Pairing: Willow/Spike
Rating: PG-13 (for a bit of language)
Summary: Spike's thoughts on why Willow had saved him when he'd tried to commit suicide in Xander's basement.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything, just borrowing.
Distribution: Want, take, have. Just let me know.
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He'd been so close to ending it all, ending the eternity and making all of his pain go away. But, no. The chit had to go and stop him. She had to be a humanitarian and all that rot. Didn't she know he wasn't human? Didn't she know that he would just be one less demon in their lives. Besides, what did she bloody care if he unlived or dusted himself? The rest of the damned White Hats didn't give a toss, so why would the redhead be any different? That's exactly what Spike wanted to know.
It had taken him nearly three days since that almost fatal night of self-loathing to find Willow alone. He didn't want to confront her with the entire Scooby Gang around. No doubt, they would just taunt and tease him as always, and right now, he was in no mood to deal with it. Chip or no chip, he would rip their bloody throats out. He was just in that type of mood.
He didn't want to admit it to himself, but he was grateful that the girl had saved him from the stake. Spike hadn't wanted to die; he had just been severely depressed that night. It was bad enough to have his bite taken away, but then.to add insult to injury, he was forced to wear Chubs' clothes. Those hideous shorts and the obnoxious Hawaiian shirt would have driven even the sanest of vampires mad.
Spike was brought out of his musings by a familiar scent. He would know that unique mixture of vanilla and innocence anywhere. It was Willow. She walked, unaccompanied, down the street. He could tell that she was by no means unaware of her surroundings. 'Good girl,' Spike thought, inwardly congratulating the girl for knowing how to walk at night in Sunnydale.
"Out for a stroll, Luv?" Spike asked, coming out from the shadows.
"Spike," Willow said, slightly shocked at seeing the blond vampire. She hadn't seen him since that night he had tried to kill himself, and she was beginning to wonder if he had found a more secluded place to do it. A part of her was glad to see that he hadn't met the sunlight, or a stake for that matter. The other part was just slightly annoyed at him for jumping out of the shadows like that, trying to scare her. "What do you want?"
Spike got in step with Willow as she began her trek back up the street. He glanced over at her, and saw that she was trying hard not to look over at him.
"Just a chat," Spike said, lighting a cigarette.
"Oh really? Since when do you just 'chat'?" Willow asked, disbelieving.
"A bloke can chat can't he? There isn't some bloody awful law against it, is there? Because, I'd break it you know. Evil and all."
"Right, chat away Spike."
"Well.," Spike began. He was amazed to find that he was actually at a loss of what to say. He knew what he wanted to ask her, but didn't want to come off like the Pouf, thanking her for her noble act and all that.
"Well what, Spike?" Willow asked, growing more impatient. She swore to herself that if he had come to cut her down one more time she would end his 'misery' for him.
"I just, well, thank you," Spike said, the last part hurried.
"What was that?"
"Bloody hell! Thank you!" Spike yelled in aggravation more at himself for having to say it again more so then the fact that she hadn't heard him.
"Oh," Willow said, shocked. "For what?"
"Can't just take it? Gotta ask why?"
"Well, um, you're welcome?"
Nodding, Spike took off. He didn't want to stay there, close to her, and have her laugh at him for his gratitude. He'd had enough of that in his life, thank you very much, and he didn't fancy a repeat. So, he'd left her. Inhaling, Spike could still smell the vanilla on the air. Closing his eyes, he continued to walk, inhaling unnecessary breaths just to capture that scent.
"Spike?" Willow's voice said, cutting through his euphoria. Somehow, he'd managed to walk right in the path of Willow.
"Did you forget something?" Willow asked confused.
Spike decided that he had and pulled her to him, being careful not to set off his chip, and crushed his lips to hers. When she opened her mouth to protest, Spike took the opportunity and slipped his tongue in, tasting all he could of her before he pulled away.
"Thanks, Luv."
The End