In Bits and Pieces

Author: Aileen E.

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~Part: 11~

Willow sat on the bed with her legs stretched out in front of her. She tapped the keys on her laptop while watching the vampire hunched down in the corner of the room (watched him watching her) at the same time she tried to balance the laptop and the open book on her lap. She shifted uncomfortably and set the book aside, placing the computer on the other side of her and curling her legs. She was thirsty, she was always thirsty lately. Her own saliva scraped like sandpaper along the raw lining of her throat when she swallowed.

"That's it. I'm pretty sure I got it," she said to Spike, not really expecting an answer from him. The vampire had been sulky and quiet since she had started locking the door to her room at night and had refused to allow him to touch her.

She believed she had located the right spell, orders had been placed for the harder to find ingredients and she had decided on the most advantageous location for the casting. All that remained to do was wait for the ingredients to arrive and do the spell that would seal the portal once and for all. It had been four days since the demon attack and there had been no further incidents. Maybe she had been wrong, maybe the demon had not been sent by Glory and that meant that they had a little more time. In any case, she wasn't taking any chances.

She started to stand from the bed but paused when she saw the vampire rise to his feet.

"I'm just going to the kitchen, need something to drink," she explained.

The vampire's constant demand for her company was starting to grate on her already taut nerves. It had been two days since she had last been to see Rack, and her mood was teetering between sullenness and nervous agitation. As she walked into the kitchen, she tried to ignore Spike following closely behind her. She took two glasses out of the cupboard and poured a generous amount of vodka into each one, handing one to the vampire and bringing the other to her lips.

Spike stared nervously at her as he took the glass. "Willow, I..."

Willow turned around slowly, trying to maintain her calm disposition as she braced herself to have the same discussion they'd had at least ten times in half as many days.

"Spike, I ... What happened that night wasn't, it wasn't ..." Damn it! "It wasn't right and it shouldn't happen, again," she interrupted him.

"I didn't please you." The words were softly spoken and were more a conviction than a question.

"No! I mean, yes. Well, yes ... but that's not the point. The point is that it was wrong." And she needed to keep repeating that because with each passing day and with each successive visit to Rack's den, the fine line between right and wrong continued to blur in her mind. And here I was all this time, thinking that Spike was the crazy one, she thought with derision as she took a sip from her glass.

Apparently, Spike wasn't ready to drop the issue so easily this time. "Is it because of her. Because of the woman in the picture, the one you won't talk about?"

Willow felt as if he had slapped her across the face. It is because I'm a lesbian still mourning the death of my lover, a lover that I stood by and watched a demon rip to shreds while I did nothing. It is because I practically handed you over to a hell goddess to torture and you should hate me for it. It is because you don't really want me and this compulsion to please me is a symptom of your insanity. And I would explain all this to you if I wasn't so damn tired of thinking about it myself.

"Spike, shut up, you don't know what you're talking about," she ground out between clenched teeth as she pushed past him and stormed off to her room.

A few minutes later she heard Spike walk past her door and head for the bathroom. She heard the sound of the shower and sighed in relief. He had apparently decided to grant her a reprieve.

She laid face up on her bed and quietly started to chant. As small bursts of energy crackled through her body she began to relax. It was getting harder to crawl into that small void in her soul where the guilt and the pain that were her constant companion couldn't follow her. Soon, she would need to go back to Rack and have him reopen the chasm, but for now, she was fairly certain she could find it on her own. She smiled languidly as she felt all of her concerns fade away, to be replaced by the ecstasy of oblivion.

Willow was vaguely aware when the sound of running water stopped. When her dimmed senses told her that he was in the room, watching her, she struggled to break through the dizzying fog that had enveloped her mind. Her eyelids fluttered open and she frowned at the tingle of desire that coursed through her body when she looked up at him. He wore only a towel around his waist, hanging perilously low on his hips. His hair was wet and tussled, and droplets of water clung to his pale skin. He stepped more fully into the room and she caught a whiff of the fresh scent of soap on his body.

"Hey, Spikey," she chirped, crooking a finger and motioning for him to step closer.

When he did, she sat up and whispered in his ear, "Were you a naughty boy in the shower?"

She giggled at the startled look on his face that answered her question and slapped him playfully on the chest. "I'm just playing with you, Spike. I don't care what you do in the shower. Although," she glanced down at the obvious erection barely concealed by the towel, "I don't think you did a very good job."

She laughed again and stretched out on the bed. "Gods, this feels great!" His eyes were on her, she could feel them roaming curiously over her body.

"What you looking at?" She asked when he had been staring at her for a while.

Spike's frown deepened. "Trying to figure out what you're doing."

Willow smiled. "Just an itsy, bitsy, tiny spell."

When Spike didn't comment, Willow opened her eyes once again to look at him through half closed, droopy lids. He was standing in the same spot, next to the bed.

Willow breathed deeply, basking in the wave of pleasure and desire building inside her. There were at least a dozen reasons why she shouldn't be considering what she was. She could have enumerated them all earlier, but at that moment, she could not think of a one. She wanted Spike. She didn't love him, not in the carnal sense, but the animalistic attraction was undeniable. The longer she looked at him, the more she studied his face, the more she wanted him. Need poured through her insides like quicksilver - thick, heavy and toxic.

Spike's nostrils flared, a small gesture that was not lost to Willow. She spread her legs invitingly. "Wanna get closer?"

The vampire climbed on the bed slowly and settled between her splayed thighs. Willow noticed that he was being careful not to touch her. "Closer," she hissed. The blond head disappeared from her view as the vampire leaned forward, his face hovering over her crotch. She lifted her hips and ground her moist juncture against the vampire's face, the contact causing the rough seam of her jeans to rub against her sensitive clit. A hiss of pleasure escaped her lips, answered by his moan. When her hips rested once more on the bed, his mouth followed her. Soft lips and blunt teeth ground eagerly against the fabric of her pants, as if the vampire was trying to chew his way through the fabric to reach her core. Panting harshly, Willow clenched her fists around the bed-sheet and thrust harshly against his face until she felt an orgasm rip through her.

Spike sat back on his hunches, breathing heavily and Willow smiled wickedly at him. The tremors of her first orgasm had not yet abated when she felt the desire flare anew inside her.

"You want to fuck me, don't you?"

The vampire nodded his head eagerly, but made no move toward her. Willow realized that he was waiting for permission from her, and the realization heightened her arousal. It was power to control a demon, no different than the power she felt when she used magic to bend nature to her will, and it was a rush. She briefly wondered what he would do if she denied him, but the point was moot considering the need screaming inside her. She rose to her knees and moved closer to him, until her mouth was hovering in front of his parted lips.

"Is that what you think about when you touch yourself, sticking your nasty cock in my pussy?" She whispered.

Spike squeezed his eyes shut, and Willow saw his body tremble.

"It's hard, isn't it? Having to hold back, trying to bury all those nasty little thoughts deep down inside and be a good little boy? Pretend that you don't feel, don't think, don't want, don't need? Just smile pleasantly and say 'sure, no problem' when inside all you want to do is let loose and rip the fucking world apart?" Willow didn't realize that what had started as a teasing whisper had turned into a full blown rant until she saw the vampire cringe away from her. She struggled to regain control.

A sickeningly sweet smile twisted her lips. "What's the matter, Spikey? For weeks you've been sniffing after my cunt, and now all you can do is stand there and cringe?"

"Please." The word left his lips sounding more like a groan of pain than actual speech.

Willow stood from the bed and began to undress, the tremor in her hands giving away her urgency. She watched, mesmerized as the vampire removed the towel from his waist, revealing his hard cock. He laid down passively on the bed and watched through lowered lids as Willow undressed.

It figures that a male would have the woman do all the work, Willow thought as she positioned herself astride Spike's hips.

"It's been a while since I've had a cock. Not my usual, you know. So try and make it worth my while," she told Spike as she positioned him at her entrance, before impaling herself on his shaft in one fell swoop.

She screamed as she felt his cold length stretch her, her voice drowned out by Spike's own scream. With masochistic glee, Willow pulled back until only the head of Spike's cock remained inside her and swooped back down, driving him even further inside her. She rode him at a quick pace, leaning forward so that her clit rubbed against his shaft with each thrust, bringing herself to orgasm quickly and collapsing on top of his chest.

As the haze of pleasure lifted from Willow's mind, she realized that the vampire had remained immobile and silent, except for his initial scream, the entire time she rode him. She heaved herself off him and slumped on the bed next to him. "Gee, Spike, I always thought you'd be a little more lively in the sack!"

Her eyes traveled the length of his body and she frowned when they settled on his erection. Hum, I guess what I've heard about vampiric endurance is true, she thought with a quirk of her brow as an idea started to form in her head. "Give me a second, lover," she told Spike before she started to chant in a low voice.

When she was done chanting she turned her face toward the vampire who laid motionless on the bed, studying her curiously.

"A little something I picked up from Rack, a strengthening spell. I figured I needed to build up my strength if we're gonna go another round," she explained, grinning mischievously.

Spike rose to his knees, his eyes never leaving her face as he positioned himself between her thighs.

"That's it, baby. Give it to me hard," she encouraged.

She gasped in surprise when he slammed into her, the impetus of his thrust nearly driving her into the mattress. I guess the stuff about vampires' strength is also true. Willow hoped that the spell would hold as Spike lifted her legs and began to pound savagely into her, otherwise, she was certain that he would grind her bones into powder at the pace he was going. As it was, she could feel him tearing her flesh with his cock.

As the initial shock wore off, her desire started to build once more and she reached out to him with desperate hands, trying to pull him impossibly closer to her. "Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me hard," she panted harshly in his ear.

She felt certain that he wasn't holding anything back and still it was not enough. An idea flourished in her mind. It was something she had only heard whispered about by the watchers, something that was only vaguely alluded to in those precious books that Giles always tried unsuccessfully to keep hidden from her, something that she had always wondered about.

She swallowed hard, trying to find her voice. "Bite me! Spike, bite me. Drink from me!"

She tried to pull his head down to her neck, but the vampire pulled away from her, his body freezing above hers.

"I can't. Please, I can't," he pleaded.

His reluctance was frustrating. So far he had denied her nothing. "Spike, in case you didn't get the memo, the chip is history - you can bite me!"

The vampire shook his head frantically. "No, no, no, please!"

She thought she heard him mumble something about bad and about her pulling his teeth out. Willow frowned. Something about his panic, the urgent misery in his voice, told her that something wasn't right. That something was, in fact, terribly wrong with their situation. Desperately, she pushed the thought back from her mind.

"Just fucking do it!" She nearly growled at him.

His face changed above her, stormy blue eyes turned piercing yellow as he resumed his thrusts with renewed vigor. She felt sharp fangs slice through her breast. It was painful and exciting, searing and invigorating all at once. Willow threw her head back, digging her nails into his shoulders and screaming her orgasm as she felt his cold semen fill her.

Clarity returned slowly and Willow became aware of the hard body under her. Before she opened her eyes, she realized that she was laying on top of Spike, and she wondered vaguely when their positions had changed. Her fingers palpated the sticky wound on her chest and she winced. The body beneath her shifted, bringing Willow to full awareness. She was in bed with Spike. The thought was strangely incomprehensible to her. Her memories were intact; it was her reasoning that had shifted. A sideways glance at the vampire's face only served to compound her fears. The glint of tears in his eyes, made incongruous by his demonic features, caused her stomach to churn.

