelus said the words with such smugness, and I knew that all hell was about to break loose.
"Angelus," Buffy stated, her voice a low whisper. I looked over at my best friend and I could literally see the pain and fury in her eyes. She obviously had not forgotten; how could she?
"What are you doing here?" Giles stepped in. He always did recover from shock the fastest.
"Well, I've been here a while," Angelus answered, "what, you mean Willow didn't tell you guys?" He directed his gaze at me and I felt like I was about to collapse. It wasn't supposed to happen this way! What was he doing?
"Willow?" Buffy looked at me with questioning eyes. I could tell she didn't want to believe it. When I saw the pain in her eyes, I desperately wanted to tell her he was lying, and I almost did. But I couldn't.
I nodded my head slowly as I stood frozen in place, feeling once again like the insecure teenager I had been.
"How long have you been here?" Buffy asked, facing the demon who had caused her so much pain.
"Oh, about a week, I guess," he replied, "plus a few days."
"And you knew he was here the whole time?" Xander yelled in disbelief. I felt tears well up in my eyes, but I fought them down. Things were going to get a lot worse, and I had to be strong. I had to tell them the whole truth.
"I met him in New York," I told them, "he followed me back here."
"Willow, why didn't you warn us?" Giles asked. Suddenly his gaze darkened, and he asked, "did he threaten you?"
Again, I shook my head. Suddenly Angelus walked up behind me and placed his arms around my waist. "I didn't have to threaten," he said suggestively, "she was more than willing."
At that point I wanted to stake him. How could he be doing this to me?! But I loved him. Now I know what Buffy felt like all those years ago.
"You screwed the demon?" Faith blurted out from behind everyone. Up to now, she had kept quiet. I wish she had kept on keeping quiet.
I pulled myself away from Angelus and tried to explain. But I found I couldn't as I looked in the eyes of my friends.
"Shut up, Faith," Buffy said, looking at me the whole time, "Willow wouldn't do that. You don't know her." She was in denial.
I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing would come out. I shut it again for a moment, then tried again. This time the words came out, "She's right. Angelus and I…" I let the sentence hang.
"How could you?" Xander yelled again, "after everything he's done to us? What's gotten into you?"
"I don't know," I replied, "love, maybe."
"Love?" Xander asked incredulously, "how could you love a demon? At least Angel had a soul when he and Buffy and were involved."
I felt like I was going to explode, so I did the first thing that I thought of. I slapped Xander. And instantly regretted it. "Xander," I said, "I'm so sorry…"
"Don't," he said, "now I know where your loyalty is." He turned around and went to the back of the library, where Faith stood. "You're obviously not going to listen to me," he continued, "maybe Giles and Buffy can knock some sense into you."
I looked once again at Buffy and Giles and felt my heart constrict. What had I done? "Say something," I asked them, "please."
"What do you want us to say?" Giles said, the pain still evident in his voice, "you know full well what he's done."
"He's changed," I argued lamely.
"He killed Ms. Calendar and Kendra," Buffy finally spoke.
"I know," I said, not being able to think of anything else to say.
"And you still…you…you're supposed to be my best friend!"
I suddenly noticed that Angelus hadn't spoken a word throughout this whole scene. He had moved back to stand against the doors. But it was better that way.
"I am your best friend," I said.
"My best friend--the old Willow--would never have done anything like this."
"I AM the old Willow. I've just grown up. And fallen in love."
"Love?" she asked, much like Xander had just minutes before, "he doesn't know the meaning of the word. He's tricked you, Will. He's using you."
"I do love her," Angelus spoke from the doors where he stood. The words shocked everyone into silence, including myself. He'd never said it before. I turned to face him and he said it again, "I love you, Willow."
I stared at him for what seemed like an eternity, and Buffy spoke again, "He's lying, Will."
"Whether you want to believe it or not, Buffy," Angelus defended himself, "I'm not the demon I was five years ago."
Buffy looked at him in disbelief, "Of course you are!" she yelled, "demons don't change; YOU haven't changed.'
"He has," I said.
With lightening speed, Buffy pulled a stake from her sleeve and threw it with all her might at Angelus. I watched in shock as the stake flew through the air, headed straight for Angelus' heart. Fortunately, Angelus was just a tad bit faster. He maneuvered himself out of the way and the stake landed with a solid thud in the doorway.
