~Part One~

Xander looked at the materials laid out in front of him, a small crease
appearing on his forehead as he concentrated, trying to remember the name for
each one. “Wills…are you sure we should be doing this?”

Willow looked up from her spell book, a glint of happiness in her eyes. “It
will be fine, Xan. Either it works or it doesn’t work – no harm done either
way.” She flashed him a bright smile and went back to studying the words to the
spell. It was something she had come across almost by mistake, flipping through
one of Tara’s family spell books one night. A spell to permanently anchor a
soul into a member of the living dead. It wasn’t even that hard to do, just
required a little help – thus Xander.

“Are you sure we shouldn’t tell the others?” The dark haired youth asked,
concern still evident in his face. He trusted Willow with his life – in
anything not involving magic, thus his worry on this night. “Wouldn’t it be
better to let Giles look over the spell, first?”

The red head sighed, a small amount of irritation entering her normally serene
face. “Xander, if you are that worried about it then don’t help. I can always
call Tara.”

The boy’s mouth closed with a snap. He frowned slightly, choosing his next
words carefully. “I want to help, Wills, I’m just sort of nervous about the
whole magic stuff.”

“You don’t trust me…?” Willow pouted, her lower lip trembling slightly. She
sighed, pushing away the book. “It can wait until Tara can help me, Xan.” She
held out her hand to him, trying to pull him to his feet. “Come on, get up. We
can go see a movie or something.”

Xander grinned, trying to push his fears to the back of his mind. This
obviously meant a lot to her, him being here for this spell, and he could
understand why she didn’t want to tell Buffy or the others – they would just
try to talk her out of it. “No, Wills, sit down and get your book. We’re gonna
make it so Deadboy can get a happy.”
 

** ** **

Willow held the incense in her hand, chanting the words set forth on the page.
Her voice grew louder as the spell progressed, a light wind ruffling her hair.

Xander watched on in mute awe as the spell began to show some signs of working.
He threw some more of the herbs Willow had set aside into the small fire
glowing in the charred black pot between them. He could feel a breeze blowing
around them, though he knew for a fact no windows in the house were open. A
lump formed in the back of his throat and for one brief moment he felt fear.
He heard Willow’s chanting stop, the spell complete and he waited for any sign
that they had been successful.

Out of nowhere the wind picked up, blowing –through- first Xander then Willow
before disappearing entirely. The red head dropped the book, clutching her
chest and saw her childhood friend do the same. She gasped, taking in a
lungful of air. “Are you ok, Xan?”

“Did the spell work?” Xander finally gasped, putting his arm around the red
head’s shoulders. He pulled her tight to his body, trying to both stop the
chills she was feeling but allay some of his own as well.

“I don’t think so…” Willow whispered, her throat raw. She couldn’t explain what
had happened as she completed the spell, but she was sure it didn’t mean a
permanent soul for her friend. She sighed, pulling away from Xander. “Oh well.
No harm, no foul.” She shrugged, gathering the supplies and placing them back
in her bag. “Lets not mention this to anyone, please? They already tease me
enough for being a witchy-failure.”

Xander nodded, closing his eyes briefly. Maybe it was the heavy incense in the
air, maybe it was just the excitement – he didn’t know which, but he was
suddenly very tired. He yawned, helping her get her things together. If he got
home soon he could still get a little sleep before Anya came over.

Definitely no reason to mention this to anyone else.
 

~Part Two~

Willow yawned, pushing the thick tome she had been staring at away from her. It
was only five in the afternoon yet she already felt as if it was much later.
{Just another wacky side-effect of a botched spell,} she thought sadly. The
door shut behind her and she looked up, smiling at the newest entrant to the
room. “Hey, Xan.”

The boy smiled tiredly at his friend, collapsing onto the couch. “Where’s Buffy
and G-Man?”

