Chapter 9 - Flirting


The next few days passed uneventfully. Buffy paid another visit to Wesley
and filled him in on the details he was wondering about. Buffy and Spike
patrolled at night, competing against each other to see who could stake the
most vamps. Buffy got to know Fred and Gunn a little bit better and was
delighted in how much Spike’s friends resembled the Scoobies. Gunn was
nothing like Xander, but he was fun to be around. Fred had a more quiet
demeanor and was remarkably like Willow when it came to studying.

Tonight, Buffy and Spike were patrolling, except it was more like they were
walking through the streets of Sunnydale and talking. Their friendly
staking competition was abandoned for the night as Buffy told him all about
her friends and Giles. Spike almost had tears running down his face at
Buffy’s description of the Wesley she had known.

“You mean to tell me that my Watcher was a ponce?” Spike asked between
laughs.

Buffy smiled. “If ponce means frightened, nervous, anxious guy, then yeah,
that was him.”

Spike tried to imagine the resilient man who had trained him as someone who
timidly hesitated to get into a fight. The Wesley he knew did not match up
to the clean shaven, perfectly-attired young man that Buffy had known.

“He wasn’t all bad,” Buffy continued. “I realized that much when he came
back and wanted to fight the Mayor with the rest of us. He could have gone
running back to England with his tail between his legs, but he stayed. He
knew what was right. I never told him, but that got my respect. I always
did feel kind of bad for thinking I got him fired. Of course, that wasn’t
enough to make me return to the Council.”

“Yeah, they definitely don’t like an opinionated Slayer.”

“You know Travers?”

“Met him a couple of times. He retired last year, and now it’s some new guy
named Nigel Grant.”

“Nigel? That name sounds familiar. Oh well, it’s about time Travers
retired. He’s pushing seventy. He was way too focused on the way the Council
used to work and didn’t pay enough attention to what was going on around
him.”

“Yeah, I gathered that much from the few conversations we had. It was
pretty much, ‘Be a good boy and do as you’re told’.”

“That sounds about right.”

The pair walked in silence for a few more minutes, coming to a stop in front
of the swing set in the park. Buffy turned around and sat down on one of
the swings as she looked up at Spike. “So what about you? Had any
apocalypses I should know about?”

“Just one. I don’t know if it’s up to apocalypse standards like you’re used
to. Just a bunch of vamps and demons using some magic to open up the
Hellmouth.”

“That’s never any fun,” Buffy said with a grimace on her face.

“They were easy enough to stop. Definitely no stories like the ones you
have. You’re pretty much a legend as far as Slayers go.”

Buffy laughed as she pushed off the ground to send her swing flying into the
air. Pumping her legs to get her higher, Buffy shook her head. “A legend,
huh? So that explains why you never heard of me.”

“I’d heard of you, pet,” Spike said, coming around to push her from behind.
“I just didn’t pay attention to details.”

“Sounds familiar,” Buffy said, thinking of all the lectures Giles gave her.
The two relaxed as Spike pushed Buffy at a relaxed pace. Coming to a stop a
few minutes later, Spike looked at his watch.

“I hate to cut out early, luv. I made a promise to see someone tonight.”

“Translation-your girlfriend is mad at you for spending so much time with
another woman and wants you to come over for some quality time.”

“That about sums it up, Slayer.”

“No big. I’ll make another pass, and then I’m on my way home.”

“Buffy, I don’t like you patrolling alone,” Spike said with an
overprotective edge to his voice.

“Spike, I’ve been doing this for longer than I can remember. I can take
care of myself.”

“Oh, so that’s how you died three times.”

“Hey!” Buffy cried indignantly. “To be fair, I did call the shots one of
those times.”

Spike grinned. “That’s true, pet.”

“Still standing, aren’t I?” Buffy grumbled, huffily crossing her arms over
her chest and pouting.

Spike swallowed hard, fighting against the pull his body felt toward the
woman in front of him. He wanted nothing more than to take her in his arms.
Fidgeting nervously, Spike shoved his hands in the pockets of his leather
duster. “I, uh, I better go.”

“Yeah,” Buffy said quietly. “You probably should. You don’t want to be met
with World War three when you get there.”

“No, definitely not. I’ll see you tomorrow, Summers.”

“Yeah…see you then.”

As Spike turned and walked away, he felt the tumultuous feelings building
inside of him. Every time he left Buffy, he felt like he was cheating on
her by being with another woman. Never mind that the other woman was his
girlfriend who he could hardly stand to be around anymore. With a soft
groan, Spike hung his head as he made his way through the streets of
Sunnydale. His life was a mess.

Chapter 10 - Conflicting Interests


As the weeks went by, Buffy and Spike settled into a comfortable slaying
relationship. The desire was still alive and well, but they had managed to
maintain it. Buffy knew Spike had feelings for her, and she did her best to
ignore the growing affection she had for him, but she knew it would only get
harder. She thought about going back to New York, telling him her sister
needed her and leave, but she knew he wouldn’t take what she said at face
value.

All kinds of scenarios fluttered through Buffy’s head as she stared up at
the ceiling of her apartment one night. Spike had informed Wesley and Buffy
that he needed a night off. Buffy had readily agreed but felt a little
saddened by the fact that this was the first night in over a month that she
hadn’t seen him. Buffy thought about patrolling anyway but decided that
she deserved a night out. She hadn’t gone out with the intention of having
a good time since Dawnie had dragged her clubbing in New York, and even then, she’d just sat back and watched her sister have a good time.

“It can’t hurt to see if you’ve still got it, Buff,” she mumbled to herself
as she searched through her closet. Pulling out a black leather mini-skirt
and a red halter, Buffy smiled. So what if it was from her high school
days? She still looked pretty damn good. Quickly dressing and pulling on
her shoes, Buffy ran a brush through her hair and headed out the door, not
bothering to grab a coat since she couldn’t feel the cold anyway.

As Buffy walked into the Bronze a few minutes later, she smiled to herself
as several pair of eyes focused on her. Buffy surveyed the club for a few
minutes before heading out to the dance floor. She was immediately
enveloped in a group of frat boys as she danced. Smiling seductively, Buffy
swung her hips as she danced, enjoying the rush of feminine power she felt
as their eyes stayed riveted to her. As the song continued, one of the guys
got braver and stepped up to Buffy from behind, wrapping his arms around her
waist as he pulled her closer.

* * * * *

Spike entered the Bronze in an angry mood. After planning on spending the
evening with Cecily, he had left early when she kept going on and on about
how she should be the one patrolling with him and spending time with him and
not ‘that other girl.’ When her relentless nagging didn’t end after more
than an hour, Spike left her house with his temper flaring yelling at her that it was over.

Of course, she hadn’t agreed with him, but he really wasn’t concerned about what she thought.

Now, as he looked through the crowded club, he spotted a flash of blonde hair
on the dance floor, Spike looked closer and recognized Buffy. Looking
harder, Spike saw her wrapped tightly in the meaty paws of an overgrown
jock.

