Pairing: W/S (as always)
Summary: Love is a bitch-sometimes
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Later S7 after they've defeated the First. Spike now lives in the basement of Buffy's house.
Distribution: My site, Gunnin' Down Angel http://angel.wicked-raine.com , Red's Soul Mates, Willow's Lil Secret, Willow Spike Forever, Near Her Always, Cat's Hellmouth Cafe, Angelic Vamps, Cyberline, Rapture. And anyone else who has permission. If you do not, just ask and I'll say yes.
Feedback: Pretty Please!!!!! I crave it like I crave Spike and Lindsey McDonald.
Author's Note: ^^ = Willow's thoughts {} = Spike's thoughts ~~ = Buffy's thoughts.
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"You're in love. With me?" Willow asked skeptically.
"Well, yeah." Spike replied shyly.
"Yeah, I can tell by the way I'm just forgotten as soon as Buffy enters the room." She answered as she started pacing. "How could I have been so blind?" She asked sarcastically.
"Okay, I deserved that." He said as he walked over to her bed and sat on it. She stopped pacing and looked at him. He was sitting there, looking so vulnerable and so not 'Big Bad'. He was staring at his hands, which were in his lap. There was quiet for a few moments. "Things changed right before my eyes and I never even noticed." He mused.
"Tell me about it." She replied as she sat next to him. "I'm supposed to be gay, remember? I'm not supposed to be in love with you."
"You're in love with me?" Spike asked with evident surprise on his face.
"Well, duh!" She said as she stood. "Why do you think I'm in my room crying my eyes out?" He raised an eyebrow. "You asked if we could continue our conversation." She looked at him expectantly. He still had a confused look on his face. "I knew that the second Buffy asked if she could talk to you, you'd forget all about it." Her voice dropped to a whisper. "Just to be with her." She looked at the window. "And I knew that I'd come up here and cry my eyes out, feeling sorry for myself tonight, and be right back in the basement tomorrow. Just to be with you." She paused. "It hurts." Spike chuckled. Willow looked at him. "I'm glad to see my pain amuses you, Mr. I-Have-A-Soul-Now."
"You know what I was doing all during patrol?" He asked. She stared at him blankly, waiting for an answer. "I was asking the slayer if she could tell how you were really doing. I was asking all kinds of quirky questions about you. I was talking about you."
He stood and walked to the bedroom door as Willow looked at him in astonishment. "You know what else? For the few seconds after you left and came up here, I was asking what was wrong with you. Whatever person or demon did something to hurt my Red, was going to be ripped apart."
"God, I wish I could believe you." She sighed. "But I don't think I'm the one you want."
"Damn it, Willow!" He walked back over to the bed and kneeled before her. His eyes were a crystal clear blue. The sincerity in them was enough to bring tears to her eyes. "I am in love with you." He paused. "I don't know when I stopped loving Buffy-if I ever did. I just know that when you look at me, I feel like everything is going to be all right." She looked up at him as silent tears fell. "Like now." He cradled her face in his left hand and wiped a tear with his thumb. "I know that this is going to work. You are so much a part of me, that I don't know what would happen if I lost you."
The redhead didn't say anything for a few minutes. Her expression was blank as she looked at the wall behind the vampire. Spike was actually sweating; he was so scared she'd want to get away from him. After what seemed like an eternity, she sighed and shook her head. Spike's eyes became unfocused as he tried to hold back the tears that were sure to fall any second.
"It's definitely not going to be easy." She said as her eyes met his. He was actually immobile with this revelation. "I want to make sure that you really want this."
"I understand." He answered slowly. "Willow, baby, we can make it work. I don't mind the slow process. I want to show you how much I love you."
"So, I guess this is it." She said, expectantly.
"This is it." Spike replied.
"What were you like as a human?" She asked, knowing he would tell her the same thing he told her and everyone else: That he was just as evil and menacing as 'The Big Bad' vampire. Spike looked down at her hands and kissed the palms of each one.
"I really was called William the Bloody." He replied. She looked at him more closely. "The reason was because everyone considered me a 'bloody awful' poet."
"Wow." The witch said in awe. "That's a start."
"Don't tell anyone!" He begged in a hushed voice. "Only Angel and Dru know."
They talked until close to sunrise. Being the gentleman, he kissed her softly and promised to write her a 'bloody awful poem'.
End
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