“Out looking for some sort of crypt,” the red head shrugged. It was odd, but
she honestly didn’t care what they were out doing – or even that they needed
help. All that she really wanted to do was cuddle Xander and sleep.

{Cuddle Xander?!?} Willow’s higher thoughts shrieked. {Where did that come
from?} She looked up at him through her lashed, hoping he wouldn’t notice the
sudden discomfort she was feeling. Images of cuddling with the dark-haired
friend of her childhood ran through her mind, bringing a sense of completeness
to her heart. Her brain couldn’t cope with the where or why of the thoughts.
Reasons for why she would be thinking of him in that way again after so long
were the last thing on the red head’s mind.
The only thing she could really concentrate on, in fact, was Xander.

Who was watching her.

She smiled at him shyly. “Why the stares, Xan?”

Xander shook his head slowly, not quite sure himself why he suddenly couldn’t
take his eyes off of the woman in front of him. He licked his lips, trying to
phrase what he was feeling in a way that wouldn’t sound weird or obsessive.
“Would it sound strange to say that I don’t know? That I feel like I am seeing
you for the first time?”

The witch shook her head. “No…doesn’t sound weird at all.” It was as if a part
of her was being called by him, to him. She couldn’t deny it, didn’t really
want to try to. She stood. “Want to go for a walk? Get away from this stuffy
old house?”

He nodded, rising to his feet and offering her his hand. “Sounds good. I’m sure
Slutty can do without us for once.” His hand flew to his mouth, eyes wide. “Did
I just call her that?”

Willow laughed, squeezing the hand in hers. “I think so. Sounded good though,
sort of right in a way.” {After all she is a major slut sometimes.} the red
head smirked at her own dark thoughts. “C’mon, lets go take a walk in the
park.”

** ** **

Willow leaned back in her swing, kicking her legs lazily as Xander pushed her
into the air. She smiled, closing her eyes and enjoying the wind brushing past
her face. This was one of the things she missed most about her childhood –
trips to the park with Xander – playing until dusk then going home for fresh
cookies from her mom.

{Mom was actually around back then,} the red head snorted quietly, almost in
disbelief of her own memories. Things had been so much simpler back then. Back
before demons and vampires, back before Buffys and Angels…back when it was just
her and Xander and Jesse. The three Musketeers.

Xander could see the look of happiness on his friend’s face each time she
leaned back and he smiled in an unnoticed response. “Why so happy, Wills?”

“Just remembering the past, before our lives got complicated. Remember when the
only thing we were afraid of was your parent’s basement?”

Xander chuckled, stopping the swing when it came back within reach. “That and
my parents themselves…”

Willow’s face darkened. She hated to be reminded of the abuse that Xander had
suffered as a child – continued to suffer now. He deserved so much better than
that. {I wish they would just die!} she screamed silently to her gods. A
shiver passed through her as she realized what exactly she had just wished for.
Hopefully whatever malevolent spirits that always seemed to be waiting for one
to screw up in Sunnydale weren’t listening to that.

She turned, the chains of the swing twisting, so that she could look into
Xander’s face. Reaching out a hand, she lightly caressed his cheek, the pull
she was feeling towards him stronger with the short distance between them.
“Xan…”

“Shh…” Xander whispered, his hand on her face, echoing the movements she was
making on his. He smiled at her, something deep within him recognizing her as
someone he could do anything with, be his true self with. She was his other
half in every way. But there was Anya…and Tara. He growled softly under his
breath, leaning down to kiss her gently on the lips.

Willow felt his soft lips touch hers and she thrilled for one moment, allowing
herself to enjoy the contact. But it wasn’t right, they both had girlfriends
and this was cheating. “Xander…” She murmured, pushing lightly at his chest.
“We can’t do this…Anya and Tara would get hurt.”

