Unexpected Reunion

Pairing: Liam/William

Rating: NC-17

This is for belleimani who requested the following:
Personas: Doctors.
Three things I want: Shower scene, crash of some kind, and a crying scene.
Two things I don't want: Spike as helpless or a whore. I hate that.
Tone: Dark Humor.
Rating: No Preference

Author Notes #1: This story was written for sangpassionne's Spangel Human AU Ficathon. I hope belleimani likes this story and that I incorporated everything she was hoping for. I know I didn’t include the dark humor she requested, and I apologize for that. I didn’t have a clue on how to write that.

Author Notes #2: This is the first time I’ve written a fic all by myself. I usually write with co-writer. I would like to give out mucho thanks and props to Lori, marymuse, and fierydemise, who without their assistance, I don’t think this story could have been written.

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~Part: 1~

Dr Liam McAllister made his rounds, checking on his patients. He enjoyed morning rounds best of all; he loved seeing the children bright and early. As he made his rounds, he’d pop into each room and grab each child’s chart. He would review it for updates on the patient’s condition. No matter how rough the kids’ night was or how bad they were feeling, each one would greet him with a huge smile when he walked into their room. He loved his "kids." He knew that he shouldn't be so attached to them, but he couldn't help himself; the children easily stole his heart. He shared the joy when they got well and were able to go home, and he grieved for them when they didn't.

“Good morning, Miss Katie.” He sang as he walked into her room. He waited patiently while the nurse, Joyce Summers, finished recording her vitals.

“Morning, Dr. Angel,” Katie giggled.

Liam looked at Joyce when he heard her try to stifle a giggle at Katie’s remark. Liam didn’t mind at all. He knew that she thought the nickname the children gave him was funny, and he heard it discussed amongst the other nurses. Joyce had told him that she thought the nickname was perfect for him as he had the face of an angel and a caring manner. In fact, she told him many times that she worried about him. She spoke frequently to him about how emotionally attached he got with the children, and that it wasn’t good for him. But he refused to listen to her. He explained that it was wasn’t in his nature to be detached. He believed that acting normally with the children gave them hope. She said that she understood where he was coming from, but that it didn’t stop her from worrying about him every time he lost one.

When she finished taking Katie’s vitals, she recorded them in the chart, and then handed it to Dr. McAllister. With her job done, she left the room. Liam saw the frown on her face before she left. They both knew that things weren’t looking good for Katie, and he knew that she was worried about how he’d take it if they couldn’t find a specialist quickly enough to help Katie.

Joyce returned to the nurses’ station to see how the new nurse, Cordy, was faring. As she walked up to the station, she saw the young girl gazing dreamily into Katie’s room.

“You had better get those ideas out of your head,” she told the younger nurse.

“I know…I know, but it should be against the law for someone that good-looking, and a doctor to boot, to be gay! It’s not fair!!” Cordy whined good-naturedly.

The older nurse laughed out loud at Cordy’s frustration. All the nurses shared her feelings. Even though they all knew he was gay, they still refused to stop daydreaming about his movie star good looks, his charming smile, and his soft voice.

“So do you have the time to tell me why all the kids and nurses call him Dr. Angel?” Cordy asked, still staring into Katie’s room.

“Sure. It happened a few years ago, when Dr. McAllister first joined the staff here. Actually, it was one of his patients that gave him the name. Susan was dying and was in and out of consciousness. We all knew that she wouldn’t last much longer. Dr. McAllister refused to leave her side. He even stayed when he was off duty. At the end, Susan didn’t know what was going on, and she kept calling him my angel. The day she died, she opened her eyes and asked him if he was an angel come to take her to heaven. He told her yes, and she passed away with a smile on her face. The kids have called him Dr. Angel ever since, as have the nurses.

Cordy smiled as Joyce finished her story. “How does he do it?” Cordy asked.

“Do what?” Joyce asked.

“Get so attached to them, knowing that there is nothing he can do to save some of them.”

“I know. Everyone has talked to him about it, but it doesn’t make a difference.” Joyce stated sadly.

Just then the phone rang. Cordy answered it, “7th Floor Nurses Station. Dr. McAllister is making his rounds now. Yes. I’ll tell him right away.”

She hung up and turned to the older nurse. “That was the Chief of Staff’s office. Dr. Giles wants to see him right away. They found a specialist, and he’s agreed to help with Katie.”

“That’s great news. Dr. McAllister will be so relieved. I’ll go tell him.” Joyce walked quickly towards Katie’s room to give him the good news.

As she walked into Katie’s room, she could hear Dr. McAllister finishing up one of his many stories that the children loved hearing. He had the gift of imagination and knew how to weave a riveting tale.

“Excuse me, Dr. McAllister…”

“Yes, Joyce,” he responded.

“Dr. Giles would like to see you in his office right away. They’ve found the specialist you’ve been looking for.”

“That’s wonderful news!” He leaned down and kissed Katie on the top of her head. “I’ll be right back Katie. Okay?”

“Okay, Dr. Angel. I’ll be here waiting.” She smiled as he reached town and tucked her back into bed tightly. As he left her room, he turned around and looked at her with a newfound hope in his eyes.

Liam made his way up to the Chief of Staff’s office with a light step. He was so relieved they were able to find someone after weeks of searching. Liam was close to giving up hope that they would be able to help Katie in time. If a treatment wasn’t found soon, he knew that Katie would never survive.

He stopped his musings when he realized he was standing in front of the Chief of Staff’s office door. He knocked.

“Come in.” Dr. Giles answered from within.

As Liam entered the office, his eyes widened in shock when he realized whom the specialist was. This can’t be happening. For a moment Liam thought he might actually still be in bed dreaming – dreaming about Will in his bed again. That was the only explanation he was willing to accept, anything else would be too much. Liam was afraid to let his eyes see what his heart already knew to be true. Instead he focused his attention on Dr. Giles. Old familiar feelings danced behind his eyes, so he closed them in an attempt to regain some of his composure. Come on, get a grip! He had almost convinced himself that it was just an apparition in front of him until he heard the voice – a voice he hadn’t heard in a long time. It was the voice he kept hearing in his dreams – a voice he’d recognize anywhere. “Liam, I’m so sorry. I didn’t want you to find out this way. I just…I didn’t know how to tell you.”

Liam’s heart pounded in his chest as the owner of the voice slowly walked towards him. Old memories crashed unbidden. Oh God. He is still so beautiful. Those blue eyes -- how they cut into my soul! His smile – God -- still makes me melt.

“Hello Liam.” William spoke tentatively

His hair is longer – the same soft brown. How I loved tangling my fingers in those curls.

“Will?” He answered, still unable to believe the ghost from his past was standing in front of him. The past fought its way to the surface of his mind. Will lying naked before the fireplace, his skin burnished gold in the firelight, flushed pink from wine and sex.

“So you two know do each other?” Dr. Giles asked. Liam suspected that he was trying to ease the tension that was creeping into the room. “I wondered if you two knew each other seeing that you both attended University of California, San Francisco Medical School at the same time.” Dr. Giles glanced from Liam to William. As Liam followed his gaze, he saw William staring at him with a warm smile. He hoped that his own shock about the situation didn’t show too plainly on his face.

William was the first to respond, “Yes, we know each. Actually…”

Worried that William would tell the story, Liam interrupted suddenly, “Yes, we had classes together, but we really didn’t know each other well.” Damn. I thought I was over him. I thought the ache was buried. He can still make my heart beat fast. Fuck, of all people, why did it have to be him?

William looked at Liam with a raised eyebrow at that last statement.

“Yes…well…that’s good you two know each other. I think it will make working together much easier.” Dr. Giles said to the two men.

"I've been hearing about the great success you've been having with seriously ill patients, Liam." William spoke quietly. "Many who might not have made it elsewhere seem to almost thrive in your care."

"Yes, Dr. McAllister is a favorite among the children. They respond to him immediately. I've heard that they call him Dr. Angel." Dr. Giles said with a trace of humor in his voice.

Liam stood quietly, the shock now gone from his face. "I do what I've trained for -- I take care of sick children. They give me more than I could ever give them." Liam replied, glancing at William.

"No you do more Doctor. I know you're here even when you aren’t on call. The nurses always worry that you never rest." Dr. Giles remarked.

"Ah, the nurses. Yes, even at UCSF, the nurses looked out for Liam, and they were always confiding in him." William spoke with a trace of fondness and humor.

Liam's head shot up and he glared at William. I wasn’t the one sleeping with nurses you bastard! Memories cascaded through his mind. He was exhausted. Interning was brutal. He had been on for two days, but he had great news and couldn’t wait to tell Will. He and Will would both be able to stay in San Francisco for their residencies. Will in Oncology; he in Pediatrics. It was late, so it didn’t surprise him that Will wasn’t awake when he got home. But he had to tell him. He walked to their room. The door was closed. That’s unusual. He pushed open the door. Will? He was stunned by what he saw.

Liam was jarred from his reverie by Dr. Giles’ voice, "Liam I want you to take Dr. Radcliffe around. Show him the facilities, but of course, take him to meet Katie first," the Chief of Staff said. “Dr. Radcliffe, my secretary said you had arranged your own hotel accommodations.”

“Yes sir. I’ve got a room at the Sorrento Hotel. It’s only a block away from the hospital. And, please call me Will.”

Liam’s heart turned over. How many times had he screamed that name in ecstasy?

“Oh, good. That hotel is always booked -- too many medical conferences since it’s so close to the hospital.” Dr. Giles smiled. “Well, you’ll have to excuse me. I have a staff meeting. I’m glad you were available, Dr. Radcliffe. We have several patients that will benefit from your expertise. Katie, of course, is the most pressing case. Show him around Liam.”

“Yes sir.” Liam answered as Dr. Giles left his office.

Liam turned toward the door. He spoke without looking at William. "Come Doctor, I'll introduce you to Katie. I hope you have some new ideas on how to help her."

William had to walk quickly to catch up to his old classmate.

"Liam. I knew you were here. I’ve read your articles in Pediatrics. I knew about the good work you’ve been doing. I thought I could help, but that's not the only reason I came. I wanted to see you again."

Liam was all business. He strode down the hall, never looking at William. "The patient's name is Katie Grimes, age 7. As you must know, she has Trilateral Retinoblastoma, an ocular malignancy that frequently creates tumors in the brain. It hasn’t gotten that far yet. Chemotherapy and radiation therapy have helped and we haven’t had to resort to a macroscopic surgical resection. As we both know, most surgeries are unsuccessful and patients die within 8-12 months despite treatment. She went into remission for a few months, but it’s making a reappearance. I want to stop it before it spreads to her brain, because once that happens, there is nothing that we can do and that is unacceptable to me.” Liam’s thoughts flew back again to seven years ago. Pale candlelight glowed next to the bed. The bed was not empty -- Will was there holding a dark-haired woman – holding her the same way he would hold me after hours of passionate love-making. Will startled awake and stared at Liam. A moment later the woman stirred and opened her eyes. It was Dru, a nurse from the hospital -- a friend, or so he thought. She sat up, pulling the sheets to cover her naked body. He had confided in her. She knew I was worried because Will hadn’t told his parents about us.

The new doctor sighed. "Right, thank you doctor. I have some new ideas; we're having great success..."

"Here's her room," Liam interrupted.

Liam visually brightened as he entered the room. "Katie, I've brought a new doctor to see you."

Katie looked at William. "You are not quite as handsome as Dr. Angel. Are you as kind and funny as he is?"

William laughed loudly, which made Katie smile even wider. "Yes, Dr. Angel is quite attractive. I knew him a long time ago. He's gotten even better looking, Katie."

Liam glowered at William while grinding his teeth brutally. William ignored Liam’s obvious discomfort and continued talking to Katie. “So tell me, what do you like best about Dr. McAllister?”

The little girl giggled, “Dr. Angel.”

“That’s right, I forgot. Okay, what do you like best about Dr. Angel?” William asked again.

“Well, he’s really nice,” Katie started.

“That he is.” William responded. “What else?”

“He tells the most wonderful stories. Has he ever told you a story?” Katie asked.

“Can’t say that he has.”

“Well you should have him tell you one sometime.” Katie looked over at Liam and smiled. Liam smiled back at her fondly as he watched William brush the curls from her face. She’s been through so much and she never complains. I have to save her. I can’t fail -- I just can’t. Will was always the brightest in our class. He had articles published before he even graduated from med school. He is our last hope. I’ll work with him. I must. God, I hope he can help her.

“Dr. Radcliffe, can you tell good stories like Dr. Angel?” Katie asked turning her gaze back to William.

“I don’t know. I’ve never tried.”

“Well if you ever wanted to try one out on someone, I’d listen.”

“You would? I may take you up on that.” William said.

Katie noticed the sad look that crossed his face. She saw it change quickly when he realized she was watching him. “Why did you look so sad just now, Dr. Radcliffe?” she asked.

“What? Oh, it wasn’t anything. I was just thinking.” William responded.

“Well, let me tell you – you should talk to Dr. Angel. He’s a great listener. I’m sure he could help you if you have a problem. He listens to us all the time.”

Liam didn’t look at William. “Well Katie, we have to get going. I’m going to take Dr. Radcliffe to meet Nurse Joyce and Cordy.”

