What Was Once Lost

Author: Jami

Email: aresangel1@yahoo.com

Parts: 21 - 30

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

~Part: 21~

"So William, how is our little captive?" asked Angelus leisurely. Spike groaned and fell into the chair that Drusilla had vacated earlier.

"She's determined to make this hard on herself. She won't listen, sure she does as I tell her, but whenever I bring up our past, she either argues with me, or says nothing at all. Bloody infuriating, that is." Angelus smirked.

"Well, then you have a choice to make, my boy. You need to decide whether she's worth all this trouble."

"No choice in the matter, sire. I need her." Angelus nodded, accepting his answer, brushing away the topic with a wave of his hand.

"Be prepared to start packing. I'm going out tonight to look for better accommodations. We'll move as soon as possible." Spike agreed and tensed when his sire became extremely serious.

"We need to consider how to handle the slayer. She's weak right now, because of losing her *Angel*," he spat the word like a curse. "She's grieving, but soon she'll figure out that Willow is missing, if she or the boy haven't already. I didn't leave any clues that I was responsible for her disappearance, but they'll automatically assume it was me. They don't know about your involvement with her, except for the watcher. He may become a problem."

"If we kill any of them, and my Red finds out, she'll never listen to me. I won't have any chance to make her understand how much I need her," Spike pleaded.

"I know, that's why this is such a problem. We may just have to let her go," he mused.

"What!?" exclaimed the outraged blonde. "You can't tell me we went to all this sodding trouble to just give up." His sire cut him off, prepared for his objection.

"That isn't what I meant Spike. We need to make them believe that nothing is wrong. We need to have her talk to them, even if it's just a phone call. If she disappears without a trace, then the slayer will come banging down our doors. What I am suggesting is that you have Willow call one of her friends, make sure she doesn't try anything smart. Just have her let them know she is fine. She won't be in school for awhile, come up with a good excuse for her absence. When she has learned the rules and begins to accept everything, she will be allowed to leave during the day, when she proves she can be trusted. That way they will be able to see her, know for a fact that she is fine."

Spike agreed, seeing what Angelus meant. He knew he was right, but the thought of letting her out of his sight scared him.

"Might as well go, explain to your girl what needs to be done, what's expected from her. I want her to make that phone call tonight, preferably to the slayer, so she doesn't get stake-happy. And she *must* act surprised when they tell her of my.change." Spike nodded and walked out.

~~~*~~~

Drusilla was humming, it always relaxed her constantly active mind. She glided her fingers through the girl's soft, red hair, transfixed by the color in the candlelight. Poor dear, she was still so confused. But Spikey would make it all better, then they could be a happy family again.

Willow slowly woke at the feeling of someone petting her. Her eyes blinked rapidly, trying to adjust to her surroundings again. She finally registered that there was a woman sitting next to her. Drusilla.

"Wakey, wakey poppet," she cooed, pulling the girl into a sitting position. Willow pulled away slightly at her touch and Dru frowned.

"What's the matter, deary?"

"Uh.nothing. I.I just want to home."she whispered.

Spike froze, at the sound of a quiet conversation in his room. He decided to wait, let the girls finish their talk.

"You are home, sweet. With your family, with all of us."

"But.but you aren't my family. I have my parents, and my friends, they are my family. You and Spike have been really nice," she added at Drusilla's pouting. "but Angelus, to be truthful, he scares me. I don't feel comfortable here." She only told her this because Dru always seemed more willing than the men to listen to what she really had to say.

"There is something I must share with you, lovey. Angelus may seem frightening, but he cares for you. He brought you to us because you belong with us, all of us. I know you do not wish to hurt us, but ignoring Spike, it hurts him. He wants nothing more than to love you, precious. Spend some time with him, just listen, get to know him. Our boy is truly extraordinary. You may not love him now, but give him a chance. He loves you more than you could know. Let him in. None of us want you to think that you are a prisoner here, not even Angelus, but he won't tell you that," she added with a grin.

Drusilla paused, sensing Spike standing outside the door. She looked into the child's emerald eyes.

"Do me a favor?" she asked politely. At her nod she continued.

"Spend less time worrying about the future, and live in the present. Do what makes you happy, but at least give happiness a chance."

"I will," Willow replied. Drusilla made some good points. It surprised her that a vampire who had been driven insane by her evil sire over one hundred years ago could be so lucid at times.

The brunette smiled and kissed her forehead. She left the girl on her own as she walked into the hallway, closing the door behind her. She beamed at Spike as he rested outside the door.

The blonde returned her gaze with a grateful smile of his own.

"Thanks Dru," he said softly, touched at her attempt to help him.

"No problem, pet." She then went in search of Angelus.

~~~*~~~

Spike walked into his room, his eyes immediately falling on the redhead's lithe form.

"Need you to do me a favor, luv." She looked to him and hesitantly nodded. "Good, I want you to give the slayer a call."

She looked at him again, that was the one statement she wasn't expecting. Only one word came to mind, "Huh?"

~Part: 22~

"The slayer," he repeated slowly, as if speaking to a two year old. "Give her a ring, pet."

"Umm, not that I mind, but why?"

"Well, it's like this luv, the nosy slayer will eventually realize, once she stops all her whining and crying over that ponce, Angel; that you're missing. I don't want your bloody friends sneaking around me and mine, so you will call her. You'll tell her that you are fine, and you won't be in school for awhile. You need to come up with a good excuse for your absence, though."

"What's to stop me from telling her where I am, and who I am with?" she asked defiantly. He smirked and dropped into his bed, close but not too close.

"You could try, but I don't recommend it, pet. You see, then I'd have to tell Angelus, and you'd have to be punished. Plus, if your mates knew we had you, we'd have to kill them. Simple as that," he responded coolly. She shivered at the calmness in his voice, the hard expression on his face.

Spike's visage softened when he saw he had gotten through to her.

"Don't wanna hurt you," he mumbled. "But I will do what I have to, to keep you with me. Don't make me, luv. I don't want to see you in pain." She snorted indignantly.

"Nice to know somebody cares." He looked at her in confusion.

"We all care about you, ducks. None of us want to harm you," he assured her.

"Oh yeah, Angelus has made it perfectly clear that he can't wait to discipline me," she retorted.

"You've got him all wrong. Angelus, he demands obedience, from everyone. His childer, his pets, minions, it doesn't matter. He thinks of you as family, but he knows that when it comes to you, Dru and I can't bring ourselves to cause you pain, even if it's for your own good."

He scooted closer to her, taking her small hand in his.

"Think of him as the father figure, if you will. He cares for you, but knows that you need rules, need to stay in line. So he will do whatever it takes to get through to you. He may come across as harsh, but he does worry about you. Trust me, if he didn't care about you, he would have let you leave this morning. He wouldn't bother with the threats. You're not his pet; he has nothing to directly gain from your being here. He does it because he knows how much I need you here, with me. Don't test him, pet. He may not want to hurt you, but he will if he deems it necessary."

She nodded soberly.

"What do you need me to say?" she asked; her voice barely above a whisper. He smiled, his hand releasing hers, instead raising it to her face to trace the curve of her jaw.

"Tell the slayer that you will be staying with family for the next couple weeks, some emergency or something. Make it good. Also, she will most likely tell you about Angel's turning, so you have to act surprised, since you've been out of town and all. Got it?"

