Author’s Email: shopaholicgurl45@yahoo.com
Pairing: W/S, B/S *only in the beginning.. the whole B/S ship is making me SICK!!! I hate it with a passion* A/X, B/F and G/Other
Rating: NC17
Distribution: Like it? Take it- but please tell me where it’s going
Feedback: Don’t make me beg… I dislike begging
Mood Music: Moving On by Good Charlotte, I Miss You by Aaliyah, Baby by Ashanti, Living Dead Girl by Rob Zombie, and Tonight and the Rest of My Life by Nina Gordon
Notes: Ok.. this fic is going to seem a *bit* confusing if you don’t read this.. alright- first off- Spike *never* made that damned Buffybot.. He is *not* in love with her. This is set in S6- no Tara or Dawn. Xander and Anya are still in the planning the wedding phase. I don’t remember if Anya actually knew Faith *as in seen her face to face before* but if she has then in this story she hasn’t- Ok.. the whole Faith business.. she never killed anybody and she didn’t help out the mayor in the ascension thing.. what she *did* do is switch bodies with Buffy but she *didn’t* sleep with Riley during that time. Basically after that she just abandoned her slaying duties. I really don’t watch Angel so I’m not sure if his soul is permanent as of now but if it isn’t then it is now- A bit AU
Notes2: I changed the lyrics just a *tad* bit to Baby so it would make sense and fit the story more- If you’re curious to what Willow and Janelle were talking about go to http://babelfish.altavista.com/babelfish/tr to find out!
Spoilers: End of S5 and a bit of S6
Summary: Willow goes through trials in her life and in the end discovers the one thing everyone wants, true love.
Disclaimer: Joss & Company owns all.. *pouts* wouldn’t mind owning Spike though- naughty thoughts come to mind.. lol- Good Charlotte owns Moving On, Aaliyah *may she RIP* owns I Miss You, Ashanti owns Baby, Rob Zombie owns Living Dead Girl, Nina Gordon owns Tonight and the Rest of My Life, and quote belongs to Moulin Rouge
Status: Complete
** indicates emphasis
<> indicates thought
Italics indicates lyrics
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
~Part 1~ Forgive and Forget
~^~**~^~
"You’re kidding me"
"Yes and I would joke about this why?"
"But.. it’s Spike"
"Point being?"
"Why would you ever find him.. worthy?"
"Ok, to borrow Queen C’s term here- harsh much? You judge too quickly Buff, I mean at first he seems like a complete ass- not that I blame him cuz it makes complete sense when you think about it- the one thing that he enjoyed most and was his source of living.. err.. sorta.. whatever.. not my point- anyways it’s taken away from him and *then* he has to seek help from his most hated enemy, no offense- of course he’s going to have pent up anger. If he didn’t- I’d be kinda worried. My main point is that when you get past the surface and his violent tendencies that he really is a nice guy, don’t tell him I said
that though because he’ll probably figure a way around that chip to hurt me if he ever found out that I called him nice. Honestly, he’s extremely witty and not always in a sarcastic way and he can keep up an intelligent conversation. If you ever gave him a chance Buff, he’s really not that bad."
Willow sat back against the pillows with a satisfied look upon her face, <ha ha! top that!> The girls were having their monthly "girls night out" except they decided to skip the whole going out thing and just headed straight for the sleepover part. Both were overly exerted from the week’s doings and so relaxation was key. Willow watched Buffy with an amused expression upon her face. The Slayer was still trying to figure out what to say in response. She reached over and grabbed the bowl of popcorn that was amongst the scattered nail polishes on the floor.
The slayer opted for just simply rolling her eyes, "Why exactly are you so willing to stand up for the bleached wonder anyhow?" she leaned over and grabbed a handful of popcorn from Willow’s lap.
"Ummm.. I just think it’s really unfair the way everybody treats him" Willow looked down, trying to hide her blush. <why do I *always* blush when I think about him? grr.. why does he have to be so yummy? Those eyes- those cheekbones- that ass- NO! Bad Willow- Buffy is *right* there.. no thinking bout *any* body parts on Spike.. oohh.. but he does have some *really* nice body parts- WAIT- NO!>
"Willow.. what are you not telling me?" Buffy looked at her best friend who at the moment was paying an awful lot of attention to the carpet instead of at her.
"Nothing.. it’s nothing"
"Rosenberg- you better spit it out soon or else I’m gonna have to smack it out of you" Buffy threatened and held her pillow up to prove her point.
Willow let out a sigh and held up her hands in defeat, "Alright.. alright! I kinda umm.. likehimalot"
"YOU WHAT?!" Despite the fact Willow mumbled the last part, Buffy with her slayer hearing heard every word, loud and clear. She was *hoping* to the gods above that she heard wrong because if she didn’t then she was in trouble, *major* trouble.
"I like him" <that’s a bit of an understatement.. love is more like it>
"You wha- You like him? How? When? Why?"
"Yes Buffy, I do. He’s sweet and really nice and he listens to me Buff. He doesn’t judge and he accepts who I am"
"You know you have regular, living friends for that"
Willow looked at Buffy with sad eyes, "Do I Buffy? This is the first time this month that you have actually talked to me, as in *really* talked to me. And Xander, he’s busy with Anya, with the planning of the wedding and what not. Giles, well I can’t exactly talk to Giles about my personal issues. The only one that I’ve actually conversed with in a more serious manner is Spike."
