***
Willow flicked through the Latin dictionary; she was beginning to hate Latin. She had various phrases that needed to be translated by Monday for her tutorial, which would have been finished last night if it wasn't for Spike and his stupid cookies. Willow blushed, she vaguely remembered Spike singing and a piggyback ride, the next clear memory she had was of Spike waking her up with an orgasm. His tongue was just too talented. Willow sighed and wiggled slightly in her chair. After that blissful wake up call they had proceeded to have sex. Great sex. Great sex that had made her scream and grab the bed sheets. That's when it hit her that they were copulating in Giles bed, she had panicked - her screams were totally different to those of a few moments back. Spike had calmed her fears, assuring her that Giles was asleep and that no one would know, their secret was safe. Fears subdued they had made good use of being in a bed together. Willow crossed her legs and squirmed on her chair again, wincing at the slight pain that the movement generated. Damn good use of the bed.

But of course it ended with Giles slamming the front door on his way out. Willow had woken up and been horrified - Giles would have to have known.

"Yep, let's see...two naked people, one a girl, one a guy, in a bed and screams, moans and groans coming from the room. No of course they wouldn't be doing anything that they shouldn't!" Willow muttered to herself as she rubbed her temples trying to will the Latin phrases to translate. Spike had laughed at her, shrugging off her concerns. It wasn't just the fact that Giles would know about them - it was inevitable that people would find out, at the moment the less people the better - but it was the disrespect of the actual act, she would hate it if someone had sex in her bed. It was that concern that Spike couldn't comprehend, that he had laughed at.

"Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!" she screamed at her Latin textbook and threw down her pen. "God, I wish I could talk in tongues!"

She leant back in her chair, crossed her arms and grinned wickedly. It had been incredible to be with Spike in a bed, no matter how bad she felt afterwards. Closing her eyes she thought about him, she loved his body, lean and muscular, strong and graceful, a wicked mind combined with an insatiable appetite for carnal fun. So wrapped up in her thoughts she was shocked when she heard a soft moan and blushed as she realised it was her own. Sitting back up in the chair she shook her head and turned her attention back to the despised Latin text.

"Why can't I be fluent in Latin?" she griped to the empty room. The sun was setting and the quicker she got the Latin out of the way the sooner she could go and see Spike. "It shouldn't be that hard, most of my spells are in Latin so..."

Bringing her hand up she chewed on her thumb, her eyes falling on one of her spell books. After the chaos of her last spell she hadn't really been doing much casting. Reaching out she picked it up and started to flick through the pages until she came across a spell of tongues. Glancing about the empty room she considered it for a moment. She was sober, it wasn't a hard spell, what could possibly go wrong? Smiling she set about to do the casting. Some twenty minutes later she was finishing up the Latin phrases just as Spike walked through the door, usual wicked smirk donning his lips.

"Hello love," he bent over and placed a soft kiss on her temple, glancing at the book in front of her. "What are you doing? Reading up on something we haven't done yet?"

"Lasciva est nobis paginas vita proba," said Willow smiling up at him. Spike laughed out loud and grabbed the back of her chair.

"What?" he asked through his mirth.

"Lasciva est nobis paginas vita proba," Willow repeated her smile wanning and her eyes narrowing.

"Okay pet, so 'my book is filthy but my life is pure' - what the hell is that all about?" Spike asked, trying to stifle his laughter.

Willow's mouth dropped open and she bought her hands up to cover her face, the sound of utter horror leaving her. Spike lost the need to laugh at her and gently pried her fingers away from her face.

"Willow? What is it?"

She gave him a tiny half smile accompanied by a soft whimper before explaining, in perfect Latin, that she had cast a spell of tongues. Spike lost it, he collapsed onto the floor next to her chair in laughter. Tears rolled from his eyes, one hand clutched at his stomach while the other poked at the air in her general direction. After a good half hour of gut wrenching laughter he calmed down enough to speak to an extremely peeved Willow.

"Oh, love, that's just too precious," he laughed again, wiping away the few tears that escaped from his eyes. "That's what you get for cheating."

Finally struggling to his feet he picked up her spell book and, through a fit of giggles, cast a reversal spell. Putting the book back down he looked at her expectantly, flicking his fingers at her indicating for her to speak.

"Well I'm glad to see you enjoyed yourself at my expense!" she said, trying to desperately fight back the smile that threatened to betray her own feelings of mirth at her mistake. She couldn't help it, she had to laugh at herself. Spike shook his head and held out his hand.