"Yeah, I got it." He rose from his spot on the bed and pulled out a cell phone from a pocket in his duster. She raised her eyebrow, amazed that he, of all people, had a cell phone.

"What?" he whined defensively. "Gotta keep up with times, I *am* a modern vampire after all." She laughed softly, he smiled genuinely.

Willow dialed Buffy's phone number, part of her hoping she wasn't home. That she could avoid lying to her best friend. Her stomach flip-flopped when she heard the blonde answer the phone quietly, obviously distressed.

"Hello?" answered Buffy.

"H-Hey, Buff. It's me, Wills." The slayer smiled absently through her tears at her friend's ramble.

"Oh, Will. I don't know what I am going to do."

"W-What are you talking about? What's the matter?"

"Didn't you talk with Xander? He said he called you."

"He might have, but I'm not home right now."

"Huh?" responded the slayer, "Where are you?"

"Oh, I-I." she stuttered, it was now or never. One look at Spike rid her of the temptation to tell her friend of her true whereabouts. On the surface he was tense, menacing. But his eyes, they were filled with worry and doubt. He was scared she would leave. She didn't know why, but she didn't want to be the one responsible for his sadness.

"My mom came back from her business trip early," she replied, the lies coming out surprisingly easy. "My aunt passed away, we had to leave for her funeral. We had to leave in a hurry. We probably won't be back for quite some time. But, what happened? What was Xander supposed to tell me?" she asked, switching topics swiftly.

"Angel." she whispered, her voice heavy with tears. "He's gone."

"G-Gone? What do you mean g-gone?"

"He, he's evil, Wills. He lost his soul. I-I just d-don't know how it h-happened." Willow's heart clenched at her friend's despair.

"I'm so sorry, Buffy. I-I wish I was there, so I could be there for y-you." Buffy sniffled.

"S'okay, Wills. It's probably better that you aren't anywhere near him. He tried to kill Cordy last night. You're safer where you are." If you only knew, Willow thought.

"You, you should get some rest, Buff. I should go, I'll call you soon, ok?"

"Yeah," she replied softly. "Bye Wills."

"Bye, sleep well." Willow hit the end button on his phone and handed it back to Spike. She wished she could comfort her poor friend.

"Nicely done, Red," interjected Spike, pulling her out of her thoughts. She looked up. He seemed uneasy because of her unhappiness, but there was an underlying sense of relief now that she made her call.

"I'm feeling a bit peckish, luv. Gotta go out for a bit. Stay in here, I'll be back soon." She nodded and watched him leave.

Willow got up from her spot on the bed, walking slowly, her feet dragging on the ground. She searched the bookcase for something to keep her entertained. Her eyes lit up when she saw a copy of  "To Kill a Mockingbird", her favorite book.

She sat in the lone chair that sat in her bedroom, preparing to sit comfortably and read for the rest of the evening.

The redhead was surprised when she heard the door that Spike had left through only a minute earlier, open. Without even looking up she said,

"Well, that sure was fast. Couldn't wait to get back?" she added with a small laugh. She heard a husky chuckle that most definitely did not belong to Spike.

"Well, I wouldn't blame my boy for running back home quickly, what with a treat like you waiting for him."

"Angelus," she acknowledged before she went back to her reading. She didn't want to have a confrontation with him, and she knew if she spoke with him, anger would get the better of her. After her talk with Buffy, hearing how heartbroken the blonde was, and how Angelus tried to kill Cordy, she was in no mood for a friendly chat with him.

He plucked the book from her hands as he walked past her, annoyed that she was ignoring him. He sat on the edge of the bed, watching her intently. He could see there was something about him that irked her.

"How is sweet Buffy doing, I know you spoke with her," his voice was mocking and unfeeling. He reveled in the hurt he caused.

"She's dejected and practically inconsolable. But I'm sure you already know that." He grinned smugly.

"Yeah," he added with a grin. Silence lingered on as she refused to look in his direction, instead choosing to focus on the floor. He growled when she still ignored him.

"What is your problem?" he snapped.

"My problem?!" she asked incredulously. "You hurt my best friend, you tried to kill Cordy, and you are holding me captive, and you wonder what my problem is?!" He sighed in exasperation.

"What do you expect from me? I'm evil! I won't apologize since I don't feel sorry for any of it."

"I don't expect anything from you. But I was really hoping for a quiet evening, so, if you could." she answered, gesturing to the door. He smirked at her dismissal.

"All right, Willow. I'll leave you to your reading. Just so you know, as of now, your little pals are safe, only because Spike is worried about how their deaths might effect you. But give me a reason, and they'll be dead before sunrise of that day."

"Why?" she asked hesitantly, as he headed for the door. He turned and raised a quizzical eyebrow. She clarified, "Why are you willing to leave them be?"

He smiled at her question, "Because, believe it or not Wills, you're family, and I'll do anything for my family."

~Part: 23~

Spike came back home rather quickly, not wanting to leave his redhead alone for too long. He was surprised to see her sitting quietly, a book in front of her, she was staring at it, but she was obviously lost in thought.

  "What's got your brain goin' a mile a minute, pet?" he asked. Her eyes rose slowly to meet his face, seeing a trace of amusement.

  "Nothing, just thinking," she replied with a shrug of her shoulders. He smiled at their easy banter and approached her, crouching down when he was in front of her, so he could look in her eyes.

  "Come on, luv. Tell Spike what you're thinkin'." he persuaded with a twinkle in his eyes.

  "I was just thinking about Angelus. He's.unique." He snorted.

  "Unique? Oh, he'd love that. He's been called many things, pet, unique has never been one of them. Why do you say that?"

  "Well, he came in here a while ago. He was taunting me about Buffy, things like that. But we talked, well, we didn't yell, but there was a definite difference of opinion there. But, it seemed like he actually cared about me. It was just.weird. Not a bad thing necessarily, just, unexpected."

  "That's Angelus for ya, always gotta keep you on your toes. I wouldn't worry about it."

  "Wasn't worried. Just got me thinking, that's all." He grinned and stood. He gently pried the book from her hands and pulled her up.

  "This is.odd," she said, gesturing to the two of them.

  "How is that, Red?"

  "Well.this, us. Talking with you, feeling comfortable here. It just seems like I should be crying and begging you to let me go, but I'm not scared of you. Is there something wrong with me?"

  He laughed and brought her into his arms, holding her close to him. Her first impulse was to pull away, but she didn't. His embrace was pleasantly comforting.

  "There's nothing wrong with you Willow," he assured her. "This is bigger than both of us. I'll be the first to admit that things could have gone better, but you're here, and at least you're willing to give me a chance. I don't want to make this arrangement difficult for you."

  "I know," she added softly. He rested his chin on her head, smiling at her lack of resistance. "Believe it or not, but Drusilla helped my understand that. She was surprisingly.sane."

  He chuckled, "She has her moments." He sighed, finally feeling at ease.

  "I've missed this, just holding you. I know you don't remember everything, but there would be times, like this, when we would be happy just to be with each other. We'd talk about anything and nothing, hell, sometimes we wouldn't talk at all. They were some of the best times I remember," he murmured, thinking of the past.

  Spike pulled away slightly, keeping her in his arms, but now being able to look into her eyes. Willow saw his heated gaze flicker to her mouth, and hesitantly moved closer to him. He leaned into her, brushing his lips lightly against hers.