She was coming down from the spell, hard, and all the warning signals that had been invisible before - his passivity, his quiet desperation, his barely suppressed rage when finally granted permission to act on his impulses, his confusion at her request - pounded at her state of consciousness like a hammer drill. It was all too much and too fast. With a strangled cry she ripped herself from the bed, pausing only long enough to cover her nakedness before tearing away into the night. It came as no surprise when the vampire did not try to stop her.

~Part: 12~

Wind swept through Willow's hair and electricity crackled through her body as she hovered near the ceiling of Rack's den. She was peacefully floating in a calm ocean of colors, cradled by the wind and lulled by the sound of the waves. No pain or remorse could reach her there.

A sudden crash intruded into her tranquility and she tried to dispel it. The sound of voices, angry voices, distant and unrecognizable, reached her ears and she frowned. She tried to look around her, but all she could see was the psychedelic ocean and sky. Gravity suddenly pulled her and she was falling, hitting the ground face first. Ow.

The voices were clear now and very nearby.

"Do you understand? And if I ever catch you near her or this town again, I will not be so generous!"

"Hey, man. No problem. She is special, but not that special! You on the other hand... Are you sure you don't want a taste of what I have to offer?"

There was loud growl, followed by another loud crash and then silence. Willow tried to open her eyes and look around. Everything was blurry. Being yanked so violently from her trance must have confused her senses; her mind was having trouble catching up with her physical reality. She felt a strong hand on her shoulder and heard a soft voice close to her ear.

"Willow, are you alright, can you hear me?"

She frowned. The voice was familiar but impossible.

"Angel, is that you?" She whispered before darkness closed in around her and she slipped into unconsciousness.

~*~

Willow awoke to a throbbing headache and a rolling wave of nausea. It took her a moment to realize where she was. Home. Home is good. She stumbled out of bed and slowly made her way to the bathroom. Shower. Shower is good too. After starting the shower, Willow stripped and mechanically climbed under the spray of hot water. As the water pounded away at her tense muscles, Willow tried to gather her thoughts. She distinctly remembered going to Rack's and something had happened. Angel! Angel had happened. She rolled her neck, lulled by the sound and feel of the hot water on her skin. For some reason she felt as if she was covered with a year's worth of dirt, layer and layers of it that no amount of soap and water would be able to wash away.

She again wondered how she had gotten home. Angel had been at Rack's, an altercation, angry voices, hitting the ground. Then Angel must have brought her home. She frowned. If Angel had brought her home and she had been unconscious, then Angel must still be in the house some place - Angel ... with Spike. Spike!

Snapping out of her stupor, Willow jumped from the shower. She hastily yanked her bathrobe from the hook behind the door and threw it on, tying the cloth belt as she ran down the hallway. She threw Spike's bedroom door open and her eyes frantically scanned the empty room. Terrible thoughts ran trough her head. As she ran through the house she scanned the floor carefully, not wanting to admit to herself that what she was really looking for was a small mound of dust that could have at one point being a vampire. Running past the empty living room, she quickly surveyed the equally deserted kitchen and was about to head for the basement when she heard a voice coming from the top of the stairs.

"You're awake! How are you feeling?"

She turned around and saw Angel casually descending the stairs, looking very much at home in her house. He wore silk pajamas with the top unbuttoned and his hair was disheveled, as if he had just gotten out of bed.

She frowned at his appearance. "Angel, how long have you been here?"

"I got into town two days ago. I'm sorry, Willow, I should have been here sooner."

Willow glanced nervously toward the stairs, afraid to ask about Spike, not thinking that she wanted to hear how the confused vampire had attacked Angel and he'd had to kill him.

"Why? Why did you come?"

Angel motioned for Willow to follow him into the kitchen. "Willow, it's been two weeks since I talked to you. You said you would call, and you never did."

"I've been busy," Willow retorted defensively.

Angel poured a glass of orange juice and placed it on the table, motioning for Willow to take a seat. "I've been calling both the house and the store for the past week, no one answered."

"Like I said, I've been busy ... and I told Spike not to answer the phone." She watched Angel's face carefully, studying his reaction to the mention of the other vampire.

He merely gave her a stern look that told her he was losing patience with her. "I saw what you were busy doing."

Willow winced at the accusation. "Angel, my recollections are a little, well, scattered. What exactly happened?"

He sat at the table across from her, a mug of warm blood in his hand. "When I couldn't get you on the phone, I knew something was wrong. I came to the house first and found Spike. He eventually told me that you had been acting strangely and going out at night to see someone named Rack about something to do with magic." Angel paused for a moment. "Gave me a hell of fight first though," he added with a chuckle. "You didn't tell me he didn't remember who I was. After I got the information from Spike, I asked around; it wasn't hard to figure out what was happening or find the place."

Willow felt her stomach churn and bile began to rise in her throat. "Angel, you didn't ...?"

Angel's eyes narrowed. "Didn't what?"

Willow's words were barely above a whisper. "Hurt him. Spike, I mean."

Angel shrugged. "Had to beat him down some; he attacked me."

She felt as if she was going to be sick. "Angel, where is Spike?"

"He is fine. He's upstairs in the room."

Willow shook her head. "I checked his room, he's not in there."

Angel shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "He is in the other room."

"But he is ok, right?"

Angel nodded. "Yes, he is fine, and he's been asking about you, a lot, constantly actually."

Relief washed over the woman and she allowed her body to slouch in the chair. "I can't see him, not yet. If you say that he's fine, I'll take your word for it."

Angel reached a hand across the table and placed it over hers. "Willow, he wants to see you, he needs you. But if you don't want him around, I'll take him back to L.A. with me."

Willow shook her head, staring dejectedly at her lap. As frightened as she was by the thought of facing the vampire, the notion of Spike leaving with Angel, leaving her alone again, terrified her. But all things considered, maybe it would be for the best. "Angel, it's not that I don't want him around. You don't understand."

He looked at her seriously. "Then tell me what's going on."

Willow went through the whole story, and this time she didn't hold anything back from Angel, except for her sexual relationship with Spike, which she suspected that Angel already somehow knew about. When she concluded the story, she looked up at Angel, trying to gage his reaction, ashamed of all she had done. "Angel, I let him down. He trusted me, he was depending on me to help him and instead I ..."

Angle scoffed, shaking his head in disbelief. "Willow, what you've done for Spike is remarkable. If you did anything wrong, it was not asking for help when things got to be too much for you, and I'm notorious for doing that, so I can't hold it against you." Angel smiled at her, but Willow still wasn't convinced. "Spike is hard to handle under any circumstances. Frankly, while I was driving down here, I was expecting to find one or both of you dead."

Willow stared at Angel in horror. "What? I don't think Spike would go as far as to kill me, and I know I couldn't kill him!"

"The only thing that kept me from coming any sooner was the fact that I thought Spike couldn't hurt you because of the chip. If I had known that the chip was no longer active..."

Willow wrung her hands nervously on her lap. "I know; that's why I didn't tell you."

Angel furrowed his brow. "Willow, why didn't you want me to come help you with Spike?"

Willow scrunched her face guiltily. "Because you said I should kill him. I was afraid that you would hurt him."

An expression of disbelief came over the vampire's face. "Willow, I don't expect you to understand this because you're human. But maybe, if you and Spike are going to have a future together, it is time that you learned some things. Whatever else has happened between Spike and me, he is my responsibility. Drusilla may have sired him, but neither one of them would exist without me. If Spike is threatening someone's life, you're right, I will not hesitate to kill him. But if he's hurt, I will not turn him away if there's anything I can do to help him. Can you understand that?"

Willow nodded uncertainly, her perceptive nature indicating to her that Angel had left at least a hundred things unsaid.

Angel stood from his chair. "Come on, I want you to see something," he said gently, stretching a hand out to her.

Willow stood and followed him reluctantly. Just before they reached the stairs, Willow thought to ask something. "Angel, what happened to Rack?"

"He will not be doing business in this town anymore," Angel answered with a finality that sent a shiver down Willow's spine and discouraged her from asking anything further.

The first thing that Willow noticed when she and Angel entered the bedroom was that the room was dark. She reached for the light switch and was surprised when Angel stopped her.

"Angel, you don't understand. Spike, he becomes confused when he is in the dark." Willow whispered, not really wanting to let Angel know that Spike was in actuality terrified of the dark. But Angel refused to allow her to turn on a light.

"Spike is not a child; he is a vampire and you need to stop coddling him."

Willow frowned and was about to protest that she didn't coddle Spike, that she took care of him, when she saw Angel leave her side and walk toward the bed. He stretched out on top of the comforter, bending his head to whisper words she could not hear to the lump on the other side that she assumed was Spike. The blond's head emerged from under the blankets, but he did not look at her. He seemed to have eyes only for the dark haired vampire who continued to whisper softly to him while running his large fingers through the other's blond, wild curls. After a moment, Spike buried his head in Angel's neck and Willow noticed the look of ecstasy on the older vampire's face. She hesitated, torn between watching the strangely tender scene playing out in front of her and wondering if what Angel was doing was right or if she should interfere.

One of Angel's hands came to rest on Spike's naked chest and traveled downward, pushing down the covers in its path, down to the waist before dipping lower. Willow became agitated, what he was doing couldn't be right.

"Get away from him!" Willow screamed, anger and panic building up in her chest.

Angel's head snapped up, but Spike ignored her.

"Willow, this isn't what it looks like," Angel tried to explain as he gently pushed the other vampire away from him.

Tears began to well in Willow's eyes, although she wasn't sure why she was crying. "Just, just leave him alone," she stammered.

Spike turned his face toward her and she saw a reassuring smile on his blood stained lips. "It's ok, Pet, he knows what he is doing."

A myriad of thoughts raced through Willow's mind as she tried to connect ideas with the surreal scene. Maybe she was still at Rack's and this wasn't really happening, but was an illusory world that she had created. Or she had actually lost her mind, and common, everyday things no longer made sense to her, although she couldn't see how two vampires fondling each other in a bedroom of her house could be a common, every day occurrence. Angel must have seen the confusion in her face, because he rushed to explain.

"I've been feeding him for the past twenty-four hours, while you slept. He would have eventually healed on his own, but drinking the blood from one of his vampiric ancestors can greatly speed up the process. If Drusilla was here, she would have done the same, and far more effectively since she is his sire."

Willow frowned, mulling the information. "Ok, I can buy that, but what's with the ... the hand, thing?"

Angel chuckled and Spike moved closer to him, nuzzling his chest.

She saw Angel shrug. "Just comfort. Spike likes to be touched."

Willow felt a slight stab of jealousy in her gut. She had been driving herself crazy trying to take care of Spike and make him better, and all Angel had to do was waltz in, climb in bed with him, feed him a few times and Spike was all better. Furthermore, she saw no sign of the guarded behavior that Spike had directed towards her aimed at Angel. Spike looked perfectly calm and content. It doesn't seem fair, she thought as she felt warm tears slide down her face.

"Although I think he would much rather have you do the touching," Angel added.

Willow heard Spike chuckle his agreement.

Angel frowned and Willow felt his eyes carefully studying her face. "Willow, what's wrong? I'm not hurting him, you do understand that, don't you?"

Willow nodded. "I'm just, I don't know what's wrong with me. I feel so awful and ... maybe it will be best if you take Spike with you when you leave."

