Destiny

By PSUBrat

In Memory of Glenn Quinn who brought to life the wonderful character of Doyle..

Author's note: Chapter contains character death

Quadrangle of Suffering

Cordelia and Angel arrived in the circle much the same way as the others had, in a flash of white light and a clap of thunder. Unlike the humans, they were fairly unaffected by the translocation, and suffered very little disorientation. Angel wrapped his arms around Cordelia to support her as she let her eyes grow accustomed to the darkness and firelight. He, being a vampire, didn't have to wait for his eyes to adjust. At least that was a plus in his column. He could feel Cordelia trembling in his arms and could smell her fear, so he tried to comfort her as best he could. While he waited for her to settle down, he scanned their new surroundings, and that's when he saw the bodies...two of them, lying motionless on the ground. The stench of death and the coppery scent of blood reached his nostrils.

She felt his body stiffen against hers and heard him take an unneeded breath. That's how she knew something was wrong. "Angel?" She asked, looking up at him. "What's wrong?"

Slowly, he looked down at her. His face betrayed the anguish at what he had seen. "Have your eyes adjusted to the dark well enough yet?"

"Well enough for what?" She questioned as she tilted her head and frowned.

"To walk."

"Yeah, I guess so. Why? What's wrong?"

He continued to look down into her face. How was he going to prepare her for the horror of what he was sure they were about to see? How was he going to tell her that their friends were dead? "Cordy," he started as he tightened his arm around her waist. "I want you to slowly look around and tell me what you see."

"Angel, you're scaring me," she stated, her eyes wide.

"Just...Just look around, okay?"

She squinted her eyes as she continued to frown at him. The flickering torches cast bouncing shadows across the circle so it was difficult for her to make out anything at first. Then she saw Giles, in a heap on the ground. "Giles!" She screamed as she wrenched free from Angel's grasp and ran towards him.

Angel followed her towards Giles' body and watched as she slowly knelt down next to the stilled form. He already knew the answer to what she was trying to find out. The man that had been their leader, their rock for so many years, was dead.

"Oh my god, Giles." She looked up at Angel, tears in her eyes. "Is he...?"

Angel simply nodded and turned his head away, not wanting to see the pained expression on her face. He had promised himself that as long as he and Cordelia were together, he would never cause her pain nor allow anyone or anything else to either. It probably had been a foolish thing to vow, especially in their line of work, but he always thought he'd be able to stick by it, give her a normal relationship. He'd been wrong, so very wrong, on so many levels in the past few days.

Quietly she cried as she placed Giles' hands across his chest and stroked his face. Of all the things she had missed when she had left Sunnydale, she had missed Giles the most. He had always been the strong one, the in control one. She admired that in him. Now she regretted the fact that she had never told him how lucky she had felt to have him shape her teenage years. Had it not been for Giles taking a fatherly role in her life, though his advice was rarely listened to, she would never have known what existed in the world she lived in, and would have ignored the things going on around her. Had she done that, she would never have been "fighting the good fight" with Angel and the AI gang. She would never have found her place in life. As she stroked his face one last time, she remembered that Wesley had been paired with Giles. "Wesley?" She asked at first in a whisper while looking around wildly. "Wesley?"

"Cordy..." Angel stated as he placed a hand on her shoulder, but was interrupted by the sound of a groan coming from Wesley's direction.

"Wesley!" She yelled as she jumped up and ran towards him, hoping that she and Angel weren't too late to save him. When she reached Wesley's side, her eyes widened as she dropped to her knees beside him, blood pouring from his neck.

Slowly, he opened his eyes. Such a simple thing, yet it was an incredibly difficult task. He tried to whisper her name but could only gag instead.

"Shhhhhh," she said comfortingly, taking his hand in hers and trying to stop the blood flowing from his throat. "It's all going to be okay. We'll get you out of here."

