Strip Tease

By Velvet Crypt

Chapter One

Spike picked up a leather harness and smiled in fond remembrance. He brought the contraption to his nose and inhaled the scent of new, unused leather and his mind supplied the scent of sex and blood. After a moment, he put the harness down, guiltily looking about the store, wondering if anyone noticed the hard-on he suddenly sported.

With a snort he shrugged. Bloody hell, nancy boy, you're in a sex shop. Three quarters of the clientele have hard-ons. He reluctantly moved away from the bondage toys and browsed towards the back of the shop where he saw clothing. As he stepped through the throng of giggling tourists piled up around the titty-tassels, his breath caught.

A familiar shaped head graced the shoulders of a familiar shaped body. The clothes certainly looked nothing like those he'd seen the whelp in last, but he knew beyond a doubt that it was Xander Harris. The boy was prowling through g-strings, every now and then setting one aside.

Spike watched him for long moments, memories flooding his brain, bringing back old pain. After nearly raping Buffy, he'd run away, determined to get his chip out to show her what it meant to fuck with a vampire's emotions. But what he got was his soul. How much more pathetic could one undead being get? A chip and a soul. It was a fucking nightmare.

He knew there was no way he could ever go back to Sunnydale. He refused to run sniveling to his sire. So, he just kept moving, not unlike what he and Dru had done for half a century. Only this time, he did it alone. And he hated it. He hated being alone. He kept in touch regularly with Clem, having left his crypt in the floppy eared demon's care.

Clem informed him that the Bit and the Slayer were teaming up now. Dawn showed promise in taking on her share of slaying duties. It seemed that those monks might have put a bit much of the Slayer into the Slayer's sister. With the right training, there might be another line for the Watcher's to panic over.

Willow had gone to England with Giles after Tara's death. Spike had been truly saddened by the loss of Tara. He'd genuinely liked the little blonde witch. She was a good influence on the otherwise hot headed scoobies. She had a good heart. She would be missed.

Xander had left for parts unknown. It seemed he finally realized that Anya was never going to give up vengeance again, even if he somehow convinced her to get back together with him. He felt badly for the human. He'd had his world rocked, his entire future had been jerked out from under his feet and he was left confused and lonely.

Every one of the other scoobies had someone to fall back on, or something to go back to. Xander had nothing. His girlfriend toddled on back to her boss. His best friend ran away to England with his father figure. His surrogate sisters were bonding too tightly to each other to let him in. No, doughnut boy was well and truly alone.

Spike knew what that felt like. He stepped forward and cleared his throat. Xander glanced at him in irritation, then did a double take and shifted slightly to face the vampire. Spike smiled at the picture the boy presented. He looked good. He'd filled out in ways Spike never would have imagined carpentry could do for you. And he showed it off.

He was dressed in red silk and black leather. Everything clung in the right places. He had also pierced his ears. Tiny silver hoops hung from his lobes. He'd let his hair grow shaggy again, but it was artistically styled to look tousled…just out of bed, Spike thought. It looked damn good on him.

"Hey, Xander." He offered. The boy just stared at him.

"What the hell are you doing here? Did they send you?" Xander asked harshly, then he shook his head, a look of humorless amusement on his face. "Of course not. They don't even know where I am, do they? So, why are you here, Spike?"

Spike nearly dropped his eyes, but lifted his chin instead. "I was making my rounds of the country, thought I'd stop off in New Orleans. It's a great city to get lost in." He said pointedly. >From Xander's tense muscles he could tell he scored a direct hit.

"So, what are you doing here? In this store?" Xander pushed. Spike smiled sadly.

"Reminiscing, mostly." Xander snorted in derision. Spike ignored it. "So, you want to go for a cuppa? Talk about old times?" He continued hopefully, knowing he sounded like a complete ponce and not really caring.

Xander laughed in his face. "You're fucking kidding, right? No way in hell I'm spending any time at all with you, Fangless. I've had enough of you to last a lifetime. You think New Orleans is such a great place to get lost in? Well, good. Then get lost."

He turned back to his shopping and dismissed the blonde vampire. Spike nodded, saddened but not really surprised. He turned away and began squeezing through the crowd of now-muted tourists, pretending they didn't hear what they were so obviously eavesdropping on a moment ago.

"Shouldn't be too hard, pet." He whispered. "Can't get much more lost than I am right now."

---

Xander was surprisingly pleased at how well he controlled his trembling as the older man walked away. What the hell was he expecting, Xander thought. A hug? A 'good to see you old buddy'? Hello? Fucked my girlfriend here! He tried unsuccessfully to grind down that little voice that kept prodding at him: wasn't your girlfriend when he fucked her. You dumped her. Your loss.

Xander sighed. He missed the gang more than he could put into words. In the last year, he'd managed to get thinking-of-them time down to about 5 times a day, but it still twisted every time. He was more irritated that he'd gotten excited at seeing Spike, a link to home, than he was irritated that the vamp had spoken to him.

Then he heard those whispered words, "Can't get much more lost than I am right now," and his heart twisted. Oh, gods how he knew that feeling. With a growl of impatience, he threw the tiny pieces of material down and spun around.

"Godammit, Spike," he called out to the figure nearing the front of the store. "Wait up."

---

"So, then I just started wandering around, avoiding everyone I ever knew." Spike laughed disparagingly.

Xander lifted his coffee cup, and then put it back down again. "Man, you got fucked." He said in amazement. Spike barked out a laugh that had the coffee shop patrons turning their heads with indulgent smiles.

"Well, if that isn't the understatement of the year." He chortled. "How about you?"

Xander shrugged, smiling secretly. "I took every cent I had, bought a bus ticket and just hopped off at the first place that struck my fancy." Spike grinned.

"So what are you doing shopping in a BSDM store?"

"I didn't want to go back into construction." Xander started, looking into curious blue eyes. "So I fell back on one of my former talents. I got a job bartending in this strip club called The Dungeon."

He watched Spike's eyes widen and nearly giggled. "B-but The Dungeon is a gay strip club." The vamp sputtered.

Xan nodded. "I found that out the first night." Spike nearly choked on his coffee.

"I worked as the bartender for nearly 3 months before one of the strippers called in sick. The boss needed a replacement, and after my gig in Oxnard, I figured what the hell. So I got onstage, shook my ass, made more tip money in 5 minutes than I'd made the entire last week bartending. Boss offered me the position. I snapped it up." He sat back with a predatory smirk.

Spike forcibly snapped his jaw shut. "You're a stripper." Nod. "At a gay club." Nod. "And you like it." Nod. "Well, bugger me." Nod. Spike jumped and Xander's rich laughter pealed out across the café, customers looked again, smiling.

"Calm down, Spike. I promise I won't take advantage of you." He drained his cup. "I have to be to work in about 30 minutes. You're welcome to come along. I'll get you in and if you want to wait til the show is over, you can crash at my place tonight."

Spike felt a smile break over his lips. "I'd like that, pet."


Chapter Two

Spike was surprised to see the whelp's dressing room. Other than a huge wardrobe, it was mostly empty. "Where's all the geegaws?" He asked.

Xander shot him an unreadable glance. "Don't keep any. Don't really like reminders." Spike chose not to address the implication that he too was a reminder. He just nodded and continued poking around in the closet.

"Don't have many themed outfits." He pointed out casually. Xander sat at the dressing table and began to fix his hair.

"Don't need them. I have someone from the audience choose what I dance to. So I try to go with outfits that will work with anything that gets played." Spike raised an eyebrow. "It works, really." Xander laughed. "Most of them choose ass shaking music anyway, and it really draws a crowd, thinking that they might be the one who 'owns me' for the night. I usually go have a drink with them later and cover their bar tab."

"Hey, that's damn clever!" Spike chortled.

"Wanna pick my outfit tonight?" Xander asked, a husky note in his voice. Spike drew in an involuntary breath, and then nodded. He tilted his head to get a good look at the boy and turned back to the closet. Fishing around, he pulled out a silver mesh g-string and a pair of black leather velcro pants. He completed the ensemble with a silver snapped black leather vest.

He held them up for approval and Xander grinned. "That's scary. You just picked my favorite outfit." He dug in a drawer beside him and pulled out a spiked collar and wrist cuffs. He tossed them on top of the clothes Spike laid on a chair and began scrounging in a jewelry case. He drew out a set of silver nipple rings and a delicate silver chain.

Spike took a seat against the wall and watched as Xander transformed himself from the Xander he knew into walking sex on legs. The boy finished his hair and stripped completely. Spike was a little surprised at his total lack of modesty, but shrugged it off. After all, the boy regularly dropped trou for a living, what was getting naked in front of one person?

The blonde stared hungrily at the muscled form, skin sleek and looking soft to the touch. He imagined peeling the leather from it, tasting every exposed inch as he went. He could nearly feel the tickling of the tiny leg hairs against his tongue, taste the salty sweat as it rose in a glossy sheen on the boy's-

Okay. Calming down now. Spike took a deep breath and looked away. When he trusted himself not to jump the boy, he turned back. Xander had put on the pants and was working on inserting the matched set of nipple rings. Spike made it through that and the fastening of the silver chain in-between them. Then Xander gave the chain a slight tug, wrenching against his nipples.

Spike let out a small moan. He frantically cleared his throat and began fiddling with his lighter. Xander looked over at the bowed blonde head and a sly smile of satisfaction appeared. The next time Spike dared to look up, Xander was totally dressed and standing in front of him. The vamp noticed that the boy hadn't donned any shoes.

He looked inquiringly between the bare feet and Xander's amused eyes. "I think the stupidest thing in the world is to have a man shaking his dick in your face while wearing combat boots." He explained and held out a hand to help Spike to his feet. Xander pointed out the door to the club and headed back to the staging area for the strippers.