Spike's voice startled her. "He can try dragging me, kicking and screaming, but I guarantee it won't be pretty."

She was amazed at how strong and clear his voice sounded, how much like the old Spike. "Does he...?" Willow paused, realizing that she had been talking to Angel as if Spike wasn't there, a habit from growing accustomed to ignoring the blond vampire's often quirky behavior over the past weeks. She turned her face toward Spike. "Do you remember everything now?"

He shook his head. "Not everything, just bits and pieces of things. People, places, but not everything."

Angel interjected. "The memories will come with time. He has over a century worth of memories to recollect, but he remembers enough to function independently."

Willow's stomach tightened as she wondered just how much he remembered, about Buffy, about herself and Tara, the time he had spent with a chip imbedded in his brain, that fateful night at the tower ... and what his reaction to the newfound knowledge would be. She fidgeted nervously, unsure what to do or say next.

"You look tired, Willow. Why don't you come here and keep Spike company while I get some sleep. You kids have worn me out," Angle suggested.

Angel and Spike moved to make room on the bed for her and Willow frowned. Her conscience must be have been healing nicely, because it was telling her that it was wrong to just climb into bed with two vampires. Spike patted the empty spot on the bed next to him. "It's alright, Pet," he cooed.

Willow approached the bed hesitantly, a tentative smile on her lips. "Spike, I, about everything... I just need to tell you ... we really have to talk."

He shook his head. "Shhh, not now. Sleep now."

Willow sighed and climbed under the covers he held up for her, the crowded bed making for a snug fit. Turning toward her, he took her hand and placed it over his chest. "Please touch me," he whispered.

Willow smiled and ran her small hand gently over the smooth skin. Angel was apparently already sleeping and Spike closed his eyes. With the absence of breath, Willow could not tell whether or not he was asleep. As she drew small circles with her fingers over his chest and arms, Willow felt her eyes drift close. Exhaustion overcame her and she was soon asleep.

~Part: 13~

Willow realized that she was alone in the bedroom; maybe that was what had awakened her. That idea was quickly supplanted by a rolling wave of nausea, a splitting headache and her whole body trembling. She was sick. Not sick with remorse, although that was there, but physically ill. Pushing the blankets aside, she tried to stand up and her body was wracked with violent shivers. The thought of impending death looming closely in the horizon fleetingly crossed her mind.

She slowly made her way to the bathroom where she emptied the nonexistent contents of her stomach, washed her face, brushed her teeth and ran her fingers through her hair, trying to arrange her tresses into a semblance of order. Getting dressed seemed like an unattainable goal that would probably exhaust her last reserve of energy, so she straightened her robe and went in search of the vampires.

She found Spike sitting on the livingroom couch, intently staring at the picture of Buffy she had placed on the coffee table over a week earlier.

"You remember her now?" She asked softly, curling up on a chair that was as far away from the vampire as she could get without making it obvious that she was avoiding being near him.

"Yeah. She was something, wasn't she?" He answered with a low, rueful chuckle, his eyes never leaving the photograph of the young, blond woman sitting on a park bench under a tree, the bright sun shining down on her.

"Yes, she was," Willow agreed sadly.

Silence ensued for the next few minutes while Willow quietly studied the vampire who was staring at the photograph in his hand. She wondered what he was thinking, what he was feeling about all that had happened, but she was afraid to ask. He suddenly placed the framed photograph on the table, next to the others and looked up at her.

"She should be here too, you know."

Willow frowned, not sure to whom he was referring.

"Tara, her photo should be up here with the others. She was one of you, one of the group."

Willow formed a silent 'o' with her lips. "Maybe." She was too tired and too sick to say more.

Spike frowned and studied her intently. "You don't look right, Pet. What's wrong?"

Willow pouted, wallowing in her self-pity and loathing it at the same time.

"I feel sick, really sick. And hallow inside, like my insides were spilt from my body and put back bunched up and all wrong. Do you know what I mean?"

Spike raised an eyebrow. "I happen to have first hand experience with that process, and believe me, luv, that's not what you're feeling." He must have seen the shocked expression on her face because he added, "Oh, you didn't mean that literally! Yeah, I know what you mean."

Willow winced, not understanding how he could speak so casually, almost flippantly, about his experiences in hell. All she could grasp was that he was trying to make her feel better by downplaying what had happened to him, except it wasn't working. It was only making her feel more guilty, and strangely envious of the fact that he could put up such a brave front when all she could manage to do was remain mostly conscious.

She was about to tell him as much when she felt her stomach roll and her throat constrict. She barely made it to the small half-bathroom down the hall before she collapsed on the cold tile floor, retching and spewing bile from her mouth. Too weak to resist, she allowed Spike to lift her in his arms when she had finished vomiting, and carry her to her room. He deposited her none too gently on the bed before walking back out of the room.

"You stay here, I'm going to get Angel."

Willow didn't answer, but could have assured him that there was no danger of her going anywhere anytime soon.

The following days would become a blur of nausea, dizziness, headaches, fussing vampires and watered down soup in the woman's mind. Every time she opened her eyes she would see Spike hovering over her. Angel ordered that she wasn't to leave the bedroom; Spike thought it would be best if she didn't leave her bed. When she explained to both of them that she would occasionally need to get up to use the bathroom, Spike insisted on carrying her there and back.

By the third day her stomach was feeling better, but there was a scratchy, tingling feeling all over her body. It was like tiny spiders crawling inside her skin and it made Willow want to jump out of her own body. Angel entered the room as she sat propped against pillows, eating still another bowl of canned chicken soup. If nothing else, the food that the vampires had been feeding her was enough incentive for her to get well and back on her feet.

A small half-smile twisted Angel's lips as he took a seat on the edge of the bed. "You look better. How are you feeling?"

Willow grimaced. "I'm better, but my skin feels all itchy and crawly. Now that I'm stronger, maybe I could do a spell to get rid of this ... whatever it is."

"No!"

Willow was startled by the stern tone of Angel's voice. She watched him take a deep breath and speak again, this time more softly.

"Willow, it's the magic that's doing this to you. You have to stop."

"Oh, I know I can't go back to Rack's, and maybe I should really take it easy for a while, but I'm not talking about a big, dangerous spell..."

Angel interrupted her protests. "You don't understand. This has nothing to do with Rack; it has to do with you."

Willow could not understand what Angel meant, but she didn't like the serious expression on his face. "Me? What do you mean?"

"It was your need for power that led you to Rack in the first place. You need to learn that everything and everyone has its limits, even you, and that not everything can be solved with magic."

Willow wasn't convinced, and she resented the vampire's sagely tone. "You don't understand, Angel. I needed to make my magic stronger; I have to seal the portal all the way or demons will continue to seep through it."

"Willow, there will be no more magic - never - understand?"

Willow shook her head. "Why? I don't understand." Her voice sounded strangely child-like, even to her own ears.

"Because the wounds will heal, but there will always be a scar through your soul. That hint of darkness, that itch just beneath the surface that will beg to be scratched, but if you do, the wound will reopen and it will swallow you. There will always be demons to fight and portals to open or close, and your power will never be enough, you will always need - want more. You got off easy with Rack; there are things a lot darker and more dangerous out there, and it will only be a matter of time before you go looking for one of them."

Willow wanted to argue with him, to tell him that he was wrong, that it wasn't like that. But her body told her otherwise. She could feel the craving building inside her, tearing at her flesh from the inside out, screaming to be fed. Angel was right, once she gave in, it would never be enough, which only left one question unanswered. Willow hesitated for a moment before speaking.

"Angel, what about the portal? As long as it is open, there's a chance that Glory is going to come after Spike and me. If I don't close the fissure, we may as well hang a sign next to it that says 'Welcome, come in and kill us!'"

Angel looked as if he wanted to protest but couldn't find a valid argument. "I'll stick around for a while and we'll find a way to permanently seal the portal without risking you. Get some rest now."

Willow watched him stand up and walk toward the door. "All I've done lately is rest. I can't stand to be in this bed for another minute..." Or eating another bowl of soup. "I think I'll get up and take a shower, maybe go downstairs for a little while."

"Fine. Just come down when you're ready," Angel said over his shoulder as he walked out of the room.

Willow followed him out and had almost made it to the bathroom when she was intercepted by Spike. She startled at the sudden appearance of the vampire. In the past weeks she had grown accustomed to Spike being underfoot everywhere she went, but this time it was different. He had seemingly burst out of nowhere and jumped in front of her, rather than meekly and quietly falling into step behind her like he used to do.

"Hello, Red. I see you're feeling better."

She fidgeted nervously under his scrutiny. "Uh, yeah. Much better. I was just going to take a shower, change my clothes, you know." Willow self-consciously wrapped her arms around herself, imagining what she must look like after three days of being sick and in bed.

"Need some help?"

Her eyes shot up at the suspicious offer, but she relaxed when she didn't see any hint of lasciviousness in the vampire's eyes, only genuine concern. "No, I'm fine, really," she answered nervously.

She was both relieved and strangely disappointed when Spike didn't question her further; he simply shrugged and walked around her.

"I'll be downstairs then. Yell if you need me," she heard him say as he walked away.

Willow remained in the hallway for a moment before continuing to the bathroom, disconcerted by the vampire's attitude. It was possible that he was angry with her for the things she had said and done while he was incapacitated. Although, if her recollections served her right, Spike was usually a lot more expressive when he was angry, it wasn't like him to just give her the cold shoulder. It wasn't until she was almost done with her shower that the answer came to her. Spike wasn't angry with her, he was just being Spike, his former too cool to care self! Willow was genuinely happy for the vampire, even if in the back of her mind she harbored the suspicion that now that he was almost well, Spike would start to become restless and may even decide to move on soon. There wasn't anything tying him down to Sunnydale anymore. On the contrary, she couldn't blame him if he decided to leave the town, along with the memories of the time he had spent there, behind.

Reluctantly, Willow finished her shower and got dressed. Even if Spike's condition had improved, there were still some decisions to be made. As she descended the stairs into the living room, she saw Spike sitting on the couch, watching television with a bored expression on his face. She didn't see Angel anywhere.

"Where is Angel?"

"Poof is upstairs, been talking on the bloody phone for the past hour," Spike answered without looking at her.

Looking around the room, Willow's eyes settled on two boxes neatly stacked on top of a chair.

"What are those?" She asked as she walked toward the packages.

"I was hoping you were gonna tell me. Came yesterday by messenger; they are for you."

"It's what I ordered for the spell!" Willow exclaimed, rushing forward and ripping open one of the boxes.

She pulled out a medium size, pink crystal. She moved the crystal around letting the light catch and reflect off its jagged edges. "It's beautiful, isn't it?"

Spike shrugged. "It's a shiny rock. What you gonna do with it, throw it at Glory if she comes after us?"

Willow didn't miss the uncomfortable hitch in Spike's voice when he mentioned Glory's name, but she chose to ignore it. "Of course not! Placed at a specific location and set at an exact angle, there's enough energy in this crystal to seal the fissure in the portal once it is released. Once the portal is sealed, we won't have to worry about Glory."

Spike eyed the crystal warily. "What's in the other box?"

"Those are the ingredients for the spell that will unleash the energy of the crystal."

"Pet, I don't think you should be playing with that stuff. Not after what happened."

