Lost

By Velvet Crypt

Chapter One

Like some horrid slow motion sequence, Xander watched the jagged lightening arc from the sky headed straight for the power pole above their heads. Through the torrents of rain, he saw sparks. The demons kicking their asses didn't seem quite so important anymore, as one of the wires was wrenched free of it's notch and began sailing for the ground.

He screamed out a warning for all to run, to get out of the water. As though that were possible. The freak thunderstorm, though magically created, spared nothing on the drenching sheets of rain it produced. They'd all be lucky if they could find a place somewhere on the street that wasn't under water. He could see everyone; including the demons begin to run.

Just as the wire kissed the ground, it was grabbed and held high in the air. Spike wrestled for control of the living thing as the power within jerked him around on his feet. Xander stood motionless for a brief moment, wondering what the hell the bleached wonder was doing. That was made clear in the next second.

"Go, you bleedin' idjit!" The vamp howled at him. "I can't hold this thing for long." He stumbled backwards, out of the danger zone, and stared at the insane vamp with dawning horror. Spike was attempting to get as far away from the puddles of water as he could before turning loose of the wire. However, he didn't count on the stupidity of the demons they'd been fighting.

Just as he turned the hissing snake free, the demon jumped him. He failed to get the momentum needed to carry him to safety. He was pinned under the demon and watched in horror as the wire touched the water he was laying in.

Xander screamed at the same time as the vamp. He watched Spike's body begin to jump, and then to smoke. Running to the very edge of the newly formed lake, Xander found he could wrap his fingers around the leather duster that was the vamps prized possession. Careful not to let any bit of his flesh touch the water or Spike's body, he yanked the undead man out of the water.

He just as quickly rolled him back into the water, albeit a puddle on the opposite side of the electrified ocean, as Spike's shirt caught fire. Vaguely, he became aware of his name being screamed and hands clutching him. Looking around, he saw the other scoobies either glaring at him or crying. He looked down at Spike. The vamps flesh was blackened. He could see where parts of his clothing had fused to him.

Granted, Spike was a killer. He'd threatened them all at some point. But he'd changed lately. And Xander thought it had more to do with the relationships he was building with them all than it did with the chip. And Xander couldn't help himself. He counted the bleached wonder a friend. A friend who could have run when he saw the lightening hit. Whose vampiric speed would have put him into safety. Who chose instead to risk his life so that the others could run. He let rational thought fly out the window. He scooped Spike into his arms, wincing at how light he was.

Ignoring the others, he stalked on through the cemetery. There wouldn't be any more demon fighting tonight. The demons had realized their good fortune and scrambled away when the opportunity presented itself. And he needed to get Spike home.

The rest of the scoobies followed Xander on a straight path from the cemetery to his front door, trading bewildered looks with each other but not speaking. As Xander moved through the final paces of his walkway, Buffy darted in front of him and opened the door. Stepping back quickly, she nonetheless saw the impotent rage consume Xander's expression when he tried walking through his front door only to be stopped by the body of the vampire.

"For fuck's sake," he ground out, "Obviously, I want him to come in if I'm fucking carrying him!" He pushed forward again and was rewarded this time with no resistance. He made a beeline for the couch and gently placed Spike on the cushions.

"Ok, I need some things," he turned to face the others. Anya walked out of the bedroom and stared in amazement at the charred body on her furniture. "I need some blood. Here…" He reached into his pocket and jerked out a wad of bills.

"Xander, what is Spike doing flaking on my sofa?"

Giles reached out and plucked the cash from Xander's hand. "I'll get it. Human blood, I'm assuming?" Xander nodded and Giles took a moment to count the money. "Xander?" He looked up in astonishment. "There's $300 here!" Xander looked at Giles as though he were a particularly dense child.

"Yes, Giles, I know how much is there. Now go spend it. I need supplies from the store; bandages, antibiotics, burn cream, etc., etc.," He pulled out another wad of cash. This time Willow took it. She looked warily at it and then at Xander. "Yes, Willow, there's the same amount there. Now, go! Buy out the store, I don't care. Just hurry."

"Xander, why are you giving our money away?"

"I'll go with Willow," Buffy shot an irritated look at Anya. Xander nodded.

"Tara, I need some help getting him out of his clothes and into a bath." She nodded and moved toward the couch.

"Xander! You are not stripping another man on my couch."

Xander finally met his girlfriend's gaze. "What the hell is your problem, Anya?" He growled. "Spike, the guy who saved our asses tonight, is hurt. He needs help. I am going to help him. If you want to help, fine. If all you're going to do is bitch, get the hell out of the way and shut up."

Anya stared at him in disbelief for long moments. The silence was deafening. Finally, she turned with a flare of her robe and disappeared back in the bedroom with a loud slam of the door. "Fine, now go people," Xander turned back to Spike as though he hadn't just told his girlfriend to fuck off in front of all of his friends over an undead male vampire who was making him nauseous with worry.

The others practically ran out of the front door and Xander swung Spike into his arms again. He followed Tara into the bathroom and gently placed Spike on the rug. As Tara ran the bath, he tried to pull off the duster with as little painful actions as possible. Tara joined him in tugging, and they soon had a rhythm in which Xander would gently hold up a body part and Tara would attempt to pry the clothing covering it off.

Eventually, she got up and retrieved a knife. Several times, she had to cut around parts melted onto his flesh. Luckily, his duster remained unscathed, but his boots were an entirely different story. Xander thought for a bit that they'd have to saw the melted plastic and metal off. Eventually, a naked and crisped Spike reclined in the tub. Xander couldn't even get embarrassed over uncovered things as even they were scorched.

Tara apparently felt the same, because she just handed him a soft sponge and went to work on his legs, leaving Xander to tenderly wipe the flaking skin off of his torso. They worked quietly for long moments. Then…

"You've been burned too, haven't you?"

Xander was slightly surprised, but then, Tara always seemed to know more, to see more than you. "Yeah, how'd you know?"

She lifted a foot and slid the sponge around the mangled toes. "You know how to bathe him to cause the least pain. You knew what to do in the first place. You're face is full of pain. Both for him and remembered." She shrugged.

He sighed. "I was 10. My father…well, let's just say he did things to his son that no father should ever do." Tara nodded, seemingly not focusing on him. He held back a smile. She was all ears. "While he was…performing… he slugged back some JD and managed to dump it all over my back and ass. He laughed so hard when I started to cry from the alcohol burning the open tears, that he dropped his lit cigarette."

Tara winced. "My back went up in flames. He ran out, took care of himself. I rolled around on the carpet til the fire was out. He never came back. That night at least. He never asked in the morning if I was okay. I had to take care of 3rd degree burns on my back by myself at the age of 10." He snorted a decisive snort. "I learned a lot of things about pain that summer."

They spent the rest of the time in the bathroom in silence. Tara leaving Xander to his thoughts and Xander trying desperately not to think them. When all the ash had been removed and the blisters and reddened skin on Spikes body were visible, Xander reached in and picked the vamp up again. Clutching the wet body close, he moved them back out to the living room.

Just as he was settling the vamp back on the couch, the door opened and the scavenging teams arrived. Giles winced when he saw the state of Spike's naked body and rushed into the kitchen to warm up some of the just procured blood. Buffy and Willow began emptying bag after bag of medical supplies.

"We had to go to three stores to get this much." Willow smiled. "But I had them order extra to replace it so in a couple of days, we should be able to buy more." Xander nodded, all his attention back on the vamp.

"How can I help, Xander?" Tara touched his shoulder lightly. He smiled painfully at her in thanks and gestured to the bags.

"I'm gonna spread the burn cream over him and then mummy him in bandages. You can start at one end like in the bathtub. We'll meet in the middle." Tara grabbed one of the tubes and went to work.

He carefully attended each portion of Spike's body, not even recognizing areas that were previously off limits. He was unaware that he'd begun murmuring comments under his breath. Tara glanced at him, but then wisely let it go. He continued telling Spike how brave he was, how strong he was, how he couldn't die and leave Xander alone.

When he looked up from placing the final bandage, Giles handed him a mug full of blood. He glanced at it and then at the unconscious Spike. "Could someone get me the baster out of the kitchen?" Moments later, baster in hand, Xander began Operation Feed Spike. He filled the baster with blood and then gently pried the vampire's mouth open. Running the tool as far down Spike's throat as he dared, he released the precious liquid directly down his throat.

His relief was audible as the vamp's throat worked enough to swallow. He went through several bags of blood before tenderly wiping Spike's mouth and setting the mug on the table. Turning, he faced the others for the first time that evening, with his total attention.

"I know you all think I'm insane." He began. Buffy stepped forward and placed a finger over his lips.

"No Xander. We don't. We were there. We saw what he did for us. Big Bad or not, we've kinda gotten used to the big dufus. I don't know what I can do, but if you do, tell me. I want to help." Xander smiled against her finger and pulled her into a big hug that soon turned into a group Scooby hug. Even Giles hovered on the outskirts.

"I think you all should go home right now." He ordered. "I'll take care of Spike. I'm gonna call work in the morning, use the vacation time I have coming. Go ahead and check on us tomorrow, but tonight, you need rest." Hesitant acceptance met his order and soon the others were waving goodbye and Xander was shutting the door.

He walked back to Spike and took up position next to his head. And waited.

---

Dawn knocked on the door but when no answer came, she carefully cracked it open and peeked in. Her heart clenched at the sight of the mummy wrapped Spike looking so small on the couch. And then she took in the man at his side. Xander was curled up into a ball, his head resting on the couch. Medicine bottles and discarded blood bags littered the coffee table.

She frowned as she though of the reason she'd come over. Anya had stormed into the Magic Shop, amazingly, she was late. She began ranting and raving about how stupid Xander was. How thoughtless he was being. She berated him for wasting their planned vacation time on nursing a dead man back to health. She screeched about his blowing his cash on frivolous things like blood and bandages. She'd planned on shopping this weekend.

Soon, she'd caught Giles' eye, which was as irritated as her own, and he gave her permission to go. She took it, and now she was here. Stepping carefully over to the sleeping human, she began picking up the mess. Soon, she had the room back in some semblance of order and she knelt by Xander's side.

"Xander? Xander, wake up." She called softly. She was rewarded by bleary brown eyes fluttering at her. "Hi. I came to help."

Xander sat up and quickly checked on Spike. Only when he was sure the vamp was still resting did he turn and smile at Dawn. "How long have you been here?" He asked in a voice still roughened from sleep.

"Just a few minutes. I picked up a bit, then woke you." She looked at Spike and bit her lip. "Buffy said it was bad. But this is awful. What can I do to help?"

Xander glanced at his watch. "Well, it's nearly 4 p.m. Time to change his bandages. You can help with that if you aren't too modest." He smiled.

"Sure, no problem. I don't really see how a charred willy is gonna do it for me though," she smirked pleased when her comment forced a laugh out of him. "So, how often do you change his dressings?"

"I alternate. One hour I'll change the bandages, the next I'll feed him." He was already at work getting the supplies out. Dawn stared at him for a long moment.

"Every hour?"

"Mmm hmmm," he replied absently.

"Xander, You went to work yesterday at 5 a.m. You went directly from there to the meeting and then on to patrol. Are you telling me you got up every single hour last night and today?"

"Mmm hmmm. Why?"

"Xander, you've been up for almost 36 hours."

"So? Spike needs to have constant attention. One wrong move and we could lose him." He raised an eyebrow. "I would have thought that you of all people wouldn't want that to happen."

"I don't! But Xander, you need sleep."

"I get sleep. I cat nap between hours."

"Xander!" she was getting frustrated. "A cat nap won't do it. You're wearing yourself out. Who'll take care of Spike if you drive yourself into the ground?" She sighed. "I'm on summer break. Why don't you let me watch him during the day? You can take over in the evening. That way, you can get some sleep."

He peered at her intensely. Finally, he seemed to come to a conclusion. "Fine. But let me show you what to do."

---

"He seems to be doing a lot better." Dawn shared with the group as they huddled around the kitchen table. "He drinks from a cup now as long as you lean him up. And the 1st degree burns are totally gone. The 2nd are fading." She looked into the living room at her charge and her charge's keeper. She smiled. "Xander still won't sleep in his bed. Anya is really pissed."

"Why won't he sleep in his own bed?" Willow asked in confusion.

"I think it's several reasons, myself." Dawn whispered conspiritally. "First, Anya is a bitch."

"Dawn!" Buffy admonished half-heartedly.

