Wonder Woman
They'd looked in all the kitchen cupboards and drawers, and Xander and Andrew still hadn't found a single candle. In the mean time, they'd finished their first beer, and started in on a second bottle each. Andrew was almost enjoying the bitterness of the amber liquid, and was feeling decidedly grown-up. Xander had found another flashlight and left Andrew to continue the search in the kitchen, while he went to look through the rest of the house.Taking another swig of his drink, Andrew sighed and looked around the kitchen sullenly. He pulled open a cupboard that he'd opened ten times already, and inspected it again. <Nothing,> he observed, <unless...> Andrew took another drink, finishing his beer, and set the empty bottle on the counter with the others. Then, holding the flashlight in his teeth, Andrew crawled up onto the counter in order to look on the top shelf. To his delight, pushed to the back on the top shelf was a shoe box with 'Anya' written on its side. <Girls like candles,> Andrew thought happily, taking the box and sitting down cross-legged on the counter, <maybe Anya-,> Andrew lost his train of thought as he pulled the lid off of the box. There *was* a large candle inside... along with some other items that sparked Andrew's curiosity. He sat the box on the counter beside him and began taking things out for closer inspection. First there was the candle, which Andrew set down on the counter. Then there was a pack of matches, which Andrew used to light the candle. There was a string of multicolored condoms, several tubes of lubricant, a small key, and a set of handcuffs. He took the handcuffs and turned them around in his hands appreciatively (they were shiny). Andrew tried the little key and found that it belonged to the handcuffs, which he then snapped onto his right wrist experimentally. "Ouch," he said out loud, "That-,"
"Hey, you found a candle," Xander cut in, having just returned to the kitchen.
Andrew whipped his handcuffed wrist behind his back and cleared his throat, "Uh... yes?" he said.
Xander raised his eyebrows and looked at Andrew calculatingly, "...What?" he demanded.
"It was... uh, in a box of Anya's things..." Andrew said, carefully avoiding Xander's stare.
Xander crossed the kitchen to the counter where Andrew was seated, "Oh?" he asked, picking up the shoe box and looking inside. "Oh," he said again and looked back at Andrew, "She must have left this stuff here when she moved out..." Xander looked back into the shoe box, mentally taking stock of the familiar items inside, "Uh... was there a set of... handcuffs in there?" he asked hesitantly.
Andrew sighed and brought his right hand out from behind his back, holding it up for Xander to see. Xander quirked and eyebrow. Andrew pouted, "I was just trying them out..." he pleaded.
Xander chuckled, "That's okay," he said, "it's been a while since they got any attention anyway." Xander placed his (also empty) bottle of beer on the counter beside Andrews, and fetched two new ones out of the fridge. He opened them both, and offered one to Andrew, who took a sip and set the bottle down on the counter.
Andrew fiddled with the handcuffs around his wrist, "If you can believe it," he said, "For a while when I was growing up I actually wanted to be a cop."
Xander chuckled and then offered Andrew his left wrist, "Go ahead officer Wells," he said, "No harm in trying them on, as long as we've got the key."
Andrew poked the key on the counter, and looked back at Xander excitedly. He took the other side of the handcuffs in his already cuffed hand, and snapped it down around Xander's left wrist. Andrew giggled, "You have the right to remain silent," he teased.
Xander raised his eyebrows and smiled inwardly, conjuring an interesting mental picture of Andrew in a police officer's uniform. He shook his head, <Remember what I said about compromising positions?> Xander asked himself silently. <That they're the best ones?> he answered himself. <No,> Xander corrected mentally, <that you're not supposed to be thinking about *him* in them?>. Xander sighed to himself resignedly, "So what made you change your mind?" he asked. Andrew's eyes ran distractedly up Xander's arm, over his shoulder, to his neck- "Andrew?" Xander asked again, noting Andrew's obvious distraction and wondering if maybe he wasn't the only one thinking about compromising situations."Huh?" Andrew said, forcing his eyes back to meet Xander's.
"What made you change your mind?" Xander repeated, "About being a cop?"
"Oh," Andrew shrugged, "I started reading 'Wonder Woman' comics."
Xander frowned confusedly, "So... that's when you wanted to become a super-villain?" he asked.
Andrew wrinkled his nose, "*No*, then I wanted to be *Wonder Woman*." He cocked his head to the side and smiled nostalgically, "I had the costume and everything..."
Xander thought for a moment, trying to picture Andrew dressed as Wonder Woman. Xander was pleased that the image did very little for him... <Although,> he thought, <The blue hot pants are sort of-,> Xander frowned at himself, <Stop that.> "Wonder Woman, huh?" he asked, and Andrew nodded ruefully. Xander chuckled, "So what was your next career choice?" he asked, "Star ship captain? Jedi knight?"
"Who says there was a *next* choice?" Andrew asked teasingly.