"I'll kill him," Buffy said, all of her pent up anger and hatred from the past years emerging. She prepared to lunge herself at him when I called out, "Buffy, no! Your baby!"
The realization of my words must have hit her hard because she instantly froze. I knew she would never intentionally harm her unborn child.
"Come on, Willow," Angelus said, "we should give them a chance to digest the news."
I looked at the faces of the people I loved most in the world and knew I had hurt them all deeply. And that knowledge was killing me. But I knew that Angelus was right. I had finally found someone I loved, who loved me back, and I wasn't ready to give that up. I nodded in consent.
"Willow, no," Buffy said, "don't go with him. He'll kill you!"
"I'm sorry, Buffy," I told her, "I'm sorry." I had directed that one to everyone in the room. "We can talk about this later, when we're all calmer."
As I prepared to leave the library, Buffy called out, "Just answer one question."
I turned back to her and asked, "What?"
"Do you regret it?"
I knew what she meant. "No," I told her honestly.
And with a soul full of pain, I left the library, Angelus close behind.
End Part 19
"Willow?" Angelus began prodding, "are you all right?"
We had arrived at the mansion, after a long walk in silence. I guess I was still in shock after everything that had happened. Finally I unleashed my pent up anger, "How could you?!" I whirled on Angelus. "You knew how everyone would react! How could you just barge in there and blurt everything out?"
Angelus sighed and grabbed me by the shoulders, turning me to face him, probably to calm me down. "Listen to me," he said sternly, "it had to come out, sooner or later. And I'd rather not have to resort to sneaking around to see you until you finally got up enough courage to tell your friends, or one of them figured it out on their own. Did you think about what would have happened if we kept this a secret and then were found out?"
I nodded my head slightly, as I finally understood where he was coming from. But that didn't excuse him. "If you wanted to tell them, you could have warned me first. I could have had time to prepare them for what we were gonna tell them, or at least I wouldn't have been caught off guard, and then maybe I could have explained things a bit better."
Angelus looked at me for a long moment then said, "You're right. I know they're your friends and I know this must be hurting you a lot. But do you honestly think that they would have reacted any differently, even if you had prepared them?"
I thought about his question for a long moment, and realized he was right. The preparation wouldn't have made much of a difference. It was the news itself that devastated them, not the timing.
"No, it wouldn't have made a difference," I stated.
"I'm sorry, Willow, if you're upset. Truth is, I'm not used to 'consulting' with anyone about my actions. I do what I want to do, when I want to do it. That's the way it's always been."
The sincere tone in Angelus' voice reminded me of his words at the library. He had told me he loved me, in front of everyone.
"Angelus?" I asked him, "what you said at the library, about loving me…was that true?"
"Would I lie about something like that?" he answered me, looking me straight in the eyes, "I'm not quite sure when it happened, or how for that matter, but it happened. There's something about you, Willow, that I can't ever get enough of. You're intelligent and beautiful, and you excite me, more than anyone ever has."
I wasn't sure how to respond to that, but I knew I felt the same way. I just couldn't force myself to say it. I knew that as long as the words remained unspoken, I could deny it. It wouldn't have to be true. But a part of me wanted it to be true. I knew that it would hurt my friends deeply-correction-already did hurt my friends, but a person could only lie to themselves for so long.
I don't know, but maybe I was afraid to admit anything because I was afraid of being hurt again. If I didn't love him, then it wasn't supposed to hurt as much if anything ever happened…like it did to Oz and Jack.
"I love you, too," I told him. I wasn't going to live in fear for the rest of my life. Let the chips fall where they may.
I wasn't sure, but I could have sworn I saw a flash of guilt in his eyes as I said those words. But I didn't have time to think about it, because the next thing I knew, his arms were wrapped around me, crushing me in an embrace.
"Oxygen," I managed to gasp out, unsure what to make out of his actions. He released me as he realized I couldn't breath, and after a moment, asked, "Better?"
"Yeah," I told him.
"Good." He again gathered me in his arms and placed a kiss on my lips, soft and tender at first, then more urgent and demanding. As he forced my lips open, his tongue slid inside and began its exploration.
But as I melted into his arms, a strange feeling washed over me.