Katie looked at William, “You’ll love Nurse Joyce. She’s the best. It never hurts when she takes my blood, and she talks to me like I’m a big girl, not a kid -- just like Dr. Angel does.” She squeezed Liam’s hand and looked up at him, smiling happily. “Nurse Cordy is nice too, and she’s really pretty. I’m sure you’ll like her.” Katie winked at William. “Won’t he Dr. Angel?”

“I’m sure he will, Katie. I’m sure he will.” Liam couldn’t keep the bitterness out of his voice. William stumbling out of bed, naked. Hurrying to put on his sweats, following Liam into the living room. “Liam, wait. God, I’m sorry you found out this way.”

He turned and snarled at his lover. “Find out what, Will? How long has this been going on?”

“A few months. I’ve been meaning to tell you but I…I didn’t know how.” Will’s face was pale. He was shaking.

“Didn’t know how? How about – “Hey Liam, just thought I’d mention that I’m fucking around on you with one of the nurses from the hospital!”

“Come on Liam, don’t be so dramatic. It’s not like that!”

Liam was suddenly jarred out of his musings by Katie’s clapping hands. “Oh Dr. Angel. I just had a great idea. You should see if Nurse Cordy would go out with Dr. Radcliffe. I bet they’d be perfect together.”

William interrupted Katie quickly, wanting to stop where she was going. “That’s a nice thought, Katie, but there is someone that I’m already interested in.”

“Really, well I hope she’s nice.”

“Very nice indeed, Katie.” William looked directly at Liam as he answered Katie.

Liam’s memories continued tumbling into his thoughts. “Dramatic! We’ve lived together for a year. How many other women have you fucked in our bed, Will? How many men? There has been no one else for me for five years. I have only been with you. I thought you loved me! Do you love her?”

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know? Oh that’s a good answer. No wonder you’ve never wanted to go public about us. You were still deciding which side you preferred!”

“It’s not like that Liam and you know it. We’ve had this conversation before and you were okay with keeping our relationship quiet until I became comfortable enough to come out to my family. They’re not like yours. They wouldn’t take this well.”

Liam tried to look anywhere but at William. His emotions were warring with each other for control -- anger, hurt, betrayal. Afraid to stay in Katie’s room a moment longer, he put on a smile and ruffled her curls again. “Well Katie, we have to go now.”

Katie frowned. “Are you all right Dr. Angel? Is something wrong? You look mad.”

Liam held her tiny hand. “Nothing’s wrong darling. I was trying to remember something, but I’ve lost it. Don’t you hate it when that happens?”

“Oh yes. That happens to my daddy a lot. See you tomorrow Dr. Radcliffe. It was so nice to meet you.” Katie smiled and waved to them as Liam and William walked out the door.

Liam led William over to the nurses’ station. “Ladies, this is Dr. William Radcliffe. He'll be working on Katie's case with me, and I want you all to treat him the same way you would me."

Joyce cut him off good naturedly, "You mean harass him about getting too attached to his patients, making certain he gets enough to eat, and trying to set him up on dates with your sister's nephew?" William laughed loudly at Joyce’s words.

“Better make that your sister’s niece, Joyce.” Liam ground out, looking furiously at William as he recalled the scene in the apartment.

“Will, we’ve known each other for five years. We’ve lived together for a year and you still haven’t told them. I understood the position you were in. I loved you enough to be patient; wait until you were ready, but now I see that you were never going to tell them. I was such a fool. And you are…” Dru walked out of the bedroom.

“Come on Dru, I’ll take you home.” Will said quietly.

I stood there, fighting tears, trying to stop my heart from crumbling. “Get out, both of you.” He walked into the bedroom and waited till he heard them leave. Liam closed his eyes as he remembered his actions after they left. Ripping off the sheets, he flung himself onto the bare mattress and sobbed his grief and fury.

William stopped laughing immediately and looked at Liam, but he wouldn’t meet William’s eyes. Joyce noticed this immediately. When she saw the sadness in Liam’s eyes and traces of the same in William’s, she wondered. These boys have a past. Liam is almost seething and Will looks so sad. That’s why Liam is always alone! He always kindly rebuffs any overtures by other gay doctors on staff or any attempts by nurses to fix him up. They’ve been finished with their residencies for years. Liam is still hurting? What could have happened that he’s kept it simmering so long? William must have broken his heart. She knew that she had to help them get past whatever it was. She loved Liam as a son -- a son she always wanted. She wanted him to be happy. If Will had been important enough to evoke these emotions years later, it had to be powerful. If Will made Liam happy once upon a time, somehow she would see that he did again.

After a bit more small talk with Joyce and Cordy, Liam spoke to William in a harsh tone. “Dr. Radcliffe, I’ll show you our oncology suite. You must meet Dr. Mendoza -- Dr. Simone Mendoza. You and she will be working closely together to find a way to help Katie and several other patients. William looked at Liam, pain fleeing across his face. He looked at Joyce and nodded toward the meds room.

“I’ll catch up in a minute Dr. McAllister.”

“Fine Doctor. I’ll stop to see a patient. I’ll be in Room 614.”

Dr. McAllister’s demeanor stunned Cordy. She was about to discuss his unusual behavior with Joyce, when a patient buzzed.

“You’d better take that Cordy. It’s Jeremy. Dr. McAllister mentioned that he was sicker than usual after his last procedure.” Joyce realized that Dr. Radcliffe wanted to speak with her.

“Doctor. Let me show you our meds room. William followed her into the small room. Joyce shut the door leaving Cordy even more puzzled.

A few minutes later, William stopped by Room 614. He waited until Liam was finished talking with his patient. Liam walked out of the room and down the hall, barely glancing at William.

“So Liam, how do you like Seattle? I was surprised to hear that you had settled up here. I always figured you for a warm weather climate, with lots of sunshine and sandy beaches.”

Liam halted briefly at William’s words, but then walked even more quickly toward the lab. “Well I guess you didn’t know me quite as well as you thought. I love it up here.”

Liam was all business. He introduced William to Dr. Mendoza and the nurses and techs who worked in the lab. Liam’s beeper went off. It was the nurses’ station. “I have to take this. I’m leaving you in good hands Doctor.” He left the lab quickly.

“Joyce, you paged me?”

“Yes, Dr. McAllister.” She motioned for him to follow her into the tiny nursing office. She closed the door and turned to him. “Dr. McAllister, Dr. Radcliffe doesn’t really have a hotel room. Apparently the hotel lost his reservation. There are two medical conventions in the hotel and they don’t have any rooms available. I’ve called two other nearby hotels, but they’re booked as well. She looked at him expectantly, but the young doctor stood resolutely silent. She spoke a bit more forcefully. “Dr. McAllister, you have a two bedroom apartment. You’ll be working closely with Dr. Radcliffe. Could he stay with you for a few days until the conventions are over? I’d take him home with me but my sister is visiting with her twin boys and my house is bedlam.”

Liam’s heart constricted painfully.

“It should only be until Monday.”

It’s Friday. He’d have to stay the entire weekend! Liam sighed. He can stay in the apartment. I’ll just come in and sleep in the on call room.

“Sure, Joyce. That will be fine.” Liam tried to smile but didn’t quite manage it. “He’s in Oncology. Send him to me when he returns. I’ll be in the chart room.”

A few hours later, William found Liam in the chart room. He was dozing, sitting up, head on his hand, pen still clutched in his fingers. William gently touched his shoulder and Liam jumped. “What, yes, oh…” Liam blinked and suddenly realized where he was. He turned to look at William, blushing a bit. Recovering he said, “Dr. Radcliffe, Joyce informed me that you needed a place to stay for the weekend.”

William was taken aback. “Ah, um. Joyce said she’d try to find me another hotel, mine apparently lost…”

“Yes, she told me.” Liam interrupted. “You can stay with me. I have two bedrooms. I’ll probably be at the hospital most of the time anyway. Let me just check on Katie and we can leave.” Both men walked stiffly down the hall to the little girl’s room.

“Nurse Joyce said that you and Dr. Radcliffe were going to be roommates!” Katie smiled happily. “Dr. Radcliffe, I worry because Dr. Angel lives alone. No one should live alone, isn’t that right, Dr. Radcliffe?”

“Katie, we’re going to be working together. I think you should call me Dr. Will.” Will looked at the charming child. He felt Liam’s eyes piercing his back. “Yes, Katie. It isn’t good to be alone though sometimes things happen…”

Liam cleared his throat. “Dr. Radcliffe and I have to go now. Goodnight darling.” He turned and walked quickly out of the room.

“I’ll make sure he isn’t lonely while I’m here Katie.” William winked at her and she giggled.

“Good night Dr. Will. I am so glad you’re here.”

“Me too Katie. Me too.”

William met Liam at the nurses’ station. “Where are your bags, Doctor?” Liam’s tone was almost harsh.

“In the on call room,” William replied. Both men walked to the tiny room. “There. In the corner.” William pointed.

Liam’s heart banged against his chest. A brown, battered leather duffle stood next to a newer bag. He still has it! He recalled the birthday when he had given it to Will. His twenty-fifth. They had toured the wineries in Napa -- both of them had gotten a bit drunk. He made Will go up to the room alone, and he got the bag out of the hidden compartment in the trunk of the car. Will loved it. They never got down to the restaurant to eat. They ordered room service and made love over and over all night long.

Liam took the newer bag and stalked toward the door. William knew Liam had remembered giving it to him for his birthday. He picked up the bag, caressing the soft leather, much like he used to caress Liam.

“Are you coming Doctor?” Liam asked impatiently from the doorway. “Do you want to get a taxi? It’s just three blocks away.”

“No, I’d like to walk, if you don’t mind. I need to unwind a bit.”

Liam didn’t answer. They walked down the hill to Liam’s apartment in total silence. William glanced over at Liam and watched him walk, hand in one pocket and looking straight ahead, his entire body like a tightly coiled spring. William tried to start a conversation, but Liam didn’t seem interested, so William stopped trying.

Liam saw William continuously looking at him and opening his mouth like he wanted to say something. As he walked, more memories tumbled into focus -- sailing near Sausalito; a bed and breakfast in Carmel; wineries in Napa; days in the sun; and nights of unbridled passion.

William’s voice shook him out of his reverie, “I’m surprised you’re living in the city. I figured you’d be out in the suburbs somewhere.”

“Yes, well, this is more convenient. I don’t have to worry about traffic. I can walk back to the hospital quickly if I’m called, but taxis are usually available if I have to rush. It suits the crazy hours. I can come home to sleep and not have to stay in the on call room. It’s always too bright and noisy. You know I…” Liam stopped, surprised at his lengthy comment. “Here we are.” They entered a softly lit lobby. It looked almost too homey for an apartment building. Liam went over to the concierge. “Wes, this is a colleague of mine. He’ll be staying with me for a few days. Can you make a key for him?”

“Sure thing doc. I’ll get right on it.” The young man replied smiling. Wesley was twenty-one. He worked part-time at night at the apartment building and took his graduate school courses during the day. He hoped to get his Master’s by the end of the semester. He’d already been accepted into the PhD. program. Dr. McAllister had written him a recommendation. He hoped to become a professor at the University of Washington in the Philosophy Department. He was really interested in ethics. He and Dr. McAllister had talked a bit about medical ethics. It was a challenging course of study.

“Thanks Wes.” With that taken care of, Liam headed over to the elevators with William following him.

As they rode the elevator, Liam ignored William as he tried to start a conversation with him. “Look Liam, I know you aren’t happy with me being here but you can’t continue to ignore me. Why don’t you stop being so pig-headed and talk to me.”

Liam glared at William and opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted with the ding of the doors opening. Liam stormed out of the elevator and down the hall to his apartment. When he got the door opened, he went toward the spare bedroom and threw the bag on the floor beside the entrance. William entered and closed the door, waiting for the storm that was about to come.

Liam came back down the hall furious. “TALK!! Now you want to talk! You sure as hell didn’t want to talk before you walked out seven years ago. You didn’t want to talk when I found you in bed with someone else. Hell, I never even heard from you after you left!” Liam yelled loudly.

“Liam…”

“No, Will. I wanted to talk back then, but you didn’t. You just walked out, left me there with no explanation. Nothing. When I came back to the apartment after my shift, you had taken all your things. There wasn’t a trace of you left -- not even a note. So why are you so surprised at my reaction to your sudden appearance in Seattle? We no longer have anything to talk about. I just don’t care anymore. I’ll work with you to help Katie, but that’s it. You lost any right to my friendship when you decided to cheat on me. Is that enough talking for you?” Liam was close to tears, but he was damned if he was going to show Will. He wasn’t going to show him how much he was still hurting.

“Your room is over there.” He pointed down the short hallway. “There is a bathroom next to it. You can see the kitchen, feel free to help yourself to whatever you want if you’re hungry.” With that, he turned his back and stormed into his bedroom, slamming the door trying to force the painful memories back into the recesses of his mind.
 

~Part: 2~

William sighed at the slamming of the door. He knew that the wounds he inflicted on Liam all those years ago ran deep, he just didn’t realize until now how deep they ran. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all. Maybe I should just help him with Katie, and then go back to New York. William picked up his bags and headed to the room that Liam had pointed out. He placed them on the bed and started unpacking, all the while listening for any movement or sound from the room across from his. When he finished unpacking, he grabbed some sweats and headed to the bathroom. I’ll feel better after a shower, and maybe by then Liam will have calmed down enough for another attempt. I’ve got to get him to understand. I wasn’t sure who I was. I was terrified. I loved Liam, but it would have been so much easier to be with a woman. My father would have withdrawn all support if I told him I was gay. I had to finish my training.