He mouthed the word 'no' as he closed his eyes again, the cold spreading across his torso and limbs. Feeling her hand wrap around his, he squeezed as he heard her tell him that she was sorry about everything. Then he heard another voice, Angel's voice, coming from far away, sounding hollow and tinny. He couldn't quite make out what was being said since the cold and quiet was taking over. He felt as if he were floating.

***

"Wesley? Wesley can you hear me?" Angel demanded as he leaned over the former watcher that had been one of his closest friends, but that had been before...the kidnapping and lies.

He wasn't sure how he had missed the sound of Wes's heartbeat when they arrived. Perhaps because it had been so weak and barely audible, but now that he was closer, he knew for sure that the man's heart was no longer beating. He rocked back on his heels and buried his face in his hands. To his left, he heard Cordelia's sobs as she began to comprehend what had just happened. They sounded desperate and pained. He would have reached out to her to share in her suffering, but he was too wrapped up in his own grief at the moment to really care about anyone but himself. There were things he should have said to Wes, like telling him that he probably would have done the same thing in his place if he had been the one translating the false prophecy. Instead, he had been needlessly stubborn.

Cordelia gently caressed Wes's face while she tried, unsuccessfully, to choke back the sobs. The pain she felt inside was more than she could bear so she lashed out at the one thing that was closest and most available...Angel. Without thinking, reacting on raw emotions, she pushed the crouching vampire off his feet and onto his back. Before she knew it, she was on top of him, beating him with her fists and sobbing uncontrollably.

***

Suddenly, and without warning, Angel found himself flat on his back. His guilt plagued thoughts forgotten as Cordelia swept down on him, fear and anger covering her face, tears running freely. "What the...?"

"Your fault!" She yelled at him as she pounded on his chest. Her thoughts were barely coherent and her voice hoarse in her throat.

Angel lay on the ground, hardly flinching as Cordelia took out her grief on him, but it was her words that shocked and hurt him. "Cordy, how is this my fault?" He demanded, grabbing her wrists to still her flailing arms.

"You let him die!"

"There was nothing I could have done!"

"You could have saved him!"

"Cordy, you're not making any sense..."

"You could have at least told him you were sorry, that maybe you forgave him. You let him die thinking that you hated him." Everything came out in a rush, running together. Her breathing was fast and irregular. "You could have saved him," she cried one last time as she fell, exhausted, onto his chest.

He pulled her closer, letting her sobs continue to wrack her body. He wanted to tell her that he already felt guilty, probably guilty enough for both of them but before he could speak any words of comfort, he became immediately aware of a presence behind them.

***

"Well now, what's this all about?" A voice thick with an Irish accent asked. "I've never seen such a sorrier sight before in me life."

Cordelia snapped her head up as she recognized the voice. "Doyle?" Her tear-filled eyes widened at the sight of their former co-worker and friend. "Is that really you?"

The dark haired man smiled brightly at her. "Were you expecting someone else?"

She scrambled off Angel and threw herself into Doyle's arms. "You have no idea how happy I am to see you."

"I can take a guess or two."

Angel stood up and absently brushed himself off. With a careful eye, he studied the scene before him. Something felt off; wrong. "Cordelia, maybe you should step away from him."

"Are you delusional?" She demanded with a glare.

"It's just...we don't know if it's really him." He gave her a pleading look, hoping that it would help her to understand what he was saying. This was supposed to be the time of their trial, so why would a friendly face just appear out of nowhere?

She shot him another glare and then turned her attention back to Doyle. He felt real, and he definitely smelled like Doyle used to; it had to be him. Giving him a brilliant smile, she apologized for Angel's behavior. "You'll have to excuse our friend, he's a bit cranky. End of the world stuff. You know how he can get..."

Doyle laughed as he hugged Cordelia tighter to him. "I know what you mean, darling."

Suddenly, her demeanor changed from happy to see him to extremely angry. She stepped away from him and put her one hand on her hip while using the other to point a finger at him. "Hey mister!" She growled, waving the finger in front of his face. "I never got to yell at you for sacrificing your life! Trying to be all heroic. I should have killed you myself! Oh, and while I'm at it...I'm pretty pissed off about you giving me those damn visions too. Not that I don't appreciate what you did and all, but you could have at least warned me!"

