*~*~*~

I'd trade a river of tears for just a little emotion

-Matchbox20-
"Unkind"

*~*~*~

*~ "Can I speak to you, Willow," Angel asked the tiny redhead softly, his dark eyes downcast as he ignored his childe's derisive snort.

*~ "Why, vampire," Willow demanded coldly, the mask of ice firmly in place. They were still at the Watcher's apartment, waiting for the two slayers and Xander and Anya to show up. Angel looked over at Spike, who was reguarding him with icy blue eyes. He sighed and toyed with the buttons on his shirt, an unconscious nervous gesture not many knew he had.

*~ "I just need to talk to you, alone, before Buffy gets here," he said, his voice remaining soft.

*~ "Fine," Willow snapped, her impatience coming to the front easily. Spike opened his mouth to argue, but she stopped him with a soft touch of her lips on his. Angel's heart twisted as he watched her quickly quiet his obnoxious childe with a few tender words. God, how he wished things were different, that he'd told Buffy to go away before he'd lost Willow. "I'll be fine, lover. After I talk to him, we can go off on our own for a while..."

*~ Spike's grin curved and his eyes flicked to the pained expression on Angel's face. "In that case," he drawled wickedly, his hand squeezing her waist gently
through the flowing red fabric. "Hurry up, luv."

*~ Willow put her hand on Angel's arm so he could lead her outside so they could talk uninterrupted.

*~ They walked a few feet away from the Watcher's apartment before Willow got irritated at his silence. "Are you going to talk, or are we going to walk all
goddamned night?"

*~ "No... I mean, yes," Angel stammered, then sighed. "I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry for what I did."

*~ "Is that it?" she demanded when he didn't continue immediately. "Boy, you should have just saved it, Angelus. I don't want to hear your apologies. I don't
want to hear your excuses either. I'm not some gullible little kid that you can apologize to and make everything better. Things are never going to be better
because there's nothing in heaven *or* hell that could make me forgive you."

*~ He sighed again, the sound grating on her nerves. Angrily, she pulled out of his grasp and stood still, blind green eyes nearly glowing in the dark night.
"Leave me and go get Spike. Tell him I'm waiting."

*~ "But-," Angel started to argue, thinking about this particular spot, right in front of the still crowded Bronze, would not be a good place for Willow to wait.

*~ "Shut up and go get Spike," Willow ordered impatiently, almost wishing, in the darkest part of her soul that didn't hate every part of him, that he would stand up to her and tell her not to be such a bitch, that he was going to walk her back whether she liked it or not. But, as the weakling that he'd become, he turned and walked back toward the Watcher's house.

*~ Willow sighed and rolled her aching head around on her shoulders. She knew exactly where she was, she could feel the thumping of the drums through the pavement she was standing on and could hear the voices of the loud teenagers inside. With a smile, she walked into the crowded building, letting instinct lead her to a back table cleared with a tought from her. She settled in, oblivious to the stares she was recieving, and waited for her mate to hurry up and come to get her.
 

Part 17

*~*~*~*~

But it was so long ago, and it was far away
Oh, God it seems so very far
And if life is just a highway,
Then the soul is just a car
And objects in the rear view mirror may appear
Closer than they are

"Objects In The Rear View Mirror May Appear Closer
Than They Are"

-Meat Loaf-

*~*~*~*~

*~ The redhead didn't have long to wait before Spike was at her side, his cold hand sliding into hers. She smiled and brought their joined hands to her lips,
kissing his knuckles softly.

*~ "I'm glad you're here," she said softly.

*~ "I can't believe the Poof left you here by yourself, pet," Spike snorted, but he was smiling at the almost cowed way his sire had entered the Watcher's apartment and told him Willow was waiting for him by the Bronze.

*~ "I know," she replied with a smile. "I almost wish he wasn't so soul-whipped. She snorted, "And he's supposed to be a warrior."

*~ "Well, pet-," Spike started to say something, when they were interrupted by a new, familiar voice. Willow's hand reflectedly tightened in Spike's as her
body stiffened.

*~ "Hey, Rosenburg, I thought you left town, ran away or something." Willow didn't need her eyesight to know who it was.

*~ "Listen you blighter," Spike growled, but Willow cut him off.