“Fuck them,” Xander whispered harshly. “I don’t care about that tramp of an
ex-demon as much as I care for you…” His mouth shut with an audible snap. Just
where had all these feelings of love and fuzziness for Willow come from all of
a sudden? And why was he being so mean about Anya? He stepped back slightly,
running a hand through his dark hair. “Sorry…you’re right. I’m just tired and
not thinking clearly.”

The red head nodded slowly, standing and giving him a hug. “Its ok, Xan, lets
just forget about this. No need to tell Anya or Tara, right?” She gave him a
hopeful look.

“Right,” he smiled. The need to be close to her and kiss her again was coming
back and he stepped back another few feet. “No need to tell them. Ready to go
home?”
 

~Part Three~

Buffy walked into the Bronze, her eyes and ears automatically searching for
people she knew. She frowned slightly, spotting Xander and Willow sitting in
the back, laughing together. Walking towards them she had a moment to rein in
her emotions. Maybe they had a good excuse for ditching research last night.
Maybe something important had come up. “Hey guys.”

Xander looked away from Willow, his face darkening slightly. He took a deep
breath, trying to calm the unbidden feelings of disgust the blonde was bringing
forth in him tonight. “Hey, Buff.” He smiled, the expression obviously
strained.

Willow didn’t even bother to look up, her legs kicking absently under the
table. She closed her eyes, letting the music from the band wash over her. The
past few days had been so tiring, but she finally felt as though she was
getting back on track. Being around Xander helped, he seemed to understand
exactly what she was going through. On impulse, she reached under the table,
allowing her fingers to splay out lightly against the hard muscle of his thigh.
She felt him tense slightly before relaxing and knew he wasn’t going to fight
it tonight.

“So….” Buffy looked back and forth between the two of them. “What happened last
night? We got back and you guys weren’t there researching.”

The red head opened her eyes, the green orbs sparkling with amusement. “We got
bored. Went to the park.” She shrugged nonchalantly. “Just didn’t feel like
researching.”

The blonde’s forehead wrinkled in confusion. “You got bored?” She shut her
mouth before opening it again. “But that’s your job – research. Its what the
two of you do.” She turned slightly, sensing a vampire approaching. When she
noticed it was only Spike, the Slayer turned back to the table, waiting on a
response from the two people across from her.

“Good morning, mates.” Spike drawled, pulling up a stool at the table. He could
feel the tenseness in the air, could see the anger welling up in the two
humans he had always considered the tame one of the group.

Willow shivered suddenly, as if a chill wind had blown through her and she felt
Xander do the same. She turned to Spike, her concentration momentarily off of
the Slayer. “Morning?” She chuckled. “Well I guess it is for you, Blondie.”

“So what’s going on, ducks?”

The red head shrugged, turning back to glare at Buffy. “Slutty here was just
telling us our ‘jobs’.”

Buffy’s mouth dropped open, her eyes growing wide with disbelief. “ ‘Slutty’?”
Her voice was cold when she could finally speak again. “Willow…what in the hell
has gotten into you?”

“Yeah, Wills,” Xander reprimanded, winking at the witch. “*Slutty*? I would’ve
gone with *Bitchy* in this case.” He grinned at the outraged expression on the
Slayer’s face, placing a gentle kiss on Willow’s forehead.

“You’re both possessed, right?” Buffy mumbled, unbelieving that two of her best
friends were turning on her. She took a step back from the table, waiting for
any sort of response from them.

Spike looked at the two humans, his own mouth wide open. This was the last
thing he had ever expected to see happen between these three. Never in a
million years had he ever thought he would see the moron and the witch turn on
the Slayer. But here they were, doing just that, and with a flare and finesse
he was enjoying. Maybe they were worth getting to know after all.

“Possessed?” Willow smirked. “Yeah possessed by the good sense to see you for
what you really are.”

“A vampire fucking, good for nothing, simpering little twit?” Xander chuckled,
taking a sip of his soda as the Slayer continued to stare at them in disbelief.
“Oh get over it, Buffy. You boss us around, treat us like trash, and expect us
not to get pissed? You really are oblivious.”

