INFO: please see 18a for disclaimers, ratings, etc.
The portal opened easier this time, as if having been invoked once before,
it
was already familiar with the way. The loud shreiking heralded its arrival,
and soon the objects and the occupants of the basement apartment once again
faced a familiar whirlwind.
Willow shouted over the din, ::This is more than the portal! Its the
demon....it doesnt
want them to come back!::
Wesley nodded at her, his expression grim. He had long known Angel had
a
purpose, a reason for his existance which perhaps even the Vampire himself
was not aware of. The sheer force with which the Darker Powers fought his
return to the living could only mean that his design was more crucial than
any had imagined.
A small shiver gripped the Watcher before he could suppress it.
If the vampire did not make it back, more than a freind would be lost this
night.
*************************************************************************
Angel raised an eyebrow and took two steps back. ::Heaven as in--THE Heaven?
I dont -- Im confused. Giles, are we dead?::
The Watcher continued to contemplate the massive structure before him with
a
mixture of awe and and not a small bit of terror. Then he too took a step
away.
::No. No I dont think we are dead. I think this is more of the
manifestation....Angel what religion are you?::
::When I was alive...I was..I mean...Catholic, I suppose. Why?::
::Tell me about what has manifested for you thusfar.:: The Watcher replied,
ignoring the question. Angel did as requested, giving Giles a slightly
abridged version of recent events. He did not leave out information which
might be dire to their cause; he wanted nothing more than to return home.
On
the other hand, he did not want to discuss his sex life..... with the
Watcher... in front of the gates of heaven....
((Spike was *never* going to beleive this))
Had he just said things couldnt get any stranger?
Giles grinned. ::Well, you are certainly a man of simple metaphor.::
((O my God I am humbly sorry for having offended Thee))
The vampire looked confused. ::Youre saying this is me?:: he gestured to
the
gate
looming in front of them.
((And I detest all my sins))
Giles nodded. ::Yes...although perhaps some of my own projections are being
manifested as well....Im not entirely certain. I never thought about Heaven,
really. Im not sure I even believe there is such a thing...Though I must
admit it seems very arrogant and quite possibly foolish to say so standing
...*here*.:: There was a familiar self-mocking in the Watchers tone,
which
Angel had once known so well.
((Because I dread the loss of Heaven and the pains of Hell))
The vampire returned the wry grin. ::Yea, well...I remember all My Hail
Marys
at this
moment too. Although I guess genuflecting might be out of the question
for
me....::
((But most of all for having offended Thee, O Lord my God))
Giles looked at him thoughtfully. ::What does Heaven mean to you, Angel?::
((Who is all good and deserving of all my love))
The answer fell from his lips before he was aware he had even formulated
a
thought.
::Resolution.::
((I firmly resolve to confess my sins...))
::Indeed.:: Giles nodded.
((And with the help of Thy grace ...))
::Angel, I want you to know something.:: The Watcher turned to face him
now,
his gaze steady. :: I am aware you are not your demon. That he lives within
you, and that you struggle for tenuous control daily. And still, I couldnt
bear to look at you after what was done. I can never forgive the monster
that
resides inside you. But I forgave the man a long time ago. I forgive you,
Angel.::
((To sin no more))
The taller man took a ragged breath, but was silent as the Englishman
continued. :: I
believe I understand now what this represents for me as well....its not
merely my
forgiveness of you.....its -- Angel, I need to ask your forgiveness as
well.::
Angel froze. Giles was asking him for forgiveness? What trespass could
the
man possibly have committed that was not wholly justified given their history
together? Angel struggled to recall the last time anyone had ever asked
his
forgivness of anything. He honestly could not recall a single instance.
For
the last hundred years it was he who constantly felt the need to grovel
at
the feet of everyone alive, begging for absolution for merely *existing*.
The
vampire had absolutely no idea what to say.
Giles frowned, :: I understand if you feel you cannot give it just yet...::
Angel took a step closer to the man, then hesitated, as if thinking the
better of it. ::Youre not gonna hit me again, are you?:: the vampire grinned.
The tension was broken with a laugh. ::No, Im quite done with that. I rather
think I broke my hand on your face, actually.::
Angel swallowed, ::Giles, I -- I have no idea what you want me to forgive
you
for. After all I did...I dont --::
::I want you to forgive me for not taking better care of her.:: The Watcher
whispered.
There was no mistaking the heartbreak and shame in the softly spoken words.
