Willow woke up, a soft smile on her face. She looked at her lover,
watching him sleep. Her lover. She couldn't believe that she and Spike
had made love. She loved him so much it scared her. Almost. He had been
surprisingly gentle and caring throughout the entire experience. Her
body flushed as she remembered what they had done together.
 

Spike opened his eyes, smiling at seeing Willow watching him. He brought
a hand up and brushed her hair from her face. "Morning pet."
 

"Morning" she said softly, not sure what to say.
 

"You ok?" he asked, concern in his voice as his fingers brushed over the
bite on her neck.
 

"Never better" she replied honestly. "You?"
 

He laughed, shaking his head, "Bloody marvelous."
 

"I'm glad" she said, her eyes softening. "I love you Spike."
 

His face changed as he frowned, "No you don't. Last night was nice, Red.
It wasn't love though. You couldn't love someone like me."
 

Willow sat up, glaring at him, "Don't tell me what I can and can't do. I
love you. You, Spike. The you that I've gotten to know these last
months."
 

Spike snorted, running a hand through his hair. "I'm a demon, luv. An
evil murdering psychotic demon. Nice girls like you don't love guys like
me. We're good for a fuck, but that's it. Trust me on, pet."
 

Willow looked at him and was startled to see the honesty in his eyes. He
really believed what he was telling her. "No."
 

Spike moved from the bed, pulling his jeans on. "Fine. Don't trust me. I
don't care anyway. BUT, you don't love me. No one loves me."
 

"Run Spike. Isn't that what you're good at?" Willow asked, her eyes
shining angrily. She couldn't believe he had ruined what they had
shared. She had seen the look in his eyes as they had made love. He did
care about her. Hell, she'd thought he might even love her. Was she just
a fool? No. She knew what she had seen. He was just scared. Scared of
loving her. Of loving anyone.

Spike looked at her, his eyes narrowing dangerously, "Don't Red."
 

"Don't what? Don't love you? Too late for that one, Blondie. I've
already fallen too deep. Don't be honest? I'm not going to lie to you. I
don't want to lose you, Spike. I am not going to sit here and agree with
what you say. It's a bunch of lies. If it makes you feel better to
believe them, fine. But I won't admit to a bunch of lies. You running
away in fear is not going to make me love you less. It's just going to
make you awfully lonely."
 

"I said shut up" he hissed, not wanting to believe her words. "I don't
love you. This isn't some fairy tale with a happy ending. In my world,
there are no happily ever afters. Get use to that, Red. Love is for the
weak. I've never been weak."
 

"Run away, Spike. But remember this.
I'm not Drusilla. There is no one for you to compete with. It's only
you. In my heart...in my mind..in my soul." Willow took a deep breath
seeing the look in his eyes. "I also won't wait forever. By the time you
quit running, it might be too late."
 

Spike glared at her, lashing out from his own fear, "I'm not running.
I'm being honest, something you don't seem able to be. I bloody well
know you aren't Dru. You could never be what she is to me. She is my
moon...my reason for living. My sire and lover. Who are you? You're
nothing. A nice shag and a sweet kid. That's it. Nothing more."
 

Willow felt the tears in her eyes at his soft words. He was right. He
didn't love her. He loved Dru....always had and always would. He had
just lusted for her. That was it. No one wanted her. "Leave."
 

"Gladly" Spike said, turning. He felt his heart pierced as he heard her
quiet crying. He had hurt her. Something he had vowed never to do. He
straightened up as he left the room, closing the door on her tears.
 

FEAR AND LOVE (22/?)
 

Faith jumped when she heard the door slam. She had heard most of what
was being yelled in Willow's room. She smiled sadly, wishing there was
something she could do for the redhead. She wanted to go kick Spike's
ass, but her blindness prohibited such an action.
 

Angel heard Willow crying after Spike left. He wanted to go kick some
sense into his childe, but he knew he was partially to blame for the
younger man's actions. He and Drusilla had warped the lad over the
years. "Do you want me to check on her?"
 

Faith turned towards Angel's voice. She had forgotten he was there. She
shook her head. "No. She's upset. I can't belive that asshole."
 

"He isn't that bad" Angel defended his favorite grandchilde. "If it
means anything, he does love her."
 

Faith snorted, "He sure shows it well."
 

"Faith, he's a vampire. He's probably scared to death at what he's
feeling for her. Drusilla loved him, but she spoke to the stars. Her
love wasn't something he actually had to face and accept. It was more
admiration in a way."
 