“That was harsh, Chubs,” Spike snickered. The two humans turned to look at him,
equal expressions of shock on their faces. The vampire was the last creature
they had expected to stick up for the Slayer. He smirked, winking at them. “She
doesn’t shag vampires anymore…just washed up bloody commandos.”

Xander laughed, the sound pure and husky. “You know, you’re right, Junior.” He
grinned. “Sorry about that Buffs, I meant to say that you are a washed-up
commando fucking, good for nothing, simpering twit.” He turned back to the
laughing blonde haired vampire. “Is that better?”

“Much.” The vampire grinned. He watched as the Slayer glared at the entire
table one final time before turning on her heel and leaving.

Spike chuckled as the Slayer stormed away from the table. He looked over at the
two humans who were still sitting there - the boy whispering in her ear as she
laughed about something. "Chubs...I thought you were dating that demon chit."

Xander looked up from Willow, his eyes narrowing. "I guess. Why?"

"Just wondering why you're all touchy-feely with Red there," the vampire
shrugged. Something was different about these two, something he couldn't quite
put his finger on.

"Oh, lord," Willow groaned, rolling her eyes. "Speak of the bitch and she shall
appear."
She pointed across the room where an apparently angry former vengeance demon
was bearing down on them.

"Lovely," Xander smirked. He didn't even stand as the girl approached, just
watched her through hooded eyes.

"Xander," Anya snapped, glaring at him. She didn't even bother to look at the
other occupants of the table, ignoring them as usual. "Where have you been?"

"Home? Here? Why?"

"Why?" The auburn haired girl asked. Her eyes bored holes into his, burning
with anger. "You haven't called me or come to see me in two days and you are
asking me why?"

The young man rolled his eyes, scooting off the edge of his stool and grabbing
Willow's hand. With his eyes never leaving Anya's, he leaned down to kiss the
red head gently on the forehead. "C'mon, Wills, lets get out of here. I'm
suddenly bored."

The witch grinned, caressing the hard chest of the boy she had known her whole
life. She licked the edge of his chin before smirking at Anya. "Sounds good to
me, Xan. This place just isn't fun anymore."

Spike watched the two leave, the grin on his face growing. Things in Sunnyhell
were about to get interesting - he had a feeling. He turned to Anya, chuckling
softly.

"So, ducks, guess that means its over between you two."
 

~Part Four~

Willow shivered slightly, drawing her new leather jacket around her. It had
been a present from Xander. Part of her wondered where he had suddenly gotten
the money to buy the two hundred dollar piece of clothing, while the other part
of her couldn't care less. It was all hers now - a present from her lover.

The thought of the dark haired youth who had been the object of her desire for
most of her life made her smile as she continued on down the street. She passed
by the quiet dorms, knowing that most of the students would be at the frat
party. It was where she should have been and she would be meeting Xander there
as soon as she was done with what she had to do.

Break it off with Tara.

As she climbed the stairs she wondered when her feelings for the blonde had
changed. She couldn't honestly pinpoint the exact moment when being with the
sweet girl had started to turn her stomach but it had most certainly happened.
Her girlfriend had slowly become not someone she wanted to be with for the rest
of her life, but someone she couldn't wait to get rid of.

Taking a deep breath, Willow knocked firmly on the door to Tara's dorm room.
She knew the blonde was going to take this badly. Probably cry and ask a lot of
stupid questions...then cry some more.

And Willow was looking forward to it.

"Willow!" Tara said happily when the door opened. She reached out to hug the
red head, surprised when the girl pulled away quickly. "I didn't think you were
coming by tonight...you've been so busy with school lately..."

"Yeah..." The red head smirked, walking into the room and waiting for Tara to
shut the door. "That’s sorta what I wanted to talk to you about."