  She didn't feel any urge to leave his embrace as she surrendered to the feel of his lips against hers. She sighed in contentment, unintentionally deepening the kiss. Spike's grip tightened as he began to move them away from the corner of his room, and closer to his bed.

  He loosened his desperate hold on her as he gave her a chance to breathe. He placed soft kisses on her cheek and neck. She opened her eyes, taking in everything around her. If she wanted to stop this, the time was now.

  The vampire stopped his attention on her neck and looked at her intently, silently questioning her. She smiled and he felt so relieved. He walked her to their bed, laying her down as he loomed above her.

  She tentatively reached for him, with a light grip on his t-shirt, she pulled him forward, initiating an uncertain kiss. He grinned against her mouth and let his hand slide down from her shoulders, resting eventually on her waist, tugging gently at the ties that held her blouse together.

  Pulling back to allow her much needed air, he began to feel uncharacteristically nervous.

  "Are.are you sure, luv? I.if you're not ready."

  She raised her hand, her finger resting on his lips, immediately shushing him.

  "Please, Spike." she breathed, too caught up in the moment to think of anything else but him.

  That was all the encouragement he needed.

~Part: 24~

Drusilla sat quietly, leisurely brushing her precious doll's hair. Things were going well in her home. Daddy had found them a brand new house, a mansion at that, and they were moving that night. They didn't need to pack much, just clothes and personal items. Whatever furniture was in the warehouse would stay there; their new home was already furnished.

  She was blissfully happy, she had her Angelus back, Spike was beginning to truly feel like himself again, and Willow was slowly but surely allowing them a part in her life.

  The dark vampiress grinned when she heard her sire come into their room. The sun had risen about a half an hour ago and he was just now getting to sleep. He had spent the entire night out, avoiding the slayer, preparing their new home, and feeding. All in all, he had a very productive evening.

  Angelus joined his childe on their bed, encouraging her to release her grip on her doll and join him. She placed Miss Edith on the night table and curled up into his embrace. Her mind began to wander, as it usually did. She giggled absently and Angelus shifted so he could look at her face, curious at to what made her laugh.

  "What is it, baby?" he inquired, soothingly running his fingers through her hair.

  "Miss Edith told me such delicious things. Want to know what she said?" she asked coyly.

  "Of course, love." She pressed against him, her mouth finding his ear as she whispered to him.

  "Our Spikey showed the little tree how much he missed her. She's happy, but so confused. I worry that when she wakes she will push him away," she frowned at the thought.

  "Don't worry so much, Dru. It will be fine," he assured her. Waiting a beat, he then began to chuckle lightly. "So, Spike finally got some, maybe he'll be less of a downer now."

  "Leave him alone," she reprimanded. "He just missed his girl, like you missed me.right, my Angel?"

  "Oh yeah, baby," he said with a sly grin, pulling her into a passionate kiss that would leave her breathless.well, figuratively.

~~~*~~~

  Willow had been awake for maybe fifteen minutes, simply studying the blonde vampire beside her. Her face took on a rosy hue as she remembered how she had spent her night. She couldn't believe she actually slept with Spike.

  She was having an increasingly difficult time staying mad at him and his sire when he was always so nice to her. Even though her time with Angelus was considerably less than pleasant, Spike had gone out of his way to make her feel at home. Drusilla never caused her any problems; she only forced her to trust her feelings. But part of her missed research nights at the library, or listening to Xander's stupid jokes, she just missed her friends. And poor Buffy needed her. She needed someone to listen to her, and tell her everything would get better. She loved Xander dearly, but he wouldn't sympathize with the slayer. He had always hated Angel, now he had a real reason. So he wouldn't be a good sounding board.

  It had only been a couple of days, but she was well aware that she wouldn't be leaving Spike's watchful eye anytime soon. She knew they would be leaving this place soon. She wasn't sure where the new house was, but she welcomed a change from the relatively dreary surroundings.

  Her mind wandered back to her companion. She didn't know what to do about him. He was so caring but at the same time, he *was* holding her prisoner. You're not supposed to fall for your kidnapper, it's just not right. This entire situation didn't make sense.

  The redhead was so caught up in her conflicting and increasingly confusing thoughts that she never realized that Spike had woke. He had been sleeping, quite peacefully for the first time in what felt like decades, when he felt her gaze fall on him. He feigned sleep, watching her with narrow eyes.

  He knew she was going to feel dazed, unsure of what she was feeling. But he knew now, more than ever, that he wouldn't let her go. He saw doubt and worry cross her face and decided then and there to put an end to her upsetting thoughts.

  She jumped when she felt his arms slide around her waist, his grip tightening, pulling her against him. She made no move to look at him, focusing on the wall past his shoulder. She finally dared to look him in the eye. He had an amused look across his face at her avoidance of him.

  "Umm, how long have you been awake?" she asked shyly.

  "Not long," he replied with an easy smile. He brushed her hair away from her face and placed a kiss on her forehead. She began to relax in his arms and he felt immense relief. She went to say something, to put a stop to their casual behavior, her insecurities getting the better of her. He stopped her protests with a swift kiss on her lips, leaving her with no other choice than to actively participate.

  He pulled away slightly, just to give her time to breathe.

  "Better ways to spend the day than arguing," he informed her as he leaned down, closer to her. She nodded distractedly and met his lips with her own. They were about to progress with more fun activities when a loud knock on the door caused them to break apart.

  "Wake up, sleepyheads!" announced an overly chipper voice. They both recognized Angelus as the owner of said annoying voice. "Gotta get a move on kiddies. It's moving day!" he added with a laugh.

  Willow couldn't contain a laugh when she saw Spike slide out of bed, throwing on a pair of black denim jeans quickly, zipping them but leaving them unbuttoned, muttering something about 'bloody poofs' and 'horrendous timing'.

  He hurled open the door, glaring menacingly at his grinning sire.

  Angelus tried very hard to hold in a chuckle at his boy's expression. He took a good look at the blonde, noting the hastily thrown on pants and the fact that his usually slicked back hair was curly and sticking up in various places. He glanced past his childe's angry form to look at Willow, who was currently sitting in Spike's bed, sheet wrapped around her protectively, with an expression combined with amusement and nervousness. He gave her a quick wink and returned his attention to his boy, who was now scowling at him.

  "Oh, I'm *so* sorry!" he apologized, without even attempting to hide the smirk on his face. "Did I interrupt something?" he added feigning innocence.

  Spike merely growled. Angelus rolled his eyes.

  "Get over it Spike," he insisted. "We move into the mansion tonight. I let you sleep the morning and most of the afternoon away. Time to get going. I suggest that you clean up and join Drusilla and me in the main room, and then we can start moving things over. Minions will do most of the work," he added with a shrug.

  "Yeah, yeah, I'm going Peaches," the blonde mumbled, turning away slightly. Angelus looked over Spike's shoulder again.

  "You too, Red," he told her, eyeing at her openly. He chuckled softly at the blush that overcame the shy girl and couldn't hold in the laughter when Spike slammed the door in his face.

  "You've got ten minutes," he warned with a smile, "Don't make me come and get you!"

~Part: 25~

"Come on Red, let's get going!" beckoned Angelus from the lounge room in the mansion. They had moved in that night, as soon as the sun set. All of the main rooms were furnished already. Angelus had made previous arrangements to make sure things were perfect. All they had to do with move in all their personal items, clothes, things like that. They had finally gotten settled around 9 pm.

  Drusilla then ordered them to take her niece shopping. Willow had noticed rather quickly that she had barely any clothes of her own since her kidnapping. To top that off, Drusilla had also decided that she was going to stay home, have a tea party. But she had insisted that both Angelus and Spike take the girl out. Needless to say, Angelus was not a happy vampire. Taking a teenager shopping was not his idea of a good night, but it wouldn't be complete torture, if the girl would just get down there already!

  "Will you get a move on, pet?!" pleaded Spike from the stairway, pulling the reluctant redhead behind him.

  "But Spike, I *hate* shopping, this wasn't even my idea! I know you don't want to go, so why can't we just stay in?" she whined.

  "I don't know, luv. I've been thinking about all the lovely things we could get ya. Leather, definitely getting some leather." he mumbled to himself. Angelus snickered when he saw the embarrassed and annoyed look on her face.

  "NO leather!" she commanded.

  "Aw, why not?" he complained, "You'd look smashing I'd wager."

  "Well, I." she considered his statement, but stopped her oncoming thoughts at the look of amusement on Angelus' face. "Let's just get this over with, okay?" Spike sighed and they joined Angelus, making their way to his Desoto. As they left, he couldn't resist.

  "But, maybe some leather." his appeal was met with a swift smack to the back of his head from his sire. "Alright, alright, I get it."