"What about you? Did you love him?" Faith asked.
 

Angel sighed, "Again, it gets complicated. Vampires can love but few do.
Too human for most of us. It makes you weak. I cared for him in many
ways. Was it love? Probably if you want to call it that. Did I show him
love? No. He was a grandchilde. He amused me and I wanted him. I did
care...still do. Are you sure I shouldn't look in on her?"
 

"Leave her alone" Faith said. She heard the quiet sobbing, cursing her
slayer's senses. "She's hurt...she must have had sex with him."
 

"Yes" Angel agreed, having heard the soft moans as the two had coupled
throughout the afternoon.
 

"She loves him" Faith said simply.
 

"Yes, she does" Angel said.
 

"Why are men so stupid?" Faith asked, angry at the pain the girl was
going through. She had helped her more than she could ever guess. She
owed Willow so much. If not for her, she'd be dead or worse. Even after
she tried to push her away, Willow had helped.
 

"Just born that way" Angel said lightly. He watched Faith smile, glad to
see the girl actually looking happy.
 

"Yeah, you are" Faith said. She moved her feet over the side of the bed,
her body racing as she felt his hands on her arms.
 

"Lay down Faith" Angel said. "You aren't well enough to be walking
around."
 

"Shut up Dad" Faith said, standing. "I have to see Willow...well, not
see. Hell, you know what I mean. She's in pain. I have to be there for
her."
 

"I'll help" Angel said simply, seeing the determined look on Faith's
pretty face.
 

Faith nodded, allowing his arms to go around her. "Thank you."
 

*****************

"Feeling better?" Xander asked, looking at Anya.
 

"Yes" she replied, holding his hand tightly.
 

"When do you get out?" Buffy asked, sitting in the chair.
 

"Tomorrow. I have to be careful but Xander's agreed to nurse me."
 

Riley laughed, "Does he have a nice white uniform?"
 

"Watch it soldier boy" Xander warned playfully. He was so happy that
Anya was allright. He had never been more scared in his entire laugh as
he had been when she had been unconscious.
 

"I'm glad you're ok" Buffy said sincerely. She stood, breathing in from
the effort. "I'd better go get some rest."
 

"How are you doing?" Anya asked, watching the struggle the slayer was
having just standing alone.
 

"Been better but it isn't as bad as it was" Buffy said. "I thought it
was going away, but it hit me back twice as bad."
 

"Doctors still have no ideas?" Xander asked, his expression worried.
 

"No. They think it's mental. I don't know anymore what to think" Buffy
said, tears in her eyes. "But, I'll hush now. You need your rest,
especially if Xander's the one taking care of you."
 

"Be careful" Xander said softly.
 

Buffy smiled as she took Riley's arm, "Always, Xan. Take care of her."
 

"Come on, Buffy. Get well Anya" Riley called to the girl. "Later
Xander."
 

"Take care of her" Anya called out softly, watching them leave. She
squeezed Xander's hand, wondering what was wrong with Buffy.
 
 

FEAR AND LOVE (23/?)
 

Willow looked up, hope in her eyes as she heard the door open. She
smiled sadly when she saw Faith and Angel. She wiped her face, grinning
sheepishly, "Sorry..did I wake you?"
 

Faith moved to sit down, with Angel's help. She felt around for Willow's
hand, squeezing it. "No. I was awake. Are you ok?"
 

Willow sighed, looked at Angel. "You both heard?"
 

"He's an asshole. If I could, I'd stake him after kicking his ass" Faith
vowed.
 

"He was honest" Willow said. "I can't wish him death for that."
 

Angel sat at the edge of the bed, looking at her. "He does love you."
 

Willow shook her head, "No he doesn't. I'll never be Drusilla. She's the
only one he wants. I thought I might be able to get him to love me. But,
I know now I can't force him to feel something he doesn't."
 

"Guys" Faith said suddenly.
 

"What is it?" Willow asked.
 

Faith looked at her, a smile crossing her face. "I can see....I mean,
it's still real blurry but there is some light now!"
 

"Oh my god....are you sure?" Willow asked, forgetting about Spike.
 

"That's great" Angel said, smiling.
 

"What the fuck is happening?" Faith asked, a confused look on her face.
 