Her face was now mere inches from his and it took all the restraint he could muster to keep from leaning into her and kissing her. He closed his eyes and conjured up the memory of her lips and how they had felt when he kissed her goodbye that day. Petal softness. The sound of Angel clearing his throat brought him back from that memory with a jolt. He had to stick with the plan. Kissing Cordelia, as much as he would love to, was not what the Powers had sent him here to do.

"Wanna tell us why you're here?" Angel asked, his face serious as he took a couple of strides towards his girlfriend and the once dead half demon. "I'm sure you're not here to flirt with Cordy."

"Angel!" Cordelia yelled. "Stop it. This isn't how we treat old friends, especially ones that are all glowly and...Oh my god!"

"Sorry," Doyle stated as he began glowing in an otherworldly light. "Don't mean to frighten you...It's just they're trying to hurry me along."

"Who's trying to hurry you along?" Cordelia asked, suspecting that she already knew the answer.

"The Powers. They're a mite bit cranky with me at the moment."

Angel stood next to Cordelia and placed his arm around her, an action that he knew wouldn't go unnoticed by Doyle.

She felt Angel's arm encircle her waist as she tilted her head and frowned. "Why?"

"Well for starters, I was just supposed to deliver a message, not get to chatting and all. Places to be, people to serve." Pausing for a moment, he took notice of Angel and Cordelia's closeness. The Powers had told him of their love but even with being prepared, seeing it for himself was a shock, not to mention disheartening. He took a breath and continued. "You think it would have all ended with my death, but no. I had to be all noble; so the Powers rewarded me by making me a messenger in the afterlife. No rest for the weary."

Cordelia was entranced by his bright glow. "You look just like me when I do that..."

"I know," he stated with a small, sad smile. "You're a part of me."

"I am? How?"

"Well, how do you think you can handle all those visions now without much pain?"

"They made me part demon, so I could keep them..."

"Yeah. I guess Skip didn't tell you who gave them that idea now did he?"

"You?"

"You can thank me later. Right now I have a few things to tell you."

"Yeah, you said that before," Angel deadpanned.

"Oh stop getting your panties in a twist, oh broody one. I'm not here to take your girlfriend away from you. Relax."

As Angel began his retort, all of his senses went into overload. He spun around just in time to see a figure coming at them.

***

Before Angel could reach her, the figure had buried an axe into her back. She felt the cold steel hit bone; the pain was sharp and blinding. Slowly, she sunk to the ground, her mouth trying to form words while a look of surprise covered her face. "Angel?" She managed to ask in a hushed whisper before she fell onto her face.

Doyle was at her side in a flash. The Powers seemed to have left out this little detail when they sent him forth with his instructions. Now he knew what she must have felt when she watched him die.

"Now you know what it's like to lose someone you love. For good," the figure growled to Angel, anger coating every word.

Doyle checked for a pulse but knew that she must be gone since he couldn't feel her presence any longer. Slowly, he looked up and met Angel's pleading gaze. Shaking his head, he watched as an expression of pain and horror covered the souled vampire's face. Quickly he stood and made his way over to Angel, knowing what was going to happen if he didn't get there fast enough.

"Holtz," Angel screamed, trying to break free from Doyle's grasp as he morphed into game face. "You son of a bitch!"

Holtz laughed at him. "Did you think that death would keep me from avenging my family?"

"Doyle, let go of me," Angel demanded, glaring at his old friend and trying desperately to shake free.

"No," he stated in a steady tone. "Not before I tell you why I'm here."

"Angelus," Holtz yelled, apparently unaware of the Messenger. "Are you listening to me?"

Angel looked at the vampire hunter and then back to his friend, confusion beginning to tug at the edges of his mind.

Doyle leveled his gaze at Angel, his manner and tone turning serious. "You must remember, not everything is as it seems. You have to continue to fight the good fight, do you understand me?"