Fear.
I'm not sure why, but the kiss reminded me of a good-bye kiss. Like the one Jack had given me right before he went undercover, like he knew he wasn't coming back.
I pulled away frantically and asked, "Angelus, what's wrong?"
He didn't answer right away, but instead looked as if he was having some sort of internal conflict. Like he wanted to tell me something, but couldn't.
"What is it?" I demanded again, feeling helpless.
His face hardened and he straightened up a little bit more. His voice was hard and cold as steel as he answered, "Nothing. In fact, everything is on schedule. Just like I planned."
Before I could even register what was happening, I felt a fist collide with the side of my head, confusion swimming about as the world went dark.
End Part 20
I awoke from the depths of unconsciousness feeling groggy and light-headed, dazed. I shook my head slightly to remove the haze from my vision, remembering slightly the events right before I was knocked out.
I tried to stretch my limbs but soon found that my arms were chained firmly to the wall behind me. As I realized the full impact of my predicament, I began to struggle violently, hoping against hope that I would somehow be able to break the chains. Of course, it didn't work.
Angelus.
He did this. And I let him! How could I have been so stupid? Buffy and Xander and Giles were all right. He was just using me. But it felt so real…I thought he really loved me.
What a joke. A demon that can love? And I call myself a cop? But I loved him. I must have been insane. At the thought of everything I had said to him, done for him, done *with* him, I felt mortified. I wanted to die.
"Awake I see," Angelus said, sauntering into the room.
At the sight of him, I felt all of my rage and hatred emerge to the surface. But I wasn't going to let him get the better of me, not anymore.
"Yeah, I'm awake," I informed him. I could see by the expression of amusement on his face, he got both meanings of the statement.
"Good," he answered, "took you awhile. You've been out for practically an entire day."
"I'm surprised I'm still alive."
"You amaze me, Willow," Angelus said, moving closer. He stooped down in front of me and continued, "how you can just change your emotions so quickly. Hide them from everyone. Put on a fake mask. As I recall, you weren't very good at that before."
"Let's just say I got lots of practice," I practically snarled at him. "What the hell do you want anyway?"
He reached out to caress my cheek and replied, "You," he stated, "it's always been you…just not in the way you first interpreted it. Although I have to admit, that was fun."
I tired to pull my face away from his grasp, but the wall behind my head kept it from going anywhere. "Son of a bitch," were the only words I could express at that point without letting my rage get the better of me.
Angelus just grinned and said, "Flattery will get you nowhere, dear."
I fumed silently. But I also needed answers. What was he planning? "What are you going to do with me?" I asked him.
"You?" he asked, "well, not much…just a small sacrifice."
My heart skipped a beat at those words. Sacrifice? Like to some horrid demon? And since when did Angelus make sacrifices?
"Since when do you make sacrifices?" I let my thoughts slip out.
"I don't usually," Angelus smirked while standing up, "but tonight's special. The Grand Alignment and all."
I gasped as the realization hit me. "Fiorolc," I breathed.
Angelus turned back to look at me and inquired, "You've heard? Well, I should have guessed. That's what all of you were gathered talking about at the library last night. Oh well. Your precious friends will never figure it out in time to help you."
"Why do you need to make a sacrifice to this demon?" I asked, trying to get as many answers as I could.
Angelus grinned and shook his head, "So misinformed. He's not a demon, Willow. He's Evil. And with the right…offerings…I'll become all-powerful. No one will be able to stop me."
I felt nauseous at the thought. "Why me?" I asked, "why choose me out of everyone else?"
I watched as Angelus went to retrieve a book from the table across the room. He flipped it open to a marked page and read: "And he who offers the ultimate sacrifice unto the Creator shall on himself receive the gift of true power."
He stopped and looked down at me. "Would you like to hear the rest, Willow?" When I didn't answer, he continued his reading: "The offering of an Innocent is regarded as the highest show of worthiness. One with a mane of fire and an emerald gaze…"
I shut my eyes as he went on describing the power given to a vampire that makes the sacrifice. This couldn't be happening. I had unwittingly allowed myself to be sucked into Angelus' scheme, and now…he'd kill everyone. No one would ever be able to stop him.
I guess Angelus finally figured I wasn't paying attention anymore, so he shut the book and returned it to the table.