Tara raised an eyebrow, regarding her girlfriend with a confused look. "T..Talk
to me about?" The words sent a chill up her spine. What was going on with the
woman she had fallen in love with.

"Yeah...you see, I really haven’t been that busy with school," Willow drawled,
sitting on a chair across from Tara's bed. She smirked as the now trembling
girl sat across from her.

"I...see," Tara frowned, biting her lip. "You just needed some time to
yourself? I understand...take all the time you need." She gave the red head
what she hoped was an understanding smile, her heart breaking.

"So glad you understand!" Willow cried sarcastically. "Truth is. I don’t need
some time to myself...just time away from you." She smirked as the blonde's
face fell, tears starting to glisten on her face. "I honestly don't like being
alone and, well, Xander said he'd be there for me....and I believe him, after
all - he's been there for me every night this week."

Tara gasped, hot tears splashing down her face. How could Willow do this? Break
her heart then dance on it like she never meant anything to her. "I...I don't
understand..."

Willow nodded, giving her a condescending smile. "I know you don't. That’s okay
though, you don't need to." A true smile lit up her face as she turned to go
towards the door. "See ya around." Tara's sobs followed her out into the hall
and she grinned, closing her eyes and letting the sweet music wash over her
senses.

When those sparkling green eyes opened again she was still smiling, her heart
light. Anya and Tara were out of the picture. Now was the time for her and
Xander to shine.

Sunnyhell was in for a surprise, to be sure.
 

~Part Five~

Buffy crept into the small dorm room she shared with Willow, unsurprised to see
the bed made. The red head hadn't come home since the night at the Bronze,
nearly four days before. Turning on the light, the blonde quickly strode to the
young witch's side of the room, searching for anything that might would explain
the drastic change that had overcome both her and Xander.

Her eyes flitted over the stack of spell books perched precariously on the edge
of the desk and she lifted the topmost one, flipping through it rapidly.
Nothing jumped out at her as something Willow might have tried and she set it
aside, grabbing the next.

Halfway through the stack of books, Buffy found what she was looking for. A
small leather-bound volume with a velvet  ribbon marking a page. She turned to
it, holding her breath. It was in another language, one the Slayer was sure she
had seen before but couldn't quite place. She fingered the index card laying
between the pages, her eyes growing wide with disbelief. Snapping the book
shut, the blonde raced out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

Giles had to see this as soon as possible.

** ** **

"Oh, my."

Buffy stared at her Watcher, fear gripping her heart. He had been positively
quiet since she had showed him the spell, simply whispering 'oh my' over and
over again. "Giles...come on...dish...what’s going on?"

The former librarian paled, turning to his charge. "We need to speak with them
right away."

The Slayer nodded. She didn't understand what exactly was so bad about the
spell but knew that Giles would explain all in good time. Reaching over to the
phone, she dialed Xander's number, holding her breath until she heard the phone
pick up. "Xander?"

"No." Willow snapped.

"Willow. Just as good. This is Buffy."

"Gee. Couldn't have guessed." A few neighborhoods over the red head was rolling
her eyes, making gagging motions as the Slayer stuttered over her sentences.

"Willow. I know you don't want to talk to me..."

"So why are you calling?"

"Well...." Buffy sighed, trying to remind herself that there must be a good
reason why the red head was acting like this. "I was looking through one of
your spell books and I found this spell you had marked...it looked
interesting...something about a soul restoration...so I took it to Giles and he
read it and he really really needs to see the two of you right now."

The blonde waited, listening to the line for any sign of life. "Hello...?"

"We'll be over in ten minutes."

Buffy hung up the phone, the harsh dial tone buzzing in her ear.  Hopefully
this would explain the whole thing - hopefully she would have her friends back.
She turned to Giles, her eyes alight with curiosity.

"They're coming - now what's going on?"

** ** **

"So she went through your stuff?" Xander asked, his voice deadly quiet. Dark
eyes sparkled with anger.

