Please see previous parts for disclaimer, etc.
**********
Spike kicked at the dirt angrily. He hadn’t been
invited to the moron’s birthday party, and he knew he
wasn’t getting into the apartment. Instead, he was
stuck hanging around outside like a bloody vagrant,
waiting for the gang to head out somewhere so that he
could follow.
A familiar presence suddenly drew his attention, and
Spike turned to see his sire’s black convertible pull
up. “Hello, what’s this?” Spike murmured to himself.
As he watched, Angel stepped out of the car before
walking around to open the door for the redhead.
“I’m really nervous, Angel,” Willow whispered. She
smiled up at him tentatively, looking for
reassurances.
“We’re going to be fine,” Angel said, pressing a soft
kiss to her forehead. He glanced up towards the open
window where he could hear music and the sound of
Xander’s voice. “But we’d better go up. We’re
already late.” Willow nodded and led Angel into
Xander’s apartment building.
Spike stared in shock, his cigarette falling from his
lips forgotten. Red was a vampire, and from the looks
of things she and Angel had gotten pretty close.
Spike felt a slight twinge of jealousy as he
remembered the tender way Angel had looked at the
redhead. He frowned, remembering that he had once
been his sire’s favorite. Spike looked up towards the
open window, wondering how the gang was going to react
to this latest bit of news. He glanced around before
following his sire and the redhead up the stairs.
“When is Willow supposed to get here?” Buffy asked.
She was anxious to find out exactly what was going on
in LA and to hear if Angel still loved her as much as
he always had. She had hardly spoken the words before
there was a soft knock on the door.
Xander threw it open excitedly. He reached out to hug
the redhead, intending to pick her up and spin her
around. Instead, he ended up on the floor, arms empty
as he stared in shock and horror at his best friend.
“Wills?”
Willow smiled shyly from Angel’s arms. He had caught
her when she’d collided with the invisible barrier and
fallen backwards. “I’ve missed you, Xan,” she said.
She leaned forward, pressing her forehead against the
invisible barrier as her hands came up rest on the
doorjamb. Tears formed in her eyes as she stared at
her childhood friend.
“Oh dear Lord,” Giles said softly. “Willow, is this,
are you?” he stammered.
“I had to,” Angel said hastily. He wanted to do
anything possible to prevent submitting his childe to
an interrogation by her friends.
“Are you evil?” Xander asked quietly. He stood just
inside the doorway, staring at the redhead carefully.
Willow opened her eyes and returned his gaze. She
said nothing, only smiled at him.
Xander knew immediately that she was still Willow.
“God, I’ve missed you, Wills. You guys come on in.”
Willow stepped inside and drew the brunette into a
tight hug. She smiled at him happily before letting
him go and looking at the others.
“Hi,” she said weakly.
“Hello, mates,” Spike said cheerfully. He’d waited in
the hallway until Xander said the general invitation,
then wandered in to see what happened. He nodded at
his sire, then stopped and stared as he noticed a new
scent.
Angel saw Spike’s knowing look and hoped that the
blonde would have the common sense not to mention
anything about it. Unfortunately, history hadn’t
shown that to be the case.
“How, how did this happen?” Giles asked. He hugged
Willow tentatively, unsure how to react. He couldn’t
deny his happiness in seeing the redhead, but he hated
to think of her as being a creature of the night.
“She was dying, Rupert. I would have lost her
forever.”
Buffy, who had been quiet until now, pounced on his
comment. “What do you mean *I* would have lost her?”
“How are you doing, Buffy?” Willow asked cheerfully,
hoping to avoid this topic of conversation.
“I’m fine,” Buffy said, icily. “What did you mean,
Angel?” she asked again.
“She gave me back my soul, Buffy. A permanent soul.
I didn’t want to lose her after she had done so much
for me.”
“Yeah, she’s done a lot to you. I mean, for you,”
Spike said snidely.
“What?” Buffy said angrily.
“Buffy, it doesn’t matter,” Willow said quickly. “You
have Spike now. What difference does it make what
Angel said?”
“Spike?” the slayer said distastefully.
“Spike?” Giles and Xander said in unison.