Buffy sat, stunned and regretful. <So, this is how I treat my best friend? Well, it’s not that surprising considering how I treat Spike like he’s some kind of sex toy.. maybe I should tell her.. tell her *everything*> "I’m sorry Will. I’ll make it up to you, if you’ll let me." Buffy looked up with hopeful eyes.
"Yeah, I think I’d like that" Willow smiled a warm smile as tears started to slip out of her eyes.
Buffy crawled over and enveloped her in a tight hug, as if telling her that everything would be alright now. <I can’t tell her now, she just forgave me.. besides last night was the *last* time I would go to him.. no point in breaking her heart for no reason- I wouldn’t, no, I *won’t* go to him again, I *won’t*>
~^~**~^~
Spike sat up when he heard the door to his crypt slam. He ears perked up when he heard his name being shouted out by the Slayer. He leaned back against the headboard, waiting to see what she would do. Buffy bounded down Spike’s steps and stood at the foot of the bed, watching him, her eyes showing shame.
"Back so soon Slayer? Thought last night was the *last* time" Spike taunted, enjoying her uncomfortable stature.
"Shut up Spike" Buffy snapped. <Ok, you can do this- just tell him it’s over and then everything will be O.K> She walked over to where he was sitting, full and ready to tell him that it was over, among other things. <maybe it won’t hurt if I did it one *last* time> With that decided, Buffy grabbed his face and brought his lips to hers in a bruising kiss. She quickly divested both their bodies of clothing and moved onto the bed to straddle him. She pulled back and looked into his eyes, feeling a bit guilty, <why does it feel like I’m betraying her?>, "I swear this is the *last* time" and with that said, she plunged down on his member and closed her eyes, enjoying the feel of his cock fully embedded within her.
<Why do I let her use me like this? Well, can’t exactly be hypocritical there when I use her myself.. All I have to do is tell Red how I feel bout her and all this could change. *She* could be riding me right now instead of the Slayer.> Spike looked at the bouncing blonde in disgust. He hated the fact that every time they fucked he had to close his eyes and imagine that the hair he was running his hands through was red instead of blonde, that the eyes he looked into were green instead of hazel, that he could be making love to the one he *loved* instead of joining in this act of two bodies simply using each other. He opened his eyes to see Buffy still bouncing on his cock, her eyes closed, she no doubt thinking of someone else also. He was about to close eyes again when he heard a surprised gasp, he looked passed the slayer and his eyes locked with another’s, a set of green ones that had haunted his dreams for too long. <fuck.. fuck.. *fuck*> Spike pushed Buffy off of him and she yelped with surprise, "What the hell Spike! I wasn’t *done*"
Spike was paying little attention to her. He rushed off the bed to slip into his jeans and shirt and ran up the stairs, hoping to catch up to the redhead to explain. Buffy turned around in confusion and in time to see a flash of red hair, she rested her forehead against the headboard <shit! you fucked up this time Summers, you fucked up badly>
~^~**~^~
Willow ran out of his crypt in record time and into the open, she looked up at the sky, finding some comfort in it. The sun had set only a few moments ago and there were still a few light pinks and purples in the sky. Her vision was soon blurred with the tears that were now flowing freely down her cheeks. She halted her steps and stood in the middle of the cemetery, frozen. Everything was now rushing back to her. She had finally gotten the guts up to tell Spike how she felt. Somehow after the conversation with Buffy the night before she had realized that if she didn’t tell him soon about how she felt then she would lose him, <looks like I already did> She was beginning to feel a bit faint and after a few moments of being in a daze she collapsed, into strong arms.
"I’m sorry luv, so sorry." Spike repeated it over and over again, his brain unable to function and come up with something new. He simply wrapped his arms around her and rocked her back and forth, trying to give her some comfort and ease her pain. <looks like she *does* feel the same way I do, or did at least>
Willow finally calmed herself down and lifted her head to look around. She noticed that she was held against a body, a very hard and *male* body. She looked up into the piercing gaze of ice blue eyes, <Spike> She pushed herself away from him and then composed herself before looking up again.
"You need to hear me out Red, let me explain"
"Ex-Explain what?" Willow mentally cursed herself for her stutter, <now is *not* the time to crack>
"Everything"
"It’s ok Spike, I understand" <I know why you picked Buffy, they all pick Buffy. Apparently I’m never good enough>
"No, you don’t. I love you Willow"
Willow broke the eye contact and looked away <Why did he have to lie and say that?>
Spike looked at her shaking body. They had been in the cemetery for quite awhile now and it was getting cold. He walked over and wrapped his arms around her, "Why don’t I walk you home and then we can talk"
"Ok" she was too tired to disagree, emotionally, physically and mentally.
~^~**~^~
"So, explain" Willow sat on the couch, her knees drawn up so she could rest her chin against them. She wrapped her arms around her legs and waited for Spike’s answer.
"The Slayer and I are not in a relationship, it’s purely physical. I still bloody hate her and vice versa."
"How long?" The words were almost a whisper. She moved so her forehead was resting against her kneecaps. <So they just use each other for sex?>
"It’s been going on for about a month now, starting right after she.. came back."
"Why?"
"I don’t bloody know." Spike sat back in the seat and ran his fingers through his hair, <*why* did you do it mate? do you even know?>
<why did he say he loved me though? Is he just trying to make me feel better in a twisted way of some sort? *shit* did I just say that out loud?> Willow looked up and the pairs of eyes locked.
Spike’s lips turned up in a small smile, "Yeah you did. I *do* love you Willow. Every time I was with her I was wishing it was you. I cursed myself everyday for not having the bloody balls to tell you."
