Evil Inside

Author: claudia6913

Rating: NC-17 (language)

Pairing: none

Summary:  Angel's daily fight within.

Disclaimer: Joss owns the characters.  I own the poem.  It's an original creation by me.

Distribution: Any one I post to on lists can have it.  Otherwise e-mail me.

Feedback:  Yes, please.  Love it.  ghoztstarz@yahoo.com

Author's Notes:  The poem belongs to me.  I wrote it years ago.  lol It's a look into the internal struggle of Angel/(us).

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
 
 
 

I'm going mad.  Angelus is tormenting me with images of his days. Did I let him out?  Did I let my guard down?  Is this just another one of his games?  I don't know!  How do you fight yourself?  I can't just rip him out.  He's there, a part of me.  Always.

~Fight me
Your evil inside
Turn around
Look yourself in the face~

I can't let him out again.  He will destroy everyone I care about. Oh my God.  What have I done?  No, it's not real.  He's playing with me.  I think.  This is maddening.  I know.  I'll find the shackles. Confine myself.  I can't let him out.  I just can't.

~See the pain
Feel the madness
Blink, see if it's real
Tormenting yourself~

He wants to play.  I don't want him to.  I live with this everyday. One of these day's he might break me.  I can't do it.  I have to fight him back.  Put him in his cell within me.  Lock the door. Throw away the key.  He didn't get out.  Ha.  I knew he was playing a game.

~Fight me
Your evil inside
Turn around
Look yourself in the face~

No, I will not do this.  Not again.  Hell was better then sitting back watching him go about killing people and tormenting the ones I love.  I have to get away from here.  I can't help them if I kill them.  I mean if he kills them.  I mean...shit!  Angelus!  How dare you?  Where are you?  Why are you laughing?

~Tears form in the corner of your eye
No where to run
No where to hide
Scared yet?
You should be
No everyday you get to meet yourself~

"Angel?" Buffy asked.  "Are you ok?"

I look around at all the faces staring at me.  Fuck.  I did it again.  No, he did it again.

"Yeah, fine," I say to the group.  Angelus just laughs at me.  Shut up Angelus.  You're not out.

~Fight me
Your evil inside
Turn around
Look yourself in the face~

The End

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