~~~*~~~

  "Why did we need to take the car? The mall is only a couple blocks away."

  "Because," Angelus answered with an exasperated sigh, he so hated questions, "we aren't going to the mall, well, not *that* mall."

  "Where are we going?" asked the curious girl.

  "Los Angeles," answered Spike, taking over for his sire, knowing he was quickly growing tired of answering her never-ending questions.

  "What?! Why?" she exclaimed.

  "Well, pet, it's like this. Your little friends think you are out of town, so you can't just go for a stroll in the mall and have them run into you. Besides, you're with Angelus and me, that would leave them with more questions than answers."

  "Okay," she acknowledged his argument, "but L.A.'s a couple hours away. How are we going to get there, go shopping, and make it back before sunrise?"

  "We aren't," he replied simply. Seeing that it wouldn't satisfy her ever growing curiosity, he began, "We're staying for the day. Angelus set us up with a nice hotel room, and all, consider it a vacation."

  "Oh," she stated, run out of things to ask. Angelus was relieved when silence once again filled the car.

~~~*~~~

  It was nearing midnight when they arrived in the city, and all the usual shopping stops were closed for the night. But one might be amazed what a little flash of fang could persuade a person to do. Angelus had got them into one of the larger department stores. He wandered off, browsing through the merchandise, seeing if there was anything that he wanted. Spike led Willow in the other direction, into the women's department.

  The dark-haired vampire got bored rather quickly, not understanding why he was even here in the first place. He found Spike a few minutes later, waiting for the redhead outside a fitting room.

  "I'm outta here. Gonna grab a bite to eat, then I'm going back to the hotel," he informed him.

  "Yeah," Spike nodded absentmindedly, "Won't be much longer here, we'll be at the room in a couple hours or so." His sire stalked out of the store, in search of someone to curb his hunger.

~~~*~~~

  About an hour later, Spike threw all the bags into the trunk of his car, glad to be done with that. Willow had found a few outfits that she liked, they were definitely a change from her usual fuzzy sweaters and overalls, but at the same time, they were still her. Spike even managed to convince her to buy a pair of leather pants, much to his delight. She had simply rolled her eyes at his antics.

  "Can we go to the hotel, Spike? I'm tired." He gave her a slight smile.

  "Not yet, my love. There's something I want to show you." They drove for awhile, he gave her no clue to where they were going.

  The car finally stopped in a deserted parking lot. Spike got out of the driver's seat and walked to her door, opening it and reaching a hand out for her to take. She did so and they walked hand in hand down a worn path away from the lot. She never asked where they were going, knowing he wouldn't answer her.

  She finally took a look at her surroundings. They were on a beach, off the main road. She took off her shoes as they reached the sand, he had left his duster in the car, knowing it would only get dirty. He led her by the shore, walking slowly, basking in the glow of the full moon above.

  There was a large piece of driftwood lying on the sand. He sat down, pulling her into his lap. She turned to look up at him.

  "Where are we?"

  "A private beach near the Santa Monica Pier."

  "It's beautiful tonight," she commented dreamily.

  "That it is," he agreed, never once taking his eyes off her. She blushed and shifted so she was held more tightly in his arms, allowing the relaxing sound of waves rolling in and out calm her.

  "Do we have to go back to Sunnydale? I could like it here." He chuckled softly.

  "Trust me luv, I would like nothing more than to leave that hell hole as soon as possible. But it will have to wait. But when I *do* leave, you'll be coming with me." She sighed.

  "We should go to the hotel. The sun will be up in an hour or two."