Spike slipped through and was immediately overwhelmed by the bass thrumming through him and the smell of arousal that blanketed the room. He grinned predatorily and made his way to the stage. He loomed behind a huge man in a muscle tee who was sitting on the bar stool with the best view of where his Xan-pet would be dancing.

His Xan-pet. Did that actually just form in my head? What the fuck? He shook his head to rid the vision of a silver mesh g-string against sable dark hair. The interloper turned with a sneer. He stood to his full height and slammed his drink on the bar. "Can I help you find somewhere else to stand?" He growled. Leaning down into Spike's face.

Spike let a slow smile creep across his face. He allowed his eyes to melt into gold. He watched. The larger man's bravado evaporated one muscle at a time. By the time he had decided to vacate the bar stool, he was hunched and he stared at his feet. He even forgot his drink.

Spike took the seat over. He settled in, downing the man's scotch in one gulp. A sideways glance cleared out the stools on either side of him and he sat down to wait for the show.

---

Spike had just ordered a new drink when a shirtless male waiter in leather and a bow tie slid into the seat beside him. The man shoved a book in front of Spike's face and nodded. "Hey. Xander tells me you're Spike. I'm Matt." He held out a hand. Spike looked at it for a long moment and then followed the arm up to Matt's face.

The return look said 'I know what you're doing. Give me your hand anyway.' On a whim, Spike clasped the human's hand. Matt firmly shook it and opened the book. "Xan wants you to pick his song tonight. He said he'd do anything in the book that you wanted." Matt wiggled his eyebrows.

"You must really be something, man. He lets you choose his outfit and gives you free rein on the bump and grind? Wow." Spike pulled the book over to him. "Not really. I'm figuring it for a peace offering, actually."

"Why? What'd he do?"

Spike paused in flipping through pages and looked at the human. "Now that's for Xander to tell you, I think."

Matt shrugged, acquiescing, and waited for Spike to choose a song. Eventually, Spike put his finger under a title and Matt leaned over to look. A grin split his face. "Well, lookee there." He shut the book and stood. Spike grabbed his arm before he could go.

"What did you mean by that?"

"Just that you're in for a real show. That's Xan's favorite practice song." Matt disappeared into the crowd.

A huge man stepped out onstage ducking the backstage door. It had a clearance of 8 feet. Spike wondered how anyone believed he was human. Didn't they realize humans don't come in sizes that large? "Welcome to The Dungeon gentlemen." He boomed without the use of a mike.

The room quieted. "We are proud to introduce…Xander." For such a brief intro, the crowd went wild. Spike chuckled at how much the grown men sounded like little girls at a Britney Spears concert. Not that he knew what anyone at Britney's concerts would sound like. Of course not. He just had heard it on MTV. While he was channel chasing. Cause he wouldn't watch a Britney video all the way through.

Shut up, ponce. He finally snapped at his inner voice. The lights dimmed and a spotlight opened up on a motionless body on stage. Bloody hell, Spike berated himself. Whelp walked out here and I didn't even notice. The beat of the music started and Spike lost himself in the show.

Xander didn't dance to the music. The music followed his motions. Every thrust of his hips was echoed by a drumbeat, every gesture of his arms was imitated by the crooning voice in the background. When he tugged the snaps on his vest apart, the bass thrummed out a counter beat. As the music edged toward the chorus, Xander's eyes met Spike's and he blew a tiny kiss to the vamp.

I wanna fuck you.

Xander ripped the vest open and threw his head back. Spike got instantly hard.

I wanna taste you.

He let the vest slip from his arms and slid bonelessly to his knees in front of the vampire. Running one lone finger down his chest, damp with sweat, he held it out in supplication.

I wanna feel you.

Spike took the proffered finger into his mouth and shuddered as Xander's taste rolled across his tongue.

I wanna be you.

Xan pulled away gently and rose back to his feet effortlessly. He closed his eyes and moved to the music in wanton abandon. He looked nothing like a stripper gyrating to a 'fuck-me' song. He was the song.

Spike was taken back to a time when he first saw the boy, dancing in the Bronze with the Slayer and the Witch. He'd danced like no one was watching him. He didn't care that sometimes he flailed, or sometimes he missed a beat. He danced because he felt it. Because he couldn't not dance.

This time around, his moves were designed to create arousal. His outfit was meant to tease. And his timing was impeccable. His dancing, though? That was still meant for him. He shared it with the audience, but he still danced because he couldn't not dance. Spike knew that was why he was the most sought after stripper in the club. Spike also knew that he was going to spend the rest of the night with a raging hard-on.

Xander jerked the leather pants from his hips with one practiced move. His hands hovered over his own chest, his sides, his ass…never quite touching any of them. Spike could appreciate the boy's choice not to wear shoes. Fuck, even the whelp's feet were turning him on.

As the song ground to a close, Xander once again hooked a finger in the chain that bound his nipples together. He looked straight into Spike's eyes and melted into the floor again. As the final beats played out, he lay back and arched his spine, showing his profile in stark relief. The last thing the audience saw before the lights went off again was Xander pulling up roughly on the chain.

When the lights came back on, the stage was empty.


Chapter Three

Spike stared at the empty stage, thinking his brain was misfiring. Was that Xander? Xander Harris? The Zeppo? Was it possible for that vision of sex on legs to be the same boy who wore big, fat, pink flowers on his shirts and shoved jelly doughnuts in his mouth? Was it really possible that he, Spike, had the most painful hard on he'd ever experienced just from watching Xander Harris dance?

A touch on his shoulder brought him out of his reverie. He tilted his head sideways and the object of his thoughts-and the bulge in his pants-stood grinning at him. "So, whadya think?" He pulled up a barstool and nodded at the bartender. The apron clad man set a glass of amber liquid on the rocks in front of the dancer and winked.

"Nice set, Xander. You notice how everyone gets real thirsty after your show." Xander blew a kiss at the larger man and turned, laughing, back to Spike.

"So, Spike, thoughts? Comments? Complaints?" He sipped at his whiskey.

Spike quirked an eyebrow. "Well, I could say you bloody stunk, cause I'm going to hell anyway…what's one more lie?"

Xander chuckled and hopped off of the stool. He grabbed Spike's hand and tugged him through the crowd. He made his way to the very back of the club and to a secluded booth. Two men were there before them, kissing passionately. Xander cleared his throat and waited patiently.

A set of glazed green eyes peered up at him and blinked. "Xander?"

"Yup. It's me. Xander. Xander who's done with his set. And it's you! Adrian. Who goes on after me. Who needs to get changed. Who needs to move so I can have the booth." During Xander's commentary, Adrian yelped and scrambled out of the booth muttering 'shitshitshit.' He bolted past Xander with a smile of thanks and disappeared into the crowd.

His partner slid out of the booth and nodded at Xander. "Better get my seat up front if I don't want anyone groping my guy." Xander smiled and let him by. Then he pulled Spike into the booth.

"So, tell me."

"Tell you what, pet?"

"Whatever you want."

Spike sighed and lit a cigarette. "I can't."

"Can't or won't?"

"Does it matter?"

Xander stared at him, quiet for a moment, as the music thrummed through the room. "Yeah, I think it does."

Spike quirked his lips wryly. "So, where'd you learn to dance like that?"

Xander acknowledged the abrupt change in topic with a sigh of his own. "I had a brief stint after high school. Freaked me out, but I guess I was pretty good at it. I never planned on doing it again, but when I got here…I dunno. I guess it just seemed like the thing to do."

Spike nodded. "I know how that goes."

Xander raised an eyebrow. "How what goes? Things happening spontaneously? Or deciding to strip for a living?"

If he weren't sure vampires couldn't blush, he would have swore that was a rosy hue to Spike's skin.

"Both."

"You? You were a stripper?" Xander's mouth hung open. Spike swirled his drink around in his glass and nodded again.

"When? Where? How? Why?"

"If you ever give up your night job, you'd make a good reporter, luv," Spike joked. "About 1980 or so. In New York. By applying to the owner of the club. And cause I was bored. Dru drug me into some club or another and cooed the rest of the night how the strippers 'sang' to her with their bodies." He rolled his eyes. "Bloody well wanted to strangle her after the first 3 hours. Figured if I learned how, she'd stop dragging me about and I wouldn't have to listen to it anymore."

"Whoa." Xander sat back, dumbfounded. "Would you do it again?"

"Dunno. Didn't mind it. Got do three of my favorite things, didn't I?" He took a deep drag from his cigarette.

"And those are?" Xander asked into the silence.

"Got to listen to my favorite tunes. Got to cater to my narcissistic side and show off. And after the show, I had blokes and chits begging for sex. Pretty easy to sneak a bite in here or there while you're shagging."

Xander chortled and finished off his glass. " Ya wanna head back to my place?"

After a long look Xander tried to read but couldn't, Spike nodded. "Sure."

---

Xander lived in a posh two-story house in the Garden District. Spike was pretty sure that, with all the foliage surrounding the house, he could stand outside at noon on a summer day and not burn. Xander pulled the car, a sleek little silver Miata convertible, into the garage and led the way to the front door.

He stepped in and turned. "This is my home, Spike. You are welcome in it." He pronounced formally. Spike entered. Looking around, he was amazed.

"I don't know how to tell you this, pet, but I may have rubbed off on you."

Xander took a step and closed the distance between Spike and him. He molded his front to Spike's back and leaned over his shoulder. Spike shuddered at the warm breath puffing across his neck. "I don't know, Spike. I don't remember any rubbing. Was I asleep at the time?" He purred.