Stalking over to the dance floor, Spike made his way through the pack of men
until he came to stand in front of Buffy. Without saying a word, he grabbed
her wrist and proceeded to drag her out of the club. Buffy barely had a
chance to gain her footing as Spike dragged her. She knew she could get out
of his grip if she wanted to, but she also knew that it would probably end
in a physical fight if she tried, considering the rigid hold Spike had on
her.

As Buffy was dragged out of the club, Spike turned to face her. “What the
hell were you doing?!”

Buffy stared at him incredulously before getting angry herself. “What the
hell did it look like?! I was dancing!”

“Being molested is more like it!”

“And just who the hell do you think you are? My father? If I want to
dance, I’m allowed to. I don’t need your permission, Spike!” She
practically spit out his name as she walked past him, only to be grabbed by
the shoulders and shoved against the brick wall with a fuming Slayer in
front of her.

Buffy tightened her lips as she stared into Spike’s eyes. “So, what are you
gonna do, Spike? Hit me? Just because I danced with a guy, you feel the
need to go all caveman on the helpless little girl?” Buffy looked into his
burning eyes to gauge his reaction. “Well, I’ve got news for you, Spike. If
I didn’t want him touching me, he wouldn’t have been. So if you’re going
to start a fight with me, you may as well do it because I could have some
plans for the rest of the night.”

Spike tried to rein in his temper as she said it, but he couldn’t.
Imagining another man touching her in any way nearly drove him over the
edge. He lost all restraint whenever he thought about her and Angel being
intimate with each other, and that was over a decade ago. Not thinking
before he acted, Spike smashed his lips against hers in a brutal kiss.

Buffy almost felt like she was being attacked as his tongue explored her
mouth. His lips savagely attacked hers as each struggled for power over the
kiss. Spike’s arms went around her waist and pulled her closer to him as he
pushed closer to her.

Buffy felt a thrill rush through her as he ground the evidence of his
arousal against her. Her arms went up to wrap around his neck as the
vicious elements of the kiss began to be replaced with more tender caresses
of their lips. Pulling away after a few minutes, Buffy seemed to snap back
to her senses. Looking up into Spike’s eyes, she could still see the anger
in them and pushed against his chest. With one last look, she walked down
the alley, hearing the crack of something behind her. Buffy didn’t turn
around, knowing it was probably Spike hitting the wall.

Spike watched as Buffy walked away. Slamming his fist into the nearby wall
as she turned the corner, Spike clenched his jaw together. He stood there
for a few minutes thinking of what he wanted to do. His rage was telling
him to go find the guy who’d been groping the woman he wanted. His mind
told him to go patrolling and take out his aggression on the vampire
population. It was his desire that eventually won out.

“Bloody hell,” he muttered as he broke out into a jog to find Buffy. No
matter what happened with her, it was bound to be an interesting night.

Chapter 11- Passion


Spike jogged through Sunnydale, trying to see which way Buffy had gone.
Cutting through a graveyard, he heard fighting on the other side of a crypt.
Coming around the corner, Spike watched appreciatively as the Slayer
battled another vampire. He felt his temper flare again as Buffy was pinned
underneath the larger vamp. Spike waited for a few seconds to see if she
would get the upper hand before whipping out his stake and plunging it into
her attackers back.

Buffy ignored the hand that she was offered and stood on her own. Wiping
the dust from her clothes and not saying a word to him, she turned and began
walking away.

“So that it, then? No thank you for saving your life?”

Buffy whirled around to face him. “You didn’t save my life. I’m dead,
remember? All you did was save me from getting another bite mark to add to
my collection,” she said, pointing to her neck. Spike noticed the pale scar
that resided there and felt even more anger grow in him. “Angelus,” he said
with venom in his voice.

“Not just him,” Buffy said, seemingly nonchalantly. “The Master, Angel,
Dracula, then Angelus. Yep, Angel’s demon decided to claim me after he bit
me. Oh, not because he wanted me. No, it was because the claiming bite is
more painful, and that’s what he’s all about.”

“So you belong to him?” Spike had almost reached boiling point during
Buffy’s tirade, nearly exploding when she stepped forward to look him
squarely in the eyes.

“I belong to no one.”

Turning away from him, Buffy began to walk away from him, only to let out a
soft cry when she felt her arm jerk back and her body slam into the side of
the mausoleum.

“You belong to me,” Spike ground out as he trailed kisses along the column
of her neck.

“What are you? A vamp now? Sorry, baby, but you can’t claim me,” Buffy
retorted in a slightly breathless voice.

Before she knew what was going on, Spike grabbed her butt and lifted her
higher against the wall. Buffy heard a zipper and felt the material of her
thong being ripped from her body.

“I’ll claim you,” Spike growled a second before thrusting into her wet
opening. Buffy gasped, her eyes widening at the invasion, stretching her
body in ways she hadn’t felt in years, before closing them and giving in to
the feel of his assault on her. Spike held her hips in place and slammed
into her again and again, excited by the fact that Buffy was taking all of
his strength and practically begging for more.

“God, you’re so wet, baby,” Spike moaned as he pumped in and out of her.

He held on with a bruising grip as he relentlessly pounded into her
welcoming body, wrapping his muscular arms around her waist as he pulled her
closer to him. Buffy twined her fingers through his hair as she threw her
head back, losing herself in the ecstasy of the moment.

Buffy tried to break his hold on her hips as she arched against him,
desperately needing to shove her body back against his, needing to feel the
friction of their movements together, but she was surprised at the amount of
strength he possessed. Craving more contact, she pushed against him as hard
as she could as he plunged back into her body. Pushing her feet against the
wall he had her pinned against, Buffy began rocking her hips as they landed
on the ground, Spike barely contemplating the change in positions as his
hands trailed over her body, slipping his fingertips underneath her shirt to
squeeze her soft breasts. Buffy moaned as he ran the pad of his thumb over
an aching nipple. Increasing her speed, Buffy longed for release as she sat
up straight, changing the angle of her body and gasping as she felt his hand
slip down to her most sensitive spot, putting the barest pressure against
it. She panted as she felt the first pulses of pleasure that coursed
through her.

“Oh, Spike! Don’t stop…please, don’t stop!”

Spike smiled as Buffy’s body hummed with her first orgasm. “No intention of
stopping, luv,” he said in a husky whisper.

He watched as the climax took her over. Knowing that he wouldn’t be far
behind, he took the opportunity to flip them over and pound into her again.
As his body sped up, thrusting in and out of her at a rapid pace, Buffy felt
another climax closing in on her and gasped at the sensations it caused.
Bucking wildly against him, she grabbed onto Spike’s back, trying to force
him deeper, feeling herself lose complete control.

Spike pulled her arms away and loosely held her wrists above her head. “Uh
uh, pet. I’m the one in charge,” he whispered, lavishing kisses along her
jaw.