"Doyle if you don't let go of me now..."

"Angelus? Have you lost your mind?" Holtz asked as he took several steps closer to the vampire.

"What? You'll kill me?" Doyle laughed. "Come on now, I'm already dead. Can't kill the dead. But the dead can kill you. Fight the good fight, Angel."

Angel felt the piercing stare of Doyle's eyes but he was so caught up in his rage towards Holtz that he didn't grasp the full meaning of the message. "Let go of me," he demanded, each word punctuated precisely as his yellow eyes darted wildly towards Holtz.

"Fine, man. But don't ever say I didn't tell you so. Go on. Go kill him. I'm not standing in your way," he stated as he dropped Angel's arm.

Holtz laughed heartily as he watched the exchange between Angel and the air. "My killing your girlfriend has thrown you over the edge, hasn't it?"

"I'm going to kill you for what you've done," Angel spat back at him.

"Alright," Doyle sighed. "I'm out of here. I'm not gonna stick around to watch you destroy yourself. I've delivered my message, do with it what you will." He solemnly looked at Angel and then went over to Cordelia's body. After carefully taking the axe out of her back, he picked her up and the two of them disappeared.

***

Both Holtz and Angel stared at the space where Cordelia once laid, stunned that her body seemed to have vanished into the nether realms. As if the world was now moving in slow motion, Angel turned his eyes upon Holtz, a growl emanating deep from within. His anger no longer boiled under the surface but erupted in a blazing inferno, bringing the beast to the fore. "You want to deal with Angelus? I'm going to give you Angelus," he growled to Holtz. "You're going to be the sorriest son of a bitch that ever lived."

"What could you possibly do to me that you haven't already done, Angelus? You've already killed my wife, my children. There's nothing left."

Angel's blood coursed through his veins, unrelenting, screaming for him to kill the man before him. "There's you. After what you did to Cordelia and Connor did you just think...?"

"Ah, yes. How is my son?"

"He's not your son, Holtz. He's mine," he roared in anger as he balled his hands into fists and struck his thighs with them.

"He'll never be yours," Holtz stated simply, with a sly smile on his face.

In an instant Angel was in front of the former vampire hunter, a hand on each of the man's arms, his fingers digging into the soft flesh. "Don't be so sure of yourself," he spat at him. "You failed. He's my son in every way possible now. Thanks to...to Wesley." His expression softened as the demon began to retreat when he thought of how Wes had revealed everything to Connor.

"That's not possible. Justine and I..."

"Justine and you messed up, obviously. I didn't go to the bottom of the ocean and my son believes in me."

"You lie."

"Angelus might do that...but I don't. And speaking of Angelus, he's just itching to come back out and play so just say something to provoke me." He struggled to keep the demon on the leash but was having a hard time doing so; it wanted blood.

"I killed your girlfriend and now I'm going to kill you. How's that? Does that work for you?"

Angel tilted his head to the side, as if he were having a conversation with his beast and listening what it had to say. "Yeah. I'd say that pretty much works," he snarled as he sank his fangs into side of Holtz's neck. But when he started to feed, a blinding flash of light appeared in his mind's eye and a voice rattled his brain. Fight the good fight, Angel.

His slipped back into his human visage and released his grasp on Holtz. The man dropped to his knees stunned.

"Finish it, Angelus!" He roared. "Finish it now!"

"I won't," a stunned Angel stated as he shook his head, eyes wide with the realization of what he had started to do.

"You must. It's kill or be killed, Angelus. Which do you want it to be?" He asked from his knees.

"I will not kill you and I am Angel, not Angelus. I am not a monster."

Holtz rose to his feet. Reaching into his pocket, he produced a wooden stake. "I will kill you, you know."

"I will not kill you," Angel repeated.

"Fine then. I've been waiting to do this for centuries!" He yelled as he rushed towards Angel, burying the stake in his chest.

Angel looked down and then looked back up. This was it. "Connor," he managed to whisper to the wind before he fell to the ground, nothing more than a pile of dust.

 

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