Email: madsdog13@hotmail.com
Disclaimer: Oakie, Lucy, Tina and the as yet un-named babe are mine; the other character's and their connections to Sunnydale belong to Joss and his teams
Summary: Angel Investigations opens its long closed doors to aid a boy
Couples: Willow/Oz mentioned, ultimately Willow/Spike
Spoilers: Angel season 1, Buffy season 4
Rating: Mostly pg-13 although could get nasty later- adult themes
Notes: I'm English and refuse to have children calling their mother "mom" or "mommy" for the entirety of my fic, so apologies to you yanks (not meant nastily, honest) but it's "mum", "mother", or "mummy"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
~Part: 1~
"Please sir? Are you Angel?" Spike looked up from the book he was reading to meet the eyes of a small boy
"No, I'm not."
"Oh. Sorry." The tiny gleam of light that had been in the boy's eyes fled as he turned towards the exit
"But I can take you to him." The boy turned back to face Spike and his eyes held some of their brightness once again. With a start, the vampire realised the tiny spark was hope
"What's you name, son?" The boy flinched and the vampire stored his reaction, wondering from what it originated
"Oskar."
"I'm Spike." He offered his hand as the boy's eyes widened
"You're Spike?"
"That's what I said."
"How do you know where Angel is? I thought you hated him." Spike regarded the boy suspiciously, but decided not to pursue the matter
"Well he's not my favourite person, but I bare him." He flashed the boy a smile that was cautiously returned. The grin made Spike stop, re-examine the boy, then shake his head
"This way." Opening the door of his sire's room, he entered and then motioned for Oskar to follow
"Spike. Can't you see I'm in the middle of something?"
"I've got someone to see you." Shifting so as Oskar was no longer shadowed by him, Spike introduced the two
"Oskar, Angel. Peaches this is Oskar. I found him looking for you downstairs."
"You didn't find me. I found you." Oskar looked defiantly at the blonde, bringing forth a chuckle from Angel
"How can I help you Oskar?" The defiance vanished from the boy's face to be replaced by a childlike haunted look
"My mummy needs you." The two vampires regarded the boy, unsure how to react to this
"Please sir. This is you, isn't it?" Oskar held out a piece of paper to Angel, which he took and examined. It was a business card, although you could hardly tell. It was from about fifteen years previous when Cordelia Chase had had a batch printed as "Angel Investigations" was just starting. It had the old address and telephone number on which had been crossed out and the new details written on in faded ink
"Where did you get this Oskar?"
"Mummy kept it. She used to tell me stories about you, about how you 'helped the hopeless'. And about Spike and how he used to make her laugh. But that stopped when Lucy was born, and Dad wouldn't let her talk about you. Then I found it last week. Will you help us please? Mummy and me and Lucy and the new baby?"
"What's your last name Oskar?"
"Osborne."
"And how old are you and Lucy?"
"I'm ten, Lucy's seven."
"Where is Lucy?"
"At school I expect, I'm meant to be too but I had to talk to you. Please will you help? Mummy said you always helped those in trouble, but then Dad shut her up. He said she loved the 'damn vampires' more than him." Spike spoke for the first time since introducing the two,
"How old's the baby Oskar?"
"Only a few months. I found Mummy crying and asked her what was wrong. She thinks Dad's going to kill both her and it when he finds out. It doesn't show yet, but it will soon, and you have to help us before then."
"What's your Mummy's name, Oskar?"
"Lilah."
"Lilah?" Spike and Angel looked at each other thinking of the only Lilah they'd ever known. And killed.
"But that's not her real name. She used to be called something else. Something prettier, but then Dad made her change it and dye her hair. I have a picture, it's very old, I found it in some pictures Dad made Mummy throw away." From the bag on his back, Oskar produced a crumpled photograph "I think she looks pretty in it." he let the sentence hang "she's the one I the middle. I don't know who the other two are." Angel unfolded the print
"It's Buffy, Willow and Xander."
"That's it. Willow. I knew it was something pretty. Those are Buffy and Xander? She used to talk about them too. she doesn't any more." Angel walked over to the door and opened it
"Gunn!" It was only a moment before the black man in his early thirties appeared
"You yelled?"
"Gunn, can you take Oskar here to get some food from the kitchen? Spike and I have a few things to discuss." Gunn nodded
"Oskar, this is Gunn. Go with him and we'll follow you down in a minute." Oskar looked hesitant
"Mummy never talked about someone called Gunn."
"Gunn never lived in the same place as Mummy so they never really knew each other. Look, you'll only be a few rooms away and if you need our help, we'll hear okay?" Reluctantly he nodded and then left the room with Gunn. When they were sure the pair couldn't hear them, the vampires began to talk.
"Last I heard Willow and Oz were happily married in New York."
"How long ago was that, Peaches?"
"Ten years ago at a guess. When Buffy died I never tried to recontact her."