"O-kay.." <he loves me but he was too afraid to tell me so he used Buffy as a means of releasing his sexual frustration? When did this whole thing become like an episode of some cheesy soap opera?>
"I’m sorry Red, I never meant to hurt you" <bloody hell, you’re turning into a bloody ponce, acting all poofy.> Spike’s smile grew at the next thought <but she’s worth it> At getting no reply Spike continued on, "Do you have any feelings of any sort toward me?"
Willow let out a big sigh, "I do." Spike’s face lit up with these words. "But I need time to.. deal"
He nodded, fully understanding, "take as much time as you need pet" <I’ll wait an eternity if I have to.. bloody hell I *am* turning into a poof>
After a few more moments of sitting in silence, Spike finally got up to leave. Before shutting the door Willow leaned forward and gave Spike a gentle but insistent kiss, "I love you Spike" And with that she shut the door on the bewildered vampire and got ready for bed.
~^~**~^~
"Willow?"
She looked up to see Buffy hovering over her, with a sad smile on her face. "hey Buffy"
"Can.. Can we talk?"
"umm.. sure sit down" Willow patted the ground next to her as she leaned against the tree. She looked off into the sky, hoping to clear up her mind for the conversation that she had been dreading. After Spike left last night she had got herself into bed but sleep was the last thing she did. She ended up tossing and turning throughout the night, seeing the whole scene playing out in front of her, over and over. Willow snapped back to reality with the sound of Buffy’s voice.
"I’m sorry Will. I really am. God, I can’t believe I screwed up again. I don’t even deserve to ask this but will you forgive me? I know I don’t deserve it but I can’t lose you Will, I just can’t. You really are my life line nowadays. Even though I don’t show it- I need you.. you’re my best friend"
Willow turned her head and took a long look at the now weeping blonde, she felt a tinge in her heart but pressed on, knowing that she *had* to ask this next question. "Why’d you do it? I mean even *after* I told you how I felt."
"I-I.. don’t know. I just needed to *feel* and I don’t know Will. It’s complicated" Buffy wiped the tears off her face with the back of her hand and looked up into the blue sky.
"Well, explain cuz I have time" <you’re not gonna get out of this *that* easily>
Buffy turned towards the redhead and began quietly, "When I first got back everything just seemed lost to me. I felt like punishing myself for some really twisted up reason, thinking I didn’t deserve all this.. that I don’t deserve you.. which I don’t," she let out a sigh before continuing on, "I don’t deserve friends that were willing to do the most drastic things just to make sure I wasn’t suffering. So I wanted to punish myself and somehow Spike got thrown into this. We started fucking, I know it sounds crude but seriously- it wasn’t making love, it wasn’t even having sex. It was just two bodies using each other with no *real* feelings. Yesterday, I don’t know why I did it again. I originally went to him to tell him that it was over, that I didn’t want to risk our friendship for a quick fuck but I don’t know.. something just happened and well… you know the rest."
"Are you mad at me?" she asked in a small voice.
"No" Willow sighed and wrung her hands together, "but I’m not sure I can forgive you just yet. I think I need some time to deal with all this. Spike says he loves me and I truly think he does so please don’t hurt him when I leave."
"You’re leaving?"
"I need some time away from all this- just some time for *me*. I’ll come back, I promise but I just need time to gather my thoughts. Promise me though, promise me you won’t hurt him"
Buffy looked at her best friend, eyes filled with hurt, "I promise" After a long pause she asked quietly, "Do you love him?"
"Yeah, I really think I do," she said through tears, "despite my knowing better" she added with a small laugh. "Be happy Buffy, you shouldn’t punish yourself. I love you and you will always be my best friend but right now I just need to focus on me." Willow leaned over and enveloped the blonde in a tight hug, "Best friends forever remember?"
"Yeah, best friends forever." Buffy returned the hug, silently thanking all the gods above for blessing her with a friend like Willow.
~^~**~^~
"You’re really going back?"
Willow smiled at the skeptical tone, "Yeah, I’m really going back."
"Why? You’re happy here. You have a good job, great friends, like yours truly and a kick ass apartment! Do you know how much it costs these days to get an apartment this good?"
"I have to go back. I’ve put it off for too long now. It’s already been over a year."
"Exactly, so why not make it longer- a few more years. Is it really that much of a difference?"
"Faith, I’m going back ok! We’ve had this conversation already!"
The brunette looked at the redhead that she had been able to call a friend for the past year with worried eyes. She hated what Buffy and Spike did to her <not that I can really talk.. considering all that I did.. yeah let’s not get into that> The two had met up in Chicago and soon became good friends. Willow was willing to put the past behind them but now it seemed she was going back on her word. She was going back to her past, Sunnydale. "I just don’t want them to hurt you again."
"I won’t let them" Willow looked at the pouting slayer and sat down next to her on the couch and wrapped an arm around her, "Don’t be worried hun, I’m gonna be fine"
"Can I come with?"
"I thought you’d never ask"
Faith raised an eyebrow, "You planned this didn’t you?"
"I have no idea *what* you’re talking about. What is this planning you speak of?" Willow asked in a mock shocked tone.
"I should smack you for that!"
"Stop pouting, get packing and afterwards I’ll voluntarily hold out my arm *for* you to slap me"
"I’m gonna hold you to that!"
~^~**~^~
Willow stood outside Giles’s apartment, wringing her hands <why am I so nervous? It’s ok.. everything will be ok- right?>
As if reading her thoughts Faith put a reassuring hand on the redhead’s shoulder, "It’s gonna be fine, I’m right here if you need support"
"Yeah.. yeah.. everything’s gonna be ok" Willow said in a confident tone, nodding her head up and down trying to convince herself.