"I wish I knew" Willow said. "I mean, the entire gang is freaking out.
Buffy can barely walk, Riley is acting even goofier than usual, Xander
is turning into his dad, Anya has become a major klutz, Giles can barely
remember his name right now, you lost your eyes sight and I lost Spike."
 

"I told you, he loves you" Angel said. "Dru and I messed him up, Willow.
He's scared to fall in love."
 

"Scared? Aren't we all scared of something?" Willow asked, hating the
sad sound in her voice.
 

"Yes....but he is scared to death. He'd rather lose you than confess to
loving you" Angel said.
 

"Well, he lost her" Faith said, straining to make out any type of form.
 

"I love him Angel. I tried not to, but I do. I know you say he's scared,
but fear is no reason to lash out at me that way."
 

Angel ran a hand over his head, "I know. I won't make excuses for him.
He said some pretty harsh things, but it was what he was taught. That is
my fault. Mine and Drusilla's. We made him what he is."
 

Willow had frozen, her eyes widening as she thought about what they had
been saying. "No...."
 

"What is it?" Faith asked, turning towards her voice.
 

"Fear...." Willow said, looking at Angel. "I finally see it....My
god....we have to call the gang. We have to find out what is happening!"
 

"What are you talking about?" Angel asked, trying to follow her.
 

Willow looked at him, "Don't you get it? Fear. All of our fears. They've
come true. Xander turned into his father. Buffy is so weak she can't
even defend herself. Spike has fallen in love" she finished softly.
 

"My blindness! I don't want to depend on anyone but myself" Faith said,
knowing she had given in and let herself depend on not only Willow, but
Spike and Angel as well.
 

"Someone must have put a spell on us...or it's a prophecy or something"
Willow said, excited that she may have figured out what was happening to
all of her friends.
 

"I'll call Giles and the others. We need to research" Angel said, seeing
how her argument made sense. Someone had cast a spell on the scooby gang
to make their greatest fears come true.
 

******

Outside, the demon frowned. The redhead had figured it out. He had know
she would be the one to do so. But, where was the vampire? He was the
most important part of the damn spell. Without him, it was pointless.
The demon moved away from the house, not wanting to be spotted. He had
to rethink his plans. It had taken them less time to figure out about
the spell and more time to defeat it than he had anticipated. And the
damn vampire was nowhere to be found. It had to be the eight of them to
fully defeat the spell. Well, the demon suddenly smiled, it didn't have
to be defeated by them all. It could be fun if some still lingered in
fear. He felt a presence and sighed. Fine. None could linger. He'd find
the damn vampire and fix it. Or else he might be facing his own death.
 

FEAR AND LOVE (24/?)
 

Willow had decided to sleep in her parent's room. She couldn't stand to
go back to her bed, still scented from her and Spike's love making. She
wouldn't have been able to sleep at all, smelling and remembering. They
had decided to wait until morning to call the others. None of them had
realized that it was after two in the morning. No need to disturb them
with strange theories until they were all awake.
 

She couldn't sleep, even in another bed. Every time her eyes closed, she
saw his face as he had taken her. She felt his hands on her. Shaking her
head, she sat up in the large bed. She decided to spend the evening
thinking over her idea. Was it possible that someone had cursed them? It
seemed very likely, when she tied everything together. Strange things
finally seemed to go together. She had numerous questions in her mind.
Foremost being, Who and Why? What good would it do to have the entire
gang fighting their fears? She could understand Buffy and Faith. They
were the slayers. But why bring the others into it? And Spike...he
wasn't even really a part of the gang. Well, he was but he wasn't. He'd
deny being a part of them with his dying breath.
 

She placed pieces of the puzzle together in her mind as the minutes
ticked by. At least she had something to take her mind off of Spike and
all the terrible things that they had said to each other. She closed her
eyes, trying to remember a spell or curse that may have caused their
problems. Maybe Giles would know. Frowning, she thought over the last
few times she had seen the former watcher. It was lucky for them if he
remembered his name. Was it hopeless? She didn't want to believe that.
Between the eight of them, nine including Angel, maybe they could find
answers. She continued thinking, not even realizing that she was
drifting off to sleep.
 

***************

Faith laid down, her vision still blurry but starting to focus finally.
She felt brave so she looked at Angel. Or rather the hazy form that was
him to her eyes. "Why are you here?"
 

Angel glanced up, shaken from his thoughts by her abrubt question. "I
told you. I was worried."
 

Faith stared into his eyes. "Angel, we're old enough to be honest with
each other. Why are you here?"
 