"I got a letter about eight years ago saying she was pregnant. My reply got returned in the mail and I haven't heard anything since. I tried to see her once in NY, but they'd gone. No forwarding address."
"That must've been when-"
"When what? When Oz started beating on her and her children?"
"Spike, we can't go jumping to assumptions like that."
"Like what? He as good as said it."
"As good as isn't the same as 'he did say it.'"
"And Willow's worried for the life of her unborn baby because."
"Did you see a mark on the boy?"
"No, but I could smell the blood just below the surface, the bruising. He's careful. He doesn't hit them where it's obvious." Angel sighed
"You're right. I'd say he's got a cracked rib too."
"He looks just like her. I couldn't place it when he first came in and then he smiled. I tried to ignore it but I knew. From then on I knew who he was."
"He's not a lycanthrope."
"No. It mustn't be hereditary with his strain."
"Say his name."
"What?"
"You're avoiding saying his name- why?"
"I trusted him to take care of her. I failed her. His name makes it real."
"You failed her?"
"What're we going to do then Peaches?"
"Don't say what you're about to."
"What's that?"
"Barge in there and kill the bastard."
"It'd work."
"Only if it didn't push Willow further away from us. We have to talk to her. Let's go see the boy." The duo entered the kitchen to see Gunn talking animatedly, reciting a story to Oskar, whose eyes were shining in amusement, suddenly he broke into a grin. Spike was right. His hair was dark- almost black, but apart from that he was almost a carbon copy of his mother.
"And then the princess turned into a really big dove and I had to ride her to find her prince who was the only one who could break the spell."
"And wasn't I there all the way being gripped to death by a certain young man who decided he didn't like heights?" Angel reminded as he and Spike rounded the table. Gunn glared at the vampire and the pair were rewarded by another smile from Oskar
"Hey, Darkie?" Oskar turned to look at Spike, a reminiscent glint in his eye
"AA used to call me that"
"AA?"
"Auntie Anya. She hated the auntie part- said it made her feel like she should be knitting socks, so I cut it to AA. I haven't seen her since Lucy was born though."
"Can I call you it?"
"Yeah, I like it. Mummy and Lucy call me Oakie. Dad calls me 'son' or 'boy'- depending on his mood." Spike remembered the flinch when he had called Oskar son, regretting his earlier mistake
"Well Darkie, d'you think it'd be possible for us to meet up with your mum?"
"I don't know. If Dad found out- but it would make Mummy happy. I know it would. Can I 'phone you tomorrow?"
"Sure. Angel, get him the number." Suddenly Oskar looked up in fear at something behind Gunn's head. Spike spotted the clock hanging on the wall. It was three fifteen
"I'm late. Mummy will be picking Lucy up. If I'm late, I'll make her late, and Dad won't be happy. I have to go." The boy stood, frantic, and began to look around for his coat. Not stilled until Spike placed a hand on his shoulder
"Gunn can drive you," seeing the protest about to form he held a finger up to silence the boy, "not all the way, just to nearby." Oskar accepted and five minutes later they were gone.
Only when Angel had retired to his room did Spike allow his bloody tears to escape his eyes.
~Part: 2~
"Why hasn't he called, Angel?"
"I'm sure there's a good reason."
"Like what?"
"School." Spike began pacing again.
"Spike sit down. I'm sure he'll call soon."
"And if he doesn't?"
"He will."
"But what if something happens? What if he finds out?"
"If we hear nothing by tomorrow night, we find them."
"And if it's too late?"
"It won't be. Stop stressing."
"I can't."
"You didn't even like Willow that much, did you?"
"I didn't like her? I didn't like her? Hell Angel, I was in love with the girl."
"What?"
"She was my mate. I friggin' claimed her."
"Your mate? Did- does she know?"
"Of course she knows, it's not the kind of thing you can keep a secret."
"No, I guess it isn't."
"Now do you see why I'm like this?" Angel nodded "I failed her Angel, I promised to take care of her for eternity and it's only been fifteen years."
"Oh Spike." Angel stood and hugged his pacing childe. "We're going to find her and we're going to make sure her, and Lucy and Oskar, and the new baby are fine. Understood?" Spike nodded and then began to cry into his sire's shoulder, silently, while Angel just held him. The scene was disturbed by someone clearing their throat. Angel turned to see Gunn.
"The little fellow's here."
"Here?"
"That's what I said. He ain't looking so good."
"How do you mean?"
"You'll see." The three men made their way through to the kitchen where Oskar was waiting. As the boy came into Spiek's line of sight, his heart fell. The boy hardly looked to be the same person as he was yesterday, his hair was dirty and in need of combing, a light had died in his eyes and there was a purpling bruise o his right cheek, just below the eye. The vampire knew from experience that for a bruise to come up that colour in such a short amount of time, there must have been incredible force behind the impact.
"Hey Darkie. What happened?" Looking up at the blonde vampire, Oskar allowed several tears to fall down his cheek
"The baby." a sob escaped his body and Spike found himself encompassing the boy in his arms. He felt a kinship to the little guy, probably originating from his bond to Oskar's mother.