"Oh, Willow," he said, "don't look so glum. It's not like it's going to hurt…much."
I fought down a feeling of hopelessness that was quickly beginning to surface. It wasn't over. I couldn't let it be over. Not like this.
"Time's up," Angelus stated, "it's almost midnight."
He unlocked the chains around my wrists, and I saw that as my opportunity to escape. As soon as the chains were off, I kicked out with my foot, landing a solid blow to Angelus' gut.
Unfortunately, it didn't phase him.
I scrambled out from his reach as he lunged at me, barely making it out of the way. I quickly got to my feet and ran for the door. But Angelus was quicker. He grabbed me around the waist and pulled me back.
I brought my elbow back and jabbed him in the chest. I knew that my efforts were futile, but I had to try. I wasn't going down without a fight. And if he killed me during that fight, then at least he couldn't sacrifice me for power.
Angelus' grip loosened at the slight pain in his chest and I freed myself from his arms. My eyes quickly scanned the room for a weapon of some sort, and finally laid rest on a rather large statue. Small enough for me to pick up, but still large enough to hurt even a vampire.
I ran for it and snatched it up, intending to turn around and smack Angelus over the head with it, but once again, I was too slow. Angelus was on top of me in less that a second, dragging me to the center of the room where an altar stood. I wonder how I missed that before?
He slammed me against it, and as my nerves tried to recover from the shock, he tied my arms to the sides. When I finally regained control of my shaking body, I struggled for all it was worth. It obviously wasn't worth much. I was securely strapped in.
My heart began beating wildly in my chest as Angelus stepped closer, a sickle knife in his hand, gleaming in the moonlight. He began chanting some strange words in a strange language. I began to gasp for breath. Things couldn't end, not like this.
I watched as he lowered the knife to his wrist and cut a small slit, squeezing a few small drops of blood into a bowl on the table next to the altar. He laid the knife down then turned to me, game face on.
My body went numb from all of the different raging emotions, and all I could do was watch with wide-eyed horror as his fangs began their descent.
End Part 21
I shut my eyes as I saw his fangs near my throat, perhaps to block out the sight of my impending death. I never thought it would end this way: no friends, no family, no chance to say good- bye. I held still, waiting for the inevitable sting of Angelus' fangs.
It never came.
Puzzled, I opened one eye slowly, then the other one. To my surprise, Angelus was over 10 feet away, pacing back and forth like a caged--and extremely agitated--animal.
I wasn't sure exactly what was going on, but I wasn't dead, and that was definitely a good thing. I tried to think of something to say, but nothing came to mind. So I said the first thing that popped into my head.
"What's wrong?" I asked. What's wrong? How could I have just asked that? Do you *want* him to kill you?
Angelus stopped pacing and turned to face me, a strange look in his eyes. The next thing I knew, he was just inches from my face, game face on, and snarling.
"What is it about you?" he growled, more to himself than to me. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to respond to that, so I kept quiet. After all, look where my last attempt at conversation got me.
As quickly as he had leapt at me, he moved away and began his pacing again, muttering to himself under the breath he didn't have. Finally he stopped and looked up at me with a determined look in his eye. He approached slower this time, taking his time, all the while keeping his eyes focused on mine.
I held my breath, not sure what was going to happen. He stepped right in front of me and gripped the back of my head tightly. His game face still on, I felt his fangs sink into my neck and I thought it was over.
As my blood gushed into his mouth, I could literally feel my life- force slipping away. Strangely, it didn't hurt. In fact, it was almost…peaceful. Like falling into a deep sleep…only one you'll never wake up from.
Suddenly it stopped and I felt Angelus pull away. The sensations form the past few moments began to fade away slowly, like a dream I had just woken up form. I begin hoping the whole thing was a dream. That I would wake up in my bed in New York and discover that this entire week or so had been a dream.
As the world came into focus again, I realized with disappointment that it was all very real. I turned my head slightly and saw Angelus standing by the table with the knife in his hand.
My body went into a state of panic again. Maybe the ritual wasn't quite over. Angelus approached me yet again, but this time with a look on his face I couldn't quite place. He held the knife to my wrist, but instead of slicing through skin, he sliced through the ropes, first one side, then the other.