Angel ran a hand through his hair, "I don't really know."
 

Faith nodded, smiling slightly, "That's honest. Come on. It's warm in
here. I could use a cold cover."
 

Angel smiled as he moved to lay beside her. He could see the fear and
uncertainty in her pretty face. She was scared to death about what was
happening. He spooned in behind her, his hand flat on her stomach. He
felt her relax, her breathing becoming more even.
 

"I think I'm falling in love with you" Faith said quietly, her fingers
playing across his hand.
 

"What?" Angel said, startled by her revelation.
 

"I don't want to, trust me." Faith assured him. "But...you make me feel.
That's something no one has ever been able to do."
 

"You're grateful" Angel said softly, wondering why it hurt that it
wasn't really love.
 

Faith snorted, "Trust me. I'm grateful to Willow. Doesn't mean I want to
be with her for the rest of my short life. It's you. You care. I enjoy
being with you. Does that scare you?"
 

Angel couldn't follow her thoughts, "What? No..I mean, I don't know. I
like you Faith, but I can't love you. The curse..."
 

Faith moved against him, her hair touching his face. She smiled as she
looked at him, "Curse smurse. I've had sex before. Been there done that.
It never compared to this."
 

"This?" he asked, his eyes burning into hers.
 

Her smiled deepened, "Just laying in the arms of someone that could love
me. I'd give up the sex to wake up beside you every morning....Gawd...I
sound so sappy....it must be something in the water..."
 

Any words she was planning on saying were caught by Angel's tender kiss.
She responded, enjoying the pleasure of his mouth on hers. She looked at
him as he pulled away. He smiled, "I could get use to having you
around...waking up with you in my arms...but I can't make any promises.
The curse..."
 

Faith put her finger against his lips. "Let's forget the curse...we can
just see what happens. No sex. This is better anyway. Just hold me."
 

Angel watched as she turned her head, snuggling against the pillow. He
kissed her cheek, wondering what had just happened between them. He
smiled softly laying his head beside hers and whispering, "Always."
 
 

FEAR AND LOVE (25/?)
 

Willow looked at the group as they sat down. She had been unable to contact
Spike, not really wanting to anyway. Not after last night. It was too fresh.
She saw the other's surprised looks at finding Faith and Angel sitting so
comfortably together on her couch. She wasn't sure what had happened the
night before she could see a happiness around them both that she was envious
of. The look of two people finding that they might be in love. She tore her
eyes off of them and looked into the questioning faces of her friends.
 

"How are you feeling Anya?" she asked, knowing the girl had just been
released from the hospital that morning.
 

"Like shit." Anya said bluntly before smiling softly at the girl, "But I'm
glad to be out."
 

"You were only there a few days" Xander said, his tone teasing.
 

"Are they always like this?" Faith asked, her nose scrunching up.
 

"Sickening isn't it?" Willow said dryly.

"HEY!" Xander said.
 

"They usually argue" Willow said, her smile dying a bit as she remembered the
trouble her friends had been through the last few weeks. "And then make up."
 

"I hate to interrupt," Buffy said, her eyes still on Faith sitting against
Angel. "But why are they here?"
 

Faith looked at Willow and then at Buffy. "I came here to apologize. Angel is
helping me..."
 

"She's trying to make ammends" Angel said, his voice cautious, his arm around
Faith protectively just in case Buffy tried something. He wondered when he
had finally let Buffy go. He had, he realized. Sitting opposite her, he was
glad that she seemed happy. As happy as he was.
 

"Really?" Buffy said, her gaze measuring as she looked at her former love and
her former enemy. She saw the way Angel was looking at Faith. It was the way
he used to look at her. She squeezed Riley's hand, feeling nothing but
happiness for her ex-lover. She had moved on. It was time he did too. If it
turned out to be Faith, well, she hoped he wasn't making a mistake. She
settled her eyes onto Faith's, "That might take awhile."
 

Faith nodded, tension radiating from her. "I know."
 

Buffy smiled slightly, "Fine. Wills, why are we here?"
 

Willow saw Faith relax and smiled proudly at Buffy. She was surprised her
friend had dealt so well with Faith. "I think someone put a curse or spell on
us."
 

"What?" Xander said, his face curious.
 

"I agree with Xander. What?" Giles echoed, looking intently at the redhead.
 

"Well, let me explain" Willow said softly, taking a deep breath.
 

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