Liam heard the shower being turned on. He rolled over to his back and threw his arm across his eyes. He lay there, not wanting to even think about how he exploded at Will and the reason behind it. Dammit!! Why does this have to be happening now? Why did Will have to be the specialist needed to help with Katie? Well maybe he’s gotten the point now and will drop it once and for all. Liam got up and headed to his closet. As he started pulling out dirty laundry, he saw the box pushed far back on the floor. Against his better judgment, he forgot about the clothes and dragged the box out and put it on the bed. I thought I threw this stuff out. Liam couldn’t help himself. He reached into the box, pulling the items out one by one, remembering. He pulled out pictures of Will smiling, acting silly. His heart began to ache again but he didn’t stop. He pulled out pictures of the two of them in – happier days. With tears forming in his eyes, he looked at pictures from their outings in San Francisco -- China Town, Fisherman’s Wharf, Ghirardelli Square.

There were sketches too – his drawings of Will posing for him. There were several of Will when he didn’t know Liam was drawing him. He pulled out the last one. It was of Will right before he left. They had gone to Carmel for the weekend. They had found a nice secluded spot on the water. Will had fallen asleep on the blanket. Liam remembered pulling out his sketch pad and drawing his lover sleeping peacefully.

It was the last time he ever drew anything. He traced his fingers over the figure on the paper, remembering, but not wanting to. He was my best friend. We spent hours talking. I told him everything. He taught me how to really love. Not just sex, although that was amazing, but caring, devotion. I had never known such happiness. I knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. We could … The phone intruded on his reverie. He wiped away the tears that memories had washed over his face. He picked up the phone. It was the hospital calling about one of his patients.

As he walked out of his bedroom, William was leaving the bathroom.

“That was the hospital. I have to go back in. There’s a problem with one of my patients. I shouldn’t be that long.”

“Need any help?” William asked, noticing his red-rimmed eyes.

“No, but thanks.” He had to get away from Will and the resurfacing memories that had been bombarding him since that morning in Dr. Giles’ office. “Help yourself to whatever is in the fridge or if you want take-out, the menus are in the drawer next to the stove.”

“Okay, thanks.” Before William finished speaking, Liam was out the door in a rush.

Alone now, William walked back toward his room. Before he went in, he looked through the open door of Liam’s room and saw the mess on his bed. Telling himself that he was only helping Liam, he walked over the bed to put the items back in the box. As he began, he noticed the pictures and drawings. He couldn’t help himself. He knew he was intruding, but he was surprised to find out that Liam had kept them all these years.

With each picture and drawing he returned to the box, his mind was awash with corresponding memories. All the places we visited -- all our moments together. He kept all of it. He came to the last picture. He and Liam in Carmel right before… A wave of sadness washed over his heart. God, if I could only take back that night. Hell, I wish I could take back the months that preceded that moment. I was such an idiot. It’s taken me seven years to realize what I lost. Now I have to get it back. He sat for a moment unwilling to let the memories fade. Finally, William got up off the bed and headed for the kitchen to make something to eat.

Talking to himself, he started working out a plan to get Liam back. “I have to get him to listen to me. I know it won’t be easy. I should have remembered his depth of emotion. I should have known he wouldn’t forget. He can be such a stubborn ass.” He thought exasperated. “I’m not leaving Seattle until he knows how much I’ve missed him, us and how much I regret what happened. Hopefully I won’t be leaving Seattle at all.”

Just as he was sitting at the table, the phone rang. Getting back up, he walked over and answered it, “Hello.”

“Dr. Radcliffe?”

“Yes, this is Dr. Radcliffe.”

“Doctor, this is Joyce…from the hospital.”

“Oh right. What can I do for you Joyce? If you looking for Dr. McAllister, he’s already left for the hospital.”

The woman’s voice quavered. “That’s not what I’m calling about. I mean…its Dr. McAllister…I thought you should know.”

“Know what Joyce? What’s going on?”

It was obvious that the woman was crying. “Dr. McAllister was just brought into the emergency room.”

“What?!” No, this can’t be. Not now. Liam. Oh God – Liam!

“The ER phoned. A car hit him on his way back to the hospital. He’s seriously hurt.” Joyce didn’t try to keep the sob from her voice.

“Okay Joyce. I’m leaving for the hospital now. I just need time to grab a taxi. Can you tell him I’m on my way?”

“I would, but he came in unconscious, and he’s in surgery now.”

William’s anxiety grew. Patients brought in unconscious usually had serious head trauma. “I’ll be there. Are you with him? Oh, of course. Yes, I will call you as soon as I find anything out. Thank you Joyce.” He hung up and then picked up the phone to call for a taxi, finding the number on a card pinned on a small bulletin board on the kitchen wall. Of course -- another memory rushed in. Liam, never late, always neat, everything organized.

Miraculously by the time he got downstairs, the taxi was waiting. Wes walked toward him.

“Here’s your key sir.”

Distracted, William took the key. “Thank you.” He raced out of the building, threw himself into the taxi and told the driver he was a doctor, he had an emergency and to step on it.

As the taxi pulled up in front of the ER, William quickly handed the driver the fare and raced through the doors. He looked around frantically, trying to find someone to help him. He noticed the nurse at the check-in desk and hurried over.

“Excuse me.” The nurse looked up at him. “May I help you sir?”

“I hope so. I was just told that a good friend of mine was hit by a car and brought in here. His name is Liam McAllister. He’s a doctor here.”

“Yes, but he’s still in surgery. You are?”

“Sorry, I’m William Radcliffe – Dr. William Radcliffe. I’m here assisting Dr. McAllister on a case.”

“Well Dr. Radcliffe, he’ll be in surgery for a while yet. When they are done, I’ll send the surgeon over to you. You can have a seat over there.”

“Thanks. By the way, can I use your phone to call upstairs.” William grabbed the receiver as the nurse pushed the phone over to him. He called upstairs. “Joyce, it’s Dr. Radcliffe. Yes, I’m in the ER now. Liam’s still in surgery; I’m waiting to talk to the surgeon. I just wanted to let you know that I was here and will let you know as soon as I have some information. Thank you for calling me Joyce. I really appreciate it.”

When he hung up the phone, he thanked the nurse and headed over to the seating area, but he was too anxious to sit. He paced around the room, stopping to look out the window, seeing only Liam’s face in the glass. Memories of their meeting replayed in his mind.

The first day of medical school in the huge lecture hall. He came in late and took the first empty seat. Liam looked up at him and winked. He was startled but smiled. Liam introduced himself after the initial seminar and suggested that they get coffee. Since he was from back east, he didn’t know anyone and welcomed Liam’s overtures of friendship. Soon they were inseparable; studying together and having meals together. He often spent the night at Liam’s larger apartment, but always in the spare bedroom. He knew that Liam was gay, but his new friend never made any overtures toward him. They were friends, good friends. He knew there was something special about Liam. He began to feel something more than just friendship. He’d never been attracted to a man before; it was all new territory to him. He remembered when he told Liam about his attraction. The smile that graced Liam’s face was radiant. He had explained that Liam was the first man he’d ever been attracted to. Liam told him that they’d take it as slow as William needed. He was grateful for Liam’s understanding. He talked about his family; their intolerance of different lifestyles; their demands on him. Liam was willing to keep their relationship quiet until he was ready to come out. He told William that he was worth waiting for.

William smiled as the memories continued to wash over him, until he remembered the last night he saw Liam. His affair with Dru had been going on for a few months. He hadn’t meant for Liam to find out like that. He wanted to avoid hurting Liam, but he was so uncertain – not of Liam’s love for him. That he had never been unsure of. He was getting pressure from his parents about why he never brought a girl home; hadn’t he met anyone in med school? He didn’t know how to tell them. How could he when he had never given any inclination that he was gay? Was he gay? He knew he loved being with Liam. He was his best friend as well as his lover. But he was still uncertain. He knew that of all things he’d done, this was one thing his parents, especially his father, would never accept. He just thought it would be easier for everyone if he would just break it off with Liam. But Liam finding him in their bed with Dru was not the way he wanted to do it.

He knew he handled the entire situation badly. I should have gone back and talked it out with Liam. I should have explained my uncertainty. Liam was so patient and understanding. But no, I didn’t do that. I couldn’t face Liam so I came for my things when I knew he was on duty. I just couldn’t bear to see the devastation and hurt in Liam’s eyes. So I took the easy way out and just disappeared.

I tried to go back to the way I was before, dating women, but I wasn’t happy. I wasn’t even happy dating other men. They weren’t Liam. Liam is the only one I will ever be happy and at peace with. Why the hell has it taken me seven years to figure this out? Now I may never get the chance. Dammit it all to hell!! William threw himself down in the closest chair and put his head in his hands.

William jumped when he felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked up to see a doctor standing next to him. “Dr. Radcliffe?”

“Yes. Are you the surgeon that worked on Liam?” William looked at the doctor hopefully. “How is he?”

“His injuries are quite extensive. His right leg is broken in three places; he has a few broken ribs, which punctured his lungs. But I am most worried about his compressed skull fracture. We had to operate and implant a shunt to relieve pressure in his brain.” As you know, such trauma may disrupt normal electrical patterns in the brain. Parts of the brain may be destroyed as a result of the injury. The length of his coma is a pertinent factor. We have stabilized his leg, but he will need surgery to implant a rod. We cannot do that until he wakes up.”

“Oh God.” Tears started forming in William eyes.

“Can I see him?”

“He’s still unconscious and is still in recovery.”

“I don’t care. I have to see him!” William told the doctor adamantly.

“I’ll let you see him once we move him into his room. That should be in about an hour or so. I have to be honest with you Dr. Radcliffe, I’m not sure if he will recover fully. We just won’t know anything positive until he wakes up.”

“I understand Doctor. Call me when he’s moved. I’ll be up on the 7th floor. You can reach me through the nurses’ station. I want to know as soon as he’s settled. You understand me?”

“Yes, I do doctor. I’m really sorry about your friend, but rest assured, we’ll do everything we can for him.”

“Thank you.” William headed over to the bank of elevators.

When William arrived at the 7th Floor nurses’ station, he saw Joyce talking to the Chief of Staff. When they saw him, they asked if there was any word on Dr. McAllister. William repeated what the surgeon had told him.

“They are going to call me when Liam is settled in his room.

Dr. Giles, who is going to take over Dr. McAllister’s patients?” Joyce asked.

Before the Chief of Staff could respond, William piped in, “I’ll do it.”

“Thank you Dr. Radcliffe. Your help will be much appreciated. I’ll reassign a resident to assist you. We’ll have to explain to the children also.”

“If you don’t mind, I’d like to tell Katie. In fact, I’ll go and tell her now.”

“That’s fine. Joyce and I will tell the other children.”

William walked into Katie’s room. She was sitting up in bed with drawing paper strewn all over and a box of crayons dumped out on the bed. She was so intent in what she was doing, she didn’t hear William come in the room.

“Katie?”

“Oh hi, Dr. Will. I didn’t think I’d be seeing you till tomorrow. Where’s Dr. Angel?”

“That’s what I came in to tell you. Katie…” William’s voice trembled as he tried to get the words out. “Katie, Dr. Angel’s been in an accident. He’s hurt rather badly.”

“Is he going to be okay?” William could see her bottom lip start to quiver and tears form in her big blue eyes.

“I don’t know Katie, but we are going to do everything we can to make sure he is.” He saw the tears start to flow out of her eyes. He sat on the bed and took the small child into his arms. He held her tightly in his arms as she cried.

Just then there was a soft knock at the door. William looked up and saw Joyce standing there. “Yes, Joyce?”

“Dr. McAllister is in his room now.”

“Thank for letting me know Joyce.” William looked back down to Katie. Tears were still in her eyes, but she smiled at him bravely.

“You have to go to him Dr. Will. He’s all alone. He can’t be alone now; he needs you.”

“Don’t worry Katie. He won’t be alone. I’ll be there for him, you have my word on that.”

“You care for him, don’t you Dr. Will?”

“Yes I do Katie. Very much.”

“I feel better knowing that he has you to look after him.”

William smiled at Katie and placed a kiss on her forehead. “I’m going to go now and see how he’s doing. If it’s not too late, I’ll come back to check on you.” What an amazing little girl. She’s totally selfless. I’ve got to help her. Her health is so important to Liam.

“Thank you Dr. Will.” William got up off the bed and walked out of the room with Joyce.

“If you need me, have me paged down in Intensive Care.”

“I will. Please keep us informed on Dr. McAllister’s condition.”

“I’ll make sure of that Joyce.” William headed back to the elevators, head down and shoulders slumped.

When William arrived in Intensive Care, he told the nurse who he was and asked for Liam McAllister’s room. When William opened the door, his breath caught. As a doctor, he was used to seeing all the machines, but he wasn’t used to seeing Liam lying so still. He grabbed a chair and set it next to the bed. He sat down and took Liam’s hand in his. He drew Liam’s hand to his mouth and placed a soft kiss on the back of his hand. He touched the long, slender fingers. His tears began in earnest. He couldn’t stop them – so many tears of sadness and regret.