"So this whole sweet and mild mannered thing is just a ruse?" Xander asked, playing along, "And when no one's looking you get into your hot pants and halter top, and go off fighting evil."
Andrew nodded somberly, "Don't forget the gold boots and head band," he insisted. Both men laughed earnestly, and at length, their handcuffed hands forgotten and lying once again on Andrew's thigh. Andrew sighed contentedly and cocked his head to the side, "What did you want to be when you were little?" he asked.
"Me?" Xander asked. Andrew nodded insistently. "I don't know, I didn't really start thinking about it until high school," Xander admitted. "I wanted to be a watcher for a while..." he trailed off, and shrugged, "I was a bartender for a bit, that was sort of fun."
"You were a bar tender?" Andrew asked reverently, "Can you do the whole fancy bottle-tossing thing like Tom Cruise in Cocktail?"
"Oh, sure," Xander flung his arms in the air to demonstrate, forgetting that he was still handcuffed to the other man. Andrew lost his balance and tipped off of the counter into Xander's arms. As he slid off the counter there was a soft metallic tinkle as the little key was swept into the sink. For a moment the two men were motionless in each other's arms, their faces mere inches apart in the candlelight. Xander cleared his throat, and set Andrew back on the counter. "Maybe we should take these off," he suggested, nodding to the handcuffs and adding, "I think the key fell into the sink."
Xander grabbed the candle, and held it over the sink while Andrew bent over and reached for the key with his left hand. There was another metallic clink. "Uh-oh," Andrew said.
"*Uh-oh*?" Xander asked, "Why *uh-oh*?"
Andrew straightened, and looked at Xander, "The key kinda... fell... down the drain," he cringed.
Xander eye's went wide, "It what?" he demanded.
"It *fell down the drain*," Andrew repeated wretchedly.
Xander gaped at him, "...How?" he demanded.
Andrew attempted to cross his arms over his chest but couldn't, as one was still attached to Xander. He settled for putting his free hand on his hip. "I'm no good with my left hand," he pleaded, "I didn't *mean* to lose it..." Xander groaned and smacked his left hand down on the counter, bringing Andrew's right hand with it. "Ow," Andrew said quietly.
"Sorry," Xander offered. "I'm not mad at *you*," he insisted, "I'm just mad that we lost the key."
"Maybe if we-," Andrew was cut off at that point, as the candle flickered out and they were plunged back into darkness. Xander groaned again and threw his hands in the air angrily, unintentionally pulling Andrew back into his arms. Andrew laughed nervously, but didn't move away. Emboldened by the cover of darkness, Xander held Andrew close while he leaned around and re-light the candle. Pulling back again, Xander gazed at Andrew in the renewed candle light. Andrew pouted, "Are you *sure* you're not mad at me?" he asked.
"Positive," Xander assured him, "It wasn't your fault." Xander looked at the man in his arms and laughed to himself, <Well Xan,> he thought, <Fate keeps throwing you compromising situations... you might as well just go with it.> He took a deep breath, cocked his head slightly to the side and leaned a little closer. Andrew looked at Xander uncertainly for a moment, then bit his lip and inched forward closing what little gap there was between their two bodies. Xander ran his unattached hand lightly up Andrew's arm to his neck. Andrew inhaled sharply at the other man's tentative touch, a thing he'd only felt before in his dreams and fantasies. Xander leaned in to-
"Xander?" Andrew whispered. Xander leaned back, dropped his hand to his side, and raised his eyebrows inquisitively. Andrew squirmed, "I have to pee," he said apologetically.
Xander laughed, relieved, "Okay, Wonder Woman," he teased, "Go pee. I'll be waiting for you."
Andrew wrinkled his nose and lifted his right hand which, obviously, was still handcuffed to Xander's left. Xander groaned, "I forgot..." He shrugged, "Doesn't matter," he offered, "I'll come with you and-," he covered his eyes with his free hand, "-cover my eyes." Andrew squirmed again. "...What?" Xander asked.
Andrew sighed despondently, "I'm right handed," he whined.
"So use you're left," Xander said flatly, "It won't kill you."
"I can't," Andrew whined, "I can't use my left hand for *anything*." He nodded back to the sink insistently, "Remember what happened with the key?"
"Well what do you want *me* to do about it?" Xander asked incredulously. Andrew raised his eyebrows. Xander shook his head resolutely, "No," he said firmly, "No way. If you can't be ambidextrous for a day you can pee sitting down." He fixed Andrew with the most commanding look he could muster under the circumstance.
Andrew sighed and rolled his eyes in defeat, "Fine," he said sulkily.
Xander smiled inwardly, <See, Xan,> he thought, <not *all* the compromising situations are good ones...> He ushered Andrew towards the bathroom, "You know Wonder Woman sat down to pee," he ventured.
Andrew frowned, "Too bad I didn't bring my hot pants with me," he said dryly.
Xander chuckled, <Yeah,> he thought before he could stop himself, <Too bad...>