Spike sucked in an unneeded breath. "Err…I meant my taste…in furniture and decorations!" He finished, tripping over his own tongue as Xander's tongue seared the flesh in the crook of his neck.

"Ah…furniture. Well," He continued to ghost his lips just above Spike's skin. "I guess in my line of work, leather grows on you. I like to feel sensual. At work, at home. I wanted an environment where I could feel sexy no matter what I was doing." He trailed his mouth up to Spike's ear, smiling in triumph when the vampire let out a breathy moan.

"W-well, Xan…I don't think you have much to worry about." Spike closed his eyes. "I'm thinking I'd wanna fuck you if you were giving me communion." A low chuckle was his answer and the warmth left his back. He nearly staggered at the loss.

"So, liked the show, did you?" Xander kicked his boots off and headed for the kitchen.

Spike took a moment to pull himself together before following Xander into the other room. "Yeah. Liked it a lot."

Xander stopped and looked him in the eyes. Heavy lidded brown eyes, seething with sexuality met confused blue ones, full of thwarted need. "I liked you watching, Spike, and that's unusual. Mostly, I just get up there and dance for me. Sometimes I do it for the tips. But I've never done it for anyone else before. Tonight, I was dancing for you. I have to admit, that's a real turn on." He stared for a moment more and then moved on to the fridge.

He pulled out two beers and tossed one to Spike, who caught it with trembling hands. Hopping up on the counter, he twisted the cap off and tilted his long neck back to pour the liquid down his throat. Spike swallowed heavily.

"Are you trying to kill me, Xander?' He whispered.

"Why do you ask?"

"What is going on here?" He demanded. "Last I knew, you hated me. Blamed me for…well, for everything that ever went wrong with you and your group. You wanted to stake me. I run into you in a different city and bam! That Xander is gone. In his place is this…very fucking hot exotic dancer who seems to be trying to seduce me. What gives?"

Xander shrugged. "Does it matter?"

"Yeah," Spike threw his words back at him. "I think it does."

Xander chuckled and began idly picking the label off of the bottle. "I dunno, Spike. Looking back at it all, it seems so fucking stupid. I didn't want to get married. The break up was all me. I may as well have sent Anya to you. I was just looking for some reason for it to not be my fault. And Buffy? I don't know what the fuck I was thinking there. Maybe it was cause I thought I was supposed to be pissed. Maybe its cause she was like a sister to me, and you know how brothers are about guys fucking their sisters."

He looked up at the vampire. "I left all that behind me in SunnyHell. I'm the new and improved Xander Harris." He raised his beer in a toast. "All I know is that I don't have the same hang-ups here that I did there. That includes liking you. I always thought you were pretty cool, actually."

He smiled at the vampire's shocked look. "I did. You never took anyone's shit. You have a great sense of humor. You can kick some serious ass. I liked hanging around with you. I wondered what you were like in bed after the Anya thing. I must admit, I think I was a bit jealous. Of both of you."

"So, you're a bit bent, then?" Spike asked carefully.

Xander laughed. "Bent. I like that. Yeah, I guess you could say I'm a bit bent. I find men just as sexy as women. Sometimes more so. Like in your case." He swept his eyes over Spike's body in a way that was becoming quickly addictive. "I find you very sexy, Spike. Always have. I guess I'm just in a place in my life where I'm finally willing to admit that."

"Oh." ~Brilliant, William~ Spike growled at himself. ~Very verbose. Perhaps you should try guttural grunts next time?~

Xander didn't seem to mind though. He hopped down. "Well, I'm tired. I only have one bed, but it's pretty big and really comfortable. I promise I won't try to seduce you anymore tonight." He grinned. "Note the emphasis on the word 'tonight.' But I would like if you would sleep with me. Just sleep."

He looked so earnest that Spike couldn't imagine refusing him. Right. Like that was really going to happen. ~Who the hell do you think you're fooling, ponce?~ "Okay." ~Oh, look! We've graduated to two syllable sounds!~ He took the hand Xander reached out to him and allowed Xander to lead him into the master bedroom.

The boy wasn't lying. The bed was huge. He glanced at Xander and was a bit startled to see him shucking out of his clothes already. Spike stood and stared as Xander got completely naked. ~Oh, dear fucking Lord.~ Spike mentally moaned when Xan's pants cleared his hips. The boy was half hard and very impressive. Spike moved his hands in front of his crotch covering his reaction.

Xander flung the covers back and crawled into bed. Spike stared. "What?" the human asked.

"You…errr…you're n-…you have no…" ~What? Am I bloody 15?~ "You're naked."

Xander looked down at his covered body. "Yeah?" He looked up at Spike with a twinkle in his eye. "That bother you?"

"Err…not exactly bother…but it's very distracting."

"Sorry." He didn't sound sorry. "I think I have some boxers in my top drawer. I usually don't wear underwear. It makes lines."

Spike bit his lip and headed for the drawer. ~Lovely. Just what I needed to dwell on all night. Xander doesn't wear underwear. Like he doesn't wear pajamas. Like he isn't trying to seduce me. Like I don't want him to. Bloody hell, William. Shut. Up.~ He pulled a pair of silk boxers out of the drawer and hurriedly changed clothes, well aware that Xander was following his every move.

He climbed into bed next to Xander and lay flat on his back, covers pulled up to his chest. Xander snickered and turned out the light. "Do you know how goddamn cute you are?" Spike frowned. "No, really. You're adorable. Come here, blondie." He opened his arms. "I promise I won't try anything tonight. You have my word."

Spike reluctantly scooted over and let Xander close warm, strong arms around him. The human sighed happily. "I haven't cuddled with anyone in…well, in a really long time."

Spike laid his head against Xander's hard chest, listening to the rhythmic beat of his heart. His eyes slid shut. Xander's breathing soothed him in a way he hadn't imagined he even needed to be soothed.

" Night, Spike."

"Goodnight, Xander."

Spike found his cheek pressed to the boy's hard chest. Closing his eyes, he let the sound of Xander's heartbeat and easy breathing lull him to sleep.

Chapter Four

Spike woke up in the last place he would have guessed had someone asked yesterday where he would be spending his day; cradled in warm human arms, gentle breath teasing the curls on the top of his head. And yet, it felt good. It felt right. He lay in the light of predawn and pondered the events that brought him to this place and time.

After getting his soul back, and several months of beating himself about the head and shoulders for all the shitty things his demon made him do, he realized something. It wasn't his demon. His demon had freed him from the moral, and mortal, tedium he had as a human. The demon had poked holes in his beliefs, his values. It had shown him how pathetic he was, begging for affection, hoping his destiny would take him by the hand and lead him into the sunlight.

Well, destiny did take his hand. Though she led him into a darkened alley and bit him really hard. He smiled into Xander's chest. Ow, ow! Indeed. What a wanker William was. He was. He was William. The demon couldn't change that. It could open new doors for him, but whether he chose to walk through them or not was still all William. The loss of inhibitions served to push him through slightly more dangerous doors than William might have chosen otherwise, but in the end…it was still his choice.

Anya was his choice. He knew she was hurting. Hell, so was he. He knew it was a bad idea. He just needed something to drive the taste, the smell, the feel of Buffy from his senses. He knew that when Anya closed her eyes, she was seeing dark brown hair, brown eyes, the gentle face of the man next to him. The whole activity was pointless. He still saw Buffy. She still saw Xander. The only thing they managed to do was waste an hour or so and piss off their significant others to the point of no return.

Pushing Buffy to the point of rape was his choice also. He was so desperate to be loved, to have someone…just once…admit to loving him. William needed it. Oh, he could glean love from speech and actions as he had with Angelus and Dru. But no one would say it. No one would look into his eyes, cup his face and tenderly tell him 'I love you, Wil.'

Spike snorted. ~Oh, fer cryin' out loud, you poncey wanker!~ He gently scooted out from under Xander's arm, regretfully leaving the warm cocoon. Moving quietly, he headed for the living room. He absently pulled the heavy draped of a day sleeper over the windows to prevent combustion and lay on the floor in front of the fireplace. He put his arms behind his head and stared at the ceiling.

Xander couldn't pinpoint the moment he knew Spike had left the bed, but he noticed the loss almost immediately. It had been a long, long time since anyone had shared his bed the whole night through. He knew now why he always ushered them out the door soon after the heady rush was gone. After feeling what it was like to fall asleep next to someone again, knowing they'd be there in the morning…the loss was physically painful.

He slid out of bed and pulled his pants on. Padding on bare feet, he made his way out to the living room. Coming down the stairs, he saw Spike lying on the floor. Pausing a moment, he sat down on the step above his feet and watched. Spike looked so very sad. Granted, he also looked totally gorgeous and wholly edible, but mostly sad. Was he upset at Xander making a pass at him? Xander felt a twinge of guilt mixed in with disappointment.

Fuck it, he thought. You never know if you never ask. He stood and made his way to Spike's side. The vampire opened his eyes as Xander sank to the floor in a graceful heap. A tiny smile welcomed Xander, and then Spike closed his eyes again. Xander took in the smile with a spark of hope and scooted around to Spike's head.

There was a moment of awkwardness as Xander lifted the blonde head and placed it in his lap, but when he began kneading his fingers through the platinum locks, Spike settled down and didn't move. "What's wrong, blondie?" Xander asked quietly, enjoying the feel of the silky strands flowing through his fingers.

"Just contemplating what a fucked up mess I've made of my life. Of your life. Of all the lives of everyone I've ever known." The older man smiled wryly.

"How's that?"

Spike snorted. "I shagged your bird. Kinda left a sour taint to the relationship. I shagged your friend. Buggered that whole situation up, I did. Left town and wasn't there for the Bit when Ducks got shot. Wasn't there to help when Red lost her bloody mind. Never apologized for any shitty thing I did when I was trying to get my chip back." Spike laughed humorlessly.