“Liam, come back to me. Liam...please, you can’t leave me. I love you. I’ve always loved you. I think I’ve loved you since the first time I saw you in class. I was such an idiot. You have to come back to me. I have to show you how much you mean to me. Please Liam! I need you in my life.” William placed his head on the bed, still holding Liam’s hand, murmuring words of love.

Several hours later, William was startled awake by a gentle shake. He raised his head groggily. He was still holding Liam’s hand. He let it go and wiped the sleep from his eyes and saw Joyce standing there.

“Dr. Radcliffe, you should go back to Liam’s apartment and get some rest. We won’t know anything until he wakes up. He’s stable now.”

“No, I’m not going anywhere. I’m not leaving him again,” William stated adamantly. “Can you see about having a cot brought in?”

“But…” She looked at him confused at his earlier words.

“Please Joyce, do this for me. I can’t leave him.”

“Okay, I’ll see what I can do.”

“Thank you. Can you also do me another favor?”

“Sure, anything.”

William handed her the key to Liam’s apartment. “Can you go and bring me some fresh clothes. In fact, just bring the brown leather bag. I’d really appreciate it.”

“No problem. I’m going off duty. I stop by and pick it up and bring it back.” She took the keys William handed her. She looked back once more, and saw William retake Liam’s hand and place a kiss to his palm. She quietly left the room.

~Part: 3~

For the next two weeks, William split his time between taking care of Liam’s patients, working in the lab on Katie’s case, overseeing her treatments, and spending his free time with Liam, willing him to wake up. He knew the longer Liam remained unconscious, the less likely he would ever awaken. There had been no change in Liam’s condition since he had gotten out of surgery. His internal injuries were healing, but his leg still awaited surgery and he wasn’t waking up. That had caused everyone to worry, and none more so than William.

William, dead on his feet, walked into Liam’s room after checking on his friend’s patients. He looked at Liam, hoping for some type of movement, but there was nothing. William took his position in the chair, taking Liam’s hand. Every night it was the same, but he wasn’t going to give up. He was going to do all he could to fight for Liam’s life. He’d fight with his last breath. All he wanted to do was to crawl into bed with Liam and hold him in his arms like he used to do. He’d never slept as well as he did when he and Liam slept together in each other’s embrace. He remembered how they always fell asleep in each other’s arms. They’d wake up the same way in the mornings. He had missed that. How could I have been so stupid? Why did I care what my parent’s thought? For seven years I searched but I felt alone no matter whom I was sleeping with!

“What could it hurt?” William said to no one but himself. He stood up and crawled into bed with Liam. He leaned against the headboard and wrapped his arms around his lost love. He kissed the side of Liam’s face and rested his cheek on the top of Liam’s head. William sighed with contentment and fell into a deep sleep.

William stirred out of his slumber when he kept hearing his name called. He figured it was one of the nurses coming in to check on Liam.

Will is here. God, I’ve missed him. It feels like I’ve been on duty for days. Wait! God, where am I? What’s happened? My head. The car. Will? Why is he here now? I’m in Seattle. Why is he? Oh Katie. Katie. I have to check on her.

“Will?”

William opened his eyes and realized that there was no one in the room. “Just a dream. Nothing but a dream.” William mumbled sleepily.

Then he felt fingers tapping his arm. He looked up groggily and realized he was staring into the deep brown eyes that he had missed -- that he loved so much. He sat up quickly. “Liam! You are awake. Thank God!”

“Will, what happened?”

“You were hit by a car two weeks ago. Do you remember that?”

Liam racked his brain for the memory and everything came to him in a flash. “Yes.”

“Joyce called me and told me what happened. You’ve been in a coma for two weeks. We weren’t sure if you were going to wake up. Thank God you did!”

“Two weeks?”

“Yes, you have some other injuries and need more surgery but you’re awake now!”

“How’s Katie?”

William frowned.

“Will, how’s Katie? Please tell me.”

“God Liam. I’m so sorry. I...It...The cancer spread to her brain. We saw the tumors in the most recent CAT Scan a week ago. We tried everything Liam. Katie died three days ago. I’m so sorry.”

“No, you’re wrong. She was in remission. No. I can’t accept this. You’re wrong! This can’t be happening. I have to go to her!”

“Liam, you are not going anywhere. You just woke up from significant head trauma. Your leg is immobilized until they do surgery to put a rod in it. You couldn’t even make it a foot before you’d pass out. My God Liam, you have a punctured lung and a skull fracture.”

“But I have to see her.”

“I’ll see what I can do Liam, but it won’t be till morning.” William tried to settle Liam back in bed, but he was having none of it.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Liam said angrily as he tried to move away from William’s hands.

“Come on Liam, cooperate with me.”

“Will, what are you doing here? More to the fact, why the hell did I wake up with you in my bed?”

“Liam, I’ve been so worried about you these past two weeks. When I heard a car hit you, I thought I had lost you for good. I just wanted to be close to you again.”

Furious and frightened, Liam glared at William, “You did lose me, seven years ago. Please go. As you can see, I’m awake and I’m fine.”

“Liam, please…”

“Will, please leave and on your way out, could you send the doctor in.”

William looked at Liam, eyes pleading. Dejectedly he turned around and walked out of the room. He ran into Joyce in the hall.

“How’s Liam? Any change.”

“Yes, he’s awake now. I’m going to get his doctor.”

“Oh that’s great news.”

“Yes…yes it is.”

“You don’t look very happy. What’s the matter William?” Joyce looked at her new friend. He saw the worried look on her face. Since the accident, she had become his confidant, someone who would listen to all his fears. Being new in town, he didn’t know anyone. Joyce had never married. She wasn’t a pretty woman, but her heart and soul were truly beautiful. He sought her out often. About four nights after the accident, she had popped into Liam’s room after her shift ended. She saw him asleep in the chair next to the bed, holding Liam’s hand, his head resting on the bed. She told him that she found the scene touchingly intimate. The next night after she had finished work, she told him that he needed a break and insisted they go out for coffee. He poured the entire story out. He told her about their past and why he really came to Seattle.

“He wasn’t too thrilled to find me in his room. He asked about Katie.”

“What did you tell him?”

“What choice did I have? I told him the truth. The stubborn idiot started demanding to go see her. Like he’d make it to the doorway before collapsing – God, I had forgotten how stubborn he could be.

“Come on William, that’s not all.”

“Joyce, he kicked me out. He wanted to know why I was there. I told him that I was worried and thought I’d lost him for good.”

“What did he say?”

“He said that I lost him seven years ago. Joyce, what am I going to do? I don’t think he’s going to give me another chance. Not that I really blame him.” Will was distraught. His face was pale and he kept blinking his eyes to hold back tears.

“Will, give him a few days. I’m sure he was confused and still groggy, on top of the devastating news about Katie. You can’t give up – not if you love him, which I know you do. You just hang there. It will work out, I’m sure of it.”

“You really think so?”

“Yes I do, especially if I have anything to do with it. Now you look exhausted. Go down to the on call room and get some sleep. It won’t do any good to get sick. You need to be in top form.”

William laughed. God he loved this woman. He wished his mother was more like Joyce. “Yes mom.” William saluted the older nurse and headed to the elevators.

Determined, Joyce walked toward Liam’s room. She was going to impart a few facts to the handsome doctor, and she wasn’t leaving until he had the entire story. When she was standing outside of Liam’s room, she saw the doctor exit. She asked him how Liam was. He informed her that he was doing better than he had expected. There seems to be no after effects from the accident, other than the injuries they knew of. He felt that Dr. McAllister would make a full recovery.

“Can I go in and see him?” She asked the doctor.

“Yes you can, but try not to stay too long. He still needs his rest.”

Joyce knocked on the door. She heard Liam tell her to enter.

Liam smiled when he saw Joyce walk through the door. He was glad that is wasn’t Will coming back. He so wasn’t ready for that. He was somewhat shocked to wake up in William’s arms.

“Oh Liam, you don’t know how good it is to see you awake. We were all so worried about you. How are you feeling?”

“I’m feeling okay – just a bit tired and weak.”

“Well it’s to be expected. I ran into William…Dr. Radcliffe just now. He said that he told you about Katie. I’m so sorry Liam. You have to know that we did everything we could. Dr. Radcliffe was here around the clock, trying everything to shrink the tumors. He was with her when she died. I know it’s not much comfort, but you did know what the odds were once her diagnosis was made. She lived longer than she would have because of you. You just have to hold onto the fact that she was happy despite her pain and that is thanks to you.”

“I understand what you are saying Joyce, but it’s still hard. She was so young and had so much to look forward to. She should have had a brighter future.” Tears formed in Liam’s eyes.

Joyce sat down in the chair next to his bed and took his hand. “Listen to me Liam McAllister. You give so much of yourself to your patients. You make their lives so much more hopeful, but you are also honest with them. You tell them if the therapy will hurt. You don’t treat them as just sick patients; you treat them as people. How many times did Katie or one of your other patients thank you for not treating them like a kid? You have an innate ability to comfort. They know you care, that you’ll be there with them, and that gives them the strength to get through all the painful treatments. You have to realize you did all that you could for Katie, as you do with all your patients. They know that and so do their parents. You don’t give them false hope, but they know that you will do everything to help them get well. That is what makes you an exceptional person and a wonderful doctor.”

“Thank you Joyce. You’re a good friend.”

“You’re welcome. Katie wasn’t the only thing I wanted to talk to you about, but if you aren’t feeling up to it, I can come back tomorrow.”

Liam looked at Joyce. “What else did you want to talk about?”

“Dr. Radcliffe.”

“What about him?” Liam asked gruffly.

“We’ve become good friends since your accident. He’s a truly lovely and caring man. I know you aren’t aware of this, but he never left your side except to take care of your patients. He volunteered to take over your caseload. When he wasn’t with the patients or working on Katie’s case, he spent all his time here, in this chair. He refused my suggestions to go back to the apartment and get some rest. He even refused to use the on call room. The morning after your accident, I found him asleep, his head resting on your bed. He told me that he was never leaving you again. He wouldn’t even leave to get fresh clothes. I brought them to him. Didn’t you even notice the cot over there by the wall?”

Liam looked over at the cot on the other side of the room and looked back at Joyce, but didn’t respond. She saw his fingers clench the blanket.

“Look Liam, I know you are a private person. You never discuss your personal life, but it was quite obvious to me that you and Will have a past. A few days after your accident I came in to see how you were doing and found Will in here crying. I realized he needed someone to talk to, and before I knew it, he poured out the entire story.”

Joyce saw Liam stiffen and look away, but she was resolved to say her piece. “He loves you Liam. He never stopped loving you.”

“Well if you know the entire story, then you know he sure picked a great way to show it.” Liam didn’t want to talk about this. “That was a long time ago and I’m over it…him.”

“I don’t think you are, and I think if you look deeply within yourself you’ll realize it too.”

“Joyce, I really don’t want to talk about this. I just want to leave the past in the past and move on.”

“Have you?”

“Have I what?”

“Have you really left it in the past and moved on?”

“Yes…”

“Liam, how long have we been friends?”

“About six years, why?”

“In all the time we’ve been friends, I have never seen you in a serious relationship. Sure you’ve gone out few times with different people, but then when the relationship looks as if it might get serious, you bail. Why is that Liam?”

“It’s because it just wasn’t working out, that’s all.” Liam couldn’t meet Joyce’s gaze. “Besides with my schedule, I just don’t have the time for a relationship.”

“That’s just an excuse Liam. What was your schedule like when you and William were together? You both were in medical school and then you were interning. That’s a much heavier schedule than the one you have now. Yet you found the time back then. Why not now?”

“What do you want me to say Joyce -- that I’m afraid. Okay, fine I am. I was devastated by what William did.”

“I understand that, but you also shut down. You haven’t dealt with it and moved on. You are letting it control you. You thought you had a handle on it, but you were just lying to yourself. Then William shows up in Seattle. I noticed your reactions to him. If you were as over it as you say, then him being here wouldn’t have affected you like it did.”

“He hurt me. How was I supposed to react? He just left with ‘her’ and never came back. He even had the audacity to move his things out when I wasn’t there. I desperately wanted to know what happened. Why didn’t he ever tell me he wanted to see someone else. I would have given him the chance to explain, but he couldn’t even do that. I even would have been willing to discuss what happened to see if we could fix it. But he didn’t think enough of us to try that. So yes, I am still hurt and angry with him. I think I have every right to feel that way.”

“But he’s here now, and it wasn’t only Katie’s case that brought him here. He also came back to you. He never stopped loving you Liam. He knows what he did hurt you terribly, and he’s not proud of what he did or how he handled it.”

“Well bully for him. He comes back seven years later to clear his conscience. Well that’s not my problem.”

“LIAM! What would it hurt to hear him out? If after you listen to what he has to say you still feel the same way, then you will have closure and you will be able to truly move one. You won’t be able to do that until you talk with William. I know that and so do you.”

“I don’t know if I can Joyce. I don’t know if I want to revisit it.”

“You have to and you know it. You’ve been hiding here behind your job and you can’t continue to do that. Just listen to him, Liam. That is all I ask.”

“I’ll think about it, okay? I’m very tired now and want to get some sleep.”