"Don't worry. Take your time."
"Spike, why do I feel like this? Like you're meant to be my protector?"
"Maybe because I was once your mother's protector."
"My mother's-" A fresh sob escaped "He found out. He said she was a- a- a whore. Mummy's not a whore. But I don't' think she's pregnant anymore. There was so much blood." The boy trailed off as he clung to Spike with a fresh round of sobs.
Spike felt something inside him breaking, making him want to never let this boy out of his arms, to protect him from the world, while at the same time wanting to rip his throat out for laying a finger on Darkie and Red.
"Daddy's going away tonight. That's why I came. You can meet Mummy. She works in a little café. I can take you there now." Spike looked at his sire who nodded.
"Okay, let us grab our coats."
"I have to pick up Lucy from her after school club first."
"Fine."
Twenty minutes later, Spike, Angel, Oskar and his sister Lucy walked up to the bar- stroke- diner, the car having been abandoned when Lucy refused to get in with strangers
"Darkie?" The boy and Lucy stopped to look at Spike, "How do you want to do this?"
"We should all go in together."
"Okay." The bell above the door jangled as the quartet entered. A large blonde woman turned to examine them
"They with you Oakie?" Oskar nodded in reply
"Can you fetch Mummy?" The woman gave a tight nod then turned and put her head through a door
"Lilah? Your boy wants you out here."
"Send him through."
"He isn't alone Li, got some guys with him."
"What?" The sound of hurried footsteps echoed through the cheap building "Oakie, what've I told you? It's not safe for your friends to-" The woman stopped mid- flow as she entered the main room of the café.
"Mummy? I brought some people to see you."
"Spike? Angel? Oakie why've you brought them here?"
"I told him not to- I said strange men were bad and that you wouldn't want to see them." The small girl ran to her mother's arms
"Good girl Luce. Answer my question O."
"They're Spike and Angel, Mummy. Aren't you glad to see them?"
"Oskar, you know-"
"I know, Mummy, but we need their help."
"We don't need help from anyone, Oskar. I'm sorry gentlemen, my son seems to have been spinning tales again, you've had a wasted trip- I'll make sure he doesn't bother you again." She turned back towards the double doors with Lucy. Oskar opened his mouth to speak, but Spike beat him to it.
"Red." She stopped in the doorway
"I'm not your Red anymore."
"I can feel your pain. The bruises on your stomach and legs."
"Shut up Spike. After fifteen years I've had enough of your claiming nonsense."
"Nonsense?"
"I thought you said I'd be like a vam- like you only not? How do you explain these two?" She nodded at Oskar and Lucy.
"You never completed it Red." She snorted
"Whatever."
"It's true Red. How do you explain that you don't look like you've hit your mid- twenties yet, luv?"
"I've aged."
"About a year for every mortal five."
"Tina, would you take Lucy and get her a drink from out back." The blonde looked from the two men by the door to her colleague and then back to the ten year old she knew and loved. She felt sure these men were bad news, but Lilah trusted them enough to leave herself in a room with them and Oakie- and she trusted Lilah. Or trusted her enough to protect her son.
"Sure thing. Cummon, Luce."
"After fifteen years you think you can still waltz into my life, playing hero. If the two of you knew what was good for you-"
"We'd what? Ignore a cry for help? Forget someone showing up on our doorstep asking us to save his mother?"
"Leave him out of this. If it hadn't have been me, you would've left it all to Angel. You may have changed, but you're not that different, Spike. Him asking Angel was an affront to your pride because you felt it was your place not his. After all this time it's still your pride that gets you riled up."
"Baby, nothing's gotten me riled up since the day you left." The redness covering the woman's face was not the embarrassment it once would have been, but pure anger as she stepped up to the vampire and hit him squarely in the jaw.
"That's for the comment," she hit him again before starting on an assault of words and fists "That's for claiming me. That's for making me love you. That's for Buffy. That's because she never staked you." Each phrase was accentuated with another blow "That's for existing. And. and that's for showing up in my life again." She ended her attack with a sob as Angel stepped in.
"Spike, Willow, sit down. Oakie, go get a jug of water and some glasses." The boy disappeared behind the counter as the bell jangled above the above the entrance. Angel had completely forgotten where they were.
"Tina, Mr Johnston's here."
Thanks Oakie." Angel tuned the conversation between the three out as he again focussed on Spike and Willow
"Now you two have history- most of which I know nothing about, but that's not the issue here, you and your home life are, Willow."
"You know nothing about my home life."
"We know your son fears for your life and thinks he no longer had a second sibling." Willow glared at Angel, trying to defy him yet not denying a word he'd said. It was Willow that broke the eye contact first as Oskar rejoined the group.
"Mummy, did I do the wrong thing? I was only worried about you." Willow took the boy into her lap
"No baby, I understand why you did what you did."