  "Shhh." he admonished gently, "I just want to stay here a little while longer." she smiled and tentatively wrapped her arms around his waist. She rested her head on his shoulder. She was no longer going to argue with herself about how Spike made her feel. All that mattered was that he was here now, and it felt so right.

~~~*~~~

  Angelus grinned slightly when he heard the children come in thirty minutes before sunrise. Drusilla was right, they needed this time away. Spike was becoming more like his old self everyday. And he had the tiny little redhead to thank for that, he would never admit it, but he was truly grateful for her presence in his boy's life.

~Part: 26~

"You're home!" announced an eager voice. Drusilla nearly tackled her sire when she greeted them. Spike snickered as he drew Willow back against him, staring at Dru and Angelus.

  "Yeah, princess, were back", Angelus said, kissing her quickly before dropping exhaustedly into the nearest chair.

  "Did you have fun, pets?" she asked Spike and Willow as she climbed onto her sires lap.

  "Oh yeah, Dru", Spike assured her with a twinkle in his eye,  "the *most* fun." Willow turned an embarrassing shade of pink at his statement. Angelus snorted.

  "Fun for *you* maybe", he grumbled, "but *I* couldn't get a decent days sleep with *those* two next door. They could wake the dead- literally."

  "You're just jealous", added Spike as Willow buried her head in the crook of his neck so she didnt have to look at the two smiling vampires. "Poor Daddy, had to go it alone." At Angelus growl he smirked.

  "Well", the blonde declared, "you two can stay here for all I care, but Red, here, and I are going to bed." As he led her upstairs, Willow stopped him.

  "But Spike, I'm not tired", she stopped at his sly grin.

  "Never said anything about sleeping, luv." Her eyes widened and he laughed softly, tugging her hand to get her to follow him again.

  The minute they entered his bedroom, Spike immediately had the door closed, pushing her up against it. Her breath caught as she looked into his eyes. They were filled with such emotion; longing, and maybe even love. She reached her hand up to his face hesitantly, stroking his cheek softly. He closed his eyes, a small smile playing at his face, relishing her warmth.

  "God, I love you", he whispered, his eyes studying her reaction. She knew that he cared for her, loved her even, but this was the first time he really told her. He was almost afraid she would push him away. Afraid that her earlier fear of him would return. His knees almost gave out on him when she granted him a heart-stopping smile.

  "I-I", she started, not sure if she should say what she was about to, "I think I l-love you, too." His fear now gone, he gave her his trademark smirk, raising a sardonic eyebrow.

  "You think?" She nodded.

  "I-Im just not sure. I dont k-know."

  "Hmmm", he stepped closer to her, pressing himself flush against her, "well, I plan to have a grand time showing you how much I really love you. You'll want for no one else."

  He pounced on her mouth, not giving her a chance to think, his hands grasped her hips tightly, lifting her off the ground. Her legs wrapped around his waist as she attempted to keep her balance. He led them to the bed, releasing his hold on her as he pushed her gently onto the mattress. His shirt quickly found itself in a crumpled heap on the floor as he crawled to her.

  She watched him intently as he made his way to her. He hovered above her, leaning down to place soft kisses on her neck, knowing by the end of the night his mark would be there, trailing down to caress her collarbone and shoulders. She was wearing a sleeveless, knee-length black dress, that had since ridden up to her thighs, that buttoned in the front. He tugged at the buttons, snarling softly as it took him forever to undress her. She giggled at his frustration, he growled and gave up, tearing her dress and throwing it to join his shirt on the floor.

  "Hey! I liked that!" she complained. He rolled his eyes.

  "I'll buy you a new one", he assured her. His attention once again returned to her neck, leisurely making his way down her body as she moaned impatiently.

  "Spike", she whined, her hands finding the button of his jeans.

  "Patience, my love." She growled, unzipping him swiftly and tugging on his jeans harshly. He laughed at her exuberance. She clasped his face in her hands, pulling him to her and kissing him breathlessly.

  "Please", she entreated. He pulled her free of the restricting pieces of lace and slammed into her. She groaned contentedly. He started a slow pace, which was quickly growing maddening for the redhead beneath him. She tightened around him and he let out a strangled moan. It caused him to speed up his thrusts, which she met fervently. He was whispering her name, his mouth lingering near her pulse point. She was writhing in ecstasy, so close to the release she so desperately needed. He too was so near, finally letting himself go when he heard her scream his name. His human face receded as his demon emerged. He bit her neck deeply, but with an underlying tenderness, when he came.

  "Mine!" he made no move to release her. He was content to remain as he was, inside her, licking lazily at his mark on her throat.

  "Yours", she promised sincerely. She had pushed all her doubts away by now. She wasnt going to worry about the future, just focus on the present, like Drusilla had suggested. "I do love you, Spike."

  "Love you too, Red", he whispered as he lay next to her, pulling her into his arms, "more than you'll ever know."

~~~*~~~

  Meanwhile, Giles had gathered the remaining members of their small group in the library once again. Jenny was at the computer, filling in for Willow who was still out of town. Buffy, Xander, and Cordelia were sitting at the table, waiting expectantly for an explanation for why they were there.

  "You all know how we've been trying to ascertain Angelus whereabouts", at their understanding nods he continued, "well, Ms. Calendar has taken to looking for property in the area that has been recently purchased, mostly with cash alone. I believe shes found something suspicious."

  "Yes", Jenny started, picking up where Rupert left off, "you all know of the old mansion on Crawford Street, well, it recently had a buyer, only showing up at nights to speak with realtors, fitting Angelus description. He told them that he needed a lot of room for his family and various other guests he may entertain, like minions."

  "How do you even know all this?" asked Cordelia rather bluntly.

  "I looked it all up on the web. I also got the name of the realtor and spoke with her personally. I am extremely positive that this is where he is hiding out."

  "Well, then what are we waiting for", added Buffy, her voice quiet but hard, "we have to stop Angel before he kills someone. I say we pay him and his family a visit."

~Part: 27~

Angelus was resting, his feet propped up on the nearby coffee-table, Drusilla wrapped around him comfortably. His fingers were gliding through her hair, both sets of eyes mesmerized by the fire in the fireplace.

  "Master!!" shrieked an anxious minion, running through the front door.

  "What?!" Angelus asked, obviously agitated.

  "The slayer", he warned, "she's coming here, now!" The elder vampire growled, gently pushing Dru off him and stalking up to the fledgling.

  "How do you know this?" he ground out.

  "A group of us were feeding, we ran into her. She and her little group were talking about finally taking you out. They mentioned the mansion, here. We tried to stop her, but we were no match. I barely escaped. Shell be here any minute."