I wasn't sure what to think as I felt the bonds falling to the ground. I stepped away from the altar as Angelus stepped back. My gaze was focused on his as I massaged my wrists to return the circulation.
Neither of us said a word. I didn't know what was going on, but the rational part of me took over and decided it wasn't going to stick around to find out.
I took one last look at the man--vampire--whatever--I thought I had loved--maybe still did love--and ran. I turned away from Angelus and ran out of the mansion, not once looking back, not caring if he followed.
I ran all the way back to my hotel room and slammed the door, throwing myself down onto the bed, letting my exhausted body finally relax. I don't think I could even count all the different emotions I had experienced tonight, or was experiencing right now.
And for the first time in years, I cried.
I don't know who or what I was crying for, or why. I didn't care. I guess it was just a way for me to release all of the emotions. After what seemed like hours, I dragged myself off of the bed and decided it was time to go home. To New York. There was nothing here for me. I was stupid for coming back. This felt just like the weeks after Oz died.
But I had a new life in New York now. One that I loved. So I picked up the phone and bought a ticket back to New York on a flight that left in two hours.
I began packing the few things I had brought with me when my eyes laid rest on a picture of the gang from a long time ago. Everyone was there, including Cordy and Oz.
My thoughts flew to Buffy and Xander and Giles. I owed it to them to call them and tell them I was leaving. I owed it to them to tell then what happened. But I couldn't. I couldn't take their "I told you sos," not now.
I once again lifted the phone from the cradle and dialed the number at the library. I figured they'd all probably be there.
"Hello?" came Giles' voice, obviously curious as to who would be calling the school library this late at night.
"Giles?" I said.
"Willow!" came his relieved reply, "where have you been? We've all been so worried about you."
"I know, and I'm sorry. I…needed some time to think. And you're right. That whole thing with Angelus…well, I got a call from New York, and I have to get back…so…"
"Willow? Did something happen?"
"No--"
"Willow?" came Buffy's voice, "are you all right?"
"I'm fine," I told her, trying to calm her down, "but I have to get back to New York. Some stuff's happening there…" I felt sick at the ease with which I lied to Buffy, my best friend. There was a time when I couldn't lie to her to save my life.
"Are you sure?" she asked.
"Yeah. Look, I'm sorry for what happened earlier…you guys were right. I should have been more careful. But nothing's happened. And tell Xander that I'm OK, and that I'll write you guys when I get there."
"Oh, OK," Buffy replied, the concern evident in her voice, "but you know you can always talk to me, right?"
"Yeah, I know. You let me know every detail about the new arrival, you got it?" I asked her, trying to lighten the mood.
It worked.
"No prob, Will. And you keep me informed about everything that goes down in New York, K?"
"Yeah. Oh, by the way, that whole thing with Fiorolc…don't worry about it. It's over."
"We figured, seeing as how the Grand Alignment has passed and no strange stuff has happened."
"That's what I figured, too. I just wasn't sure if you guys remembered it was tonight."
"Are you kidding? With Giles here?"
"How could I forget?"
"When's your flight?" Buffy asked.
"In about an hour," I answered.
"You take care of yourself, you hear? And I expect to see you back here in eight months."
"I wouldn't miss it for the world," I told her truthfully.
After a few more exchanges, we said our good-byes and hung up. I picked up my suitcase and headed out the door.
End Part 22
The scene was beautiful. Everyone I knew was there, watching. It was night-time and the waves of the ocean were lapping gently at the edge of the cool sand. The moon was out bright, shinning, smiling.
I was standing underneath a white arch, covered in vines of the most beautiful flowers. The arch matched the seats of the guests: white, delicate-looking, and covered in flowers.
I looked down for what seemed like the hundredth time at the shimmering white gown I was wearing that night. It was sill as breathtaking as the first time I had seen it, and I knew he thought so, too.
A breeze began blowing slightly and I looked up as the priest spoke his next words, "Willow Ann Rosenberg; do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, 'till death do you part?"
I looked up at the face of the man next to me and smiled into his dark eyes. I couldn't help thinking that at that moment, in the pale moonlight, he had the most angelic face.
I couldn't keep the grin from covering my face as I spoke to Angelus, "I do."
***
I awoke from the dream with a start, gasping for breath. It had been three months, and I was still dreaming of him. Three months since I left Sunnydale and returned to New York. Three months of heartache.