Spike let his voice trail and Willow shifted uncomfortably. They were both trying to avoid certain subjects and Willow wondered if for the same reasons - if they were each afraid to hear what the other had to say. She placed the crystal carefully back in the box.

"It doesn't matter now. Angel said that I can't use magic anymore."

"Yeah, he mentioned something like that." Spike turned his eyes back to the t.v. set.

Willow took a seat on the chair across from Spike, thinking of the best way to broach the subject she was dreading discussing - the sudden, intimate turn their relationship had taken. She decided that skirting around the topic would only make matters worst, she decided to dive right in.

"I didn't think that things would turn out the way they did," she blurted out.

He glanced at her without turning his head. "It happened, let's leave it at that."

But Willow just couldn't leave it at that. She had a lot of explaining to do, and if not to Spike then to whom? "What I did was wrong, I know that now. I think I knew it all along, I just couldn't; it didn't seem to matter then..."

She was surprised when Spike chuckled. "Demon here, Red, don't need to explain to me the concept of knowing right from wrong but not caring."

Willow leaned forward in her chair, needing to make him understand. "That's the thing, Spike. I'm not a demon, I'm not even evil. I just wanted to ... I guess I just wanted to escape for a while."

Spike was looking at her strangely, a little smile curling his upper lip, his eyes twinkling. It was a familiar expression, but it made her feel uncomfortable. He stood from the couch and walked slowly toward her.

"So you are saying you didn't enjoy the feeling of power? To be free, if only for a little while, of that nagging conscience that's always holding you back?"

He was standing in front of her now, leaning forward, he planted both his hands on the arms of the chair on each side of her. Willow looked into his eyes and what she saw there unnerved her - it was amusement. Either he wasn't understanding what she was trying to convey, or he understood more than she was giving him credit for.

"Yes, of course I did. But it is still wrong and I should, well, I think what I'm trying to say is that I owe you an apology."

Spike raised an eyebrow in mock surprise. "An apology? What, no penance? No self-flagellation, no blood sacrifice?" His expression was once again serious, and he lowered his voice down to a whisper. "You're trying to tell me that even now you don't get wet thinking about it, huh? Having me beneath you, hard as a rock and helpless while you use my cock for your pleasure. Feeling it slide in and out of you, stretching you, rubbing against your hard little clit? What else did you think about while I was fucking you? Did you think about whipping me, fucking me up the ass with a strap-on, keeping me tied to your bed for you to ride whenever you wanted to, your very own demon fuck-toy? "

Willow knew that she was staring at him with her mouth hanging open. His words horrified her, more so because as she listened to them she could feel her body responding, her breath quickening, her nipples tightening, moisture seeping from her core.

Spike pushed away from the chair and stared down at her with a knowing expression. "Never tell a demon you're sorry if you don't mean it, Red." He paused for a moment, seeming to consider his own words. "Come to think of it, never tell a demon you're sorry; he won't give a fuck!"

Trepidation and horror sent a shiver down Willow's spine. She stared agape at the vampire, trying to decide if his softly spoken words were a threat. Did he mean he didn't care that she was sorry or that he didn't care what she had done to him, or both? Before she could ask him, she heard Angel coming down the stairs.

"I've been talking to some people in L.A., trying to find out information about the portal and how to close it. It might be a couple of days before I hear anything back ..." He stopped in front of Spike and Willow, looking suspiciously at one and then the other.

"Is there something wrong?" He asked of neither in particular.

Spike shrugged nonchalantly. "No, Red and I were just talking. She was just telling me how sorry she was for ... everything that happened."

Willow almost sighed in relief. For a moment, she had feared that Spike was about to go into a detailed account of exactly for what she was apologizing. It just seemed like something the vampire would do if he wanted to get back at her. She felt Angel's eyes on her.

"Willow?"

"Uh, no there's nothing wrong. I just don't ... I don't feel so well. Maybe I should go back to bed."

Willow was about to make a hasty retreat when she heard a sharp knock on the door, a second before it burst open. She was surprised to see a wild-eyed and disheveled Xander rush into the room.

"Where is she? Willow! Are you alright?"

Willow jumped to her feet and stepped forward to greet her friend who was suddenly frozen on the spot. "Xander! I'm fine. What are you doing here?" She noticed that Xander was no longer looking at her.

"Funny, I was about to ask the same thing about him." He responded, pointing directly at Spike.

~Part: 14~

The tension in the room was palpable. Willow wrung her hands nervously, instinctively placing herself between Xander and Spike. As calmly as possible, she told Xander how she had performed a spell and rescued Spike from the hell dimension to which Glory had taken him.

"You did what? Why? Is this what's going on, what you've been hiding from me?" He asked, looking genuinely hurt.

Uncertainty replaced the elation she had felt at seeing her old friend. She had planned to tell Xander about Spike, eventually, when the time was right, when she found the right words. But not like this, not in front of Spike and not yet. Willow took a deep breath to steady her nerves. The young man looked stunned, his eyes still fixed on the blond vampire in front of him. He slowly turned his eyes toward Willow when she spoke.

"I brought him back because it was my fault that Glory took him in the first place, and what do you mean 'hiding' from you? I wasn't hiding anything! I just, I just didn't tell you." She glanced at Xander from beneath lowered lids, her lips pursed into a pout and her brow furrowed in an expression of contrition. It was a well practiced look, the only feminine guile that she had allowed herself over the years and reserved only for the man she considered her oldest and closest friend.

Xander ran his fingers nervously though his hair, but an easy smile that said 'I'm on to you' curled his lips. "I'm sorry, Will," he offered as he open his arms to her.

Willow stepped into his embrace, relieved that Xander had relented, but knowing that the battle was far from over.

"I was worried about you. I couldn't get you on the phone, and when Angel finally answered ... I knew if Angel was here, whatever was going on had to be bad. Although I have to admit, I never imagined this," he concluded, glancing once again at Spike over Willow's shoulder.

Willow pulled back slightly to look at him. "Spike is here because I want him to be, Xander. Wait, you talked to Angel?"

"Yes. Xander called a couple of days ago. I was going to mention it," Angel offered sheepishly.

"Yeah, I'm sure you were. You probably forgot, just like you forgot to mention anything about Spike being here," Xander retorted.

"I didn't think that it was my place to mention anything. I was going to have Willow give you a call when she felt better. Besides, I have the situation under control."

"Oh, so you admit this is a situation! Does Giles know about this?"

Willow groaned. So much for the explanations waiting until later. "Xander, why don't you come with me to the kitchen, I'll explain everything. We have a lot of catching up to do."

"Yeah, I would say so," he grumbled, but let Willow guide him into the kitchen, her arm entwined with his.

As she exited the living room, Willow chanced a furtive glance in Spike's direction. The vampire was standing with his legs slightly apart, his eyes boring not into Xander, but into her as she walked away.

Once inside the kitchen, Willow felt Xander relax and slowly let down his guard. They sat at the kitchen table and Willow reached across to hold Xander's hands in hers. "It is really good to see you."

"I've missed you too, Will, but I have to say, I don't understand what's going on here."

Willow hastened to explain to him everything that had transpired, from her search for a spell to bring Spike back, to her need to find a way to close the fissure in the portal and her consequent involvement with dark magic, again leaving out the more sordid details. When she had concluded her breathless account, Xander was staring at her with an incredulous look on his face.

"Let me see if I got all this. You spent time that you could have used on figuring out how to close the portal, looking for a spell to get Spike back. And now that you got him back, Glory is coming after you and you can't close the portal? Would it be too much to ask why you would do something like that?"

Anger began to flare inside the woman. Maybe it was too much to expect that others would understand her bond with Spike and her loyalty to him. She was probably the only one who had ever seen Spike as part of their group and not just an occasionally useful annoyance.

"Xander, I would have done the same thing for any of you. It could have been any of us up on the tower that night, it just happened to be Spike. Maybe you see him as expendable, but I don't." Willow was surprised to realize that her words were true. Yes, she had been lonely and had hoped that Spike was more of a help to her than he had been, but even if that wasn't the case, she would have done everything in her power to bring him back, as she would have done for any of her friends.

"There is a difference, Will. None of us are demons. He is, and I can't think of a more appropriate place for a demon than in hell."

Xander's words stung her, perhaps because somewhere in them, she could see a glimpse of truth that she was not ready to accept. She pushed away from the table and stood up, taking in big gulps of air in an effort to steady her nerves.

"Xander, I can't change what is already done. All I can do is try to make up for my mistakes and try to solve the problems that we still have. I could use some help doing that, but if you don't want to help, you're free to leave."

Xander shook his head. "You know I'll help in whatever I can. Haven't I always?"

Willow nodded. Even if Xander and she had not always seen things in the same light, whether she was braving her first day of school or deterring an apocalypse, he had always been there for her.

"You can have Dawnie's old room. I don't think Spike is using it anymore," she whispered before walking out of the kitchen. She needed time to sort through her thoughts and that was something she had to do on her own.

Several hours later, Willow stood on her front porch looking up at the starry sky, still no closer to finding any answers. She turned slightly when she felt Spike walk up to her.

"It's not safe out here, luv," he said softly.

"I was just thinking."

"Thinking about what?" He asked, lighting a cigarette and leaning against the wall of the house.

"I'm sorry about the things Xander said. I know you heard. Are you angry?"

She ventured a glance at him and saw that he looked genuinely baffled by her question.

"Why should I be angry? The moron has a point for once. I am a demon, maybe I do belong in hell."

Willow dismissed his words. She knew he was a demon and she wished everyone would stop pointing that fact out to her. "What I said before, about being sorry, I did mean it. I am sorry for everything that happened to you and I'm sorry for the things I did to you, but I'm not sorry that I brought you back."

She felt Spike move closer to her. Soft cool lips brushed against her neck as strong hands rested on her shoulders. She sank back against him, letting him comfort her for the moment.

"I'm not sorry you brought me back either," he said with a chuckle. His words left much unsaid, but Willow understood that they were his runabout way of saying thank you.

She tensed when his hands slid down to her waist and began to roam over her stomach, traveling over her ribs, his thumbs caressing the underside of her breasts. Apparently, Spike was not understanding the point of her apology. Their physical entanglement had been a result of her abuse of magic and his mental impairment. It was not something that could continue. She took a step away from him, trying to put some distance between her body and his roaming hands.

"Spike, this is wrong. I don't think this is the right time for this."

Willow saw the anger flare momentarily in his eyes and she shrank back. The last thing she wanted to do was continue to hurt him, but she didn't think that either one of them was ready for what he apparently wanted from her.

"Please don't be angry, I just think we've both been through a lot and we could use some time, to sort things through, you know."

He placed his arms around her again and Willow felt his hold tighten when she tried to move away.

"Not much to sort through, Pet. I want you and I know you want me. Pretty damn simple, it is. God, Red, I get so hard just from looking at you."

She could feel the evidence of his words pressing against her backside, making their situation all too clear. By her actions, she had opened the door to this kind of intimacy, and now he expected it to continue. Her brow furrowed in confusion.

"Spike, aren't you angry with me, about the way that I used you, about me betraying your trust?"

Spike shrugged. "Angel explained that you were under the influence of some dark mojo, not really your fault. Besides, I can think of a lot of worse ways to get used," he concluded in a low voice.