"Aren't I just a bundle of bloody guilt?" He sighed. "I dunno Xander. I can live with having been an asshole; a vampire that maimed and killed and tortured. That's what vampires do. Angel knew that. But he let the whole soul-having thing warp him. I know everything I've done was wrong. I can see that. I also know that that part of my life is very much in the past."

He sounded wistful and Xander curbed a smile as he continued to rub Spike's scalp. "Once I got this bloody chip in my head, it was all gone. I had to make a new life. And I did. You all helped me make a new life. I may not have liked it as much as my old one, but I was happy. It had perks." He smiled. "I had company. Gets bloody lonely with only an insane bird as company. I finally had someone to talk to. Or at. Cause no one really cared what I had to say. But, if I squinted my eyes almost closed those looks of disgust almost looked like interest."

Xander closed his own eyes in shame. "I'm sorry, Spike." Spike snorted.

"Pish posh, pet. Nothing to be sorry for. It's just that, before, I was only responsible for my own fuckups. After meeting you lot, I kinda felt like…well, like I screwed up your lives right along with mine. Then I went and hightailed it out of town right when everything was at it's worst."

"Shhhh." Xander brushed a stray hair off of Spike's forehead. "We all had a pretty big part in screwing up our own lives. I don't blame you for any of it. I don't hate you."

Spike squeezed his eyes further closed. "Well, I hate me." He whispered. "I wish I could either go back to being the Scourge of Europe and kill everyone that pisses me off, or that I could go back to being just plain William and find my release at the bottom of an inkwell. Being in the middle is killing me."

Xander dropped a kiss on Spike's nose, startling the vamp into opening his eyes. Blue looked into brown. "You should just accept that you're all three now, Spike. You're still the demon. You're still William. And you're still Spike. You need to learn to live with all of them. You need to find someone who will love all three of them." Spike wondered when love had come into it? He wasn't talking out loud earlier was he? Xander continued, not noticing.

"You tried finding someone to love William. Buffy told us about that Cecily girl. You tried finding someone to love the demon. That only got you tortured by Angel and turned into a babysitter for Dru. You tried finding someone to love Spike. But you chose the bane of your existence: the Slayer. You need to look for someone who will love you for all of you. Every part."

Spike snorted. "Who the hell is going to accept, much less love, all three? Two are polar opposites and the third is so bloody confused it isn't even funny."

Xander smiled down at him. "Well, Spike, that's how you know it's real. Because when you find the person who can love all three, she'll be the one. And she'll show you just how easy it really is."

Spike still looked dubious. "So, is that what you're waiting for? Someone who's going to love the stripper, the Scooby and the Zeppo?"

Xander shot an unreadable look at him before looking away. "I had that, remember? With Anya. And I threw it away. I'm just trying to survive now. To make it through the next day."

Spike reached up and tugged Xander's head down, forcing the boy to look at him. "I don't think you did have that with Anya. She may have liked the stripper in her own bed, but I don't think she shared well with others. I think that's why she kept you in baggy pants and ugly shirts. No woman wants to see their boyfriend look like an add for 'Tour Hawaii', except one who doesn't want to share."

"I also think she hated the whole Scooby thing. She became mortal through accident, but she was well on her way to accepting it. The scoobies reminded her every second of what she lost. She was always one step away from asking you to move away from Sunnydale."

"The only one she really liked was the Zeppo. She could control him. He was her link to normalcy. Her hope for the future. But you hated yourself so much when he came to the forefront that you beat him down most of the time." Spike watched Xander's eyes, hating that he was putting sadness into them. But he also hated that the boy was lying to himself. That he was determined to pine away for the rest of his life because 'the one' got away, when she wasn't even 'the one' to begin with.

Finally, Xander sighed. "Come back to bed, Spike. I feel the need to hold and be held." Spike didn't even hesitate. The sexual tension had dissipated. All that was left was comfort. For the moment, that was all either of them had to give.

---

When they woke again, it was nighttime. There was no uncomfortable silence. There was no seduction. They simply smiled at each other and gently kissed…just once and only for a brief second. It was enough. Xander suggested they find somewhere to get blood for Spike's dinner and then began flipping through a leather covered address book.

"My boss is actually half Hartuan. He's got a pretty good handle on places that cater to demons."

Spike nodded, glad to know his instincts weren't wrong about the huge man from the night before. "So, what's on the agenda for tonight, pet?"

Xander glanced up at him, looking as though a thought were on the tip of his tongue. He carefully set the book down and turned to face the vampire. Spike tensed out of habit. "Well, actually, I was wondering if you wanted a job."

Spike looked at him incredulously. "A job?"

Xander nodded. "Yeah, Mogar…that's my boss…has been looking for a replacement dancer ever since Keith quit. I thought you might be interested in the position. I mean, you have experience and you have nothing else going on, right?"

Spike tilted his head. "You want me to dance."

Xander picked up the book again. "Never mind, it was a stupid idea."

Spike forcefully took the book out of Xander's hands and stared into his face. "Do you want me to dance?"

The brunette shrugged. "I think you'd be amazing. You can turn someone on just by walking into a room. I can just imagine what you'd do if you tried to get someone hard."

Spike watched the boy's expression for a moment longer. "Okay."

Brown eyes widened. "Really?"

"Yeah, why not? I need a bit of dosh to repay you for the blood you're going to get me and the place to crash last night."

Xander's face closed off momentarily. "I don't want your money, Spike. I have plenty. Consider last night and dinner tonight a gift." Spike's lip twitched.

"What's got you so riled up, pet?"

Xander glared. "What exactly do you think that last night was about?"

"I dunno, luv. As I recall, I asked you that very same thing…last night."

Xander snatched the book back. "Well, it wasn't about pity."

"So what was it about then?"

Xander flushed. "What? Do you think you're the only one who's lonely?"

Spike tugged the boy down onto the couch. "Are you lonely, Xan?"

Xander turned huge brown pools of misery on him. "I didn't think so until last night." He whispered. "Being with you brought back feelings I thought I'd gotten rid of."

"Like what?"

"Need. For closeness, for laughter, for someone to share my day with, for someone to hold when I went to sleep, for someone to still be there when I woke up." He sat up abruptly, shaking Spike's hands off of him. "I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. It's not like I got any of those things from you before. I don't know why I'm so fixated on getting them from you now."

Spike sat quietly, letting the human sort out his emotions in quasi-privacy. Finally, Xander turned back to him. "I don't know why I feel this way. I don't know why it's so different with you now. All I do know is I like you. I missed you in some strange way. I'm glad you're here, and I'd like if you'd stay for a while."

Spike chose his words carefully. "Are you asking me to move in with you, Xander?" The boy nodded. "If I do, and I'm not saying I will," he added quickly at the hope rising in Xander's eyes. "But, if I do, I'll expect to be able to pay my way. I don't take charity. I'll take on half of your bills and half of the housekeeping."

Xander grinned. "Wow, I never thought I'd hear William the Bloody demand to dust." Spike smacked him gently on the back of the head.

"Watch it, whelp." He smiled back.

Xander hesitated for a moment, and then rushed on before he lost his nerve. "Will you share my bed?"

Spike caught his non-existent breath. "I-"

"Please? We don't have to have sex. I just…I need…I'd like you to be there." The pleading in Xander's eyes was his undoing.

He acquiesced. "Alright, luv."

Xander's smile was like a glimpse of the long forgotten sun. Spike later thought that he would have agreed to anything just to see that smile. The boy practically bounced to his feet.

"Let's just go see Mogur. We can kill two birds with one stone that way."

---

Mogar looked the blonde vampire up and down. "Well, Xan, vampires are always a popular choice as dancers. They tend to be sensuous creatures as a rule. They also love attention focused on them. The only problem is they are also short tempered and prone to kill the first customer who touches them wrong or talks bad about their dancing."

Spike straightened his duster. "That won't be a problem with me, mate."

Mogar didn't look convinced. Spike sighed. "A few years ago, I had a run in with a bunch calling themselves The Initiative." He was startled to see Mogur flinch and dart his eyes around the room as though hunted. "I see you've heard of them."

The half demon nodded. "Bastards got my father. Wanted me, but my mother ran. We wound up here, half a continent away from everything we'd ever known." The rage in his eyes was close to sparking. Spike eased down on the vamp dominance, knowing any provocation could set the huge man off.

"Yeah, well they caught me too, mate."

Mogur narrowed his eyes. "So how did you get away?"

"Didn't really get away." He clenched his jaw in remembrance. "They put a behavior modification chip in my head. It won't allow me to hurt humans. Gives me a right good shock to the noggin if I so much as pinch one."

Mogur looked outraged. "How do you feed?"

"Animal blood mostly." Mogur made a moue of disgust. Spike smirked. "Yeah, kinda feel that way about it myself."

"I can get you human, if you're interested."

Spike grinned. "That's what Xan-pet said."

Mogur nodded and reached behind the bar to scribble an address down. "Just tell 'em I sent you." He grinned evilly. "You'll get a discount."

Spike took the address and stuffed it in his coat. "Ta, mate. Now about this job…"

Mogur shrugged. "Why not. Always looking to help out a fellow demon. And Xander vouches for you, so I trust I won't have any problems." Spike held out his hand. The half demon enveloped it in a strong grip. "Welcome aboard, Spike. Glad to have you."

---

"We have a new piece of eye candy for your viewing pleasure tonight." Mogur's voice boomed across the room, stilling conversation. "He calls himself Spike." With that, the half demon walked offstage and the lights dimmed. Xander wiggled in his seat in anticipation.