The
vampire closed his eyes as he realized what Giles meant.
::Gods, Giles,. thats not your fault....none of this is...its not anyones
fault.:: Angel thought back to the similar words Will had used to assure
him
of that, not weeks ago. He was amazed to discover he actually believed
them
now.
The Watcher was standing with his back facing Angel, and the vampire could
see the defeated posture and the subtle, rythmic shaking of the strong
shoulders. It occured to Angel that Giles probably would not have allowed
himself to cry in front of the others. He would have held it in..been strong
for them...how long he had considered them all his family...his... children.
And now it came to this....
((Blood of a new and everlasting covenant))
Without thinking, Angel placed a hand on Giles shoulder in comfort. Again,
words fell
unbidden from his tongue. ::Youre forgiven, Giles. For everything you did
and
never did, for everything you could have done, youre forgiven. I forgive
you.
Buffy forgives you.::
The vampire was amazed at the tremor in his voice, the bitter taste of
tears
in his throat. How was it possible that speaking those words was akin to
recieving them?
((We are not worthy, but Lord say the word and we shall be healed))
The two men stood for a long while, staring at the illusory gates.
************************************************************************
Spike stood over the immobile body of the larger vampire, the blood flowing
freely from his slashed wrist into the dark haired mans mouth.
A message. The witch had told him he had to send Angel a message. To find
the
portal. To get Giles. To come home.
It felt so strange to be feeding him this way. Almost... parental. But
there
was no suckling at the wound, no tongue lapping up the precious drops.
Just a faint movement of the long neck...Adams apple bobbing up and
down...the blood dissapearing.
((Home...Angel...))
************************************************************************
::Do you have any idea how to get back home?:: Angel asked, aware that
the
longer he stood here, the less he seemed to care about ever leaving. On
some
level, he knew this was myth. Sugar coated in demon enhanced sensations,
but
nonetheless, essentially nothing more than an optical illusion. He knew
that
Spike would be worried about him. The others worried about Giles.
But there was some ...force summoning him from just the other side of this
magnificent barrier. It had no voice, not even inside his head. This
sensation predated even verbal memory. Although if he listened closely
enough, he thought he could make out the faint sound of a steady beat.
A
heartbeat.
The lure of a human heartbeat to a vampire. The contentment of a lovers
heartbeat as a human. The lull of a mothers heartbeat from within the womb.
It was primal, and utterly irresistable. Angel hadnt felt its like since
...since he had been a man.
It was comfort.
And he wanted it.
The more he stared at the majestic gates shooting like flames into the
darkened sky, the more he wanted to crawl inside them. Bang on them
incessently if necessary until someone or something swung them wide and
beckoned --
::Angel!:: he snapped his head round at the sharp tone. ::Stop staring
at
it.::
The vampire appeared dazed for a moment, then he nodded slowly. ::It--I
think
it wants me.::
Giles frowned. ::And the Devil shall tempt thee with finery.::
::Im a little rusty on all this...care to translate?::
::If it does want you, it cant be good --::, catching the look
on the
vampires face, the Watcher quickly amended, ::because Heaven knows youre
not
done on Earth quite yet. Youre needed, for something....What Im saying
is
that if *this*, whatever this is, is trying to take you away from your
duties, then it cannot be the Powers of Goodness.::
::The Powers That Be,:: Angel said quietly.
::Yes, quite. This is not them. Which begs the question, how do we get back?::
Angel looked momentarily alarmed. ::I thought you came here to rescue me.
Dont you know how to get back?::
::Well, Ripper always barked a bit bigger than his bite....Im afraid in
terms
of getting
back, the most I can offer is that it is entirely up to you.::
((Angel!))
The vampire started. A voice. Wills voice. Inside his head.
((ANGEL!!))
Damn. Wills *loud* voice.
((Hey! Poof with the stupid hair! The witch sent the blue spinnin thing.
Find
the goddamn light and get yer ass back here. I dont fancy spendin any more
time with these pathetic humans than I already have. And I owe you one
helluva ass kickin for that shit you pulled earlier....))
All right. So he wasnt exactly Jimminy Cricket.
The vampire turned to the man. ::Giles? The spinning blue thing? That was
some sort of door?::
::Yes....into your ..well...your head one supposes. And out of it...Only
now
that its gone, we really have no way of-----::
::You were saying?:: Angel pointed East, in the direction of the gathering
clouds, and a blinding blue light.
*************************************************************************
End Part 18