Willow awoke to the buzzing of her alarm clock and
the soft sound of rain on the roof.  She felt
refreshed and ready to actually face a day in school
for the first time since Buffy's birthday.  She
climbed out of bed and stretched her slightly sore
limbs, heading for the shower.  The warm water
cascading over her made her momentarily forget all of
her problems and dwell on the man who had in so many
ways helped her last night.  She knew she had seen a
side of him that he let so few people ever see.  There
had been a certain warmth in her eyes that reminded
her of why she had to go on.  He had wrapped his cool
hands around her aching heart and made some of the
dull ache go away.  For that she was eternally
grateful.  She had meant what she'd told him.  She
would do anything for him; he had only to ask.  For
now he was her only friend, even if that had not been
the offer.
She climbed out of the shower reluctantly and quickly
dressed in order to make it to school on time.  If
there was one thing that was akin to mutiny in the
Willowverse it was being late for school, whether or
not she actually wanted to be there.  She grabbed her
book bag and ran out the door.
The bell for second period rang and she headed to the
library by force of habit.  She knew that Buffy and
Xander would be there.  It was their free period as
well and she figured Buffy could use all the moral
support she could muster.  She was still deep in
blaming herself for Angel going bad.  In a way it had
been, but Willow knew that Buffy would never have
slept with Angel if she'd known the truth.  She sighed
deeply and pushed the doors open, hoping with all her
might that Cordelia wouldn't be there.  If there was
anything that could shatter her new found tranquility
it was a few well-placed barbs by the Bitch Queen.
Buffy looked up as she heard the door swing open.
Xander was shoving his face full of twinkies as
always, and she couldn't talk to him.  The only person
she could talk to was Willow, who must be in the same
state of depression as she.  The boy she had wanted
for years was with her enemy, ouch.  She came face to
face with a decidedly chipper looking redhead on the
other side.
"My, Will, you're looking better today.  Did
something happen?," Buffy asked, looking over her best
friend.
"No, I've just been doing some thinking, and it
cleared my head a little," the redhead replied,
wrapping her friend in a strong hug.
"Of good things obviously," Xander said around a
mouthful of twinkie.
Willow nodded, settling in one of the chairs around
the table.  She reached out and snagged a piece of
twinkie from Xander, settling back into the chair.  He
glared at her indignantly but continued to eat at a
faster pace, incase she should try to get another.
"I've just been putting my life back into
perspective.  I have to be little Miss everything
can't be as  bad as it seems or I'll just go crazy, so
I've decided to do just that.  I've had it up to my
ears with denial," she said with a little smile.
Buffy looked at her friend understanding, and wishing
she could do the same.  She crooked her finger to her
friend and led her into the stacks.  Willow obediently
stood and followed the Slayer into the dim part of the
room.  She stopped in a nook where they were
surrounded on all sides by demonology.
"Does this mean you're actually okay with Xander and
Cordelia?," she asked softly.
"I think so," Willow said, a slightly confused look
coloring her face," I don't think okay is the right
word, more like ready to deal with.  I realized that
Xander has never seen me as anything but his best
friend and I can handle that.  There are other boys;
boys who will see me as a girl instead of one of the
guys, I just have to find one."
Buffy snorted and giggled," If you find this illusive
creature see if he has any single friends."
"Can do," she said smiling as well, glad that Buffy
had actually laughed, even if it wasn't really
supposed to be a joke.  It was the first laugh she'd
uttered in what seemed like ages.  For a brief moment
the old Buffy shone behind the dull gleam that was her
shield.
"Will, I'm really sorry that I've been such a bad
friend for the last couple of days," she said, looking
Willow in the eye.
"I understand, and I haven't been entirely myself
either.  We'll deal, I promise, and we'll do it
together, like best friends are supposed to," Willow
said, engulfing her in a big hug.
"I don't know what I did to deserve a friend like
you, but whatever it is I'm gonna keep doing it.
You're the best Will.  None better," she said, a tear
leaking from the corner of her eye.