"Well, she is. She comes home and screams at him. Locks herself in her room and plays with these noisy vibrators and cheesy pornos. She comes out to order take out and pays for it with Xander's credit card. When she thinks no one is looking, she's mean to Spike too." Horrified looks crossed everyone's face

Dawn nodded. "She pokes him and says really crappy things to him. Xander tells me that Spike may still hear things, so we have to talk positively to him ad tell him how good he's doing. Anya just tells him how worthless he is and how she hopes he dies anyway. She even dumped out some of his blood until Xander told her that he'd only replace it and that she was dumping a new blouse or pair of shoes down the drain." She clenched her fists. "I hate her. Anyway, that's part of it. He stays out here so he doesn't have to go in there. Also to keep her away from Spike."

She smiled again. "He wants to be nearby in case I need something. But the big reason is his nightmares, I think."

"Xander is having nightmares?" Tara asked, worried.

"Yeah. I don't know what they're about. He never says anything. He just starts twitching and moaning. Then he jerks awake and the first thing he does is check out Spike. He'll run his fingers through his hair, or touch that spot being Spike's ear, where he didn't get burned. He'll only go back to sleep after he's made sure Spike is still there and still okay."

She glanced at her watch and got up from the table. "Xander, it's-" She was interrupted by the high-pitched beeping of a watch alarm. Xander shot up off of the chair and shook his head to clear the fog from if. "-ten o'clock." She finished with a smile.

"Mmmmm," he answered groggily. "Which is it?"

"Food." She replied, and sat back down. Xander rubbed his hands through his hair roughly and moved toward the kitchen. Eyes still half closed, he got a packet of blood, microwaved it, and poured it into a plastic cup without missing a beat. The scoobies watched as he made his way back to the couch.

He set the cup next to the arm and eased Spike into a sitting position. Sliding under him, he braced the vamp on his chest and picked up the cup. Gently, he opened the vamps mouth and began pouring the blood slowly down his throat. As he did, he murmured encouraging words. "Good job, Wil. You're doing so much better. I'm so proud of you. Drink it all down, now. We want you to get better."

They watched in amazement as he rocked the vamp back and forth slightly. The bedroom door opened and they were distracted by the sight of Anya storming out.
She took in the scene on the couch and rolled her eyes. "Is the baby still suckling, Xanny-mum?" She sneered.

Xander sighed and continued to pour. "I'm hungry, Xander. Give me your credit card. I want to order something."

Dawn snorted and looked at the others as if to say, 'see?'

"The card is on the table where you left it the last time you ordered food, Anya." Xander said quietly.

She didn't seem placated. "The others are here. Why don't you let them monster sit for a while and take me out to dinner?" She wheedled.

"No, Anya. It's my turn. Dawn sat with him all day and the others don't know what to do. Besides, I'm enjoying myself." He finished a bit snippily.

Anya flushed in anger and strode up to the back of the couch. Grinding her teeth, she snatched the cup from Xander's hand and jerked Spike's mouth open. With a vicious smile, she rammed the cup into his face and dumped the whole thing down into his mouth. Rivulets of blood poured down his face, soaking his bandages. Xander could see a new cut where the cup pinched his lip between it and his teeth.

"There. Now he's been fed. Get up and come to dinner with me." She threw the cup onto Spike's chest. Dawn was up and running for the couch. The three other girls stood in horror.

As soon as Dawn reached the couch, Xander gently transferred his precious cargo into her arms and stood. He moved so quickly, that no one realized his intentions until he had Anya pinned to the wall by her throat. Leaning closely in to her face, he bared his teeth.

"I have had just about fucking well enough of you, Anyanka." He growled. "I'm tired of your whining. I'm tired of your tantrums. I'm tired of listening to crappy 70's porno music while you fingerfuck yourself. I'm sick of your demands for sex. I'm sick of feeling inadequate. I'm sick of you telling me I'm inadequate. I need to help Spike. I need to have support from people who love me. I need to be wanted for more than my pocketbook and my crappy but plentiful performance in bed."

He smiled at the look on her face. "I'm fed up with you stockpiling your money away for a rainy day, but demanding that I keep you like a queen. I'm fed up with tiptoeing around your insecurities while you throw mine in my face and then share them with everyone we know. I don't love you anymore, Anya. I'm trying really hard, but I can't really remember why I loved you in the first place."

He dropped her. "We are finished. I'm going to beg my friends for a place to stay tonight, and then I'm going to take my vampire and leave. I will be back tomorrow to remove whatever personal belongings I still have after you shred everything I own to bits. You can have the apartment. You can have the furniture. You can have the fucking car. I don't care."

"All I want is my dignity back and my vampire. You can have everything else." He turned away and strode to the couch. "Is he okay, Dawnie?" He gently ran his hand over the platinum locks. Dawn nodded and glared at Anya. Xander turned to the girls.

"May I please stay at your place for tonight?" He asked tonelessly. "We'll be gone tomorrow evening,"

Buffy shook her head. "No, you won't. We have a 4th bedroom that's only been used for storage. While you're collecting your things here tomorrow, I'll clean it out and you and Spike can stay there for as long as you like." She smiled and moved to embrace Xander in a bone-crushing hug.

Chapter Two

"How's he doing today?" Buffy asked her sister. Dawn finished chewing her mouthful of eggs and swallowed.

"He's much more responsive. It's like he's just asleep now, not in a coma. And Xander's better. I convinced him that now Spike was resting and if he kept poking at the poor guy up every hour, he'd never recuperate." She grinned. "Course it was all an evil plot to make Xander actually sleep. I still go in and check to see if Spike needs food or bandage changes while Xander sleeps."

Buffy looked at her sister with a fond smile. "I'm really impressed with how mature you're being, helping Xander and Spike like this, Dawnie." Dawn blushed, then quirked an eyebrow.

"I'm really impressed with how mature you're being letting your mortal enemy and his lovesick caretaker stay here." Buffy's jaw dropped.

"Lovesick? Xander is in love with…Spike?"

"What about Anya?" Willow asked, just as shocked. "But he was with Anya!" Dawn rolled her eyes and looked at Tara. She was pleased to see the blonde smiling wryly at her girlfriend.

"Of course Xander is in love with Spike. He may not know it yet, but he's in love with him. And as for Anya?" She growled, making Buffy think maybe she'd been letting Dawn hang around Spike too much. "He left her didn't he? Finally."

Tara took Willow's hand. "Sweetie, Dawnie's right." She murmured. "Look at their auras the next time you see them together. They're beautiful." Willow turned her shocked look onto Tara.

"So you mean Spike loves Xander too?" She squeaked. Tara smiled patiently.

"Neither of them knows yet. I think as far as they're concerned they are just good friends. But their auras?" she actually shivered, "Spike is red, a deep red like blood."

Buffy snorted. "Well, didn't see that coming."

Tara continued through the interruption. "It's paler now, because he's hurt, but it's like fire when he's not. Xander is blue, a deep rich sapphiric blue like an ocean. It glows, and shimmers…like ice." Willow closed her eyes, feeling the pictures Tara's words were creating. "When they are together, their auras mesh. Fire and ice collide. If they were just friends, the auras would react like fire and ice, constantly pushing off of one another to gain dominance."

She smiled blissfully. "But they blend. They bleed into each other. They create an icy purple fire. It's beautiful." She sighed. Willow opened her eyes, calmed by the tones of her girlfriend's voice. Dawn looked satisfied. Buffy looked disappointed.

"This sucks! Why can't I see the purpley goodness? I get the crappy powers." She sulked, crossing her arms and sitting back with a pout. The others just giggled.

---

Xander had finally agreed to go pick up his stuff only after Dawn promised not to leave the vampire's side, even to pee, and swearing he'd only be gone an hour. Dawn rolled her eyes again and listened to him lecture her again on how to do the job she'd been doing for the last two days. Eventually, Buffy just grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the room.

She was beginning to wish she'd left him with Dawn, though, after watching him fidgeting and worrying for the entire drive. As she drew closer to Xander's apartment, she saw smoke. She smacked Xander on the arm to get his attention…okay, so she got a little bit of vindication in walloping him…and pointed to the rising column of flame.

He sat up and began worrying about something other than Spike. As they pulled into the parking lot, it became very clear what the smoke was from. A fire truck sat outside the apartment complex, but the firemen weren't trying to put out the flames. They were actually leaning back against their truck, laughing.

In the center of the parking lot was a huge bonfire. Standing next to it was Anya, looking satisfied. On closer inspection, Buffy could see bits and pieces of what was on fire. A Hawaiian print shirt, a comic book, and some wooden bookcase looking thingy. Xander's stuff. She glanced at Xander warily and was surprised at the look on his face.

He was grinning. He rolled down the window and waved a fireman over. "Excuse me? What's going on here?"o:p>
The man grinned back. "Broad got dumped by her boyfriend. She threw all his stuff out in the lot coupla days ago. Neighbors called the cops to complain and they told her to get rid of it." He leaned against the car, laughing. "So she set it on fire. Ain't hurtin' nothing, so we figured we'd let her get her jollies out."

Xander nodded. "I getcha. Well, good luck with the cleanup!" The laughing man walked back to the group of grinning guys. "C'mon, Buff. Let's go." He rolled the window up, snickering at the sight of his former life going up in flames.

"Xander? Aren't you pissed?"

He nodded and struggled to get his giggles under control. "Oh, sure, I'm pissed. But I pretty much asked for it, didn't I? I mean I did tell her I'd get whatever she hadn't trashed. I should have realized…hey, ex vengeance demon here."

"So, you're mad, but you're not surprised?"

He shrugged, still chortling. "Naw, I'm really not even mad. I got what mattered."

Buffy stared straight ahead at the road and wished again that she could see those aura thingies.

---

As soon as they walked into the house, Xander set to looking up phone numbers and canceling his credit cards. He tried to close the bank account, but was informed that Anya had gotten there first. He sighed. So much for his savings.

Buffy headed off to find someone to tell the story of Xander's burning belongings to. She found all three girls in with Spike, Willow and Tara in chairs, Dawn lolling on the bed, reading magazines.

"Hey Sis," Dawn acknowledged her presence. "Didja get Xander's stuff already?"

Buffy grinned and sat on the bedside. "Hell no. When we got there, Anya had it all in a huge pile in the parking lot and was dancing around it while it burned." That got everyone's attention.

"Anya burned Xander's stuff?" Willow asked, wide-eyed. Buffy nodded, then looked forlorn.

"And Xander just laughed and said he got the only thing that mattered." The girls shared a collective sigh. Buffy frowned as she was kicked in the back. "Knock it off, Dawnie, you think its romantic too."

Dawn looked at her in confusion. "Knock what off?" Buffy was kicked again. But she was looking at Dawn. And Dawn didn't move. She turned her eyes to the other occupant of the bed. He lashed out again, his brow furrowed, and Buffy hopped off of the bed. As Dawn rolled off too, she ran to the doorway.

"Xander! Get up here now!" She hollered. Looking back, she made eye contact with bright, blue dazed eyes. "Spike! How are you feeling?" she stepped to his bedside then jumped back as he slammed himself against the headboard and went into game face.

Heavy footsteps hit the stairs at a run and Xander appeared in the doorway. His eyes went immediately to the bed and the vampire caught between cowering and growling. He took careful steps toward the bed, drawing Spike's eyes from the Slayer. "Spike?" He said soothingly. "It's okay. No one will hurt you. I promise. You're safe."

Spike stopped growling, but still clung to the headboard. Buffy stepped back further, and saw across the room that Willow and Tara were tugging Dawn back with them. Xander continued to advance on the bed. "Spike? Can you tell me what's wrong? Please, Wil, tell Xander what's wrong." Spike's game face melted away and he sat shivering at the head of the bed, looking terrified. His eyes held pleading and bewilderment, and Xander couldn't stand it.

He finished the stretch to the bed and sank down onto the mattress. He held out his arms like he would to a child and really wasn't surprised from Spike's expression when the vamp launched himself into those arms with a whimper. Xander adjusted them until Spike was pulled onto his lap. He began shushing the vamp using the same nonsense phrases Tara remembered from before.

Spike eventually calmed down enough to be released and he sat, cherub faced and animae eyed, watching the others watch him. "Spike can you tell us what's wrong?" Xander asked again. The vamp looked at him, registering his voice, but not replying. Xander tried again. "Can you tell us what happened?" The vamp cocked his head but still said nothing.