  "Leave", he ordered. The panicked minion fled. "Spike!" he bellowed, knowing the blonde would be able to hear him.

~~~*~~~

  "Bloody hell!" he complained, climbing out of bed. "This better be good", he grumbled.

  "Spike, what is it?" asked Willow softly, shifting so she could sit up.

  "Nothing, luv. Dont worry about it. Ill be right back", he assured her as he dressed quickly and left. Spike practically flew down the stairs, angered that his sire interrupted his peaceful moment.

  "What do you want, Peaches?" he snapped. Seeing the distressed look on his sires face, he stopped mid-stride.

  "The slayer, I just got word that she's-" he never got to finish his hurried declaration when the front door burst open, Buffy and the gang entering with weapons in hand. "-here", he finished grimly.

  By this time, Drusilla had joined Angelus at his side, a brief flicker of hurt shone in Buffys eyes at the sight of those two so comfortable together.

  "Buff", Angelus acknowledged with a bow of his head, "to what do I owe the pleasure?"

  "I'm here to stop you from hurting my friends", she responded, trying desperately to ignore that he looked like her lost love.

  "Hurting your friends?" he asked with a humorless chuckle. "When did I hurt any of your brainless friends?"

  "You tried to kill Cordelia!" she shouted incredulously.

  "Well, yeah, that *was* fun. But its not like I went through with it", he added, a slight whine in his voice.

  "What are you waiting for!?" yelled Xander, upset that they were wasting time talking when they should be staking all three vampires. Spike and Angelus rolled their eyes. Angelus pushed Dru behind him to shield her, knowing she could take care of herself, but not wanting her hurt, as he and Spike readied for a fight.

  Cordelia and Xander hung back as Buffy jumped toward Angelus, stake in hand. He easily deflected all her punches and kicks, getting in a few good hits of his own. The slayer, in frustration, kicked out with all her might, hitting him squarely in the back of the knee. He stumbled. Spike saw this and joined the fray.

  Giles became nervous when Spike attacked Buffy. The two vampires were Masters, she may not be able to take on both of them. He suddenly realized that their plan of attack was hastily thought out, and could easily get one of them killed.

  The librarian loaded his crossbow, training it on the blonde a few feet away. Drusilla was so caught up in watching her sire fight the slayer, she never noticed the arrow aimed at her brother.

  "Giles! NO!!" screamed a terrified voice from the stairway. All fighting stopped immediately. Willow stood silently at the top of the staircase. She had remained in bed when Spike had left, but the sound of a battle coming from downstairs had her worried. When she finally got a good view of the scene unfolding in front of her, her heart nearly stopped.

  Spike was protecting his sire, who was doing his best to hold off Buffy without doing serious damage. He wasnt even aware that the watcher was readying his bow to dust him. She knew that her appearance would only make things worse, but she couldnt see any of them get hurt, especially Spike.

  "Wills?" a startled Buffy asked, unable to comprehend why her best friend was in a vampires lair, inwhat, a mans t-shirt and nothing more.

  "H-Hey Buffy-y", she stuttered, her nerves getting the best of her.

  "What are you doing here?" the slayer was beginning to become angry at her friends possible lies, "I thought you were out of town."

  "Baby", Spike said softly, reaching her side quickly and pulling her to him.

  "Whats going on!?!" barked Xander, furious at the casual way that Spike and Willow, *his* Willow, were talking.

  "Willow-mine has been with us", spoke up Dru in defense of her niece. She needed to be with her family. Most of the group was thoroughly confused, all except the watcher.

  "Willow?" he asked quietly, not sure what to say, "did-did they hurt you?"

  "No!!" she insisted, "it's just, complicated."

  "Do you-love-him?" he questioned, needing to know if she was happy here.

  "Y-Yes", she admitted hesitantly. "Please, Giles, you cant hurt him, any of them. They dont want to hurt you, any of you. Please just go", she begged. The watcher took a minute to study her. When he was satisfied that she was being completely truthful, he simply nodded and turned towards the exit, pulling his stunned slayer along with him. Xander remained firmly planted in his spot.

  "You-you love *him*?!" he asked disbelievingly. Before she could respond, he continued, "How could you?! He's a *demon* Willow! Did you just *happen* to forget that little fact!? What happened to you?"

  "Xan", she pleaded, taking a small step forward. She stopped when she saw him back away.

  "No!" he stated, taking a step toward Cordelia, grabbing her hand. "Come on Cordy. Were leaving." He nearly dragged the brunette out of the house.

  Willow didn't even know what to say. She knew it was only a matter of time before her friends found out, but this is not how she wanted this to happen. Xander was furious. Cordy didnt care, but that was expected. Giles knew about Spike, the memories, all of it. Maybe he could talk some sense into them. And Buffy. She was hurt, that much she knew.

  Her shoulders sagged and her tear-filled eyes fell to the floor. Spike held her close, knowing she was in pain. Xander was her best friend and he just stomped over all her feelings.

  After a minute she released her desperate hold on his arms. She took a quick look around, seeing the destruction that Buffy had caused with her raid, the sad look on Drusillas face, and most surprisingly, the worry etched across Angelus usually stony face.

  She wordlessly turned and walked up the stairs, Spike followed her without question. She went to their room and dressed quickly. She headed toward the closet, searching for her bag.

  "Pet?" Spike questioned, suddenly very scared. He saw her grab her bag, hastily throwing her new clothes in it. "What are you doing?"

  "I have to Spike, Im so sorry", she whispered, her voice thick with tears.

  "No!" he commanded, disbelief clouding his voice. "You can't leave!" She stopped what she was doing and walked to him.

  "I love you Spike, you have to know that", she assured him, stroking his face gently. "I can't stay here. Things are-bad. They won't accept it. I-I just don't want to see you hurt."

 "I can take care of myself, leaving isn't the solution."

  "Spike, you told me once that you'd do anything for me. I-I think you, the three of you, should leave. Buffy, she won't leave you be, no matter what Giles tells her. And Xander, he'll only get himself killed trying to hurt you. I can't be the one responsible for that. They are already in so much pain because of me."

  He growled, "I told you that when I leave you're coming with me. I meant it."

  "I wish I could Spike. But things aren't that simple. I have my friends, my parents, school. I can't leave it all behind. This kills me! You have to know that!"

  "I could make you stay", he snapped, his demon at the fore.

  "Please, Spike. Don't do this. Just go. I don't want you hurt. You *need* to leave Sunnydale. It won't be safe here."

  "You want me to just leave you behind!!"

  "No, but things are so confusing right now. For your sake, and mine, make this as easy as possible. I don't want to fight with you. Give it some thought, for me", she begged. He dropped boneless onto the edge of the bed, his legs no longer able to support him. She finished gathering her things and stood in front of him.

  She kissed him softly, but before she could pull away, he grabbed her, pulling her into him and pouring all his emotions into this one kiss. She pushed him away slightly when she had to breathe.

  "Please", he pleaded. She smiled sadly and kissed his forehead.

  "I love you", she whispered as she walked out.

~~~*~~~

  Drusilla and Angelus watched silently as the redhead walked unsteadily to the front door with a suitcase in hand. She never looked back, but they could smell the tears falling down her cheeks. When the door shut, Angelus turned to his childe with a questioning look.

  She looked up at him, a solitary tear sliding down.

  "The princess had to go away", she whimpered. Angelus held her close, not moving, knowing his boy needed sometime alone.

  "Will she be back, Dru?" he asked quietly. She buried her face in his shirt.

  "The stars have gone quiet, my love. I just dont know."

~Part: 28~

Willow woke at 7 a.m. the next morning, readying herself for school. Now that her secret was out, there was no point in avoiding it. What she wasn't looking forward to was the eminent confrontation with her friends. Or should she say former friends. She was pretty sure that they would never understand her falling for a demon, not even Buffy. She may have loved Angel, but he had a soul, Spike didn't and to the slayer that's all that mattered.

  She wasn't sure if Spike was going to take her advice and leave. She didn't want him to go; she wasn't lying when she said she loved him. But she knew that if he stayed, Buffy wouldn't stop until he was dust. She wanted him to take Dru and Angelus and go, anywhere but here. For their safety, for his life, she would give him up.

  She felt unsurprisingly numb as she took a quick, hot shower. She looked through her closet, filled with all her childish clothes. She frowned and found the bag she had packed the night before. Pulling out a pair of suede pants and a crimson scoop-neck shirt, she got dressed.

  Locking her front door behind her, she made her way onto the sidewalk. She walked without hurry, following a memorized path. She was startled out of her revelry when she heard a car horn and saw a small red car pull up beside her.

  "Cordelia?!" she asked, not believing her eyes.

  "Want a ride?" the brunette offered considerately.

  "Uh, sure. Thanks." Willow got in the passenger's seat, throwing her book bag over her shoulder and into the backseat. They made the drive in silence at first.

  "I'm sorry," the cheerleader said quietly.

  "For what? You'd didn't do anything Cordy."

  "Exactly, Xander was wrong. He shouldn't have said what he did. I could have stopped him, said something, but I didn't. Giles told us everything last night, when we got back to school. Buffy still hasn't said much, but Xander, he didn't take it well at all. He's *really* mad." She sighed as they stopped at a red light. Glancing back at the redhead, she added, "I.I just wanted you to know that if you, you know, need someone to talk to, I'm here. It's not like we're going to be friends, or anything, it's just.I sympathize."

  "Thank you, Cordy. That was really sweet." The brunette glared at her.