"No problem, buddy, just be yourself and I'll be your
best friend 'till the end of forever."
"We'd better go back, or Xander and Giles are gonna
think we ran away."
Willow nodded and headed back down, so glad that she
had reconciled things with Buffy.  She was still
several hours of internal therapy before she could
make up with Xander, but it would happen.  Maybe life
would work its self out.

Spike sat in his room listening to the rhythmic
creaking coming from Dru's room. The hate and pain
welled up inside of him as he thought of the antics
going on in there.  Oddly enough he really wished that
Willow was there to talk to him.  He had the feeling
she might just know what to say to make him feel
better.  He was in a state of depression that he had
previously not even known.  Dru rarely even looked at
him anymore.  When she did, it was out of pity,
bringing him food and pushing him around occasionally.
 Otherwise, her sire took up all of her time.  She
followed him with the same brand of unerring loyalty
that she always had.  She worshiped the ground the man
walked on, and he just used her to annoy the Slayer
and for all the free sex he could get.  It was tearing
Spike up inside to see her falling into the same
groove that he himself had drawn her out of all those
years ago.
He fought against the rage that built up inside his
chest.  He knew he wasn't strong enough to even
consider challenging his grandsire right now.  What
bothered him most was,  should he ever even consider
actually challenging Angelus, Dru would never speak to
him again.  She would never forgive him for
overthrowing her "Daddy."  It tore him up inside to
know that the woman he had given his love to for the
last hundred years had cast him off like so much
rubbish.  He glanced at the window hoping the sun
would go down soon.  He wanted to go out and find the
little redhead again in hopes that another talk with
her might lift his spirits a little.

Willow sat in the library after school, printing the
internet files on the demon Giles had said was coming
to town.  She knew that just because she had spent
last night being comforted by a demon didn't make her
any less of a white hat.  It was still the only thing
she could really do to keep her mind from the inner
turmoil that was losing a good friend.  She missed
Angel almost as much as Buffy did and it tore her up
inside, knowing he was out there hurting the same
people he had spent so long defending.  It hurt even
more to know that he considered her, who had once been
a friend and confidante, one of his greatest enemies.
He would gut her and think nothing of it.  It rent yet
another tear in her already holey heart.  Funny enough
she found herself wishing that she had Spike there to
talk to.  He had managed to make her feel alive again,
just by holding her when it was what she so
desperately needed.  She almost hoped she could run
into him again so they could have some more time to
talk.  She really found herself wanting to get to know
him better as an individual, instead of the brutal
killer all of the books had spelled out to her.  She
had seen another part of him just last night that
obviously no one in the books Giles kept lying around
had ever been able to see, a part of him that was
incredibly human and sweet.  He had held her like a
child and let her relieve her tears into his jacket
and never said a word.  He had just held her and made
her feel safe.  She had been too tired and weak to
fight any attempt he could have made to kill her last
night anyway.   She was just glad he had decided
instead to be her shoulder to cry on.
She looked outside and saw the sun was racing for the
horizon, knowing that he would be out and about soon,
seeking to get away from Angel. She knew instinctively
that had been why he was out the night before.  He
couldn't stand to stay another night with Angelus in
such close quarters.  She couldn't blame him, if it
was her and she knew Angelus as Angel she couldn't be
around the man with the face she had once trusted with
her life indefinitely. It would tear out her slowly
mending heart and stomp it into the ground.
Giles called off the research for the night, wanting
the entire gang to be indoors before sunset, knowing
as he did that Angelus knew where all of them lived
and would spare them a meeting out of doors after
dark.  Willow shuddered at the thought knowing that
most likely should that event occur whomever had
gotten the surprise would not be waking up in the
morning.  He hadn't had the chance to kill any of them
yet.  They had been careful beyond words, rarely if
ever out after dark, even usually out of the school
that he could get into before dark.  Mostly they
didn't know if they could ever pick up the pieces of
Buffy should he get his claws into one of them.