Tara knelt before the bed, playing on a hunch. "Spike, do you remember us?" A spark in his eyes. A question he could finally answer. He shook his head. "Do you remember who you are?" He shook his head again. Tara smiled and nodded. "That's okay. We just needed to know, alright?" Spike nodded back, pleased to have done something right.

---

Xander sat in horror, staring at the table. Spike had fallen back asleep, a restful sleep, not the coma like state he'd been in for the last two days. The inhabitants of the Summers house were now gathered around the kitchen table quietly wondering what the hell to do.

"The electricity must have scrambled his brain waves, right?" Buffy finally ventured. Willow nodded.

"It has to be. He didn't hit his head that hard when he landed. But what I'm really worried about is…" she hazarded a glance at Xander, who appeared lost in his own little world. "The chip." She finished in a near whisper.

Dawn looked horrified. "You think it shorted out?"

Willow shrugged. "It may have. Okay, it probably did, but what I'm more worried about it what if it melted into his gray matter? Destroyed some part of his brain?" Silence reigned as they pondered the implications of that.

"How could we find out?" Tara asked.

"We could get him a CAT scan," she chuckled wryly. "Oh, yes, Doctor. I know he has no pulse and no body heat, but could you please run him through your machine anyway?" She shook her head. "I really don't know."

---

"Spike? Wil, no, honey…don't' touch." Xander plucked the cross out from under Spike's inquisitive fingers. "Crosses hurt you. You understand?" Spike just gave him 'the look'. The girls said he should have it patented. It was a look that said, "no, actually I don't understand. But it's you that's telling me so it must be true." Xander sighed and gently patted Spike's shoulder.

The last week had been awful. Spike had started speaking in one-word sentences. Just enough to get across 'yes' 'no' and 'want'. The scoobies had to reteach Spike nearly everything else.

This is blood, Spike. You have to drink it. No, Spike. Don't spit it out. No, Spike. I don't want to share.

No, Spike. The mailman isn't trying to break into the house. No, Spike. Don't rip the nice mailman's throat out. He was only smiling, not baring his teeth at you.

Don't go into the sunlight, Spike. That one was actually met with something other than 'the look.' He'd gone back later to the window and tried to play in the dancing beams. When the first burn of the sun had scorched his hand, he'd run howling to Xander, hysterically chanting 'burn, burn, burn'.

After Xander had doctored him up and held him for nearly an hour, Spike turned to him seriously and shook his head. "Sunlight. Bad." Xander had tried not to laugh, and tried not to cry, and had praised Spike for realizing it himself.

Spike was also picking up some bad habits that Willow researched for Xander. Spike wanted to be held nearly all the time. He was constantly mouthing at Xander's neck, much to Buffy's dismay. Willow discovered that he might be associating Xander with his Sire. It was common for Sires to feed their Childer. That of course lead to the oft-repeated phrase: No, Spike. I'm not your Sire. I can't let you feed off of me like that.

Spike seemed crushed the first few times he heard it, but lately, appeared to be making an effort to change Xander's mind. Of course, he did this using other things associated with Sire's and Childer. He was trying to seduce Xander. If Xander were in the house, Spike was touching some part of him. Often naughtily.

Xander couldn't count the number of times he'd woken up with Spike plastered to his body, dropping tiny kisses up and down his chest, or laving his nipples with a cool tongue. Once, he'd woken up from an amazing dream of Spike's cool mouth and wicked tongue rasping over his cock to find Spike's cool mouth and wicked tongue rasping over his cock.

He threatened to make Spike sleep alone if he did it again. Spike pouted, sulked, gave him puppy-Spike eyes, but Xander held firm and in the end, Spike nodded sadly and lay back down, facing away from him.

After the week from hell, Xander decided that he needed to replace his things. Work was looming around the corner and he and Spike had been wearing the same clothes nearly every day. Willow had retrieved some clothes she'd borrowed from him and never returned. Giles had offered some of his as well, so they weren't going naked. But Xander needed to have something that belonged to him.

So, he planned a shopping trip. And he planned to take Spike with him.

---

Xander pushed the door open and held it for Spike. He'd tried to get the vamp to let him carry something but Spike only growled lowly at him and snatched the bags away. He directed the blonde into the kitchen and yelled for the girls. Spike arranged the chairs like Xander had described and waited quietly near the fridge. Xander had separated his and Spike's clothes from the surprises they'd purchased when the ladies of the house came down the stairs.

"I wanna see!" Dawn called, fighting Buffy to get through the kitchen door first. Xander grinned and waved his hands to the chairs.

"For your viewing pleasure, ladies all…a show worthy of Versace."

Buffy giggled, but sat anyway. "Do you even have a clue who Versace is?" Xander shrugged.

"Some dressmaker. I saw a bunch of Versace dresses on the front of a magazine in line at the grocery store one day." Buffy winced and waved Xander away.

"Hopeless. You're hopeless, Xander. Now…proceed with the gratuitous butt poses." Dawn howled in agreement causing Xander to blush even as he pulled Spike out of the room with their bags of clothes. For the next hour, he and Spike took turns parading through the kitchen showing off their new outfits.

Spike actually seemed to be getting into it. He had the faintest glimmer of a smile when Tara wolf whistled at him and gave his ass an extra wiggle when Willow yelled, "shake it Blondie."

Finally, Xander called the show quits when the girls demanded to see their underwear and Buffy and Dawn started chanting "thong, thong, thong." He piled the clothes back into the bags and beckoned Spike closer.

"Ready to show them their presents?" He asked. Spike's face lit up and he nodded. He handed the bag over to the blonde who took it very carefully and placed it on the table. Xander took a seat next to Dawn and waited. A brief look of panic set over his face as he saw Xander move away from him. Xander smiled encouragingly. "Go ahead. You picked them out. It's only right that you should give the stuff to them."

Xander turned to the girls. "We ran into this amazing glass blower in the mall. Spike was practically impossible to drag away from it." He grinned. "He stood there so long that the glass blower gave him a free demonstration. That was all it took. Spike begged to get you all thank you gifts for letting us stay here. He asked for each to be specially made for each of you."

Willow laughed. "He said all that, huh?"

Spike turned a tiny smile on her as Xander shrugged. "Okay, so it was more like…'presents…pause…thank you…pause…girls…pause…choose, inserting questioning tone and pointing to himself.' Then he poked around in the glassblowers stock until he saw something he liked and pointed saying each of your names." He looked at Spike, remembering how excited he'd acted when he found the perfect figurine for each girl.

"But I got what he meant." He said with a soft smile. "You just have to look beneath the surface and read between the lines."

The girls looked between Xander and Spike, one gazing in adoration, one ducking his head but returning the look anyway. Buffy sighed. ~Damn aura seeing people.~

Dawn was the first to break. "Show us the pressies!" She squealed. Xander pulled his gaze away from the blonde vamp reluctantly.

"Okay, Spike's gonna give you the gift and I'm going to try to explain why he chose it. I'm kinda going off of what he tried to say at the mall and how he's been acting since he woke up." He'd set it up this way, knowing that if Spike were the focus of the group, he'd retreat back into himself and wind up hiding in a corner.

Spike pulled out a large box and handed it to Willow with a shy smile. She took it from his hands, her face full of excitement. Spike backed quickly away and Xander began his description.

"Spike wouldn't put this down when he saw it. He just kept saying Willow. He thought it not only symbolized you, but would be functional." Xander shrugged. "Okay, so he didn't say functional, but he meant you could use it as well as look at it." Willow reverently unwrapped her gift and sat perfectly still, gazing in wonder at the piece in her lap.

"For crying out loud, Willow! Show us already!" Dawn whined.

"Dawn, be patient." Buffy corrected her sister, glad that someone else had broken before she did.

Willow lifted a delicate glass bowl out of her box. It was clear at the base and bled up to a rust color at the lip. Bare limbs from a willow tree graced its sides and the light shown through it as though the sun were shining into the forest of tree branches. She looked up at Spike in awe.

"I've never seen anything so beautiful, Spike. Thank you." She handed the bowl to Tara and beckoned Spike to her. He edged closer and leaned down as she crooked her finger. She placed a single light kiss on his cheek and smiled up at him. His eyes lit up. ~Like the light through the forest.~ She giggled slightly at her wax into melancholy and took back the bowl as Spike moved back to the table.

He pulled out a long slender box and handed it to Tara. She lifted the lid and gasped. "Oh, Goddess, Spike."

Xander leaned back, pleased with Tara's expression. "He chose that because it calmed him. Like you do. It made him feel peaceful and happy." Spike made a noise across the room and Xander glanced at him. He had a frown on his face and he seemed to be prompting Xander to say more. Xander looked confused for a moment, then mouthed 'oh! Sorry. "And it's pretty." Tara blushed, looked at Spike, who blushed and turned her attention to the wand nestled in the cotton.

She held it aloft and watched the amethyst crystals and silver piping sparkle against the clear glass rod. "It's gorgeous, Spike. Thank you so much." She too beckoned him over and he came more eagerly, now that he knew what his reward was to be. She kissed him on the cheek and he went happily back to the table.

He pulled out a small box. Xander grinned. "This isn't functional or gorgeous. It's too small to be an ornamental piece. But, Spike thought you could carry it with you on patrol so you could have something to make you smile if you get sad or lonely." Buffy took the box warily and eyed Spike. She could have sworn there was a twinkle in his gaze.

She opened it and laughed. "Oh, my god! It's Mr. Gordo ! Spike, it's perfect!" She held up a tiny figurine, barely two inches tall, of a frosted pink pig with tiny floppy ears and gems for eyes and hooves. He held a perfect little red heart in his hands and he sat on a beveled mirror.

Spike returned her smile, looking pleased with himself. He moved closer and leaned down expectantly. Buffy laughed, but gave him a sound kiss on the cheek. "I think you like that, Blondie." She added fondly. He shrugged and moved back to the table. He lifted out another large box and walked over to Dawn.

She bounced in her seat. "Ha! Buffy, mine is bigger."

Buffy snorted. "So. Mine is perfect. And portable. So nyah." She stuck her tongue out at her sister and clutched Mr. Gordo Jr. to her chest. Xander snickered.

"I don't think this needs any introduction, but Spike was drawn to it like a magnet. He kept saying 'pretty Dawn' when he was looking at it." Dawn tore into the box with a vengeance, slowing down when she reached the cotton padding. Tears came to her eyes and she covered her mouth.

She handed the box to Buffy and rose to her feet. She flung herself at Spike. He looked a bit like a wild-eyed deer at first, but settled into her embrace in a moment. "Thank you, Spike. I love it. I love you too." She whispered and pulled away to kiss him on the cheek.

Buffy held Dawn's gift up for the others to see. It was nearly 8 inches tall. On a coned base sat a melded sun and moon. The sun had golden tinged flames shooting off of it. The other side, the moon, was frosted into a quarter moon and dotted with glassy stars.

"It's dawn ," Tara breathed. "The union of night and day. Oh, Spike, that's amazing." Spike smiled in her direction over his armful of teary-eyed teenager. Spike pulled away gently and Dawn went back to her seat to stroke her gift reverently.

"Well, there you are, ladies. Hope you liked the…what Spike?" Xander stopped mid sentence as Spike reached into the bag and pulled out another box. Spike knelt at Xander's feet and held the box out to him. Xander took it automatically. "What is this?" Spike pointed from the box to Xander and sat back on his heels.

"Well, open the damn thing!" Buffy said impatiently.

"Now, Buffy, be patient." Dawn snarked back at her with a grin. Buffy stuck her tongue out at her sister. Xander opened the box and lifted out a glass anchor , trimmed in gold, with a golden rope twisting around it.

"Wow, Spike," he smiled. "It's beautiful. Thank you." Spike looked expectantly at him. Xander faltered. The blonde obviously wanted him to make a connection, but he wasn't getting it. What was it about him that reminded Spike of the ocean? Spike looked at Tara pleadingly. She furrowed her brow, then her face lit up.

"Oh, Xander, don't you get it?" She breathed.

"Uh, obviously not. Help me out here?" He asked, nervously.

"Xander, what is an anchor used for?"

"Umm…to hold ships still?" He said cautiously. Tara nodded encouragingly. "So they don't drift away…" he slowed down and stared at the piece, "so they don't drift and lose themselves." He looked up at Spike, who smiled in satisfaction. "Is that what I am, Wil? Your anchor?" Spike nodded and crawled up into Xander's lap, displacing the glass gift. Buffy reached out to save it as Spike wrapped his arms around Xander's neck.