When the beat began to thrum out of the speakers. Xander nearly spewed beer out of his nose. Adrian patted him on the back. "You okay Xan?" he asked in concern. Xander nodded, trying to keep from choking. I Need You Tonight? Was Spike trying to get molested? "What's wrong?" Xander just shook his head and focused on the stage where a spotlight had just touched Spike.

He had chosen to leave off the stark black look. Xander loved how ethereal he looked with contrasting pale skin and dark clothes, but he had to admit, this was pretty hot, too. Spike wore red leather pants and a blood red silk shirt. His hair was slicked back as usual and Xander was pleased to see Spike had taken his advice about the boots. There was something very sexy about Spike in bare feet and skintight leather.

Then he started to move. Preternatural grace enhanced the vampire's movements until it looked as though Spike were not just moving from step to step, rather melting from one move into another. He flowed seamlessly, teasing the audience with every part of his body. His eyes lured them in, his mouth made promises one could only pray that he would keep. The long pale column of his neck begged to be licked from chest to chin. His arms beckoned, his fingers danced against his flesh in an erotic rhythm.

His hips undulated to the beat, and onlookers searched the air beside him for the invisible partner. His legs stretched on forever, promising endless inches to wrap around that partner's waist. Xander felt his mouth go dry. And then the vampire started taking things off.

Spike caressed each button with long pale fingers, dragging a low moan from Xander's throat. After the last button was pulled from it's buttonhole, Spike let the shirt hang open. Each move allowed a pale tan nipple to peek out. He sank to the floor, bending his supple body backwards, and arching his spine to put his profile in stark relief. The silk fluttered off of his shoulders and pooled on the stage. He continued to thrust his hips into the air, against that invisible partner, as the beat stoked him higher.

In a fluid motion, Spike righted himself. He began tracing his fingers over his leather-clad ass and hips, twisting to the thrum of the bass. He drew patterns over the marble hardness of his chest and dipped his hand into the waistband of his pants. Pulling his hand from its delicious hidey-hole, he began to bend forward. He allowed that hand and it's twin to smooth trails down the slick leather covering his legs until he ran his fingertips over his toes.

In a single swift motion, he grasped the hems of the pants and jerked. The Velcro gave and the pants came off. Spike slid his bare foot out of the last bit of leather and stood clad in a leather thong and his trademark smirk. He strutted to the very edge of the stage and fished an ice cube out of Xander's drink. Xander stared openmouthed, his breath coming in short pants.

Spike laid a shining, wet line up the center of his belly with the dripping cube. He detoured to each nipple, forcing them into stiff peaks. He brought it up the line of his neck and ran it over his pink lips. As the music drew to a close, he leaned over, dropped the ice cube back into Xander's glass and then descended to his knees in front of him.

The last thing Xander saw before the lights dimmed to black was Spike's ice blue eyes shining in mischief.


Chapter Five

**Notes: The song is Possession by Sarah McLachlan.

Xander pushed the door open to the dressing room. He walked through; rows of lockers on one side, mirrored make up walls on the other. He smiled at the other dancers who spoke to him, clapping some on the shoulder, but didn't deviate from his goal. There, at the end…a blonde head lifted up suddenly from a bent position and Spike wiggled his foot in his boot to make sure he'd be comfortable.

Xander stopped where he was and leaned against the lockers. When Spike finally noticed him, the vamp gave a tiny smile. He finished up getting dressed and shrugged into his duster. Grabbing his smokes off of the table, he made his way through the half naked bodies to Xander's side.

"Hey, Spike! Fuckin' awesome show, dude!" a shaggy haired blonde called out. Spike nodded in thanks. The man gave Spike a thumbs-up and Xander fought back a snort of laughter as Spike forced himself to reply in kind. Shaggy boy's comment was repeated in different forms the length of the room.

When the vampire reached Xander, the human threw a companionable arm around his shoulders and led him out the back door. Xander kicked the door shut behind them and whirled on Spike. He shoved him up against the back wall of the Dungeon and gave in to the ache he'd been feeling all night. He took a single moment to pin Spike still with his eyes and then plundered the vampire's mouth.

Spike hit the wall with a startled yip he was instantly embarrassed about. But the embarrassment was forgotten instantly as Xander's chocolate eyes bored into his own. He felt the surge of stolen blood through his veins as Xander's lips touched his. It wasn't a gentle kiss. The human had obviously been pushed to the limits of his control. But Spike thought it was perfect. Xander's teeth ground against his lips as the boy forced Spike's mouth open.

Spike gave in happily, allowing Xander to run tongue across teeth, exploring every crevice of Spike's mouth. When Xander had mapped every millimeter, he turned to Spike's tongue. Spike ceased being submissive and returned the exploration. A sensuous duel occurred between the warm cavern of Xander's mouth and the cool cavern of Spike's. Xander's hands came up to cup Spike's face and tangle fingers in the platinum blonde hair. Spike's hands crept around Xander's waist and came to rest on Xander's jean clad ass.

Spike dug fingers into the denim and pulled Xander's hips into his own. Their erections ground into each other, drawing a matched set of moans. Finally, the need for air drove Xander to release his hostage. He gazed, heavy lidded and panting at a thoroughly debauched Spike. The blonde hair was tousled from Xander's fingers, the usually pale lips were bruised and full and slightly parted. Spike's own eyes were glazed over with a sheen of lust and need.

Xander smiled and placed one single gentle kiss on those bruised lips, soothing the damage done in the heat of the moment. "You ever dance like that for anyone else, blondie, and I'll…"

Spike shuddered at the abrupt change from brutal to gentle. "And you'll what, luv?" He whispered huskily.

Xander pushed harder against him, grinding his hard on into Spike's thigh. "And I won't be happy."

Spike grinned slowly. "Promise?"

Xander mock growled at him. "Let's go home, blondie."

---

The next few weeks were a bizarre mix of the most enjoyable time either of them could recall, and the most frustrating. They got into a routine of waking in early evening and lying in bed together, snuggling and kissing gently until they were both awake and very horny. Eventually, one of them would realize it was going too far and call a halt. One would shower while the other started breakfast. Then they would trade off and sit down to TV while they ate. One would then wash dishes while the other tidied up the house.

Afterwards, they would head out to a bar for a round of pool or to a theater for a movie. At the bar, they would take turns eyeing each other's ass and making silly bets about the outcomes of the game. It usually wound up heating them up to the point of tearing each other's clothes off. At the movies, they would cuddle in the back of the theater and hold hands. That usually resulted in sweet gentle romance that made both of them long for something neither was willing to put a name to.

Neither mentioned the line they would not cross. They just knew it was there. When the feelings became too strong, when they began to think of consummating the friendship they had begun, when thoughts of long term came to mind…they pushed each other away. Then they longed for each other.

After the 'boy's night out' they would head into work. Some nights Xander danced, some nights Spike did. On rare occasions, they both danced the same nights and Mogar noticed a trend. On those nights, the tips the boys made were astronomical, as were the deposits from the bar and the door charges. As a matter of fact, they were nearly double that of nights the boys danced singly. It seemed that each had developed a following. As an entrepreneur, Mogar could hardly respect himself in the morning if he didn't find a way to take advantage of that.

"You want us to dance together?" Xander repeated. "On stage at the same time?"

Mogar nodded, his large teeth flashing in his large head. "It'll be great! So, you'll do it."

Spike smirked. "Well, mate. I didn't really hear the question mark on the end of that last part."

Mogar nodded. "That's cause it wasn't there. You have a week to plan something. I want you up there together next Saturday."

---

They finally decided on a song by right of accident. Wandering through the mall late one evening, they stopped by a music store. After an hour of 'how bout this?' and 'naw, don't really like that' they were ready to strangle each other. Xander bit back a growl and stuffed his last suggestion back in the slot.

"I have an idea."

Spike raised an eyebrow, waiting.

"How about we dance to the next song these guys play on the speakers?"

Thinking a moment, Spike eventually nodded and they stood, side by side and arms crossed, staring at the speakers. Then…it played. They stood, transfixed by the lyrics, moved by the beat. Unconsciously, they moved closer together and leaned into each other. When the song ended, they turned slowly to each other and smiled.

Practice was a bit more difficult. It required they do all of the things they'd been avoiding for the last few weeks: touch previously forbidden areas, make promises with their bodies, and act as though it were all foreplay. After practice, they always spent some time apart, beating their heads against the wall in different rooms and berating themselves for being too cowardly to just come out and admit what they felt.

And then, it was Saturday.

They decided to forgo their usual pre-work rituals and headed straight for The Dungeon. They sat watching the club fill up, nursing beers. As the performance time grew closer, they headed into the dressing room and parted ways. Xander opened his locker and reverently pulled out his costume. During one of the times Spike was getting ready for his set, Xander had snuck out and purchased 'the outfit.'

Choosing the color had been the most difficult. Eventually, the salesclerk, a Goth girl with at least a dozen visible piercings, had sighed and handed him the midnight blue. When he had still vacillated, she took it from him and rang it up. After that, it had been easy to find the trimmings.

The silk of the shirt caressed his broad chest and whispered across the silver hoops in his nipples. Every now and then, a glint of the rings or a flash of tanned flesh could be seen through the strategically placed slits in the fabric. The shirt was tucked into leather pants that zipped up the sides. All the way up…both sides. His thong was practically non-existent. He figured if he held his hands in front of his crotch, he'd be arrested for public nudity. He added a hoop to his belly button and put studs in his ears. Slicking his hair back with sparkly gel completed the picture. He headed out to find Spike.