"Will you let us help you Willow?" Green eyes lit with indecision before they set firm
"No."
"You're going to die unless you get help soon."
"I'm not going to die Spike, stop being so melodramatic."
"You have a tiny internal bleed. It's only a few cells large but it's there, and it's growing. The blood you're losing isn't doing what it should. Instead of fixing the problem, it's keeping it open. You'll die unless you're treated within a couple of hours."
"You're lying."
"I can feel it, Red. If I want to, I can feel every single cell in your body, the bruises, the fractures, the cuts. If I try real hard I can do Darkie and Fairy too."
"Stay the hell out of my children."
"It's still there. It's dead."
"Shut up."
"Didn't you want to know how it was Red? That's your son."
"Why are you so damn concerned Spike? You've done nothing for the past seven years; you haven't felt what I've been through. Your precious link has done nothing for me."
"You told me to shut it off and I did. I felt jolts of pain or intense emotion occasionally, but I figured you'd fallen down the stairs or a friend had died. I didn't want to interfere. You told me not to. I'd follow any order you gave me. Both then and now." Placing Oskar on the floor, the woman who was once Willow Rosenburg stood
"I'm leaving this conversation gentlemen. Sunnydale and everything associated with it are out of my life now. For good. If either of you come near me, my children or my husband ever again, I have no doubt LA has many naturally lit custody cells. I am no longer Willow, Red or your Luv, and would advise you to remember that I do not answer to those names. Good day." Taking her son by the hand, Lilah Osborne backed away from the table before turning and heading to the kitchen. Two minutes later, Tina entered from the same door and headed to where the vampires were sitting.
"I'm going to have to ask you to leave." Angel looked about to protest but it was Spike that replied calmly
"Sure. Anything to please a lady. Could you give- Lilah, this." He handed the waitress a napkin with something written on it. She nodded tightly in reply.
"Good day gentlemen."
"Good day."
"Aye. That it is."
~Part: 3~
"Spike, what are you planning?"
"Nothing yet." Angel looked over and glared at his childe
"The day you're not planning anything is the day I wear a pink tutu and a tiara to my midday picnic."
"Fine, I'm not planning anything you have to know about." Shaking his head at the pain-in-the-ass, bleach-blonde vampire, known as Spike, Angel tried a different tack
"Did she leave you?"
"Sort of."
"You let her go?"
"In a way." This surprised the elder of the two. If one thing could be said about Spike it was that he fought. He believed in following his passions to an extreme level and it was not in his nature to give up on someone he loved.
"What happened?"
"Not now. Right now we have to figure out other stuff."
"Like how to protect them?"
"Exactly."
***
"Mummy please."
"Oakie, we're not going through this again. Spike wasn't telling the truth, I'm fine."
"But what if he wasn't lying? What then Mummy?"
"Baby, there are some people in this world who were born to lie. People trust them because what they say is so genuine, or because they are so skilled at pulling it off, or because people want to believe in what they're saying. But those people you can never trust, everything they say is a lie. Spike is one of those people." Lilah felt a tear come to her eye, felt the resolve and shields she'd built around Willow Rosenburg start to drop away. They'd been weakened so much by seeing her old love that it didn't take much for them to start to fall. Pulling them together, Lilah faced her son.
"That's not what you used to say, you used to tell me that you trusted him with your life."
"Don't be silly Oakie. Now come on, you haven't told me what Mrs Parshaw said at school today." Keeping half an ear on her son, Lilah thought back to the conversation they had had all those years ago. It was just after Lucy had been born, and after putting her daughter to bed, she sat down with her son to wait for Oz to come home
"Mummy, when two people fall in love do they have to get married?"
"Not always. Sometimes people don't want to get married and they're very happy."
"But why did you marry Daddy, Mummy? You love lots of people, why did you choose Daddy?"
"To marry someone you have to love and trust them very much and want to spend the rest of your life with them. And it has to be a very special type of love."
"You said that Xander's special. Why didn't you marry him?"
"AA's married to Xander. And I don't know if I could live with him forever and ever. He can be very annoying. And you two would argue all the time."
"Well what about Percy? He's nice."
"He can't keep a secret for two minutes- I couldn't trust him."
"What about Angel?"
"I don't love Angel."
"Spike?" Willow didn't know how to answer him this time. Just the name brought up emotions she didn't want to think about, and she could hardly explain vampirism and its politics to a four year old. She answered her son in a haze
"Do you love him?"
"With all my heart."
"And you trust him?"
"With my life."
"Then why-"
"Because I married Daddy instead, and if I hadn't then I wouldn't have you and Lucy to love forever either."
~Part: 4~
Lilah remembered the conversation vividly. It was the last real discussion she'd had with anyone about her Sunnydale connections. Two weeks later they'd moved to LA and Oz- her Oz- had hit her for the first time. She'd been so shocked when it happened, and he'd been so sorry that it wasn't until months later that she realised how far in she was- and by then it was too late. Too late to stop him, and too late to leave him. The night she'd realised what was going on with her life was the night she'd buried Willow Rosenburg as deeply as she possibly could, she hated that a part of her was gone, she hated that night as it was stirred up for the first time in so long in her memories,
"You've been talking to him."
