Fallen Angels

By Kristi

Pain and Passion

@--Angel--@

“Buffy, come on. Everyone else is waiting!” I yell through the bedroom door.

She cracks open the door and peeks out through the sliver at me. “Angel, ask Cordy to come up. I need opinions of the girl sort.”

“Sure. Who are you and what have you done with my Buffy?” I look at her confused.

She rolls her eyes and tries not to grin at my attempt of humor. “I’m a girl who hasn’t gotten dressed up to go to anything other then a crack house in years. I need help.”

I ponder a moment. “I’ve heard the crack house look is on the way out.” It helps both of us to joke about where she has been and the things she has been through. I think they call it Gallows humor.

“Exactly, however the hooker look is definitely in. So Cordy, quick.” She says with a grin. “And don’t tell her I said that, kidding you know.”

“Right, I’ll go get her.” I lope down the stairs, feeling like an idiot and I love it.

*

She walks down the stairs and my jaw hits the floor. She is wearing black leather pants and some kind of silvery backless, sleeveless, everything less shirt. Her hair falls around her shoulders in a mass of golden curls and I don’t know what Cordy did with her makeup but she is devastatingly beautiful. “Wow,” lame, I know but those are the only words I can form.

“Five bucks,” she holds her hand out to Cordy. Cordy rolls her eyes and digs in her purse.

“You’d think 250 years of seeing women dressed up and the he’d be able to form some other opinion besides Wow.” Cordy snorts and hands Buffy a five dollar bill.

Gun and Fred laugh. I want to come to my own defense, I really do, but then Buffy is standing there and Wow. She leans into me and I close my eyes breathing her in.

“You’re pretty Wow, yourself big guy.” She winks at me and kisses me lightly. I glance down at my own attire, unsure at the moment if I even got dressed. Thankfully, I did. I’m wearing black leather pants and Buffy’s favorite wine colored velvet shirt.

“We ready to roll?” Gunn asks.

Everyone nods in the affirmative and we separate into various cars. Fred and Gunn are with Buffy and I in the GTX, since they live at the hotel. Cordelia and Wesley take his SUV. We’ve all been working hard. It seemed once Buffy was on the team, things just got more demonic but tonight it’s quiet, no visions so far, no clients in need. We’re going to Caritas. Buffy has yet to meet Lorne. I have a slightly ulterior motive for taking her there. I want Lorne to read her.

“So, Lorne, tell me about him.” Buffy says.

“Lorne is an anagogic demon. He reads auras and futures but only when you sing. He owns Caritas, the karaoke demon bar we’re going to.” I explained.

“So are we singing tonight?” She asks me her voice doubtful and questioning.

Gunn laughs in the backseat. “God, we hope Angel doesn’t sing, and if you do, Man, no Manilow. It’s not like I liked his music before, but no one deserves to have their life’s work slaughtered like that.”

Buffy laughs. I love her laugh. “He’s that bad?” She turns around and asks Gunn.

“If you mean oh crap the world is ending badly, no, otherwise, yeah.” Gunn says with a grin.

Buffy wraps her arms around my bicep and my hand trails to her thigh. “It’s okay, you’re still my hero.”

That’s all that matters, in my eyes.

Caritas is already full. There are demons of every description and color here. A Marklar is on the stage destroying She-Bang originally by Ricky Martin. Lorne gets sight of us and waves us over to his table by the bar.

“So this Her?” Lorne asks, looking at Buffy. He whistles. “My, my, my. Darling, I have seen all about you, but I never imagined.” He gets up and hugs Buffy. She looks surprised and I’m not sure if it’s that she’s not used to being hugged by demons, present company excluded, or if it’s Lorne’s silver lame suit.

“’Splainy?” She says looking first at me and then Lorne.

“I don’t know where you were lost, Sweetlips, but Angelcakes here was doing a lot of looking. He came to sing for me a few times. Like I said before, I’ve seen lots of you every time he sings.”

