New BeginningsBy PSUBrat
Starting Anew
Buffy woke to the high pitch ringing of her alarm clock. She looked at the time. It was seven thirty in the morning. "Too early for super heroes," she said aloud to her room. She turned off her alarm and put the pillow over her head hoping to catch a few more minutes of sleep. Unfortunately, sleep wasn't coming. She had too many thoughts going through her head. After watching Warren die, she had been plagued by nightmares - of the non-slayer type - and a lot of "what ifs." What if she had made it to Xander in time? What if she hadn't been careless and gone after Warren before Willow and Giles had finished draining his powers? What if she hadn't hesitated before trying to save Warren?
"What if? What if? What if?" Buffy asked sighing, "Does it really matter anymore?" She pulled the pillow tighter around her head and tried to ignore the nagging sensation at the back of her mind. Things were finally supposed to be better, right?
"Buffy?" a small voice asked from the doorway.
Lifting the pillow from her head, Buffy stared at Dawn blankly. "Yeah," she asked.
"It's time to get up," Dawn stated as she folded her arms across her chest, "Visiting hours begin at eight and I want to be there if Xander wakes up."
Buffy sat up and ran her fingers through her blonde hair. "Can Tara take you?" she asked.
"Tara stayed at the hospital again last night. Willow's supposed to come home tomorrow though. Not that we really have a home at the moment," the young girl lamented.
They had been living in Xander's apartment since their escape from Warren. He had pretty much trashed the Summers' home. Buffy and the others couldn't move back into the house until it was basically rebuilt, and on the pitiful excuse for a salary she got from Doublemeat Palace, that was going to take a long time. "Okay. Give me a few minutes. Why don't you get something to eat while I get ready?"
She watched Dawn leave the room and heard her go into the kitchen. She laid her head back down on her pillow and grabbed Mr. Gordo. Looking at the stuffed pig she asked, "So, do you know where he is?"
Mr. Gordo silently looked back at his owner. Buffy sighed and pulled herself out of bed. She tossed the stuffed animal on the sheets and went to the closet looking for something to wear. She chose a simple sundress and pulled her hair back into a small ponytail. Dawn was right; they should be at the hospital in case Xander woke up; but they had been doing this ritual for three weeks now, and nothing new had happened. The doctors said that despite the internal injuries and loss of blood, Xander should have a full recovery once he came out of the coma. It would just take time. A lot of time.
Anya had never once left Xander's side. She pretty much ate and slept at the hospital, if she ate and slept at all. Buffy wasn't sure. She was moved by the demon's devotion; it made her wish that someone loved her that much. She looked in the mirror and thought about Spike. Had he loved her that much? It didn't really matter now, did it? He was gone. She missed him, despite the bathroom incident. There was no one there to drive her crazy like he did.
"Stop it," she chided herself still looking in the mirror, "He's evil. He hurt you and you don't belong together."
As she was finishing her makeup, the phone rang. "I'll get it," she shouted so that Dawn could hear her. It was Giles. They made small talk for a few minutes as she caught him up on Xander and Willow's conditions. She could sense that he wanted to tell her something so she paused long enough to give him the chance.
"Buffy, I'll be coming back to Sunnydale early next month. There are a few things that we need to discuss."
She didn't know why but her heart sank as she heard these words. "Is everything okay Giles?" She asked hesitantly.
"Quite. I just wanted to discuss Dawn and her growing powers. Do you remember the prophecies that I told you about, the ones that the Council found? Well it turns out that these new prophecies could pertain to Dawn. We've been working day and night to translate them. I wanted to share the translations with you in person."
"What kind of prophecies, Giles? Is it bad?"
"No, no. Nothing bad. I also have a few other things I wish to speak to you about as well."
A feeling of dread lay in the pit of her stomach. Giles would only come to Sunnydale to talk to her if something was seriously wrong. "Are you sure nothing is wrong, Giles?"
"Buffy, everything is fine. I will see you in a few weeks. Please do wish Willow and Xander my best."
They said their goodbyes and hung up. Giles was lying to her. Something was wrong. Buffy was convinced her day was going to get much worse before it got better.
***
Willow was slowly moving around her hospital room trying to get the feel for walking again. Anytime she wanted to go somewhere, they had made her use a wheel chair. She hated those things. She felt so helpless in them. The pain in her back from the stabbing had subsided some but it still hurt to walk. Like right now; but she needed to feel human again. Rounding the corner of the bed, she moved too quickly and winced in pain.