“He’s nothing to me,” Buffy continued, oblivious to
the stares of the others. “I’ll bet you went to LA
with this whole thing in mind,” she said angrily. She
advanced on the redhead who was still stinging from
the realization that Buffy never cared for Spike the
way she had. “You little slut,” Buffy spat. “Did you
restore his soul just so you could fuck him? Did you
really think he’d find happiness with you when he
could have me? You probably couldn’t have made him
lose the soul if you tried!” Buffy raised her hand to
strike the redhead, but her arm was stopped mid-swing
by Angel’s tight grip.
“Do not ever raise a hand against my childe again,
slayer,” Angel hissed. Buffy tried to hit him, but he
threw her backwards into the wall. “Know this, Buffy,
you cannot even begin to imagine the happiness Willow
has brought me. Giles, Xander, we’ll be in LA if you
need us.” He grabbed the redhead’s arm and began to
drag her towards the door.
“You can’t possibly want her!” Buffy shrieked. “You
love me!”
Angel turned and regarded the hysterical blond with
sad eyes. “I loved you once, Buffy. But I stopped
loving you a long time ago. Before I found out how
cheap and meaningless you could make something that is
supposed to be an act of love. Before you insulted
and attacked my childe. And even before all that, I
could never have loved you as much as I love Willow.”
Giles and Xander stood in stunned silence as Angel led
Willow out the door. Spike stayed for a moment before
running after them. Buffy sat on the floor fuming.
“Can you lock up when you leave?” Xander finally said
to the older man.
“Certainly. You go ahead.” Giles replied.
“Angelus!” Spike called as his sire and the redhead
got into the car. Angel turned to glare at the
blonde. “I’m your childe, too,” Spike said softly.
Angel didn’t say anything. “Please don’t leave me
here. Not now,” Spike pleaded.
Angel glanced at Willow who was sitting in stunned
silence. He knew that she was probably still in
shock. Neither of them could have been prepared for
the viciousness with which Buffy responded, and Angel
knew it was probably breaking her heart to know that
Buffy would so easily dismiss something that the
redhead would have cherished. He desperately wanted
to hold her, to reassure her, but Angel knew that
would have to wait until they got back to LA.
“Willow!” Xander called from the doorway of the
building. He ran towards the car and bent to rest on
the passenger side door. “You’ve never missed my
birthday.”
“I’m sorry, Xan, I just can’t…”
“Move over, Wills.”
“Excuse me?” Angel asked.
“Look, I don’t know what’s going on, but I intend to
find out. Willow is my friend, and nothing is going
to change that.” He looked at the redhead intently.
“I love you, Wills.”
“I love you, Xan,” the redhead said softly. Angel’s
heart twinged as the words he so desperately wanted to
hear were directed at another.
“Move on over then, sister!” Xander exclaimed
cheerfully. Willow scooted towards the middle of the
seat as Xander slid in beside her. “So, what kind of
fun things can we do in LA to celebrate the
anniversary of the great Alexander Lavelle Harris?”
“Angel?” Spike said softly.
“Get in back, Spike,” Angel said quietly. He slipped
behind the driver’s seat as Spike settled in behind
him. Angel squeezed his redheaded childe’s hand
tightly and was rewarded with a tentative smile.
Xander glanced at the bleached blonde. “You and
Buffy, huh?”
“Sod off.”
“Sorry. It’s just that Wills or I could have warned
you about her tendency towards self-centeredness.”
Xander leaned back, putting his arm around the
redhead. “Let’s get out of here.” Angel nodded in
agreement and pulled away from the curb.
**********
Angel watched through the window at the couple sitting
outside. He desperately wanted to hear what they were
saying, but he knew that the redhead needed some time
with her childhood friend. She had been through a lot
tonight, and she needed the comfort of someone
familiar. Angel just wished it could be him providing
that comfort and wondered if these feelings of
jealousy would ever go away. He sighed. At least
Spike had opted to go drinking instead of hanging
around the hotel. Angel didn’t think he could handle
the blonde right now.
Xander sat in shock as he listened to Willow finish
telling her story. “Wow. That’s a lot to absorb.”
