Author: nakeya
E-mail- nikkiepoo@aol.com and nfields@usc.edu
Disclaimer- BTVS stuff does not belong to me. I own nothing. Please do not sue me.
Distribution-Anybody who has Field of Dreams, go ahead and take it. If not, please let me know.
Rating- Pg 13 for now
Summary- Willow loves Spike, Willow needs Angel, they have problems
Spoiler - Up to season 4. Angel and Cordelia are not in LA though. Oh, and Willow does not live at the dorms, she's at home. For my pleasure, everyone goes to UC Sunnydale, except for Giles and Vamps of course.
Note- I know its been awhile since Field of Dreams, school has gotten
to me , but now I have an idea. Hope you like it. Please give feedback.
Helps me write faster.
~Part: 1~
Willow kicked the blankets off of the bed, her sweaty legs working desperately to soothe her fevered body. The antique mirror in the corner reflected every movement and when a sudden moan of pain erupted from the flustered girl on the bed, it was surrounded by a bright golden glow. Willow, deeply asleep and caught up in her own world of pain, never noticed the bronzed man step from the mirror, his eyes worried. He placed a hand on her arm and Willow violently shoved it away.
"No!" she screamed, her eyes still tightly shut. "No! No, please. Make it go away. Make it go away." Bringing her hands up to her body, she clutched at her abdomen furiously.
"Please." She whimpered one more time, tears running down her face.
Gabriel shook his head sadly and once again reached for her arm, his other hand quickly catching the hand that she had instinctively brought up to bat him away with. She continued to moan, her body huddling in on itself from the pain that her body was enduring.
"Shh! Willow, Shhh!" his hand began to glow as he stroked it up and down her arm. Willow's moans lessened and she sighed softly as her pain began to fade. With one last wild kick, her body relaxed and she was able to sink into a dreamless sleep. Gabriel lifted his hands and picked the blankets up off of the floor and covered her slowly as not to wake her up. He backed away towards the mirror and stepped through it, his brow still furrowed in worry.
~~~*~~~
Beep Beep Beep Bee-----
Willow slammed her hand down on the offending alarm clock and threw it across the room. Lifting her head slightly, she realized that she needed to get up and get ready for school. She rolled out of the bed and onto the floor, the shock of the hard floor helping her to wake up.
"Ow." She moaned as she stood up, rubbing her butt. Stumbling into the bathroom, she finished her morning ritual, got dressed and then headed downstairs to grab an apple and her backpack. Making sure she had everything, she flung open the door and stepped out just as Cordelia pulled up in her "Queen C" mobile and honked her horn.
"Hey Cordy!" she said as she slid into the passenger side of the car.
"Hey Willow," Cordelia said, her eyes watching Willow closely. Willow noticed her staring and stuck her tongue out at her.
"I'm fine." She said. "Don't worry about me. That's my job."
"I'm your friend. I'm supposed to worry about you."
"You are a great friend too. But I can handle it."
"But-" Cordelia started to say, but Willow made a zipping motion with her hand above her mouth and Cordelia lost her voice. When Cordelia glared at her and pointed to her throat meaningfully, Willow ignored her and enjoyed the silence. Cordelia stomped on the brakes and sat there staring at Willow until she snapped her fingers and Cordelia was able to talk again.
"I hate it when you do that." Cordelia said to Willow after a moment, and she restarted the car and headed towards UC Sunnydale.
"I know." Willow said. "That's why it's so funny."
Cordelia stuck her tongue out at Willow and giggled when she merely raised an eyebrow.
"Hi Wills." Buffy whispered to her when she snuck into their psych class, 5 minutes late.
"Hey Buffy. Did I miss anything?"
"Nah. Well, except for Riley and his tight jeans. But I don't think you would care about that with your thing for Spike and all."
"You thought right." Willow said smiling. The mere mention of Spike had her daydreaming about him for the rest of the lecture so that when Buffy began waving her hand in front of her face, she jumped.
"Somebody was so not into class today," Buffy said. "And for once it was not me."
Willow giggled.
"I can't help it. I haven't seen him for two whole nights. I may go in to withdrawal." She said as they walked from the lecture hall towards the cafeteria. Buffy glanced over at her friend and although it was hard to spot with the permanently healthy glow that Willow now sported on a daily basis as a result of her new Godlike status, there was some type of strain present behind her jubilant facade.