Joyce stood up and squeezed Liam’s hand. “Think about what I said Liam.” She turned off the light as she walked out of his room. Out in the hall, she saw William sitting in a chair, his head in his hands. He looked up when he heard her approach.

“Well how did it go?” he asked hopefully.

“I’m not sure. He did say he’d think about it. Give him some time William. He’s been through a lot recently. Your sudden appearance brought up a lot of painful memories he thought were long buried. He also has to deal with his accident and Katie’s death.”

William sat at a desk at the nurses’ station ostensibly writing on charts. A week had passed and still Liam refused to see him. The only people he would let in his room were the doctors, nurses, and Joyce. He had the surgery to put the pins in his leg three days ago. Will was beginning to conclude that Liam wasn’t going to talk to him. He couldn’t blame him after what he had done, but he had hoped. I should have never come. Should have just left Liam in peace. How selfish I have been – again.

He was startled out of his musings when he heard Joyce call his name. When he looked up he saw her smiling.

“How is he?”

“He’s fine. They have him up and walking. He’ll be starting physical therapy in the next day or so.”

“Oh, that’s great news. What about…?”

“Yes, William. He’s ready to talk to you.”

“Finally! I’ve been waiting for so long.”

“Just remember William, you may not get the response you are hoping for. You may say all that you have been wanting to, but just be ready. If he’s not willing, then you are going to have to accept that and respect his decision. Are you sure you can do that? Just because you came back now and want to try again, doesn’t mean that he’ll be willing to do that.”

“I understand and yes, I’ll accept whatever decision he makes. But at least he’s willing to talk to me. That’s what I’ve been wanting.”

“I just wanted to make sure you understood. Go on in, he’s waiting for you.”

“Did you talk to his doctor? I really don’t want to have this conversation here, besides I think a spot of fresh air would do him good.”

“Yes, he thought it was a good idea to get Liam out. There’s a wheelchair in his room and you can take him up to the atrium and the roof garden.”

Joyce watched William walk to Liam’s room. She saw him pause outside the closed door, take a deep breath and open the door. Joyce went back to work. She had done all that she could. She just hoped it was enough, whatever the outcome may be.

Liam was sitting in his wheelchair looking out the window when he heard the door open. His hands were shaking with nervousness as he used them to turn the chair around to face William. Liam held his breath and stared at him. He noticed that Will had a bag with him, but he ignored it. He didn’t know what to say, so he opted to say nothing. Will was the one that wanted the conversation, so he’d let him initiate it.

William watched Liam turn the chair around. He hitched his breath as he got a look at Liam for the first time in a week. “Thank you for seeing me, Liam. It’s so great to see you out of the bed. I heard that your surgery went well and that you’ll be starting physical therapy in the next day or so.”

“Yes, I was lucky, or at least that’s what people keep telling me.” He paused, struggling to be calm. “So can we get this over with?” He saw William flinch at his brusque words.

“I talked to your doctor and he said that it would be okay to take you up to the rooftop garden. Let you breathe something other than recycled air. It’s a beautiful day outside. Is that okay with you?”

“Yea, whatever.” He could see that Will was nervous, but he just didn’t feel like making this easy for him. It might be petty of him, but dammit he was the injured party here.

William walked behind the wheelchair and directed Liam towards the door. He hit the button on the wall to open the door automatically and wheeled Liam to the elevators.

They rode upstairs in silence, each lost in their own thoughts; each attempting to hide their fear about what was to come – something that been seven years in the making.

William pushed Liam out into the garden area. There were a few other patients sitting out enjoying the sunny day. Liam pointed out a spot away from the others. He didn’t want to have this discussion in an area where others could see and hear it. William took Liam over to where he had indicated. There was a bench hidden behind some small trees against the stone wall. It was private and away from the other patients.

William pushed the chair until it was in front of the bench, he bent down and locked the wheels. With the chair secured, he took a seat on the bench across from Liam.

“Before anything, I want to tell you how truly sorry I am that we couldn’t save Katie. I know how much she meant to you.”

“Thank you. She was really a special little girl. I wish we could have done more for her, but some things are just out of our hands.” Liam paused and his entire body tensed. He spoke without looking at William. “So shall we get to the real reason you wanted to talk to me?”

“There is so much I want to say to you…” William started, “…but I don’t quite know where to start.” Liam looked up at William as he nervously played with the straps of the bag he brought with him.

“Why don’t you start with the real reason you came out to Seattle.”

“Okay. I did come out to help with Katie, hoping I that one of the innovative treatments I’ve been working on in New York would help her. I knew you were in Seattle and that you were in charge of her case. I saw it as an opportunity to help a suffering child and also an opportunity it see you again. I was hoping that enough time had passed for you to… Then I got here and saw your reaction. I had debated whether or not to let you know ahead of time that I was coming, but in the end I decided not to. To be honest I wasn’t sure you’d be receptive to my coming out here, although I knew that you would put Katie above yourself. You were always like that. It’s one of the things that I loved about you – your selflessness.”

Liam flinched when Will said, “loved.” Getting himself under control he spoke softly. “Well it would have been nice to have had a warning. I was stunned when I walked into Dr. Giles’ office and realized who the specialist was. I hope you can understand my less than welcoming reaction. Did you honestly think that I would have greeted you with open arms after what you did? I know it was seven years ago, but dammit Will, you hurt me – no one has ever hurt me like you did.

“I know that, and I’m truly sorry. I have to live with what I did to you every day. I don’t expect you to ever forgive me. How can I, when I can’t even forgive myself? There’s more I want to say, but I don’t know how or if you even want to hear it.”

“Well I do have a few questions.”

“Okay, ask away.”

“The main thing that I’ve been trying to understand is why? Why did you do it, Will. Didn’t you love me? Wasn’t I enough?”

“Oh God, Liam. I loved you so much. If there is one thing that you should never doubt, it’s the depth of my feelings for you.”

“Then why? I just don’t understand. You don’t do that to someone you love.”

“I know you don’t understand, and that’s my fault. I should have come to you and discussed it with you. When I met you, I thought you were the nicest person I had ever met. I loved that we had become friends. You were truly the best friend I ever had. Then I realized that I was becoming attracted to you. I had never been attracted to man before. The revelation was unsettling and frightening. Sure, growing up I never had a lot of girlfriends – I was a bit of a nerd, but never in my wildest dreams did I think I was gay. You on the other hand had been “out” since when? 16?” Liam nodded. “You were so comfortable with who you were and your family was wonderful. They fully accepted you and your lifestyle. My parents never would have accepted it. In the beginning I just didn’t want the added pressure of my family on our new relationship. So do you understand why I wanted to keep us quiet?”

“I do understand that Will. I told you then that I would wait as long as you needed. I never pushed you about making us public to your family did I?”

“No, you didn’t. But as it got closer to the end of our internship, the more pressure I was getting from my parents. They wanted me to come back to New York for my residency. In my family you are expected to tow the line, which is what I always did. My father had always wanted me to continue the family tradition of medicine. I went along with it although it wasn’t what I wanted to do – I’m not sure if I told you that?”

“No you didn’t. I had no idea. What did you want to do?”

“I wanted to be a writer, but my father wanted no part of that. If I wanted his support, it had to be pre-med and then med school. I not, then I would have to make it on my own. He wasn’t thrilled with my going to UCSF, but he accepted it. Everyone in my family went to Harvard. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a doctor and I wouldn’t change it.”

“That’s all fine and good Will. If you had told me, then we could have put in for residencies in New York. I would have be more than willing to move to the East Coast or anywhere else, just so long as we were together. But you never gave me the choice.”

“I know. I was also getting pressure from my parents about why I never brought any girlfriends home. So I went to Dru and asked her for a favor. Remember when my parents came to visit a few months before we moved in together?” Liam nodded, not liking where this was going. “Well I introduced Dru to my family as my girlfriend. I just wanted to pacify them. She was a good sport about it. Well after that, it escalated. My parents would call and want to speak with my “girlfriend.” So I would go over to her apartment and we’d all talk on the phone. They thought I was living with her. After a while, I did become attracted to her. I still loved you, but I was confused. I mean, how could I be love in with you and yet be attracted to Dru? I would have understood it better if it had been another man, but it wasn’t. I acted on that attraction, Liam. It was the worse decision I ever made. Then you walked in that night and found us together. I saw the look on your face. I knew what I had done to you. I wanted to talk to you, but I didn’t know what to say. I mean, what could I have said that would have not hurt you? Then you asked us to leave.”

“You must understand why I did that? I was shocked. I had no idea Will. I never suspected anything. I felt betrayed. I couldn’t get my mind around what I had just seen, and in our bed. I think that is what hurt me the most.”

“I know Liam. I know. Dru was becoming more demanding about seeing me. She stopped by the apartment. She had not done that before. We drank a lot of wine and…we fell asleep. I never meant for that to happen. I know I was still cheating Liam, but Dru and I had never been in our bed before, I swear. I had every intention of coming back to talk to you. To find out if we could work through it and if you could ever forgive me. But in the end, I couldn’t. I was ashamed and afraid of what your answer would be. So I took the easy way out. I packed up and left. I headed directly back to New York.”

“Did Dru go with you?”

“No she didn’t. I asked her, but she didn’t want to leave San Francisco. I think she realized by my reaction that you still were important to me. When I got to New York, I just told my parents we broke up and I needed a change in scenery.”

“I was so worried about you, Will. I had no idea what had happened to you or where you went. Dru wouldn’t tell me anything. After I didn’t hear from you for a while, I figured that was it. I was never going to see or hear from you.”

“There were so many times when I picked up the phone and dialed your number, but I would hang up after it started ringing. I wanted to talk to you so badly – I wanted to hear your voice, but I was afraid. So I wrote you -- I wrote you so many letters.”

“I never received them.”

William reached into the bag sitting next to him. Liam watched him as he pulled out three stacks of envelopes. He placed them in Liam’s lap. “I know; I never mailed them.” Liam looked at the letters, then back up at Will. Will sat with his head down, staring at his hands. Liam looked back at the stack in his lap. He picked them up and recognized the neat handwriting on them.

“Why didn’t you mail them?”

“I was too afraid they would be mailed back to me Return to Sender. I tucked them away in the back of my closet and tried to get on with my life. I finished my residency. I dated – both men and women, but it never worked out. After a while I figured out why -- my heart was still committed elsewhere. There was no one else I wanted to be with. So when I found out you needed help, I told my parents, packed my backs and came out here.”

Liam look confusedly at William, “Told your parents what?”

“I told them everything – you, me, and the real reason I was coming to Seattle. I told them that hopefully I wasn’t coming back and that I wanted to spend my life with you.”

“Oh…” Liam didn’t know what else to say.

“They didn’t take it well. I knew they wouldn’t, but for once I decided to stand up to my father. I don’t know why I thought that if I waited it would be easier or that he would be more accepting. He has basically disowned me, but I don’t care anymore. I should have told them sooner, then maybe this never would have happened.”

“I’m so sorry Will. I truly mean that.”

“I know. I just wish that I had come to my senses sooner. I regret what I did to you with my whole being. I wish I could take it back, but I can’t. I only wish that someday you could find it in your heart to forgive me. I was wrong to come here with the idea that I could get you back. I realize that now. I just wanted to give you the explanation that you deserved all those years ago.” As William finished speaking, tears spilled down his cheeks.

Liam reached out to take William’s hands in his. “I wish you had told me all of this before it got so out of control. I knew that I was your first, but if you had confided in me, you wouldn’t have had to make decisions alone. We could have talked about it. I had no idea of the pressure your family was putting on you. I was your friend and you shut me out, Will. You didn’t give me a chance. I thought it was me – that I had done something to make you stop loving me.”

“Oh God, no Liam. It was never you! I’m so sorry you thought that for all these years. I never thought that you would think it was something you did.”

Liam was exhausted. The intensity of his emotions terrified him. He had kept them under wraps for a long time. He felt out of control, so he put his feelings away. He put on his reserved physician persona. “So what are you going to do now?” Liam asked William, matter of factly.

“I don’t know. Dr. Giles has offered me a position on the staff. Maybe I’ll find a position somewhere else. I don’t want to make you anymore uncomfortable that I already have. But, Liam would you mind if I accepted the position? It would be in the Oncology Department. We would see each other professionally occasionally.”

“If you want the position, then you should take it.”

“You wouldn’t mind?”

“I’ll be honest, it will, but no I wouldn’t mind. You are an excellent doctor Will. The patients here would benefit from your expertise.”

William smiled for the first time since they had started talking. “I’m not sure I’d be as accommodating as you are being.”

“Well, you always did have me wrapped around your finger, and you know that. But I think it’s time for you to do what you want to do and what is in your best interest.”

“If I did that, then I’d be begging you to forgive me and give us a second chance.”

“I’m can’t do that right now. I’m not sure I ever can.”

“I understand. It’s an awful lot to ask someone to forgive. I guess I’d be the same way, but I have to say this since I’m being so honest. I still love you. I never stopped loving you. I don’t expect you to ever forget what I did to you. That would be asking too much, but do you think we could ever try again?”

“I don’t know Will. I loved you more than I ever loved anyone else. I haven’t felt that way since. I guess you can say that I’m not so good in the trust department anymore, and I don’t give my heart away anymore. I save that for my work and the kids.”

“Okay, Liam. You deserve to be happy and I wish I could be the one to make you feel that way again. But I’m glad we’ve finally had a chance to talk.”