"Alright, now that we’ve got *that* settled, you plan on ringing the doorbell anytime soon?"
"umm.. right- ringing doorbell.. I should do that shouldn’t I?" Willow lifted a shaking finger up to the white button and pressed, listening to the sound it made and then stood, shifting her weight from one foot to the other, waiting for someone to answer the door. <you can do this Will, you can do this!> She came out of her thoughts when the door opened and the whole Scooby Gang came into view.
"hey guys"
~^~**~^~
Anya was the first to react, they had all been expecting her but seeing her for the first time had put them all into a temporary shock. "Willow! You’re back!" The short blonde grabbed the redhead in a tight embrace.
"Oof.. hey Anya"
Anya dragged her in and the others parted to make way, "ooh your friend can come in too"
Willow stood in the center of the room, feeling just a *tad* bit uncomfortable, she never did like being the center of attention. "hey everyone"
Buffy snapped out of her shock and ran up to her best friend and gave her a tight hug, "Will! You’re back! I missed you *so* much! I’m sorry, so sorry" She was soon joined by Xander who hugged both up them, "I’m glad you’re back Willster. It wasn’t the same without you" Anya stood by Giles, feeling a bit left out, "hey!" she ran up to the trio and hugged them all, "me too!"
Faith looked at the scene before her with amusement, she couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle. Buffy turned around and saw her ex-nemesis, "Faith" She walked up to the brunette slayer and gave her a small hug.
"Missed you too B, seriously here"
"Welcome back" Giles said after he let go of Willow. <Only one more person.. err.. vamp left>
She turned around to see ice blue eyes, staring at her intently, waiting for her to make a move. She walked slowly up to him and all time seemed to stop, the only thing that mattered now was her and the vampire in front of her. "I missed you" she said softly before wrapping her arms around his neck.
Spike savored her warmth and returned her hug by wrapping his arms around her waist, tightly. "I missed you too Red"
Willow pulled back and kissed him softly on the lips, a kiss filled with promise. "I love you Spike"
He stood there, dazed. <Too many emotions. Can vampires even feel this much? Do I still love her? *Can* I even love anymore?> He opened his mouth to say something but she shushed him by placing a finger on his lips, her eyes telling him that everything would be ok and that she would be willing to wait.
Buffy cleared her throat, "Sorry to break up this lil’ ol’ reunion here but umm.. we were planning on going Bronzin’ tonight- you guys in? It’ll give us time to catch up and what not."
Willow glanced at Faith, the grin on the brunette’s face gave her the answer she needed, "we’re in"
~^~**~^~
"Wow has this place changed, they’re actually playin some good stuff." As soon as the words tumbled out of Faith’s mouth she started yelling out, "Holy shit! This is my *favorite* song- you’re dancing with me Red" her tone leaving no room for argument.
When I think about my life
I wonder if I will survive
To live to see in 25 or will I just fall?
I call my friends, they just keep dying.
People round me, always crying.
In this place that I like to call my home.
Not everyone knows, but everybody goes to a better place.
Not everybody knows that everyone could be living their last days
But the hard times will come, and we'll keep moving on.
We're moving on.
Keep moving on.
Willow laughed out loud as she saw Faith belt out the song at the top of her lungs as she bobbed her head to the tune. She couldn’t help but dance and sing along and apparently neither could the rest of the group. Willow turned to see Buffy dance right next to her, also lost in the music. Xander and Anya seemed to be dancing to their own music altogether. <something’s missing> As if reading her thoughts she felt strong arms encircle her waist. She leaned back against Spike’s chest and listened to him sing along to the lyrics.
Life. Hope. Truth. Trust. Faith. Pride. Love. Lust.
All make up the things we've lost but things we've gained we'll take with us.
And I'm so proud of these two hands
To make myself a better man
I wonder if I'll ever see the end of this.
With all this rain it just keeps fallin
On my head and now I'm calling
Out to someone else to help me
Make it through.
Willow smiled as she heard the lyrics come out of the system and Spike’s mouth, <he has such a sexy voice> She unconsciously let out a sigh and then turned around to face him "I’ll help you make it through- I promise. I came back and I’m here to stay"
"I know luv, I know" Spike rested his chin on the top of her head as they swayed slowly to the music.
Willow’s ears perked up as she heard the DJ speak up, "Alright alright- all you girls out there have been buggin me bout not playin any slow songs so you know what- tonight’s 2 in a row is dedicated especially to the couples out there"
It’s been too long and I’m lost without you
So what am I gonna do, said I’ve been needin’ you,
wantin’ you
Wonderin’ if you’re the same and who’s been with you
Is your heart still mine, I wanna cry sometimes
I miss you
Now you’re gone and I’m lost without you here now
But I know I gotta live and make it somehow
Come back to me
Can you feel me
Hear me callin’ for you
It’s been too long and I’m lost without you
So what am I gonna do, said I’ve been needin’ you,
wantin’ you
Wonderin’ if you’re the same and who’s been with you
Is your heart still mine, I wanna cry sometimes
Now I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ ‘bout you
And the days we used to share
It’s drivin’ me crazy, I don’t know what to do
I’m just wonderin’ if you still care
Willow let out a small chuckle, <they really know how to pick ‘em.. right on the dot for how I’ve been feeling for the past year> She gathered up her courage and sang softly in time with the song, "Is your heart still mine?"
