NO IS A TWO LETTER WORD (1/1)
 

Willow walked into the kitchen, noticing that Buffy was already at the table.
She smiled, "Hey you."
 

"Willow," Buffy said as she looked up at her friend. She moved her spoon in
her cereal, watching the cocoa puffs start to get soggy.
 

"We're almost out of milk," Willow said as she poured her cereal. "We so need
to go grocery shopping today."
 

"Yeah, we're running out of a lot of things," Buffy said, covering a yawn.
She hadn't been able to sleep the night before, not after getting her
unexpected surprise.
 

"Is something wrong?" Willow asked as she sat down opposite her friend. She
took a bite of her food, watching as Buffy continued to stir her cereal.
 

"Why do you ask?" Buffy asked, giving Willow a look.
 

"You're acting weird," Willow said, giving Buffy a worried look.
 

Buffy sighed, running a hand through her hair. "Willow, we're best friends
aren't we?"
 

"Of course," Willow said, "the best."
 

"And you know that you can tell me anything, that I'll support you no matter
what," Buffy said, giving Willow a pointed look.
 

"I know that. And you know that you can tell me anything too," Willow said,
taking a drink of her orange juice.
 

"Have you heard from Tara?" Buffy asked suddenly, realizing that Willow was
not going to volunteer the information.
 

"No," Willow said, her tone short as she felt a slight prickle of guilt. Not
even a month and she had moved on. And she had thought that she and Tara
belonged together, were meant to be. Showed how much she knew.
 

"I'm sorry," Buffy said sincerely. "I know that you cared a lot about her."
 

"I loved her," Willow said, shrugging. "Guess it just wasn't enough for her."
 

"Some people don't realize what they have until they lose it," Buffy said
quietly, thinking about her mother.
 

"It's not as bad as it was," Willow said honestly. "I'm getting over it, but
it still hurts when I think about it."
 

"It'll get easier," Buffy said, studying Willow intently. "With time, you'll
move on and find someone else."
 

"Really?" Willow said, looking down at her cereal and away from Buffy's
studying gaze. "I'll keep that in mind."
 

"I'm sure you will," Buffy said, tapping her spoon on the rim of her bowl.
She finally sighed, "Willow, I know."
 

Willow looked up, "You know what?"
 

"How is Spike?" Buffy asked, watching Willow's face turn white as her green
eyes widened.
 

"Um, how would I know?" Willow asked, hoping that Buffy was merely playing a
hunch.
 

"Well, since I saw him leaving your room at four o'clock this morning, I
figured you might know how he was doing," Buffy said with a smug smile.
 

"You saw him?" Willow whispered, leaning back in her chair.
 

"Yep. With his hair mussed and his shirt unbuttoned. Trust me when I say that
there is no way you will convince me that you two did not have sex last
night," Buffy said, having spent hours trying to think of answers to her many
questions.
 

"I would never lie to you, Buffy," Willow said quietly, "even if I wanted to
do nothing but lie."
 

"You and Spike?" Buffy asked, trying to understand. She pushed her bowl away,
"Is it new?"
 

"Yes," Willow said, her appetite lost. "I haven't been hiding it from you.
Hell, there isn't really anything to hide."
 

"You are fucking Spike in my house, just down the hall from me, and you say
there isn't anything to hide?" Buffy asked, not angry just irritated.
 

"That's all it is," Willow said with a frown, "just sex. And just since last
week, when you and Dawn were on your trip."
 

"How?" Buffy asked. "I'm really trying to come to grips with this, Willow,
without finding him and staking his ass. Tell me that he means something to
you, that he didn't force you into this, that you have feelings for him,
anything to keep me from doing something stupid."
 

"Don't stake him!" Willow said, not liking the idea of not having Spike
around.
 

"I'm sorry, but I am a slayer. When he's just around to help, it's one thing.
When he's fucking my best friend, it's another thing entirely," Buffy said,
making a face.
 

"He didn't force me into anything," Willow said, rolling her eyes as she
smiled suddenly. "I can't believe I'm sitting here explaining myself to you.
You're a bit young to be my mother."
 

"Guess I can't use that whole 'this is my house so you better explain
yourself' bit either huh?" Buffy said with her own smile. "I love you,
Willow. You're my best friend in the entire world. I'd do anything for you,
even put up with Spike if he's what you want. I just....I just can't
understand. I mean, last time I checked you were into girls."
 

"Yeah, I was," Willow said, sighing. "I don't understand it myself. I mean, I
don't know if it was that I was into girls really. I was just into Tara. I
never really considered myself gay or straight or any other nice and neat
little generic classification. I'm just me. I loved Oz and I loved Tara.
Spike? Well, he makes me feel things that I never thought I'd feel again. He
needs me for some reason, and I need him."
 