“I am too. Liam reached down for the letters to hand them back. William shook his head, “No you keep them. They are yours. Read them or throw them away, whatever you want.” Liam looked intently at Will for a moment and then down at the letters. “Thanks.” Liam said quietly without raising his head.

William looked at his watch. “I’d better get you back up to your room, or they’ll think you’ve been kidnapped.” Liam laughed for the first time since William made had arrived. While he was still hurt by what William had done, he had a better understanding of the entire situation. He wasn’t ready to forgive or forget. He didn’t think he’d ever be able to forget what had happened.

William got Liam back to his room and settled in bed. He turned to leave, when Liam asked him a question. “Where are you staying?”

“Well I’ve been pretty much staying in the on call room since you woke up. I haven’t had a chance to find an apartment. Why?”

“I was thinking that since I’m going to be here for a few more weeks, you might as well stay at my apartment while you settle into your new position and look for a place. That way you can take your time and not accept the first place you find.”

“You wouldn’t mind? I’d never ask you for that.”

“I know you wouldn’t, that is why I offered. It just makes the most sense.”

“Then I accept your kind offer kind sir.” William bowed formally and winked at Liam. Liam laughed out loud at his antics. God, how I’ve missed this part of William. He could always make me laugh.

“Out with you now. I need to get some rest. I’m exhausted.” Liam was still chuckling. He couldn’t remember when he had laughed so carelessly, but he did remember. It was before William left.

Once William left the room, Liam found he couldn’t sleep. He kept replaying their earlier conversation. He knew he was only kidding himself all these years. He had missed Will – he stilled loved him – he didn’t think he’d ever stop loving him. The reason why his other relationships never worked out was because his heart just wasn’t in it. It still belonged to another and would always belong to another. So he had a choice to make – live the rest of his life alone and without love or take a chance on Will again. He didn’t know what to do. Should I take a chance like Joyce suggested? Do I dare try to put my heart out there again? Would I survive if he left again? So many questions and doubts. A lot of his patients were cancer patients, so he would be working with William a lot.

~Part: 4~

Liam started his physical therapy a few days later. Whenever he could, William was there to take him. If he was busy, he would be there when the therapy ended. He’d wheel Liam to visit his patients and the two of them would often have the children laughing. The nurses loved to see them coming. They knew the kids would be entertained and for a while could forget how sick they were. Joyce watched them hopefully. Perhaps they will become close again. Liam is healing quickly because of William’s attention. I know William wants more, but I think his efforts are slowly paying off. Liam is letting his guard down. He depends on Will not only as a colleague but also as a friend. Will should just be patient a while longer.

Soon the young men were spending almost all their time together. William would pop into Liam’s room at different times during the day to see how he was and if he needed anything. He’d talk with Liam about his patients. Together they would decide on the treatment plan. William would stay long after his shift was over just sitting with Liam, talking, watching TV. Joyce would sometimes find the two of them dozing; Liam in bed, Will in the chair next to him. It wasn’t long before they fell into the easy friendship they had started with all those years ago. Liam knew that William still held onto the hope that they would get together again; that all would be forgiven. But Liam wasn’t willing to go that far yet. He was satisfied right now with the friendship they were developing. Liam had not had any serious relationships since Will left, nor did he have any other close friendships, other than Joyce, but she was more like a mother to him than anything else. He was friendly but distant, except with the children.

A couple of weeks later, it was time for Liam to be discharged from the hospital. William was there to take him home and get him settled back in his apartment. He was out of the wheelchair, but he had to use a cane to help him get around. William directed Liam back to his bedroom, but Liam didn’t want to go there.

“Please Will, just let me sit on the couch. I’m tired of beds.”

“Okay, but just let me know if you need anything.”

“I will.” He was tired already. He sat on the couch and grabbed the TV remote and turned it on.

Will came back from putting Liam’s bags in his room. “You hungry? I’m still not much of a cook, but I can order some take-out for you?”

“Great, I’m starving. How about some Chinese from the restaurant down the street?”

“Sounds good. What do you want?” William pulled the menu out of the drawer and picked up the phone.

“I don’t’ know. You know what I like. Just order me whatever.” Liam turned his attention back to the TV. William was stunned. That was the first time Liam had made any comment about their prior relationship. William smiled happily as he placed their dinner order. When he hung up, he came into the living room and sat down on the couch next to Liam.

“It’ll be about 45 minutes. You need anything?”

“No I’m fine. I just want to sit here and enjoy being home and out of a hospital bed. By the way, I meant to ask you earlier, have you found an apartment yet?”

Will’s heart stopped. He had hoped he could continue living here, especially now that Liam was home. “Uh, no, I haven’t had much luck. I want something in the city and close to the hospital, but there isn’t much to be found right now. I’m on a few waiting lists. It will take a couple of months before something is available. Why? I was planning on moving to a hotel once you were settled.”

“There’s no need for that. It’s just a waste of money, plus since I’m not a hundred percent, I think I’d be more comfortable having someone around. I mean, I don’t need a baby sitter, but I’d feel a bit more secure if you would stay till you found a place. I have the room. What do you say?”

Smiling happily William responded, “I’d say you have yourself a temporary roommate.”

It didn’t take long for them to fall into a routine. They arranged Liam’s therapy sessions around William’s schedule so that he could take Liam up to the hospital. He might have to see a patient or have to revise a treatment protocol and Liam would wait, wheeling himself to his patients’ rooms. The staff were amazed. The children seemed to gain hope from seeing Liam in his chair. Children who were lethargic brightened when he was around. They would come home and spend time together doing nothing; talking and doing what friends do. After a few weeks, Liam was ready to return to work. Whenever their schedules permitted, they found themselves hanging out together in the doctors’ lounge, eating lunch together. Soon they were going to the movies and spending all their free time together.

Liam was obviously happy with the way things were going, but William was becoming frustrated. They had not talked about a closer relationship. William wanted more. He talked to Joyce about his concern.

“He seems glad to have me living there, but there’s still a barrier. It’s as if we never had a history.”

“Will. You have to give it time. You were apart for seven years. Liam mourned all that time. He built walls around his heart. It will take awhile for him to be willing to risk anything else but friendship. You are wearing him down. He looks for you. He depends on you. I never saw Liam depend on anyone. He’s afraid to be hurt again.”

“I know Joyce. I know. I believe that he has feelings for me, but he is in denial. What if I gave a little push?

“What do you mean?” Joyce asked worriedly. “I won’t allow you to hurt him William, especially now that he is beginning to trust again.”

“Joyce, I’d never hurt him again, I swear. But I have to get him to admit what he really feels.”

“What do you want to do?” William told Joyce his plan. Although she was concerned, she agreed that Liam was still protecting himself, afraid to trust his feelings. She had seen Liam look at William lovingly and then suddenly paste his mask back on. She agreed to help.

One night Liam had to wait for William after their shift at the hospital. He stiffened when he saw William laughing with a couple of nurses. He’d watch as the younger nurses would flirt with William, but this was the first time that he seemed to be responding. When they got into the apartment, William said he needed to shower and immediately left the living room. Liam asked him what he wanted for dinner. Did he want to go out or order in and watch a movie?

“Could we make it for another time?”

“Why?” Liam asked afraid of the answer.

“Well, Maria Alvarez has three tickets to a Disco Biscuits concert. One of her friends can’t go and she asked me. She knew I liked the band and had been to several concerts back east. They’re from Philadelphia. They all went to the University of Pennsylvania and play in the area often. You remember my brother is on the staff at CHUP.” William spoke in a rush.

“Oh.” Liam was disappointed. He just made the assumption that they would spend the evening together. “Three of you are going?” Liam was trying to be nonchalant about it.

“Yes, Maria and one of her friends.” William spoke over his shoulder as he walked into his bedroom. “How about we go that new restaurant you wanted to try tomorrow night?” He could sense Liam’s tension and felt guilty about his ruse, but he needed to shock Liam; get him to face his feelings. He needed to know if there was a chance that they could be together. If not… “Do you need me to do something before I leave?”

“No, I don’t. Well have a good time.” Liam limped down to hall and shut his bedroom door forcefully.

William watched Liam disappear into his room. He knew his friend was upset that he was going out without him and with at least one woman. Maybe this will force him to admit how he really feels. God, I hope this works. I need him in my life, in my bed. An hour later he knocked on Liam’s door and opened it. Liam was lying on his bed.

“I just wanted to let you know that I’m leaving now. I wanted to see if you needed anything before I leave.”

“No, I’m fine. Just be quiet when you get home -- if you come home.” He whispered the last part.

Will’s heart thumped in his chest but he pretended not to have heard the last comment. “Okay. Well I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Around 1:00 am, Liam heard William come home. He listened as William walked down the hall. He heard William stop at his door, so he turned on his side with this back to the door, pretending to be asleep. He heard William open the door, and he held himself rigidly. No need for him to think I was waiting up for him. He’s an adult. He can see whomever he wants. Makes no difference to me. After about a minute he heard his door being closed and heard William close his bedroom door.

The next morning Liam was up first. He was grumbling as he made his way around the apartment, picking up William’s jacket from the sofa and hanging it in the closet; putting his shoes outside his bedroom door. About a half hour later, William came into the kitchen in just a pair of blue silk boxers. Liam watched him as he got himself a cup of coffee.

“Good morning Liam.” When Liam didn’t answer him, he joined him at the table. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” William noted the brusque tone in his voice.

“You sure?”

“I said I was fine.”

“So are you going to ask me how the concert was? It was great by the way. I think they are going to be another cult band, like The Grateful Dead and Phish.”

Liam still didn’t look up from the newspaper he was pretending to read. “Why? It’s none of my business what you do in your free time.”

“What is wrong with you this morning? You are acting like something crawled up your ass.”

“Nothing’s wrong with me. Just because I don’t care to hear about your date…ah, your concert, you think something is wrong with me.” But something was wrong with him and he knew what it was. It took him a while to identify it. He was up all night thinking about it, and he came to the conclusion that he was jealous that William had gone out without him, even if it was with two women and not really a date. He didn’t like this feeling. When had it happened, he wasn’t sure. He didn’t want to think about it.

William heard what Liam said and tried to cover up, but he pretended not to have noticed. “Well fine – be like that. I was going to ask you to come with me to Pike’s Market but not if you are going to be in a bad mood.” William headed down the hall and went into his bedroom. He came out 15 minutes later in a pair of form-fitting jeans, a white t-shirt and his black leather jacket.

Liam took at the vision before him. God. He looks…damn him. “Are you going to go alone? Perhaps you could call your friends from last night?” Liam asked, trying to sound like he really didn’t care, but managing to sound petulant. He didn’t like the way he was feeling. He didn’t want Will to think he was jealous.

“I didn’t plan to. I thought you would be going with me, but maybe I will. I’m not like you Liam, I don’t like doing things alone. You sure you won’t change your mind?” Even though William was trying to jar Liam into admitting he felt more than just friendship for him, he hated this. It was too much like when he was sneaking around with Dru.

“No thanks. I have to work on my part of that article for Pediatrics.” Liam finally looked up from the newspaper. William saw the hurt in his friend’s eyes and his heart lurched. He couldn’t go through with this. “Look I’ll stay and work on our article. I can go to the market anytime.”

“No, go ahead. Unlike you I like being alone.” Liam almost snarled as he got up from the table and turned to leave the kitchen.

“Liam, quit being such a brat. It’s not very attractive on you. You’re jealous because I went out without you. You can deny it all you want, but if you didn’t care, you wouldn’t be in such a snit this morning.”

“Jealous – Me? Get a grip Will. Who you date or sleep with is not my concern and I could care less.” Damn. He always could push my buttons. I have to stay in control. I can’t let him hurt me again. Liam turned around and stormed to his bedroom. He slammed his door shut.

William shook his head, grabbed his wallet and left the apartment, slamming the door on his way out.

Liam heard the door slam shut as William left. He lay on his bed wondering what was wrong with him. Am I jealous? God, I can’t let him in again. He is still vacillating. I’ve seen him flirting with the nurses. I can’t open my heart and then find him in bed with another woman or man for that matter. I can’t care anymore. I have to tell him to move out. I have to get him out of my life.

Liam knew he was being unfair. He had only offered William friendship. It was enough for him right now, but William obviously needed more. William was a passionate man.

Old memories tried to crash into his thoughts -- nights in front of the fireplace; sex under the shower in the morning. No! Stop! I can’t think of this. Liam banished the memories from his mind and regained control.

William could go out with whomever he wanted. He could too, but he knew he didn’t want to. He started wondering if he made the right decision in suggesting that Will stay here while he recovered. He was fine now, but he still hadn’t ask William to leave. Will didn’t offer either. They just fell into a routine and he had to admit that he was enjoying having Will around again. He didn’t mind living alone, but he liked living with William more. He acted like a jealous boyfriend earlier and he didn’t like that. He came to the realization that he had slowly let William back into his life. Besides work, he was spending all his time with Will and was enjoying the things they did together. He showed him around Seattle – took him to all the sights – Pike Street Market, Pioneer Square, the waterfront, and the Space Needle. They would spend hours at the market, walking around and looking at all the wares. Strolling along the waterfront, getting coffee and sitting at Myrtle Edwards Park – just enjoying each others company.