  "Yeah, well, don't let it get around." They arrived in front of Sunnydale High. "Well, here goes nothing."

~~~*~~~

  Willow avoided them all like the plague. Xander had sent her angry glares during English, Buffy refused to look at her at all in World History. She spent her lunch period alone by the fountain. She never thought to go to the library, knowing, in general, she wasn't welcome. When her last class ended, she gathered up enough courage to enter the dreaded library. She breathed a sigh of relief when she only saw Giles at the counter.

  "Willow." he greeted her with a tentative smile.

  "Hey Giles. How.how have they been taking all this?" He removed his glasses, pinching the bridge of his nose; she knew that wasn't a good sign.

  "They will take awhile to get over it all. They feel like they've been betrayed. Buffy's more upset that you lied to her, Xander, well, he's just mad."

  "That's what I figured. And I understand it Giles, I do. But I just don't know what to do to, to make it all better. I'm not even sure I can."

  "Don't give up, they may come around."

  "That's doubtful," responded a scornful voice. Giles shook his head sadly as Willow gazed upon her friends. After his comment, Xander had taken to ignoring her.

  "Why are you here?" asked Buffy in a neutral tone.

  "What do you mean? Why wouldn't I be here?"

  "I think what she means," replied Xander "is why you aren't with lover-boy? After all, that's how you've been spending your days, warming his bed, right?"

  "Xander!!" Giles admonished.

  "I'm sorry," she whispered, trying in vain to hold back the tears.

  "Don't bother. Why don't you just run back to Spike, that's where you're gonna go anyway."

  "No, I left," she told him quietly.

  "Why?" questioned Buffy.

  "I never wanted to hurt any of you. In the beginning I didn't have a choice; Angel showed at my house, he was helping me deal with the whole 'Spike situation'. I didn't know he was Angelus. He told me I was going to stay with them, so that I finally gave Spike a chance. But, Buffy, Spike was wonderful. He never hurt me, he and Angelus even promised to stay away from all of you for me."

  "I doesn't matter, Wills," the slayer replied calmly.

  "How can you say it doesn't matter!?"

  "He's evil Willow! His promises mean *nothing*. Don't you get that?"

  "Can't you just leave them alone?! I'm not with him any more. I wanted to work this out with you guys. Can't you just be satisfied knowing they won't hurt any of us?"

  "No, Willow. They are *vampires*. They kill. You may be able to forget that but I can't. I'm the slayer, it's my duty."

  "It doesn't matter. They're gone."

  "What?!" exclaimed Xander, anger at not being able to stake Angelus and Spike filling him.

  "I.I asked them to leave town. It might be better for all of us." Xander stared at his best friend.

  "We'll see, Wills, we'll see." The boy turned for the double doors, before leaving he said, "you may be able to earn our trust back.eventually."

~~~*~~~

  Willow left school after their argument in the library. The sun would still be up for another fifteen minutes. She went home; she was suddenly so very tired. She sat on her bed, focusing intently on the wall in front of her. Nothing in particular, just.looking. She felt horrible. She had left Spike, all for the love of her friends who couldn't even stand her at the moment. She felt lost.

  A knock on her balcony doors woke her from her trance. She wasn't sure who it could be, but she was genuinely surprised to see Angelus at her door. She opened it, moving to the side to let him in.

  They said nothing for awhile.

  "We're leaving tonight," he paused, "I'd only do this for you Red.retreat, that is. I know you're probably shocked to see me here, but Spike.couldn't come."

  "I understand." She looked at him imploringly. "Does he hate me?"

  "Never, he's hurting. He wanted you to know that if you need him, or any of us, for any reason, we'll know. We'll be there for you. The mark you bear is more binding than any ring, even though he isn't here, he'll always be with you."

  "Where are you going?" she managed, choking back a sob.

  "Don't know. Anywhere. But we'll never be too far." He glanced at her seeing the blatant pain in her eyes.

  "I hope they're worth this, Will." She walked to him as he stood.

  "I hope so too. Otherwise, I gave up possibly the best thing in my life for nothing." He reached for her, hugging her tightly, knowing this was painful for her.

  "This isn't goodbye, you know," he told her as he pulled away. "Maybe just a 'see you later'." She laughed through her tears.

  "Yeah, I'll see you later Angelus. Could you." she stopped him before he leapt off her balcony, "tell him I love him, always?" He smiled.

  "Sure thing, Red. Sure thing."

~Part: 29~

"How are you doin' Wills?" asked Cordelia as they put on their graduation gowns. Maroon was so not their color.

  The redhead shrugged, "I'm ok, just kinda lonely. My parents aren't coming, Buffy and Xander are still angry with me, you and Giles are the only ones I have here."

  Willow thought over the past few months since Angelus, Spike, and Drusilla left. She never got over the sting of pain that filled her when she thought of them. They left, as Angelus promised, and she never heard from them. She wondered if they were even in the country any more.

  Buffy and Xander never truly forgave her. They spent most their nights Bronzing as they left her to do all the research. She thought, at first, that if she did as they asked, didn't question them, they may come around.

  They went out of their way to remind her that they weren't happy with her. Surprisingly Cordelia had become her rock.

  Xander loathed simply being in her presence. She had no idea how things could have possibly fallen apart so fast. He hated her because she loved a demon. He was her best friend, her confidant, now he couldn't even look her in the eye.

  Buffy was different. She could tell that the slayer had pangs of remorse for her harsh treatment. In the end, Buffy didn't hate her because she lied. She hated her because she had something the slayer never would. The complete love of a soulless demon. Without his soul, Angel despised her. She never truly got over that loss. Spike loved Willow unconditionally, like Angel could never love Buffy. And for that, she hated her.

  She had tried unsuccessfully to get back in their good graces. Her mind kept drifting back to Angelus' words. She frowned as she realized, they weren't worth it. She lost Spike, a real family, and for what, friends who wouldn't speak to her without practically cursing her name.

  Cordelia sighed in sympathy as she looked at her best friend. It was strange for her to think that they had become so close. She saw all the pain that Willow had endured, at the hands of her so-called friends. She just had to make her feel better; it hurt to see her so depressed.

  Even now, on their graduation day, true happiness seemed just out of reach for the redhead. Giles was waiting for them inside the library. Buffy and Xander were already seated outside. Cordelia led the girl to meet the librarian. He was the only other person that had been there for her the entire time.

  Giles knew the whole background of Willow and Spike's pairing. While Angel still had his soul, the watcher had spoken in length with vampire of Spike's past, his love for the girl. He knew this had to be hard for her. She chose her friends over her love and they still refused to accept her.

  He took a moment to study the two girls in front of him as they finished their final preparations for the big day.

  "What?" the redhead asked shyly as she caught him staring.

  "I'm just so proud of the both you. You are like the children I never had." Willow smiled at his sincerity.

  "Aw Giles, don't get all sappy on us now," Cordelia interrupted the moment. The trio gave a small laugh.

  "Have you finished making all your plans for the summer and college?"

  "Yeah," Willow replied, "summer will be spent moving. We're L.A. bound!"

  "Any reason why you chose Los Angeles?"

  "Well its pretty close, didn't want to leave you way behind, Giles. Plus, some.memories." The watcher nodded understandingly.

  "What about you Cordelia?"

  "Oh, well, still moving in with Wills, here. But while she's busy at UCLA, I'll be at auditions, I'm gonna be a famous actress, you know." He chuckled at her enthusiasm.

  "You two should take your seats. It's almost time, one last thing," he called out when they were at the door, "when do you leave?"

  "As soon as it's finished. I'll miss you, Giles," said Willow. He smiled.