There was a sadness, a tone of resignation in his voice that tug at Willow's heart. So far, Spike had been putting up a strong front, but at that moment, when his defenses had slipped, he had sounded as vulnerable and confused as before Angel had arrived.

"Spike, that's not a valid excuse for what I did. I knowingly surrendered my will in exchange for a cheap thrill, and I should have known better." She turned around in his arms to look up at his face as she said the next words, carefully studying his reaction. "You deserve better than to be used just because I'm weak and scared of being alone. I wouldn't be a very good friend to you if I continued to do that."

She braced herself for his onslaught of anger and protests, but was surprised when she saw his expression soften.

"You're not weak and you're not alone, Pet. I'm right here, Peaches is just inside, and droopy boy is upstairs in bed."

"But eventually they will leave. Angel has his mission of redemption in L.A. and Xander has a new life away from here. They both hate this town. I didn't think either one of them would ever come back, not after all that happened here. And as you continue to get better, you'll realize you don't need me anymore, and you too will leave. If I gave into what you're asking from me, I know it would only be a way to try to keep you here," Willow whispered, embarrassed by her own confession, realizing how desperate she sounded despite her brave words.

Spike's hands slid down her arms to wrap around her waist, pulling her closer to him. "I'll stay, I won't leave you."

She wondered if he knew how much those words meant to her, how strongly she wanted to believe them. "Even if I don't, you know, give you what you want?"

Spike thought about it. His demon wanted to take her, to prove to her who was in charge, but the man in him wanted her in an all too different way, and he couldn't figure out if it was because of what Glory had done to him, or because he had lost everything that had once mattered to him and she was all he had left, or maybe because he just wanted her. Patience had never been his strong suit, but maybe the witch was right, maybe they both needed time to think through all that had happened and to figure out what they each really wanted. In a matter of speaking, he owed her, and for reasons he could not comprehend, part of him felt compelled to honor that debt. He sighed in resignation.

"Fine, if you think it's best, I can wait. But I don't want to share a room with the poof anymore. I think he is starting to get ideas about me."

Willow's eyes widened in shock, until she noticed the mischievous glint in his eyes. "Well, we can't have Angel seducing you and stealing you away from me, can we?" She asked with a mischievous grin of her own, quickly warming up to the joke and thankful for the opportunity to dissipate some of the tension between them.

She frowned as she remembered something. "Oh, wait! I gave your room to Xander and he's already asleep!"

She could have sworn she saw Spike pout as he gave her an almost genuine hurt look. "Well, I suppose, seeing as how you gave my room away, the least you can do is share yours with me."

Alarms went off in her mind at the idea, not sure if she was ready to trust Spike in such close proximity to her. He must have seen the uncertainty on her face. "Red, Peaches and Xander are only a couple of doors away, and I'm sure you still keep that bloody stake you like to carry around, somewhere near your bed. There's no way I can avoid becoming a pile of dust if I try anything; if you don't get me, one of the other two will."

Willow smiled, convinced by the truth of his words. "When you put it that way."

They sat down on the front steps of the house, Spike's arm wrapped loosely around her shoulders, her head leaning against his chest as she stared out into the night. For the first time in a very long time, Willow felt just a little bit less alone.

~Part: 15~

It was late afternoon when Willow and Spike awoke and made their way downstairs. True to his word, Spike had not made any advances toward her. It had been a long time since Willow had awoken with another body laying beside her on the bed, and she had to admit that it had felt good, even if that body wasn't breathing and felt a few degrees too cold. She ignored the curious looks of the man and the vampire sitting at the kitchen table when she and Spike entered the room.

"Hey, everyone! What did we miss?" She asked, taking a box of cereal out of the cupboard and pouring a generous amount into a bowl.

Willow saw Spike make his way to the fridge and pour himself a cup of pig's blood into one of the mugs she had marked BLOOD in bold, red letters, pleased to see that Spike remembered to use the correct mug. She didn't mind seeing him drink blood, but couldn't stomach to drink her coffee from a cup that had previously held animal blood. There was no doubt in Willow's mind that if Spike decided to stay, they could work a way to keep each other company without getting in each other's way.

Xander's voice drew her attention back to the other occupants of the room. "Let's see, you missed Angel calling just about everyone he knows, asking them how to close the damned portal and everyone telling him that they didn't have a fucking clue!"

"Nobody said that. They said that they needed time to find a way and that they would get back to me," Angel said, a hint of indignation in his voice.

"Exactly, which is another way of saying 'we don't have a fucking clue but we'll let you know if we figure it out, if Her Holy Bitchiness hasn't pureed your guts by then, that is.'"

Willow scowled at Xander. She was in a rare good mood and their conversation was starting to put a damper on her good spirits. "I have an idea! Since there's nothing new and all we can do is wait, why don't we all go out to the Bronze tonight?"

Xander stared at her agape. "Will, maybe you missed the part about dying painfully and horribly at the hands of a Hell Goddess."

Sighing, Willow took a seat on the table next to the others. "Xander, I have not forgotten about Glory, but we've been here before, remember? All we can do right now is wait. Besides, I've lived alone in this town for the past year and a half, and I'm still alive. Why should I be worried now, when I have two big-bad vampires and a certified member of the Scoobies with me?" When Xander didn't seem convinced, she continued. "Come on, Xander, it will be like old times. It's been ages since I've had any fun. Just this once?" She entreated.

"I'm a bit bored myself, could use a distraction. Do they still have those buffalo wings?" Spike asked.

"I don't know, it's been a while since I've been there. But if they have them, you can have some, my treat. What you say, Xander?"

"You're right, Will. From what Angel has told me, there's not much else we can do except sit around and wait. I think, in a way, I have missed this town. It might be good to go out and visit the old haunts."

Willow smiled brightly at her friend, growing more excited about the idea of going out into town as a group. After all the time she had spent alone, it was a strange feeling to have friends around with whom to go out, and she planned to take full advantage of the time they had together. She didn't even want to think about the possibility that she would soon be alone again; Spike had said that he would stay with her and she had chosen to believe him.

"What about you, Angel, are you in?"

Angel's eyes shifted between her and Spike. She knew that he was pondering her sudden change in mood and what role, if any, Spike had played in it. "No, I'll stay here and make a few more phone calls."

Willow shook her head. "No, you'll just stay here and be all broody! Besides, I may need you, in case we run into some trouble."

She smiled inwardly when Angel gave in; she knew that the vampire was averse to anything that resembled fun, but the chance to protect a helpless woman in distress was something he couldn't refuse.

As soon as the sun settled, the four of them piled into Xander's car and headed for the Bronze. It was still early when they arrived, but there were already a few people milling outside the club. The increase in demonic activity over the past year had made a dent in the town's population, but those who lived in the hell mouth were used to ignoring such gruesome realities and going on about their business.

More people showed up as the hour grew later, and by midnight the club was smokey and crowded. Willow and Xander danced, Angel had confined himself to a corner table where he could conduct his brooding unobtrusively, while Spike consumed several helpings of buffalo wings accompanied by a few beers. A particularly fast paced song ended and Willow pulled Xander toward their table, needing to catch her breath.

She flopped down next to Spike, who sent a definitely hostile glare in Xander's direction. Willow realized that she had spent most of the night lavishing attention on her old friend while leaving the two vampires to their own devices.

She smiled endearingly at Spike. "Do you want to dance?"

Spike shifted in his chair, looking somewhat uncomfortable. "I don't dance," he mumbled under his breath.

Willow was in too good a mood, basking in the company of friends, to be deterred by his lack of enthusiasm. "What about a slow song? There should be one coming on soon."

Spike nodded curtly, after glancing sideways at Xander. Willow suspected that the only reason that he had agreed to dance with her was because he knew that if he didn't, Xander would. She patted his hand and turned to Angel. "Are you sure you don't want a beer?"

He smiled weakly at her. "I'm alright, Willow."

"Kind of hard to tell, with the whole woe thing you got going there, pal." Xander interjected.

Willow was about to admonish Xander for his rudeness when a scuffle near the entrance caught her attention, causing her to turn her head in the direction of the noise. The commotion increased as a few people started shouting, while others moved hurriedly away from the door. There were still too many people in the way for Willow to see what was happening.

Xander rose to his feet and looked over the crowd. "What's that?" She heard him whisper.

"What's what?" Willow asked, rising to her feet and straining her neck to see.

The crowd dispersed and she finally saw what had caused the disturbance. What appeared to be a large, dark cloud covered the entrance to the club, slowly moving further into the room. Her eyes narrowed as she studied the phantasmagoric apparition. The mass of vapor hovered a couple of inches above the floor, its shape and size undetermined since they seemed to change as the cloud expanded and contracted. It was a pestilent, dull, leaden-hued and dense cloud of smoke.

Blood drained from the woman's face, leaving her looking pale and feeling suddenly cold. Her heart beat increased until it was thundering in her ears. She vaguely heard Angel and Xander's voices somewhere nearby.

"What the fuck?" Angel asked.

"I'm there with you."

Images raced through Willow's mind, yet each one seemed to play in slow motion. She was in a dark and desolate graveyard. There was a squabble nearby as Buffy engaged a couple of vamps. A strong, distinct stench that made her wrinkle her nose in distaste assailed her nostrils. Turning around, she looked for the source of the smell. Tara was standing only a few feet away from her, a confused expression on her face.

As in a trance, Willow mouthed the words as she had said them that night. "Sweetie, do you smell that?" Just before she heard Tara scream and she watched her lover's arm been swallowed by the darkness that surrounded her. As Tara's body disappeared inch by inch into the darkness, Willow tried frantically to pull on her other arm. When that failed, she used magic, throwing everything she had at the faint, dark shape that by then seemed to envelope all of the woman's body except for her head. Her magic exhausted, and frozen in horror, Willow stood by and watched her girlfriend's terrified face, her mouth open in a silent scream, her eyes wide and disoriented, for what had seemed like hours, but had in actuality been only a few seconds, as she had been consumed by the same creature standing in the middle of the Bronze's dance floor.

The crowd started to recede slowly, moving toward the back of the bar, except for one man who slowly walked toward the cloud. He poked at the mass with a cue stick and Willow startled out of her stupor, screaming when the man disappeared inside the dense cloud. A moment latter, pandemonium ensued as the mass shifted and spewed forth a lump of bloody flesh that landed on the floor with a wet thud. As the crowd frantically ran, screaming, Willow stared stupefied at the body laying a few feet in front of her. It looked as if every bone in it had been pulverized and the skin torn to shreds by angry teeth!

"It's Glory," Spike said.

Willow whisked her head around to look at the vampire who was staring at the gaseous creature as if transfixed, his eyes wide, his mouth slack. She wasn't sure what he had meant by his comment. She touched his arm, not sure if she was trying to reassure him or seeking reassurance for herself. Spike began to drag her backward, away from the creature, his grip on her arms painfully strong. Willow winced and Angel intervened, prying Spike's hands from her arms and turning the stunned vampire around to look at him.

"Spike, what do you mean 'it's Glory'?"

Xander had moved closer to Willow and the woman could almost feel the tremor of his body as he spoke. "Listen, fangless, I don't know what kind of brain damage you've sustained, but that thing is not Glory!"

She nearly jumped into Xander's arms when Spike suddenly morphed into his demonic facade and turned around to confront the human. "I spent what felt like a bloody century locked up in a dark room with that thing. I don't know why I didn't catch on then, probably too fucked up in the head, but THAT," his finger pointed emphatically at the hovering cloud, "is fucking Glory!"