Buffy felt pleasure begin to course through her from going against her
nature and being in a more submissive role. Spike relentlessly thrust into
her, slipping a hand to the swell of her butt and pulling her even closer to
him. Buffy felt her body peak in climax as she let out a throaty scream of
pleasure. Spike ground himself into her a few more times before he felt
the explosion of his own orgasm.

Collapsing on top of her, he listened as Buffy panted for some unneeded air
as he felt his strength slowly return to him. Pushing himself up to rest
on his elbows, he leaned down and gave Buffy a gentle kiss. This seemed to
surprise her, considering the amount of damage they were trying to do to
each other no more than a minute ago, before he broke away and rolled to her
side, zipping up his pants along the way.

Buffy lay there a moment longer before slowly getting up and straightening
her clothes.

“Where are you going, luv?”

“Home,” she said softly, not making eye contact with him.

Spike was on his feet in an instant. “Did this not mean a soddin’ thing to
you?”

“It did,” she whispered before turning watery eyes up to the man she was
rapidly falling for. “And that’s why it can’t happen again.”

“And why is that?” he asked, the anger returning to his voice.

“Because I can’t let myself fall in love with you.”

Spike watched as Buffy turned and walked away from him, a look of despair on
his face. His look immediately changed when she was out of sight. Turning
and heading home, Spike smiled to himself. “Too late.”

Chapter 12 - New Arrival


Spike had stayed away from Buffy for almost a week, knowing she’d want some time to herself and also letting her feel a false sense of security that he
had given up on her. Now, as he knocked on her front door, he relished the
shocked look on her face.

“H-how did you find me?”

“A lot of research,” Spike replied with a smirk.

“Leave,” she said in a hardened voice.

“No,” he said, the smirk never leaving his face.

“Fine,” she said as she moved to shut the door. Spike quickly blocked her
move and entered the apartment.

“Nice place, luv,” he said, surveying the interior.

“I didn’t ask,” Buffy said. Spike looked at her, still standing next to the
open door with her arms crossed over her chest.

“Now, now, pet. Don’t be like that. You know you’re just a little thrilled
that I’m here,” he said, walking over and loosely taking hold of her hips.

“Spike, don’t,” she whispered, her resolve already crumbling.

“Can’t help it,” he murmured as he gently left kisses along her neck.
“Just being around you, I have to touch you.”

Buffy closed her eyes, relishing the feel of his lips on her skin, before
gently pushing him away. “Spike, we can’t do this.”

“And why’s that?”

Buffy strained to find a reason, visibly pleased with herself when she
thought of one. “You have a girlfriend.”

Spike lightly ran his tongue over his lips as he stared at her hungrily.
“Says who?”

“Wh-what?”

“You really think,” he began, wrapping his arms around her again. “That
after I’ve been with you, I would willingly go back to her?  I told her a week ago that it was over.”

Buffy looked down, noticing their bodies intimately pressed together. She
could have sworn she felt her heart flop for a moment.

“Spike,” she said softly. “I’m not saying it was a mistake. Because it
wasn’t,” she said urgently, looking up into his eyes. “But, I think we need
to slow it down.”

“What do you mean slow down? Buffy, we’ve already shagged- there’s no
reason to get shy on me now,” he said, getting angry.

Buffy carefully masked her feelings as she looked into his eyes. “So you
only want to be with me if I’ll keep screwing you, is that it?” she asked
calmly.

Spike clenched his teeth together, looking at the ceiling. “Bloody hell,
Slayer. I didn’t say that. Stop putting words in my mouth.”

Buffy disentangled herself from his grasp and moved toward the door. “Thanks
for stopping by.”

“Buffy, don’t be like this. Come on, luv, I just came over to see if you
wanted to go patrolling.”

Buffy contemplated him for a minute before nodding. “Okay. Let me get
changed.”

Spike nodded and waited by the door as Buffy disappeared into her bedroom.
When she reemerged, Spike felt his mouth go dry as she headed toward him.
She had changed into a pair of black leather pants and a snug-fitting
white shirt with a low V-neck. Spike had to look away before he was
affected in more ways than one.

“Ready?”

“Let’s go, luv.”

* * * * *

After more than an hour of patrolling, Buffy was ready to call it quits.
They had staked one vampire and hadn’t even spotted any others.

“Where are they tonight?” she grumbled.

Spike smiled at the childish note in her voice. “Honestly don’t know, pet.
I didn’t get the memo.”

Buffy glared at his smart-ass attitude and then turned when she heard a
noise. Spike noticed the change in her look and stopped to wait with her.

“This way,” Buffy mumbled.

“What’s wrong, luv?”

“Sounds like someone’s fighting, but you and I are both right here.”

Spike broke into a jog. “It could be Gunn. Sometimes he cuts through on his
way home from Fred’s.”

Buffy jogged with him until the people fighting came into view. Both
skidded to a stop at what they encountered. A woman in black dress pants
and a blood red top was currently kicking the crap out of a vampire. Buffy
and Spike stood with gaping mouths as she landed a high-spinning kick to the
vamp’s head before turning with a fluid motion and shoving a stake in his
heart.

Buffy gripped her stake as the woman turned to face them. Slipping out of
her game-face, she began to talk toward Buffy and Spike, both clutching their
weapons. Buffy gasped as she drew closer and was able to get a good
look at her. Her dark chestnut hair fell half-way down her back, and the
closer she got, Buffy could see the resemblance between herself and this
stranger. It appeared that the woman was just as shocked to see a woman who
could have been her twin standing in front of her. While Buffy’s eyes were
hazel, the woman’s were brown. Her lips weren’t quite as full, and she was
an inch or two taller, but the resemblance was remarkable.

“You must be Spike,” she said with a soft voice. “I’m Cassidy.”

Spike stared at her for a moment, obviously trying to get over the
resemblance. “And how do you know me, luv?”

“Everyone knows the Slayer, but I’m afraid I don’t know you,” she said,
turning to Buffy, who was looking at her skeptically.

“Apparently you need a history lesson then. I’m Buffy Summers.”

The shock was evident on the woman’s face as she stared at the other Slayer.
“But you’re dead.”

“Yep…and still kickin’.”

“But you’re not a vampire. I would have heard.”

Buffy let her fangs lengthen as her eyes turned a remarkable shade of
lavender. Spike stared at her in surprise, realizing he’d never seen her
version of a game-face. As she turned to look at him, he stared at her
eyes, shocked that they weren’t the typical amber color.

Buffy shrugged. “I don’t know why,” she said, answering his unasked
question before turning her attention back to the woman. “So…Cassidy, what
do you want?”

“I want to help.”

Buffy looked at her doubtfully. “You want to help? With what, making sure
the human population doesn’t get too high?”

“I want to fight,” she said, directing her attention at Spike. “I want to
help you.”

“Why’s that, luv?”

