Pairings: A/C, F/G
Spoilers: Up to and including Couplet, only Cordelia didn't do that naughty thing at the end of Couplet...
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Cordelia's parents drop in to see Cordelia, Angel has to face up to the father-in-law from hell and living with the embarassment of her mother hitting on everything male in sight almost proves too much for Cordelia to bear.
Disclaimer: They belong to David Greenwalt, Joss Whedon etc...
Feedback: Love it, need it, crave it... "It's like a Sickness..."
Dedication: To all the people who've given me feedback throughout this story - thanks *ever* so much! LOL... Thanks!!!
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~Part: 1~
"Why do I have to go?" Asked Cordelia, frowning. Things with Angel had been... Well, tense to say the least. After the little ballet thing (little? Who the hell was she kidding? She'd almost been on top of him... She'd almost given him a happy! Well, he'd been closer to - details weren't the point.) The point was that Fred and Gunn had gone out for the night, presumably to somewhere happy where they could sit and smooch all over each other. Blergh. Happy couples. Not that Cordelia wasn't happy per se... It was just she was... Well, cynical, bitchy and just that teeny little bit jealous. Of course, this was entirely her own fault. She'd been able to go off on the holiday of a lifetime and instead, she'd returned, handed the money back to Angel and said that Catalina just wasn't her style. Besides... Pfft! Been there, done that, got the T-shirt. Well, the bikini at least. And Catalina was boring in the summer - it wasn't like anyone would KNOW she was lying. Like Wes was a frequent visitor to the place... Yeah, she could just see him in his two piece and... Ewwww! Scary visual place.
Shaking out of her reverie, Cordelia looked at Wesley, "Why can't YOU go? I mean, I can stay here and be book guy... I can look up words and stuff. Give me words!"
"Cordelia..."
"Wesley, I don't WANT to... You go! As Senior Associate, I get a say in this, right?"
"Normally, yes, but I'm afraid that..."
"The demon won't hurt you, Wesley. You said yourself Angel killed it..."
"I'm afraid I'm rather close with deciphering this prophecy and would rather spend my time on this rather than wasting it on something YOU could be helping Angel with. Cordelia, I realise things have been rather tense between the two of you and..."
"RATHER TENSE?" Asked Cordelia, "Wesley, we almost got groiny with one another! I can't even train in case..."
"In case feelings overload..."
"No, in case he stiffens up again!"
Wesley blushed accordingly, "Cordelia, you and Angel must work side by side, I feel it best if you go now to assist Angel in the disposal of this demon."
"But..."
"No buts, Cordelia." Said Wesley, shaking his head. "I imagine relationships between you and Angel are rather strained..."
"Y'got that right..."
"But nonetheless," He continued regardless of the intrusion, "I feel it best if you and Angel deal with this in a mature and grown up manner. Now go."
"But..."
"Cordelia." His voice would brook no argument. Deep down, she knew he was right but like she'd admit that! "Fine! Fine!"
* * * * *
"Ugh, demons! Could there be anything less disgusting?" Asked Cordelia, pulling what could only be described as parts along the sewer floor. "Oh, wait. There couldn't be." She stated, her voice dripping with sarcasm.
"You are half demon." Angel reminded her, dragging his own parts across the sewer floor.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Huffed the brunette, suddenly dropping the demon piece she was carrying, "Are you saying I'm disgusting?"
"No, I..."
"I am NOT disgusting! And for the record, Mister, I only smell like this because I'm in this place with you!"
"Hey..." Said Angel, "I sad you could go home!"
"Are you saying I'm useless now?" She asked, annoyed.
"What? No! You're twisting my words!" Said Angel, jumping to his defense. Shifting demon parts was shifting demon parts but arguing with Cordelia was *really* bad.
"Oh," And so it began. "First, I'm disgusting..."
"I never..."
"Then, I'm useless."
"Cordy..."
"Now I'm a Word Twister?" She asked, her voice dangerously low. Threatening. Very 'Cordelia-When-She-Was-Pissed' like.
"Cordelia, I..."
"Well, fine! You can just go ahead and shift these... These... Demon guts alone!"
Assessing the situation, Angel watched her retreating form. Watched the stomp that had been there with Gunn when he'd suggested her appetite had been large. Watched as her hands rested on those perfect hips. Heard the 'hmph' as she reached the end of the sewer tunnel. And it was then that Angel realised something was very wrong. Cordelia was gone. Leaving him behind to shift a huge demon, leaving him behind to wonder what the hell had happened in those last two minutes when things had just escalated from absolutely nothing. Angel sighed. First, the demon. And then, Cordelia.
* * * * *
He'd once been accused of less than stealthy entrances. If making an impression such as this was anything to go by then the way the client looked at him was evidence enough for the fact that Angel wasn't likely to get the case. He glowered. He glared. In fact, the man was quite formiddable in stature enough to intimidate, even slightly a two hundred and fifty year old vampire. But, of course, just slightly. Being careful not to poke himself with his sword (that was not so deftly tucked into his jacket), Angel gave what could almost be considered a brooding nod. He wanted to find Cordelia, not play 'Stare Me Out' with the glowery guy in front of him.
"Angel, I presume." Barked the man.
"Depends who wants to know." Angel was NOT in the mood.
His eyes darkened and he took in Angel's posture, deeming him automatically unsuitable. For what, the job? Or something else? "If you're always like this with potential clients, I'm surprised you get work at all." He growled.
Angel frowned, "Well, if I want tips from you on how to run my business I'll be sure to give you a call, Mr..."
"Chase." Said the man, simply. "Aaron Chase. I believe my daughter works for you."
It was then, that Angel saw the woman sitting next to him, a striking older version of his best friend. It was then, he saw Cordelia, standing at the door, her mouth agape, just staring at Angel - the look in her eyes unmistakable.
You are *So* dead.
Angel gulped.
~Part: 2~
He'd faced demons, monsters and hell hounds by the score. He'd lived through the equivalent of three hundred years in Hell. He'd been atoning for his sins for almost two hundred and fifty years. But nothing struck fear into his heart (and the Death March into his head) like this...
This, was the kind of beast that fed on fear, trepidation... More dangerous that ANY demon or monster that could be found? He was the potential Father-In-Law. Okay, so perhaps Angel was jumping the gun here. He wasn't even sure Cordelia honestly LIKED him that way but... It could happen. He guessed. And plus, the last time he'd felt like this was going to see a girl's parents he was courting back in the day. Of course, he'd killed them when they'd refused permission for him to marry their daughter and then turned her into his childe but... Drusilla had forgiven him. And it wasn't like he could do that here, right?