"God! Why is everybody staring at me today?" Willow huffed.
Startled out of her inspection of Willow, Buffy smiled guiltily.
"Sorry Willow. We are worried about you. Have you heard from Spike? Has he found anything to help with the whole," her voice lowered "Angel thing?"
"Not yet. He's coming back tonight from LA. He was supposed the meet with his contacts last night and I didn't talk to him this morning."
Buffy's face grew serious and she stepped forward to hug Willow tightly. "It will all be okay Willow."
"Hey! Are you guys providing the campus with some girl on girl action? " Xander hollered from 10 feet away. Willow pulled away from Buffy and smiled at Xander.
"You wish!" she replied when he got closer.
"Where are you guys headed?"
"Cafeteria." They said together.
"All right! Food!" he said as he flung his arms around their shoulders. "I'm always up for that." Willow hugged his waist tightly, happy that he was there to lighten the mood. She didn't think that she could think about Angel right now. It hurt too much.
That night at Giles' house, they all huddled around the table and stared at the front door expectantly. When Spike walked through it, Willow jumped up and flung herself in his arms and rained kisses all over his face. Spike dropped his bag and wrapped his arms around her waist, his mouth devouring hers as he spun them around and slammed her against the door. When Willow actually wrapped one of her legs around his hips, Giles stood up and forcibly removed Spike from the girl.
"Hey! You bloody twit! I haven't seen her in 48 hours. You could have at least given me five minutes!" Spike growled at him.
"Not against my door. And besides, we need you to tell us what you found in LA." Spike growled again, picked up his bag and dragged Willow with him over to the couch where he pulled her down onto his lap. When he seemed content to simply nibble on Willow's neck with 5 pairs of eyes watching him, Buffy finally exploded and threatened the best way she knew how when it came to Spike.
"I will move Willow and stick her in a holy water bath so that you won't be able to touch her for days if you do not tell us what you found." She said, smirking. Spike immediately set a smiling Willow aside and looked at the others.
"Nothing." He said.
"Nothing?" Willow said, her face falling. Spike turned towards her. "Nothing, Pet. No one has any idea why you are connected to Angel. The gypsies I spoke to said that bringing him back from hell should not be causing the two of you pain when you are separated."
Willow stood up and began pacing, her bright hair covering her distraught face. "I'm worried about Angel." She said.
"What?" Spike said. "You should not be worried about that Poof, he should be here helping us to figure out what the hell is going on. Instead he is sulking at that mansion, refusing to speak to us. It's been two weeks since we have been back from that fairy tale hell. Why am I doing all of the work to help his nancy ass?" Spike, jealous of her need for Angel, clenched his fists in anger.
"Maybe we should go and see him." Cordelia suggested.
"No. We are trying to help him and all he wants to do is sulk because he didn't get the girl. Let him come to us." Spike said.
"Why don't you both just share Willow?" Anya asked. Threesomes were okay in her book, especially with two hotties like Spike and Angel.
When Spike turned to her, his golden eyes flashing, Anya gulped. "Maybe not." She whispered.
Willow stepped up to Spike and smoothed out the ridges in his forehead with her fingertips. "You will never have to share me." She soothed, knowing how he had felt about sharing Dru with Angelus. "But we need to talk to Angel. This pain is getting to me. It's almost too hard to take."
"Okay." He conceded. "We'll go see him."
~~~*~~~
Angel sat in the darkened corner, his eyes closed. The pain that was ripping through his body was almost unbearable. When a particularly strong wave struck him, he gripped the wooden handle of the chair so hard that it broke off in his hand. Opening his eyes quickly, he groaned as he realized that shards of wood were piercing his fingers. The pain was very small compared to what he was currently feeling. Ignoring the shards, he stumbled to the refrigerator, threw open the door and removed his last bag of blood. Ripping into it savagely, he sighed in relief as his pain ebbed fractionally. He tossed the empty container on the counter, too weak to even walk to the trash basket. His legs crumbled beneath him and he landed on his back on the hard tiled floor. Angel brought his clenched fists up to his eyes, red tears flowing down his cheeks and staining the floor.