Buffy noticed the way Spike was staring at the woman and felt a twinge of
jealousy.

“I have a soul.”

Buffy’s head snapped around to stare at Cassidy. “You have a soul?” she
scoffed. “You do realize they don’t just stand in line and hand those out.”

“Give her a chance, luv,” Spike said, putting a restraining hand on her arm.

“A chance to what, Spike? Get you to feel all safe and comfortable and then
go in for the kill? Why bother giving her a chance? You didn’t give me
one.”

“I did, Slayer, it just took a little longer.” Turning his attention to
Cassidy, he continued, “How’d you get a soul?”

“I was cursed…I’m not sure by who.”

“Excuse us,” Buffy said with false sincerity as she grabbed Spike’s arm and
led him away. When they were safely out of hearing distance, Buffy let go
and spun around to face him. “Are you crazy? You must really have a death
wish!”

“Calm down, Buffy. Shouldn’t we give her the benefit of the doubt?”

“No! No benefit, only doubt! I don’t like this, Spike. Any vampire can
come up to you and tell you that they have a soul. It doesn’t mean they do,
and there’s no way to check for it.”

“Buffy, I can take care of myself, and if this chit wants to stake a few
vamps, then that’s fine by me.”

“Spike-“

“No, Buffy, I know what I’m doing.” Buffy watched as he turned and headed
back to the woman. The female part of her wanted to leave in a huff of not
being listened to, but the Slayer part nagged at her to follow this
untrustworthy vampire. Buffy didn’t like her, no matter what Spike’s
feeling was. Slowly trailing after him, she heard them laughing over
something Cassidy had said, and it almost made her feel sick.

Coming up to stand next to Spike, Buffy stood silently for a few seconds
before Spike turned to her. “We’re going to the Bronze, luv. You wanna tag
along?”

Buffy looked at him incredulously as he asked, and the female part of her
finally won. “No, I really don’t.”

Turning and walking through the cemetery, Spike noticed that she was walking
away from the direction of her apartment, but he shrugged it off. Putting a
hand on Cassidy’s back, he began to lead her to the Bronze.

Chapter 13 - Jealousy


Buffy wandered through town aimlessly for over an hour. She had held off on
shedding any tears, not wanting to start and not be able to stop. It hurt
that Spike didn’t trust her judgment, but it hurt even worse that he had
chosen that imposter over her.

Walking down Main Street a few minutes later, Buffy hugged her arms tightly
to her chest. She felt more alone now than she had when she first arrived
in Sunnydale.

“Hey!”

Buffy turned at the sound of the male voice and watched as a man jogged up
to her. She refrained from getting into fighting stance as he approached.
He didn’t look like a threat, and if he was, Buffy was sure she could take
care of him in less than a minute.

“I know you.”

Buffy looked at him, puzzled. “I don’t think so.”

“No, you’re sisters with a girl I knew. Dawn…Summers, I think.”

“You know Dawn?”

“Yeah, I graduated with her, and you’re her sister…Bunny?”

“Buffy,” she replied with a laugh. “And you are?”

“Oh, sorry, I’m RJ Brooks.”

“Star Sunnydale High quarterback,” Buffy said, nodding. “I remember you.”

“Yeah, you graduated a couple of years before me. I didn’t know if you’d
remember, but damn, you’re looking good!”

Buffy laughed at the compliment. “Thank you.”

“Well, listen, I was wondering if you’d want to go get a drink with me?”

“I-I don’t know. It’s getting pretty late, and-“

“Aw, come on. Just one little drink, and it’s right around the corner.”

Buffy sighed. “What the hell? I need to loosen up a little, I guess. Let’s
go.”

“Great!” RJ said as he led her to the Bronze.

Buffy paused for a moment before going in. What if Spike was still there?
Taking an unneeded breath, Buffy headed into the club. Who cares if he sees
her? He did bring another woman with him. He couldn’t dictate her life,
especially when he was drooling over her look-alike.

Buffy followed RJ through the club. The Bronze was crowded since it was the
weekend, which explained why the vampires weren’t out yet. They were all
waiting for people to go home. Buffy scanned the interior, not seeing Spike,
and let RJ lead her to a table. As he took off to get their drinks, Buffy
watched him go. He really wasn’t that bad to look at. He had that
wholesome, boy next door quality. Unfortunately, Buffy was finding herself
attracted to the bad boy look as of late. ‘What the hell,’ she thought.
‘It’s not like this would be a long-term relationship. You may as well have
some fun, Buffy.’

* * * * *

Spike stood with Cassidy on the balcony of the Bronze. He didn’t understand
why he felt so drawn to her, aside from her obvious resemblance to Buffy,
but he didn’t stop to analyze it either.

She had been shamelessly flirting with him all night, but Spike’s mind kept
getting drawn back to the hurt expression on Buffy’s face as she had walked
away from him tonight. He didn’t mean to hurt her feelings- he just wanted
her to relax a little bit, which was why he had suggested the Bronze.
Thinking that if they heard Cassidy’s side of the story, she’d be more
forthcoming with the benefit of the doubt. Instead, she had turned around
and gone the other way. Spike had seen the emotions dancing in her eyes
but chose to ignore it at the time. Now he was feeling guilty. Especially
as Cassidy plastered herself to his side.

There was no doubt he was attracted to her, but his thoughts always went
back to Buffy. Now as he stared over the railing of the balcony, listening
to Cassidy talk his ear off, he caught sight of Buffy.
Jealousy filled him as he watched a man hand her a drink and sit down next
to her.

‘She said she wasn’t coming,’ he thought angrily. ‘Then she shows up with
some ponce I’ve never even seen before and sits there, having a drink with
him?’

Spike watched for several more minutes as Buffy and the stranger flirted
before grabbing Cassidy’s hand and leading her down the stairs and to the
dance floor. Wrapping her securely in his arms as the slow music continued,
he felt her body drape around him in a seductive manner. Looking up, he
caught Buffy’s eye, and his gut twisted at the sorrow on her face. He
watched as she turned to the man and said something to him before getting
up and walking out of the Bronze with him practically tripping over himself.

“Cassidy, I think we better call it a night, luv.”

“But we just got here,” she purred.

“It’s been a while, and there’s some place I need to be.”

The girl in front of him pouted, and Spike was disturbed to realize that it
had nearly the same effect on him that Buffy’s did. Pulling away from her,
he gave her a nod. “I’ll see you soon, pet. I really need to go.”

Not giving her a second glance, Spike made his way to the exit. Quickly
walking to Main Street, Spike didn’t see her anywhere. He walked up and
down the street once, checking the alleys before he felt his stomach drop at
the thought of her taking the man back to her place. Breaking into a run,
Spike made his way to Buffy’s apartment.

 * * * * *

Buffy unlocked her door before turning back to RJ. “Thanks for walking me
home, RJ, but it really wasn’t necessary.”

“Well, I always make sure that my dates arrive home okay.”

“Date?”