Spike nuzzled Xander's neck and sighed happily. Xander blinked away tears and clutched his vampire closer. "Thank you,Wil." He whispered. Spike sat up, wicked smile on his face, and presented his cheek. Xander grinned. "Okay, I guess you deserve a thank you kiss." His eyes closed as his lips moved to Spike's cheek. When they got there, however, what they found was two more lips, soft, pliant, cool, hungry.

Spike nibbled on Xander's lower lip, tracing its outline with his tongue. Then he pulled away shyly and hopped out of the brunette's lap. He gathered up the bags of clothes and headed upstairs. Xander sat shell-shocked. Buffy leaned over and placed a finger under his chin, pushing his jaw back up.

"Unless you'd like Spike to come back down and stick something in there, I suggest you close it and go help him unpack your clothes." She said pointedly. Xander looked from her to Dawn. From Dawn to Willow, then Tara and back to Buffy. He stood and bolted out of the room, laughter followed him.

Chapter Three

By the time the boys came back downstairs the girls were planning dinner. Tara and Dawn tore up lettuce and cut veggies for salad and Willow stirred the no bake cheesecake. Buffy had just finished making hamburger patties and was heating up the pan. Xander and Spike came in, not holding hands, but walking close enough that their shoulders brushed.

"Hey guys." Buffy called with a smile. "Xander, can you get the dishes down?" Xander nodded and steered his charge to a chair at the table before getting into the cupboard. Buffy dropped several patties in the pan and stood waiting to push them around.

Tara was explaining the intricacies of tearing lettuce instead of cutting it when the first whimper came. Tara's voice ground to a stop and she looked around the table, curious. Another whimper. "Spike? Are you okay?" She asked. Spike covered his face with his hands, gasping through his mouth. Xander dropped the plates he was carrying onto the counter and made a beeline for his vampire.

"Spike? Wil, honey, what's wrong?" Spike looked helplessly up at Xander, his hands fluttering frantically at his throat. "Spike, you have to tell us what's wrong. We can't do anything if we don't know!" Xander began to panic when Spike started dry heaving. Spike tried to push away from the table but the chair leg got stuck on the table leg. His whimpers turned desperate.

Xander jerked the chair out from under the table and Spike was off like a shot. He pushed past Willow and Dawn and flung the kitchen door open. Xander raced after him, followed by the others. Spike had made it about five feet off of the steps before falling to his knees and throwing up the blood he'd consumed that day.

Xander dropped to his knees and put an arm around the gagging vampire. "Spike, sweetie, what is it?" He begged. Spike sat back and covered his nose with the back of his hand. He rocked on his heels.

"Burn." He croaked.

Xander looked confused. "Burn? Something was burning?"

"Was Buffy burning the burgers?" Dawn asked, kneeling on the other side of the blonde.

Spike shook his head and looked between the two of them, tears filling his eyes. "Burn." He whispered again.

"Spike, what was burning?" Xander asked again.

Tara made a little gasp and covered her own mouth. "Oh, Goddess. Nothing was burning, Xander. Not now. But it did. It did burn, right Spike?" Spike nodded from his seat in the grass.

"Spike." He agreed. "Burn."

Xander had to bite his tongue to keep from gagging himself. "The smell of the burgers, Spike. Did they remind you of when you were burned? When the power line hit the water?" Spike nodded vigorously. Xander looked back at the girls, anguish on his face. Buffy turned and ran back into the kitchen.

By the time he'd gotten Spike to his feet and back onto the back steps, Buffy had come back out. "I threw the meat out into the garbage in the front." She said quietly. "I turned the fan on, too. But Spike may be more comfortable eating in the living room. We're having salad, oven-baked fries and cheesecake for dinner." She added with an uptilted chin.

Willow hugged Buffy and pulled her inside ahead of an appreciative Xander and a shaky Spike.

---

The rest of dinner went remarkably well considering the precursor. Unfortunately, that was the last thing to go right that day. Once Spike and Xander were ensconced in their room, Spike began the seduction scene again. Xander had just shucked his jeans and turned to lay them on the chair when he was knocked onto his ass on the bed.

Cool hands scrabbled at Xander's boxers, tugging them from his hips, exposing him to the questing lips hovering over him. Xander gasped and his hips shot up off of the bed as Spike's insistent mouth closed over his hardening cock. Pleasure shot straight to his brain and he found his hands were moving of their own volition to Spike's head. He couldn't guarantee they were headed there to pull the blonde away.

"Spike, please…stop," he moaned. He was afraid Spike was going to suck his will to say no right out of his dick. "I mean it, stop." Spike hummed against his erection and Xander saw stars. He felt his hands moving again. "Spike. Stop. Now. If you don't quit, I'm sleeping on the couch downstairs for the rest of the week."

He nearly whimpered aloud when the talented lips reluctantly turned loose of his hardened flesh. He reached down and pulled his boxers up with a swift jerk, pulling several hairs in the process. The pain brought him back to himself. He sat up to find Spike bowed at his feet, looking up at him with such sadness and desperation.

"Please?" Spike whispered. "Sire? Claim?" He held out a hand entreatingly.

"I'm sorry, Spike. I'm not your Sire." Xander said gently. "I don't know how to claim you. I can't."

Tears threatened to spill from azure eyes and a protruding lip quivered. "Sire? Please? Claim?" Xander shook his head sadly. One single tear rolled down Spike's porcelain white skin. He ducked his head and slowly crawled to the corner by the closet, where he curled into a fetal position. Xander could see the silent sobs wracking his body from the bed.

He launched off of the bed and knelt at Spike's side. "Spike, sweetie, please. Come back to bed." Spike didn't act like he'd even heard Xander. That in itself was strange as the vampire was usually so in tune with what Xander was feeling that it was scary. "Spike, it's cold down here. The floor is really hard. Please come back to bed. Let me hold you." He could see the slow but sure shake of Spike's head.

He sighed. ~Way to fuck it up, Harris.~ He moved back to the bed and pulled a blanket off of it. He tried several times to tuck it around Spike's shoulders but the vamp threw it back off each time before curling back into a ball. "Not worthy." He whispered the last time. Xander bit his lip hard enough to draw blood at the anguished sound of those two words.

Spike suddenly uncurled and bolted for the door. Xander followed a second or two later and watched Spike crawl into the armchair in the living room, wrapping his arms around the throw pillow. Xander stood for long minutes watching the miserable vampire before making his way back upstairs. He climbed into the bed, which was suddenly very large and very lonely. And he lay awake staring at the ceiling until the sun lightened the room.

---

When he heard the girls begin to move around downstairs, he threw on his clothes from yesterday and made his way downstairs. He saw Spike, still in the armchair, and Willow kneeling next to him.

"Spike, where's Xander, honey?…Spike? Are you alright?…Honey, are you hungry?…Spike?"

"He slept down here last night, Wills." Xander croaked, then winced at the sound of his own voice. Willow looked up at him and her jaw dropped in shock.

"Goddess, what happened to you? You look like shit!" Xander smiled slightly. Willow blushed and tried again. "I mean, you look like you haven't slept."

"I haven't."

"You look like you spent all night worrying and grinding your head into the pillow."

"I did."

"And aren't those the same clothes you wore yesterday?"

"Yeah."

Willow's expression softened as she looked between the vampire and man. "Xan, what happened."

Xander came down the rest of the stairs and dropped onto the couch, his gaze resting on the blonde vamp who looked as though he hadn't moved all night. "He tried it again."

Willow frowned. "The 'seduce Xander' thing?"

Xander laughed without humor. "Oh, hell yeah. Never let it be said that the Zeppo has no self-control, cause Lordy did I exercise it last night. He kept asking me to claim him and calling me Sire." Xander shrugged helplessly. "I'm not his Sire. And I don't know how to claim him, Wills. I don't know that he would even want that if he were ever to get back to normal. I don't know how claims work."

He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "He crawled…crawled, Will…into the corner and cried. When I tried to talk to him he called himself 'not worthy'. Then he ran down here and I don't think he's moved."

Willow tucked a finger under Spike's chin and looked into the vacant blue eyes. "Spike, Xander's here. Can you wake up a bit for Xander?" A spark came into his eyes and they focused on Willow.

"Sire?" He murmured.

Xander sighed. Willow frowned. "No, not your Sire. Just Xander."

"Xander. Sire. Claim?" Spike pleaded. Willow shook her head.

"I'm sorry, Spike. He can't." Spike's head dropped back to the pillow and Willow watched the light go out of them again. She stood and looked between the two men again. "This isn't good."

Xander snorted. "Way to understate there, Wills."

Willow glared at him. "Stop being an ass, Xander. This is way beyond what I know. I'm calling Giles." Xander just lay on the couch watching Willow punch buttons on the phone. A few minutes later and she dropped the phone back into the cradle. "Giles is on his way."

"Oh, goody. Someone else who'll know I have a vampire refusing to sleep, eat, or remain sane unless I let him suck my dick."

Willow stepped up to his knees, snatched a hank of hair and jerked. Hard. He stared up at her in astonishment. "I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that filth come out of your mouth, Alexander Harris." She glared. "I don't know what a claim is either. But I'm guessing it means that he wants to belong to you somehow. Right now, I think you should stop whining about how crappy this is and start thinking about how to make Spike better. I'd also try to remember that I'm not the only one in this and that I have other people to lean on. Oh, and I'd ponder for a bit on how much I love him and then spend the rest of the day wondering how I could say such an awful thing about him."

Her eyes narrowed in anger. "I'm going into the kitchen and start breakfast. I'll have someone bring yours out to you. I hope you're ready to start thinking up a plan when Giles gets here."

---

Xander spent the next few hours staring at Spike. Thinking how badly hurt Spike was when Xander told him no last night. Wondering why. Remembering how much he loved him. And beating himself up for saying such shit about him. Every passing second he hurt more for the wounded vampire. And every time he started asking 'why is this happening to me' he'd look at the statue-still vampire huddled in the chair and change his question to 'why is this happening to Spike?'

He didn't touch the plate Buffy brought in to him. Didn't even take his eyes off of Spike. When the doorbell rang, he didn't move. Finally, Dawn bounced out of the kitchen to answer it. Giles stepped in, removing his coat. He took one look at Xander watching Spike do nothing, and headed for the kitchen.

Xander was okay with that. Willow knew all the dirty details. Let her fill Giles in. He'd just sit here, watching his vampire. By the time Giles came back out, Xander had zoned out. He wasn't asleep, but neither was he focusing on anything in the room but Spike. Giles sat across from him and tried to speak to him.

Nothing.

He changed tactics and tried to get Spike's attention.

Nothing.

Giles looked up at the girls. "Call Angel."

Chapter Four

Xander snapped out of the trance he'd put himself in. Though he'd been staring at Spike for hours, Xander still needed to check on him now that he felt coherent again. He heard voices in the kitchen, female and male and he perked his ears up long enough to hear the accent. ~Giles is here. Wonder when that happened?~

He looked back at Spike.

Still hadn't moved.

He set his jaw and stood.

Nothing.

~Fuck it.~ He walked to the chair and scooped his vampire up, cradling him to his chest.

No response.

Wait!

Spike turned his head a minute inch and nuzzled Xander's neck. Relief washed through the human and he sat back on the couch with Spike in his arms. He lost track of how long he sat, cuddling the blonde, dropping soft kisses on his head. He was startled at the sound of knocking on the front door. ~Who could it be? Everyone's here.~

Buffy came out of the kitchen, smiling when she saw Xander holding Spike. She opened the door and stepped back. "Come in, Angel."

---

Angel moved into the living room, after a brief nod at Buffy, he had eyes only for his small, frail-looking Childe and the dark-haired man wrapped around him. He sat in the chair recently vacated by his Childe and absorbed the non-verbal signals being given off by both men.

Spike was plastered to Xander's neck, his lips having found the reassuring pulse located there. His hands were curled into Xander's shirt, clutching with desperation. Xander's arms were coiled around the vampire's back and he had his lips and nose buried in the soft blonde curls on top of Spike's head. He was watching Angel as one would watch a particularly poisonous snake; warily and with fear tinged bravado.

His body language was practically screaming, "Don't touch me or mine." Angel cleared his throat and tried a smile.

"Xander," He began softly, "Giles seems to think I might be able to help you with Spike." Xander raised an eyebrow, an expression that tugged at Angel's heart. Did the boy know that he'd picked up Spike's quirks?

"How can you help?" Xander demanded quietly, so not to disturb Spike.