"I am so fucking pitiful." He said to himself. Staring at the ceiling, he thought over the past two weeks. When he had first gotten back, he had been so sure that Willow would change her mind and come back to him. He had thought that the pain that resulted at their lack of contact was too much for someone to choose to endure. Especially someone as small as Willow. Well, he'd obviously thought wrong. Here he was, too weak too even go out and get more blood, while she was probably out somewhere fucking Spike. He growled at the thought. The fact that she had chosen Spike over him had both shocked and hurt him. Somewhere along the way of the forced relationship, he had fallen in love. And she had left him. His face changed from its smooth human façade into that of his demon and he viscously kicked the cabinet door that was nearest him. Gritting his teeth, Angel dug his fingers into the tiles beneath him, creating more damage to the bloodstained floor as he tried to regain control over his demon. And even though it was as weak as he was, his anger was allowing it to become stronger. Angel began to fear that if Willow continued to ignore him, his demon would break free from the weakened bonds that held him. And he feared what would happen to Willow and Spike if that happened.
~~~*~~~
"Angel?" A soft voice called into the darkness.
"Why is it so dark?" Buffy whispered as she stepped slowly into t he Mansion, Willow, Spike, Xander, Giles, Anya and Cordelia following closely behind.
"Angel?" Willow called again, her voice raised slightly.
"Deadboy! Come out come out wherever you are!" Xander shouted int o the darkened room. The whole group turned as one to hush Xander. "Geez. I was just trying to help."
Spike stepped forward, his vampiric senses allowing him to see into the darkness. He found a light switch and flipped it, causing light to flood into the room. A room that was trashed; chairs were overturned, carpet was lifted out in chunks, one chair in the corner had a missing handle, and there were scratches as if made by nails on the walls. Cordelia gasped, horrified that the once beautiful, though dark, mansion was in shambles.
"What in the bloody hell?" Spike asked, his eyes wide. Willow came to stand by his side, frowning.
"What if somebody came and attacked him? What if he's hurt? What-?"
"Pet. Don't worry. I'll check the back rooms. Buffy, check the kitchen." Though he didn't like her worrying about Angel, he would do whatever he could to ease her mind. He loved her.
With that, the group separated to find Angel. After awhile, the horrified shriek coming from the kitchen drew them together again. Willow began sobbing when she saw Angel on the floor, his pain obvious, even in his unconscious state.
"Oh my god. I've killed him." She moaned. "It's my fault. I abandoned him." She slid onto the floor, tears running down her face, her voice raised hysterically. "Angel." She whispered. "Angel, please say you are alright. Angel!" she continued to pat his face as she begged him to wake up from whatever state he was in.
Spike watched her cry over Angel and had to restrain himself from pulling her away from him by the hair. Instead, he stormed out of the room and the mansion, slamming the door behind him. Willow didn't notice as she continued to shake Angel, her cries growing louder in desperation.
"Angel!" she shrieked. Buffy knelt down next to her and stroked her hair as she watched Angel. Buffy was scared that Angel actually was dead. Her heart was breaking as she watched her ex-lover just lie there motionless.
"Come on Angel." Buffy whispered. "Wake up. Wake up."
The scooby gang, minus Spike, looked over the demolished kitchen with
the fallen Angel lying in the center. They gripped each other's hands,
silently praying for him and hoping that he would be all right. He had
to be, for Willow's sake. She would probably die of guilt if he wasn't.
~Part: 2~
Spike stomped out of the front of the mansion, his ice-blue eyes slightly amber with the force of his anger. He couldn't handle Willow crying over the poof every five minutes. He knew he was being selfish, but they had some kind of supernatural connection. How could he compete with that? Sure, she loved him, but she wasn't in physical pain when she was apart from him. That very fact threatened him and he hated being threatened.* So what do I do when I feel threatened?* Spike asked himself. He grinned as he stormed towards Willie's Bar.
~~~*~~~
"How is he doing?" Buffy asked as she walked into the room, her face concerned.
"Willow looked up, her eyes sad. "He hasn't opened his eyes", she said, glancing towards Angel whom they had moved into his bedroom after finding his unconscious body. Willow sat in a large chair that dwarfed her body, clutching his hand.
"How about you? How are you doing?"
"I'm worried about Spike. He left. I feel so guilty, but I can't let Angel be hurt just because my boyfriend doesn't like to share. Angel is still my friend."
"And the pain?"
"It's receded since I've been with him. Not as constant as it's been," she moved forward to peer into Angel's face, "and he seems less tortured than before too."