(Oh but how he wished.)
From the moment he'd walked in the door, he'd felt the hostility come from Cordelia's father in waves. Huge waves. Tsunami's. It wasn't pleasant.
"Dad, why are you wearing a pink shirt?" In an attempt to alleviate the antartic conditions within the hotel right now, Cordelia tried to sway the conversation onto territory that was less... Dangerous?
And more like a minefield. She could see her father's face turning different colours as he spoke. "Well, you'd think after three years she'd know how to work a washing machine." He bit.
"Did I *ask* you to dirty the shirt? Nooo... Did I ask you to..."
"Uhm, Mom, Dad - have you met Fred? Fred's a physicist." Said Cordelia, hurrying to change the subject, her parents were ALWAYS like this. "She's really smart. Wesley too! And Gunn's the muscle of the group! Angel's..."
"Obviously not the brain." Said Aaron, scathingly.
"Well, no. Fred and Wesley ar - DADDY!" Yelled Cordelia, frowning.
Cordelia's life was never simple. For while her father was insulting her friends. Her mother was standing painfully close to Angel and smiling. Brightly. That 1,000 watt Cordelia Chase smile of CORDELIA's that had aged about 40 years on her own mothers face. "M-O-M." Said Cordelia through gritted teeth. Her mother sprung away from Angel like she'd been caught doing something naughty and smiled brightly, "Yes, baby?"
"Why are you guys here?"
"We just thought we'd come stay with you for a while... We'd have dropped by your apartment but... Well, we wanted to see this nice big hotel of yours and meet this Angel you talk about so much." Cordelia's mother preened, holding out her hand to Angel, "I'm Alara, Cordelia's mother. If you need anything, anything at all feel free to..."
"MOM!"
"Oh, Cordelia, you should lighten up, honey."
"Have you had Band Candy again?" Asked Cordelia, "Cause I'm thinking, if you have? I want to move my wardrobe right out of *town* this time."
"Angel, can I talk to you in the lobby please?" After the initial pause, Cordelia realised that she didn't *want* a favour from Angel, she *needed* a favour from Angel. "Now?"
Standing under the beady, burning gaze of Mr. Chase, Angel went through into the lobby with Cordelia, both of them talking at once...
"Why couldn't you tell me about your parents being here?"
"Could you have shown a little *more* sanity if you'd tried?"
"I didn't know they'd be here..."
"Okay," Said Cordelia, "We need to both stop talking. Then, *I* need to ask you something."
Wisely, Angel stopped talking. "Ask away." He knew what she was going to ask but Angel, being Angel, wanted her to beg. Well maybe not beg, grovelling would be fun too.
"Angel, we have to let them stay here." Said Cordelia, desperately, "I can't take them home, I mean... Dennis! And you've got like a billion rooms in here that AREN'T being used. Please? I'll do anything!"
"But Cordelia..."
"Angel, please! I'm desperate or else I wouldn't have asked you!"
"I'm not so sure it's a good idea, I mean I've already..."
"Annngeeellll!" She whined, looking for all the world like a petulant teenager.
Angel smiled, "Okay, but you owe me BIG time, Cordy."
Sighing, she went back through into the office - where Fred was now standing with Connor in her arms. As soon as Cordelia went in, the little boy raised his arms. "Mama!"
"WHO?!"
"Uh-oh..." Said Angel, shooting a nervous glance at Cordelia.
"You'd better explain yourself, young lady!" Said her father, his glare chilling the recesses of Angel's unbeating heart. Oh yeah, definitely scary alright... Definitely father-in-law material...
This? Spelled bad in more ways than one...
~Part: 3~
Cordelia gulped. Okay, now this? Was definitely bad. She could even have coped with the tenseness between herself and Angel more than she could cope with this. "Uhm..."
"MAMA!" Said Connor, insistently. Cordelia could almost swear the child was giving her father the evil eye for denying him his... Uh... Aunty Cordy. Damnit, why hadn't they corrected him when he'd started calling her Mama, or Mommy or Mamoo on one of his particularly gurglesome days. The child babbled and grinned an almost toothless grin, drool slipping down his chin.
"Ewww!" At first, Angel was shocked - Cordelia had never 'eww'ed at Connor's baby babble before! But it turned out the 'ewww' had come from Cordelia's mother.
Huffing, Cordelia took Connor into her arms and glared at her mother, "Mom, it's only drool."
"ONLY drool? This is a three hundred dollar suit!"
"It washes out!" Said Cordelia.
"Not something I'm exactly willing to find out. Besides..."
"She can't use the washer anyway." Hissed Cordelia's father, "Now, is anyone willing to tell me what's going on?"
"Well, it started with Kyerumption..." Started Fred, smiling. "See..."
"Fred? Now's not the time to start in on the land of Pylea and its theories." Said Cordelia, glancing at her friend apologetically.
"Pylea? Have we been there?" Alara glanced at her husband, "Maybe we can get a cheap cruise or something. Maybe Angel would like to come along." Her gaze swivelled back to Angel and she smiled, winningly.
Well, obviously not winningly enough anyway. "Mom stop HITTING on my friends!" Hissed Cordelia.
"Oh, but honey, you never used to bring home any of your boy friends, especially not this one."
"And you wonder why?" Asked the brunette, raising her eyebrows. "Daddy used to intimidate them to the point of brown stains in their underwear, providing he got to them first, if not you were all over them like a bad rash anyway."
"Pfft..." Alara exhaled, "Nothing wrong with being friendly!"
Angel squirmed uncomfortably and looked at Cordelia. Who'd have thought, her Mom a man-eater? Of course, rumours when Cordelia was in High School would have been quashed immediately. She *was* after all, Cordelia Chase, Queen of Mean...
Not for the first time in her life however, the 'Queen of Mean' felt alienated. Not from her friends - but this time, from her family. Was her Mom really that dumb? Oh God, she wasn't, right? Was it possible that Cordelia had 'caught it' from her Mom???
Seeing the panic flit through her eyes, Angel was by her side, his hand rested protectively on her back, "Vision?"
"You could say that..." Said Cordelia, glancing at her parents then back up at Angel.
"WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON AROUND HERE?" The voice of Aaron Bailey Chase boomed throughout the hotel, making Fred jump back, startled. "First off, where's Pylea? I want to actually know where I'm taking your mother first and I've never heard of this place."
"Oh, you wouldn't want to take a trip to Pylea, Hellish dimensions aren't very nice this time of year. Or... Well, any time of year for that matter. They call you a cow... And sell you into slavery..." Said Fred, "I hear Catalina's nice this time of year."
A worried look passed across Alara's face and she stepped back, warily, "Is she crazy?" She studied Fred, carefully, "The outfit would suggest that she's..."
"MOM!" Cordelia's eyes were blazing now. She'd had enough of the questions, of the constant berating of her friends, "I picked that outfit for Fred!" She said. It was a fact. She and Fred had done the girly thing, gone shopping, bought food, laughed over Wesley and Gunn's antics to get the ex-Pylean prisoners attention, fought a demon when it had risen in Neiman Marcus (AND destroyed a pair of shoes that once upon a time, Cordelia would have KILLED for) killed thanks of course, to her new and improved demon fightin' skills and then gone home with aching feet, pouring over their purchases. The girly thing.
Alara gasped, "YOU picked that outfit? But it's so plain... Well, actually, it would explain yours, I wasn't going to say anything but I thought you'd know better than that, Cordelia."
Cordelia bristled like she'd been slapped. Her Mom wasn't mean, or didn't actually *try* to be. It was just her nature. The completely un-tactful nature that Cordelia thought she'd become immune to. Angel watched Cordelia, then glanced back to her mother. If anything, this might explain the way Cordelia was in High School, the tactless 'not-afraid-to-say-anything' young lady he'd grown accustomed to back in his Sunnydale days. However, Angel didn't like the look on Cordelia's face, she seemed almost hurt by what her mother had said. He watched as she blinked a couple of times, breathed in deeply and then looked at her father, "Meet your Grandson." Tactful, to the point and... Woah, what?
She found a great deal of pleasure in the look on her parent's face. But mostly? The look on Angel's face was priceless. She shot him a gaze, the words dancing in her head, but not from her lips 'Not totally clueless after all, huh Grrr guy?'
"M-my Grandson?" Cordelia's fathers gaze softened slightly from the 'oh-my-God' shocked look, but he still found it in him to glare at Angel, "You impregnate my daughter then insult me? Not a way to go about getting approval for marriage, son..."
Marriage? Okay, but... SON??? I'm at least five times his age! Thought Angel, shaking his head. "I didn't impregnate your daughter."
"Don't lie to me." Hissed Aaron, "There's no denying that that child is yours. He has *your* overhanging forehead and *my* daughter's eyes... He's yours alright."
As Cordelia bent down to grin and look at Connor's eyes, Angel growled, "His name is Connor and... Hey!" A hand came up to his head and Angel felt a frown sliding across his features, "Do people have a fixation with me and an overhanging forehead?" He asked.
Thinking it time to butt in before Angel's own fixation with his overhanging forehead appeared, Cordelia looked at her Mom and Dad, "Listen, there's been some... Changes... In my life. Very big changes."
"Your having a child being one of them." Said Aaron, glaring at Angel, making him shrink back a little.
"Well, there's that." Said Cordelia, taking a deep breath and looking at Angel, unsure what to tell her parents.
"Mama!" Connor had had enough of being ignored. What he saw was his Dad, his Uncles Wesley and Gunn and his Aunty Fred standing, tense looks on their faces and his Mommy - obviously upset about something. He might have been Angel's son, but he wasn't stupid. He started to cry, sob... SCREAM! When Angel went to take him however, Connor was having none of it. He wanted his Mommy and he wanted her out of the bad place. See, the pysche of Angel's son wasn't that complicated.
Mom happy + Dad happy = Nice!
But then, Angel's wasn't that complicated either, 'Cordelia + Naked = Uhm... Bad thoughts' and then 'things' he couldn't exactly hide.
"What's wrong with him?" Said Angel, glancing worriedly at Cordelia. His panicking days were well and truly over (sort of) where his son was concerned, but he seemed perfectly content sitting here in Cordelia's arms - well, as long as Cordelia wasn't in here right now anyway.
"He can sense that everyone's tense." Said Fred, gently. "He's just reacting to what he feels in the room right now. You're looking daggers at his Daddy, his Mommy's looking daggers at her parents - it's a whole dagger thing."
"I'll take him upstairs..." Said Cordelia, battling against the flailing fists of her son as Angel tried (albeit unsuccessfully) to wrench him from her grasp.
As Cordelia crossed the lobby, a thud was heard. As Cordelia crossed the lobby, Angel realised she had stopped and was now floating in mid-air. As Angel turned back, Cordelia's father was glaring imperceptibly at Angel, "SHE FLOATS TOO?"
Fred turned to Wesley and Gunn, "Should I say it or do you guys want to?" She asked.
"Uh-oh..." Said the three friends, simultaneously, glancing at Alara, in her three hundred dollar suit, on the floor, out cold. "Should I get some smelling salts?" Asked Fred.
Angel sighed and went towards Cordelia, "What did you see?"
"What did she see?" Yelled Aaron, "What about me? My daughter's floating!"
"Uhm, yes." Said Wesley.
"Trick of the light?" Offered Gunn.
"Something damned weird is going on around here and I wanna know what..." Growled Cordelia's father.
He growled. GROWLED! A human man growling at a vampire. Angel gulped and looked at Cordelia, "Any chance of us running?"
Looking up at the minion approaching the door, Cordelia shook her head, "Not likely..."
Angel frowned, it was just one thing after another in here...
~Part: 4~
"Was that what was in your vision?" As Angel spoke he edged closer to the weapons cabinet, watching as the Minion came down the stairs.
Nodding, Cordelia hoisted Connor up her hip, ready to attack should the 'thing' come near her. "That's vision boy."
Grabbing an axe, Angel swung toward the Minion, before stopping, "Evil, right?"
Cordelia nodded again, "Angel, kill it!"
Angel swung again until a very womanly shriek was heard across the hotel. Cordelia's mother who'd come to and was watching, her mouth agape. "Stop!"
Angel did as he was told, terminally afraid of her husband and looked at her, "What?"
"You can't kill that!" Said Alara, frowning as she hand-walked along the wall.
"Why not?" The thing was evil! Cordelia had saw it in her vision, ergo death for evil vision thing.