Three months and I was still as confused as ever. Had he planned everything from the beginning? Why did he let me go? Did he ever truly love me?
I shook my head for what seemed like the millionth time. Angelus never seemed to be far from my thoughts. And for all that he had hurt me, God help me, I still loved him. But I hated him, too, with a renewed passion.
I came back to New York and practically threw myself into my work, never stopping to take a break. Jason had figured something was up from the start, and finally decided to corner me about it a week ago. I told him I was just catching up on time lost, but he didn't believe me. He ordered me to take a week off to "relax and deal with whatever was bugging me," as he put it.
So I did. But I still hadn't dealt with it. I don't think I ever would. There was no closure. I sighed as I got out of bed and headed for the bathroom. I wouldn't be able to get back to work for another couple days, and I was absolutely out of my mind with boredom. I still kept my night-owl hours, waking around six in the evening or so, sleeping around eight or nine in the morning.
After I had showered and changed, I headed for the kitchen to grab something to eat when I heard a knock at the door. Thinking it was probably Matt coming to check on me, I unlocked the door and swung it open, only to come face to face with the man haunting my dreams.
"Angelus," I gasped. I could feel my breath stop in my chest and I just stood there, frozen.
"Can I come in?" he asked, the emotion obviously absent from his voice.
"Why?"
"We need to talk."
"I have nothing to say to you."
"Then I'll talk and you'll listen."
"Leave," I told him as I began closing the door.
"I love you," he called back, stopping me in my tracks. I couldn't stop the tears from falling at the words.
"Bastard," I hissed at him, "how dare you come back here after what you did and say that to me?"
"There's more. But I don't intend to say it all out here," he replied calmly.
"Fine," I answered him, gritting my teeth, repressing my hated and anger, "come in."
I watched him closely as he entered into the apartment, my every muscle tense and ready to react at the slightest hint of an attack. But it never came.
I closed the door and followed him inside, folding my arms over my chest. "OK," I informed him, "talk."
His back was still to me, and I watched as his head dropped in a gesture that invoked memories from an age so long ago…an age of Slayers and Slayerettes, happy and thriving. An age when a certain souled vampire walked among us.
"Angel?"
End Part 23
He whirled around, his face a mirror of hatred, "I am not Angel!" he practically snarled. I was shocked at the rage on his face and my lips answered of their own accord, "I'm sorry…"
I could visibly see him try to regain control, and he succeeded. "It's alright," he told me. I watched him a bit nervously as he approached me and took my hands, "Willow…"
I didn't know what to think, much less say. "Why?" I asked him.
He looked confused at first, but he figured out what I was talking about. "Power is very appealing to a demon."
"Then why let me go?"
Angelus expelled a breath he didn't have as he pulled me to him and sat us down on my couch. "You're not going to believe this," he told me, "hell, I hardly believe it myself, but I had a very…informative talk with Spike."
"He's still alive?" I asked in amazement. No one had even heard from him in over five years.
"Yeah. I went to stay with him for awhile after you left. We talked. I told him about you. He wasn't surprised."
"I'm confused."
"Contrary to popular belief, Willow, vampires are capable of feeling and love. They just never admit it."
"I don't want to go down that road, Angelus," I told him as I tried to stand up. He grasped my wrist and kept me seated, however.
"But we are going down that road, Willow," he answered me, "whether we like it or not. We've been down that road. Neither of us may want to admit it, but it's there. You love me."
"Loved," I told him, "as in past tense." It was only a half-lie.
"More like present tense," he corrected, "I can still read your eyes, Willow."
"You've spent way too much time with Spike," I informed him.
"No, not enough time," he partially laughed at himself as he spoke, "who'd have thought that my childe would have ended up smarted than me? At least he's able to admit to himself what the majority of us can't."
For the first time since the night Oz died, I felt a pang of guilt for killing Drusilla. Poor Spike. Wait a minute? Poor Spike? Since when did I start going soft on all these murdering, vicious, vampires?
