Rating: PG, if that
Summary: Willow and Spike watch each other
Disclaimer: don't own 'em. I only own the plot, as far as I know
AN: This just came to me when I was at a gig. I had been drinking at the time, so that's my excuse. I have read a lot of BtVS fics that are out there, but there are a hell of a lot more that I haven't, so if you've already written something like this, sorry, but I probably haven't read yours.
AN2: This is written from both their points of view.
Feedback: love it! I don't usually write stuff like this, so if its good, bad, ok, I'd love to hear your opinions!
Dedication: To all you nice people out there who reviewed Always And Forever. Thank you!
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Willow
I watched him from across the room. Nobody seemed to notice. They were too involved in their own lives to notice the world around them. But I saw. I saw how their words affected him. How they never realised just how much he did for us. He doesn't have to. Nothing kept him here, helping us. Well, that's what he wants us to think. That he's only here for the blood, or the money. I know differently. I know why he risks his life every time a new danger threatens. He may not have a soul, but he doesn't need one. He has a heart. He wants us to still think he's the "Big Bad" inside, if he only could get the chip out, but he cares too much. More than he should for a vampire at least.
It hurts me, when they insult him, it's almost as if they think he doesn't have any feeling, just because he's a demon. I wish I could tell him that I don't think of him that way. I know he is hurt by what the others say. I wish I could show him how much he means to me, how much I love him, but I cant. Not because of my friends. I don't care what they think. I just don't think I can take the rejection. After Oz, and Tara, I don't want to be hurt again. I love him, but I can never tell him. I've accepted this, and I live with it, no matter how much I wish it wasn't so.
Spike
She's watching me again. She doesn't know that I know. She thinks she's being discrete. Reading what it says on her computer screen, but I know different. Every time we research together, she ends up watching me. I don't mind. I know it upsets her every time one of the morons insults me. Every time the slayer hits me. And I welcome it. Me. The Big Bad. I welcome the care and pity of a mortal. I ask myself why every day, but I already know the answer. I love her, and the secret looks she gives me would make my undead heart miss a beat, if only it could. I wish she would tell me of these feelings I know she has, but she is too shy, too innocent for that, despite the darkness inside her. But that is what draws me to her, her innocence and darkness both. I want her. I know this in my unbeating heart, but I refuse to say this aloud. Maybe one day I will tell her. Until then I'll watch her from afar, as she watches me.
The End