There was more frantic screaming from the crowd as the mass began to advance toward them, swallowing anyone that stood in its path and spitting them out in pretty much the same condition as the first man. Panicked and disoriented, Willow raised her hand, whispering a few words and sending a bolt of energy directly into it. Her magick seemed to have no effect against it and the cloud continued to advance. Her heart was pounding and her mouth dry with terror. Taking a gamble on Spike being right, she tried the one spell that she knew had worked on Glory in the past. She quickly began to chant under her breath.

"Thicken!" She shouted, and the cloud of smoke seemed to freeze, trembling slightly, but not moving.

"Go around it!" She yelled at everyone in the room and at no one in particular as she ran around the mass and out the door.

~Part: 16~

It was chaos outside the Bronze as people poured out onto the street in a panic. Willow was propelled by the throng and lost sight of Angel, Xander and Spike. She stood on the sidewalk, frantically looking around, knowing that the spell she had cast to slow down Glory wouldn't hold for long.

A hand touched her shoulder and she spun around, relieved to see Angel standing behind her.

"Angel, where is Xander? We need to get back to the house, now!"

"He went to get the car, should be here any second," Angel explained.

Willow noticed Spike standing next to Angel, still in his demon face and scanning the crowd with wild, amber eyes. "Spike, it's ok. I'm not going to let her get you, not this time."

The blond vampire slipped into his human face, which only made the terror in his expression more obvious.

"Over there, let's go!"

Xander was sitting in his car by the corner, unable to navigate safely through the crowd. The three ran toward the car, Willow pulling and Angel shoving a nearly catatonic Spike. Willow jumped in the front seat, while Angel ordered Spike into the back before jumping in after him. Willow looked back as Xander sped down the street, away from the club.

"Xander, you have to go faster, that spell is not going to slow her down for long."

"Trust me Will, I'm in as much a hurry to get away from that thing as the rest of you!" Xander shouted back.

Willow glanced at the accelerator pedal and it retracted until it was flush against the floor of the car, the speedometer reading slightly over one-hundred miles per hour.

"Willow, stop that! I'm driving!"

"Then drive faster!" She snapped back.

As they sped down the road, Willow continued to look out the rearview window, watching for any sign that Glory was following. She occasionally glanced at Spike who sat quietly next to Angel, his eyes fixed ahead and his face expressionless. She worried about his mental state at that moment, about what seeing Glory again had done to him, but she didn't have time to dwell on Spike's condition then, not if she was going to save all of them.

The car pulled into the driveway with a screech, and the occupants immediately jumped out, running toward the house. Once everyone was inside, Willow slammed the door shut. Spike went to sit on the couch, holding his bowed head in his hands. Willow kneeled next to Spike. Angel paced furiously across the room while Xander stood by the door breathing heavily.

"Oh, yeah, just a typical night of fun and slaughter on the Hell Mouth, just like old times! And did I say earlier that I missed this? Scratch that! I so don't miss this place! Which doesn't really matter now since we are all going to die!"

"Xander, shut up!" Willow yelled.

Angel stopped pacing and turned to look at her. "Willow, do you have any protection around the house? I felt something when I first got here, and Spike was waiting for me like he knew I was coming."

Willow nodded. "There's a barrier around the house. It won't stop Glory, but it will let us know if she is nearby."

"Oh, great! We get to know in advance that we're about to die. So not helpful, Will."

"Well, you're not being very helpful either," she told him with a scowl.

She heard Spike whimper and she put her arms protectively around him. The vampire seemed to have regressed to an earlier stage of his recovery, cowering close to her and refusing to look anyone in the face. She did her best to console him, whispering false reassurances in his ear. The truth was, she had no idea how they were going to stop Glory.

"Xander, you and Willow have faced this demon before. What do you know about it?"

"First, Glory is not a demon but a god, two, we can't defeat her, and three, we're fucked! Did I miss anything, Will?"

Willow glowered at her friend, his pessimism and sarcasm grating on her taut nerves. What he was saying could not be true, at least not the last two parts, not when she had found Spike and things were looking up for once in a very long time. There had to be a way to defeat Glory, they just had to find it and fast. She replayed in her mind every encounter they'd had with the hell goddess. They had to have missed something. She refused to think that anything was indestructible.

"Did anyone notice something about the cloud at the club? I mean, if she is so powerful, why didn't she just sweep through the place and chew us all up in one fell swoop?" She asked.

Xander shrugged. "Because it's more fun to taunt and terrorize us before the actual killing?"

"Uh, could be. But I don't think that's all of it. She seemed to be moving, I don't know, slow. Kinda like a giant slug."

"Giant slug with sharp teeth, you mean. Don't forget the teeth, or whatever the hell it uses to chew people up."

"What do you think that means?" Angel asked Willow, ignoring Xander's comment.

Willow pried herself from Spike and stood up, biting nervously on her lip as she tried to make sense of all the information she had collected about Glory over the previous two years.

"I don't know, but when she was here before, in human form, she had to keep sucking people's minds to stay sane. I think this dimension affects her in an adverse way. Maybe even in her true form, being here may slow her down, weaken her somehow."

Angel looked skeptical. "She didn't seem very weak. And no matter how slow she moves, we still can't get close to her without being chewed up and spit out."

Xander ran a hand through his hair and flopped down on a chair. "You know what I don't get? If she doesn't like it here, why the fuck does she keep coming back?!"

"To kill us all one by one, obviously," Angel answered.

"That's it," Spike mumbled.

Three heads turned to look at him. Willow had not been aware that the vampire was even listening.

"Oh, that's a great idea, Captain Peroxide. Let her kill us all and then she'll leave. Thank you so much for your useless contribution!"

Willow's eyes widened in understanding. She ran over to Spike, holding his face in her hands and giving him a quick peck on the lips.

"That's not what he meant. He means what you said before, Xander. She doesn't like it here."

Both Angel and Xander looked at her as if she had lost her mind. She sighed in exasperation.

"Xander, when Glory was here before, what was she trying to do?"

"Open the portal so that she could get back to her dimension. So?"

"So she keeps coming back because the portal is open and she can travel back and forth. But, if we were to close the portal ..."

"Then she would be stuck here and she would be a sad little goddess and we would all be dead! Am I the only one noticing how all these plans keep leading to the same 'we are going to die' conclusion?"

Willow shook her head. "Not if we give her enough time to jump through the portal before it's closed all the way! I don't think she would risk being stuck here again."

Angel looked at her grimly. "Except that we don't have a way to close the portal."

"Yes, we do," Willow insisted. "I have the spell, the materials are here, I'm almost sure I'm strong enough. It has to work!"

"See, it's that 'almost' part I don't like," Xander grumbled.

Angel set his face into a stern expression. "Willow, you know that you can't do that. Even the spell you did at the club was too dangerous. There's no way I'm going to let you ..."

Willow felt anger born out of fear and frustration well up in her. She was well aware of the risks to herself, but if there was another way, she wasn't seeing it, and she didn't think they had enough time to look for it. As it was, Angel was wasting precious minutes arguing with her.

"So, you're going to let us all die out of sheer nobility, is that it?"

"No! But I'm not going to risk you to save myself and the others!" He growled back at her.

Willow's tone softened. "But you would sacrifice yourself to save us."

"That doesn't matter, I can't close the portal."

"Then let me do it and you just be here for me afterward, to bring me back."

Silence ensued, each person in the room mentally weighing the risks and options.

"Wills, how dangerous is this spell?"

Willow felt she had to be honest with her friend. "Very. I've never done a spell this strong. Actually, is not even one spell, but a combination. I will need to load up with as much magick as I can gather, from every source. Then I have to channel that magick into the spell that will release the energy of the crystal, and then I need to sustain and direct the energy of the crystal until the portal is closed; that will be the hardest part, I will have a lot of magick running through me and I have to stay in complete control."

"And if you lose control?" Xander's voice was hesitant, as if he didn't really want to know the answer.

"Then it won't matter, because everything and everyone within a one-hundred mile ratio will probably be dead," she proclaimed somberly.

"I'm so not liking this plan!"

"It's the only one we have. Please trust me."

She studied the faces around her, hoping that they trusted her enough to let her do the spell, knowing that she would do it even if they didn't want her to.

"I trust you, luv."

Willow smiled warmly at Spike, who seemed calmer and was looking up at her.

"I know you do, Spike." She turned toward the others. "Well?"

Xander nodded reluctantly, but Angel didn't look convinced. "Spike, you are not thinking clearly. This is just too dangerous, and not only for her."

Spike stood up and walked to stand next to Willow. "I might not be thinking clearly, but she has faced Glory before and lived, she brought me back, I know she can do this. Do you think I like shaking and crying like a babe every time I come near that bleeding bitch? I'm a bloody demon, for Christ's sake! You go spend a few decades with her and then tell me how you feel about her, you bloody poof!"

"Spike, this isn't about you..."

"Bloody right it isn't! As much as Glory hates me, I'm willing to wager that right now she is hating Will a lot more. Maybe the reason she didn't kill us at the club is because she doesn't want us dead, did any of you bloody idiots think about that? I know what she is capable of and I will kill Red myself before I let Glory take her!"

"It will not come to that!" Willow assured them. "This can work, but I will need your help, all of you."

Angels sighed. "What do you need us to do?"

Willow had the ridiculous urge to jump up and down and clap her hands. While she knew the risks involved and part of her was reluctant to take the chance, the witch in her was excited about performing the complex and powerful spell. She could already feel the magic swirling and crackling inside her, building the momentum in anticipation of the big event. She was all business at that moment, directing each person in the room to their task.

"I need the boxes that were here yesterday, the ones with the magick supplies and the crystal."

Spike jumped into action. "They are in the basement, I'll get them."

"Good. Xander, I'm going to need you to drive the car. I'll teleport to the summit of the hill that sits just outside of town, the one with the large trees, where we used to play. Do you remember where it is?"

Xander nodded.

"Ok. I'll start the spell and I need you, Spike and Angel to find Glory and lure her there. Don't let her catch up with you, but don't go too fast either. Remember, she moves slowly."

"Oh, goody! I get to be the bait-boy, again!"

"Angel," she frowned at the somber vampire, "you work on keeping the brooding to a minimum, it's distracting." She ignored Angel's scowl.

Spike returned with the boxes and handed them to Willow. "Thanks, Spike. Angel, explain the plan to Spike. I'm going upstairs to prepare. If Glory is coming, you will know. It will feel like a high frequency hum and a tremor that will increase in intensity as she gets closer to the house. If you feel that, don't wait for me. Jump in the car and take off. I will teleport out. Everyone clear?"

She waited for everyone in the room to nod before she took off up the stairs at a run. After gathering everything she would need, she sat in the middle of the room and began to chant, letting the magick build inside her and blocking out everything else. Her plan had to work.

~Part: 17~

Time seemed to slow down and minutes stretched into hours as Spike waited for Willow to join them. He was not happy about the idea of taking off and leaving her behind, no matter how much trust he had in her abilities. He had meant what he had said earlier; there was no way he was going to let Glory take Willow alive.