"Sweetie, you have to take it easy," Tara said admonishingly as she ran over to help Willow. "Stop trying to over do it."
"I can't help it," Willow gasped, "I just can't sit in that bed a minute longer."
Tara gave Willow an understanding look. She knew she certainly couldn't handle being confined to a bed inside of a small room for weeks either. "Will, please at least sit down in the chair. If you pull your stitches they aren't going to send you home tomorrow."
Willow sighed and lowered herself into the visitor's chair in her room. She certainly didn't want to jeopardize her release from this place. The thought of going home brought a smile to her face.
Tara took a seat on the bed across from her. She didn't want to have the conversation she was about to start with Willow but she knew it had to be done. Willow's injury had been severe and Tara hadn't been sure if her lover was going to pull through, so her suspicions about the black majicks had waited. Now, Willow was strong enough to go home so she was strong enough to answer Tara's questions.
"W-Willow," Tara stuttered. God, she didn't want to have this conversation. "I was wondering…"
Willow looked over at Tara with a questioning expression on her face. Tara melted. "I love her so much," Tara thought to herself and smiled.
As Tara was about to continue with the conversation, Willow smiled brightly and said excitedly, "Dawnie!"
"Heya Willow," Dawn said enthusiastically bouncing into the room and heading for a seat on the bed next to Tara, "So the doctors are going to spring you from here tomorrow, huh?"
"Yep. I get to go home and be with everyone," Willow said happily giving Tara a quick glance and squeezing her hand. She couldn't wait to go home. It would be almost like starting over…again. These last three weeks she had concentrated on getting better and hadn't even thought about her wish. The guilt that she had been dealing with prior to being kidnapped by Amy and Warren returned. She tried to push it out of her mind and concentrate on the moment at hand.
Tara smiled at Dawn and asked, "Is Buffy here with you?"
Dawn looked down at her feet and whispered, "Yeah, she's down checking on Xander. I wanted to stop up here first."
Willow and Tara looked at each other. They had been so happy about Willow being able to go home that they had almost forgotten that Xander was still in a coma.
"Dawnie, why don't you stay here with Willow," Tara said with a smile, "I'm gonna go downstairs and check in on Xander." She gave Willow's hand a squeeze, got up off the bed and walked out of the room.
"Hey Dawnie," Willow asked hoping to take Dawn's mind off of Xander, "wanna see my scar?"
Dawn's face brightened and she giggled nervously. "Seriously?" She asked.
"Serious," Willow said nodding her head. Standing up slowly, she motioned for Dawn to come over. She turned her back to the girl and lifted up her pajama top.
"Whoa," Dawn gasped, "Does it hurt?"
"Not so much. It's better than it was and the doctors say that it shouldn't scar too badly when it's totally done healing."
Dawn stopped herself as she reached out to touch the jagged wound that was held together by stitches. Hesitantly she asked, "Can I touch it?"
"Sure Dawnie," Willow said, hoping it would ease Dawn's fears.
Dawn slowly traced the wound with her finger; the stitches felt funny, kind of like fishing line. She ran her finger over the wound a second time. Suddenly it disappeared. Stunned, she stammered, "Uhhm…Willow? What just happened?"
Willow had felt a tingling sensation and warmth cover her scab. She tried to turn to see what had happened. She expected the movement to bring on a great deal of pain but instead she was able to twist around to see in the mirror. Her stab wound was gone! She looked over at Dawn in shock.
***
Buffy had been sitting in the small hospital room for about twenty minutes now. She glanced over at the machines that were hooked up to Xander. There were tubes and wires everywhere. They monitored his heart and breathing. Everything seemed to be okay. Except for the fact that he wouldn't wake up. She hated coming here. There was nothing that she could do to help her friend and she was starting to give up hope that he would ever return from the coma. Buffy looked over at Anya who was sleeping uncomfortably in the chair next to Xander's bed. The dark circles under the demon's eyes told Buffy how much sleep, or little in this case, Anya was getting.
Tara walked into the room and over to where Buffy was sitting. "Any change?" She asked hopefully.
"No. Everything is the same as the day before," Buffy said sadly, "The doctors say his wounds are getting better, and that the coma is just the body's way of shutting him down so he can heal, but I dunno; I don't think they're telling us everything."
Tara put her arm around Buffy and gently hugged her in a reassuring manner. "Things will be okay, Buffy. He'll be okay. Willow is."