She looks at me a bit uncomfortable. I pull her hand to my lips and kiss her knuckles, which elicits a short verse of “Can you Feel the Love Tonight” from Lorne.

“Drinks for everyone?” Wesley asks. We give him our order and he makes his way through the crowded bar. I let Buffy have two Fuzzy Navels, her drink of choice, before I mention singing to her.

“Up on stage?” She asks me with a dumbfounded look on her face.

“No, Buffy, out in the alley, of course on stage. I want Lorne to read you.”

She watches me for a moment, realizing this is important to me. She rolls her eyes and sighs, “Oh, God this is gonna hurt---everyone in here.”

I chuckle and walk with her to pick a song. She shoos me away. She says she wants to surprise me.

Lorne stands on stage a few minutes later to announce her. “Tonight we have a very special lady that’s going to sing for you all. Buffy, come on up here.”

Buffy walks up timidly on stage. She can slay vampires, face demons, defeat a goddess, and dive to her death. She is scared to sing on stage in front of people. Her voice is nervous as she takes the microphone from Lorne. She waves slightly and takes a deep breath. “I want to apologize to everyone here before I even start.”

I am moved to near tears when she begins singing.

Spend all your time waiting for that second chance

For the break that will make it OK

There’s always some reason to feel not good enough

And it’s hard at the end of the day

I need some distraction or a beautiful release

Memories seep from my veins

Let me be empty and weightless and maybe

I’ll find some peace tonight

In the arms of an angel far away from here

From this cold dark hotel room and the endlessness that you fear

You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie

You’re in the arms of an Angel; may you find some comfort here.

Lorne sits down beside me at the table. “I must say, what she lacks in voice she makes up for with emotion. You’re all over her, Angelcakes.” He is watching me, watch her.

“This isn’t about me, Lorne, read her.” I nod toward my fallen angel on the stage.

“Seeing your reaction is part of reading her.” He says.

So tired of the straight line, and everywhere you turn

There’s vultures and thieves at your back

The storm keeps on twisting, you keep building up the lies

That you make up for all that you lack

That don’t make no difference, escaping one last time

It’s easier to believe

In this sweet madness, oh this glorious sadness

That brings me to my knees

“She’s important, and not just to you. She’s going to be important to everyone. She’s strong. I don’t know how she came back from where she was. She’s still got a long climb but she’ll make it.” Lorne says.

“Anything else?” I look at him, hoping he’ll see what I want him to.

He chuckles. “You and her, Kyrumption. Together you are strong, separated you are weak. Powers had a hand in finding her, in you finding her. But I do not envy the predicament you’re in, having what you want so close and not being able to have it.”

I scowl. “Yeah, tell me about it. Better yet, tell the Powers about it.”

In the arms of an Angel far away from here

From this cold dark hotel room and the endlessness that you fear

You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie

In the arms of an Angel, may you find some comfort here

You’re in the arms of the Angel; may you find some comfort here.

She finishes singing and steps down, her face pink. I meet her at the edge of the stage and kiss her, it deepens, like it always does with her I can never, will never, get enough of her. I pull her closer until I am certain we will become one. Her tiny hands are splayed across my back and she is pulling me closer also. We break apart to the whooping and cheers of many demons.

“So, Green Guy, what color is my aura and do you need to see my palm to read my future?” Buffy asks sitting down at the table.

Lorne chuckles “Sweetheart, you let it all hang out there on stage. I’ve got all I need. I told Angelcakes here, you’re important. You’re very strong, you’ve got a climb ahead of you, but you’ll make it and the Powers had a hand in getting you two back together. “

“So they aren’t going to design some grand demon scheme or loopholes to separate us?” She asks.

“That, I can’t tell. They are the Powers but it looks like their two most powerful warriors working together, are in their best interests.” Lorne says. He seemed sorry he couldn’t promise her more. I know the feeling, one look at her and I want to promise her the world.

@--Buffy--@

My ears and my head are happy when Lorne closes the karaoke stage and does some singing of his own. I am surprised by the beautiful voice he has. This song is particularly sweet and slow. I hold my hand out to Angel.