He leaned against the wall, closely watching the other two males in the room. None of them spoke. Angel was nervous. Spike could almost taste the other vampire's trepidation and knew that it went beyond mere anxiety over the prospect of facing Glory. Xander was just as anxious. The boy paced the room for a few minutes before returning to his chair, only to jump up and repeat the process. Spike could not help but feel a sliver of respect for the boy. Without vampiric strength or Willow's magic, he was the one least likely to be able to defend himself against Glory. His resolve wavered, but it never failed, and Spike respected that, not that he would ever tell him as much.

However, both Angel's and Xander's emotions combined still didn't add up to what Spike was feeling. He had nearly lost it when he saw Glory at the club. He wasn't certain what had clued him in on the identity of the gaseous creature. It wasn't her appearance, since he had never seen anything inside the dark room with him, the dark mass probably blending in seamlessly with the darkness in the room. In one instant, he had just known, and the realization had torn through his mind more viciously than Glory had ripped at his flesh. Even away from her presence, the thought of being captured by Glory again was enough to slightly unhinge him. The thought fleetingly crossed his mind that what they were attempting to do was madness, that they should all flee and take their chance that the Hell Goddess would not follow them. Spike knew that it was only his fear that made him think that way, that the only way any of them would ever be safe was closing the portal. Still, it was a tempting idea,
 one that he knew was possible and that the others were considering as well.

Spike glanced toward the stairs when he heard Willow descending. She was carrying a box in her arms but his eyes were focused on her face. Her eyes were dark, almost black, and her face was set into a grimace, as if she was struggling or in pain.

"It's show time," she announced when she reached the bottom of the stairs. Her voice was strained, and the half smile she gave him didn't quite reach her eyes.

He pushed away from the wall but did not remove his eyes from the woman in front of him. If that was the last time that he would get the opportunity to take a good look at her, he wanted to make it last for as long as he could. She walked up him as the others got ready to leave.

"Are you ok with this, Spike?" She asked him softly.

He tilted his head, studying the strange, dark eyes that seem so out of place in the woman's otherwise delicate, sweet face. He wanted to scream out that nothing was ok with him, that something inside him had changed, perhaps irreparably, and that he might never be ok with anything ever again.

"Yeah, I'm fine. How about you? You don't look, right."

Willow nodded. "I'm fine. There's just a lot of power inside me right now, it feels kind of, I don't know, icky I guess. I'm not used to it, that's all."

She paused for a moment, looking at him strangely. He knew that they were both lying, that she was as scared as he was, as they all were, and he wanted her to know that she wasn't alone in her doubts. "Red, I ..."

His words were interrupted by a strange humming noise coming from the walls, similar to what he had heard minutes before Angel had shown up. The house continued to hum and shake slightly at a slowly increasing tempo. Willow had been right, Glory wasn't moving very fast, but she was near.

Xander grabbed the car keys from the table. "If I'm not mistaken, that's our cue to get the fuck out of here."

Willow whirled around and Spike fought his urge to gather her in his arms and tell her to forget it, to jump in the car with him and just take off as fast as they could.

"She is very close by, you better hurry. Xander, you remember where I told you to go, right?" Willow asked.

Xander nodded, already halfway to the door, with Angel following close behind. Spike had turned to join them when he felt Willow's hand on his arm. "Spike, it's going to be alright, really. This is going to work."

Not able to resist the urge, he leaned down and kissed her cheek. "For good luck," he whispered. "Now go, I'm not walking out that door until I know you're safely out of the house."

Willow smiled at him before she whispered a few words and disappeared in a quickly dissipating puff of smoke. Spike ran to join the others who were already in the car. Only a block away, the barely visible cloud was moving slowly up the street. He stared at it, unable to move or react until he heard Angel's urgent voice.

"Spike, get in the car."

He finally jumped into the car and they took off, with Xander at the wheel. The ride to the hill was a slow, nerve wrecking game of hurry up and wait. Several times, Xander sped up to put distance between themselves and Glory, only to have to stop to make sure that she was still following them. He finally stopped just outside of town. All three looked nervously out of the rear view window at the deserted road behind them. A minute passed, then two.

"Where the fuck did she go?"

Spike wasn't certain if it was Angel or Xander who had mumbled the question, but something was certainly not right. Glory could not have fallen that far behind them.

"How much further to the hill?" He asked.

"Just at the end of this road. We are almost there."

"Keep going, let's just get there."

Xander looked nervously at Spike. "Spike, Willow was very specific about making sure that Glory follows us."

Spike clenched his jaw, torn between jumping out of the car and running the remaining distance, and tearing Xander apart for questioning him. "Something is not right, she should be right behind us."

"Don't you think I fucking know that?! But she is not there and I just don't know what we are supposed to do now!"

Both men looked to the back seat when Angel started to get out of the car. "Oh, good plan, Dead Boy, let's all go roaming through the dark woods to see if we run into the Hell Goddess. You haven't watched many horror movies, have you?"

"You two go on and get to Willow. Glory isn't fast enough to catch me. If I find her, I'll lead her to the hill." Not waiting for an answer, Angel jumped out of the car and disappeared into the darkness.

A sudden bright flash illuminated the road. High in the sky, red bolts crackled around a narrow strip of light.

"That's the rift. Red must have started the spell. Step on it, Xander."

The boy seemed startled by Spike's use of his given name, but he did as instructed and in a couple of minutes they reached the summit of the hill. The entire hill was illuminated by an incandescent light and what had looked like a small line from a distance, now looked like a giant tear in the sky that started right above their heads and traveled in a jagged line to the ground. Willow was standing straight in front of it, the crystal held firmly in her hands. Her head was thrown back, her eyes fixed on the sky above her as she chanted. Spike took a step toward her. "Red, we have a problem, we lost Glory back there ..."

A rustle behind him caught his attention, followed by the sound of a terrifyingly familiar voice.

"Aww, were you looking for me, Precious?"

Spike whirled around at the sound of the voice, feeling as if all the borrowed blood had been drained out of his body when he saw Glory in human form step out from behind a large tree, brushing leaves from her elegant dress.

"Had to take a short cut. I should have known the little witch would be up to something." She turned her head to look in Willow's direction. "And will you stop that mumbling, it's giving me a headache!" Glory placed one manicured hand to the side of her head, rolling her eyes in exaggerated annoyance.

Spike knew he had to do something to get the Goddess' attention away from Willow. "What's the matter, Glory, you don't look so well," he asked, placing himself between her and the witch.

"I had forgotten how awful this place is! I think I need a quick pick me up," she pouted. "You, come here!" She commanded, pointing at Xander who had been standing on the other side of the clearing, staring agape.

"I don't think so, your Holy Bitchiness. I don't know how it is where you come from, but down here, you don't call the shots. You don't like it, you can scurry your ass back to where you came from."

Good, mate, Spike thought. Xander had caught on to his plan to keep the confused goddess busy until Willow was ready to send her through the rift.

Too late, Spike spotted four of Glory's minions stepping out from behind the trees.

"Grab him!" Glory ordered her minions, who immediately descended on Xander.

Spike rushed forward, but found his legs immobilized by two other minions who were clinging to him. Frantically, he kicked at them. Glory moved toward Xander, her steps unsteady. The minions began to drag Xander toward her. Spike saw him struggled to loosened their grip on him, but there were too many of them.

Spike swung his arm down, knocking one of the minions off his leg. He grabbed the other by the neck, punching viciously against its face until its round skull was pulverized. Glory was standing next to Xander, her hand outstretched. With a roar, Spike launched at her. At that moment, he felt a rush of air and his body made contact not only with Glory but with someone else. The momentum carried them through the air and Spike found himself on top of Glory. Angel was on the ground next to them.

"Get off me, you piece of shit!" With one hard shove, Spike was propelled off Glory, landing hard on his side. The goddess was on her feet in an instant, looming over Angel. From the ground, Spike glanced at Willow who continued to chant, apparently oblivious to the danger around her. Xander was still fighting off the minions. He had managed to knock two of them off himself. Spike jumped to his feet, running toward Xander and ripping one of the minions away from him, slamming the screaming creature against the trunk of a tree and watching it slump to the ground.

"Who are you?" Glory asked Angel, her voice angry. "Never mind," she added, lifting him off the ground by the front of his shirt with one hand. "Don't go too far, lover, I think I'm going to take you with me." She told a stunned Angel before slamming him against the ground. Angel groaned but jumped to his feet.

"Change of plans, babe," he announced before punching Glory on the face. He continued to rain blows on her, while Xander and Spike fought off the minions that poured into the clearing seemingly out of nowhere. All three knew that it was a losing battle; their only hope was that they could distract Glory long enough for Willow to complete the spell.

As Spike viciously ripped the arm off of the nearest minion, he heard Willow's voice whispering urgently to him. "Spike, tell Xander to go."

He paused what he was doing and frowned in confusion. "What?"

The minion looked up at him, clutching the stump where his severed appendage used to be. "I didn't say anything," he stammered.

"I wasn't talking to you, you bloody lump."

Willow's voice continued to whisper in his head. She sounded tired and weak. "He is the only one that Glory can use to make herself stronger. Don't let her get him."

"Got ya'!" Spike ripped the minion's head off its shoulders and tossed it aside. He ran toward Xander. "Xander, go!"

The boy stared at him in confusion while Spike continued to fight off the minions. Spike was sore, bloodied and tired, and in no mood to argue with the human. The thought occurred to him that it would be easier to just kill him. He didn't think that Glory could suck the brain of someone who was already dead.

He heard Willow's anguished voice. "Spike, don't, please! Just tell him to go."

"Bloody hell, Red. You can hear me think?"

"I can hear everything, everyone, at once in my head. Please, Spike, help me."

"Get in the bloody car and go!" Spike spat at Xander. When Xander made no move to leave, Spike added. "Willow said for you to go. Now!"

Reluctantly, the boy turned around and ran into the woods in the direction of the car. Spike heard Glory's shrill voice behind him.

"Forget the vampire, get the human back, you useless bags of dirt!"

The minions ran to obey their Mistress and Spike found himself standing alone in the clearing, facing Glory. In the distance, he heard the motor of Xander's car and he knew that the boy had gotten away safely. A few feet away, Angel laid on the ground, bloodied and nearly unconscious. Spike trembled involuntarily as he saw the goddess move toward him, a deceivingly sweet smile on her face.

"Now, precious, while we wait, what do you think I should do with the little witch?"

"Stay away from her, you fucking cunt," he growled between clenched teeth, knowing that his words lacked conviction. Fear was threatening to overwhelm him, paralyzing him. As if in a dream, he saw Glory's hand move toward him, an instant before she slapped him across the face, knocking him down to the ground.

"I think you've forgotten everything I taught you, you worthless piece of cold meat!" She yelled in his face as he tried to rise to his feet. She kicked his legs from under him, sending him back to the ground on his knees. She nudged his limp cock with the tip of her high heeled shoe. "We're just going to have to start your lessons all over again," she concluded with an exasperated sigh, before kicking him on the groin.

Spike rolled onto his side, clutching himself in pain. Through his tears, he saw Glory move toward Willow. "I'm sorry, Red, I tried," he whispered.

"Almost there, Spike, I just need another minute, can you give me that?"

Willow's voice inside his head was both soothing and urgent. Spike clung desperately to her words, swallowing his fear. "I'm sorry, Mistress. Please forgive me, I'm sorry," he blurted out.

Glory stopped, turning to look at him. "Oh, you're not sorry yet, Precious. Before I get through with you, you'll be begging me to kill you!" Glory threatened.