"That's racist! What, just because it doesn't look like us, we have to kill it?" Asked Alara, glaring at poor Angel who just wasn't getting on the good side of Cordelia's parents at all. Well, until now, anyway. Previously, he'd been getting on more than the good side of Cordelia's mother which was actually started to scare him a little. But still, there it was, Cordelia's *own* evil eye, only having aged about twenty years.
"Mom, that's not racism, that's not even HUMAN!" Said Cordelia.
"Oh, stop being so narrow minded." Snapped Alara, "Just because it's not human doesn't mean we have to kill it."
Cordelia's mouth fell open. Narrow minded? Her mother was accusing HER of being narrow minded? Well, wasn't that the pot calling the kettle black?
"Maybe it's from the Projects..." Added Alara.
"MOM! It's not human!" Said Cordelia, "That means, it's NOT from the Projects, it's not from the POOR part of town, it means it's from some stinky hell dimension that has something that wants to kill us and it's sent this to do it!"
Alara sighed and glanced at her husband, "Cordelia always was melodramatic. Didn't I say we should take her to a counsellor? I always said we should have taken her to a counsellor..."
For the first time in her life, she couldn't manage a 'pffft' or a 'hmph' or anything. Cordelia was rendered speechless, breathless and all other kinds of 'less' by her own mother. Narrow minded AND crazy? Oh, come ON! And she was what? Open-minded and sane? Pfft!
The trespassing Minion was less than stupid. He sensed hostility from most everyone in the hotel, all directed towards the elder couple. He sensed hostility towards the vampire by the elder man, waves of appreciation and lust towards the vampire from two of the women in the room - obviously related - and empathy towards himself from the elder brunette woman. However, he also sensed the axe - even Minions (who were only interested in the drinking of the frog juice, the having of the sex and the tipping of the cows) could sense when discretion was the better part of valour and so proceeded... Attaching his most pathetic look to his face (which was a cross between a bulldog chewing a wasp and an empathic demon high on prescription drugs), he ambled forwards, whining considerably his face creased into what he hoped was something resembling pathetic, stupid and cute and was in fact none of those three - he increased his steps until he was by Alara's side.
"He's so cute." Alara beamed at him, "And where do you come from?" She asked, showing more kindness to a minion than she had to her own grandson.
Even a vision hangover would be easier than this. Thought Cordelia, staring at her mother. The migraine was coming thick and fast, now she understood why she rarely called her parents, ever. "Mom, it's not a child! It's an evil, stinky MINION!"
"Cordelia!" Everyone jumped at the sound of Alara's raised voice - they were used to Cordelia's father barking and shouting but not her mother. "Have some tact, would you? The poor thing has feelings!"
"Ohhh, I know what this is!" Said Fred, smiling brightly as Cordelia just stood there, stunned... "It's like those programmes Daddy used to watch before I got taken to Pylea! Where someone would have the worst possible day and someone would be secretly filming it for a while and then they'd jump out and win a car or something!" Said Fred, "That's what this is, isn't it?"
Cordelia raised an eyebrow, "If I got a car every time this happened? I'd be rich. Again." She said, shaking her head.
A Minion's attention span is believed to be considerably less than a goldfish. He forgot his original plan of trying to befriend the woman who'd defended his stinky minionness and instead, went to grab her, to bargain with the vampire - if he handed over his son, then the woman wouldn't die. However, Angel was quicker than he - vampiric speed proving imperative in this particular scenario as he swung the axe...
Before the body fell to the floor the "Ewww, look at my three hundred dollar suit!" screech rang throughout the hotel. Perhaps if it was red blood (or normal blood for that matter) Alara mightn't have been as disgusted. Perhaps if it wasn't bright blue on her beige three hundred dollar suit, she mightn't have been as freaked. But as it turned out, fate had delivered both a cruel blow to her suit and to Angel - for the look she shot him was *soooo* much worse than the ones Aaron had been giving him since the start of the night. His mouth suddenly dry, Angel swallowed to get the moisture back into it, the demons body finally falling to the floor, followed by its head and a meaty *THWACK*
"Uhm..." Angel looked desperately at Cordelia, begging her with his eyes to help him. He knew from experience what Cordelia's bad moods were like. He didn't want to find out how twenty years had cultivated her mothers. And here, it appeared again. His son knew that Angel was in more trouble than he'd faced before and the chubby little arms shot up, "Daaa..." He giggled, pointing to himself, then his father. "Dadda..." He babbled.
Angel grinned, vowing to buy his son the whole damned toy store if that's what he wanted for saving him from the wrath of Cordelia's mother. He took his son from an almost grinning Cordelia who had just about had enough of this little visit. "We'll take Connor to bed and then we'll talk." Said Cordelia, stubbornly, looking at her parents.
"But..."
"NO buts." Said Cordelia, frowning. "Just wait here."
Sidling up to Wesley, Alara smiled, "So, what's your name again?"
Oh, bloody hell... Thought Wesley, sighing as he watched Cordelia and Angel escaping. Did this woman EVER give up?
* * * * *
"ANGEL, PLEASE!"
"Cordelia, you know I can't..."
"Angel... I'll do anything... Just... Please?"
Angel shook his head, placing Connor into his crib and chuckling, "You know that if I could, I would but... Cordelia, they're your parents..."
"No, they're not! You've seen them... They're demons! They *have* to be! I mean... Look at their outfits! Would I look as good coming from THOSE two?"
"I can't kill your parents, no matter how much I want to..."
Cordelia batted her eyelids and looked up at him, "Please, I'll never ask you to do it again..."
"There won't be an again..." He laughed, wondering if she was teasing or whether she was actually serious.
"They're driving me crazy!" Said Cordelia, "And don't tell me you didn't think about killing them yourself, because you know you did."
Connor gurgled from his cot, wondering when exactly his Mommy was going to smile, a non smiling Mommy just wasn't fun round here, especially when... Ah, there it was!
How could she help it? Connor was looking up at her and burbling and she couldn't help but smile.
Now to crack Daddy. He blew a raspberry. Angel laughed. Now Connor could fall asleep content. Gently, their son's eyes drifted shut and Cordelia smiled, pressing her finger to her lips and grinning at Angel. Creeping outside so as not to wake him (not before putting the baby monitor on of course), Cordelia looked at Angel, "Is there any way I can convince you?" She asked, playfully... Or was that hopefully?