"Quales illic homunculi!"

Willow's eyes narrowed in mock anger and she slapped his hand away playfully. "I am not a 'weird little munchkin' thank you very much...oh, Spike please tell me you're just joking? Say something else."

"Puella defututa," he grinned at her. Willow rolled her eyes in exasperation and sighed.

"Yes you are 'a thoroughly tried and tested nymphomaniac', but why are you speaking in Latin?" she frowned for a moment. "And why am I understanding every word of it? Hey this is great - I can understand you. Oh, yes! No more struggling with stupid Latin phrases, no more spending hours desperately searching for the meanings of words. I love this. I wonder if I could major in Latin? Maybe I could become a translator. Wow..."

Spike cleared his throat to gain her attention.

"What? Oh, sorry. Okay this isn't a problem," she picked up the spell book and looked at the page. "I'll just cast the spell and hey presto you'll be back to your normal self."

Spike grabbed the book from her and held it up above his head, so she couldn't reach it.

"Spike! What are you doing? Don't you want the spell reversed?"

Spike shook his head and began to explain, in Latin, that they should go to Giles as he had better plans for the evening rather than reversing spells all night long. Willow pouted for a moment, she was sure she could do the simple reversal spell, but then again if Spike had "plans" she didn't really want to spend time mucking around especially when they could be playing instead.

"Okay, fine...since you don't trust me," Willow grabbed her coat and headed toward the door. Spike grabbed her arm and spun her back into him, his hands reaching down to cup her ass. Willow smiled at him and rested her arms about his neck. "I know what you are thinking, Mister, and the answer is no - not while you are speaking Latin."

"Male me marem putatis?" he asked smirking at her.

"Well this," she said bringing one hand down to stroke his jean covered erection, causing him to moan and close his eyes briefly. "Would certainly disagree with the notion that I 'think this stud's been knackered'. But we should go and see Giles so he can help us."

Spike murmured something before crashing his lips down on hers, his tongue demanding entrance. Snaking one arm about her waist he grabbed one of her legs bringing it to his hip, she immediately wrapped it around him as his hand returned to her ass, picking her up and walking them to the bed. With a combined muffled grunt they fell back onto the bed. Pulling her mouth away from his Willow looked at him and shrugged.

"I think Giles can wait for a few hours," she offered.

***

"Willow...hello, I'm afraid Spike has gone out...or rather is right behind you..." Giles looked at the couple suspiciously. Willow was looking guilty and Spike was looking bemused.

"Giles, hi!" said Willow brightly, pushing past the Watcher into his lounge room. "You know how you kind of told me not to do anymore spells? Or rather that I should be more careful in my casting?"

Giles took off his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose. He suspected he wasn't going to like this. "Yes."

"Well, you know I'm just a college kid...we never really listen. Of course you wouldn't know that, you don't have kids. But hey you earnt the nickname "Ripper" during your day so you probably could understand that whole do the opposite to what you are told by your authority figures...and that's not really the point. Sorry," she shrugged and smiled broadly. "Well the thing is I cast a 'tongues' spell and it worked, really well, in fact I can understand Latin now - I think I might even be able to write in Latin!"

"You came to tell me that, Willow?" asked Giles putting his glasses back on and glancing at a suspiciously quiet Spike.

"Well, no, not really." Willow scrunched up her face, Giles wasn't going to be too happy about her latest spell bungle.

"What have you done Willow?" Giles sighed.

Spike all but growled at the annoyed attitude that came with Giles question.

"Ab hoc eiecto cadavere quicquam mihi aut opis aut ornamenti expetebam," spat Spike.

Willow groaned and rubbed at her temple. < 'I can't believe I was looking for anything useful or even ornamental in that lump of outcast offal', oh please don't let Giles understand! > thought Willow, her face crumpling into a frown.

"What in god's name did he just say?" asked Giles, astonished by the vampire's apparent fondness for using Latin.

"That's what happened. The spell backfired, I could only speak Latin and Spike did a reversal spell and now it's the only thing he can speak. Do you think you can help?" Willow blurted out, hoping beyond hope that Giles wasn't fluent in Latin and that Spike would keep his mouth shut.

"Really Willow, how many times must we have this conversation? You know how dangerous it can be messing about with magic. All spells hold a certain amount of risk. Certainly this time it may just be talking in tongues, but what next? You have to be more careful!"

Spike growled at the watcher, sick of his attitude, sick of his total lack of belief in Willow's skills, sick of his whole holier than thou attitude. He was going down...once the chip was gone Giles was right up there on the "must kill" list.

