In a bar, somewhere, in some city…..

A tall, golden blonde man approaches the bar and orders. "House Special,
please."

"You too, huh?"

The blonde man turns to see that a dark-haired man, dressed in black is
addressing him. "What?"

"House Special. You're a vampire, too. Didn't I just see you at the
Angsters Anonymous meeting? You're Nick, right?"

"Yeah, um… Angel, wasn't it?"

"Yes, nice to meet you." Angel holds out his hand to Nick.

Nick shakes Angel's hand and picks up the drink the bartender has brought.
"Nice to meet you, too. Do you want to grab a table?"

"Sure, it's pretty crowded, though." Angel looks around the room. "There's
another guy from the meeting. Wasn't his name…. I don't remember, something
Scottish, I think."

"Duncan."

"Yeah. Maybe we can all three talk."

"Sounds like a plan. After you."

Angel and Nick approach the table where a powerfully built man with dark
hair just brushing his collar is sitting. "Excuse me. We were wondering if
we could join you?" Nick nods politely when Duncan looks up. "I'm Nick and
this is Angel. We recognized you from the Angsters Anonymous meeting
earlier."

Duncan waives his hand at the empty chairs. "Sure, have a seat. I remember
seeing you two at the meeting. Vampires, right?"

Nick and Angel sit down and nod their heads. "Yes, but how did you know? Do
we look different somehow or does everyone just 'know'?" Angel inquires.

"Well, I'm an immortal and I've met a few vampires in my time, but I don't
think just anyone would pick up on the 'not breathing and awfully pale'
thing. Although, I don't know why more people don't."

"Immortal? 'Off with their heads' type immortal?" Nick inquires.

"So you know about us, too?" Duncan nods. "Yeah, that kind. So what made
you two join Angsters? I would think your lives would be pretty simple,
being remorseless killers and all."

Nick shakes his head in disagreement. "Well, see, that's why I'm having so
much trouble. I grew a conscious or it never really went away, I'm not sure
which. I've been working for years to make up for all the bad things I've
done. Most recently I was a detective up in Toronto."

"Gypsy curse, got my soul back. Private detective." Angel explains briefly.

The other two nod in sympathetic understanding and they all take sips of
their respective drinks. "And you Duncan, why did you join?" The blonde
vampire asks.

"My friends insisted I get some help. I don't see why they think I need
help; I'm only trying to do the right thing all the time. Fighting evil,
forgoing needless killing and showing others the error of their ways isn't
wrong, is it?"

"No, not wrong, but it cuts down on the fun possibilities. Or at least
that's what my childe tells me." Angel's brow wrinkled as he fell into
silent contemplation of the tabletop.

"Try having a two-thousand year old father who is always on your case about
'be who you were created to be, live as you were meant to live, stop this
ridiculous quest for humanity'." Nick shakes his head and sighs.

"I've got you both beat there. The guy who pushed me into doing this is so
old he doesn't even remember how old. I'm talking over five thousand years
old. Not much he hasn't seen and he never let's you forget that fact,
either. Some people just don't get it." Duncan downs the rest of his scotch
and signals the waitress for another.

Angel raises his head and stares off into the distance. "At least you two
could be happy if you wanted. If I try to be happy… poof goes the soul and
I'm back to being a very bad man. Lost the love of my life that way."

"You killed her?" Duncan was shocked.

"No, but nearly. It was on the schedule for right before I opened a vortex
to suck the world into Hell. I think she forgave me but we broke up anyway.
There was just too much to overcome, like the fact that she had to send *me
*, not my evil self, to hell to save the world.. and we can't have sex."

"Oh, that is a tough break. Sorry about that, Angel. I know how you feel
though. I killed my last girlfriend. I didn't mean to, but you know how it
is when you lay off the good stuff for a long time and then there it is
being offered willingly. Couldn't control myself… just one more thing for
my father to lord over me." Nick asks the waitress for another House
Special for himself and Angel.

"Boy, you both do have some tough lives. My girlfriend died, too. I didn't
kill her, I can accept that now, but she died because someone wanted my
head." Duncan thought a moment and then offered. "But I did kill the man I
thought of as a son. An accident. I thought it was this demon named
Ahriman, but still, my fault."

"You killed Ahriman? Hmm, I wondered who that was. Good work, by the way.
I'll have to let Giles know he's not a threat for another thousand years."
Angel accepts his fresh drink from the waitress.

All three are silent until the waitress leaves. Nick finally breaks the
silence. "So, Angel… you can't have sex? That's a tough break."

"Oh, I can have sex… empty, meaningless sex. I just can't have sex with
anyone that could ever make me happy. Of course people forget that I can be
happy *without * sex…. well, in theory, anyway. I just don't get the
whining and nagging.. Constantly with the 'stop brooding, you're bringing
me down' thing. I mean do they want me to go all evil?" Angel shakes his
head sadly and takes another sip of his drink.