“Poor choice of words, sorry.”

“That’s okay,” Buffy said with a smile. “I’m sorry I had to cut the night
short. I’m just not feeling too well.”

“That’s okay. I’m glad I ran into you. Maybe I can run into you again
sometime?”

“Maybe,” she said with a coy smile. “I had fun, RJ.” Buffy leaned up and
kissed the taller man on his cheek before pulling away.

“I’ll see you, Buffy,” he said with an answering smile. Turning around, RJ
faced a very irritated man coming up behind him. Buffy noticed him at the
same time and gritted her teeth.

Spike looked right at Buffy, ignoring the other man. “We need to talk.”

“Buffy, will you be okay if I leave?”

Buffy plastered a smile on her face and looked at RJ. “I’ll be fine.
Nothing to worry about here. You go ahead.”

RJ nodded, not entirely convinced, but he flashed her a smile anyway before
heading down the steps to the patio as Buffy turned cold eyes on Spike. “We
have nothing to talk about.”

“Like hell,” Spike said, pushing past her and entering the apartment. Buffy
sighed and followed him in, slamming the door behind her.

“Why are you even here, Spike? I thought you’d be off with your new girl.”

“Bloody hell, Slayer, I invited you to come along!” Spike yelled.

“I’m really not looking to experience a ménage a trios, but thanks for
thinking of me,” she replied, crossing her arms over her chest and raising
an eyebrow at him.

Spike was across the room in less than a second, pinning her to the door as
he smashed his lips to hers. Buffy, infuriated, pushed him away. “What the
hell are you doing?”

Spike didn’t answer, just swung her up over his shoulder, carrying her to
the bedroom and throwing her down on the bed.

Buffy scrambled up the bed as Spike began shedding his clothes. “I asked you
a question.”

“Well, luv,” he began, unbuttoning his shirt. “Right now, I’m too pissed at
you to get a soddin’ thought in my head. So the way I see it, you have two
options. One-we beat the living hell out of each other, or two-I shag you
and get some of this aggression out. Either way, luv, you’re gonna get it.”

Buffy propped herself up on her knees. “How dare you! You think just
because I ‘shagged’ you once I’ll do it again? You really have a lot of-“

Her words were silenced as Spike grabbed each side of her face and planted a
gentle kiss on her lips. Pulling away, she glared daggers at him. “Don’t
think that’ll get you off the hook.”

“No…but this will,” he said with a smirk as he dropped his pants to the
floor.

Buffy raised an eyebrow. “Got a high opinion of yourself, don’t you?”

“Haven’t heard any complaining, luv,” he said, pulling her off the bed as he
slipped her leather pants and thong to the floor. Raising up, Spike grabbed
the hem of her shirt and dragged it over her head, pulling her bra off with
it. “Got any more quick retorts, pet?”

Buffy looked at him with loathing as he stepped forward. “Don’t think that you’re forgiven.”

“Wouldn’t dream of thinkin’ it, pet.”

“What am I, your second choice tonight?”

“Just what the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“It means, you were practically being smothered by your new little admirer,
and now you’re here with me. Why?”

Spike shoved her down on the bed and climbed on top of her. “It means that
I want you. It means that I’m falling for you, and I have never wanted to
kill a human more than when I saw you and that pillock tonight.” Kissing
down the length of her throat, Spike continued. “I thought I was going to go
crazy when I imagined you coming home with him…doing what you’re doing to
me.”

“Mmmm,” Buffy moaned. “I’m not doing anything to you.”

“You have no idea what you do to men, baby. Not just me.”

Buffy arched her neck for more contact. “I wasn’t going to-“

“I know, luv. I just don’t like thinking of it.”

Buffy wrapped her legs around Spike’s waist as the tip of his shaft probed
at her entrance. Pushing into her in one smooth motion, Spike stayed still
for a minute as she adjusted, kissing her softly as her hands came up to
wrap around his shoulders.

“You’re mine, Buffy. You belong to me,” Spike ground out as he began
pumping in and out of her.

“I don’t belong to anyone,” Buffy countered, thrusting herself back up to
meet him.

Spike growled at her defiance, grabbing her hips to try and get some relief
from the anger and tension she was causing him.

“You’re beyond frustrating, do you know that?” he said as he reached in
between them to softly brush a finger over her most sensitive area, stopping
after a few seconds.

“Spike,” she gasped, feeling the loss of sensations and desperately craving
it.

“You’re mine, Buffy,” he repeated.

“No!” she said, looking at him in defiance before quickly flipping them.
Once she was on top, she rapidly rode him as his fingers held onto her hips,
bruising the skin that had only just healed from their last escapade in the
cemetery.

Buffy felt her climax nearing as Spike physically moved her up and down on
his hard erection. Grinding down onto him and moving her hips in a small
circle, Buffy screamed out her release as she saw stars dancing in front of
her eyes. Spike pumped into her a few more times before pulsing deep
inside her welcoming body.

As Buffy fell forward, Spike softly began stroking her back, enjoying the
fact that she wasn’t jumping up to kick him out of her home. Deciding if he
wanted to stay the night, he better adjust his attitude. Spike buried his
face in her hair as he wrapped his arms securely around her waist. “I’m
sorry, Buffy.”

Buffy raised up to look at him with watery eyes. “Me, too.”

Spike smiled and pulled her forward to kiss her gently before moving her to
lay next to him on the bed. Buffy snuggled up against his chest, enjoying
the warmth he provided, and closed her eyes. Feeling content for the first
time in years, both drifted off to sleep.

Chapter 14 - Betrayal


A few weeks went by unremarkably. Buffy had been in Sunnydale for almost
three months, and she and Spike had settled into a semi-comfortable
relationship, with Spike spending most of his nights over at Buffy’s place.
Cassidy had begun to patrol with them, and Buffy hated her even more than she
had before. Whenever Spike wasn’t looking, she always threw glares at Buffy
and tried to get physically closer to Spike.

When Buffy confided in Spike about her worries, he told her she was
overreacting and not to worry about the woman. Buffy had agreed but
secretly still kept an eye on the untrustworthy woman. She had gone to
Wesley and told him of the problems she was having with the woman, and Wes
had been kind enough to do a little research for her. He had come up with
very little, only finding out that she was over sixty years old and had
always flown under the radar.

As the group was patrolling one night, Buffy kept a careful eye on the
woman to her left.  Buffy knew if it came down to it, she could take Cassidy
in a fight.  All she was waiting for was the first punch to be thrown.

Suddenly, all three heads turned as they heard a scream coming from
their right.  As they began running toward it, five vampires and a woman were
seen in the distance.  As another scream sounded from a remote location of
the cemetery, Buffy glanced in that direction.

“You go,” Cassidy said.  “Spike and I can handle this group.”

Buffy glared at the woman, but now was not the time to start a fight
over a petty situation.  Buffy took off to where the other scream came from. 
Running at full-speed, she saw a group of five vampires surrounding a
man who already had blood running down his neck.  The man made eye contact as Buffy got closer and silently pleaded with her to help in some way.