Spike froze. He looked down at her, she was glowing- she always had this natural radiance about her. Her green eyes were sparkling but tinged with something, fear. He leaned forward and their lips met in a slow but passionate kiss. Their pent up emotions finally released. At that moment, he knew, he loved her and he always would- the emotions he was feeling now, they were eternal. "Always luv, and it always will be"
I don't remember feeling like this...
Baby...Baby I love you...Baby...Baby I love you
I got this jones forming in my bones (from a man)
who indeed took over my soul, (understand)
get on my knees till they bloody red, (baby please)
see I don't know if you get it yet, (just don't know)
He's like the lighter to my cigarette,
(watch me smoke), I never knew another life
(didn't know) can have the power to take over mine,
So baby baby.
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby,(baby I love you) baby,
baby,baby baby,baby, I love it when I hear
ya name, got me sayin' baby, baby, baby,
baby, baby,(baby I love you) baby, baby, baby, baby,
baby.
See, I could never feel alone with you (in my life),
I gave up everything I own for you (won't
think twice), almost a shame how I'm mesmerized (such
a shame),
I loose my thought looking in your eyes (I know why)
because your kisses make my lips quiver and (that's
real) and when you
touch me my whole body shivers. (I can feel) now,
I can see how another life(nother life) you
have the power to take over mine cause you’re my baby.
you don't know what you've done to me, (done to me)
I never thought
I'd need you desperately,(desperately) it's kind
of sick how I'm stuck on you(stuck on you)
but I don't care cause I'm needing you (I'm needing
you)
and how I feel will remain the same (remains the same)
cause you're my baby, (cause your my baby)
listen and when the world starts to stress me out,
(where I run) it's to you boy without
a doubt (you're the one) who keeps me sane and I can't
complain
(can't complain) you're like a
drug you relieve my pain (may seem strange)
you're like the blood flowing through my vain, (oooo)
keeps me alive and feeding my brain,
(oooo) now this is how another life (nother life)
could
have the power to take over mine cause you’re my baby.
~Part 2~ Eternity
~^~**~^~
3 years later
"Oh, hell no!"
Willow shot a glare at the bleached blonde vampire. He lifted his head, an innocent look upon his face, "What? I did *nothing*!"
"Bullshit! You cheated!"
"Look ducks, just because you can’t play cards does *not* mean I cheated!"
She sat back in her seat with a pout, "hmphh."
Spike grinned as he got up from his seat and went over to her, "I’m sorry pet, if you want I’ll purposely lose the next round for ya"
"I’m not amused"
He leaned forward and caught her lower lip and started sucking. Willow grabbed his head and pulled him in for a more intense kiss.
"Ok, you two- break it up! I don’t need to see that!" Buffy stood above them, <Why do I always pick the *worst* times to walk in on them?>
Willow pulled away from Spike’s lips and turned her head up to face Buffy, "Yeah?"
"You and Spike busy tonight? Me and Faith got extra tickets to the opening of that new club.. what’s it called? Umm.. Poison- yeah that’s it! Interested?"
"Yeah sure, how’d you get tickets to Poison? I heard it was almost impossible to get them!"
"Faith’s got connections, besides she wanted to make tonight extra special."
"You guys celebrating something tonight?"
"You really want to know? It’s kinda kinky"
"Ok ok! Stop *right* there! Don’t want to know *anything* else!" Willow held up her hands to stop further details.
"You’re too easy luv, the Slayer’s just teasing you, it’s probably nothing, just some anniversary or something"
"No, seriously- It really *is* kinda kinky"
"Really now?" Spike raised an eyebrow, his curiosity struck.
"Don’t you even think it buddy!" Willow warned before smacking him playfully across the chest.
"What! I wasn’t thinking nothing, what is it with chits and the slapping anyway?" Spike complained jokingly as he rubbed his chest.
Willow ignored his inquiring question, "So- 7?"
"Yup!" Buffy then turned and walked out of the room with a slight bounce to her step. Giles had returned to England soon after Willow’s return. He had resumed his job with the Council and had just gotten married a little over a month ago. Xander and Anya had moved to the suburbs of Southern California after Anya had gotten pregnant. They didn’t want to raise their children on the Hellmouth and had been living happily in the city of Irvine for a little over 2 years now. The rest of the remaining group had moved to New York after Buffy and Faith retired officially from slaying. The four of them had been living together ever since Faith and Willow came back. After a few weeks Faith and Buffy had really bonded and Buffy realized the truth to why she could never make it worth with a guy, it was because she was gay. Faith had been with her every step of the way after she made this discovery. She had personally known it from the beginning but didn’t want to shock the blonde. The two had grown even closer after Buffy had come out and announced it to everybody and the two had been in a relationship for close to 1 ½ years now. Spike and Willow were still together, and going strong. It was like they completed each other, they truly were each other’s other half. It was nearing Willow’s 25th birthday and the next big obstacle was coming up in their relationship, the decision as to whether or not she *truly* wanted to spend eternity with him.
~^~**~^~
"So this is Poison?" Willow asked as she leaned further into Spike’s embrace. The bleached blonde had his right arm wrapped around the redhead’s waist, tightly not to mention. Willow’s green orbs scanned the club <wow> The club seem to have an air that said, "naughty naughty" In the front of the club there were only neutral colors but as you walked further in the beiges and tans faded into darker colors altogether. The design had an overall futuristic basis but there were still touches of Victorian style. When the two couples finally reached the main area, two jaws dropped while the other two sat back smirking. Willow grew wide eyed as she viewed the sight before her, there were 5 dance floors altogether; One large one that was in the center and four others that were placed at each corner. Each was shaped in a square. The four smaller floors were placed firmly on the ground but the middle one was held up in mid-air by four large steel bars. It was at least 20 feet above ground and as the two best friends looked on, they both noticed that the middle dance floor was actually a glass box. After getting over their initial awe of the area the four got a seat and ordered their drinks.