Spike had his own secrets. He had to admit the fashion of the 80's was nothing like today. He had enough trouble stealing outfits from the other dancers on a nightly basis. He refused to dance with Xander wearing something that had caressed another man's dick. So, he'd paid Matthew to get him something sexy to dance in.

The man was well worth his money, although Spike could have done without the color. When Matt found out this was Spike's first dance with someone, he got quirky. He came back with white leather and diamonds for the 'virgin' and the most indecently tiny red thong he could find, for Spike to 'pop his cherry in.' After being threatened with bodily harm, Matthew ran from the room snickering and catcalling.

Spike tied the thong on and slipped into the low-riding pants. "Bloody breeze flowing through my dangly bits," he grumbled as he discovered the latticework of laces keeping his pants on. White x's scrolled down his legs, leaving little triangles of porcelain white skin exposed. His leather vest was more like a leather bra, he thought. It didn't quite cover his midriff and left his arms and shoulders bared.

He found that wasn't a problem though, as Matt had 'thoughtfully' provided jewelry for him. He had crystal ladened armbands to strap around his biceps and a string of crystal beads to sling across the bare expanse of skin on his stomach. He added the crystal studs in his ears and spiked his hair. The door opened and an arm snaked in. On the end of the arm was a gorgeous, supple, white leather duster to match the black one that was his trademark.

Spike snatched it out of Matt's hands and shrugged it on. Still growling, he went to look for Xander.

---

Those in the hallway would later say that seeing Xander and Spike catch sight of each other was like watching a firestorm. One minute, there was a gentle breeze between them, then the wind picked up and the flames grew until everything standing between the two was consumed in the heat. Xander and Spike continued to walk toward each other as though on autopilot. Brown eyes never left blue. When they met in the center of the hall, they smiled shyly at each other.

Soon, Mogar poked his head behind the curtain and waved them forward. Taking up positions, they waited for the first beats of the music to begin. The spotlight flared on and picked Xander out of the darkness. He began to sway, hips finding the rhythm as his arms painted the picture of the lyrics. He closed his eyes and allowed himself to feel the music flow through him.

~Listen as the wind blows
From across the great divide
Voices trapped in yearning
Memories trapped in time~

A second spotlight illuminated Spike, the white leather on pale flesh making him seem ethereal as he whirled across the stage, duster splaying out behind him. He slid to a stop behind Xander, backs to one another, and captured the beat opposite Xander. Together, they played the song out on their bodies.

~Night is my companion
And solitude my guide
Would I spend forever here
And not be satisfied~

Spinning as one, they met chest to chest, Xander mere inches taller in bare feet. Spike slid his hands over Xander's waist and hips as Xander pushed his own hands beneath the duster. He reverently pushed the soft leather from the vampire's shoulders and tossed it away. Howls met his actions, but neither man heard them. Spike brought a hand up to cup Xander's face and slid back behind Xander, trailing that hand over the human's neck as he traced his mark across Xander's stomach with the other.

~And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
And after I
Wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes, dear~

Xander's head fell back in submission, pulling a growl from deep within Spike's throat. Spike reached around Xander's chest, molding his crotch to Xander's ass…forcing the boy into a rhythm he chose… as he felt for the tiny buttons on the silk shirt. The growl grew as the silk defied him. With a jerk, he ripped the buttons free and bared Xander's skin. He nuzzled the boy's neck in satisfaction.

~And through this world I stumble
So many times betrayed
Trying to find an honest word
To find the truth enslaved~

Xander slid forward and let the silk fall from his arms, he caught it on his hands and wrapped them in it. Holding his bound hands high above his head, he danced a circle back to Spike a knowing grin on his face. Spike moved up to meet him but then dropped into a crouch. A cool, wet tongue traced a path from Xander's leather, across his tense stomach muscles, and up to the hollow of his throat.

~Oh you speak to me in riddles
You speak to me in rhymes
My body aches to breathe your breath
Your words keep me alive~

Xander moaned quietly and placed his hands on either side of Spike's face and drew him up. He grasped the clasps on Spike's vest with visibly trembling fingers and fumbled with them. Spike reached up to help him, their fingers tangling, touching even as they undid the clasps. The music ceased to be the thing they were dancing to and began to wend its way through their bodies. It pulled them together and pushed them apart. It called this hand to that hip, that mouth to this bare chest. Neither man even noticed the stage anymore. They were alone, seducing each other to the husky voice in their heads and the thrumming beat in their blood.

~And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
And after I
Wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes, dear~

Spike leaned Xander backwards, supporting him with the strength of only one arm. The boy spilled over that arm with no hesitation, trust evident in every sinew of his body as he bared his throat, his belly, to the predator who held him. Spike ran a nail over the tanned skin, smiling at Xander's shudder, and headed for the zippers holding the human's pants on. The first one unzipped, Spike jerked Xander back up against his body and slid him across his own pinking flesh into his other arm. He repeated the move that unzipped the pants and moved his hands up to Xander's armpits. In a slight show of vamp strength, he lifted the boy straight up and out of the leather, allowing him to melt down his body and puddle at his feet.

~Into this night I wander
It's morning that I dread
Another day of knowing of
The path I fear to tread~

Xander crawled his way to a kneeling position and reached around Spike's waist to clutch the vamps ass in the white leather. His dark hands contrasting against it and his mouth hovered over the bulge in the front of the pants…allowing dark hair to lay starkly against white leather. He tugged at the laces, loosening one eyelet after another. As the pants were slowly opened, they fell away from Spike's pale flesh. He kicked out of them and pulled Xander back to his feet.

~Oh into the sea of waking dreams
I follow without pride
Nothing stands between us here
And I won't be denied~

Spiraling slowly around each other, they had eyes for no one else. Their faces so close, their bodies brushing from shoulder to knee, their motions mirroring each other, they looked like two halves of the same person. Their hands fluttered over each other's skin, claiming it with feather light touches.

~And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
And after I
Wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes.~

As the music ended, Spike reached up and grasped the back of Xander's head. A simple tug and their lips met. The lights went out as their arms joined into the embrace. The howls began again, as well as thunderous applause, but neither man paid any attention. They walked each other off of the stage, never breaking their kiss. Matt stood in the wings, waiting to congratulate them, and smiled to himself as he saw their position.

He gently nudged them apart, much to Spike's displeasure and Xander's chagrin, and steered them to the dressing rooms. He practically threw their clothes at them and told them to go home. With matching grins, the boys did exactly as he ordered.


He nudged them apart, much to Spike's displeasure and Xander's chagrin. He guided them back to the dressing room, threw their clothes at them and ordered them home. With matching grins, the boys left.

Chapter Six

Spike supposed they were very lucky to be in New Orleans and not on the Hellmouth with as much attention as they were paying to the world around them. Every few feet, one of the boys would stop to pull the other into a long, passionate kiss. Every time they went past a light pole or a building with walls near the sidewalk, one would shove the other against the unyielding surface and plunder the other's mouth.

The trip home took nearly three times as long as usual. When they finally made it to the house, they fell through the doorway, kicking the door shut on the way. Only then did they pause. Xander looked at the man beneath him, eyes glazed with desire, lips swollen and parted, a flush to the normally pale skin. Xander raised a hand to hover over the vampire's face and Spike turned into it.

"You are so beautiful," Xander whispered, running a single finger down the other man's cheek. Spike shook his head.

"Not nearly as gorgeous as you, luv," he returned then captured the questing finger.

"I…I want you. Tonight. Please." Xander heard the pleading in his voice and for once didn't care. Spike blinked some of the haze from his eyes and focused.

"Why?"

Xander looked incredulous. "Why? You have to ask why?" He laughed.

Spike cocked his head to the side. "Yeah. I think I do." Xander was thrown back to their first meeting with those words. He rolled off of the blonde and propped his head up on his left hand as he allowed his right to continue playing with Spike's duster.

"I want you because you excite me. Because you make me feel…gorgeous. Because you make me mad, you make me smile; you make me look at who I am and what I want. I looked. I decided. It's you."

Spike stared seriously at him. "Not because I'm all you have left of your past and you're holding on with a death grip? Not because you think I'll leave if you don't prove something to me? Not because-"

Xander silenced him with a gentle kiss. "Spike. You are the best thing that's happened to me in the last year." He chuckled. "Or more. I want you cause I want you. I want to feel your mouth on me." He demonstrated by dragging his lower lip across Spike's cheek. Spike shuddered and his eyes closed.

"I want to feel your weight on my chest." He rolled back up to straddle Spike. "I want to feel your hands exploring every inch of me." He unbuttoned the vampire's shirt and pushed it aside, exposing pale skin in the moonlight. Spike opened his eyes to find Xander gazing down at him with a tiny smile. "Beautiful." He placed a finger on Spike's lips to forestall any response.

"I want to feel your tongue tasting me." He bent down and ran a wet line up Spike's belly and over his chest. Spike shivered and imagined what the boy would taste like. "I ache for you, Spike." Xander whispered, holding Spike's gaze. "I ache to feel you in me. To be in you. To sleep, naked and sated in your arms while I re-live making love with you in my dreams."

Spike tried to speak, but what came out was a moan. He cleared his throat and tried again. "But what about tomorrow, luv?" Xander crossed his arms on Spike's chest and brought his face closer.

"What about it?" He smiled. "Tomorrow, I get to wake up wrapped around you. No awkward moments. No regrets. Maybe if I'm really good, we'll get to do it again." He nibbled on Spike's chin. The vamp still looked upset. Xander tilted his head. "What's wrong, Spike? Why won't you tell me?" He sat up a little. "Is it me? You just don't want me?" The anger flashed hot and bright in the vamp's eyes.