I was just about to kick Angelus out when he continued, "I knew about Fiorolc's arrival when I first showed up in New York. And yes, I had planned this thing from the very beginning. But one thing I didn't expect was to fall in love with you. You fascinated me, Willow. You captured my attention, my dead heart. You awakened a part of me that had been dead for centuries. But when the time came, I couldn't give up the power. I thought once you were dead, once I had the power, the hold you had over me would be broken. Then I started thinking about what the years would be like without you. What good is ruling a world when you have no one to enjoy ruling it with? I couldn't bring myself to kill you. For the first time since I was changed, I couldn't kill a mortal."
"That's why you let me go," I whispered.
He nodded his head, "But then you left. And I had no idea what was going on. I hated the fact that I wasn't in control. But Willow, I love you. And I don't want to mess things up with you. You have to know now that I could never hurt you."
He reached out and caressed my face and for a moment I let myself revel in the feel of his touch. But then reality sank in, "You tried to kill me once; I can't be sure that you won't try again."
Angelus' hand dropped and I knew he was upset. "I can't bring myself to trust you," I clarified, "even if I wanted to."
"But you still love me."
"No, I don't. You don't know what I feel."
"Then why don't you tell me."
"You really want to know?" I asked him. When he nodded his head, I continued, "fine. I hate you. I hated you then, and I hate you even more now. But yes, I did love you. Don't ask me why. Maybe you interested me, too. Maybe I was just lonely. Maybe it was just momentary lapse in judgement. I don't know. But I loved you. I defended you to Buffy and Xander and Giles, and you betrayed me. You tried to kill me. And I hate you for it."
"You hate me because I betrayed you. But you don't hate *me*, the vampire."
"It's the same thing."
"No, it isn't. You hate what I did, but you don't hate me."
"When did you get a psychology degree?"
"Well, you'd think after being around for a couple hundred years, a guy would learn something."
I couldn't help laughing at his statement. Men, dead or alive, they were all the same: perpetually confused. "It's nice to see you smile," he said.
"Are you lying to me?" I asked.
"Of course not. You have a beautiful smile."
I laughed again and corrected myself, "What I mean is…are you lying about what you feel?"
I watched as the laughter disappeared from Angelus' eyes and he became serious again. "I'm not that good of an actor," was all he said.
I desperately wanted to believe him, and I think a part of me already did.
End Part 24
"How is it that you know me so well?" I asked him.
"Maybe because we're alike?"
I raised a skeptical eyebrow at him and he rushed to clarify, "Not in the mortal-vampire sense. But in the sense of interests, loves, thoughts, feelings…"
With each word he brought his lips a little bit closer until they rested over mine. As he kissed me, I felt that familiar electric current. This had always felt so right.
I brought my arms to rest around his neck and tangled my fingers in his dark, silky, hair, pulling him closer to me. I felt his hands slide underneath my shirt and slowly begin to massage the muscles in my lower back.
I began kissing my way down his neck as he picked me up and carried me into the bedroom. Laying me down on the bed, he covered my body with his own as his tongue sought entrance into my mouth. I removed his shirt just moments after mine had landed on the floor beside the bed, needing to feel his cool skin on my burning flesh.
Once again we entered into the age-old dance of man and woman, giving into each other fully and completely. And as we came together, I knew once and for all that this was the way it was supposed to be; this was what was right. I was finally complete.
***
Hours later, I awoke to find myself buried in the comfort of Angelus' arms. I maneuvered slightly so I could obtain access to his lips and kissed him.
"Awake?" he asked.
"No, I'm still asleep," I replied, smiling.
"Then maybe I should wake you fully," he teased. I smiled at him and said, "Maybe you should."
He gathered me into his arms and kissed me passionately. "You know I love you, Willow," he assured me, "and we can make this work. I'll work for your trust if that's what you want, but I will earn it."
"I know this isn't what you want to hear," I said to him, "but you are going to have to earn my complete trust. I can't walk blindly into that again. And you can't expect me to, either."
"I know," he said, the emotion evident this time.
"But I do love you," I added.
He looked up to meet my gaze and grinned, "I knew it."
"No, you didn't. As much as you wanted to believe it, you had your doubts. You're just too arrogant to admit it."
"But that's why you love me."
"It's not the only reason," I said, purposely running my hands over his perfectly chiseled chest.
"I'd hope not."
"I love you," I said it again, feeling like I couldn't say it enough.
"I love you, too," he answered, pulling me into his embrace, "and I
always will."
The End