"Oz, he's my son, I can't do anything but."
"He's been talking about them- Xander, Giles, Percy. Spike." The last word was spat out in disgust and a glint appeared in his eye that was nothing but animal
"Oz he doesn't mean to. They're names he's heard, people he's met. He isn't going to forget things just because you want him to."
"But you bring them up. He talks because you bring them up."
"No- I- Not intentionally." Willow felt desperation creep into her as her husband turned around.
"Oskar!"
"Oz no, don't bring him into this."
"Why not Willow?"
"Dad?" The small frame of the boy appeared in the bedroom doorway
"Go get ready for bed Oakie." Willow smiled at her son
"No. Son, tell me, did Mummy talk about Spike today?" Looking at his mother's face he saw the worry there
"No." Oz knelt down so he was level with his son. Oskar looked at his shoes
"Don't lie to me boy. Now did Mummy mention Spike today?"
"No."
"Oz stop it, you're frightening him. He's told you what you want to know."
"He's lying. Aren't you son, Mummy told you not to say anything."
"She didn't."
"Oz, please."
"Shut up."
"No, just stop it, stop it." A single tear made its way down her cheek
"I said shut up."
"Oskar, go to your room."
"Don't you dare move." Confused by the double orders, Oskar looked desperately between his parents. The look on his father's face frightened him and he took a step backwards.
"I said don't move!" Willow looked in horror at her son sprawled on the floor holding his face
"Oskar." Willow ran to her son
"Leave him." She found herself suddenly thrown to the bed.
"Oz, let me-"
"Will you just shut up?"
"Mummy?"
"Oskar go." This time Oz didn't argue, ignoring his son he advanced on his wife.
"Do you never just shut up woman? You have an opinion on everything. Do you never think that maybe I don't want to hear it?"
"Just calm down. We'll wake Lucy up."
"I don't' care. Maybe she can also learn what a whore her mother is."
"I'm not a whore, Oz, I have never-"
"You've never thought of another man when we're together? We both know that's a lie." She didn't have enough energy to fight him anymore. Seeing her son cowering, hurt and terrified and unable to help him had taken too much from her
"Oz-"
"You're nothing but a cheap slut. You say you love me, you marry me, but when I'm inside you it's him that you think of."
"No, it's not like that."
"Well I've had it. I will make you remember who it is that's fucking you."
That night, cut, bruised and sore, she'd laid curled up on her side of the bed. She hadn't moved since he'd left. Her mind had been devoid of thoughts for almost an hour, but now, in the dark, words began to form in her head
"So this is what rape feels like."
She couldn't believe this was happening to her. This was Oz, her Oz. Oz loved her. And she was Willow. Willow was a good person, who never did anything to harm anyone and always repaid her debts- she was a good person. She was. Was.
"Good people do not let their sons get hit. Willow Rosenburg does not put someone she cares about in danger. Willow Rosenburg would not get herself into this situation."
Something tugged on her sheets and she looked into her son's face. It was dark but she could still see the bruise that had formed. Letting Oskar into her bed she realised that her husband had been right- she wasn't, couldn't be, Willow Rosenburg anymore. Willow wouldn't just be lying here. Willow Rosenburg was dead; she was Lilah, Lilah Osbourne.
But now, almost seven years later, Lilah had to push Willow back down. The part of her that wanted to trust in Spike and Angel was shut up by the part that for five years had believed that Spike would come save her and her two children. For five years she had lived in hope only to eventually realise that Daniel- as he'd been to her from that night- had been right- she was stuck in this marriage and no one was going to save her. With a start she realised that Oakie was no longer speaking
"Mummy, I don't think you're well. Please let me take you to the hospital." With shaky resignation, she nodded.
~Parts 5 & 6~
"Spike, I'm not sure this is such a good idea."
"Well I happen to think it's an excellent idea."
"I'm with the big guy here, if she didn't want to see you two, then what makes you think she'll want to see the other four?"
"She won't want to, that's the point." Daring the other two to defy him, Spike picked up the phone. Unfortunately for him, Angel dared.
"Spike, if we're not careful, we're going to end up alienating her even more. She doesn't want to see people from Sunnydale and she doesn't want to be helped."
"So what? You're just going to let him get away with hurting them? The three of them need us, whether she wants to admit it or not." The two of them faced each other for a moment before Spike continued
"I really think that enlisting help from the New York team could help."
"I don't."
"Look, even if they can't get close to Willow, Oz might be willing to trust them- at least enough to let them talk to her."
"Not yet."
"Not yet?"
"Give it a couple of days, then we phone. Deal?"
"I guess, but what do we do until then?"