Meanwhile, at a diner a few blocks away, William was meeting Joyce for a late breakfast. He told her about Liam’s reaction about the concert. He told her about their conversation this morning. He revealed his fear that he was hurting Liam too much; that his plan wasn’t working. He worried that he was only pushing Liam farther away.

Joyce was beginning to worry as well. “What do you want to do William? You’ve confronted him and he refused to admit anything. Liam has closed himself off to personal relationships for a long time. Maybe you’re right. Maybe Liam has retreated further into his inner sanctum of protective indifference. Maybe you will never be able to force him out of it. I know you belong together, but it may not be the right time. I honestly thought he’d realize how much he wanted to be with you.”

William stood up. “I’ve got to get away Joyce. I’m going to drive up to Snoqualmie Falls. Walk in the woods. Think things out.”

“Promise me you won’t just leave without telling him.” Joyce demanded.

“I would never do that again Joyce. I promise you.”

Will kissed Joyce’s cheek and walked away. The nurse sat over her coffee for a long time. She cared so much about these two young men.

Will drove up to Snoqualmie Falls and spent the day walking the trails. Instead of finding peace, his anger grew. He drove back to the city late in the afternoon, but he didn’t go to the apartment. He sat in a darkened movie theatre unaware of what was on the screen, his anger festering. Finally he left the theatre and returned to the apartment. I’ve had it. No more kid gloves. I’ll tell him what I want. I’ll tell him what he needs. I’ll tell him he’s a stubborn ass. If he still denies his feelings, I’ll pack my bags and leave right in front of him. His anger burned into a resolute fury. He stormed into the building, stalked to the elevator and punched the button. Fuming, he fumbled with his key in the door. He slammed the door open ready to battle for his life’s happiness and stopped when he saw what lay before him.

“Liam…Liam!” When he didn’t receive an answer from the figure lying on the living room floor. Next to him was an overturned box. Scattered around him were pictures, drawings, and the letters that William had given to him. Some of the envelopes were open, their contents spilled on the floor. The others were stacked in front of the fireplace. He noticed some paper in the fireplace that hadn’t burned yet.

Bending down next to Liam, he saw his tear streaked face. He shook Liam, trying to wake him. Liam wasn’t moving. William shook Liam harder, but he didn’t stir. He looked around and saw a half empty bottle of wine on the coffee table along with the bottle of pain pills.

“Oh God!!” William reached for the bottle of pills and checked the contents. The bottle was mostly full. “Thank God! Liam what did you think you were doing?” He yelled at the unconscious man. William shook Liam again and slapped his face a few more times. He was still getting no reaction. He was really worried now. He didn’t know how many pills Liam had taken.

Picking Liam up off the floor, he struggled down the hall into the master bathroom. While holding him up against the wall, William reached in and turned the shower on as cold as he could get it. He then took Liam in his arms and dragged him into the shower and shoved him underneath the cold water. “Come on Liam, wake up dammit. You are not leaving me now. Come on, wake up!” He slapped him a few more times on the face. That seemed to do it. There was some movement from Liam and he started gasping and coughing.

Groggily Liam shook his head to try and clear the water from his eyes, complaining about the cold water. Finally he noticed William in the shower with him. Still not alert enough to understand what was going on, he looked at William. “Will, you came back; you didn’t leave me.”

“Of course I came back you stupid git. I just went out to breakfast with Joyce and took a drive up to Snoqualmie Falls. If you hadn’t gotten so pissy this morning…”

“Why are we in the shower with all our clothes on? The water is too cold. Make it warm Will.” Liam closed his eyes again and slumped against William.

William shook Liam again and put his head back underneath the water. “Come Liam. Open your eyes. Stay with me here. If you open your eyes, I’ll make the water warm. Come on…” Liam opened his eyes. “That’s good Liam, now keep them open. Stay with me here. Talk to me.”

“Talk in the shower, now why would you want to do that Will? I’m tired. I want to go to sleep. Please let me sleep.”

“No, you have to stay awake.” He slapped Liam’s cheek again. “Liam, what did you think you were doing? Please tell me you weren’t trying to kill yourself?”

“Kill myself? No. My leg was hurting, so I took a couple of pain pills. It hurt too much to get up, so I just drank them down with the wine that I had been drinking.”

Seeing that Liam was more alert, he reached for the faucets and turned the shower off. “You shouldn’t have been drinking alcohol anyway.” He lugged Liam out of the shower and stripped off his wet clothes. When all his clothes were removed, he put the lid of the toilet down and sat Liam on it.

Looking at William with glassy eyes, he started giggling.

“What are you laughing at?”

“You, you’re all wet. Why are you all wet Will?”

“Because I was in the shower with you, trying to get you to wake up.” William took off his own wet clothes and wrapped one of the fluffy towels around his waist. He grabbed the other towel and wrapped it around Liam.

“Mmmmmm, soft.”

“Yes it is. Now come on, up with you. Let’s get you dried off and in bed.” William pulled Liam into the bedroom. He laid him on the bed and began to dry him.

“Liam, would you answer a question for me?”

“Mmmmmm, what?”

“What were you doing with all those pictures and drawings?”

“I was sad. You were leaving me again. I didn’t want any more memories of us, so I decided to burn them up in the fireplace.”

“I already told you, I wasn’t leaving you. Why didn’t you want to keep them? You didn’t throw them out before?” William continued moving the towel up and down Liam’s back and legs, drying him off.”

“Mmmmmm, that feels good. Don’t stop.”

“Come on, turn over so I dry the rest of you.” William helped Liam roll over to his back. Once he was dry, he went over to the dresser and pulled out a pair of sweats. As he was walking back over to the bed, he saw that Liam had curled up on his side into a tight little ball. As he got closer, he noticed that Liam’s shoulders were shaking and he could hear quiet sobs coming from the figure on the bed.

William sat on the bed and started running his fingers up and down Liam’s spine trying to console him. “Liam….what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

“You don’t love me anymore. You don’t want me and it’s all my fault.”

“What are you talking about? Why would you think that?” He got Liam uncurled and drew the sweats up his legs.

“You said you were going out with friends last night, but I know you had a date. Who did you have a date with? It was one of the nurses at the hospital, wasn’t it? Was it Cordy? I see the way she looks at you? She’s very pretty. Or was it one of the other doctors? I’ve seen how they look at you too – especially Dr. Harris.”

“Liam, look at me.” When Liam refused, William took his chin and forced him to look into his eyes. “I didn’t have a date last night. I went to a concert with Maria and her cousin – who happens to be a priest. He’s a young guy and he likes the group we saw. Afterwards we went out to a late dinner and had some drinks.”

Liam pouted. William thought he looked absolutely adorable in this drunken stupor. “But you didn’t ask me to go. You don’t like me anymore. You don’t want to be with me anymore.” Liam whined childishly and tried to move away from William.

“Liam, would you have gone if I asked you?”

“No, but why couldn’t just the two of us go out?”

“Why wouldn’t you have gone if I asked? We used to go to concerts in San Francisco. I know you like Maria.”

“I do, but…”

“But what?”

“I don’t want to share you. I want you all for myself. That way you won’t like anyone else and won’t leave me again.”

“Liam, I’m not a piece of furniture you can keep locked away.”

“I know that. I’m not stupid. In my head I know that, but my heart says differently.”

William smiled. This conversation was starting to get interesting now. He was glad that he came back.

“Liam, that’s just the alcohol talking. Don’t remember our earlier conversation before you got out of the hospital?”

“No it’s not the alcohol. I’m in control of my faculties and yes I remember that conversation.” Liam responded huffily.

William had to hide a smile. “Well then what’s changed?”

“Me, I have.”

“Come again?”

“Well after you left this morning, I was so mad at you. I noticed the box sticking out of the closet so I dragged it out into the living room and then went and got the wine. As I went through the pictures and drawings, I started reading those letters you gave me. That made me even more angry and sad. So I started tearing them up and throwing them into the fireplace. I decided that since you were gone again, I wasn’t going to go through what I did before. So I came to that decision that I would remove you from my life and heart once and for all. But it wasn’t working. That’s when I figured out that you were embedded so deeply in my heart that there was no getting rid of you. That just made me sadder. I had ruined it. I really liked having you around, and I didn’t want to be alone anymore. But I figured this out too late. It’s okay, Will. Really it is. I know you can’t wait around forever for me to make up my mind and now that I have, it’s too late. I finally realized today that I still love you and I want to try again, but I’ve ruined it.”

William was surprised by Liam’s drunken confession and hoped that when he was sober he wouldn’t regret what he said. “Liam…”

“No it’s alright William. I’ll be okay.”

William knew that in the state Liam was in, he wouldn’t listen to anything he had to say, so he did the only thing he could think of to get through to this stubborn man. “Liam…”

“Mmmmmm…I’m sleepy, can I go to sleep now?”

“No you can’t. Not right now.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m not finished talking to you. I want to explain something to you.”

“What? The reason you are leaving me. At least you are telling me this time and not just disappearing.”

William was getting increasingly frustrated. He couldn’t seem to get through to this stubborn man. “I’ve told you, I’m not leaving you. How many times do I have to tell you that? Look, I left earlier today, but I came back didn’t I?”

“Yes, but all your stuff is here.”

William sighed. “For the last time, Liam. I’m not leaving. I’m not going anywhere. You happen to be stuck with me. Do you understand that?”

“For how long?”

“For however long you want me.”

“What if I said I wanted you forever?”

“Well then I’d be here forever.”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why would you stay if I asked?”

“Because I love you.”

“No you don’t. You’re just saying that that placate me.”

“No I’m not. Liam, you are the only man…the only person I have ever loved. I will never love anyone like I love you.”

Looking at Liam, William didn’t think that what he was saying was sinking in. “God help me…” Taking Liam’s face in his hands, William leaned forwards and placed his lips gently against Liam’s. When Liam didn’t fight the contact, he ran his tongue along Liam’s lips, parting them. When Liam’s mouth opened, he deepened the kiss. He ran his tongue along Liam’s teeth and then along the roof of his mouth. Liam moaned and brought his hands up to the back of William’s head, trying to pull him closer. They kissed like that until they both had to come up for air. William sat up and watched Liam, who was breathing heavily. He watched as Liam brought his hand up to his mouth and touched his own lips.

“Have I convinced you yet? Have I finally gotten through to you that I love you and I will not under any circumstances leave you again, no matter what you try and do to push me away. You are stuck with me.” He grinned as he watched a smile start at the corners of Liam’s mouth. Although he was still under the influence of the pills and wine, comprehension was finally dawning in Liam’s eyes.

William got up off the bed and headed for the door. Liam propped himself up on his elbows and watched him. “Where are you going?”

“I’m going to get you some water and some aspirin.”

“No, don’t go. Stay with me please. I don’t want to be alone. I’m so tired of being alone. Please….”

William watched as he saw Liam scoot to the other side of the bed. Shyly he looked down at the spot he just left. William smiled and walked back to the bed. He lay down facing Liam. As William got settled, Liam reached down to the end of the bed and pulled the quilt up to cover them. He turned over to his other side and nestled his back up against William’s chest. He pulled William’s arm across his body and held it closely to chest and fell asleep happy and content for the first time in seven years.

William knew that Liam has fallen asleep. His mind was awhirl with what had just happened. He was so happy right now, but he was also worried about what Liam’s reaction would be when he woke up. Was it just the alcohol talking? Will the walls be back up once he’s sober? Well even if it happens, I know the truth now and I’ll get through to him somehow. With that thought, William kissed Liam’s shoulder and closed his eyes, happy to be holding the man he loved in his arms once again.

Liam woke a few hours later. Looking out the bedroom window, he saw that the moon’s light spilled across Puget Sound. It was a beautiful sight. The black sky was pierced with glittering stars. He snuggled underneath the quilt since it was chilly in the room, and bumped up against something hard and warm. He wracked his brain trying to remember. It came in flashes – this morning in the kitchen with William, him storming to his room and William leaving the apartment. He remembered pulling out the box of pictures and drawings; he also remembered pulling out the letters that William had given him. As the images continued to flash through his mind he rolled over and gazed at William sleeping peacefully. He tried to sit up, but his head was pounding. What the hell was I thinking taking those pain pills when I had polished off a half of bottle of wine? He lay back down and continued staring at William. He had always loved watching him sleep. While he looked at William, he gently caressed his face. His mind went over the conversation they had and then he remembered the kiss. Liam smiled at the memory. He leaned forward and placed a tentative kiss on William’s slightly parted lips. As he drew back, he saw William’s eyes flutter open. The smile that greeted him made his heart beat faster.

“So it wasn’t a dream?” Liam said shyly.

“What wasn’t a dream?”

“This…”

“No, not a dream. Maybe the last seven years were the dream, and we both are finally waking up.” Will said.

“I like that, but to me the last seven years were a horrible nightmare.”

William rolled onto to his back, bringing Liam with him. Liam rested his head on William’s chest, listening to the thumping of Will’s heart.

“So how much of earlier do you remember Liam?”

“Well when I first woke up, I was confused, especially when I backed into a nice, warm body. When I tried to sit up I thought my head was going to explode, but I remember everything. I’m so sorry I scared you. I know what I did was stupid, but I wasn’t trying to kill myself. I just couldn’t get up.”

“I know that, but please don’t do that again.”

“I won’t.” Liam lifted himself off of William and stood up shakily.