"I think I might be able to reach him. We have quite the history together." ~Well, that was just about the stupidest thing I could have said.~ Angel berated himself as Xander's arms tightened and the eyebrow dropped into a glare. "Spike knows me. I'm his Sire. He is bound to me." The glare got deeper. "His demon knows that he belongs to me even if he doesn't remember it."

Xander carefully set Spike down on the couch next to him, glancing worriedly at him when the vamp let out a tiny whimper. But, Spike settled into the pillows and Xander gave his attention back to Angel.

"Spike does not 'belong' to anyone." He growled.

Angel held up his hands in a gesture of peace. "I just meant that his demon knows that I am his Sire. The demon is bound to my own in a way because I created him." Xander didn't stop glaring. Nor did he move away. He just gestured for Angel to show him. Xander could hear the others gathering behind him. Buffy must have let them know that a testosterone war was commencing in her living room.

Angel stood over Spike's prone form. "William. William, your Sire demands your presence." He saw an eye flicker, nothing more. "William. You will wake now. I require you, boy." A twitch from the blonde vamp, a visible tensing of the dark haired man. He sighed inwardly. ~Wil, m'boy, why do you always have to do things the hard way?~

He shifted into game face and bit the inside of his wrist. In one swift movement, he snatched Spike's head up by his hair and thrust his wrist into his face. "William, you will obey or punishment will follow!" He roared.

He wasn't sure the result had anything to do with his authority as Sire, really. He only knew that Spike's terrified blue eyes snapped open accompanied by a frightened whimper. Xander returned Angel's roar with one of his own and slammed him, knocking Angel over the coffee table and onto his ass on the floor.

Feminine shrieks brought his attention to the swarm of bodies trying to tear an enraged Xander from his chest. He could see a flash of red hair, a blonde ponytail, hear a cultured British voice saying something cultured British voices never say, and then they were gone. Xander was hauled off of him but the boy's human hands were replaced by much stronger hands…with much sharper nails…attached to a blonde man in game face seemingly determined to rip Angel's throat out.

It was all he could do to keep Spike's teeth from his flesh, his nails raked deep furrows down Angel's face and sides. He was a bit amazed that the vamp was this strong after being hurt so badly.

---

"For fuck's sake, Xander! Get him off of Angel! He's crazed!" Buffy screamed, throwing herself back into the fray after picking herself up off of the floor where Spike had thrown her. Xander entertained the thought of letting Spike rip his Sire into shreds, but then decided they may need the bastard later. He sighed and waded in himself.

"Spike! Spike, let go…Come on, Spike! Wil? Wil, please let go. Let him up. Please, Wil? Baby, come on, come back to me." The battle was over as quickly as it had begun. Spike leaped to his feet, shifting out of game face, and lunged for Xander. He stood in the circle of Xander's arms, shaking and sucking gently on the pulse point in the boy's throat.

Xander rocked him, holding him close and whispering shushing sounds into his ear while shooting hate filled daggers at Angel. Angel let Buffy help him up and place him on the couch. Tara appeared from nowhere and presented the Slayer with a first aid kit that she proceeded to use on the older vamp as he watched his Childe and his Childe's mate comfort each other.

He wondered how Buffy would take it; Spike and Xander being mated. Because they were. Only the formality of a claim was left to perform. A Childe never touched his Sire in anger. With intent to kill. And never because of a mere human. Angel was the exception because of his soul. It seemed that William was the exception because he loved and was loved by the fiercely protective and fiery-eyed human male in his arms.

Eventually, Childe and mate made their way back to the couch. Xander pulled Spike up onto his lap and clutched him tightly to his chest. He and Angel continued to exchange unspoken messages, sent between equally dark eyes. Xander threatened Angel should he lay another finger on his vampire. Angel asked to be given a chance to help his Childe. Neither paid any attention to the rest of the gang as they found places to sit, well away from in-between the two men.

In due time, Xander remembered Angel had come to help and tried to bank the fire in his gut. If it would help Spike, he could put up with Angel. For a while. A short while. "So, Deadboy. What else do you have for us?" He asked harshly.

"Xander!" Buffy exclaimed in exasperation. Angel held up a hand.

"No. It's okay. It's more than okay, actually." He answered quietly. "I'm glad that Xander is so protective. It helps a lot, because I'm pretty sure Xander is the key to pulling Spike out of this."

Xander narrowed his eyes. "How?"

Angel sat back. "Giles has told me everything you've shared with them. From what it looks like to me, Spike thinks you don't want him." Xander's jaw clenched tightly, but his grip on Spike gentled.

"That's bullshit. He knows I care about him."

Angel sighed. "Caring about him is all well and good for a human. But Spike is a vampire and as such has different levels of needs. He's treating you like a Sire. You matter more to him at this point than his own existence does. He can't help it. He seems to have reverted to fledgling in some ways." He noted Xander's jaw unclenched and he tilted his head as he considered Angel's words.

"What ways?"

"Well, as a Sire, you provide protection, shelter, and food until they can hunt without putting themselves in danger…"

"I do all of that." Xander interrupted.

"You do all of that. Yes." Angel agreed. "And that is probably why he sees you as his Sire. But a Sire also does other things. A Sire provides comfort, a safe haven…love…after a fashion."

Xander frowned. "But, he has those things too."

Angel shook his head. "You need to prove it to him in a way his demon can understand."

"And how is that?" Xander growled.

"Claim him."

Silence.

"Umm…what does that include exactly?" Willow asked nervously.

"You can do it one of two ways, though doing both is the preferred manner." ~This is going to go over like a ton of bricks.~ "You can claim with blood or sex."

More silence.

"Can I just say, eww?" Buffy interjected.

Giles looked at her disapprovingly and she blushed. Angel leaned forward again. "The part of him that's human knows you care for him. It knows that he belongs to you. The demon hasn't figured it out yet. It doesn't get that being nice and loving to Spike means he belongs to you. It expects to be dominated. It wants to be dominated. I think the demon is what is keeping Spike practically incoherent. It won't let his body heal correctly because it can't see a reason for it to do so."

Xander blinked. "You want me to dominate Spike's demon."

"Yes."

"In blood."

"Yes. You need to mark him with a bite. You need to taste his blood and allow him to taste yours."

Xander opened his mouth to say something, and then quickly closed it. Giles spoke up for him. "But with Spike not being…all together…what if he tries to drain Xander?"

Angel sat back again. "He won't. It's ingrained into his demon. You obey your Sire in all things. When he allows you to feed from him, you take only as much as he allows and no more. All Xander has to do is say stop. Or enough. Or even tug on Spike's head a bit. He'll stop."

"But I'm not his Sire!" Xander shot at him.

"He thinks you are. It doesn't matter what you think. Only him. But if you don't want to claim in blood, you can claim in sex." The girls blushed and Giles fidgeted. "You just have to take control. Be the dominant one. Take the lead."

Xander sputtered. "Okay. I'm not all into the draining me idea, but I know for a fact that I am not having sex with Spike."

Angel looked at him sadly. "The claim is bigger than sex, Xander. The sex is just a pleasant side effect. Sex is sex. It is an expression of affection at best. Claiming through sex is…well, more. I've had sex with Spike plenty of times, but the one time I claimed him…" He shuddered slightly, his eyes drifting closed in remembrance. He was brought back to reality by the gasps and squeaks his statement brought forth.

Giles seemed not to be surprised at all, just deep in thought. Tara blushed and refused to make eye contact. Willow gaped, looking like she wanted to pummel him with questions. Buffy looked shocked/betrayed/squicked. Dawn…sweet accepting Dawn. He wanted to laugh at the wicked grin that appeared on her face. He had to raise his hand to cover his mouth when she cut her eyes at her sister then Spike and gave him a raised eyebrow.

He dared to look back at Xander. ~Hmmm. Mental note. Never tell one half of a mated pair you had sex with his other half.~ Xander looked ready to kill. His jaw was clenched again and could looks kill, Angel was sure his stint in hell would have been more pleasant than what Xander was planning for him.

"I'm sorry." He said into the heavy silence. "But if we are going to get Spike any better, you might have to hear some unpleasant things."

"Hear, fine. Do? No." Xander growled.

Angel stood in anger. "Someone has to claim him, dammit! He's floundering! He needs to be anchored to someone." He looked pointedly at Xander. "If you won't do it, then someone else will have to."

Xander eased Spike off his lap again and stood nose to nose with the older vampire. "And are you suggesting you be the one to claim him…again?" He snarled.

Angel leaned in; hoping what he was going to do was worth it. "I'd claim in an instant, Harris." He whispered with a smirk. "I've been waiting for decades to make my Childe mine again. The things that boy can do with his tongue…"

Buffy sailed out of nowhere and slammed Angel to the ground just as Xander reached for a stake. Willow and Giles each grabbed one of Xander's arms and held him, hoping he loved them enough not to take them out before going after Angel.

Dawn stood up, pissed, and shouted, "Hello? People! Has anyone thought to ask Spike who he wants to have chomp on him and screw him silly?" Everyone ceased movement.

"Dawn, language! But I agree with you." Buffy said from her place on Angel's chest. "Why don't you ask Spike who he wants to belong to?"

Xander shook off Willow and Giles arms and glared at Angel. "Fine. Let's do that."

Angel rose to his feet and nodded. "Fine." He turned to the figure curled on the couch watching them with terrified eyes. "William," He said softly. "You need to choose, Childe. Choose whom you will belong to."

Xander glared at him again at the possessive tone in his voice, but his expression faded into one of loving warmth as he took in Spike's frightened pose. "It's okay, baby." He said soothingly. "It's okay whoever you choose. We just want to get you better."

Spike eased himself to the edge of the couch and tentatively stood. He looked between the two brunettes, feeling the tension radiating from them like a physical field. He sniffed. The one on the right smelled familiar. He brought to mind warm nights, warmer blood. The man also brought the sense of loss. Sadness. Anger. There was someone else…He struggled to remember, to see the elusive figure as it twirled around wildly, face to the sky.

He looked to the man on the right. Safety. Comfort. Warmth. Belonging. Love. He searched his malfunctioning memory for any unhappy memories of the man. All he could find was worry, longing.

He could feel a corporeal connection with the one on the right. He didn't share that one with the one on the left. But there was something else. He couldn't put a name to it. He frowned in frustration as he struggled to identify it. He sifted though his broken memories again. He remembered the feeling of flying, realizing he was held tenderly in strong arms. He could almost hear the words spoken to him.

Shouting. Anger wafting through the air. Then he was flying again. Same arms. Same tender care. He remembered the man being with someone else. Someone who hated him. Someone…

He cocked his head and looked at the man on the right. ~He left me.~ Spike didn't know when, nor why. Only that the man deserted him when he needed him. He looked to the man on the left. ~He left…for me.~ Once again, he didn't really remember the circumstances, only that when offered a choice…he chose Spike.

Mind made up, Spike moved toward Xander.

"Sire?" He whispered.

Xander felt his eyes stinging.

"Sire? Claim?" Spike took the final step forward and buried his face in Xander's shirt, feeling safe, warm, loved…chosen as Xander's arms closed around him. Xander shut his eyes against the rest of the room. He nuzzled the untidy curls and breathed deeply of the scent that was purely Spike.

~He chose me.~ Xander smiled into the vampire's hair, trying not to cry. ~He actually chose me.~

Angel had known whom Spike would choose from the second he saw them wrapped up in each other. But he was glad that now Xander knew it. He couldn't help the twinge of jealousy that went through him at the sight of someone else holding his boy. But, he just smiled and herded the others into the kitchen to give the men a moment of privacy.

Unknown minutes later, Xander pulled his head away and looked down at Spike. "Wanna go upstairs, baby?" He whispered. Spike nodded and allowed Xander to lead him to their room.

After making sure Spike was comfortable, tucked in and warm, Xander shucked down to his boxers and climbed in as well. He took the vamp in his arms and pulled him close. "I'm so sorry for making you think I didn't want you, Spike." He said into the darkness. "You're the most important thing in the world to me." He squeezed his eyes shut. "And if you need me to claim you, then I guess that's what we're gonna do."

Spike sat up and Xander could see him looking quizzically at him in the soft moonlight that crept through the window. ~Gotta remember to shut that before morning.~

"Sire?" Spike asked.

Xander smiled. Nodded. "Yes, Spike. I'll be your Sire. In any way you need me to be." ~Please, God. Let me be able to do this.~ He tilted his head to the side and drew Spike's face down to the juncture of his neck. The vampire gently rubbed his face over the tender skin, dropping tiny kisses and licks as he went.