A warm feeling ran through her as Angel placed his hands on her shoulders and he leaned forward... Slowly... Mmmm, lips of Angel. She thought with a little smile to herself feeling his lips brush gently across... HER FOREHEAD???
Looking up, puzzled, Cordelia saw he was smiling down at her, his eyes soft. "We'll deal with your parents. We'll send them home and then we'll get onto the important stuff."
She was mad... Well, for about a second anyway, making her think he was going to kiss her like that! But Cordelia just smiled, "Important stuff?"
"Well, there's our son..." He said softly.
Cordelia nodded, "Okay, let's send 'em packing... And soon... 'Kay?"
He took her hand, giving it a light squeeze, before kissing her forehead lightly, again. "We've faced bigger than this, remember?"
"Really, like what?" Asked Cordelia, teasingly.
"Well, there's the scores of vampires and demons. And then there's the apocalypse. And your visions... Bigger. Badder."
"Bigger and badder than my father?" Cordelia's lips tugged upwards in a smile, and she watched him gulp a little.
"Yeah," He almost squeaked, "Bigger, badder."
"Okay... I believe you." She smiled, before leading him downstairs. Her parents stood at the bottom of the stairs, looking up worriedly at Cordelia. "Honey, we think perhaps it's time you came home with us." Said Alara, warily, watching Angel like a hawk.
"What? Why?" Cordelia was puzzled, what had happened now???
"Vampires, demons? Honey, we always knew you were high-maintenance but we never knew you were crazy..." When Alara spoke, it was like she'd spoke to that Minion, slow, pronouncing every single word.
"You think I'm crazy now?" Squeaked Cordelia, staring at her parents. Her gaze drifted away to... The baby monitor! Damnit! Those things were so... So... STUPID! And intrusive!
"Well there's always been signs... The clothes for a start."
Angel could see the look on Cordelia's face. A cross between anger, confusion, laughter and surprise. A burst of laughter emanated from his lips and Aaron glared at him, "You think my child being crazy is funny?"
Angel gulped again...
~Part: 5~
"I'm not crazy!" The indignant voice rang throughout the hotel, indignant, angry, all kinds of humiliated and... To put it bluntly? Pissed. Her eyes narrowed, she glared at her parents - Angel thought he'd seen her pissed? He'd seen nothing...
"Only a crazy person would say that." Said Alara, nodding to her husband who was continuing to glare at Angel, a scowl evident on his face, "I knew we should have had her checked sooner..."
"CHECKED FOR WHAT?" Cordelia yelled, her eyes blazing. Fred, Gunn and Wesley (wisely) maintained their distance from the angry young woman before them, not even Angel was safe, one wrong word and Cordelia could explode.
"Well, there was that Harris boy for a start, and then there was..."
"Xander?" Cordelia stopped for a second, "What's wrong with Xander?" Did I really just say that?
"Well he was a little... Lower than your usual status, honey." Said Alara, gently, totally unaware that she was treading on very thin ice.
"Usual status?" Cordelia was puzzled, okay, so she did *have* a usual status back then, popular, rich and usually jocks but the fact that her Mom had gone past the 'Ooh, nice boy' stage was pretty much amazing.
"Well, yes, the popular boys. The good looking ones."
"Xander wasn't ugly!" She bit, noticing Angel's scowl. That hadn't exactly been exactly what Angel had wanted to hear. Okay, so even he'd admit that Xander wasn't on the particularly ugly crew but... He was a dork! But then... Cordelia called him a dork which introduced all sorts of problems for the 245 year old completely and utterly jealous vampire.
"You've got to admit that you were too good for him." The words were out of Angel's mouth before he could stop them and Cordelia gasped, turning round to glare at him. "ANGEL!" She yelled, "Don't YOU start!"
"What?" He asked, puzzled, "I'm just saying." He'd paid her a compliment! She WAS too good for Xander. She was his Cordelia, that meant that every single guy that had even had a crush on Cordelia, she was too good for. Except maybe Doyle. And that little thing with Welsey - 'cause they were his friends and Xander was...
"Well don't JUST SAY!" Said Cordelia, frowning, "Just..."
"Now, honey - Angel's only looking out for your best interests..." Said Alara, sweetly, detracting herself from Wesley's side and going to stand beside Angel.
"But... But you've just..." Cordelia sputtered, "He got demon goo on your clothes!" Clutching at straws much?
Alara smiled and waved her hand, "Oh, this old thing? Doesn't matter..."
THIS OLD THING? Cordelia's thoughts slammed into her head quicker than a vision, This old thing? She wouldn't hold Connor in case he got baby drool on her and now it's 'this old thing'?
"And then there was that weird girl..." Continued Alara. "You remember the one? She tried to attack you with a wooden stick."
If she hadn't been so pissed, Cordelia might have been impressed. While her mother was bed bound with Epstein Barr syndrome, she'd actually been listening to her daughter? Definitely a first for Alara Chase.
"Her name was Buffy." Said Cordelia, through gritted teeth.
"And what kind of a name is that?"
"MOM!" Too late. She'd exploded. "SHUT UP! God, will you let people get a word in edgeways?"
Angel raised an eyebrow at this, Cordelia was usually the dominant speaker while he was the one who sat back and waited. Something he'd learnd to do well over the course of almost 250 years.
"We'll book you an appointment with Dr. Truman just as soon as we get you back home." Said her father, "Perhaps it's best that you say your goodbyes now."
"No! I'm NOT crazy!" Said Cordelia, folding her arms indignantly across her chest. "And I'm not going anywhere! Angel, show them."
Both of Angel's treacherous eyebrows shot up in surprise. The vampire was famed for keeping his cool (most of the time) for not wigging (yeah, right) for not getting panicked over the least little thing (uh-huh) but this, he panicked over. "Show them what?" He asked, fear and trepidation marring his voice. He didn't want to do anything that would upset her father - after all, he was... Large and... Glowery... In pink.
"Your 'grrrr' face." Arching her fingers in the typical 'grrrr face' fashion, she'd never looked more adorable. It still didn't mean he was going to do what she asked though. And risk the wrath of her father? No chance.
"What 'grrrr' face?" He asked, coyly.
He recognised the signs almost immediately. A foot tapped against the hardwood floor, her arms slid across her chest (Where he *so* wasn't looking) and Cordelia arched one perfectly shaped eyebrow. "What Grrr Face?" She asked, her voice dangerously low. "Do you really want me to explain?"