"So angsting is not just a… life choice, it's a necessity… that's just…
sad." Duncan falls silent and brooding, thinking maybe he doesn't have it
so bad after all.

"Yeah. I'm sorry man, that's got to be rough. No way to get it fixed or
anything?" Nick asks.

Angel shakes his head and looks even more depressed. "I haven't found a way
yet, but I'm not even sure I want to."

Duncan looks very shocked and just has to ask. "But why not? Surely you
want some happiness in your life?"

"Well, I'm afraid that if there's the possibility of happiness then I'll
stop doing my penance."

Nick nods in understanding and frowns. "I don't know, Angel. I have the
opportunity to be happy even if I don't take it but that hasn't stopped me
from repaying society for my sins. I think you underestimate yourself."

"You think so? I don't know… Spike keeps telling me I can have a little fun
without endangering my soul or my cause, but….. I just don't know."

"Who's Spike? And why is he named Spike?" Nick's lips quirk up in a smile.
"It's not a sexual thing, is it?"

Angel actually chuckles before answering. "Spike is my childe and no, his
name is not a sexual reference. Although I'm sure he'd be pleased if
everyone thought so. He got it from his habit of using railroad spikes on
his victims."

"Ooo, sounds nasty. He doesn’t do that anymore does he?" Duncan tenses. If
there was someone out there doing that kind of thing, he'd have to go make
sure they were stopped.

"No, he doesn't. Which I'm glad of since that would mean I would have to
kill him. I think I'd miss him if I did that. He's one of the few bright
points in my world…. even if he does think I'm a terrible boor."

"Same goes for me… I mean, LaCroix is an evil SOB sometimes but he's cut
back a bit these last few years. Just don't ever suggest he's mellowing or
that he does it because he knows I won't stick around if he goes back to
his usual methods." Nick gets lost in thought for a moment. "I did try to
kill him once, though. Obviously it didn't take, but he pissed me off
pretty good. I guess he finally realized he could only push me so far."

"So vampires have.. what.. families?" Duncan looks a little depressed at
the thought.

"Yeah, sometimes. Just depends. Why?" Nick signals the waitress for another
drink.

"Immortals are all orphans and when we meet another immortal we're supposed
to try to kill each other. Not exactly the basis for family life. I manage
to have a few friends that are immortal but all of us know that some day it
may come down to facing each other. It's… lonely sometimes."

"Sounds like we all have good reasons to be in this group. I don't know if
angsting less will be a good thing for any of us. Maybe we shouldn't try to
change." Nick puts forth.

"Yeah. I'm with Nick on this one. I'll tell Spike that he's just going to
have to accept me the way I am and stop nagging me about it."

"And I'm going to tell Methos to stuff it the next time he starts going on
about me being too much of a boy scout."

"And I'm going to tell LaCroix that he can't expect me to give up my quest
for forgiveness just because * he* doesn't like it."

The rebellious trio nods in agreement with each other and stand, throwing
bills on the table and make their way out to the parking lot.

Nick stops beside a classic Cadillac convertible. "Well, this is me. If
we're all quitting, I guess I won't see you guys again. Good luck with
your… uh… lives."

Duncan and Angel shake hands with Nick and continue on their way. Duncan
stops next to a classic Thunderbird convertible. "And this is me." A sword
magically appears in his hand, drawn from some mysterious space inside his
coat and is put into the back seat. He turns to shake hands with Angel.
"Don't let Spike get you down. Do what's right for you."

"Thanks Duncan. I'm just over there." Angel motions to the classic Plymouth
Belvidere convertible. "So, I guess this is goodbye. You stick to your
resolve, as well. Don't let that Methos guy talk you into anything you
don't want to do."

"Will do, Angel. Nice to meet you." Duncan climbs into his car and waives a
final goodbye to Angel.

*******************

Two weeks later, the same bar…..

"Angel, Nick? What are you two doing here?" Duncan slides onto a barstool
next to the blonde vampire.

"Getting a little liquid courage before going to the meeting." Nick answers
morosely.

"Same here." Angel's eyes drop back to the bar. "You?"

"Umm…I… Okay, I'll admit it. He just wouldn't shut up! And then he brought
Amanda into it and between the two of them…." Duncan sighs unhappily and
orders a drink.

"I know what you mean. Spike actually talked my employee's into mutiny if I
didn't continue with the meetings. If you knew how those three normally get
along, you'd understand just how amazing and frightening that is."

"LaCroix just threatened me. But it was a good threat….. very well done,
obviously."

All three sigh.

"Spike will be waiting for me outside the meeting hall to make sure I
actually went."

"Same with Methos."

"LaCroix, too."

Another group sigh.

"We are really pathetic, you know?" Nick asks.

"Yeah." Duncan agrees.

"Life just…. sucks…. and then you have to go to support groups."

Angel's pronouncement is met with another trio of sighs and another round
of drinks being ordered.

THE END.
 

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