Not Goodness
Name: Charity a.k.a. BOB1
E-mail: charibob@aol.com
Disclaimer: I own nothing, Joss owns all. Please don't sue 'cuz I'm poor.
Rating: PG-13 (language)
Summary: Oz finds Willow and Spike in the park Part 19 of the Goddess, Thy Name Is...Willow?
Spoilers: Dopplegangland
Distribution: My site and whoever else wants it.
Feedback: Please, or else I'll get EVIL! You've all seen it. You know I can.
Dedication: To Ciderbreak, Calligraphy and Amanda for keeping me on the edge of my seat and online 24/7 eagerly awaiting new parts from them.
[ ] indicates thought
Author's note: No Angel in this one for the Angel lovers out there, but he'll be in the next one. And this one did need to be written before the
story could go anywhere else.

********

Oz got out of the van and walked up to the couple who were completely oblivious to his presence. He tried to rationalize things [ Maybe he forced
her, or she's possessed or the vampire Willow came back and it's not my Willow at all. ] but all his rationalizations were thrown out the window as
he came close enough to smell her over the scent of sex that lingered heavily in the air [ No smell of death on her, so not vampire Willow. ] And her moan of Spike's name in a breathless and completely content voice destroyed the idea that he had forced her in some way. It also caused a cloud of rage to descend over Oz and he began shouting at her.

"What the hell is going on?!?! No, wait. I can see just fine what the hell is going on! I can't believe you Willow! First Xander and now SPIKE?!?! What the hell is wrong with you? Are you completely insane or are you just as big a slut as Buffy said you were? How could you? With Spike of all people? And I believed you when you said no more of this shit. You lying conniving little bitch!"

Willow didn't speak, she just stared at Oz with a mixture of guilt and astonishment as he continued to rant and rave at her. Guilt because she
hadn't wanted to hurt him again, and astonishment because that was the most she'd ever heard him say at one time and with a raised voice no less. She didn't even notice her nakedness or Spike's similar unclothed state.

Spike, on the other hand, did notice and he swiftly found his shirt and put it on her. [She's mine, no matter what the poof says, and I'll be damned
again if I let the wolf or anyone else ogle her.] Once Willow was moderately covered, he turned to Oz and let in with a little tirade of his own.

"Where the hell do you get off you insolent little pup! For all you know, I could have forced her to do this."

"It sure as hell didn't look like she was fighting from where I was standing" Oz shot back.

"Well, it's none of your damn business anyway, so why don't you take a hike before I make you into a midnight snack."

"None of my business?!?!? She's *supposed* to be my girlfriend. So finding her fucking a demon in the park is very much my business!"

Spike tried to retort, only found that he couldn't speak. He looked over Willow, who seemed to be over her amazement and back in control. She gave him a look that said 'cool it, I'll handle this' so Spike let her take over the conversation, not that he could say anything else anyway until she lifted her spell. That didn't stop him from mentally promising vengeance if the wolf didn't stop his yelling.

"Oz," Willow spoke hesitantly and then buried her head in her hands for a moment. Oz swallowed his next comment, waiting for her to continue. When Willow lifted her head from her hands, her eyes were weary and her face was etched with sadness.

"I never meant for you to find out this way. In fact, I never meant for any of this to happen. I wouldn't blame you in the slightest if you hated me
forever, and I'd deserve it too. But please believe me when I say that the last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you again."

"How could you?" he asked in an incredibly sad tone of voice.

"It just sort of happened. I know that is no excuse and you deserve so much more, but that's all I can tell you. This past week has been so confusing and everything is happening so fast that I don't even know who I am anymore let alone what's going on." She examined him for a second, trying to gauge his reaction so far before she continued. His 'stoic' face was back on so she couldn't read his expression anymore. She took a deep breath before continuing, "But I can't say I regret that it happened. I do regret that you found out this way, but not the actually act itself. Over this past week, the only constants I've had have been Spike and Angel. Spike has made me feel incredibly loved and protected and quite frankly there have been a few moments where I think I might have actually gone completely off the deep end if he hadn't been there to keep me steady. I *am* sorry I hurt you, but I needed this--needed Spike."

Oz nodded once, the expression on his face hurt but accepting, before turning and walking quietly back into the night.

next