Okay, let's assess the situation. Thought Angel, in a rare calm moment in the face of his biggest fear, bigger than Cordelia's Mother and Father combined. Cordelia's Wrath. Never fun. Briefly, he recalled the first time he'd felt her anger towards him. After his 'beige period' he'd never felt more helpless, more unable to do something when she was hurt or angry. He decided that Cordelia at this point was more dangerous - she could, after all, effectively kill him more than her parents could.
Sighing, Angel glanced at her father, letting his game face slide on. Ha ha! Victory for the lowly vampire! Cordelia's mother was stunned into silence. Her father however was less... Mute...
"WHAT IN THE HOLY HELL IS THAT?"
"HE is Angel." Said Cordelia, "You still think I'm crazy? He's a vampire. With a soul. He helps people." Alara slid bonelessly to the floor, after all this was just too much to take in one night, her daughter crazy and a man she'd considered to be an eligible bachelor a vampire with a very severe case of the bumpies. "B-but... Tom Cruise didn't look like that!" Said Alara, timidly.
They thought CORDELIA was crazy??? Fred watched from where she stood, mildly amused. Cordelia was battling against her parents, when Angel had leapt in with a comment that could only be described as jealousy - if anything, at least they were sorting out their little 'ballet' episodes.
"You can take the 'grrrr' face off now, son." When Aaron spoke, his voice was a degree softer (something which shocked Angel to no end). "He doesn't bite?"
Cordelia smiled for the first time since her parents had actually got here, "No Dad, he doesn't bite. He doesn't feed from humans, he helps people. That's where I fit in." She smiled. "I'm Vision Girl - the Higher Powers if you like... Show me when people need helping, how Angel can help them. That was how I floated before..."
"They make you float?"
Deciding that one (or three) shocks in one day was quite enough for her parents (even though the mischevious streak in the Seer wanted to shock them more) - Cordelia nodded, "Yeah, they make me float."
"Mr. Chase," Stepping forward, Wesley glanced at the pair, "I don't think I need to remind you that this... What Angel is, should remain between you and your wife only... If this were to get out it could spell danger for Connor..."
"I'm sure Tom Cruise didn't have those bumpy things... Was Tom Cruise a vampire, really?" Asked Alara, still shocked to the point where she was babbling incoherently. Well, actually, just shocked - the incoherent babbling seemed almost like her regular speech patterns.
"No, Mom, Tom Cruise wasn't a vampire. He goes out in the day-time, remember?" Asked Cordelia, softly. As much as her Mom pissed her off, this was still a big deal and... Oh, holy hell, her father really wasn't asking that, was he?
"Angel, can I talk to you alone for a second?"
Oh God... HE WAS! Cordelia watched as Angel gulped and nodded, "Sure."
"Use my office..." Offered Wesley, glancing at Cordelia after Angel and Aaron had retreated to the office, "Perhaps now you should discuss with your mother the... Finer points of Angel being a vampire?"
"Nope." Said Cordelia, "I'm taking Mom upstairs to meet her Grandson."
~Part: 6~
Cordelia and her mother climbed the stairs to Connor's room, Alara watching Cordelia carefully. In a rare tender moment, Alara reached out and touched her daughter's arm, "You're happy, aren't you?" She asked, gently.
Nodding, the brunette met her mother's eyes, "I am." Said Cordelia, smiling. She was. Truly happy. She had Angel, her friends, Connor - everything she wanted.
"What about..."
Alara faltered, making Cordelia look up, "What about what?"
"Money?"
Her face fell into a frown. Tender moment over with, Cordelia shook her head, "Money's not everything, Mom." She said quietly. "It's not like I need it."
"But he provides for you?"
"Who, Angel? Mom, we haven't even admitted we like each other yet."
"But you know he likes you and he knows you like him?"
"Yeah..." Said Cordelia gently, "We were plotting your demise up here..." She teased, "Trying to get rid of you."
"We heard." Said Alara, making Cordelia gasp. They'd HEARD? She'd been plotting their deaths and everything!
"Oh..." Cordelia blushed, shaking her head, "I didn't mean that..."
"I'm kidding, honey. You're so strung up sometimes, lighten up!"
Creeping inside Connor's room, Cordelia pressed a finger to her lips, "Sshhh, he's asleep." She said softly. The two women tiptoed to the cot where Connor lay, his eyes pressing lightly on his cheeks, a finger stuffed in his mouth, the other clutching a stuffed penguin.
"He's so cute." Said Alara, watching as her daughter preened, slightly. She was definitely proud of her son. "Cordelia, what did Angel mean, you and he didn't..."
"We didn't." Cordelia watched Connor, her finger trailing lightly down his soft cheek. "Connor's mine in every way but one. Biologically. I still feel it though, that bond with him. He calls me Mom, and it feels like he's mine. He's the closest I'll ever get."
"Why?" Alara was puzzled, her daughter (minus the bad dress sense) was in every sense of the word, beautiful.
"Because I love Angel." Said Cordelia softly, "And Connor is like the equivalent to the Golden Child or something. Angel can't... Or shouldn't have been able to have kids... Connor's a miracle."
Alara smiled, gently, "Yeah, your miracle."
* * * * *
Downstairs, a completely paranoid Angel had moved the baby monitor to the office, should anything happen and he'd heard everything...
Aaron frowned, having heard everything too, and glanced at Angel, "Perhaps it's time we went through some things... I have certain rules when it comes to my daughter."
Angel gulped...
* * * * *
Cordelia and her Mom sat at the top of the stairs, staring down into the lobby of the Hyperion, "So, you're happy?" Asked Alara, for about the seventh time.
"Yes," Replied Cordelia, "I'm happy. Really happy."
"Good... Now you've just got to wait for Angel to pass your father's test..."
Cordelia raised an eyebrow, "Test?"
"Oh, sweetie, don't tell me you forget the RULES!"
* * * * *
"Rule number four, You do not TOUCH my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off my daughter's body, I will remove them."
Angel sat there, looking agape at Mr. Chase. They'd been through four of his rules and already three of them had included a shot gun, a shovel and a grave. Okay, so this *shouldn't* scare him but... Well, it did.
"Rule number five," He continued, "I'm aware that fashions have changed since my day, even for a vampire. Right now, the current trend is for boys of your age..."
Angel raised his eyebrow, Boys? He was beginning to wonder which planet Mr. Chase actually came from...
"...To wear their trousers so loosely they appear to be falling off their hips. I am prepared to compromise. You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do NOT come off during your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely to your waist."