"I want to get some back story." Spike looked almost nervously at his sire, anticipating where this was headed. He didn't want to get into his and Willow's "back story," fifteen years wasn't a long time for a vampire, and some of the wounds were still fresh. There was stuff in there he didn't want to admit to, stuff he was still ashamed of; stuff that had driven Willow away.
"What type of back story?"
"Back story that might indicate how long this has been going on, how serious it is, whether he's been caught. Things that involve you and that computer." Spike sighed, police and medical records he could cope with, he'd always loved the technology age, and Willow had taught him how to get to the good stuff when they were together. Since then he'd used the knowledge to help Angel.
The medical records showed what the three had expected: Daniel Osborne had almost nothing except for some minor lacerations from an RTA, and a case of appendicitis, but Lilah, Oskar and Lucy Osborne had all been admitted to hospital numerous times for various accidents- Lilah had had a broken jaw from a mugging, Oskar had fallen off his bike and fractured his arm and one of his ribs, and Lucy had various incidences where she's ended up unconscious which was attributed to a knock on the head when she had been 6 months old.
"I don't think that Lucy's original accident was Oz." Angel's opinion was met with disbelief
"What?"
"Look- all the other cases have happened when Willow was around, if you look it was Oz that brought Lucy in, Willow isn't recorded until she was discharged
"So?"
"So I have a feeling that his attacks are probably centred around Willow, and I don't' think that if it was likely that Oz was going to start on the two, she would have left them alone with him." Accepting the vampire's explanation, Gunn voiced his thoughts
"That does beg the question though,"
"What question?"
"If Willow is as caring as you've always said, and she knows that her children are in trouble, why would she stay with him?"
"I don't know. Even if she loves him I don't see her being willing to let him hurt them." Spike answered as he examined what he'd found on the screen
"She's got a record."
"What type of a record."
"Psychiatric."
"What sort of psychiatric?"
"It just says 'PND; see file.'"
"Isn't that her file?"
"It means paper file, now that hackers are so common, some people just keep paper or offline computers instead of installing all the latest security measures."
"So we can't see that?"
"No."
"What's PND? Something-something-depression?"
"I'm guessing, I can run a quick-"
"Post-natal depression." The two vampires looked to Gunn, "It's nasty, and it never really leaves. But we could do with that file, see how it manifested itself, and if anything in particular- wait, do you have a date on it?"
"Yeah, here, about four months after Willow's first- incident, one month after Darkie's."
"How long after Lucy was born?"
"About seven, eight months."
"Try social services, see what they have." Gunn watched Spike work and a feeling of dread began to enter him and then penetrate the rest of the room, he'd seen mild forms of PND, and he got the feeling that this would not be a mild case
"Osborne, Lilah, Daniel, Oskar, Lucy. Regular checks conducted on Lilah and Oskar, slightly less frequently on Lucy and Daniel. Then reports on checks from the past five years."
"Go to the first."
"These are scanned notes, let me see. 'The stress of a second child on this family is overwhelming. For father and son, the two males have almost no connection with one another and Lilah's PND, although it does appear to have been delayed, is at such a stage where she cannot bare to even be in the same room as either of her children. I hate the fact it was not caught sooner and only wish there was more I could do than administer drugs and hope for results. I can tell she's a good mother, who loves her children, and it must be unbearable for both her and her son to have to cope with this. The daughter must be monitored for side-effects resulting from her early exposure to such a condition.' Do you want me to go on?" Spike looked up.
"No- that answers my question."
"It does?"
"The onset of PND coincides with when Oz started his attacks on Oakie, and presumably Lucy too, she probably blamed herself for what was happening to them all, rather than Oz, which culminated in her essentially rejecting Dar- Oskar and Lucy."
"And that answers-"
"PND can go into recession, can be controlled by drugs- even completely disappear- but it can come back at any time, seemingly without a trigger. If Willow were to leave her husband, she'd be forced to leave the children behind, she'd be deemed unfit for guardianship. He'd have full custody."
"Full- but- what if we could prove what he's done- what he's doing." Angel answered for Gunn.
"They'd be put into care- Willow would gain visiting rights, but that's about it."
"So she's stuck with him?"
"For now."
***
"Mrs Osborne, are you aware that you've been pregnant?"
"I- that is- yes."
"I know this sounds harsh, but I must ask, at any point since you first found out did you consider an abortion?"
"Not once, why?"
"Do you think your husband would?"
"Why? It doesn't matter now, does it? It's dead."
"You sound very certain of that."
"You've said I've been pregnant- past tense, plus there's not that much blood if everything's okay. I'm guessing you're here to break the bad news to me."
"Mrs Osborne- Lilah, the reason I'm asking this is that your internal bleeding, coupled with your miscarriage looks an awful lot like a forced abortion."
"A what?" Understanding of what this woman was implying to her suddenly sparked. "You think I tried to kill my baby? How dare you?"
"Lilah, your past medical records-"
"You mean my history of depression."
"Yes your history, would suggest that-"
"That I hate my children."