“You okay there?”

“Yea, I’m fine. Just a little shaky. I’m going to take a shower. You still going to be there when I’m finished?”

“Yea, I’m not going anywhere.”

“I know that now.” Liam’s face lit up with a radiant smile and he headed to the bathroom.

Liam turned on the water and proceeded to remove his sweats, and then he climbed into the shower, letting the hot water cascade over his body. He stood there thinking, finally letting go of all the bad memories that fueled him for the last seven years. So deep into his own musings, he never heard the shower door being opened. He jumped when we felt a hand touch his shoulder.

“Missed you,” William whispered as he moved up against Liam’s water-slicked body. Liam turned around so he was fully facing William and smiled shyly at William’s words.

William reached around Liam for the soap, and lathered up his hands. He placed his soapy hands on Liam’s broad shoulders and massaged them, moving down the center of his back, which pulled Liam closer to him so they were chest to chest. Liam sighed. He loved Will’s touch -- nobody had hands like Will. He knew exactly where and how Liam liked to be touched.

“Mmmmmmm that feels good. I’ve missed this -- your touch. You could always make me melt when you touched me.” Liam uttered as he relaxed into the caress of William’s hands.

“Turn around love.” Shivering with emotion, Liam did as William asked. Now his back was against William’s chest. “Can you hand me the soap please?” William lathered up his hands again. As soon as he had a handful of suds, he gave the bar back to Liam who placed it back in the shower caddy. William rubbed his soapy palms on Liam’s chest. He paid particular attention to his nipples. Liam loved having his nipples played with. They were so sensitive. William felt them rise and harden under his touch. He pinched them for a bit, and continued down toward Liam’s stomach.

Liam reveled in the sensual contact of William’s hands. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the gentle brush against his warm skin. William brought his soapy hands to Liam’s hips and ran them down the front of his thighs. He removed his hands for a moment to grab the soap again. When he had another good lather, he ran his palms across Liam’s firm ass. Then he ran his palms down the back of Liam’s thighs. When he reached as far as he could, he squatted and continued down to Liam's calves.

William’s eyes traveled up the body he used to worship. He had a perfect view of Liam’s ass. He just couldn’t resist and placed a kiss where the cheek curved to meet the thigh.

William could hear Liam start to breathe a little faster. “You okay?” He asked. Liam wasn’t used to standing up for this long without his cane and he wanted to make sure he was okay. Liam grinned at him. “I’m more than okay. Please don’t stop.”

“Don’t worry, I have no intention of stopping. Are you sure you are ready for this?”

“I’ve never been more sure of anything."

William switched positions with Liam and gently pushed him up against the shower wall so that he would have some support. He placed his hands on either side of Liam’s head; he leaned in and placed a kiss on each eye, then he kissed the tip of Liam’s nose. He moved his lips and kissed each cheek, before gently kissing his mouth. “Open up for me, love. Let me in. I want to taste you.” Liam did as he requested. As William assaulted his mouth, he removed his hands from the wall and placed them on Liam’s broad shoulders. He moved them down his arms until he reached Liam’s hands. Their fingers entwined while their tongues danced a slow, simmering waltz. He felt Liam’s legs start to shake.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” William asked.

“I’m fine. Forgot how good it felt to have you touch me. I’ve missed it.”

William smiled. William released one of Liam’s hands and brought it across his taut stomach. He brought it down and wrapped his hand around Liam’s rock hard cock. His hand started stroking Liam’s cock. With his other hand he reached up and clasped Liam behind his head and brought it down. William started kissing Liam again softly, then stuck out his tongue, and traced the outline of Liam’s lips. Liam opened his mouth automatically and sucked William’s tongue into his.

“Mmmm … don’t stop Will.” Liam murmured into William’s mouth.

“I have no intention of doing that.” William answered softly.

"Good." Liam managed to get out. He let one of his arms slink around William’s back to pull him closer as he moved in William’s tight fist. At each thrust, Liam’s cock brushed against William’s slippery stomach. Liam grabbed the hand that William was using to tweak his nipples and brought it down to his ass. The force of William’s strokes took the strength from Liam’s legs. He was unable to maintain his balance, and he stumbled against William and slid down the wall a bit.

William removed his hand from Liam’s cock and helped him back up. “Okay, that’s it.” He spun around, turned the water off, and opened the shower door.

“I’m okay, Will. Honest.”

“No you are not. You almost fell.” William pulled him from the shower and grabbed a towel off the rack. He started to dry Liam off, paying attention to every nook and cranny on Liam’s body. When he was dry, he wrapped the towel around Liam’s waist. “Now sit!” Liam did as instructed. He sat there watching William dry himself off, watching the towel as it moved along Will’s body, imagining that it was his hands fondling the soft skin.

When he was dry, William wrapped the towel around his waist and helped Liam up. He opened the bathroom door and led Liam out into the bedroom. Liam looked around the room in wonder.

“I see you’ve been busy.” There were candles lit around the room, a fire roaring in the wood stove, and classical music was playing softly in the background. The curtains were still open letting in the night.

“Well it was a bit chilly in here, so I thought I’d warm it up a bit for you. Besides I remember how much you liked fires.”

William took Liam over to the bed and pushed him down. He kneeled in front of Liam and looked at his injured leg. Liam tried to pull it out of his grasp. “It’s okay, Will. Honest. It’s you that makes me weak-kneed.”

“Are you sure? How’s the pain? You need a pill?”

“No, it’s fine. Really. Now quit worrying. Aren’t there other things you’d rather be doing?”

William looked up and saw a glint in his eyes. Liam stuck out his tongue nervously and ran it around his lips to moisten them. William stood up and pushed Liam back on the bed and just looked at him. The moonlight coming through the window illuminated Liam. His body shimmered against the backdrop of the dark sheets. “God, but you are a beautiful sight,” William whispered. Liam opened his arms, welcoming William. Will kneeled on the bed and crawled up Liam’s body, flicking his tongue over his skin. When he was over Liam, he laid his body on top of him. He lay there for a few minutes listening to Liam’s rapidly beating heart.

William sat up slowly and straddled Liam’s waist. He ran his fingers across Liam’s forehead, down the contour of his cheek and across his lips. Liam was on automatic pilot, he opened his mouth and took William’s finger into his mouth, sucking on it. William bent down and replaced his finger with his mouth and tongue. He drew Liam’s tongue into his mouth and began to suckle it. Liam moaned in pleasure and tried to pull William closer. The kiss continued until the both of them had to stop so they could catch their breath. They were nose to nose, staring into each other’s eyes while their breathing slowed.

Once they had their breath back, William moved his mouth to Liam’s ear and ran his tongue along the rim of it, starting at the top and following the curve until he reached the lobe. As he nibbled, he felt Liam’s hands reach for his waist. He continued tracing his tongue down Liam’s neck sucking gently. Liam turned his head so more of his neck was exposed to William. He loved it when William laved his throat. It was so sensitive and William’s actions sent a bolt of electricity straight through his body. Liam reached up behind William’s head and gently pushed him down harder on his neck.

“Oh God, yes Will.” Liam moaned. When Liam loosened his grip on his head, William slid down the hard body. He fondled one of Liam’s nipples while he took the other in his mouth and started flicking it with his tongue and gently biting it. Liam raised his chest to encourage William to do more. Not wanting to disappoint his lover, Will intensified his ministrations.

He slowly moved down the body and circled Liam’s navel with his tongue, occasionally dipping his tongue into the indentation. Liam lifted his hips up against William, wanting…needing the friction against his raging cock. William pressed his weight down to give Liam what he was seeking. “Please Will. I can’t stand it. It’s been too long. Please…” Liam moaned. “Patience love,” William breathed across his skin between kisses. “I’ll give you want you want soon, but I’m not done worshipping this gorgeous body of yours.” Liam groaned in frustration.

William continued moving down Liam’s body, ignoring the hard cock. He ran his tongue down the inside of Liam’s thigh until he reached his knee. He took Liam’s uninjured leg by the ankle and brought it up so he could lick the back of Liam’s knee. That was another sensitive spot on Liam’s body. He moved Liam’s leg so it bent at the knee and continue running his tongue down the calf to the ankle. He ran his tongue across the top of Liam’s foot until he reached the tip of his toe. He took a toe into his mouth and started sucking on it. Liam about bolted off the bed when William did this. Liam heard him trying to stifle a giggle.

“Don’t you like that?” William asked innocently.

“Don’t tease Will. You know I do.” Liam lay back down as William returned to sucking his toes, and then moved his tongue back up Liam’s legs, alternating his licking with small nibbles until he reached the juncture where the leg met his hip.

“Please Will …You are driving me crazy. I need you…please.” Liam whined in desire and pleasure. His hands were fisting the sheets in frustration and need.

William decided to quit teasing Liam. He reached over the side of the bed to the glass of water that was sitting on the floor. He drew out an ice cube and put it in his mouth. He sucked on the cold cube for a few seconds, and then placed his mouth over the head of Liam’s cock. Making sure the ice was secured in his mouth, he swiped the head of Liam’s leaking dick with his cool tongue. Liam’s body shivered at the icy sensation. William wrapped his hand around the base of Liam’s member, opened his mouth and slowly slid his cold mouth down the length until he reached the curly, brown pubic hairs. Liam bowed his back off the bed as the tingle of William’s cold mouth clashed with the heat of his hot cock. He loved the feeling of the cool mouth and eagerly stretched William's lips with small thrusts. William bobbed his head up and down the cool cock, slowly taking in every inch. His fingers lazily trailed along the velvet soft sack.

“Will, if you keep doing that I’m gonna cum. I don’t want to yet. Please have mercy. I want to cum with you inside me. Please…now…”

William reached for the tube of lube he had pushed under the bed just in case. He flicked open the lid and squirted a generous amount into his hand. When he had his fingers nice and slick, he moved them down to Liam’s quivering hole. “Open up for me love.” Liam spread his legs open as far as he could. William moved his head down to where his fingers were and gently blew on Liam’s entrance. He watched fascinated as it clenched and then relaxed, causing his mouth to water. He ran his tongue around the sensitive flesh and eased it in a bit. Liam moved down to take more of Will’s tongue, sighing in pleasure as he did so. William continued fucking Liam with his tongue for a few minutes. When he removed his tongue, Liam moaned at the loss. William wasted no time and quickly inserted a wet finger. Liam was so relaxed, it slid in easily. William started moving it in and out slowly, purposely avoiding that sweet spot. He withdrew his finger and replaced it with two and then three. He increased his motion in and out of Liam’s hole. Liam matched the rhythm that William set. On every other thrust, Liam felt Will’s fingers rub across his prostate. Close to ecstasy he pumped faster pleading for more.

“Will, please…not enough. I need you inside of me now, please.”

On the last stroke, William removed his fingers. He reached down for the lube again and put more into his hand, stroking himself with one hand, he teased Liam’s ass with his other hand. Liam was on the edge, and he knew if Will didn’t hurry up, he was going to come right then and there. Liam reached down with his own hand and grabbed his cock at the base and squeezed hard to stop himself from coming.

“Now Will. Fuck me now, pleeeeeeeeeassssssse!”

William entered Liam slowly. Liam couldn’t wait and he thrust down quickly until William was fully inside him. William wasn’t moving, and Liam couldn’t stand it. So he started moving, fucking himself on William’s cock. Up and down, back and forth, slowly at first, then quickening the pace, but it wasn’t fast or hard enough. Liam tried to grab Will’s hips, but he couldn’t quite reach.

“Please Will. I need it faster and harder.” Liam felt Will grab his legs and moved them up onto his shoulders, being careful of his still injured leg. William began to move, slowly at first. “Faster Will. Harder…Oh God harder please!”” He felt William pick up the pace and he was soon pounding furiously into Liam. Liam stroked his leaking cock, trying to keep pace with William’s movement. He knew he wasn’t far from the edge. William hit his spot with each thrust and Liam rolled his head back and forth in ecstasy.

“Harder Will. I’m coming…I’m coming.” Liam erupted in his hand sending his seed flying up on his stomach and chest. His ass contracted around Will’s cock as he came. As Liam screamed his lover’s name, he felt Will thrust deeply once more. He clenched his muscles hard to hold William in. He heard William scream his name as his seed pulsed into his ass. Liam kept contracting around Will until he drew every drop out of him. He felt Will begin to pull out of him, but Liam shook his head. “No, stay in. Don’t want you to leave yet.” He panted out between breaths. He reached up and drew Will down to him, making sure he stayed embedded inside. They lay together sated. Liam stroked up and down William’s back, perfectly content, pleasantly exhausted. Soon Liam started shivering. William slowly slid out, licking Liam’s stomach until here wasn’t a drop of fluid left.

“Mmmmmmm, you taste so good.” When he was done, William started to roll off the bed. Liam reached out to grab him. “Where are you going?”

“The fire is almost out. I’m going to throw a few more logs on it.”

“Mmmmmm okay, but come back quick.” Liam answered as he stretched his body as far as he could. Before Liam finished stretching, William was back in bed pulling the covers up over them. He pulled Liam into his arms. Liam felt cherished and safe wrapped protectively within William’s embrace. Then he felt William nestle his head in the crook of his throat. William fell asleep to the comforting feel of Liam's steady pulse against his lips. Liam closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep. Finally, they had found their way home.

** The End **

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