"Nil bene cum fagias, facias tamen omnia belde, vis digam quid sis? Magnus es ardalio." Spike growled at him. Giles turned his head and stared at the blond before laughing. "Quid rides vervex?"

< What did he just say? Think girl, think...um...um...'You do nothing well. But everything you do, you do in style. How should we describe you? You are just a great big piece of fluff.' That's not good. Oh god, 'what are you laughing at sheep's head?' Shut up Spike. > thought Willow, starting to panic.

"Okay, Spike, now would be a really good time to...to..." Willow desperately struggled with an idea that might shut him up before Giles actually worked out what he was saying. "Consider what you're future will be like in half an hour if you don't shut up!"

Spike looked at her. Was that a threat? What would happen in half an hour if he didn't shut up? What was she going to do to him? Crossing his arms he studied her, they were planning on going out for a drive in the Desoto after Giles fixed everything. Suddenly it dawned on him, if anything else came out of his mouth he would be locking himself in the bathroom and spend the night having a good wank. He shut up.

Willow sighed and turned back to Giles. "I know I should have been more careful but I was in a rush and now, well now everything is just...just..."

"Willow I am serious," stated Giles, taking off his glasses and glaring at her. "Magic isn't something you shouldn't mess about with - it has serious consequences. I know and you know that you have a wonderful aptitude for magic, you could be very powerful, but you have to be careful..."

Willow shifted uneasily on her feet, glancing at the ground. She knew Giles was right, she had allowed her desire for Spike to distract her, her casting was clumsy and rushed. Giles sighed and put his glasses back on.

"Which spells did you two use?" he asked. Busying themselves the three bent over Willow's spell book and set about gathering the various ingredients, the last of many of Giles supplies. As he laid out the various ingredients he watched Spike and Willow from the corner of his eye. Willow was oblivious to being observed, Spike not so but he continued to whisper things in her ear and brush against her. Giles watched quietly as Spike whispered something in her ear, making her giggle and blush. He couldn't help but smile, it was the happiest he had seen Willow in months. Giles shook his head, Spike was still a bloodthirsty demon and he wondered if the vampire knew what it meant to be involved with the redhead. Maybe it was time for another 'talk' with Spike. "Willow."

"Yes Giles?" she asked stepping away from Spike.

"Could you run down to the magic store and pick up those ingredients we have used while I cast the spell?" Giles asked, lighting a candle.

"Oh, well I thought that you'd need my help," Willow frowned.

"No, no it won't be necessary. You can put the things on my account," Giles stated straitening up and working the kinks out of his back. "By the time you get back everything will be fixed."

"Oh, okay then," Willow crossed her arms and headed out the door without a backward glance and the incredibly pissed off vampire and a rather bemused Watcher.

***

"Just send me away, like some little five year old. 'Oh, Willow go do this, go do that...no more casting for you'," Willow muttered as she walked toward the magic shop, her face twisting and grimacing. She was totally unaware that the spell had been cast and a small war of the words were currently being waged at Giles apartment. "Well at least I can understand Latin now."

"And that so important these days where long dead languages are constantly used."

"Buffy!" Willow had nearly jumped out of her skin when someone actually answered her ramblings. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh I was just heading on over to Giles. Thought I'd drop in and see how he's going. So are you feeling less inebriated than last night?" Buffy grinned at her friend, who immediately blushed.

"Oh Buffy I am so sorry about...what I said...last night and all," Willow frowned as her various 'speeches' drifted through her mind. Buffy just laughed.

"That's okay, you were pretty far gone. I trust that Giles kept you two apart?" Buffy smirked. Willow could feel her whole face flame bright red and immediately started stuttering, causing Buffy to laugh again. "Are you coming to visit Giles then?"

"What? Oh...um...well..." Willow stammered trying to think up a plausible reason why Buffy shouldn't go to Giles. "You know I think he is doing something with Spike. It might not be a good idea."

"What on earth could he possibly be doing with Spike that I shouldn't interrupt?" Buffy frowned, her face then paled. "Oh they aren't doing things that we, as heterosexual women, really don't want to even think about - are they? Because I know they're English and all but that's just...ick!"

"What?!" exclaimed Willow. Her mind suddenly flashed several unwanted images of Spike and Giles in a number of bizarre and twisted positions. "Ew, no, no definitely not."