“I’m sorry, Xan. I guess I should have told you about
it, but I just couldn’t handle being in Sunnydale. It
was just all too painful. And then, things happened
here and there was Angel, and…”
“I understand, Willow. I mean, I wish you had talked
to me about it, but I do understand. I just want you
to be happy, and it looks like Deadboy makes you
happy. He does, doesn’t he?”
“Yeah, he really does. He takes such good care of me.
He really loves me.”
“Do you love him?”
“I can’t really answer that right now. Please don’t
ask.”
“Sure.” The dark haired youth sat with his arms
around the redhead, marveling at how cool she felt.
It was definitely going to take some getting used to.
But his conversation with her had certainly confirmed
one thing – dead or not, she was still unmistakably
Willow.
“What are you going to do with both of them here?”
“I don’t know. My feelings for Spike are so confused
right now. I mean, I had just started to get to the
point of accepting that Spike and Buffy were together.
I kept telling myself that them being happy was all
that mattered. But they weren’t exactly happy, were
they?”
“Sure didn’t look like it.”
“And my feelings for Angel are complicated. Sometimes
it’s hard to tell where the bond ends and my true
feelings begin.”
“Does it really matter?”
“How should I know? And when did you become so
insightful?”
“Just because I never showed it before doesn’t mean I
wasn’t insightful before,” Xander teased. He glanced
at his watch and yawned. “I’m pretty tired, Willow.
Think Deadboy will let me stay here tonight? I can
call in sick to work tomorrow and catch a bus back
home.”
“I’m sure Angel will let you stay, but maybe you could
stop calling him Deadboy.”
Xander seemed to consider it for a moment. “Nah,” he
replied.
Willow sighed. “Do you have to leave tomorrow? Can’t
you just take a week off?”
“Hey, it’s taken years to get to this level of
responsibility. Let’s try to encourage the gainfully
employed human.”
Willow giggled. “Sorry. It’s just that I miss you.”
“I miss you, too. If Angel lets me, and assuming I
can sneak past the Buffzilla, I’ll come back and visit
you when I’ve got some time off.”
“I’d really like that.” Willow stood and led the
brunette inside. “Angel, can Xander spend the night
here?”
“Of course. Pick any bedroom you want.”
“Thanks. Goodnight, Will. I won’t leave without
saying goodbye.”
“Thanks, Xan. Sweet dreams. Oh, and happy birthday.
Hope we didn’t ruin it.”
“A birthday with you is always good.” Xander turned
and made his way up the stairs.
“How’d it go?” Angel asked. He turned to see tears in
the redhead’s eyes. “I’m sorry, Willow,” Angel said
as he cradled the crying redhead in his arms.
“S’okay,” Willow hiccupped. “It’s great seeing Xander
again. I’ve really missed him. But Buffy…I mean, I
never expected her to, to…”
“Shhh,” Angel soothed.
“Hey Peaches, where’s a bloke supposed to sleep around
here?” Spike asked, stumbling through the doorway.
Angel glared at the blonde angrily. “Willow, go to
our room. I’ll be there in a minute.”
Spike arched an eyebrow as the redhead disappeared.
“Our room? You two really are shagging, aren’t you?”
“Yes, we are. Funny how you didn’t seem to need to
know any of the facts before you blurted them out.”
Spike shifted uncomfortably under his sire’s angry
stare. “Didn’t mean to cause such a fuss about the
whole thing,” he said quietly.
Angel’s gaze softened as he stared at the blonde. It
was obvious to him that Spike was hurting too,
although the blonde might never admit it on his own.
“How long?” Angel asked.
“How long what?”
“You and Buffy.”
Spike shrugged, trying to give the appearance of not
caring. “A while. Months, I suppose.”
“Did you know?”
“Know what?”
“That you didn’t mean anything to her.” Angel watched
carefully, wanting to know the truth regardless of
what Spike said.
Spike opened his mouth to protest, but Angel’s knowing
look stopped him. “Yeah,” he said dejectedly.
Angel shook his head sadly but decided to let the
matter drop for now. “You can sleep in any of the
rooms you want. Just not the one that Xander is in.
And make sure the windows are sunproofed before you
fall asleep.” With that, Angel left the blonde
standing alone in the large empty lobby.