"You like?" Faith asked as she waved an arm toward the dance floors.
"Hell fuckin yeah!" Buffy answered with a large smile. "Screw waiting for the drinks, we’re dancing" And with that said the blonde led the unresisting brunette up the stairs to reach the main dance floor.
Willow leaned against the table and took a sip out of her Fuzzy Navel.
Who is this irresistible creature who has an insatiable love for the dead?
Living dead girl
What are you thinking about?
What are you thinking about?
Her ears perked up when she heard the first notes to the new song. She almost spewed her drink when she heard the first line. "We are dancing to this!" She dragged Spike onto the floor and up the steps that Buffy and Faith took only a few minutes before.
crawl on me
sink into me
die for me
living dead girl
"never heard of Rob Zombie, luv?"
"not really.. my musical knowledge has been pretty limited"
What are you thinking about?
What are you thinking about?
goldfoot machine
creates another fiend
so beautiful
they make you kill
"Like it?"
Willow leaned back against Spike as he put his hands on her hips. She pushed back against Spike’s growing erection, "What do you think?"
"Careful pet, you push any farther and I’m going to have to shag you in front of all these people."
crawl on me
sink into me
die for me
living dead girl
Willow turned around and leaned up to his ear. She nipped at his left ear lobe before whispering, "How bout the alley?"
~^~**~^~
Willow pushed Spike against the wall and kissed him, hard. She had gotten all worked up <you have yourself to thank for that Rosenberg> and she needed him.. now! Spike took control over the kiss and soon the whole situation too. He turned them and pushed her up the wall, lifted her skirt and ripped off her panties while she unzipped his jeans. She grabbed his cock and began to stroke, readying him.
"Better stop that luv, I wanna cum in you" his voice husky from lust.
"hmm.. Spike.. I’m so ready.. I want you inside me.. be in me"
Spike leaned down to give her a soft kiss that contradicted his other actions. He positioned himself and with one powerful thrust, he completely embedded himself within her. Willow wrapped her legs around his waist while he had one hand on her hips, guiding the movements, and the other in a fist, pushing against the wall. Their movements became more frenzied as both were eager for release. Spike nuzzled her neck and he pierced her tender flesh, he sucked hungrily, drawing out her sweet elixir. Willow came with a silent scream, her head thrown back against the wall. Her muscles clamped down on his cock and he soon joined her in release with a growl against her neck. When she finally came down from her intense orgasm she felt Spike licking the wounds. She let out a small chuckle when she heard him purr.
"What?"
"You’re purring"
"I’m happy" He leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on her lips and then pulled out of her, against her muscle’s protests.
"I don’t how I’m gonna walk all the way to the car." she whined and then gave him a playful slap across the chest, "Why’d you let me cum that hard?"
"Who was the one that suggested this whole thing?"
"I- uh.. urgghhh.. stupid vampire"
"Don’t worry luv, I’ll carry you" Before she could protest, she found herself wrapped up in Spike’s arms.
"Knew there was a reason why I kept you around"
"Hey!"
"Teasing Spike, I love you" She raised her hand to caress his cheek.
"Love you too Red"
~^~**~^~
He looked at her, watching her sleep. She looked so peaceful, content, and angelic. He silently thanked the powers above for blessing him with her love. He would do anything for her, he knew it and accepted it. The idea of love was no longer frightening to him, it had been before. He had been used and emotionally abused by those he trusted in the past but somehow the mortal using him as a pillow at the moment changed all that. He never wanted to lose her, he truly did want to spend an eternity with her. <but you don’t know how she feels bout it> The thought had been in the back of his mind for the past couple of weeks. She was going to be 25 in less then 2 weeks, the perfect age for her to be turned. He had no idea how to broach the subject though. He couldn’t exactly just come out and flat out tell her, no, he had to approach the subject on a more subtle level. That way it was a better chance of her to agree to it, she had to agree to it, she just *had* to. If she didn’t, <let’s not even go there mate.> He had already had a chat with the two slayers about the issue and surprisingly enough they had been very helpful. Buffy didn’t even blink when Spike told her that he wanted to turn her best friend, she knew it was coming and was actually surprised he didn’t ask her earlier. She had only one condition, that Willow kept her soul. Faith had discovered a similar curse to the one Angel was cursed with previously, except this curse didn’t have a clause. Everything was all set up, now all he needed was for her to agree to it. <Does she love me enough though? Would she be willing to give up sunlight and kids for me? Would she die for me?> He pushed away the sad thoughts that were plaguing his mind and reveled in the feel of her soft body against his.
~^~**~^~
"Where the hell were you guys yesterday?"
"What do you mean?"
"We were all dancing and then all of a sudden *BAM*" Buffy raised her fists and the opened them, stretching her fingers, "you guys were gone"
"Oh.. that" Willow brought her hamburger up to her face, hoping that it would hide her blush.
"Yeah *that*" <ahh.. it all makes sense now> Buffy smiled evilly as she pressed on, "Something you wanna tell me?"
"No"
"Oh come on! I give *you* details!"
"hey! it’s not like I *ask* for details when you give them to me- in fact half the time I *don’t* want to know and you tell me anyway!"