Buffy nodded. "Xander called, says he hasn't seen Spike anywhere."
Willow sighed and leaned back in the chair, closing her eyes.* Please say he hasn't left me, please.*
~~~*~~~
Angel found himself trapped in darkness. He took a step forward and felt an invisible hand clamp down on his ankle and keep him in place. When he tried to struggle, the hand developed claws that dug into his skin, effectively halting his movements.
"Where am I?" he asked the darkness and heard his question echoedback at him.
Instead of an answer, a bright light appeared to the left of him in the dark. He stared transfixed as Willow appeared within that light, or at least an image of her. Her eyes were closed and she was sitting in one of his velvet chairs in his bedroom, her eyes closed. Tears were seeping down her cheeks as she clutched at his hand, his hand connected to his body that lay oblivious in his bed. Is that what was wrong? Was he unconscious? Is this what it is like to be in a coma? As he questioned himself, the image changed. He recognized the mansion, but his eyes widened at what happened next.
He watched as he saw himself fall naked from mid-air, his body wracked by shudders, his eyes wild, and his features twisted into that of his demon. Angel stared shocked at that recreated image. He hadn't realized he had ever been that animalistic. He tensed, knowing what was going to happen next. The picture show continued showing Willow hesitantly walking through the front door of the mansion, her face confused but determined.
"Hello?" she whispered, her voice low. It was clear she did not know what to expect or even what she was looking for. When she saw Angel on the floor, she gasped, her mouth falling open. She rushed forward unthinkingly.
"Oh my God, Angel," she said, her small hands running over him, searching for injuries. Angel growled slightly, his body reacting to her touch. Willow didn't even notice as she babbled. "I woke up with this need to come here, I had no idea I would find you," she said, almost to herself. She looked up from her inspection. "Are you okay?" she asked. Willow's eyes grew large as she stared into the amber gaze which followed her every move as if she were his next meal. "Angel?" she asked again, clearly uncomfortable. Angel didn't answer, instead he reached up and under her knee length skirt, grabbing and tearing off her panties before she even realized what had happened.
The Angel who watched the images couldn't believe that he had acted that way and tried closing his eyes. However, whatever it was that held him captive did not like that idea and squeezed until he opened them again. Angel saw himself grab Willow's hair, pulling her down next to him.
Again, the girl tried to speak, "Angel, what---" Her question was cut off as Angel thrust a questing finger between her thighs and latched on to a now bare nipple, suckling hungrily. Willow made a squealing noise, her mouth forming an "O" of surprise. When Angel's thumb found her clit she groaned and closed her eyes, little pleasurable noises escaping her lips. It was only when Angel had stripped off the rest of her clothes that she got a panicked look on her face.
"Angel!" she said pleadingly, locking her thighs together as the feral and animal-like Angel tried to move between them. "Angel!" she tried more forcefully when he began to pry them apart, his eyes intent. He looked up sharply at her tone of voice, his gaze seemingly a little clearer.
'It's wrong. What about Buffy?" she groaned, for he had grabbed a nipple and was twisting it slightly.
No response.
"Me Willow. Not Buffy!"
No response.
"I have a boyfriend. Oz. You have a girlfriend. Buffy."
No response.
When his hand wondered back down to her thighs, she tried one last time. "I took a bath with holy water!" Angel stared at her blankly for a secondmore and then pulled her legs open. Willow sighed loudly, for some reason not afraid of this Angel. He was like a child trying to play with a pet that wouldn't cooperate. Happy to find that he had passed the challenge of getting her legs open to him, he pushed his face between her thighs and brought Willow to orgasm, leaving her body relaxed and flushed. Angel took this as consent to wrap her legs around his waist and enter her with one stroke. Willow's eyes shot wide open and she winced in pain as he tore through her virginal barrier. Angel buried his face in her neck and nuzzled, making indistinguishable soothing sounds. When her body relaxed around him, he began to move slowly. Angel watched her face, his amber eyes now brown as he stared into her panting face, the skin flushed. Leaning forward, he licked her bottom lip slowly, then sucked it into his mouth. Willow groaned and brought her hands up, holding his face in place as they ravished each other's mouth. Angel began to speed up his thrusts, his growls increasing in volume, even overcoming Willow's small shout as she came, finally quieting down as he pierced the upper curve of her left breast when he too shuddered with release.