Buffy slowed her pace as she got closer.  “Hey,” she said, twirling her
stake from hand to hand as the group turned their attention to her.  “Didn’t
anyone ever tell you not to play with your food?”

Her question was answered by numerous growls as they all turned their
attention to her.  “No?” she asked.  “Oh well." Quickly pulling a stake
from under her black turtleneck, Buffy let it fly into the chest of the
nearest vampire as the rest charged her.  Throwing numerous kicks and punches, she managed to stake another, letting the number dwindle to three.  After several minutes of fending them off, Buffy felt herself begin to tire. 
Seeing a lucky break, she plunged another stake into a vamp that wasn’t
paying close enough attention.  As the two vamps remaining charged her,
Buffy felt a mild sense of panic as each one took an arm and threw her
into a tree, never letting go of her.  Buffy felt a pop in her back but
ignored it, focusing on her predicament.

“Don’t take it personally.” Buffy shuddered as vamp number one
whispered in her ear.  “I mean, I’d love to take out a Slayer anyway, but we’re
just doing what we have to do.”

Buffy struggled against their hold as both sets of fangs came toward her
neck.  She knew she couldn’t be killed by being drained, but she really
didn’t feel like being incapacitated long enough for them to stake her. 
Her Slayer alarms sounded in her head as they got too close before she was
suddenly released on one side.  Taking advantage, Buffy threw a high
kick into the face of the attacker that held her and staked him before
turning to the other.  She noticed then that he let her go because the man they
were about to kill must have hit him.  Buffy grabbed the vamp as he was
preparing to sink his teeth into the man’s neck and threw him several paces away.

“What do you mean, you’re doing what you have to do?”  Buffy asked as
they circled each other.

“We were paid to take out the Slayer.  That’s what we were doing.”

“The Slayer is a man.”

“No, you were the previous Slayer.  The most powerful- you were the one
chosen.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard the terminology.  Who sent you?”

“You think I’d tell you?”

Buffy threw her stake into his heart. “Didn’t hurt to ask.”

As the dust settled, Buffy turned to the man.  “Thanks for the help.”

“It was the least I could do. I mean, you saved me from five of those
things.”

“Yeah, well, it’s a first for me, having the person preyed upon help.”

“How’d you do that?”

“It’s my job,” she said with a shrug.

“There were more,” he said, suddenly panicking.  “My girlfriend and I
got separated, and some went after her.”

“She should be okay.”

At that moment, a young woman came running at the man and threw herself
into his arms.

“You should get home,” Buffy told them.

“Yeah…thank you,” he said as he led his girlfriend away.

Buffy let out a slow groan as she felt the pain in her lower back.  Twisting it, she managed to pop it and release some of the pressure, but the pain still wrenched her back every time she moved.

Turning around, she saw Spike and Cassidy approaching, the woman
practically hanging off of Spike as they smiled at something.  Feeling hatred fill
her, Buffy moved forward, a slight limp in her step.  As she approached
Cassidy, Buffy let her fist fly to land solidly on the other girl’s jaw.

“Buffy, what the bloody hell are you doing?” Spike asked as he helped
the injured vamp off the ground.

Buffy gave him a look before turning to face the woman.  “You bitch,”
she spat out.  “You set me up.”

“What are you talking about?” Cassidy asked with an innocent face.

“You set all this up!  You had your little gang of vamps split up the
couple so you could send me to take on five at once!”

“Slayer, what are you going on about?”

Buffy glared at him as she looked pointedly to where he still held Cassidy’s elbow.  “What I’m going on about is your little friend here decided to set
up an ambush for me.  I would be dead right now if that guy hadn’t
stepped in and helped me.”

“That’s kind of a stretch that Cassidy had anything to do with it, luv.”

“You don’t believe me?” she asked disbelievingly.  “You think she’s
just Little Miss Innocent with a soul?  She’s not,” she said, getting
angrier.  “I am standing here today because for half my life, I have trusted my
instincts.  And right now, they’re telling me not to trust her.  Please, believe
me, Spike.”  Her eyes looked into his, almost pleading with him.

“Buffy, I’d like to, but there’s no reason to suspect anything.”

“I think those vamps telling me someone paid them to take me out is a
pretty damn good reason to suspect something!”

“Buffy,” Cassidy spoke up.  “I would never do anything to get you hurt.”

“Shut it, princess.”

“Buffy, you help Spike, and I would never put him in any danger.”

Buffy glared at the girl before turning her attention to Spike.  “Do
you believe me or not?”

“Luv, I want to, but I can’t without-“

“That’s all I need to hear,” Buffy said, beginning to painfully walk
away.

“Buffy, wait, baby!”

“No,” she said, spinning around to face him.  “You don’t believe me. 
You obviously don’t trust my judgment, so why do you need me?  You have my
doppelganger right there, whispering sweet nothings in your ear all the
time!  I can’t be with someone who doesn’t have faith in me.”  Buffy turned
and began walking away again.

“Buffy!”

“Oh, and for the record,” she said, turning to face him once more,
sarcasm lacing through her voice.  “I’m the one with the potentially broken
back, and you have your arms around her!  Don’t worry about me- thanks for the concern, but I’ll be fine!”  Buffy quickly walked away, trying her best to ignore the agonizing pain in her back as she slipped a hand behind her
to offer herself some support.

Spike nearly chased after her as he felt pressure on his arm.  Looking
down at Cassidy, she spoke, “You should let her cool off.  Will you help me
home?” Softly batting her eyelashes, Spike looked at her and then to
the path Buffy had disappeared to.

“Yeah, pet.  I can do that.”

* * * * *

Buffy made it home faster than she anticipated.  She couldn’t believe
Spike didn’t trust her.  Buffy called a cab, not wanting to walk anymore than
she had to.  Quickly pulling a suitcase and a large shoulder bag from her
closet, Buffy filled them with as many belongings as she could. 
Emptying most of her closet and dresser, she went into the bathroom and began pulling toiletries out and throwing them into a small carrying case.  Buffy
threw the case into her suitcase and packed a few more possessions, pausing
to look at the picture of herself with Willow and Xander, taken when they
were in high school.  She finally let the tears flow as so many memories and
feelings came crashing down on top of her.

Packing the picture, she looked at another one that Fred had taken a
few weeks ago at the Bronze.  Buffy was sitting in Spike’s lap, and they
were both looking into each other's eyes and laughing at something that Buffy
couldn’t even remember.  Leaving the picture on the table by her bed,
Buffy hoisted the suitcase and bag off the mattress and headed for the door
as she heard the cab honk.

She knew it was the cowards way out, but she had to leave.  She
couldn’t stick around and watch as Cassidy and Spike grew closer together. 
Grabbing a black ski cap from the table at the door, Buffy tucked her long
blonde hair underneath it and headed outside, gently shutting the door behind
her.