Xander shivered at the cool lips and tongue caressing his flesh. He threaded his fingers through Spike's curls and gasped as blunt teeth nibbled. Spike laved his chosen area carefully; making sure every square millimeter had his attention. Xander could feel his cock begin to stir and doubt flared to life again.

Spike could smell the fear as it bled through the pleasure. He looked up at his human, a worried look on his face. Xander smiled wanly. "Sorry, baby. It's not the bite. I'm okay with the bite. Really." Spike looked as though he didn't believe him. Then the vamp brushed his leg against Xander's erection, causing the man to jerk and gasp. Spike seemed to understand because he placed a gentle but brief kiss on Xander's lips and went back to his perusal of Xander's neck.

Soon, Xander was so focused on the feelings Spike was evoking by his careful scrutiny that he stopped thinking and just let himself feel. Just as he thought Spike wasn't going to bite him tonight, he felt tiny pinpricks against his skin. His mind told him…run! Vampire! Danger, danger! His body? It begged…more, please more.

He chose to listen to his body and arched into the pain as fangs pierced his neck. There was a deep burn as Spike's teeth sank into muscle, then the vamp began delicately sipping from him and the burn vanished in a bloody, pleasure-filled haze. He had a sudden thought that he just might actually die from this. He didn't think he would be able to make Spike stop. The feeling of the vampire drinking from him…needing his blood, his life…it was too heady.

But Spike stopped anyway. Xander whimpered slightly in protest, but Spike just lapped at the wounds on his neck and then snuggled down onto Xander's chest. "Sire." He muttered happily, slipping into slumber as the heartbeat of his Sire reassured him with its steady rhythm.

Xander snuggled closer to his vampire and fell asleep thinking how he could mark Spike without hurting him.

---

Xander woke to a wandering hand mapping out his chest. He smiled and caught the hand with his own. As he blinked sleepy eyes at Spike, the vampire cringed. Xander sat up. "What's wrong, Spike?" Spike held up their twined hands and shook his head. He reached out as if to touch Xander with his other hand, then jerked it away and shook his head again.

Xander winced. "Oh, baby, what did I do to you?" He whispered. He smiled reassuringly at the vampire. "It's okay, Spike. Having Angel explain what was going on with you helped." He grinned wryly. "Actually, having Angel threaten to claim you if I didn't helped the most. I won't give you up."

Spike curled back against Xander's side, the worry gone from his eyes. Xander placed the vampire's hand back on his chest and raked Spike's fingers over a nipple. Xander groaned at the jolt of pleasure and led Spike's hand over to the other one to duplicate the feeling.

Once the blonde realized Xander wasn't going to shove him out of bed like yesterday, he became bolder. His hand slid down Xander's chest, following the dark patch of hair into the man's boxers. Xander hissed when Spike's cool hand wrapped around his stiffening cock.

With a growl, he flipped them over and pinned Spike to the mattress. The blonde looked up at him without fear. All Xander could see in his blue, blue eyes was pleasure and anticipation. He quickly divested Spike of his boxers and sat up to look at his vampire. "Gods, Spike. You're gorgeous." He whispered reverently, ghosting a hand down the pale flesh.

He followed his hand with his lips, marking the vampire every few inches with a biting, bruising kiss. Spike whimpered and arched into Xander's mouth. "I'm supposed to claim you." He murmured against Spike's skin. Spike whined and nodded. "So, does that mean I have to take you hard, or just take you so that you know you're mine?"

He glanced up to see Spike's answer but the blonde had his eyes closed and his mouth open in a silent plea. Xander smiled. "How about a little of both?" He swooped down and took the vamp's cock into his mouth, throating him. Spike howled and grasped the top of the headboard as his body rocketed off of the bed.

~Hey, not too shabby for the first time I've ever had dick in my mouth.~ Just thinking that made Xander grow harder. He suckled Spike, massaging his sac with one hand and tickling his perineum with the other. He heard Spike's head thrashing back and forth and little whimpering grunts issued at each new addition.

He could feel Spike's balls tightening up and he had a brief moment of panic as he realized he was about to have another man's cum in his mouth. Then it was too late and Spike was thrusting into his mouth even as his seed spurted down Xander's throat. Xander closed his lips around the shaft so as to not dribble. He tentatively allowed himself to analyze the liquid filling his mouth.

Cool, salty, not as bad as he'd imagined. But best of all, it tasted like Spike. He swallowed and used his tongue to clean up any remaining drips, then crawled back up the vampire's body. He nibbled on Spike's lips until the blonde opened them for him. Xander shared this new wonderful taste with his lover. Spike seemed very appreciative, sucking on Xander's tongue to glean every bit of taste from the human's mouth.

Xander sat up and smiled wickedly. "Well, baby, you ready to be claimed?" Spike shuddered and his cock twitched back to life. Xander reached for the only bottle on the end table slippery enough to do the job. As he popped the lid he grinned. He'd never have another sunburn without remembering Spike laid out before him like a sacrificial virgin, waiting to have Xander prepare him with aloe vera.

Xander eased one slickened finger into the vampire's hole, gasping a bit at the tightness. After another moment, he added a second and began pumping them gently. As he pushed in, he ran his fingers over a nubbin of flesh. He stopped, terrified of hurting the blonde, when Spike screamed.

"Oh, gods, baby…what did I do? I'm so sorry!" He yanked his fingers out of Spike's ass and looked up to stare into Spike's eyes. Eyes that took a moment to unglazed, only to look at Xander in disappointment. He whimpered and tugged Xander's hand back down between his legs. Xander frowned. "Was that a good scream, then?" He asked. Spike nodded vigorously.

Only slightly reassured, Xander cautiously re-entered the vamp. This time he searched for the spot tentatively, touching it only slightly this time. Spike still moaned and shoved himself down onto Xander's fingers. Gaining confidence, Xander began to thrust in earnest, actively seeking to hit that spot each time.

Just watching Spike writhe around on his fingers, pale porcelain against his own tanned skin, was causing his stiffened cock to ache. Giving into temptation, he pulled his fingers out…much to the vampire's displeasure…and lifted Spike's knees. He loosed one hand to guide him into Spike's slick hole, then grasped the vampire's leg again as he thrust in; sinking into Spike until his balls slapped against the blonde's ass.

Spike moaned low in his throat. Xander shuddered at the feel of cool walls clutching him, holding him, drawing him deeper. "Spike, look at me." He demanded hoarsely. Blue eyes met his. "Watch me, baby. Tell me if I hurt you." Spike nodded and wrapped his legs around Xander's waist. "Is this what you wanted, Spike?" He began thrusting, pulling out until only the head was left in Spike's ass and then slamming home.

"Is this how your demon wants to be claimed? To be owned? Is this how you want me to make you belong to me?" He barely recognized his voice, raspy with emotion and pleasure. Only Spike's whimpering and eye contact kept him grounded enough to remember to acknowledge to the demon that this was indeed a claim.

"You do, you know. You always have. You're mine, Spike. Mine, William. All mine." Spike's eyes began to bleed into gold and Xander smiled. "Yeah, let it go, baby. Let the demon out to play so he can see first hand who he belongs to now." Ridges formed and fangs elongated.

Xander hadn't thought he could be more excited, but seeing the true face of the vampire below him…knowing that, as far as the demon was concerned, it belonged to Xander…it was enough to send telltale tingles through Xander's body. "I'm gonna come, Spike." He whispered. "Come with me?" He didn't know if it was a request or an order. Thankfully, it didn't matter.

As he felt himself let go, he leaned forward and latched onto Spike's neck. With a ferocity that surprised him, he bit down. He could taste the blood welling into his mouth, feel the power in it. Spike screamed again and clenched so tightly onto Xander's cock that the human saw stars. He vaguely recognized the feel of cool liquid spurting out between them.

Still worrying his bite mark, he reached up and tugged Spike's head down to his own neck. Without hesitation, Spike bit down into the marks he'd made the night before. Finally, Xander lifted his head and licked the jagged gashes his teeth had made in the perfect, pale flesh. Spike retracted his fangs and licked Xander's holes closed as well.

With a sigh, Xander pulled Spike on top of him and wrapped arms and legs around the smaller vampire. Spike smiled shyly and Xander had to grin. "So, baby…how do you like being mine?"

---

Angel flinched at the sound of his Childe howling in pleasure. On one hand, he was thrilled that Xander had decided to take his advice and do what Spike needed to have him do. On the other hand? He squeezed his eyes shut at the memories of hearing the boy make those same sounds because of something Angel had done.

With a sigh, he rolled over and picked up the phone from its spot next to the couch. He dialed a number from memory and waited for the other end to pick up. "Yeah. It's Angel. I need you to locate someone for me…"

Chapter Five

The next two days went by in relative peace. Angel said he had to wait for an answer to his phone calls so Buffy let him stay on the couch. It made for a few tense moments, especially when Buffy came downstairs in her long t-shirt, yawning and rubbing her eyes. She'd forgotten Angel was there until they met face to face in the kitchen doorway. They stared like deer in headlights, then Angel turned back into the kitchen and Buffy turned tail and raced back to her room.

Willow, Tara and Giles spent most of their time researching spells, microchips and brain damage in books and on the computer. Dawn made a point to follow Angel around giving him pointed looks and innuendo-ing his every comment about Buffy and Spike. Angel thought it was amusing at first, until Dawn came out and asked him who was better in bed? Her sister or Spike? He avoided both Summers women after that, practically living on the phone.

He never said names, never gave descriptions. The people he called sometimes spoke English, sometimes not. Giles was sure he heard Angel speaking at least two different demonic languages. And then there were Spike and Xander. Now that Spike was allowed to touch Xander 'like that,' there wasn't a point that the two men were in the same room that they weren't touching or cuddling. Spike's ass never saw the sofa or the floor or even a chair. The only place he would sit was on Xander's lap. It was convenient that Xander wasn't about to complain.

Spike also began eating again. Willingly. All Xander had to do was hold up a bag and say please. Spike was at his side in an instant, drinking every bit Xander put in front of him. But the most wonderful part was when Spike began speaking in sentences that were more than one word long. Granted, he didn't turn into a motor mouth, but he usually used a noun followed by a verb. Sometimes, if Xander were holding him, he added a few adjectives.

All in all, the Summers/Rosenberg/McClay/Harris/er…Spike house was well and happy. Then at dusk of the second day, a knock sounded at the door.

Angel leaped to his feet, cutting Dawn off as she went for the door. All eyes were on him when he stopped at the door and whirled around. "Okay," He held his hands up. "Now I don't want anyone to freak. I asked her here to help Spike. That's all she's going to do. You have my word on it." Skeptical look from Xander notwithstanding, the gang nodded and Angel opened the door. "Come in, Dru."

The figure from Spike's partial recall on the night of the claiming spun into the room. She pushed a packaged object into Angel's hands and then gracefully moved across the living room floor to stop in front of Xander and Spike. Smiling, she bent over and tapped Spike on the nose.

"There you are, my Spike." Drusilla cooed. "I couldn't find you. All lost in light and mist." She stood up. "Daddy called for me to help my boy." Spike squeaked and burrowed into Xander's arms.

"Please, Sire." He whispered. "Don't send me away." Xander's gaze swung from Spike to Drusilla, confusion in his eyes. Angel took pity on the boy.

"Xander, he knows Dru is his Sire." The older vampire stated quietly. "He thinks you called her to take him off of your hands." Xander squeezed Spike tighter and glared at Dru.

"Hell no, you psycho fruitcake!" He snapped. "I'm not letting you get your nasty claws into him again. He's mine now. You left him. So just back the hell off!" Dru smiled happily and whirled around the room, circling Angel.

"Oh, Daddy…look at our boy." She sing-songed. "He's found his little dark kitten. All will be well now." Angel gave up trying to follow Dru's passage and reached out to grasp her arm.

"Not exactly, Dru." He said firmly. "Spike is hurt. Too badly hurt for just blood to heal. I called for you because I have an idea to help him." At this point, Buffy stood angrily.

"Fine then, Angel. What is this plan? And it better be a damn good one to make up for inviting the loony bin escapee into my home!" Angel sighed and gestured back to Buffy's chair.

"Sit down and I'll explain." He answered. "Dru, you sit down too. You're making me dizzy." Dru giggled and plunked herself at Xander's feet. She began to draw little patterns on Xander's leg with her dagger-like fingernails. "Alright. I'm sure you all remember when Spike tried the ritual to heal Dru?"