Spike crawled across the ground until he was bowed in front of Glory, his lips pressed against the top of her foot. "Yes, punished. To stupid to learn, I shouldn't have attacked you, Mistress. I need to learn. Please, Mistress..." Spike continued to grovel at Glory's feet, whispering whatever came into his mind that he thought would please her to hear. He kept his eyes closed, picturing not Glory but Willow before him - Willow smiling kindly at him, touching him softly and whispering soothingly. He tried not to think about what he was doing, what he was saying, or about the fact that after all he had been through he was back where he had started, at Glory's feet and her non-existent mercy.

The ground began to shake under him with a low grumble that grew in intensity until it felt as if the earth was crumbling beneath him. The light began to dim and shadows rolled in from the edges of the clearing. Willow had done it, the rift between dimensions was closing. He felt Glory's hand in his hair, jerking him roughly to his feet, bringing his face flush with hers.

"You knew what she was doing and you didn't warn me! I hope you think it was worth it, because you're coming with me!"

Spike slumped in her grip, resigned to his fate, as Glory dragged him closer to the narrowing fissure. He wasn't sure if it had been worth it, more like an even draw. Nothing gained and nothing lost, but at least they had tried.

Suddenly Willow was standing beside them, teeth bared, eyes blazing. "Not so fast bitch, he's mine!"

There was a final, bright burst of energy and all three flew through the air before the clearing was swallowed by the darkness. Spike had hit his head when he landed, he could feel the sticky trickle of blood travel down the back of his neck. Only the moonlight illuminated the clearing and his eyes searched the penumbra for Willow. He saw her laying on the ground a few feet away from him, not moving. With some effort, he made his way toward her. He was aware of Angel nearby, groaning and rising to his feet. He thought that he heard Xander running toward him, asking what had happened, but Spike's attention was solely focused on the unconscious woman. Her breathing was shallow, her heartbeat barely discernable even to his sensitive hearing. Gathering her in his arms, he pressed his face against her chest.

"Red. Red, wake up." When she didn't answer him, he grew frantic. "Damn it, Willow, wake the fuck up!" He roared, as he lifted her body and began to shake her. He heard Xander screaming at him to let her go, felt Angel's hands on his shoulders, trying to pry him away from Willow, but all he could think was that she was dying and that he would be left all alone.

Finally, Angel forcibly picked him up, whirling Spike around to face him. "You're probably not going to believe this, but I'm sorry," Angel said before hitting Spike square in the jaw, knocking him unconscious.

~Part: 18~

Willow heard a low growl next to her ear. It sounded like Spike, but it didn't make sense that he was growling at her. Spike only growled when he was angry, and the sound usually preceded someone's gruesome and painful death. The woman realized that it was dark and she had no idea where she was. She moaned and tried to move, but her limbs were heavy, her mouth dry.

"Spike?" She whimpered.

"I'm right here, Pet. Open your eyes."

She heard his voice. He was nearby; if only she could see him maybe she could figure out what was happening. Did he just tell me to open my eyes? It made sense; it was dark because her eyes were closed. She tried to force her lids up, groaning with the effort. Her thoughts were muddled, her body limp. Other voices joined Spike's, telling her to wake up. All she could think was that she wanted them to go away and let her sleep, but the urgency of their tone told her it was important that she woke up.

The last thing she remembered was being on the hill, casting the spell to close the fissure in the portal. It had felt amazing, all the power coursing through her body, the feeling of being outside of herself and everywhere at once, as if each molecule of her body had been stretched to encompass everything for miles. She remembered talking to Spike. No, not talking to him, but actually being him, inside of him, his thoughts and emotions had been one with hers, and yet distinct from her own, just like everything and everyone around her.

The memory of Glory came back to her and Willow frowned. For one instant, it was as if their minds had touched, just before Willow had spent the last modicum of energy on freeing Spike from Glory's grip. The goddess had said something to her before releasing Spike.

"You don't know what you're in for, little girl," that's what Glory had said. If it had not taken so much effort on her part, Willow would have smiled. Bitter much, Glory? The threat was moot; Willow had felt their connection break as the goddess had jumped through the portal just before it closed permanently. Glory would have to lick her wounds in her own dimension. Willow was certain that they had seen the last of her, which didn't explain why Spike was still growling.

Willow opened her eyes slowly and saw Spike's face only a couple of inches away from hers. She followed his gaze and saw Angel and Xander standing across the room - her bedroom - with worried expressions on their faces.

"What's going on, is everyone ok?" She asked weakly.

She felt Spike pull her to him, wrapping her in a bone crushing embrace. "We are fine, how are you, luv?"

Willow tried to push him away. "Ow. Having trouble breathing now!"

She heard Xander chuckle and Spike's grip on her loosened.

"Uh, Will, we would love to come over and hug you too, if you can get Fang Boy to stop growling at us every time we try to come near you."

Willow scowled at Spike, but had to smile at him reassuringly when she saw the guilty flush on his face. "Sorry," he mumbled under his breath, loud enough for only Willow and maybe Angel to hear.

Xander rushed to the bed, wedging himself onto the narrow edge and throwing an arm around Willow. Angel walked to stand next to her, and uncharacteristically wide smile on his lips.

"I take it this means everything is ok now?" Willow asked.

"We kicked godly ass, Will," Xander informed her.

"What do you mean we? All you did was run like a sodding bint!"

"Hey, my running saved your ass, I'll have you know, and my brain, but your ass, too!"

"Funny, 'cause I don't think Glory would have gotten much out of sucking your tiny brain, you bloody moron!"

Willow sent Angel an imploring glance. Fighting a Hell Goddess was one thing, but being trapped between two cantankerous, bickering friends was another.

"Uh, I think maybe we should go, let Willow rest a little longer," Angel suggested.

Xander kissed the top of her head and stood up. "You hungry, Will? I can order us some pizza."

Willow nodded. Pizza sounded wonderful, much better than the gallons of soup she'd had to endure the last time she had been confined to her bed. Vampires might be good allies in a fight, but when it came to choosing dinner, nothing beat a fellow human being.

Willow looked over at Spike and could tell by the stubborn set of his jaw that he had no intention of moving from the bed. He sank further into the mattress when the other two left.

"About time, I thought they would never leave," he grumbled. He ran his hand over Willow's side. "Are you sure you're ok, Pet?"

Willow frowned at his battered face. "I'm more worried about you right now."

"Nah, it's nothing, luv. Just a few scratches, almost healed they are."

She smiled, inching closer to him. "Sure you don't want me to kiss them and make them better?" She asked.

Spike bent his head down, his lips brushing gingerly against hers. "You can kiss all you want," he whispered, before taking her mouth in a soft kiss.

~*~

Several hours later, Willow stood on her front porch watching Xander drive away. They had eaten dinner together and Xander had filled her in on what had happened at the hill after she had collapsed. After leaving the clearing, Xander had circled around to find the hill completely dark and no sign of Glory or her minions. Spike had been out of control and Angel had to knock him out to keep him form injuring her or himself. After they had reached the house, Spike had refused to leave her side, growling at Angel whenever the other vampire tried to convince him to go downstairs and drink some blood. Angel and Xander had hunted down the few remaining minions. It appeared that most of them had killed themselves when they realized that their mistress had left and there was no way for them to join her.

Willow had been unconscious for an entire day and it was already Sunday. Xander needed to be back at work the following morning and Willow had assured him that it was alright for him to leave.

The front door opened and Angel joined her. Willow smiled up at him. "Let me guess, you have demons to slay, helpless to help, evil plots to thwart, and you have to leave."

Angel smiled ruefully. "Something like that, but yes, I'm needed back in L.A."

"Oh, it's ok for you to go, Spike and I will be fine, really."

Angel set his jaw and looked intently at the rustling leaves of the tree in front of the house, obviously avoiding her eyes. "Actually, I was thinking that I should take Spike with me."

Willow grew serious. "That's not up to me, Angel. You need to talk to Spike." Saying the words hurt, because she knew they were true. Whatever Spike decided, she would have no choice but to abide by it. Angel's next words filled her with relief.

"I already tried talking to him; he will not go unless you tell him to."

"Then it's settled, because I'm not sending him away, not after everything I went through to get him here."

Angel frowned down at her, an expression that made her fidget uncomfortably. It was obvious that Angel didn't approve of her and Spike living together, and it hurt her that he of all people didn't understand.

"Willow, you have to realize that this is not the same Spike you knew. The chip is gone and there's nothing holding him back. Spike is unpredictable, and that's on a good day. Has it occurred to you that you might not know what you're getting into?"

Willow scowled, there had to be something not right when one's friends started sounding like scorned hell goddesses. "Angel, I know what I know. I need Spike and he needs me, we are the only thing the other has left. As far as what's holding him back, affection and loyalty hold him to me, and trust, something that you probably know nothing about."

Her words sounded harsher than she had intended, but she meant every word. She heard Angel sigh and saw a resigned expression on his face. "Fine, but please, watch him closely. If you see anything, anything at all that makes you suspicious, please don't ignore it ..."

Willow nodded. "I won't and I will call you, right away, I promise," she said, raising her right hand in a solemn oath.

Angel nodded his approval. "Then just let me talk to him before I leave."

Willow nodded and sat on the steps, listening to Angel walk into the house and close the door behind him. Few things were certain on the Hell Mouth, but Willow had never been more sure that she had made the right choice as when she had decided to let Spike live with her. Her feelings for him were different than the tender love she had felt for Tara, and Willow didn't expect Spike to share the grand passion he had felt for Drusilla with her, but what they had was enough.

She waited a few minutes and then walked into the house, no longer able to contain her curiosity about Angel and Spike's conversation. The two vampires were sitting on the couch and Angel's back was turned to her. Her jaw dropped when she realized that Angel was giving Spike pretty much the same lecture he had given her earlier about Spike, except that he was warning Spike about her!

Spike nodded his head. "I got it, no mojo of any kind unless it's a matter of life or death, and call you if I she starts to act strangely, or if I suspect she is using the dark mojo again."

Spike winked at Willow over Angel's head and the older vampire jumped to his feet. He glanced uncomfortably at her, like a kid who had just being caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Willow could not repress a giggle.

"Hum, I better go. Just remember what I said, both of you."

"How can we forget when you'll probably call every bleeding day to remind us," Spike mumbled..

Willow smiled as she walked Angel to the door, repeating the same words she had said to Xander earlier. "We'll keep in touch and call often. Maybe come visit in a few weeks. Trust me, Angel, we'll be alright."

After Angel had left, Willow flopped down on the couch next to Spike and snuggled close to him.

"He is a bloody pain in the ass," Spike commented as he put his arm around her shoulders.

Willow sighed contentedly. "He means well, Spike."

"Ok, so he is a well meaning pain in the ass."

Willow was laughing at Spike's strange compromise when her gaze settled on the coffee-table in front of them. She was surprised to see that Spike had added two new pictures to their collection, the photograph of Tara and a framed sketch of Angel. Tears filled her eyes as she studied each of the faces of her friends, both near and gone, on the photos. She felt Spike shrug. "It just seemed right."

Willow nodded, smiling through her tears. At that moment she realized that even though Spike would never say it in so many words, openly displaying the pictures was his way of letting her know that he understood the concept of loyalty and family, and what it meant to truly belong.

~ El Fin ~

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