* * * * *

Spike helped Cassidy to the small house she was renting on the other
side of town.  Once she was through the door, Spike turned to find Buffy.

“Wait!” she cried from inside.  “Don’t you want to stay for a while?”

Spike watched skeptically as Cassidy made her way back to his side,
putting her arms around his neck.

“I thought we could have some fun, Spike.” Her lips came closer to his,
pulling him down to meet her.  Spike snapped out of it at the last
second, disentangling herself from her arms.

“I’m sorry, luv.  I can’t do this.  I can’t hurt Buffy this way.”

“She’s already mad, Spike.  What difference does it make if she knows
or not?”

“The difference is that I would know, and I’m not going to do that to her,” Spike said,
walking down the front steps.

“Spike, she doesn’t want you.  Don’t you see that?  She left you and I
together for a reason.”

“No, she didn’t.  She’s hurt, and I’ve gotta go.”

Spike jogged through town, stopping at a grocery store that sold flower
arrangements to buy a half-dozen red roses in an apology.

Walking up to Buffy’s apartment, Spike knocked on the door and waited. 
When there was no answer, he tried the knob and was surprised when it opened without resistance.  Slowly walking through the doorway, Spike laid the
flowers on the kitchen bar.  Looking through the apartment, something
felt off.

“Buffy?”

He slowly made his way to her bedroom.

“Buffy?  Answer me, baby.”

As soon as Spike opened the bedroom door, he felt sick.  The room was
practically stripped.  The closet door hung open, showing its few
remaining contents.  Dresser drawers were left open haphazardly, and Spike saw that the picture of Buffy and her friends was gone.  Feeling slightly
lightheaded, Spike walked over to the nightstand and saw the picture of the two of them, sitting crookedly on the surface.  Suddenly gasping for air, Spike sat on the bed.  Buffy was gone.

Chapter 15 - Old Friends


Buffy left the bus station in Los Angeles and hailed a cab.  Sunrise
was approaching, and she really didn’t want to be on the receiving end of
it.  Giving the cab driver directions, Buffy stared out the window as the
buildings whizzed by.  Paying the driver as he arrived at her destination,
Buffy gathered her luggage and made her way to the door of the hotel. 
As Buffy passed through it, she noticed that the lobby was empty.

“Hello?”

Turning in a circle, Buffy set her luggage down on a nearby couch and
pulled the cap off her head, letting her hair spill out around her shoulders.

“Anyone here?”

Seeing a movement out of the corner of her eye, Buffy turned and
offered a sheepish smile to the confused man in front of her.  “Angel.”

“Buffy…what’re you doing here?”

“I, uh, I kind of need a place to crash…for a while.  Was hoping maybe
you could help me with that.”

“Of course.  I’m sorry, I just haven’t seen you in so long and…is
something wrong?”

“It’s a long-“

“Buffy!”

Buffy turned to one of the staircases and saw Cordelia Chase rushing
down.  “It’s been forever!  How are you?  What’s wrong?” she asked as she got
close enough to see her swollen eyes and give her a hug.

Buffy was taken aback by Cordy’s friendly demeanor.  This was
definitely not the same girl she’d last seen prancing around, pretending to be Angel’s secretary all those years ago.  The years had aged her into a beautiful
woman, and she seemed to have more compassion than she had ever shown
Buffy in high school.

“It’s a long story.”

“Buffy needs a place to stay,” Angel spoke up.

“Well, of course you’re staying here.  Angel, take her things up to a room.”

Buffy had to smile at the bossy demeanor- some things never change.

“Is something wrong with Angel?” she asked Cordy once Angel was out of
hearing distance.

“Oh, you know Mr. Tall, Dark, and Broody.  He always has to find
something that’s bothering him.  You’re usually number one on the list of things
to brood about, so seeing you in the flesh after so long…” Cordelia trailed off.

“Me?  Why me?”

“He killed you.  Well, technically, anyway.  And then he sired you, and
he’s scared that you hold it against him.”

“I don’t,” Buffy replied, shaking her head.  “It wasn’t him…it was
Angelus.  I’ve figured out the difference between the two.”

“Could you please tell him that?  Because he’s been moaning about it for the last decade.”

“As soon as I get a good opportunity.  So, how are things between you two?”

“Great,” Cordy said as she broke out in a bright smile.  “Having the
soul anchored is a major plus, and he tells me he loves me every chance he
gets.  A girl never gets tired of hearing that.”

“Yeah,” Buffy said, looking down at the floor.  “I know.”

“Oh, Buffy!  I’m sorry!  I didn’t mean to practically rub it in your face
about me and Angel. It’s just been so long since you two were together,
and I just forget sometimes.”

“Cordy, it’s okay.  I-I wasn’t thinking about Angel.  There’s someone
else.”

“Well, that’s great, but…wait.  If there’s someone else, why are you
here?”

“That’s what I was wondering,” Angel said, reemerging from upstairs. 
“What’s going on, Buffy?”

Buffy took a deep breath, trying to calm her nerves before beginning. 
“I went back to Sunnydale a few months ago.  I-I thought it would be a
good idea to…help out the new Slayer.  I met him, and we started patrolling
together.  Wesley is his Watcher, by the way,” she said with a small
smile.

“Wesley!” Cordelia cried.  “Oh my God, I haven’t thought about him in
years! How is he?”

“He’s good.  Much more laid back than he used to be.  He’s definitely a
much better Watcher now.”

“Anyway…” Angel prodded, trying to steer the girls away from the boy-talk.

Buffy and Cordy shared a small, knowing smile as she continued.  “We
got really close after a while...really close,” she said, emphasizing it
the second time.  “And another girl came along.  Claims she’s a vampire
with a soul,” she said, sharing a knowing look with Angel.

“But that’s impossible,” Angel said in disbelief.

“That’s what I said.  I asked Wes to do some research on her and came
up with a big zero, except for her age.  She’s not a Slayer, and she claims
she was cursed…though we don’t know by who, and apparently, neither did
she.”

“Sounds a little out of the ordinary,” Angel said.

“My thoughts exactly.  Earlier tonight, the three of us split up when
there were two vamp attacks in different areas.  I got a group of five and
was barely holding on.  That’s when the vamps said the strangest thing. 
They said they were doing what they were paid to do, and that was to take out
the Slayer…me…not Spike.”

“Spike?” Cordelia asked.

“He’s the new Slayer.”

“Hottie?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Oh yeah.”

“Can we get back on topic please?” Angel interrupted.

“Sorry.  So anyway, I stake the vamps and go and punch this Cassidy
chick, who, by the way, really deserved it since she can’t keep her hands off
Spike, but he gets all defensive and doesn’t believe me when I tell him
what I found out.  So there I am, standing there in obvious physical pain,
and he just…he just…” she trailed off as her emotions caught up to her.