Buffy looked at Tara's smile and returned one of her own. Tara seemed to be the optimist through all of this. There were too many things on Buffy's mind for her to even concentrate on the good for more than a minute at a time. Yeah, things had gotten better with Dawn and she was grateful that they were communicating again, but she felt like she was still missing a piece of herself.
Anya stirred in her chair. Her eyes fluttered open and she saw Tara and Buffy watching over Xander. She got out of the chair and stretched her arms and legs. What she wouldn't give to sleep in a soft, comfortable bed for ten minutes. She couldn't understand why there wasn't a bed in here for her; after all, they had given Xander a private room. If they were going to do that they could at least bring a cot in here for her to sleep on. She walked over to Xander, put his hand in hers and stroked his face.
"Good morning Xander. It's me, Anya. I'm here. Still. Buffy and Tara are here too." She smiled at the other two girls who were standing on the other side of the bed now. The doctors had told her that Xander could hear her even though he was in a coma. They told her that it would be good for him if she would talk to him, reassure him that he was going to be okay. She wasn't sure that she believed in this stuff but she was going to try it anyway. She would do just about anything to bring Xander back to her.
Tara shifted uncomfortably on her feet and Buffy looked around the room while Anya stroked Xander's face and hair. They felt like they were intruding as Anya whispered words of encouragement in their friend's ear and kissed his lips softly.
Sensing that Buffy was just as uncomfortable as she was, Tara suggested, "Buffy, maybe we should go get some coffee and some breakfast for Anya."
"That sounds like a great idea," Buffy said, jumping at the chance to leave the room. "Anya," Buffy continued, "Is there anything you really want? A jelly doughnut or something?"
Anya continued talking to Xander and didn't hear any of the conversation. She was lost in her own thoughts. She didn't even notice Buffy and Tara walk out of the room. She was too busy trying to will Xander to open his eyes. Why did he have to be so stubborn? Why couldn't he just wake up? Didn't he know how hard this was on her? Didn't he know that being away from the money this long made her go crazy as well? She didn't know what she would have done if Halfrek hadn't agreed to watch the Magic Box while she tended to Xander. Hali hadn't exactly been happy about it but she knew that Anya needed to be near her human.
The tears started coming again, as they did everyday. A tear dropped onto Xander's face and she kissed it off his cheek. As she continued to stroke his face, Dawn and a flushed Willow burst into the room.
***
Buffy and Tara had taken their time at the cafeteria. Neither girl wanted to return to the hospital room but both knew they owed it to their friends to be there. Even if nothing happened. They slowly made their way to the cashier and paid for their items. As they meandered the hallway toward the elevators, Buffy noticed that Tara was quieter than usual.
"Is everything okay Tara?" Buffy asked her friend.
Tara smiled sadly at Buffy. She wasn't sure what to say. How do you tell someone that you think they're not living in the right world? That none of them were? Do you just come out and say it? Taking a deep breath she was about to tell Buffy her suspicions when the elevator door opened to reveal a crowded car. This certainly wasn't the time to open up about her thoughts, especially in front of those that wouldn't understand.
Buffy and Tara stepped into the elevator and pushed the button for floor three. The ride was silent. When the car stopped at their floor, Buffy dreaded taking the next few steps to the room and hated herself for feeling that way. As they rounded the corner, she heard a commotion coming from Xander's room. Her and Tara exchanged a quick, worried glance and picked up the pace.
When they got inside of the room neither of them could believe what they were seeing. Not only was Xander awake and talking but he was trying to sit up in bed as well! He still looked a little pale but other than that you'd never know that he was a man that was sitting on death's doorstep just days before.
"Xander," Buffy asked incredulously.
"Hey Buff. Long time no see," he said with a wide smile.
How and when were the only other two words Buffy was able to get out of her mouth. She was so stunned. Dawn giggled while Willow laughed and Anya cried. The first thought to cross Tara's mind was that Willow had used magic to perform this miracle.
"Look," Willow exclaimed as she pulled up her shirt to reveal her back, "no more ouchie!"
"Willow," Tara asked with concern in her voice, "did you use magic to do this?"
Willow shook her head and pointed at Dawn. "Dawnie did it. We're not sure how, but she did."
Buffy walked over to her sister and looked at her. "Since when did you become a healer?"
Dawn shrugged her shoulders and laughed, "I'm not sure, but isn't it cool?"
Anya stopped crying long enough to hug the teenage girl. She was so happy that Xander was awake. After the others left, she would make sure that he knew exactly how much pain this had caused her; but for right now, she was elated that he was with her again.
"Isn't this wonderful," Anya declared beaming, "It's like a whole new beginning!"