Water Colored Roses
Author: Midnight Red
Rating: PGish
Classification: Willow/Spike, an  itsy bit of Willow/Angel
Disclaimer: Joss owns all. I'm just playing in his sandbox. Lyrics used belong to Jewel.
Distribution: Whoever has any work of mine. Why they'd want it is beyond me! :) Anyone else that wants it, feel free! But please, drop me a line! *g*
Author's Note: I have no idea what came over me... feedback would be appreciated. (hint, hint!)
Feedback: Please?? Naked Spikey with gooey chocolate to anyone who does. (well... imaginary naked spike!)


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    Everyday, I can feel another bit of my life slipping away. I don't have much time left. That's why I'm writing this down, telling a story that I haven't told a soul in over 60 years.

    I should start at the beginning, my name is Willow Anne Rosenberg. I grew up in a small town called Sunnydale. A one Starbucks town, as a dear friend used to say. I used to be very shy, a wallflower even, but a friendship changed all that. I met Buffy Summers when I was a freshman in high school. Buffy... well, Buffy was nothing if not her own person. She changed my outlook on myself, and those around me. She opened my eyes to the world around me. To the things that lurk in the night. Buffy was one of those people who are, predestined, I guess. But she didn't let that stop her from being who she was, and for many years, she was one of few people I truly looked up to.

    So many people changed my life. Sometimes for the best, and well, sometimes for the worst. My parents, well, they were missing in action, always out of town. Giles changed that, I loved him dearly, and he was the fatherly figure in my life.

Xander was my best friend since early childhood, a bit dense at times, but always there in times of need. His flame was extinguished very early, though, and I still miss him everyday. Oz was my first love, and my first heartbreak. But in time, I learned how to forgive and forget. Even thought I never did see him again, in my heart there will always be a place for him. You learn these things with age, you learn to forgive, to live, and to really love. I know many people would look at me right now and think of me as a lonely, perhaps even sad. I must confess, I live within my memories. Because, once, and just once, I was truly happy. I felt loved, the kind of love that made one weak at the knees.
 

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Oil streaked daisies covered the living room wall
He put water colored roses in her hair
He said, "Love, I love you, I want to give you the mountains, the
sunshine, the sunset too
I want to give you everything as beautiful as you are to me
********

    At a first glance, William may be seem as a hard, callous person, but, underneath all that lurked a passionate, caring man. At first, my friends wouldn't approve our growing friendship. But then, they saw that we truly were happy. By mutual agreement, we took things slowly, as we had both been hurt in the past. We knew each other, inside and out. I loved him dearly, and I guess it showed. He sometimes surprised me with little presents, trinkets even. I still have those with me. And on the 15th of every month he gave a blue rose. It was on that day that we first confessed our love to each other.

Regret. I live with that burden every single day of my life. I regret not loving him sooner. I regret learning about that damned prophecy. I regret going into that building, which started off the chain of events that changed my life, irrevocably. And most of all... I regret losing him.
 

********
Until one day the rain fell as thick as black oil
And in her heart she knew something was wrong
She went running
through the orchard screaming,
'No God, don't take him from me!'
But by the time she got there, she feared he already had gone
She got to where he lay, water colored roses in his hands for her.
********
 

    As usual Spike, Giles, Anya and I, ventured into battle assisting Buffy in the slayage of yet another demon. Unfortunately, this demon wouldn't die like he was supposed to. Everything went up in flames. And it all went downhill from there. Buffy was killed right in front of me. The demon snapped her neck unceremoniously. Later on, I'd find out that Giles and Anya had managed to escape the burning building, but were ambushed outside by a group of vampires.

I was struck from behind.  I felt myself slump towards the floor, my vision swimming crazily. I struggled to remain conscious, but darkness soon overcame my vision. I don't know how long I remained unconscious, but when I came to, everything around me was burning. Thick smoke hung in the air, burning my battered lungs. I felt sluggish, and it was very hard to think, but I knew that I had to get out of there, or burned to a crisp Willow I would be.

Out of nowhere, strong arms encircled me. I knew that embrace. Spike.

     He easily lifted me, and carried me towards safety. The unmistakable smell of burning flesh reached my nose. Was I burning? I didn't know, I couldn't feel anything. To our left, a burning pillar crashed down. And the wavering flames flew even higher. He hurried his pace, he sensed, as I did too, that the building could come crashing down any second now. I tried to speak to him, but my throat felt raw and dry. Miraculously, Spike managed to find an open window, through which he carefully maneuvered us. The fresh air felt blissful against my fevered skin, and was a soothing balm to my battered lungs. My vision still was blurred and shaky, but what I saw outside was unmistakable. Anya and Giles. They had been viciously killed. The work of a cold-hearted bastard. I felt tears well up in my eyes.

      Spike carefully lowered me to the ground. I saw the vampire a split second too late. Spike never stood a chance. He grabbed Spike in a flying tackle, pinning him to the ground. I don't know what happened afterwards, I guess shock overcame me, and unconsciousness yet again claimed my mind.
 

************

    Rescue workers came soon afterwards, and I was taken to a nearby hospital, where I was treated for mild shock, a concussion and first degree burns. But, thankfully, I was alive.

************
 

    To this day I still miss them. Sure, I did meet new people, made new friends, but nobody knew me as they do. That's why I'm writing this. So, that their memory, and the memory of Spike's love will live on.

    Funny thing is, I don't know if Spike did die that night. And no, I'm not being insane. I still get a blue rose on the 15th of every month.
Goddess knows I've looked for him everywhere, even ventured to vampire infested zones. Sometimes, I see a blonde man walking down the street, and my heart soars, thinking it's him. But it never is. But he'll always be within me.

Willow Anne Rosenberg,
July 17, 2060

************

Wiping blood red tears from his eyes, Angel stood in front of Willow's gravestone. He bent down, and placed a blue rose on the fresh mound of dirt. He then turned and vanished in the night.

--End

read the sequal 'Those Who Fall'

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