Buffy pouted, "Come on, if you guys were so worked up that you had to leave a club like Poison, then it had to be good." She looked over at the redhead who was now blushing furiously and took pity on her, "alright alright- will you at least give me the Cliff notes version?"
"Tell me again why I hang out with you"
"Because you love me now stop stalling- I want details" Buffy held up a French fry and pointed it towards Willow, as if threatening her.
Willow finally gave in and told Buffy a brief overview of what had happened when they went out into the alley. When she was done Buffy was still pouting, "Geez when I said Cliff notes version I didn’t actually mean it"
"hey- at least I told you something didn’t I?"
"Well, the parts you told me I could’ve guessed on my own, I want details dammit!! It’s a right of a best friend to get details!"
"You’re hopeless" Willow let out a sigh, "Alright alright, you want details- fine- I’ll give you details"
"That’s what I thought!" Buffy scooted over and gave Willow a small hug, "Now get on with it!"
~^~**~^~
"How was lunch luv?"
"Buffy kept hounding me for details of our "disappearance"" she used her fingers to do air quotes, "last night.. spent half the time trying to ward her off.. didn’t work out that well"
"nosy bitch" Spike said in a joking tone, he was actually friends with both slayers nowadays but when the time presented itself, they still took jabs at each other.
"How has your day been so far?"
"Just got better" Spike pulled her into his arms and leaned down to give her a kiss.
"I take it you missed me"
"hmm.. terribly" Spike began to nuzzle her neck.
"Stop that" though she made no move to push him away, "Faith and Buffy are right in the next room" she said in a warning tone.
The mention of the Slayers brought Spike out of his lust-filled daze, <you gotta talk to her bout it>
"Bloody hell, ruin the moment why don’t you?"
"I’ll make it up to you later" she promised and then reached down to give his ass a squeeze.
Spike raised an eyebrow before reverting his thoughts to the situation at hand, "I think we need to talk about something luv"
"What?"
"Sit down pet, this may take awhile"
"Spike, what is it? You’re starting to worry me a bit"
Spike gestured towards the table and chairs in the corner of their room and they both sat down, "Your birthday is coming up soon and there’s some.. decisions that you need to make" He looked up and his eyes met the confused gaze of the woman he loved.
"What do you mean?"
He let out an unneeded sigh and decided to try a different approach, "Do you love me?"
"Of course I do, I always will" she answered automatically.
"Always, do you mean that literally luv?"
Suddenly it clicked. Willow looked at the blonde vampire, he was fidgeting, <is he nervous? wow.. I can make the big bad nervous!> she smiled softly before meeting his eyes, "Yes"
~^~**~^~
"Something wrong Blondie?" Faith plopped down on the couch and stared at the vampire across from her, waiting for an answer. Buffy had taken Willow out on a full expenses paid shopping spree, compliments of the two Slayers, leaving the other two alone.
Spike looked up, surprised to see the brunette slayer there <she wasn’t there a minute ago> "Where in the bleedin hell did you come from?"
She pointed towards the kitchen, "Wow are you out of it!" she scooted closer to him, "What’s wrong?"
"Nothing’s wrong, I’m just thinking"
"See, you thinking is wrong altogether. You never did strike me as the type that thought before they acted"
"I’m not amused Slayer"
"Alright- I’ll stop teasing. You know, it always helps if you talk about the stuff that’s bothering you"
"Thanks for the advice," he said dryly, he forced out a sigh before continuing on, "I was just thinking bout Red."
"I figured, what about her?"
"If she knows the consequences of her decision"
"What do you mean by that?"
"I don’t want her to regret the choice she’s going to make"
"Ok, who are you and what have you done with Spike?" Faith leaned over and slapped him upside the head, "Look, Willow’s a big girl, she’s smart, clever, witty and a whole bunch of other good stuff that I’m not going to get into. Do you think she’d make a life-altering decision like this without even thinking over all the aspects of it?" She stood up and began pacing, obviously getting into it, "She loves you Spike, she really, truly does. Don’t throw that love away because you’re unsure of yourself. I’m beginning to miss the evil and sadistical bastard that you were when I first met you"
Spike looked up and met her teasing chocolate eyes, "Three years with Red will change you"
"Wow, whoever thought William the Bloody would ever admit that he’s…" she dragged out the sentence to further prove her point, "*whipped*" her voice raised a bit higher as she said the last word.
"Hey now! I’m not whipped you bloody bint!"
"Alright then stop acting like such a *poof*" smiling as she stole his word, "and start getting ready for this spell. After all, today is her birthday!" With that, she turned her heel and began to walk out of the room, she reached the door when she heard Spike call her name, her real name.
"Faith?"
"Yeah Blondie?"
"Thanks"
"No prob"
~^~**~^~
"My feet hurt!" Willow whined as she fell onto the couch. She glared up at Buffy, "Can’t believe you dragged me around the mall for *five* hours!"
"hey! the whole trip was to buy *you* presents and if you really wanted to stop that much you should’ve told me!"
"I *did* but it was always, "but Will- just one more store" she mocked, complete with hand movements.
"To buy *you* *more* clothes! An-" Buffy’s response was cut off by Spike coming into the room.
"What are you two chits arguing about?"
"Buffy put me through cruel and unusual torture!!! I can’t even move now, can you slap her for me Spike?" She looked up at him, using her world famous puppy eyes.
"I don’t want to get staked luv, but I *will* get rid of your aching feet problem" He grabbed her left foot and began to massage it.
"hmm.. that feels *so* good, thank you honey" she said sweetly.