Nods.

"Well, I think that's our best bet." Willow raised her hand cautiously. Buffy rolled her eyes.

"For crying out loud, Wills, you don't need to raise your hand." Willow shot an embarrassed smile at the Slayer and cleared her throat.

"Um…didn't that ritual require the life's blood of Drusilla's Sire?"

Angel nodded. "Yes, but I think I've found a way around that." Giles perked up and sat forward.

"Do tell, Angel."

"When Spike healed Dru, she only got a partial amount of my energy. Buffy stopped her before she could drain me. So, I was thinking…Dru is Spike's Sire. I'm Dru's Sire. I believe the connection is close enough that if both Dru and I healed Spike together, he would get the full benefit of the spell and neither one of us would die."

Pandemonium broke out. Willow and Giles began to excitedly debate with Tara offering comments in the empty spaces. Buffy stood and began shouting at Angel about the risks involved and what if he was wrong? Dawn got in on that conversation by yelling at Buffy to leave him alone, he was a 200+ year old vampire who wasn't sleeping with her anymore; she had no right to tell him what he could or couldn't do.

Xander looked down at Drusilla. She laid her head on his knee and smiled fondly at him. "I'll do it." She whispered, the sound carrying to Xander's ear even through the din of noise. "I heard the loveliest song today. Ringing through my head." She gently stroked a finger over Spike's leg.

The blonde vampire shivered, but met her gaze. "I heard the little birds singing about my boy. They told me you care for him, little kitten." Xander swallowed then nodded.

"Yes. I do."

Drusilla wrapped her arms around Xander's leg and closed her eyes. "Then all will be well, little kitten. All will be well."

---

Giles, having dredged up the ritual of Eligor again, gladly retired back to his apartment to wait for the new moon three days hence. He was highly thankful that he was not part of the bizarre household that had formed under duress; one slayer, two witches, three vampires, a living key and a construction worker in a pear tree.

However, just because he wasn't present, didn't mean he was left out. He was on the receiving end of at least a call an hour the first day. By the second, he'd begun letting his answering machine take it. By the third, he'd slunk away to the park to research so that the scoobies wouldn't come over to complain in person when he didn't answer their calls.

Spike was frantic. He didn't understand all of the intricacies. He only knew that the two people he remembered belonging to were now living in the house with him. And though Xander stayed close, never refusing to strengthen his claim when Spike needed it, Spike lived in constant terror of being taken away from his 'Sire.' Taken away and given to these two dark creatures who stirred such strange emotions in him.

Xander reveled in the new closeness he had with Spike. He tried to force his mind away from the ugly scenarios that played out concerning a cognitive Spike and the knowledge that Xander had taken advantage of him. Mostly, he could concentrate on reassuring Spike that no one was going to take him away, but sometimes…when Angel or Dru sniffed the air in the wake of a 're-claiming' session…the panic threatened to overwhelm him.

Dawn stayed near one of the scoobies 24/7. The first time she wandered off alone to make a snack in the kitchen, she wound up playing ring around the table with Drusilla. The dark haired vampire danced gracefully around the table, spinning and laughing and asking for just one little taste of Dawn's lovely blood all lit up with green sparklies. Dawn was just about to yell for help when she tripped over her own coltish legs and raked her arm down the side of the counter.

Never in her whole life had she been so grateful to receive an injury. Dru honed in on the tiny droplet of blood left on the pointy corner, giving Dawn time to run for it. Dru nearly floated out of the kitchen, by which time Dawn had ensconced herself behind her sister. The vampiress gazed knowingly at her and smiled a sweet little smile, licking the digit she'd used to transfer the blood from the counter to her lips.

Dru never again tried to corner her, but when she wasn't lurking near her 'boy' and his 'dark kitten', she was nearby, smiling strangely and humming some old lullaby.

Buffy's vampire senses were tingling off of the map. She felt like she had hundreds of ants crawling over her skin; the wrongness of Spike, the memories of Angel's body, the utter wigginess that was Dru. She began carrying a stake with her everywhere. The circles under her eyes grew and she began to look over her shoulder in paranoia at every new noise.

Willow and Tara spent most of their time researching. After the first time Tara tried to pleasantly coax Dru into a conversation and wound up peeling the older woman's hands from her neck, she wisely chose not to approach her again. Apparently, Dru sensed that Tara had a sympathetic power. She felt that Tara was trying to come between Dru and Miss Edith because Miss Edith wanted to sit with the pretty witch at dinner. Willow had never liked the creepy brunette and so was very happy to spend time with Tara…away from the nutball vampire.

The group rarely saw Angel. He cloistered himself in the basement, purportedly to work on the ritual and research more on the Du Lac cross, contained in the package Dru had arrived with the first day. He spent sometime in meditation preparing for the ritual and every now and then ventured up to haul Dru downstairs with him when she pushed too far. Mostly, though, he spent his time remembering the blue-eyed, honey-blonde-haired young man that superimposed himself over the leather clad punk badass that his Childe had become.

---

When the night of the new moon arrived, nearly everyone was in a panic. Giles and Willow were sure they were going to forget something necessary to the ritual and spent the 6 hours before sunset racing madly from the Magic Box library to Giles' private library and back to the Summers' house. Buffy had gone ahead to scout out their chosen church and make sure there were no pesky monsters about to interrupt the ritual.

As such, poor Tara was left to try to calm Giles and Willow down while playing keep-Dawn-away from Dru. She briefly considered asking Angel to help corral Dru, but the storm clouds brewing on his face changed her mind. Xander had taken Spike up to their room when the vampire had begun to whimper at the chaos whirling around the living room and kitchen.

She peeked in on them every couple of hours to see if they needed anything. Each time, she found them curled up under the covers, Spike's face buried in Xander's neck and Xander's arms wrapped around Spike's waist. She was sure they were going to be as stiff as boards by morning, but they looked so contented just holding each other that she crept away each time with a smile on her face.

As soon as the sun set, the group began slipping away in ones and twos to the church. Giles and Willow, of course, were the first to leave. Tara and Dawn followed soon after, Drusilla only minutes behind them. Angel waited a little longer, but eventually took to the streets of Sunnydale once again.

Nearly an hour later, Xander roused Spike with a kiss. "Hey, gorgeous." He whispered. Spike smiled dozily up at him, making Xander smile in return. "Time to get up, lazybones. Time to make you better." Spike crawled into Xander's lap, straddling his legs. He looked seriously into Xander's face, his eyes tracing every line. Xander's smile grew wider. "What are you looking at, you silly vamp?"

Spike reached up, gently stroking Xander's cheek. "Don't leave me, Sire." He whispered, a pleading note in his voice. Xander frowned, and turned his lips into his vampire's palm.

"I won't leave you, baby." He promised. "Never. Even when you're all better and back to being the Big Bad, I'll still be here for you." He smiled sadly. "I'll still love you." Spike's eyes widened a bit and a tiny smile crept onto his face. Xander chuckled. "Yeah, I have shitty timing. I know." He kissed Spike's hand and looked up again. "Waiting til now to tell you that I love you. But I do, you know." He captured the vampire's hands in his own.

"I want you to know that." He said fiercely. "I want you to go into this fucking ritual that may take you from me forever knowing how much I love you. I want it to be the last thing my William remembers before Spike comes back." He blinked back the tears stinging his eyes. "I want…" He choked on his words and just pulled Spike into a tight embrace, letting the cool flesh absorb his hot tears.

Spike soothingly ran his fingers through his Sire's hair. "Love you, Sire." He said softly, worried when his words caused a pained whimper from the human. Xander gave himself a few more minutes to hold the blonde that had become his very world before resigning himself to get a move on.

---

Xander had to stop in the doorway of the old church. ~This is it. This is where I lose him.~ He took inventory of the room, committing the contents of what was soon to be the most reviled room on Earth to memory. Spike looked at him in confusion when they paused. Xander forced a smile and took the vampire's hand in his own before moving forward.

Buffy nearly had to pry their hands apart when she and Giles stepped forward to strap the three vamps into position. She shot him a look of sorrow, but firmly dislodged his grasp. Xander stepped back, the loss of Spike's hand a tangible pain. He felt a warm arm on either side of his waist and looked down into Tara and Dawn's understanding faces.

Spike was placed in-between Angel and Dru's bodies. Leather straps were wrapped around the three to ensure they remained together for the duration of the ritual. Buffy coaxed Spike's arm up above his head and he splayed his fingers obediently. Dru raised her own arm in a mirror of his and waited for Angel to do the same. She laced her fingers with her Sire's, Spike's fingers trapped between them.

When Giles strapped the leather around their wrists and cinched it down, Spike moaned and looked wild-eyed and ready to bolt. Xander stumbled across the broken floor to his side. He ignored the sated smile Dru wore, the brooding, pained look on Angel's face. He had eyes only for Spike.

"Shhh," He whispered. "It's okay, baby. We're gonna make you better." Spike calmed a bit and nuzzled the hand Xander placed on his face. Xander smiled through the hazy sheen in his eyes and leaned forward to kiss the blonde one last time. "I love you." Spike nodded, sadness on his face.

"Love you, Sire. Always." Came the whispered reply. Tara gently pulled him back away from the trio bound to each other on the alter. Tara, Dawn and Xander formed a tight embrace as they scooted against the wall to get out of the way of Willow and Giles' pacing and chanting.

Giles swung a brazier, filling the room with incense while Willow held a sheaf of papers and read out loud. As they began, Buffy pulled out the Du Lac cross and unsheathed the blade within the base. She waited, eyes carefully watching Giles and Willow.

Willow's voice rang out, steady and clear, through the rafters of the old church. "Eligor, I name thee. Bringer of war, poisoners, pariahs, grand obscenity! Eligor, wretched master of decay, bring your black medicine. Come restore your most impious, murderous child. From the blood of the sire he is risen! From the blood of the Sire shall he rise again."

Willow nodded briefly in Buffy's direction. In one swift movement, the Slayer impaled the hands of the vampires, cutting through bone and tissue; imbedding the blade into the wood behind Angel's hand. Xander flinched, but didn't take his eyes off of Spike as each of the vampire's howled at the force of the blow.

Blood spilled down their arms, marring pale flesh. Energy crackled around their hands, causing those watching to squint against the light. Buffy stepped back and flung open the cooler behind her, exposing nearly two dozen blood bags filled with human blood for the end of the ritual. She waited, prepared to wrench out the knife and separate the three should her Watcher or Willow indicate a problem.

Dru cackled madly, she leaned her head back and pressed her hips into her Childe's, erotically grinding into Spike who, in turn, was forced into Angel. Angel averted his head from the group but made no move to stop his wayward Childe's actions. Spike slumped almost immediately, a low whine emerging from his throat.

Soon, even Dru was unable to move and they hung there like meat on a hook, waiting for the witches to end the pain. After an eternity, Willow nodded at Buffy again and the Slayer yanked the knife from its fleshy resting place. She used it to cut the bonds holding the vampires together. Giles stepped up to grasp Drusilla as she canted sideways. Buffy actually lifted Spike from in-between his Sire and Grandsire and carried him to blankets arranged by the blood cooler.

Giles made as if to assist Angel as well, but the older vamp waved him off, opting to slide down the pole to the floor. He gestured to Giles to hand him Dru, and the Watcher gratefully placed the dark haired vampiress into Angel's arms. Xander, Tara and Dawn broke their own embrace and rushed to help Buffy distribute blood.

Tara and Dawn fed Angel and Dru while Xander took Spike into his arms, cradling the blonde head in his lap. He gently fed Spike as he had so many times in the past few weeks. He smiled when he saw the vamp begin to swallow purposefully and continued to feed him until Buffy tapped him on the shoulder.

"We're out of blood." She said softly. "Angel and Drusilla are okay to walk. Do you need some help with Spike?"

Xander thought how uncomfortable Spike would be slung over his shoulder all the way back to Revello Drive and smiled gratefully. "Yes, please."

Buffy grinned and helped the men to their feet, throwing one of Spike's arms over her shoulder. Silently, they made their way back to the house.

---

Buffy and Xander placed Spike back into bed, and then Buffy disappeared downstairs. Drusilla and Angel came in as Xander was washing the dried blood from Spike's arm and chest. He managed a smile and a polite nod and then went back to his task. When he looked up again, they had retrieved chairs from somewhere and were sitting at the bedside, nearly touching him.