Willow grabbed her book bag and made for the doors of
the library.  They hadn't really been paying attention
and darkness was falling entirely too quickly for any
of their liking.  Willow would have to run to make it
home before the sun set entirely.  Regardless of her
pleasant meeting with one of Angelus' little family,
she didn't relish getting caught outside by any of the
others, especially Dru.  She was loony enough to just
not care that it would bring the Slayer down on their
heads like a plague of locusts on a fertile field.
The little redhead looked around in the encroaching
gloom and took off at a dead run for her house.
Willow had no sooner collapsed against the inside of
the door that night was announced by a breathy,
faraway scream.  She cringed, thinking of the fate
that the screamer was enduring when it abruptly cut
off.  As much as it killed her to hear the things that
went on in Sunnydale after-hours, it wasn't her place
to stop them now.  Alone and slayerless, she would
probably end up sharing in the same fate as those she
sought to protect.  She only hoped that the scream's
ending heralded a show of arms by the slayer and not
the alternative, which she didn't even want to
imagine.
Willow rose on shaky legs and headed for the phone to
let Giles know she was all right.  She lived farther
away from the school than any of the other scoobies,
and was the only one who really had to worry about
getting home before the sun set when Giles blew the
whistle.  The rest were within a few blocks of the
school, except the Slayer, who knew how to handle the
nighttime nasties all by herself.  After phoning Giles
and hearing that the others had phoned too and
completed the circle, she was able to relax a bit.
She collapsed on the couch and flicked the remote to
an old sci-fi movie.  They made her feel safe and
forget for a while that the world of make believe
isn't so fake.  She did tend to shy away from all of
the vampire movies though.  Far too many of them had
something to do with romance, and she knew firsthand
how those ended.  There were no bloody tears or sad
goodbye kisses, only a lot of pain followed by some
agony, and oh yeah, don't forget horror.  There was
much eating the friends of your beloved as well.
There were a hundred and one reasons why it should
never happen, and yet no one had listened to Giles
when he said that very thing, so now there was
Angelus.  Whee.
<Too many sad thoughts make for somber Willow.> She
thought unhappily.  She wanted nothing more than to be
joyous and carefree again like she had less than a
month ago.  Sure there was the occasional saving the
world required, but otherwise fun was had by all.
Willow was startled out of her reverie by a loud
knock at the door.  She jumped out of her comfy spot
to see who had come pounding on her door after dark.
She grabbed a stake as an afterthought just incase it
was one of the resident boogies and swung the door
wide.  Spike sat on the otherside looking more than a
little nervous. <What causes nervousness in a
vampire?> she wondered.
"Um . . .  can I come in luv?," he asked fidgeting.
"Why?," she asked, sort of confused.
"Angelus is tailing me.  He's a bit pissed at me," he
said, with a little grin," and I'd rather get in
before he sees where I am and with whom."
Willow blanched and stepped back from the door, her
eyes darting to the darkness beyond," Please come in
Spike," she said, swinging the door open fully.
He smiled and wheeled inside, shutting the door
firmly behind him.
"What'd you do to piss Angelus off?," Willow asked,
feeling horrible when the smile fell from the blonde's
handsome face.
"Just tried to get some alone time with my girl.
Stupid bloody wanker had to go and throw a fit because
I didn't ask first and that little bitch just backed
him up," Spike replied, his eyes flashing murderously.
Willow cringed and settled back onto the couch,
flipping the t.v. off so she could listen to Spike
with no interruptions.  It seemed he needed to talk
and she knew she owed him that and more.  "What did
you do?"
The smile returned for a moment, less brilliant, but
it was there all the same.  "I told the poof that we
had survived for a bloody long time before he had to
come and muck things up.  Why should I have to ask his
permission when I'm twice the man he is?"
Willow giggled, a soft smile gracing her lips.
"That's when he told me to get out of his lair.  HIS
lair!  If it wasn't for me that piece of shit would be
sleeping in a musty old crypt, hopefully with a
wonderful view of the sunrise.  But no, I had to be a
wanker and let him move in.  I thought it would make
Princess happy.  Well it did that, and ruined my damn
life in the process."  The smile was gone again,
replaced by a grim look that reminded Willow of the
look Xander got when the twinkies were gone.