"Oh god, you’re making me sick"
"I’m not done with you yet!" She raised a finger and pointed it menacingly at Buffy.
"Please, don’t start that again! Anyway, you’ll be able to show off some of your new clothes tonight when we go out tonight!"
"Where are we going?" Willow asked curiously, temporarily forgetting her previous threat.
"Cramoisi"
"Ahhh!!!" Willow leapt up and charged towards Buffy, enveloping her in a tight hug, then latched onto the blonde’s hands and started to jump up and down.
"I take it you’re excited"
"Oh my god! Buffy I love you, I love you, I love you!"
"Don’t thank me, it was his idea" She pointed towards Spike.
Willow bounded over to Spike and pounced on him, he landed on the floor with an "oof." Before he could make a comment she pressed her lips to his in a bruising kiss. When she pulled away she whispered seductively in his ear, "You are *so* going to get rewarded for that"
Buffy interrupted the two before they could get any farther in their actions, "hey- still in the room here!"
"They going at it again?" Faith asked as she wrapped her arms around her lover’s waist.
"Unfortunately yes"
Faith let out a small chuckle, "What’s got Willow so excited?"
"We’re going to Cramoisi tonight"
"Cramoisi, what does that mean?" a puzzled look covered the pretty brunette’s face.
"No clue" Buffy was equally puzzled now that she thought about it.
"It’s French for crimson. You should know this Buff- didn’t you take French in high school?"
"Yeah, and do you not remember the whole "the cow should
touch me from
Thursday incident"?"
Spike tried to stifle his laugh but failed, miserably. When he finally recovered Buffy was glaring at him, "Always knew you were a kinky one Slayer"
"Well, if you’re done" She shot another glare at him, "We have to start getting
ready"
"On it!" Willow picked up her bags and ran to their room. When Spike got there she was already in the process of putting on her outfit. She yelped when she felt Spike’s cool hands against her bare skin. He began to nuzzle her neck and pushed his erection into her butt.
"Mind if I collect on my reward luv?"
Without answering him, she turned around and began to kiss him with a building passion. He grabbed both of their bodies and stumbled backwards onto the bed. She quickly stripped both their bodies of the remaining clothes and moved him up the bed until he was propped up against the headboard. She straddled him and then grabbed his rock hard cock, positioned him and lowered herself onto him.
"Fuck.. Red" Spike leaned back against the headboard, his eyes closed.
Willow rode him fast and hard, just the way he liked it. And all too soon she found that she was on the edge of release, but held herself back, after all this was Spike’s reward. She tightened on him and moved her hips in a way that always drew him over the edge. Spike gripped her hips tightly and thrusted up into her tight hole, spilling his seed inside her. Willow threw her head back, gripped his chest, and let herself go, screaming his name. She collapsed onto him, breathing heavily.
"We have to get ready pet"
"Can’t move"
"If you don’t move then we won’t be able to go to Cramoisi" With those words Willow shot up and got off the bed and straight into the bathroom. Spike shook his head and let out a small laugh, and began to rifle through his clothes, trying to find a proper outfit for their night out.
~^~**~^~
"Bonjour! Bienvenue au Cramoisi! Je suis Janelle et je serai votre serveuse ce soir!"
Willow looked from the waitress to the three puzzled faces and laughed out loud before replying, "Bonjour Janelle! Ces trois ne savent pas parler français mais je connais un peu, mon nom est Willow"
"Hey! You do realize there are people at this table that don’t understand French!" Buffy complained then sat back. Faith rubbed the blonde’s shoulder, reassuring her that she wasn’t the only one.
After Janelle told the four the specials, in English, they ordered. Right as she was about to leave, she leaned over and told Willow quietly, "vous êtes une fille chanceuse, l'homme que vous êtes avec est très drool digne"
Willow blushed before replying, "croyez-moi, je savent!"
"What were you two talking about pet?" Spike asked, whispering in her ear.
Willow looked up at him and blinked innocently, "Nothing"
"Red.." he warned.
"Dance with me Spike" She led him to the Victorian styled dance floor and the two began to move to the music.
Down to the earth I fell
With dripping wings,
Heavy things won't fly
And the sky might catch on fire
And burn the axis of the world
That's why
I prefer a sunless sky
To the glittering and stinging in my eye
Willow was lost in her thoughts and she smiled to herself as she heard the last two lines to the verse, <tonight.. tonight- I’ll be his forever> She began to sing the lyrics softly to him.
I feel so light
This is all I wanna feel tonight
I feel so light
Tonight and the rest of my life
Spike closed his eyes as he began to sway to the music. He felt so at peace, he always did when he was around her. <gods, how I love her>
Gleaming in the dark sea
I'm as light as air
Floating there breathlessly
When the dream dissolves I open up my eyes
I realize that
Everything is shoreless sea
Weightlessness is passing over me
<I can’t believe how safe I feel in his arms.. safety in a vampire’s arms no less> she mused to herself.
Everything is waves and stars
The universe is resting in my arms
I feel so light
This is all I want to feel tonight
I feel so light
Tonight and the rest of my life
"Will you be mine?" Spike asked as the end of the song neared, he knew the answer but he wanted to reassure himself and give her one last time to back out.
"I *am* yours Spike, now and always"
When the song ended, they had kept on dancing. Soon the music and lyrics faded into one another as both were oblivious to their surroundings. Their focus was only on each other. That night was perfect, as was the rest of their days. It seemed the heavens and stars themselves were smiling down upon them. As long as they had the love of one another, they were content.
"The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love,
and be loved in return"