He started, and then blushed as Dru giggled. "Silly kitten," she placed the end of her finger between her teeth. "We won't hurt you. We just want to be close to our William." Xander hesitated briefly, then decided 'what the hell?' He leaned forward and kissed the insane woman softly on the cheek. He then turned to Angel and extended his hand. Dru tittered appreciatively and held her hand to her face while Angel looked calmly from Xander's outstretched hand to his determined brown eyes.

Nodding once, he grasped the human's hand. Neither man shook; they just clasped hands for a long moment. Xander turned back to Spike and climbed onto the bed beside his lover. He gathered the blonde into his arms and kissed his forehead. With a final smile to Dru and Angel, he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep, wrapped around his vampire for the last time.

---

Spike slowly became aware of his body. He was slightly sore and for some reason, his hand hurt like a bloody demon. He opened his eyes and took stock of the two figures in front of him. "What the bloody hell are you two doing here?" He growled, his voice cracking. He cleared his throat, wondering for a moment why he felt like he hadn't spoken in a month of Sundays.

"You'd better get out of here." He continued, warily watching his Dark Princess and his blasted Grandsire grin at him. "I mean it. Princess, the Slayer will stake you in a heartbeat. And I have no idea why you're here, Peaches, but I know if you don't get out of here, I'm gonna get blamed for it." He frowned in confusion as the other two vampires began to laugh. "What the bloody hell are you about?' He growled.

Angel leaned forward. "How are you feeling, Spike?" Spike shrugged cautiously.

"Fine. Am I supposed to be feeling poorly?"

Dru giggled. "My lovely boy is all better, Daddy." Angel nodded in agreement.

"He does seem to be, Dru."

Spike glared. Angel took pity on him.

"Do you remember the last few weeks, Spike?" Spike frowned, opening his mouth to berate the older vampire that he was chipped, not dipped. He then realized that he was actually having some trouble with the remembering. He concentrated ferociously, gritting his teeth, feeling the answers just on the edge of his comprehension.

"I remember…fighting? And burning?" He ventured hesitantly, looking up for concurrence. Angel nodded again. "I remember…pain and…" He tilted his head in confusion. "And X-Xander? Taking care of me?" Angel nodded more vigorously. Spike closed his eyes and raked his hands through his hair. "Why would Xander take care of me, Angel?" He sighed. "Boy hates me."

Dru poked him with a sharp fingernail. His eyes shot open and he glared at her. She just smiled secretively and pointed behind him. He turned his head and nearly fell off of the bed. Xander Harris. In bed. With him. Sleeping peacefully. With an arm slung over his waist? His gaze shot back to the other vampires and he snapped his mouth closed.

Angel shrugged. "The boy took care of you every second of the day for the last few weeks. He healed your wounds and brought you back to sanity. Giles called me to ask if I could help restore you to full health and so I came." He grinned wryly at the brunette on the bed with Spike. "You have yourself one hell of a protector, there, Childe. He guards you very possessively."

Spike looked back at the sleeping human. "I…I remember…claiming?" He whispered.

"Yes." Angel answered. "You were so lost, Spike. You needed to be grounded. Claiming was the only way."

Spike gave a narrowed glare to the older vampire. "You?"

Angel laughed. "Unfortunately, no. The boy wouldn't let me. Wouldn't let me near you. He claimed you, Spike. By sex and blood." He finished quietly. "By love." Spike's head shot back up to meet his Grandsire's gaze. He read the truth in those sorrowful brown eyes and then looked back down at Xander.

"Did…did I…reciprocate?" He whispered.

"Yes."

Spike leaned over and began searching the long column of Xander's neck for his mark. As he searched, Xander's eyes fluttered open and stared up into his lover's blue gaze. With a sleepy smile, he reached for the blonde vampire. "Hey, baby. Looking for some reassurance?" He languidly tilted his head and wrapped his arms around Spike's waist.

Spike didn't move. He just stared in openmouthed shock. Xander glanced up when he didn't feel the vampire's teeth on his neck and saw Spike gaping at him. Xander opened his eyes fully and caught sight of Dru and Angel by the side of the bed. "Oh, shit." He murmured, coming totally awake. "I take it that it worked?" He grinned weakly at Spike. Then began to babble.

"Well, I'm sure you probably have a lot to catch up on with Angel and Dru. And I bet you'll want to take a shower. And get into some clean clothes. Hey! I bet you're hungry too, huh? How bout I go on downstairs and get you a mug of blood? Or-or I could make you some eggs or something? Maybe pancakes? I could make the happy faces. Oh, wait, evil again. You probably wouldn't want the happy faces. Well, I can make angry faces…I think. Why don't I just get up and go see if I can? Okay? Great! Well, ummm….gotta go! Ummm, bye?"

Xander leaped from the bed while Spike was still processing the Xander babble. The brunette bolted from the room and took the stairs two at a time, not stopping until he had made it to the kitchen. He skidded to a halt and gasped for breath, waving off the worried looks from the ladies of the house and Giles.

Spike looked from the empty doorway to the other two occupants of the room. "What the hell was that?" He asked calmly. Dru stood and leaned over the bed. She caught his lower lip between her fangs and nipped him. As he started, she pulled back, licking the blood from her lips.

"My time here is over, Spike m'love." She purred, swishing the long sleeves of her dress. "You are better now and Daddy and I must leave. Your dark kitten fears our presence. Too many mummies, there are." Spike blinked.

"Mummies? Kittens? What are you nattering on about now, Princess?" He sighed.

Dru just smiled sweetly. "We will see each other again, my Spike." She turned to walk out of the room. "Hmmm, I wonder if I could have another taste of the sparkly green bit before I go?" She murmured. Spike sat upright, a worried look on his face. Angel laid an easing hand on the blonde's arm and shook his head.

"She won't. Buffy won't let her." When Spike lay back against the pillows, Angel chose not to remove his hand, allowing himself the pleasure of touching his boy before being forced to return to the subject of Xander.

"What did she mean about too many mummies?" Spike demanded. Angel inwardly sighed. ~So much for that thought.~

"He thinks you allowed him to claim you only because there was no other choice and that he somehow manipulated you into loving him." Spike blinked rapidly.

"Loving him?" He repeated.

Angel nearly smirked. "Yes. He thinks that you felt you owed him the claim for taking care of you. Or at least that's how I interpreted it. He was very worried that you would hold it against him when you returned to normal. Are you planning to?" He asked casually, watching the heat flare in Spike's eyes. He sighed again. Yes, he'd truly lost his boy. And to a human. Not just a human…but Xander Harris.

"I have to follow the claim, Angel." Spike muttered. "I can't not follow it." Angel looked at him with a raised eyebrow. First, the blonde looked away. Then he began fidgeting. Then he growled. "Fine, bugger it all. I don't really mind the claim."

Angel nodded and finally removed his hand. "So you love him." He stated.

Spike hunched under the covers with a glare. "Yeah, so what?"

"When?"

"When, what, Peaches?" Spike snapped.

"When did you fall for him? When you woke up and began treating him like a surrogate Sire? When he Claimed you? When?" Angel could hear his voice getting more demanding and he tried to tone it down. The last thing he needed on top of the humiliation of losing Spike to Xander Harris was Spike knowing how much it bothered him.

He needn't have worried. Spike had a dreamy smile on his lips and was staring at the empty doorframe. "When he tied me to that bloody chair and tried to force me to admit I wanted to bite him." He answered quietly. Angel frowned.

"You were in love with him before you were hurt?" He asked incredulously. Spike focused on him again and snorted.

"Oh, hell no! I usually grab live power wires while standing in a fucking puddle with a demon gnawing on my ankles for some bloody twit I don't even like!" He rolled his eyes and threw back his covers. "I'm getting dressed, Peaches. Stay or leave. 'Sup to you." He went to push past the older vampire but was stopped by a gentle hand on his wrist.

"Spike…William." Angel breathed, gazing up at his boy. "I just wanted…I wanted to tell you that I'm glad you're all right. I'm thankful the ritual worked. And I'd do it again in an instant." He stood, pressed against the shorter vampire. "I just wanted to let you know that, if you ever need me…for anything…I'll be here." Spike's eyes met Angel's and Spike could see the underlying emotion.

"Angel." He returned, resting his hands on the bigger man's hips. "Thank you for helping me. For convincing Dru to help. For letting Xander Claim me. I know how hard it must have been to see your Childe in need and not be able to comfort him." A tiny smile appeared on his lips. "I do love you, Angel. I always will." He whispered. "You were my absolute everything…once upon a time."

Angel closed his eyes briefly, letting his head fall forward to rest against Spike's. "But not this time." Angel said wryly, trying to cover the ache in his voice.

Spike rubbed his forehead on his Grandsire's. "No, Sire. Not this time." Angel dropped his head a bit and captured Spike's lips. For long moments, he imprinted the feeling of his boy's mouth to his mind; committed the boy's taste to memory. Then he let go. Without a backwards look, he left the room. Spike stood in place, his eyes still closed, listening to the front door close, a car start and his Sire drive out of his life again.

Then, he gathered up some clothes and headed for the bathroom.

---

Downstairs, Xander managed to impart the story of Spike's return without crying. The Scoobies were ecstatic. Xander was glad someone was. The girls began bustling around the kitchen making Spike's happy face pancakes while Xander moved out to sit on the couch in the living room.

He watched Dru float down the stairs like a shadowy vision and he smiled. "Leaving now, are you?" He asked. Dru nodded and came to perch on the arm of the couch.

"Kitten, you must promise me to take very good care of my boy." She warned, a long lacquered finger pointing at his chest. Xander laughed humorlessly.

"Yes, ma'am." He whispered.

Dru smiled and kissed him on the cheek. "Goodbye, my dark kitten." And she was gone in a whirl of black silk and lace. Xander leaned back against the couch and pondered the bizarreness of his world that insane Drusilla would kiss him goodbye more tenderly than any of his own family ever had.

Not too long after, Angel swept down the stairs as well. Unlike Dru, he only spared a look for the man on the couch. And it wasn't a very pleased look. He nodded once and then shut the door behind him. Xander grinned. "Now that's the goodbye I was expecting."

---

Xander had almost convinced himself to just run out of the house like a terrified little girl when he saw Spike making his way down the stairs. The blonde stopped when he noticed Xander watching him. He smiled. Xander sat up a bit straighter and tried to smile back.

"So, feeling better after a shower?" Xander asked. ~Could you ask any lamer of a question, dumbass?~

Spike nodded. "Yeah. Ready for some of those happy faced pancakes, I am." ~Could you come up with any stupider reply, wanker?~

"The girls will be happy to hear that! They've been getting ready to hug the stuffing out of you since I told them you were awake." ~Sure, make with the nicey nice talk. Direct his attention to the girls and not to the fact that he woke up next to you. And let's make sure he doesn't have to talk about how you practically begged him to bite you.~

Spike looked at him seriously and continued his way down the stairs, coming to a stop in front of the human. "And what about you, Xander?" He asked softly. "Have you been waiting to hug the stuffing out of me, too?"

Xander swallowed. Then swallowed again. ~What the hell is in my throat, exactly?~ "I…er-"

Spike reached up and cupped his cheek. "Or do you regret all the effort you put into me and look forward to getting rid of me?" The spark that flared in those brown eyes caused the pain in his chest to ease a bit.

"Of course I don't regret it!" Xander snapped. "And I'm not particularly looking forward to getting rid of you. You kind of grew on me. On all of us, actually."

Spike smiled softly. "So, you're not kicking me to the curb, then. That's nice to know. Are you planning to leave yourself? Find a new place to live? Refuse to invite me in?" Xander just stared, transfixed by the vampire's husky voice. "Are you planning on leaving me?"

Xander shook his head slowly, a look of wonder crossing over his face. Spike snuck his arms around Xander's waist and leaned forward to rub his cheek on the human's more abrasive one. "Don't leave me, Sire." He whispered. Spike could feel Xander's body jerk in his arms, and he gently licked the curve of the brunette's ear. "Don't leave me now that I'm all better and I'm back to being the Big Bad." He nuzzled the curve of Xander's neck. "Because I'm not, really. I'll never be all better if you leave. And being the Big Bad just doesn't compare to being the Claimed of Xander Harris."

Xander pushed away to stare into Spike's eyes. He could see the truth shining there. And he felt the dam of emotion break within him. Tears threatened to spill from his eyes; uncontrollable laughter from his throat. "I love you, Spike." He choked out.

Spike kissed a tear away and smiled back at his lover. "I love you, too, Sire."

~Fin~