"Oh, Spike, I'm so sorry.  Did Dru defend you?" She
asked, hoping that the loony bitch had the sense to
realize what she was losing out on if she didn't.
The grim look only blackened a little further, "No,
she nodded and said that bad little puppies should be
punished.  What the hell was I thinking trying to talk
to her anyways?  She made left no room for
interpretation where her loyalties lay.  To think I
wasted a bloody century on that bitch."
His narrative was abruptly stopped when he felt a
warm hand cover his clenched fist.  His eyes shot up,
encountering compassionate green ones, and for the
life of him, he couldn't stop the feeling of belonging
that rushed over him peering into that emerald gaze.
"It'll get better, Spike."
"How do you figure?  I just lost the love of my
unlife to my worst enemy.  I ought to just wait out
the sunrise and end this pitiful existence once and
for all."
"But you won't.  I can't let you," Willow said
softly.
"Why not pet?," he asked, hating himself for hurting
himself by trying to talk to Dru.  He knew how it was
going to end before he even thought the idea up.
"'Cause the world wouldn't be as bright without you,"
she said, mirroring the words he'd told her the night
before.
He looked up at her again surprised she'd remembered
with the state she'd been in last night.  He saw
something he hadn't seen in a very long time.
Thankfulness.  He knew instinctively he'd saved the
girl's life and she was grateful.  It was a nice
feeling, he decided.  "Thanks pet.  Consider the debt
repaid."
"What is this we're doing, Spike, not that I'm
complaining or anything, but I thought you hated me as
much as the prick."
He snorted at her term for his sire. "How can I hate
anyone who refers to my damn sire as the prick?," he
asked, the boyish smile returning.
"That's a good point you've got there, but I tend to
call it as I see it, and he's a prick.  The worst kind
because he couldn't just be happy with fucking up our
lives, he had to come in and fuck up yours as well.
It's to be expected with us.  We're mortal and we
kinda kill the forces of evil, so I can understand the
hate there.  You never interfered with his plans
except when he was all good, and he hated himself then
too, so you'd think he'd be grateful, but no, he has
to make everyone suffer.  He's a prick and that's all
there is to it," she said, her voice hard and
resolved.
"Why do you care if my life is fucked up," he asked,
"I thought you white hats hated me too."
"Well, we did, but we didn't know you very well did
we?  For an evil bloodsucker, you're not half bad,"
she said, with an impish grin.
He grinned back, "For a do gooder who ruins all my
plans, you're not half bad either."
"Are we becoming friends?," Willow asked, trying to
process everything that had happened so far in their
short relationship.
"Yup, that we are, but are you sure you wanna be
friends with the devil?," he asked with a playful
gleam in his blue eyes.
"Sure I'm sure, I dated an internet demon, so why not
buddies with the right hand man of the Scourge of
Europe."
"You dated a demon?"
"Well I didn't know he was a demon at the time.  We
inadvertently released him onto the internet and he
sorta became my internet boyfriend," she said,
blushing slightly.
Willow recounted her short online relationship with
Moloch and had Spike laughing out loud by the end of
the recitation.  It was nice to hear his laugh, and it
made her laugh too.  She couldn't seem to remember why
she was sad when she was around him, and so she ended
up in a detailed story of her life.  He seemed
genuinely interested and that messed with her mind a
little, but she let it slide.  It had been ages since
she had just been able to talk to someone without
feeling self conscious about who and what she was.  He
had known who she was long before she really got to
know him and it wasn't really bothering him now that
they had discovered that they had similar interests.