"Looks that way..." Willow sighed. She kicked at a rock as she passed it,
sending the small piece of granite skittering into the grass. "Found the book
with the damn spell I botched."

"Baby..." Xander purred, stopping suddenly and catching her arm so that she
turned to face him.  "Who cares if -we- messed up the spell? What they think of
us doesn’t matter. They're -nothing-." He leaned down, kissing her tenderly.

"I know..." The red head chuckled. "But what if that’s the reason we have been
like this? You have to admit we've changed since we did the spell....we've been
acting different...and us being together...you know that’s new."

The young man's eyes darkened, anger taking over. "So you regret it? Feeling so
free? Being happy for once in our lives?"

Willow laughed suddenly, caressing his cheek with her palm. "No baby. I don't
regret one moment of it. I feel more alive and free than I ever did. Nothing
bothers me anymore...and we're together. The only thing I would ever regret
would be that it took a spell to get us this far..."

Xander smiled. "Good. Cuz that’s exactly how I feel." His hands moved to her
hips, pulling her body flush against his. He had to admit that the leather
jacket he had gotten her looked good on her. Especially with the short skirt
and silk shirt she was wearing.

He licked gently at her lips, teasing them open with his tongue as his hands
moved down onto her suede-covered butt. As their tongues battled for dominance
he felt his already tight black jeans tighten even further - his arousal
pushing at them almost painfully. "Do we have to go over there?" He murmured
into her lips, his eyes clearly conveying what he would rather do with the
time.

She smiled, her small hand reaching between them to rub absently at his
cloth-covered rod. "We'd better...or else she'll turn up on our doorstep ready
to do an exorcism or something. Lets just go. Deny everything and act all
goody-goody again. Maybe then she'll leave us alone for a while."

Xander nodded. "Fine...but afterwards...."

"After that....I'm yours, all night."

** ** **

 “And you are positive you didn’t do this spell?” Giles asked, for the tenth
time. He watched the two youths in front of him.

“Positive, Giles.” Willow smiled. “I haven’t tried any spells in a few weeks,
actually. Nothing major.” She licked her lips, grimacing inside for having to
be nice to the Slayer and her Watcher. “Why?”

Giles sighed. “It would have explained your recent…behaviour is all. The spell
steals the soul of whomever is in the room when it is cast. Piece by piece.”

Xander tilted his head to the side, the goofy smile they had come to know and
trust on his face even as his stomach lurched with distaste. “Ew. That
sounds…painful.” He smirked, leaning over to kiss Willow’s forehead. “Honestly
though, we haven’t cast any spells.”

Nodding almost imperceptibly, Buffy looked at her two former friends seated so
cozily on the couch together. “So…if you didn’t cast that spell…what’s with the
attitudes lately?”

For a brief moment Willow’s face darkened, her hatred and annoyance with the
people in the room overtaking her. Then it was gone, and she was smiling at
them as if she hadn’t just had thoughts of killing them. “We’ve just…been going
through a lot of changes. Breaking up with our lovers, finally finding each
other.” She sighed, giving Buffy her best innocent expression. “We just need
some time to find ourselves, find out who we are. We’ve lived in your shadow
for the past five years, Buffy…Just understand that we need some time to
ourselves now.”

Buffy nodded. It made perfect sense at last. They had been nothing but her
side-kicks ever since they met her, fighting to save the world more than any
normal teen ever should have had to. They needed to find out who they were,
then they would be back to normal. “I understand.” She smiled at the two of
them. “You know we are here for you if you need us.”

Willow nodded, standing up and offering Xander her hand. She turned, burying
her face in his chest so the other two in the room wouldn’t see her smirk. This
had been too easy. Buffy had accepted her explanation without any further
questions. “Well, we’d better be going. Plans and stuff.”

Giles watched the two go, not totally convinced of their innocence in the whole
matter of the spell. It would require some further research, he was sure.

He just hoped he had that long.
 

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