“Dance with me?”

He smiles and takes my hand in his large, cool one. He leads me out to the dance floor, one hand just on the small of my back and I shiver. I do not know why I love that so much, maybe just because it’s Angel, touching me.

I wind my arms around his neck and try not to remember that the last time I danced with him was at my prom, before he left me. He runs his hands up and down my back as we dance. I look up into those brown eyes that I love so much and I can not help but stand on tiptoe and kiss him.

*

When we get home, I said home, as in his and mine. Ok excuse the rant, that’s just the first time I’ve said that. Anyway, when we get home, I don’t know if it’s the drinks or the dancing or the proximity of Angel, but on the way to the bathroom I stop in front of him. He is sitting on the bed and he is so beautiful. I place my fingers under his chin and turn his face up to mine. It starts out innocent enough. I kiss his forehead, which I love and I know he’s self conscious about; I kiss his closed eyes, his nose, his cheekbones, his chin and end with his gorgeous mouth.

I like to taste his mouth for a little bit before I give in and let him taste mine. I nip at his lips, teasing him much the way he often teases me. Let him see how he likes it. I kiss the corners of his mouth and the center before finally giving in and drowning in his kiss. He pulls me down and I am straddling his hips.

He nips at my neck stopping, as he always does, at his mark. He places a whisper soft kiss over it and then gently suckles at it. I moan and lean into him. I can not help it. That spot is my weakest point. I know he can feel my pulse thrumming there and I know it appeals to the demon in him as much as it does the man and for some reason that excites me.

My hands work their way down the buttons on his shirt of their own accord. My skin feels feverish and I need to feel his coolness against mine. I push his shirt down his broad shoulders and muscled arms. He smoothly unties the one thing holding my slip of a shirt and then there is nothing but skin between our upper bodies. He pulls me closer to him and nuzzles my neck. I can scarcely breathe. Our chests are together and I can feel my heart trip hammering, our heartbeat, because when we are this close it as if he shares mine.

I decide my neck has had enough preferable treatment and begin to nip at the muscles corded in his neck. He tenses. I know this drives him crazy. My hands drift down his beautiful back, stopping to trace the gryphon tattoo. I hook my thumbs in the waist band of his pants and occupy myself with his neck. He does the purr/growl noise that makes me crazy. I bite down where his neck joins his shoulder and he growls. I pull back and return my mouth to his.

He kisses me hard, branding me, claiming my mouth as his own and it’s not until one of his fangs nip my bottom lip and I taste blood that I notice he is in vamp face. He tastes the blood too. He jumps up and dumps me on the floor. He stands with his back to me, apologizing. I can tell he is having a hard time controlling the vamp face because he hasn’t reverted yet. His words still come out around fangs. I hadn’t even noticed it and I’m pretty sure he changed when he growled. It was a very vampy growl.

“Angel, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to let things go so far. I’m sorry, please look at me.” I stand up and slip his shirt on, doing up the buttons quickly.

“It’s okay, just give me a minute.” He is still talking around fangs.

When he finally turns around he is wearing his human face. His eyes look sadder and somehow more tormented. I didn’t mean to do that to him.

“I’m sorry, Angel. I don’t know what I was doing. I forgot and I couldn’t help it. I want you so much. I didn’t mean to let it go that far. I shouldn’t tease you like that.” My voice cracks and I am trying not to cry.

“No, Buffy, it’s okay. I wanted it too. I could have stopped you anytime and I didn’t. We just let things get out of hand. It won’t happen again.” He opens his arms and beckons me into his embrace. “Let’s go to bed. You take the bathroom and change.”

I nod and lock myself in the bathroom. I wash all the makeup off my face and splash myself with cold water. I put on the heaviest pair of sweats and the most concealing long sleeved shirt I have. He says it won’t happen again. I know it will. It always does between us. That’s the pain in our relationship and sometimes I think that’s where the passion comes from.

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