"How did it happen?" Buffy asked, honestly curious.
 

"He came over here because Giles sent him to check on me. We started fighting
and before I knew it, we were up against the living room wall," Willow
trailed off.
 

"I so did not need that visual image," Buffy said, making a face. "So, you
both got carried away with some lust that was bigger than the both of you?"
 

"Yeah," Willow said, shrugging. "I couldn't say no, it happened. Since then,
he's been coming to me at night. We never talk, but the sex is amazing."
 

"You couldn't say no?" Buffy repeated, giving Willow a look. "I thought you
were the smart one, Wills. No is a two letter word. N. O. Very easy to
pronounce. Why don't you try it? N....O..."
 

"Buffy," Willow rolled her eyes. "It's a bit late for that. And, for the
record, I can say no."
 

"Just not to Spike?" Buffy clarified. "Don't answer that. Again with the
visual that is so not appealing."
 

"I don't even like him," Willow whispered, her eyes looking at the table,
"not really. Yet, I can't stop thinking about him lately."
 

"An obsessive sexual fantasy thinking or a do we have a chance beyond the bed
kind of thinking?" Buffy asked, leaning over and resting her chin on her hand
as she looked at Willow.
 

"I don't know," Willow sighed, giving Buffy a sheepish smile. "Is it stupid
of me to have started having this affair with him?"
 

"I would never call you stupid," Buffy said, sighing, "but I wouldn't say it
was the smartest thing you had ever done. I mean, good sex or not, he's still
Spike. There's still some danger there."
 

"I know," Willow shook her head, "I think that might be part of the
excitement. I know that he can't kill me because of the implant, but there's
still so much power in him. He's so strong, but he's so gentle with me.
Goddess, I really fucked up this time."
 

"I'm sorry," Buffy said, moving to stand behind Willow. She leaned over and
hugged her best friend, "You know, if you need to talk, I'm here. I just
don't want him to hurt you. You've been through so much this last year."
 

"You've been through more," Willow reminded softly, looking at Buffy.
 

"But I'm the slayer. I'm strong enough to handle it all," Buffy said with a
brave smile.
 

"You might be the slayer, but you're not in this world alone. It's strange,
but talking it helps," Willow said, smiling. "This last week I thought I was
going crazy, not able to be completely truthful with you."
 

"I told you, Willow. You're my best friend. You can tell me anything. I might
not like it or approve, but I can adjust. That's what friends do," Buffy
said, moving to take a seat.
 

"I never meant for it to be a secret, not really. It was just new and I
wasn't sure what it exactly was and I felt stupid telling you that I was so
weak and lonely that I had sex with Spike. Then, it happened again and I was
even more confused. I don't know what it is or where it might go, if it will
even go anywhere. Right now, it's just sex," Willow made a face. "Who knows?
Are you going to tell anyone else?"
 

"It's not really any of my business," Buffy said, smiling, "though my
behavior today might suggest otherwise. I was just worried about you, and had
to make sure you were OK and knew what you were doing."
 

"I'm not sure I know what I'm doing, but I will remember your advice next
time," Willow said.
 

"Advice?" Buffy asked.
 

"That no is a two letter word that is easy to pronounce," Willow said,
laughing softly.
 

"Oh, that," Buffy laughed, "good advice that should definitely be remembered.
OK, I'll let you off the hook now. We can forget midnight visitors and
vampires sneaking in for nookie. Today, we're shopping."
 

"Yep, I've made a grocery list. I just need to add milk," Willow said,
getting to her feet and grabbing her bowl and Buffy's of uneaten cereal and
moving to the sink.
 

"And maybe some concealer for that bite mark on your neck," Buffy said with a
smile. "That is, if you're wanting to keep this affair between you and Spike
secret until you know where it's going."
 

"Yeah, concealer might be nice," Willow nodded, her fingers touching the mark
on her neck. "We need to get Dawn up or that lazy bones will spend all day in
bed."
 

Buffy smiled, glad that she and Willow had discussed the truth about Spike,
but still trying to deal with her natural distrust and dislike of the
vampire. She remembered the look on his face the night before, knowing that
he could not have faked the emotion. Maybe, just maybe, he really did care
about Willow. For her friend's sake, she hoped he did. Willow deserved so
much yet all she had gotten was hurt. Third time was the charm, Buffy thought
with a small smile as she got up. "Yeah, let's wake Dawn up then we can get
dressed and get the groceries bought."
 

"Sounds like a good plan," Willow said, following Buffy to the stairs.

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