“Buffy,” Angel said softly.  “I’m sure that he just didn’t know what
to believe.  You’ve only known him a few months, and-“

“Angel,” Cordy cut him off as she wrapped an arm around the tearful Slayer. 
“She loves him,” she said quietly.

“Oh,” he said with raised eyebrows.

“I just couldn’t stay,” she said in a strained whisper.  “He was being
all protective with her, just because I hit her. And I was standing there
with broken bones, and he barely even looked at me.”

“You’re hurt?” they both asked simultaneously.

“I don’t know.  My back still hurts, but that’s normal considering how recently it happened.”

Both Cordelia and Angel turned her around. She felt Angel gently probing
her back.  As Buffy hissed in pain when he got closer to her hips, Cordy
went to get a first aid kit.

“I think it’s fractured.  Looks like you’ll be fine in a day or two with the accelerated healing,
but it’ll probably swell later today.”

Cordelia reappeared with the kit and pulled out some cotton and
alcohol.  “You’ve got a cut on your head.”

Buffy reached up to her forehead and felt the gash that resided there. 
“Great,” she mumbled.  “Just add to my night.”

“Let Cordy clean that up, and then I’ll show you to your room.”

“Thanks, Angel,” Buffy said with a soft smile.  Wincing in pain as the
alcohol burned her skin, she exhaled as the butterfly strips were put
in place.

“All set,” Cordy said, cleaning up.

“Thanks, guys.  And I promise not to be here very long. I just need to
figure out what to do next.”

“Buffy, you’re welcome here as long as you want,” Cordy said.

“Thanks,” she replied with a grateful smile as she followed Angel up
the stairs.  Following him to a suite at the end of the hall, Buffy gasped
when he opened the door.  “Angel, it’s beautiful,” she said, taking in the
room.

“Pretty much the only one that’s fit for staying in.”

“It’s perfect, thank you!” she said, turning and giving him a hug.  She
felt Angel tense at their close proximity and pulled away to look up into
his eyes.  “Angel…I want you to know…I don’t blame you for what happened.”

“For what happened?” he repeated.

“The whole happiness clause.  It’s not like you let Angelus come out
and play,” she continued as she went to sit on the bed.

Angel followed her, sitting down beside her. “Buffy, I never meant-“

“I know,” she said, cutting him off.  “I know it wasn’t you. You had no
control, and I’m really not mad.  Besides…it’s not all bad being a
vampire.  I mean, the whole drinking blood thing still kind of wigs me out, but
that’s life…or unlife, as the case may be.”

“Buffy, I tortured you-“

“Again, with the not being you that did it.”

“I…he raped you,” he said quietly, looking down at his hands.

“He did…but I’m strong.  I healed, and I know that there’s no chance of
him doing it again.  I forgive you, Angel.  I figure I’m going to know you
for the rest of my unlife.  I need you as my friend…not as a stranger.”

“I still love you, Buffy,” he said softly.  Buffy stayed quiet as he
continued, “Not in the same way it used to be, but it’s there.  I’m in
love with Cordy, but I do still love you.”

“I know…believe me, I know.”

“Do you think you did the right thing?  Leaving town, I mean?”

Buffy looked into his eyes. “Did you do the right thing when you left me?”

“Different situation, Buffy.”

“Yeah.  I don’t have an answer for you.  I couldn’t stick around.  He
was the only person keeping me there, and the thought of losing him to her…I
just thought it was better to be the first to let go.”

“You can stay here as long as you need to, Buffy.  Whenever you feel up
to it, maybe you could help Cordy and me with some cases,” Angel said,
standing to leave the room.  “And Buffy, if you love this guy, maybe he is worth it.”

“Thank you,” she said with a grateful smile.  “Good night, Angel.”

“Good night, Buffy.”

* * * * *

Spike stood outside Wesley’s house, banging on the door.  When the
door opened to reveal a very irritated man, Spike didn’t even pay attention
to him.  “Buffy’s gone, Wes.”

“What are you talking about, William?”

“Gone…packed up her stuff and left!”

“Left town?”

“Bloody hell!  I don’t know!”

“Calm down and tell me what happened.”

“I don’t know, Wes,” Spike said, dropping down to sit on the couch. 
“She got really paranoid about Cassidy planning an ambush on her and then
got mad at me for defending her and took off.  But, you wanna know the real kicker?  I don’t know why I defended her.  Every part of me wanted to chase after Buffy, and I couldn’t.  I physically couldn’t, Wes, and I didn’t even realize something was wrong until about an hour ago.  I need to know what’s going on.”

“Oh dear, I was afraid of this.”

“What do you mean you were afraid of this?” Spike yelled, rising
angrily from his position.

“Will, Buffy’s been worried about how close you’ve been getting to Cassidy. 
She doesn’t trust her, and she asked me to do some research on her. 

”And?”

“Nothing came up.  And believe me when I say nothing.  She’s about
sixty years old, give or take a few years, and other than that, it’s as if she
doesn’t exist.  I don’t think Cassidy is even her real name. I think she may be using some type dark magic to get you to trust her...to build some type of relationship with her.”

“Are you saying I’ve been under some kind of spell this whole time?”

“No.  Not necessarily the whole time, just whenever you’re in close proximity with Cassidy.  You still want to be with Buffy, don’t you?”

“You know I do,” Spike growled.  “She’s gone, Wesley, and it’s all my fault, because I’m not strong enough to tell this chit to bugger off.”

“William, you wouldn’t have control over your actions.  You need to be very careful.  This kind of magic is what got the slayer, Kendra, killed.  Although, the vampire that used it on her appears to be much more advanced than Cassidy, since you were obviously alone with her last night and you’re still alive.”

“She tried to get me to stay,” he mumbled softly, before turning his eyes to his watcher’s.  “Last night, she tried to get me to stay longer, but I knew I had to get to Buffy.”

“She’s a novice.  If it is a thrall, she can only hold on to it for short periods of time.  It was probably fading at the time she asked you to stay.”

Spike collapsed on the couch again, his head falling into his hands as
he tried to keep control over his emotions.  “I have to find Buffy, Wesley.  She thinks I willingly picked Cassidy over her.  Bloody hell, I need some kind of resistance to this magic, Wes,”
his muffled voice said.  “Whatever mojo she’s worked on me, I defended the bint for crying out loud,” his voice getting louder as he looked up with bloodshot eyes. 

“I think you already have a resistance.”

“What’s that?”

“You’re in love with Buffy.  No matter what you might be saying out loud, you know that you’re in love with her and that helps protect you.”

“I can’t lose her.”

“William…she may already be lost,” Wesley said gently.

“She bloody well is not!  Find her, Wesley!”

“Will, if she doesn’t want to be found-”

“I don’t soddin’ care what she wants.  She has to know what really happened.  I need her Wesley…find her.” 
Storming out of the house, Spike slammed the door behind him.  He felt
lost without Buffy, and he had only been without her for a few hours.

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