********************
Willow angrily slammed the door and stormed into her house. She had
had a
long day and all she wanted was to relax in her bathtub. However, the
sight
she was greeted with was far from relaxing. Her kitchen, her lovely
kitchen,
was a disaster area. Sullied kitchenware filled the sink to overflowing.
The
door of the refrigerator hung open, leaving the contents to be exposed
to
the muggy California heat. The garbage, long past overflowing to the
beautiful white tile floor, blended in with the rest of the kitchen.
A stink
of rotted meat, old milk, and blood permeated the room. Willow pinched
her
nose in disgust. Burnt, crummy toast littered the counter. The door
of the
microwave hung open on its hinges, covered in a crusty, sticky substance.
Angrily Willow stomped to the cabinet to get a mug. A nice, warm glass
of
milk would calm her down. She ripped open the cabinet to discover nothing
save empty space. Then she glanced down at the sink, where a plethora
of
dirty mugs sat. She picked one up, then dropped it quickly. That one’s
contents had obviously been blood. She picked up another, glaring at
the
crusty mess that filled it. She washed it out and stomped over to the
fridge, where she pulled out the jug of milk only to discover that
it was
empty. Jaw clenched, Willow stalked over the garbage pan where she
took out
her frustrations by slamming the container into the wall.
Then, systematically, she grabbed a large garbage bag from a cabinet,
the
only cabinet that remained untouched in the fray. She walked around
the
kitchen, picking up the trash laying everywhere. When she had finished
that
task she took the trash to the can outside. She returned and used a
wet
washcloth to wipe the crumbs from the counter and the floor. Then,
she set
out to do the dishes. As she scrubbed furiously, she could hear the
TV
blaring away in the other room. With each passing dish her anger grew.
She
was sick and tired of coming home to a mess everyday. She was sick
and tired
of her ignorant, stupid, bleach blond roommate. Finally she finished
with
the dishes, only slightly satisfied that her kitchen was once again
clean.
She stomped out of the kitchen and into the living room, where Spike
was
watching a soap opera.
"I’m home," said Willow, her voice icy. Spike didn’t respond. "I’ve
been
home for over an hour now."
"That’s nice, pet," Spike murmured.
"Do you know what I’ve been doing? I’ve been cleaning the kitchen! Imagine
that!"
"Luv," Spike managed to pull his eyes from the telly, "Can’t you see
that
I’m busy here?"
Willow’s last nerve snapped. "MEN!" She screamed. "I HATE THEM!" She
stomped
to the television and flicked it off. She turned back to Spike. "You
listen,
and you listen good, mister. I’m sick and tired of coming home to a
dirty
house! I work hard, Spike, and I’m very busy. I leave the house in
pristine
condition, and when I come back it looks like a hellhole! I’m sick
of having
to come home and clean it up when there are so many things I need to
be
doing! You sit around on your lazy ass all day long and do nothing,
save for
making the mess you leave for me to clean up! WOULD IT KILL YOU TO
PICK UP
AFTER YOURSELF? IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR YOU TO THROW OUT OLD CONTAINERS
AND MAKE A FUCKING SHOPPING LIST?!"
"Pet," Spike said smoothly, "don’t you think that you’re over exaggerating
just a bit?"
Willow needed to get out of there before she personally staked the idiot.
"AURGH!" She screamed, then stomped off to the bathroom, where she
slammed
and locked the door. "MEN!"
Spike just shrugged and flicked the television back on. "She must be
PMSing."
********************
Willow sighed contentedly as the warm water washed over her tired, aching
body. She lifted vanilla flavor bubbles in her hand and blew lightly,
watching as they sailed around the room. She giggled in a childlike,
enraptured manner. She was just reaching for her shampoo when the door
of
the bathroom flew open. Willow shrieked and slid under the protective
layer
of bubbles. "Spike!" Willow sputtered.
Spike barely gave his naked redheaded roommate a second glance. "Yeah,"
He
muttered gruffly.
"I’m kind of taking a bath, here!"
"Yeah," he said, "so I noticed."
"GET OUT!" She shrieked.
"Why? He asked. "Doesn’t bother me much."
"IT BOTHERS ME!"
"Oh," Spike nodded knowingly. "You’re embarrassed. Don’t worry about
it.
I’ve seen plenty of naked women before."
Willow flushed dark red in a mixture of embarrassment and anger. She
counted
to ten slowly in her head. "Spike," she said, "you have ten seconds
to get
out of here or I swear to God you’ll be sorry."
He held up his hands. "Wait."
"1.."
"I just came in here to tell you something."
"2..3..4.."
"I’m going out."
"5..6.."
"To see Harmony"
"7..8.."
"I’ll be back in the morning."
"9.."
"Bye!"
"10"
He blew her a kiss and slammed the door shut just as Willow’s shampoo
went
flying through the air. It smashed into the now shut door and fell
to the
floor. Willow stood up angrily and stepped out of the tub. Thanks to
Spike,
her perfectly relaxing bath time was shot to hell. She grabbed her
terrycloth robe and wrapped it around her body, shivering slightly.
She
drained the tub and pulled a comb through her hair before stepping
out of
the bathroom. Her stomach growled in hunger, and she journeyed to the
kitchen. The sight was a catastrophe- garbage everywhere, dirty dishes
and
crumbs littering the counters and the floor. Willow opened her mouth
and let
out an ear piercing scream to the empty walls around her. "I’M GOING
TO KILL
HIM!"