"I never said-"
"But you thought." The woman didn't reply. "I have to get home, get Lucy and Oskar home. I have things to do before Daniel gets home. Is there anything else you need me for? No, well I have to go." She stood and gathered her things, heading towards the children's play area.
"Mrs Osborne, Mrs Osborne. You don't understand, there's a blood clot-" Putting coats onto Oakie and Luce, Lilah left the waiting area, followed by a suspicious look from her son, and a despairing last thought from the doctor. "If it's left there it could kill you."
~Part 7~
She didn't understand what was going on. She loved Oakie and trusted what he did, but those men- they'd made Mummy sad, and now she was back here. Lucy knew that most other people in her class didn't even know this building existed. For them, if someone was sick or had an accident, you phoned 911, but Lucy knew that if you did that, they brought you here. She hated it here. She didn't show off the knowledge she had, she didn't see any point. It would be better if her friends never knew what happened here.
Mr Hannon, her teacher, had been talking about hospitals in class today. He said that when people were poorly, you went there and they made you better, Lucy thought she liked the sound of those- until he'd brought out a picture of this building. They'd never made her better; she still fell asleep whenever she hurt her head. And Mummy was ill a lot.
Maybe these men that Oakie had found were special doctors, and were going to make Mummy better- or maybe they'd only make things worse and Daddy would get cross like he did when the lady came around to look at Mummy.
She wished she could do something to help Mummy, or Oakie, or Daddy- or even the lady or those two men. But she didn't understand what they all wanted, or why they weren't all happy about a new baby brother or sister for her.
Last week, Mr Hannon had wanted everyone in her class to write about their families. She'd just started to get good at her letters- even Miss Wright, the classroom assistant had said so, and she was usually really mean- and Lucy was beginning to feel really proud of herself, because of her being 'unconscious' a lot- she'd just learnt that word- sometimes the other people in her class knew things and could do things a long time before she could, but making the swirly 'e's, nice round 'o's and pretty 'f's she found much easier than some of her friends did. She'd taken a long time carefully writing out five lines about each of the people in her family:
"I call my brother Oskar Oakie. Oakie sometimes helps cook supper Oakie wears shorts that look very big on him. Oakie's favourite colour is blue I love Oakie very much."
"Daddy is very big Daddy likes music Sometimes Daddy gets cross Daddy never cooks- his carrots turn to mush. Daddy works all day, and sometimes all night too."
"Mummy is very pretty She likes computers and candles Sometimes Mummy gets sick and Oakie and I look after her. Mummy works with Tina Mummy would one day like a dog."
It had taken her all of an afternoon to write it, she got Mummy to spell out any words she didn't know, or couldn't find in her reading book, and when she'd finished she got Oakie to read it and check for mistakes.
When he'd read it, he'd gone all funny, and then started talking to her in the voice he used when he thought she was being stupid. He said that she couldn't say that Daddy was big and got cross, or that Mummy got ill a lot, because then someone might come and take Mummy away from them.
Lucy didn't understand what her brother was saying to her, but he was clever and he didn't think that what she'd written was right, so she'd changed it.
The lady in the bad building had made Mummy cross and that made Lucy unhappy. This was supposed to be a fun weekend. Daddy wasn't home and Mummy had promised her and Oakie a strawberry sorbet and a chocolate cake.
Now that Oakie had found the two men with the funny hair, Lucy didn't think she was going to be happy at all.
~Part 8~
He'd been trying to help, she knew that, but.
She didn't need her son to take care of her, she didn't need Spike and Angel to come riding on their high horses to rescue her, she did just fine on her own.
Unlocking the door, she ushered the children inside and told Oskar to start running a bath for Lucy. If they all bathed now and again in the morning, then the scent of the vampires and the hospital would hopefully be gone before Daniel came home tomorrow night.
Lucy followed Oskar to the bedroom and Lilah smiled. She loved how close they were, how when neither her or Daniel was available, they were happy to be together, how their arguments were so short-lived. She moved to her bedroom to change her clothes. As she opened the door, she froze, for a little while, she'd almost forgotten what had happened this morning, but the bloodstained sheets were a very barefaced reminder. Sighing, she put down her bag by the door and headed towards the bed. She took the bedclothes and bundled them in her arms, before heading downstairs to the washing machine.
She took carpet cleaner from under the sink and went back upstairs to work on the mattress and floor around the bed.
"Mummy?" Lilah jumped up and almost ran to the door to meet Lucy. They arrived in the doorway at the same time and Lilah shut the door behind her.
"Yes honey?"
"Can I have my bath with you?"
"Not tonight, I've got to do some things right now, but in the morning we'll have one together okay?"
"Is Oakie going to watch me now?"
"Yes." Lucy began to turn away, before spinning back.
"Mummy?"
"Yes?"
"I don't like it in that place."
"I know baby, I'm sorry."
"Is Oakie in trouble?" Lilah sighed.
"Honey, what he did was wrong. He and I have to talk."