"Don't you ever think that, Xander Harris." He growled. "I want you. I want you badly. I just…" He took a deep cleansing breath. "I've never really had a friend before, Xander. But I think I've found one in you." He cupped the human's cheek in his hand. "I don't want to bugger this up. I don't want to lose the only friend I've had in 120 years."

Xander nuzzled his cheek into Spike's hand. "You won't lose me, Spike." He placed a gentle kiss in the vampire's palm. "But I'll wait if you want me to. I'll wait for as long as you need. For as long as it takes to prove to you that you're worth loving." He climbed off of the vamp and held a hand out.

Spike stared at him, wide eyed. Did he know what he just said? Was it a slip of the tongue? Or a platitude? Could he…mean it? Xander laughed. "Come on, blondie. I only bite if you ask me to." Spike shook the questions away and reached up to grab Xander's hand. Xander tugged him up and released his hand with a quick squeeze. "Turn on the TV. I'll make popcorn."

---

"So what exactly are we doing here?" Spike asked looking around the darkened room with a questioning raise of his eyebrow. Xander placed a finger to his lips and led him to a tiny table in the back. They maneuvered around quietly chatting, darkly clad, and frighteningly pale people. Spike had to actively listen for heartbeats, so certain was he that his goofy boy had led them into a vamp haven.

Xander wriggled into the small seat and picked up one of the candles burning in the center of the table. He sniffed it and nodded appreciatively. Holding it out to Spike, he choked back a snicker at the look on the vamps face: pure bewilderment. "I thought you might enjoy something less manly than playing pool and drinking beer all night." He whispered.

Another rise of the eyebrow.

Xander smiled and leaned his head in closer to the blonde vamp. "You once told Buffy you were a poet." Wariness began to creep into Spike's eyes. "I am not, by any means, a poet. So, I thought this might be the best place to learn about it." Spike stilled and glanced around the room again.

Then it clicked. He was at one of those poetry reading/expressionistic art clubs he'd read about on the society page of the paper. Xander brought him here? He scrunched his brow up. Why?

~Well, you nonce, he just told you why.~ His snarky inner voice prodded.

And he had, Spike realized. 'To learn about it.' But why would he want to lean about poetry? The boy hated school. Hated English class. Didn't even really like limericks. But Xander liked him. For me? Xander did this for me?

~Idiot tosser.~ His voice sighed. ~Of course he did it for you. You went on and on about your fluffy bunny side.~

Bugger that. He wasn't an aristocratic pouf anymore. He wanted nothing to do with William's world anymore. He was strictly in the mangle and kill world of Spike now.

~Snort.~

Did you just say snort?

~And so how do you explain that bothersome soul, there Spike m'boy? Last I heard, and I do have it on good authority, you weren't as all about the mangling and killing as the Spike of old.~

So, what? The whelp is feeling sorry for poor William, buried for all of these years under nasty old Spike?

~Sigh. Pull your head out of your arse, mate. He's spent years getting to know Spike. Then Spike goes and gets all souled and out pops William again, who he's never really known existed. Now he's trying to understand William.~

Why would he want to?

~Because William is a part of you, arsewipe!~

A part of me. Spike closed his eyes and a tiny smile sneaked onto his lips. He wants to know the other parts of me. What the bloody hell are you doing to me, Xander Harris?

"Spike?" A tentative touch on his arm, a whispered voice in his ear…the breath teasing wisps of his hair. He shuddered.

"Yeah?" He turned to look at the brunette. Xander had a worried look on his face.

"Did I do something wrong? Is this too way out there for you? Cause we can leave." Ah, Xander-babble was beginning.

"No, luv." Spike gave him a chaste kiss on the cheek and a smile that warmed every molecule in Xander's body. "This is perfect."

---

"And the blood of Mother Moon drips from my lips, seeding all around me with desiccation and despair…" Spike stood on a bench and belted out the prose, one hand on his heart, the other stretched out in supplication to 'Mother Moon.' Xander stood below clutching his stomach and wiping tears from his eyes.

"Spike, stop! You're killing me!" He laughed, finally collapsing onto his ass as the vampire looked down his long nose, snobbishly.

"Ignorant buffoon! Have you no appreciation for the finer arts? Now where was I…" He paused a moment, then struck his pose again. "Blah, blah, blah…desiccation and despair …And my brothers and sisters of the night, they crawl around me, licking the fluid of evil as it flows down my chest. They imbibe my despair…perpetuate the desiccation…and join me in the darkness."

He dropped his head suddenly and stood quietly for a moment, the only sound Xander's hysterical laughter. Eventually, even the strongest man swayed beneath the vision of a happy Xander. And so Spike's stoic face began to slide off and his lips began to twitch. Soon, he was guffawing along with the gasping human.

"So," Xander sucked in a breath, "Are all poets like that?" Spike rolled his eyes.

"I don't know what the bloody hell he was doing with all of those props. In my day, the staples of a writer were pencil, paper, and a pair of reading glasses. I have no idea what all that dancing around and flinging cherry Kool-Aid was about." Xander chuckled again as he recalled the look of utter distaste on Spike's face when the poet began pouring the red liquid down his ruffled, white shirt.

"So, how am I supposed to learn about poetry if that is my example?" He sighed dramatically. Spike mock punched him and hauled him to his feet.

"I'll teach you myself." Xander's eyes lit up.

"You'd do that? The Big Bad would teach me to like poetry?" Spike ducked his head in sudden embarrassment.

"Yeah, whatever. Don't make such a deal about it. S'only bloody words. Besides," Xander could have sworn the vampire was blushing. "I'd do anything you asked me to."

Spike waited with bated breath to see what kind of ears his words would fall on. He'd almost given up and mentally kicked himself when his chin was lifted up and a gentle kiss placed on his lips. He opened his eyes to a chocolate brown gaze, brimming with unspoken emotion.

"I have just the plan for the rest of the night. If you still trust me after that." He hitched his head back towards the poetry club and grinned. Spike just nodded. He trusted Xander. Bloody hell, of course he did. He loved him.

---

"Go. Shoo. Go pick us up something to eat." Xander laughed shoving Spike down the sidewalk with a hand at the small of the vampire's back. Spike looked warily at him, but wordlessly did as Xander asked. Once Spike was out of sight, Xander darted into the store he'd found on one of his forays around the city in the first few weeks of living in New Orleans.

He met back up with Spike, carrying his own bag of goodies, a few minutes later. "Off to the park." Xander linked his arm into Spike's. Spike rolled his eyes, but smiled and led them down the street.

"So, luv, what's the plan?" The blonde asked as Xander plopped under a huge tree near a gently glowing park lamp. Xander patted the ground next to him and began rummaging through the bag of food Spike bought. Spike sighed and folded his legs under him, sinking to the ground.

When Xander had his 'picnic' set up he reached into his own bag and pulled out a book. Spike just looked at him. "I want you to read to me."

Xander nearly laughed at Spike's confusion. "Poetry." He clarified. "It's a book of poetry. I want you to read it to me." He placed a gentle finger under the older man's chin. "I want to hear you read it to me. I want to hear it the way it should be read. I want to talk about it with you. I want you to teach me."

Spike blinked. Blinked again. Then gingerly reached out and took the book with shaking fingers. "I-I don't know if I can, Xan." He whispered, carefully holding the symbol of a life he had spent 100 years trying to eradicate.

Xander stroked his cheek. "If you can't, you don't have to. I didn't mean to dredge up the bad stuff, Spike."

Spike smiled painfully. "It's not all that bad. I…I've actually missed literature. Not a whole lot of thought-provoking articles in 'those' mags, don't care what they say." Obviously steeling himself, he sucked in a huge breath and held the book to his chest. "I would be honored to share this with you Xander Harris." He announced.

Xander leaned over and nuzzled his face into the vampire's neck. "Thank you." He shifted until he was lying with his head in Spike's lap, looking up at the ethereal blonde. "So, what do I need to know to appreciate this stuff?"

---

"Oh, Xan, this is one of my favorites." Spike nearly bounced. Xander could feel his heart swelling with pride as Spike became more and more excited with each page turned.

"What is it?" He asked lazily, totally content.

"It's by a bloke named William Ernest Henley. Here's a piccie of him. Well, of a drawing of him, anyway." Xander craned his neck to look at the book Spike was holding upside down. He nodded.

"So what'd he write?"

"It's a poem called Invictus. He wrote it bout five years before I was turned. He was in a Scotland hospital gettin' his leg chopped off." Xander looked up at him with 'eww' written all over his face. Spike laughed. "He had a kind of tuberculosis. It affected his bones. He was crippled and they had to amputate his leg to save him."

"Oh. Well, okay. Less eww then." Spike bumped his knee against Xander's head affectionately. "So? You just gonna tell me horror stories or are you gonna read the thing to me?"

Spike cleared his throat, nervously and darted his eyes from Xander's face to the book until Xander took pity on him and closed his eyes. With a thankful smile Xander couldn't now see, he began shakily, but soon lost himself in the rhythm of the poem and the power of the words.

"Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever Gods may be
For my unconquerable soul."

Xander loved Spike's voice. Pure, husky, turning every word into lyrical bliss. But this? This was amazing. Had he never been told about Spike's past, he would have known the man had been a poet. The words dropped from his lips like precious icons, each one worshipped.

"In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed."

Xander smiled a tiny smile. Had William patterned Spike after this poem? Had Angelus known what he was up against when Drusilla turned the mousy poet? He could see why Dru liked William. Spike's passion simmered under the surface usually bursting free in fits of rage. But Xander could hear that same passion welling up now, in William, as his voice painted pictures in Xander's mind.

"Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid."

Ah, what a bitter foreshadowing of the Spike he had come to know. The Spike bent under the weight of the Initiative, under the weight of his newfound soul. No, love, no more fear. Never again, he promised.