Angel shook his head, staring agape at a man who, in years to come, COULD be his father-in-law.
"Number six. I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilising a 'barrier method' of some kind can kill you. Let me make this simpler. When it comes to sex with my daughter, I am the barrier and I will kill you."
So, moving swiftly on then? Thought Angel, his mouth hanging open...
"Next rule. I have no doubt you are a popular young man, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry."
He felt like he'd walked into the Mafia and Cordelia's father was the one holding the gun... Not that a gun could kill him...
"Eight, do not lie to me. I may appear to be a pot-bellied, balding, middle-aged, dim-witted-has-been. But! On issues that involve my ONLY child, I am the all-knowing, all-seeing, merciless God of the universe. If I ask where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel and nine acres behind the house, do not trifle with me."
Okay, so NOW it was time to intervene, "Mr. Chase, Cordelia and I..."
"If ever you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful like changing the oil in my car?"
"Mr. Chase!" Said Angel, frowning, "If you'd just listen for..."
"Son, I have one more rule... Be afraid. Be *very* afraid. I can spot a lie a mile off, it takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper. When my inner possessiveness begins acting up, voices in my head tell me it's time to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. When you pull into the driveway, you should exit the car with both hands in sight..."
"DADDY!" The shrill voice of his daughter at the door to the office made Angel's spirits lighten for the vampire knew that on the wall hung many, many items of weaponry that truly were detrimental to his health and wouldn't just hurt beyond belief. Aaron's gaze shot guiltily up to his daughter, "Yes, sweetie?" He asked, meekly.
"Don't yes sweetie me!" Said the brunette, "I'm 20 years old! You're still treating me like I'm 15!"
"I was just..."
"Just what?" Asked Cordelia, her voice dangerously low... "I'm 20 years old... Not a child - and for your information, Angel has already had his hands on me!"
Angel gulped, stepping behind Cordelia as Aaron's eyes narrowed...
"Cordy, maybe that wasn't the best thing to..."
"He's... Touched... You..." Asked Aaron, pronouncing each and every word...
Angel gulped... Again...
~Part: 7~
It was finally over. Tears had been cried... Blood had been spilled... And Cordelia's parents were truly gone. And Angel brooded... For he couldn't believe what he'd done. Alara had mourned for her husband, while Cordelia had met the 'tragedy' with a quiet acceptance, being strong for her mother's sake. It had started out so simply. Sure, there'd been times when he'd wanted to strangle Cordelia's father but had never wanted this to happen... It had started with a hammer... And ended in tragedy...
*Earlier that Day*
"You've had your hands on MY daughter?"
Angel could almost hear Cordelia's 'pfffft' in his head, could see the rolling of the eyes as she shook her head. "Dad, you have to calm down," Said the brunette, frowning, "It was pretty much a given that Angel would've had his hands on me if Connor was my son. Unless of course he was the immaculate conception..." Her eyes flashed mischeivously at Angel as she said this, for Connor, while he had been created from Angel getting groiny with his skanky blonde mother, he wasn't really supposed to be here... So, see? The immaculate conception.
"...Which I was," She continued, "But if I remember rightly, that's what you told my Grandfather to escape death by his shotgun, right?"
"Don't get smart with me, young lady..." Growled her father, glaring at Angel.
"Don't call me young lady! I'm not 15 years old anymore!" Yelled Cordelia, standing protectively in front of Angel, her hands on her hips. This, struck Angel, as wrong. Cordelia, *his* Cordelia was protecting HIM from her father. Wasn't he a champion? He'd faced minions from Hell by the thousand and he was scared of a man who vaguely represented the only roadblock other than the curse in his relationship with Cordelia. Well, Angel was a champion and he wasn't going to let a man who wore pink shirts (through no fault of his own) spoil his relationship with Cordelia.
"Okay, Mr. Chase, I think this has gone far enough..." Started Angel.
It was then, that he turned. Angel noticed that, for a man of his age (which okay, wasn't very old) he was pretty damned scary. He could only have been in his early 40's, but it was evident in a family like Cordelia's, that looks were everything. Maintaining that youthful edge, even if, for her parents, it was achieved by a surgical knife was all important. So this obviously meant that Mr. Chase, concerned with keeping his looks, would only be confident with weapons of some description. Shotguns... Shovels...
"OWWW!"
Or the first that he'd just shoved unequivocally into Angel's face.
"DAD!" Yelled Cordelia.
"Aaron!" . . . Alara's cry screeched through the hotel and it was then that Mr. Chase broke into a run. Angel maintained his dignity (by refraining from shrieking like a girl) and started running too. It wasn't that Mr. Chase scared him, not in the least. It was just that if a brawl started, could Angel honestly stop himself from... Well, putting it bluntly, killing the man? Yes, of course, that was the reason...
"DAD!" Yelled Cordelia again, something akin to a petulant teenager this time...
"Mr. Chase, I can explain..."
"What the two of you went upstairs and she fell onto your penis?!"
"DAD! Overreact much?" Cordelia was sick and tired of all the yelling, she was getting hoarse... And besides, ewww, hadn't she put up with the scary notion of sex that one time those sick noises had been coming from her parents bedroom? "I'm a grown woman!"
"That still doesn't mean he can have his hands all over you!" He barked.
Angel, being a vampire, had the advantage of vampiric speed and agility on his side... Most of the time, anyway. Lately, Cordelia noted, when he'd gone into full dork mode, his stealth advantage had been slipping - he no longer had the edge of sneaking up on her without her knowing he was there. Cordelia went forward as Angel slipped on something and went his length across the room into a door. However, the thing that he'd slipped on (which had provided hours of fun for Connor) skidded backwards, right into her father's path.
The hammer in question was a large, soft toy squeaky thing that Gunn had won for his nephew when he'd taken Fred to the fayre over at LaFayette park. He'd cursed his decision, however, only twenty minutes later, when the squeak and the constant banging against his head had drove him, quite literally, nuts. He'd wanted to pop the damned thing - but to slaps from both Cordelia and Fred, Charles Gunn was forced to endure his fate... At being slapped around by a one year old with a toy hammer.
"Daddy!"
"AARON!"
"Mr. Chase!"
<<< Crunch >>>
At first, it sounded like a demon... Crushing its prey between its fingertips, but when Angel turned? The fate he was about to experience was worse, much, much worse...