*~ "Spike," her tone was quiet, but firm. Her blind eyes stared at nothing as she turned her attention back to the boy in front of her. "Yes, I left. But I'm back now. and what are you still doing here, Percy? I would have thought that Daddy's money would've gotten you a free ride to a college of your choice."

*~ "I uh...," unused to the calm, unruffled redhead, Percy stumbled over his words. "I'm manager here at the Bronze."

*~ Willow smiled slowly, easily picking up on the lie. He was nothing more than a glorified waiter, if that. He'd thought she'd be an easy mark, just like she had
been all through elementary and high school. "Nice to know you're doing so well," she said, her voice tinged with amusement. She turned to Spike, already bored with the conversation, the music, and most of all, with Percy. "Are you ready, Spike? I'm getting a headache."

*~ "Any time you are, luv," Spike grinned, his blue eyes twinkling over at the former jock. "We've still gotta work on Operation Peaches."

*~ Willow smiled and allowed him to help her to her feet. "Nice to see you again, Percy. I hope your job here as *manager* is as good as you say it is."

*~ Spike snorted at the dumbfounded look on the boy's face. His smile froze in place as his eyes caught sight of something just beyond the boy's face. Dark
hair, tall, lythe body, beautiful, exotic features, dark eyes that spoke only too truly of her madness.

*~ "Spike?" Willow demanded worriedly, sensing the change in him immediately. "What's wrong? What do you see?"

*~ Percy looked back and forth between the couple, wisely deciding that it would be good for him to go... somewhere else.
 

Part 18

*~ Willow was in a state of angered shock. After a mumbled excuse, Spike had ushered her out of the teenaged club and had dropped her off at his
apartment, staying only long enough to make sure she had everything she needed. Then he'd left again.

*~ With a snarl of rage, she threw the coffee table across the room, hearing the satisfying sound of breaking glass. As quickly as the anger had come, it
was gone. With a thought, she restored the damage and collapsed on the floor, hot tears flowing down her face for the first time in a long time.

*~ She knew who it was that had affected him so greatly. And she knew that he was going back there to confront her. Drucilla. His Dark Goddess... His old
lover. Her face twisted as her mind twirled around all the possible senarios that could come from this.

*~ One: he could leave her for the other vampire. Two: he could tell the dark haired woman where to go and how to get there. Or three: he could do like Angel and fool around behind her back.

*~ Her face smoothed out. She didn't need him. She didn't want him if he didn't want her. She rose and went into the bathroom, her mind doing the tasks she
usually would have done by herself, closing and locking the bathroom door, turning the knobs to adjust the bathwater, gathering towels, and dribbling jasmine scented bathoil into the rapidly filling tub.

*~ She undressed and eased into the almost too hot water. All she had to do is wait. She pushed the fear down into the dark, dark place where she hid all her emotions. She would wait. Wait and see what her blonde vampire would do.
 

Part 19

*~*~*~*~

A tortured soul
A wound unhealing
No regrets or promises
The past is gone

-Savage Garden-
"You Can Still Be Free"

*~*~*~*~
*~ He crawled in bed with her, wrapping his arms around her waist and burried his face in her stomach. His muscular shoulders shook with sobs. She'd woken up as soon as he'd re-entered the apartment, his despair riding the air like a strange perfume. Now, her slender, pale hands stroked the shaking flesh of his back, at once comforting and inquiring.

*~ "I- I did it, luv," he whispered finally, lifting his face to look into hers. "Drucilla's gone. Forever."

*~ "Was that necessary, lover," Willow asked softly, her tone non-condemning and understanding. She knew the answer, but he needed to say it.

*~ "Y-yes," he said, crawling the rest of the way up her body to cradle her in his arms. "You are my life now. She threatened you. She threatened me. She wasn't what I wanted. I went there, ready to see what she had to say. I'll be honest, Red. I went to her thinking that maybe we could have another chance. But looking at her, seeing her like that made me realize that I have what I want, right here."

*~ "But that doesn't make it any easier to deal with her death," Willow whispered, her tone understanding. Her hand still stroked his back, even as he turned and kissed her softly. He soon lost himself in her caress, in her body as they moved together as one, more gentle than they had ever come together.

*~ And afterward, holding her sleeping body in his arms, he knew he'd made the right choice.
 

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