"But. are you going to tell Daddy?"
"No. Go on and have your bath."
"I love you Mummy." Lilah smiled, bittersweet, at Lucy's back. Sometimes children knew just the right thing to say or do. She disappeared into the bathroom, and Lilah listened to her excited chatter as she told her brother about being invited to a friend's party, before turning back into the bedroom to continue cleaning and tidying up.
It was twenty minutes before Oskar appeared in the doorway.
"Oakie, you startled me." He didn't say anything. "Where's Lucy?"
"Watching cartoons."
"You two watch too much television." She knew there was no venom behind the words; she was too tired to add any conviction to them.
"Lucy said you wanted to talk to me." She cocked her head, looking at him a minute before heading to the closet to collect fresh linen. He was always so serious; sometimes she forgot he was only ten, he was so unlike Xander had been at that age; so similar to how she had imagined Oz being.
"You shouldn't have found them, shouldn't have got them involved."
"I had to do something Mum. I had to help."
"I don't need help Oskar."
"I didn't do it for you." He was looking at his feet, kicking at the carpet.
"Then-"
"I did it for me. And for Lucy and the baby."
"Why?"
"Because I'm scared and I hate him."
"Oskar he's your father- you don't hate him."
"I do. He's mean and nasty and pretends to be nice."
"Don't talk about him like that."
"Why not?"
"Because then you're the one being mean and nasty, and I will not have my son bad-mouthing others, especially not his own father." Oskar glared at her, unwilling to cry or shout or stamp his foot, but sorely tempted.
"Why do you love him? He doesn't love you."
"Yes he does."
"I thought love was a beautiful-"
"Oskar stop it. I love your father, that isn't going to end, and he loves me. You're too young to understand what that means."
"But-"
"Stop it, just stop it, or so-help-me, I will tell him what you've done." His eyes widened in shock, before turning to slits and hardening. She'd never said anything like that before. How dare she now?
He left the room and closed the door behind him. Five minutes later, when he heard her crying through it as he passed, he kept walking. If she was going to be mean to him, then he could be mean right back.
~Part 9~
"Spike."
"Angel."
"Hungry?"
"No."
"What's on TV?"
"Nothing." Despite the other vampire's obvious displeasure, Angel sat down opposite his childe.
"I remember the day I lost them." Spike's eyes moved toward Angel before again fixing upon a non-existent dot on the magnolia wall.
"I'm not going to talk to you about it- about her." The elder of the two ignored him.
"If I'd been five minutes quicker- if the computer had shut down properly, and didn't keep performing 'illegal operations,' if I'd used the stairs rather than being lazy and waiting for the elevator, if I'd just used the ten dollar note in the kiosk instead of going through my eight pockets for the right change- and why did I need to get the damn magazine right then anyway? But I got there and that was it. There was blood and. pieces everywhere. I never found her right ear or hand." Spike was focussed now as Angel bared his soul. He saw Gunn in the doorway listening too. "They should have been able to handle themselves- they normally did. They should have been able to handle themselves- they normally did. They only had to hold fort for twenty minutes as I drove home, printed out the incantation and got back. But I was driving and I suddenly saw her face- she'd landed a modelling contract and there she was, smiling from the front of one of those women's magazines. I had to get it; celebrate her victory once we beat the demon and it wasn't like the danger was that great, they were literally just sat waiting for me to get back, but when I did.
"Wesley's face would have been comical- had it not been separate from the back of his skull. Doyle looked. sort of drunk and Cordelia. I wouldn't have even known she was there if I couldn't smell her. or if there weren't too many pieces for just the two of them. I've seen some things. I've been the cause of many, but. I'll never forget their faces." There was silence for a long minute before Spike spoke.
"How long after Buffy?"
"About four years. About two before you came."
"I should've been with them." The vampires looked up at Gunn.
"Then you'd be dead too."
"Where were you?"
"Patrolling my 'hood. Angel gave me a night off, I used it to help my boys."
"Buff asked me how I killed my slayers and I said they just lost the will to live and then I lunged. Three months later I watched the same light go out of her eyes as some fledge attacked her. I promised I'd look after The Hellmouth, even as Rupert left for England and Xander and Anya left for New York. Then Willow and he left with Percy to join them about a year later. Left me with Tara and Riley. They were good kids; their hearts were in the right places. I never really appreciated them until they were gone. They were just sucked dry- not just blood, but everything- all that was left was bone, nails and hair, and a bit of skin to hold it all together. Not even enough to properly bury. I hate this job we do."
"Then why do it?"
"It's all I've got worth doing. Plus it keeps me busy and makes me think that one day she'll come back to me. Or it did." Gunn laughed bitterly.
"So now we're left with two vampires and an aging black dude in LA, two Harris' and daughter with Percy in NY, a pensioner in England, a wife-beating werewolf and a woman in denial. If I said that the side of good was slightly lacking, would anyone disagree?"
"We used to think ourselves invincible. Look at us now."
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