* * * * *
"Doctor, can we see him?" Asked Alara, sniffling loudly - she'd deliberately kept her eyes away from Angel at *all* times. Even those times when he held her grandson back at the hotel. Now, they stood at the hospital, Angel, Cordelia and Alara. Fred, Gunn and Wesley had agreed to keep watch over the baby while they waited... It had seemed like a lifetime in which Angel brooded, Cordelia sat there in reserved silence and every so often a fresh burst of sobs would escape Alara's lips.
"He's asked to see his family..." Nodded the Doctor, "Including his... Son in law?" The way the Doctor hesitated made Angel look up. Okay so the words had obviously come out of Aaron's mouth himself but the way the Doctor said them? Angel had a feeling it spelled uh and most certainly oh...
He wasn't even aware they'd shuffled forward until he heard the "Oh, honey..." From Alara's mouth. There on the bed, a mask covering his face, lay Aaron, barely able to breathe. Angel shuffled again, glancing at Cordelia who was successfully keeping her eyes away from his too - this was bad, very bad.
"Son, we need to talk..." He rasped, breathlessly.
Oh God, not another one of Cordelia's father's TALKS! Angel frowned and simply nodded, "Yes, Sir."
"First of all... That place is like a damned death trap waiting to happen, you saw what happened to me back there. You're bringing my Grandson up in that?"
Cordelia frowned, "Daddy, Connor is a child. He plays with things, just because you don't watch where you're going doesn't mean the place is a death trap. Besides, exactly how old are you? Chasing Angel round the hotel like it's some kind of cat and mouse game!"
Angel looked at Cordelia, surprised. He'd thought she was pissed at him.
"And another thing, I'm 20 years old, if I want to sleep with every man in LA, I will, it's none of your business. As it so happens, the only man I ever want to sleep with is standing right next to me but if we do, he'll turn evil and kill us all so I'm thinking maybe... Hmmm... Not."
Angel frowned, "Hey!"
"Well, it's true. Doesn't mean I love you any less, does it?" She asked.
*She loves me?* Thought Angel, his mouth falling open accordingly.
"B-but look at my nose!" Said Aaron, "How can I go in for the office photographs looking like this?" He was a man who prided himself on his looks - but, fact being, he'd been the one chasing Angel round the hotel, he'd tripped over the damned hammer and it was him who'd flown into the stairs head first. Angel at least, even in his less than stealthy mannerisms, had managed to hit a door and not break his nose. "Look at my nose!" He said again for effect.
"Dad, it'll heal." Said Cordelia, "The doctor said the swelling should go down in a few weeks, you're going to be fine. You can even go HOME tonight!"
"WEEKS? WEEKS?!! But... But..."
"For God's sake it's only a bunch of photographs!" Said Cordelia, shaking her head. "For the past three hours I've heard you call me crazy, lay down a bunch of stupid rules to my 250 year old boyfriend, think a demon was from the projects and ask why Tom Cruise didn't look like Angel when he went all 'Grrrr'. There's only so much a girl can take, even if she is from Sunnydale!"
"What are you saying?" Asked her father, his voice muffled under the protective mask.
"I'm saying... GO AWAY! Be normal parents! Only come to visit me and piss me off on Christmas, and birthdays... I'm saying... I love you but for the love of God you have to leave before *I* kill you, never mind Angel!"
"B-but..." Started Aaron, frowning, "I'm not letting him..."
Smiling sweetly, Cordelia stepped forward, "Dad. My loving, wonderful father. I fear I should warn you. When Angel and I get home tonight, there'll be a LOT of touching. In fact, Angel's hands will go places no other mans have been before... And there's not a thing you can do about it. If you try, which I'm sure your not stupid enough to do, because after all, you had me and I'm pretty darned astute when it comes to certain things... To jeopardise any of my happies with Angel tonight? I'll do a lot worse than the stairs did. I'm a demon, I know stuff..." She nodded. "You don't wanna piss me off..."
Aaron paled... And Alara snickered behind her hand, coming over to kiss her daughter on the forehead, "So that's a date, for Christmas then?"
Cordelia breathed a sigh of relief, "As long as you're not cooking Mom, I think I can handle it." She said with a grin, then leaned over, kissing her father gently, "Anything else to say Daddy?"
He scowled looked at Angel, "Remember Rule Number 7?"
Oh God, what was this? Pop Quiz time? Was that the one with the shotgun... Or the Golden Gate bridge or...
"It still stands." Said Aaron firmly, "If you make my daughter cry, I will in turn make YOU cry."
Relaxing considerably, Angel took Cordelia's hand in his, "I promise, Mr. Chase. I won't ever make your daughter cry." With another kiss to both her parents from Cordelia, they left... Walking in silence until Cordelia looked up at him, "Y'know, no one likes a kiss ass."
"What?" Taken aback by her comment, Angel half-turned to look at his beautiful, wilful friend as they neared the hotel, "I'm not a kiss ass!" He intoned, indignantly.
"Oh you SO are! You told them, for one, that Xander wasn't up to my usual standard and then you won't show them your Grrr face for fear of what they'll think of you!" She laughed, "You're a kiss ass!"
"Cordelia, I'd like to not have your parents wanting me dead every time we visit," Said Angel, rationally.
"Angel, my father could hand pick me a guy who's stalwart and true from a bunch of guys that he handpicked because of their morals or some other such crap and still want to kill him every time they met. You're no different. Well, you are..."
"How's that?"
"Because I happen to have the hots for you," With that, Cordelia ran up the steps into the Hyperion and up the stairs past a bemused Wesley and Lorne, sitting playing a card game. Angel followed to a point from Lorne and found Cordelia standing over the crib, a silly, sweet grin on her face. "Look."
Angel stepped forward and smiled, Connor's fist shoved in his mouth as his little chest rose and fell with each breath he took. "Cordelia?"
"Yeah?"
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure..."
"About this Christmas and birthday thing... Can we... Be out of the country when they come around?"
Cordelia started to laugh, "Are you kidding me? My Dad would have his shotgun ready quicker than you could blink..."
"Well I had to at least try..."
Cordelia turned and kissed him, grinning, "I'll think about it," She whispered, "Promise..." With that, the two fell on the bed, kissing and laughing accordingly.
And from the crib, a child who was supposed to be asleep opened one sleepy eye, grinning...
Mom happy + Dad Happy = Nice
Oh yeah, that boy was a genius.
End.