In fact it seemed to be one of the reasons he liked
her.  He liked her brains and took her for what she
was.  He didn't try to make her into what he wanted
her to be as Xander had always done and for that she
liked him even more.  Though Xander was her
bestfriend, he had a tendency to push her into a mold
that he had forged for her long ago and would wig out
at the slightest step she took away from it.  He had
been allowed to grow and change, but she had to be shy
little Willow the computer nerd forever.  As much as
it pained her, she resented him for restricting any
personal growth that she may have had.  She briefly
wondered how she would have turned out if Spike had
been her lifelong bestfriend, but quickly dismissed
it.  As little as two days ago Spike had been
hankering for her blood making a pretty little mural
on the pavement along with the rest of the scoobies.
This little friendship game was a fluke of nature, one
she enjoyed greatly, but a fluke all the same.
"So, that's what's happened in the last, well,
sixteen years of my life," she said with a smile.
"If Xapper is such a friend, then why did he let you
outside after dark last night?  God only knows what
could have found you," he said, genuine concern
coloring his voice.
"He was too concerned how his new girlfriend would
feel about his hanging out with me.  I really hate
that girl.  She is such a bitch," she snarled,
startling him a little.
"Ooh, I see you really don't like her.  You want me
to make her disapeer?," he asked with a little grin.
"Don't tempt me," she said an answering grin crossing
her face, and then she burst into giggles at the
picture of Spike dragging Cordelia by the hair
somewhere to do away with her.
Spike smiled, liking the little spitfire more and
more as the time passed.  Friends indeed.  He was much
better off with this one on his side.  In fact he felt
rather bad for Angelus or the bitch if they should
catch her in this mood.  Angelus had said the redhead
was a mousy innocent, but the wanker had been dead
wrong, as usual.  She was a stunning little kitten,
with barely sheathed claws.  He smiled a little wider
at the bizarre turn his life had taken as of late.
"So what are you going to do now that you've pissed
off your roomies?," Willow asked, looking at him
again.
"Um, not sure, I kinda need a new place to stay I
think.  Been thinking about getting a new pad anyway.
The only difference was before the bloody poof came
waltzing back in it was gonna be Dru and me.  Now it's
gonna be just me," he said thoughtfully.
"Do you have anywhere to go tonight?," Willow asked,
concernedly.
"Nope, hadn't really thought about it.  I suppose
I'll go rent a hotel room for the time being."
"You can stay here tonight if you want.  It's getting
pretty close to sunrise and I don't want you getting
caught out in it.  That would be no way for our new
freindship to end," she said with a smile.
"You'd really let me crash here?," he asked, shocked.
"Of course, that's what friends are for, isn't it?,"
he grinned.
"Well I guess staying with Willow is a good deal
better than bedding down in some musty old crypt for
the night isn't it?," he said, smiling.
"That it is.  Let me show you to your room," she
said, turning towards the kitchen.
He followed, a little smile on his face.  He couldn't
believe the little chit was letting him stay over,
knowing full well what she did about him.  She just
continued to amaze him.  Yes, he could definately have
done worse in an ally.  The guest room was
conveniently located on the first floor so he could
get to it, and was done up in girly colors.  He gave
her a funny look at the pink bedsheets.
"This was my room when I was ten," she said by way of
explanation.
He smiled and wheeled fully into the room and over to
the bed.  "Thanks for everything, Red.  You're the
best," he said shooting her his best grin.
She blushed lightly and smiled back, "Thanks Spike,
you're not too bad yourself."
She turned and walked out of the room and headed up
the stairs for her own room, the night before still
swirling around her mind.  She couldn't believe there
was a soulless demon sleeping in the guest room
downstairs, and that she really liked him.  He was
sweet and funny and protective.  He gave her a number
of warm fuzzys. <Whoa, down girl.  Spike's jus t your
friend.  C'mon Wills, get a grip, he's a
soulless...gorgeous, incredibly handsome and well
built demon.  You're just lucky he didn't throw you
down and suck all the blood out of your body for
kicks.  Don't go getting a crush on him.> She flopped
down onto her bed and buried her face in her hands.
What was she getting herself into.  She finally fell
asleep, still in the same position thinking over all
that had happened in the past two nights and she was
no closer than she had been last night.
 

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