"Well then Giles won't mind. Come on," Buffy tugged on her friends arm and led her back to the apartment she had left some ten minutes before. As they walked through the door they were greeted with the sight of the two men standing off and screaming at each other...in Latin.

"What is going on?" Buffy asked, her jaw nearly hitting the ground.

"Oh no," muttered Willow, she glanced at an enraged Spike before turning to Giles. "What happened?"

He explained in Latin, with Spike throwing in curses and Willow translating for Buffy, that he had stuffed up. Willow shook her head in disbelief, could this get anymore complicated? At least it was nice to see that Giles occasionally got things wrong as well.

"Why didn't you just recast the spell then?" Buffy asked. Giles threw his hands up in the air and muttered something that Willow decided didn't need translating.

"Because he doesn't have the ingredients," Willow stood up and headed for the door. "I'll go get them now. Will you stay with them Buffy? Make sure they don't tear each others throats out?"

It certainly looked as if that was what they were going to do. Each of them sitting on opposite sides of the room, casting death stares and the promise of exquisite torture at the other. Spike, for his part, was glowering, the demon just below the surface, his eyes flashing gold every time they fell on the Watcher.

"Sure, not a problem," Buffy sat down on the couch as Willow left the apartment and glanced at the two men. "So, I guess general conversation is out of the question. What about charades?"

***

Willow paused outside of the front door, her arms full of supplies from the magic shop, and listened to the soft tones of Spike's voice. Frowning she bit her bottom lip, that was the tone of voice he used with her generally in that blissful period after a good shag and just before they fell asleep. Suddenly she heard Buffy giggle and she had to swallow back a lump that was forming in her throat. Giles voice cut through Buffy's giggle and much to Willow's horror it had that same romantic ambience as Spike's had held a few moments before. Leaning forward she listened carefully to the Latin that he spoke.

"Psallere et saltare elegantius, quam negesse est probae," Giles all but breathed to Buffy.

< 'Plucking the lyre and gyrating her hips with a lot more dexterity than is needed by a decent woman.' What is he raving about? > Willow frowned, < Maybe I've lost my knack for translating? >

"Sed ei gariora semper omnia quam decus atque pudicitia fuit;" Spike's voice reached her ears, still soft and seductive. "Pecuniae an famae minus parcerect, haud facile discerners."

< 'Modesty and decency were the last things on her shopping list; and it would be difficult to work out whether she economised more stringently on her money or her reputation.' Okay this is just getting plain weird. What are those two playing at? > Willow thought as she continued to listen, enthralled by the soft voices of the two men.

"Mulier nigris dignissima barris," Giles spoke again.

< Oh my god, 'the kind of woman who could only be satisfied by a big black elephant', this is getting silly! > without further ado Willow pushed open the door. There, sitting happily on Giles couch were all three of them. Giles and Spike shared an evil smirk while Buffy sat between them her eyes glazed over and her breath coming rapidly. Spying Willow she jumped off the couch, blushing furiously.

"Willow, I...you...you weren't very long," she gulped, flustered. Walking over she grabbed Willow's arm. "I never knew that Latin could be so romantic!"

Willow looked at her friends flushed face, she didn't have the heart to tell her that both the guys had been insulting her.

"Yes, I guess it can be."

"Mmm, well, I think I'll be off now. I'll see you back at the dorm," Buffy said heading toward the door.

"Hey, weren't you here to see Giles?" Willow asked as Spike and Giles took the magic supplies from her.

"Oh, it doesn't matter. I'll see you later," and with that she was gone. Willow shook her head and turned back to the two men.

"Well that was just plain mean of you two!"

Spike grinned and turned to wave at the long gone Buffy. "Moecha putida."

"Buffy is not a 'dirty slut'," Willow hissed slapping Spike's arm. He merely shrugged. Giles shook his head at the two's behaviour.

"Omnis oratio moribus consonet." Giles shook his head at Spike as he went about setting up the ingredients once more.

< 'Your vocabulary is in perfect harmony with you horrid habits.' Well, Giles, I have to agree with you on that, but I think I'll keep my mouth shut. > Willow ducked her head down and looked at her hands.

"Garrula lingua!" Spike replied.

"Spike, Giles is not a 'motor mouth'," sighing she turned to the Watcher. "Can we PLEASE do this spell, I'm getting sick of translating everything."

Behind her Spike panicked, not liking the effect that a headache would have on their plans for the evening, and urged Giles to just "do the bloody spell".

Giles shook his head at the blond. "Corruptor iuventutis!"
 

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