"It matters not how straight the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate.
I am the captain of my soul."

Spike stopped reading, slightly embarrassed as Xander continued to lay unmoving on his lap, lips adorned with that adorable smile. He cleared his throat. Xander opened eyes shining with shared pain, with understanding, with acceptance.

"More?" He whispered. Spike nodded, and Xander nestled down into his lap.

---

"Xan, luv?" Spike leaned down to Xander's ear. "It's getting lighter."

Xander opened his eyes in disappointment. He could have lay there forever listening to that addicting voice. Reluctantly, he sat up. "Okay, we'll get going. But first I want to give you something."

Spike smiled. "Luv, I think you've given me plenty tonight."

Xander shook his head as he rummaged through his bag again. "Nope. Besides, this is totally selfish on my part." He triumphantly pulled a leather bound book out of the bag and presented it to Spike.

"What's this then?"

"It's a journal. An empty one which I would like you to fill with self written poetry that you will then read to me."

Spike frowned. "You realize they called me William the Bloody because of my poetry not my fangs, right?"

Xander smiled. "Don't care. Just want something from your head. From your heart. From…"

He trailed off, but Spike picked it up anyway. "From my soul?" He finished quietly.

Xander nodded. Spike took the book reverently into his hands and smiled softly. "I can do that. For you."


Chapter Seven

***Poem by ashley mist malachi.

Xander woke up alone the next afternoon. He sleepily reached for the cool body he'd become accustomed to waking up with, and his hand found only cool sheets. He sat up quickly, a moment of panic flaring in his chest. Spike looked up from where he was seated at the tiny table in the room. He smiled at the rumpled bed hair Xander wore.

"Morning, luv." Xander breathed a tiny sigh of relief and gave an answering smile.

"Morning. Whatcha up to?" Spike ducked his head shyly and pulled closer what Xander could now see was the leather bound notebook from yesterday. Xander's smile grew. "You writing me something, blondie?"

Spike nodded and curled around the book. Xander leaned back against the headboard. "It's okay if you don't want me to read it, Spike." He said softly. "I won't pry." Spike frowned.

"It's not that, Xan. I'm just not sure you…would want to see it now." Xander cocked his head. "I-I just mean that I may have said some things that you aren't ready to hear from me yet." He continued, flustered.

Xander nodded again. "If that's what you think, Spike. Like I said. I'll give you your space." He smiled again. "Go on. Finish it. I won't move. Just want to look at you." Spike ducked his head again with a tiny smile and went back to the poem.

~From My Soul~
by Spike/William

He sleeps.
My breath is caught,
Unneeded.
Trapped in my throat.

Gazing upon his beauty,
I feel the cobwebs of the past closing in on me.
Attempting to restrict the view of my future.
The one of which I only dream.

Xander watched the blonde vamp reread what he'd already written. The tip of a pink tongue poked out from between full, pursed lips and Xander gazed adoringly at the expression of utmost concentration on Spike's face. He knew for a fact that he was seeing William, full on. From the shy smiles to the tapping of the pen on blunt non-vampiric teeth, the poet had wrested control of the surface.

To hold his hand,
Pure pleasure bubble up inside of me.
A crystal clear brook,
Babbling, filling my heart.

His presence spills over me,
And I am swept away.
Caught up into the current,
Of spoken, and unspoken desires.

Xander could see Spike's lips moving as his pen scritched each new word. He loved the way the other man would frown, stare at the ceiling, and then turn back to the paper with a vengeance. It was like Spike totally forgot Xander was even in the room. Xander remembered that intensity watching the Big Bad in a fighting fury. It was compellingly similar, though the venues couldn't be any different.

I lie awake.
The memories rush over me.
Like warm ocean waves.
Each surge of realization thrills me.

To be inside him, sated.
To breathe his breath.
To taste of that Heaven
To dance inside the music with him.

Xander wondered what it was that made Spike give a slight shudder, pausing in his writing to briefly close his eyes and bite his lip. He felt that tug in his chest again, this time identifying it as need. He needed to be the one making the vampire shudder; to be the one biting that full, ripe lip. He needed to wrap his arms around the silky flesh, to warm it with his own heat. ~Gods, Xander, pull it together. He doesn't want that. He needs time, not you and your fuck-me looks,~ he chastised himself fiercely.

A silky pull,
His salty-sweet skin
Calling to me, begging me.
To let him in.

I want to begin again.
With him.
Only him.

Aching inside, Xander watched Spike set the pen down and look at his work in satisfaction. "Hey blondie," he called quietly. Spike started as though he'd forgotten he wasn't alone in the room. Xander lifted the covers and beckoned the vamp back to bed. Spike hopped out of the chair then paused. He looked back at the table and set his jaw. Then, he reached for the journal and brought it with him to the bed.

Shucking out of his clothes, down to the boxers he'd slept in, he crawled into the warm nest Xander had made for them. Xan loved how Spike snuggled down into in arms, resting his head on Xander's chest. He glanced over at the book, but didn't say anything. Eventually, Spike nodded against his torso.

"Go on, luv. Read it." He whispered, closing his eyes. Xander dropped a kiss on the blonde curls.

"No."

Spike frowned. "No?"

"Nope. The deal was you fill it up with poetry, or whatever you feel like writing, and then you read it to me." He felt Spike tense. "So, until you're ready to read it to me, I'm not going to read it."

Spike squeezed his eyes shut. Thoughts swirled though his head like snowflakes in a blizzard. But all through his internal storm, one constant remained: Xander. He never stopped touching him, holding him tenderly, stroking his back with a strong, warm hand. Xander never left. Slowly, he sat up against the headboard along with his human and reached for the book.

Xander sat patiently, twining his leg with Spike's. The vamp cleared his throat and opened the book. Xander closed his eyes and leaned his head back, a tiny smile gracing his lips. Spike began to read.

Xander felt the emotion roll over him like a living thing. The pain, the loss, the unhappiness. The hope, the need, the desire. He knew just when Spike had started fearing the past and when he'd decided to let it go, at least for the duration of the poem. He could tell when he'd woken up, when he'd started talking to Spike. It was like being with Xander took away some of the fear he dealt with when he lived in his own thoughts.

He could feel them dancing again, slowly…sensuously. He could feel those gentle, cool hands holding him, supporting him…asking, offering, needing, wanting. He could taste the vampire on his tongue…the taste of his skin, his mouth. And he knew. He wasn't alone in his need. Spike shared every aching moment, every heartbreakingly silent plea to be loved.

The vampire closed the journal and glanced over at the brunette. His eyes widened and he sat upright. "Xan, luv, why are you crying?" Xander opened his eyes and gazed at Spike. He lifted a hand to the vampire's soft cheek and caressed it, loving how Spike leaned into it.

"I'm crying because you are the most amazing man I've ever known. And I'm so unbelievably lucky that you feel the same way about me as I feel about you." Spike's face shuttered.

"And how is that, luv?" Xander leaned in closer, his breath warm on Spike's face, his lips just brushing the vampire's. "I want to begin again, too, Spike. With you."

The blonde released the breath he'd been unconsciously holding and crushed his lips to Xander's. He maneuvered his body around until he straddled the younger man. Xander groaned at feeling his cloth covered cock slide against Spike's own. He ran his hands up Spike's hips, over his back and up to his shoulders, pulling the vamp closer to him. Spike traced dizzying patterns across Xander's chest, circling his nipples and raking gentle nails down sensitive sides.

Impatient to feel Spike totally against him, Xander ran his hands back down the blonde's body and began tugging his boxers off. Not to be outdone, Spike began pulling at Xander's. Both shorts ended up in the same place as the evil covers that separated man from vamp, lover from lover: on the floor. Spike pressed his chest against Xander's upper thighs and grinned wickedly. Slowly, slowly…he slithered up the length of the human's body, thrilling at the whimpers falling from Xander's lips.

He realized he'd caught himself in his own trap when his cock brushed against Xander's sac, soft and warm, and he shuddered. Xander was the one grinning now, as Spike trembled on top of him. The vamp stretched out, full body on body, no part of him touching the bed and suckled the base of Xander's throat.

Xander threw his head back, feeling a strange flutter in his chest at his actions. Spike paused for a moment, overwhelmed by the trust in that one submissive gesture, and then he put himself to the task of marking that tanned flesh. Xander squirmed under him, panting, and Spike braced his toes against the human's. Short, gentle thrusts of cock on cock stared a circle of pleasure. Spike moaned at the friction, Xander moaned at the reverberation of Spike's pleasure against his throat. It sent shivers down his body, increasing the friction.

Eventually, the grinding of his pelvis against Xander's stopped affording him the opportunity to concentrate on Xander's throat. He buried his face in the human's neck and increased the speed of his thrusts, feeling a tingling beginning at the base of his spine. Xander felt Spike's urgency and thrust back in earnest. He felt something move against his shoulder and pulled back to see. Spike's eyes were closed and he looked in pain as his face kept shifting from vamp to human to vamp.

Xander touched the ridges in a tender counterpoint to the rabid pistoning of his hips. When Spike opened his eyes, the irises were golden yellow and he looked panicked. Xander gazed into those golden orbs and. "Please," he whispered, "Don't hide from me." Spike trembled once…twice…then bled into game face, howling as his climax yanked him from coherency. The sight of his lover giving in to the passion, sharing it with him, trusting him to want both parts of him caused Xander to tumble over the precipice with him. His body jerked and he added his own come to the pool growing on his stomach.

Spike collapsed onto Xander's chest and Xander began to run his fingers through the soft blonde hair. A soft purr issued from the vampire's chest and Xander smiled as he closed his eyes. Oh, yes. Only with him.

 

To Be Continued…