The image disappeared, leaving a dejected Angel staring into the empty space where he had seen Willow and himself replaying their first sexual encounter.
"Why?" he shouted into the darkness, "Why did you show me this?" Not expecting an answer, he jumped when a voice answered.
Because within that first encounter, you will find the answers.
~Part: 3~
"Give me another one!" Spike growled at Willie, right before he gulped down the brightly colored concoction that Willie had placed before him, not five seconds before.
"And then the chit started sobbing and throwing herself all over him, talking about how she should never have stayed with me," he slurred to the person sitting to his right, his story a little exaggerated, "she didn't evenglance at me when I left."
Madera patted his arm softly, her long blue fingers rubbing his arm soothingly. "It's all right, Spike," she purred, "she doesn't deserve you, you can do so much better." Then she scooted closer to him so that one bare thigh grazed his denim-covered leg. Spike, finally realizing that he wasn't just talking to thin air looked up at the woman. He blinked. She was blue. "You're blue." He spluttered, then cocked his head to the side asif examining her, "but you're pretty for a blue person. That's a compliment, you know. I usually hate blue things. They tend to attack me." He held up two fingers, leaving a small space between them. "Especially little ones that come out of pieces of wood." He finished, muttering something about smurfs, still squinting at his hand.
"Thank you... I think." Madera said. When he continued to stare at his fingers, she waved a hand in front of his face. He snapped out of his trance and focused blurry eyes on her.
"What?"
"Do you want another drink?" she asked, noticing that he had finished the last drink that Willie had brought him, rounding up his drink total to about 20 shots, she was surprised he hadn't collapsed yet. Well, I guess he needs some help with that endeavor, she thought. Madera motioned to Willie, who rolled his eyes but brought the drink before scuttling a way like a little rodent. Madera smirked. Humans, vampires, demons... they were all so stupid. She hated this world. * The sooner I finish my mission the faster I get back to my world. * With that thought, Madera turned to Spike, her expression determined.
Moving closer to him, she placed a well-aimed kiss on his jugular. Spike jumped away from her so quickly that she would have fallen if she hadn't been clutching his arm.
"What the bloody hell are you doing?" he barked at her, obviously flustered. The neck to a vampire was a very erogenous zone and they didn't take kindly to just anyone invading that space. Madera took the forward approach and leaned her body into his, feeling behind him so that she could reach his drink. Fortunately, he was worried about her next move and not about someone spiking his drink, therefore he didn't notice the clear mist form under her hand, turning the liquid a bright blue before it settled back to its original blood-red color. Satisfied that she had achieved what she wanted, Madera pulled back slightly.
"You don't want me?" she asked sadly, her mouth down turned, eyeswide and innocent.
"No! I mean," Spike said, hoping to get away from this situation without another angry blue creature after him. "I would if I didn't have a girlfriend." With that, Spike nodded, happy with finding a good answer.
"But she wants that Angel guy. She's with him right now. That's what you told me." She said her words carefully, waiting for a reaction. She didn't wait long. He pushed her away and grabbed his drink, draining it in seconds. Madera smiled, but quickly hid it when he turned back to her, his eyes half closed, the effects of the spell already working.
"The poof..." he tried, but the words wouldn't come out of his suddenly dry mouth. He glanced at the blue girl. She just smiled at him serenely and asked if he needed fresh air. He nodded, wobbling towards the door with her help.
Back at the bar, Willie shook his head and sighed in relief as the odd couple departed. The girl scared him and Spike was trying to drink him out of business. Good riddance, he thought, hoping that they never came back.
Madera pulled him out the door towards the alley. He came willingly, as he was barely able to walk. When they got next to a door, she shook him roughly.
"Spike?" she asked. When there was no answer, she realized that he had succumbed to the very potent mixture of sleeping powders at last.
"Thank you." she whispered gratefully to no one at all and let him drop to the dirty floor of the alley. After kicking away a rat that had ran over her foot, she ran her hand over the door and watched as a small swirling light appeared, growing until it was as tall as she was. Satisfied that she had opened the right portal, she leaned over and picked Spike up, throwing him like a sack over her shoulder.
"All right blondie," She said as strode through the portal," time to complete my mission so that I never have to deal with this dirty world ever again!
Once she was inside, the portal disappeared leaving behind an alley deserted except for an open-mouthed Xander who had been about to enter Willie's bar in search of Spike.
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