“Spike!” Willow growled through clenched teeth. Spike just smirked at her. “Yes luv?” Willow sighed dramatically and flopped down on the couch. “Why did I agree to let you stay here again?” Spike sat beside her. “Because you were sick of sharing that dorm room with the soddin’ slayer and wanted my lovely company?” Willow hit him with a pillow. “No, it was because I felt so sorry for you having to put up with Harmony.” Spike grinned and ticked Willow. She started to squirm trying to get away from him. Willow was laughing uncontrollably now, tears down her face. “Spike stop it!” Spike kept tickling her until they both fell on the floor.

Angel walked in and saw them, Spike lying on top of Willow, and Willow with tears down her face. He reacted quickly, throwing Spike into the wall. Spike hit the wall, and slid down it. Angel went to stake him, but Willow grabbed his arm. “Angel don’t!” She went to sit beside Spike. “Spike, are you ok?” Spike went to stand up; he was wobbly, but otherwise fine. Willow was furious. “What the hell were you doing Angel?” Angel stared gaped mouth at Willow. “Willow, I thought he was trying to hurt you.” Willow went and pushed him on to the couch, so she could look down at him. “If Spike was trying to hurt me, don’t you think the implant would have gone off?” Willow had her hands on her hips, gazing at Angel with a fire in her eyes. Spike pulled her onto his lap on the floor. “It’s okay luv, the poof didn’t hit me that hard.”

Willow turned to look at Spike. “You’re sure you’re okay?” Spike smiled and whispered in her ear. Willow giggled. It would be fun to play a trick like
that on Angel. She leaned back and started to kiss down Spike’s neck. “You’re sure baby?” Spike nodded and nibbled on her earlobe. “I’ll be just
fine luv, but you can always kiss me and make it better.” Willow nodded and kissed him. Spike was surprised that she had, he opened his mouth and licked at her lips. Willow opened her mouth to his tongue. Spike held her closer, enjoying the feel of her next to him. Angel just stared slack jawed as the two devoured each other right in front of him.

Willow pulled back to breathe. She was panting in short gasps, that had been the most intense kiss ever. Spike stopped her from moving too much. Willow couldn’t figure out, until she felt why. Spike had a raging hard on. Willow felt tears in her eyes. He had probably been thinking about Druscilla.
Willow knew that any chance of Spike caring for her was non-existent. Willow pulled back, and she stood up. She turned and walked up to her room, closing and locking the door, she sat on her bed and cried. Spike sat there looking stunned. How could the witch just go and leave him like that? She must not give a damn at all.

Angel watched in stunned silence, he could see the pain that had flashed through Spike’s eyes. Spike wanted Willow. “Spike?” Angel looked at his
stunned grand-childe. “What was that?” Spike ran his fingers through his blonde locks. “That was me having a taste of what I can never have.” Angel smirked. “And you can’t have Willow why exactly?” Spike just stared at the stairs Willow had gone up. “Because I can’t.” Spike got up and left Angel sitting in Willow’s living room. He went outside for a smoke.

Angel followed Spike to the doorway. “I came to offer you the chance to come work with me in LA. Any time you decide you want to come, you can. That’s all I have to say.” Angel went and drove off in his convertible. Spike watched him go, than he took his cigarettes out for a smoke, he needed to think.

Spike sat underneath Willow’s balcony. He knew that he could never have Willow, he thought he had been able to tell himself that. But after he had
kissed her. God how he wanted her, he loved her. She must have been so mortified, she had felt how much he wanted her, and than she had run off. He cursed and lit up another cigarette. Why did he have to be so stupid?

Willow stopped crying. She knew that she could never have Spike, he was so out of her league. But when she had felt him touch her, and that kiss. Than she had felt how turned on he was. But it was all for Druscilla, it had to have been. Why else would he have been so happy? He could never want her. She walked outside to stand on her balcony. She leaned on the rail and watched the stars. “How could I have been so stupid? Spike and I should never have kissed.”

Spike nearly swallowed his cigarette. Had Willow just said that? He listened carefully.

Willow saw a falling star. “I wish I may, I wish I might. Have this wish, I wish tonight.” Willow sighed. “I wish that the kiss had never happened.”
Spike laid his head against the wall. He could feel the tears running down his cheeks. She regretted it. The best thing to ever be in his life, and she
didn’t want to be in his life. Spike put out his cigarette. “If Willow doesn’t want me, I don’t want to be here.” Spike went inside the house.

Willow looked at the falling snow. It had just started to snow, and she loved standing in the snow. “I wish Spike loved me.” She whispered softly,
before succumbing to the tears once more. She knew that she loved Spike, but that he would never ever want her. Willow leaned against the balcony rail, sobs racking her body. “I love you Spike.”

Spike had grabbed all of his stuff and shoved it into his car. He had everything ready to go. He turned to look back at the house. He could see
Willow leaning on her balcony. “I love you Willow.” Spike wiped at his bloody eyes. “I’ll always love you Willow.” Than Spike got in his car and
drove away.
 

next