  "I'll miss you both, too. Call when you get settled, so I know you're all right." They nodded in agreement and left.

~~~*~~~

  Willow gripped Cordelia's hand tightly in her own as they sat down. It was a bright and sunny day, one might call it beautiful. But to her there was nothing extraordinary about it. She just wanted this entire day to be done with. In a couple hours she and Cordy would be speeding as fast as they could out of this town, away from all the hurt.

  Angelus told her that if she ever needed them, they would be there. Well, there was no moment like this, where she needed Spike so much, and yet the beautiful sun kept him from fulfilling his promise, if he would have at all.

  It wasn't that she doubted him, but he had to be angry with her. If he was in pain, why shouldn't she be? She chastised herself at that thought, knowing Spike would never wish her suffering.

  Cordelia squeezed the redhead's hand, bringing her back to the present. She realized that the long, boring speeches were over, now it was time to hand out the diplomas. She saw Buffy and Xander each get theirs, feeling nothing at their gleeful faces. She and Cordy strode across the stage only minutes later. The small girl searched the crowd as she received hers, smiling gratefully when she found the eyes of Giles. Caps were thrown, cheers were called, and it was over. High school was now but a memory.

~~~*~~~

  "Ready Red?" asked Cordelia as she slammed her trunk closed.

  "Yup, let's blow this hell hole."

  "Damn straight," agreed the former cheerleader as they piled into her car. "L.A. here we come!"

~Part: 30~

"Did you wanna talk, or should we turn on the radio?" asked Cordy.

  "I vote for the radio," Willow decided.

  "Radio it is." agreed Cordelia, turning the dial until she found a suitable station.

  "How much longer is the drive?"

  "I'd say we have another hour and a half. We'll make a stop at the hotel first, drop off our stuff, and then we are going out. I refuse to spend my first night in L.A. in a dingy hotel room."

  "Sounds cool, hopefully we'll find a nice place soon. I'm anxious to get settled."

  "Any place in particular you wanna go when we get there?"

  "Not really, I just need to make a stop after we go out clubbing."

  "No prob. Where did ya want to go?"

  "Santa Monica." Cordelia nodded and they fell into a comfortable silence.

~~~*~~~

  "Home sweet home!" announced the brunette as they walked into their room. It wasn't too horrible, most definitely unimpressive. The walls were a bland white, carpet a dirty brown. There were two full beds in the center of the room, a small table off to the side with a couple of cheap looking chairs, a small TV sitting on the dresser across from the beds.

  "Well," decided the redhead, "it could be worse."

  "Not by much," sneered Cordy.

  "It's only temporary, besides," she responded, flopping indelicately onto the nearest bed, "I'm sooo tired!"

  "Oh no you don't! We're going out! You promised, don't fall asleep on me now!" she ordered.

  "Ok, ok. A-clubbing we will go. Come on." She grabbed the brunette's hand and took her to her car. When they got in, Cordy was practically bouncing in her seat.

  "Where should we go, Wills? Oh, let's go to the Viper Room!"

  "Works in theory, but we aren't twenty-one." She began to pout and Willow couldn't stop her laughter. "We'll drive around a bit, we'll find something."

  They drove for fifteen minutes, looking for any place that struck their fancy. Willow noticed a little hole-in-the-wall club at a nearby corner. The name, The Dungeon, suggested a gothic atmosphere and instantly had her interested.

  "What do you think, Cordy? We go in?" Cordelia thought for a moment but figured what the hell. They parked quickly and walked inside.

  It was extremely dark, torches illuminating the large room. A tribal beat thundered from the speakers throughout the building. They were immediately impressed. Cordelia went onto the dance floor where a large crowd of people were writhing sensually to the music. Willow found herself a table. She wasn't really in the mood to dance the night away. All she wanted to do was relax, reminisce. But Cordelia had insisted and she refused her nothing.

  A few guys would come to her table, asking her to dance, but she brushed them off as nicely as possible.

  "Fancy meeting you here," purred a deep voice from behind her. She was all ready to tell the stranger to go away when she saw who it was she was speaking to.

  "Angelus!" she shrieked, jumping from her seat and flinging herself into his arms.

  "I guess you're happy to see me," he said with a smirk. "What brings you to the big city, little one?"

  "I live here now, in the sense that I don't *actually* have a home here, but same difference."

  "How was graduation, everything you hoped for?" he inquired, she knew he was asking about more than the ceremony.

  "Completely worthless," she answered sadly. "I missed you all."

  "Well, yeah, the women always miss me," he answered smugly.

  "You haven't changed a bit."

  "Not at all, Red." He sighed, "Gotta get going, little one."

  "But!" she wailed, "I just saw you! You can't leave!"

  "Don't worry so much, witch. I'll be around. See you later," he added with a wink.

  "Yeah, see you later Angelus." She watched him saunter away and felt alone again. She missed them so much and she just found the eldest, and already she had lost sight of him. She weaved her way through the throng of bodies, finding Cordelia.

  "Can we go?" she asked the girl. Cordy checked her watch.

  "It's still early!" she argued.

  "Please." she pleaded. Cordy saw the desperation on her face and acquiesced.

~~~*~~~

  They clamored into Cordy's car once again.

  "Where to, Wills?"

  "Can you just drop me off some place? Then you can do whatever you want."

  "Ok, you sure it's safe?"

  "Yeah, it's fine." The brunette shrugged and followed her companion's directions. She stopped the car to allow the redhead to get out. She briefly wondered if she should really leave her alone out here, but she had insisted she'd be fine. So Cordy drove off, out to find one more place to dance before she went back to the hotel.

  Willow strode along the familiar path once again, her eyes staring at her feet. She didn't know why she was putting herself through this. She had Cordy bring her to that secluded beach off the Santa Monica Pier were she and Spike had spent their night in Los Angeles. She came to remember the sheer happiness she felt then. Hoping she could feel even half that now.

  She sat down on the soft sand, burying her bare feet in it, the feel of it warming her skin. She looked up into the starry sky before lowering her gaze to the ocean. A lone tear found its way down her face. She regretted telling him to leave. She knew it was for their safety, but it still killed her inside. She regretted choosing her former friends over the man she had grown to love.

  Spike had worked so hard to make her understand him, to show her the depth of his feelings. She had to admit she was a little scared. Everything happened so fast, feelings were so intense. But it was just beginning to feel like everything was right. She thought her friends could accept her, knowing he would never hurt her, knowing she was happy. But they refused to see the love they had, that could have blossomed into so much more. Something eternal. Instead, they wanted his dust at their feet. Even after she chose them, she was never good enough, tainted.

  Things between her and Spike had never been easy, but when it was good, it was perfect. She closed her eyes, letting various memories from throughout time flood her consciousness. She saw herself and Spike, through the generations, so in love. Now she didn't even know where he was. Angelus was in the city, but his childer may no longer be with him. It had only been a few months, but to her it felt like forever.

  "It's beautiful tonight." she mumbled, echoing her sentiments from that night.

  "That it is." answered a soft, accented voice. She turned, unwilling to believe her eyes when she saw Spike standing there, a look of sadness, longing, and love on his face.

  "Spike."she whispered, afraid he would just disappear. He stretched out a hand to her, which she accepted quickly. He pulled her so she was standing, barely any room between them.

  "It's me, luv." She granted him a watery smile before she jumped into his embrace, holding on for dear life.

  "I've missed you so much, Spike. I love you, I'm so sorry." she rambled, just ecstatic to have him near.

  "Love you too, Willow." He pulled her away slightly so he could look in her eyes. "Don't leave me again." he pleaded. She threaded her fingers through his shocking hair and kissed him with all the passion in her being.

  "Never," she assured him. She was finally back where she belonged.

THE END

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