Chapter 10 – Conversations


Spike wearily knocked on his cousin’s door later that night. Xander’s eyes
widened when he opened the door.

“Spike…what the hell happened to you?”

“She left me, Xander…I told her I loved her, and it was too late.”

Xander turned to his wife and motioned for Anya to stay in the house as he
walked out on the front porch, shutting the door behind him. “Drusilla left
you?”

“No, you git- Buffy! Buffy left me.”

“Oh,” Xander replied in a shocked voice. He had been the only one that
Spike had confided in about his affair, and it was a surprise that Buffy
would just up and leave. “Why?” he asked in confusion.

“She just…left town. Said that she couldn’t stay and walked out of my
life.”

“Spike, man, I’m sorry,” Xander said sympathetically, patting his shoulder.

Spike fell into the porch swing, dropping his head in his hands. “It’s my
fault,” he muttered. “I just kept pushing and pushing until her only option
was to leave.”

“What?”

Spike looked up, his eyes unusually bright. “Dru wants to have a baby. It
was just the final straw.”

“And you love her? Buffy, I mean.”

“I do,” he whispered.

Xander merely nodded, knowing there was nothing he could say to make any of
this better.

* * * * *

“Is it done?” Drusilla asked later that night, sitting in the darkened corner of the bar.
“Is she gone?”

“Yep,” the man replied, lighting a cigarette.

“How’d you do it?”

“Didn’t need to,” he said, exhaling a puff of smoke. “She left town…on her
own.”

“Really?” Dru asked with a pleased smile. “Well, that makes it a lot easier
now, doesn’t it?”

* * * * *

Buffy knocked on her mother’s door two hours later. Her eyes were bloodshot
and puffy, and she was constantly sniffling. She hadn’t stopped crying
during the entire trip to Los Angeles.

Joyce Summers opened the door and immediately opened her arms to her
daughter. Buffy didn’t hesitate as she ran into them, sobbing as her mother
stroked her hair and offered the comfort that only a mother could provide.

“How are you, sweetheart?” Joyce asked gently.

Buffy pulled back, her chin trembling. “I know you didn’t just ask me
that,” she said, trying to lighten the mood.

Joyce smiled before hugging her daughter to her again. After a few
minutes, Buffy finally pulled away and let her mother lead her into the
house.

“Hi, Buffy.”

She turned and smiled at her sister. “Dawnie? You’re all grown up.”

“And she’s getting her driver’s license next week,” Joyce said, rolling her
eyes.

Buffy offered a slight smile and a wink to her sister before giving her a
hug. “Are you okay?” Dawn whispered.

“I’ve been better,” Buffy said with a sigh as they walked into the living
room.

“How was Spike?” Joyce asked as they sat down.

“Not good,” Buffy replied, shaking her head. “About the same as me.”

Buffy almost regretted introducing Spike to her family. She’d never lied to her mother about their relationship, but she hadn’t expected Joyce to warm up to him the way she had. Considering how Buffy’s father had cheated on her mother for so long, Buffy had expected the lecture to end all lectures, but Joyce had simply told her daughter that she would trust her judgment.

When Buffy had introduced Spike to Joyce on one of her mother’s trips to Sunnydale, Joyce had been so impressed with the adoration that had shown in his eyes toward Buffy, she had offered her support. Buffy had been shocked, to say the least, not only at her mother’s attitude toward her relationship, but also for her reasoning, when Joyce told her how much he obviously cared for Buffy. She had argued with Joyce that their relationship wasn’t about feelings as much as it was about other things, but her mother had merely patted her arm with a smile, saying she knew what she was talking about.

Spike had almost turned into the son she never had, calling Joyce to chat with her, making sure that she and Dawn were getting by, when Hank didn’t bother to send his alimony payments. Now, Buffy was taking that away.

She had called her mother the night before and explained the situation, immediately accepting the offer to come stay with her until school started after Labor Day.

“Do you want anything, Buffy?” Joyce asked. “Tea? Hot chocolate?
Something to eat?”

“I’m fine, Mom. I think I’ll just go lay down for a while. I didn’t get
much rest last night, trying to get packed.”

“Okay,” Joyce said. “Sleep well, honey.”

“Thanks, Mom,” Buffy replied, giving her mother another hug before grabbing
the only bag that she’d bothered to bring inside and heading upstairs.

* * * * *

Buffy was almost asleep when she heard her cell phone ringing. She sighed
as she rolled over, grabbing it from the nightstand where she’d left it and
looking at the caller ID.

‘Spike’

As if she couldn’t have guessed. Buffy took a deep breath, knowing she
shouldn’t answer, but knowing and wanting are two completely different
things.

“Hello, Spike,” she said softly into the phone.

“Are you okay?” his concerned voice floated to her.

“Spike, you shouldn’t be calling me. We need a clean break.”

“I don’t want a clean break, Buffy. I want you.”

“I’m hanging up now,” she said in a gentle tone that let him know it was
the last thing she wanted to do.

“No! Please don’t, luv. I…I just wanted to make sure you got to your mum’s
and you were okay.”

“I’m fine,” she whispered.

Spike stayed silent for a moment, as if debating with himself whether he was
going to ask her something. “Buffy…is there someone else?”

“Spike-“

“I won’t be mad,” he said in a tone that nearly broke her heart all over
again. “I realize it wasn’t fair to you…the situation I put you in. Having
to…wonder, all the time, what I was doing.”

“Yeah,” Buffy agreed softly. “But there was no one else. Only the date
with Angel, and you know that didn’t amount to anything.”

“Yeah,” Spike said, shutting his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose as
he tried to fight another round of tears. “I miss you. All those times
where I could have been with you, and I just…”

“I miss you, too.”

“Then come home,” he whispered.

“You know I can’t.”

“No, I don’t. I don’t know. I just want you here, Buffy.”

“I can’t live like that anymore. Please don’t make this harder by asking me
to,” Buffy said, sniffling slightly.

“You’re right,” he murmured. “I was a pillock for so long. I took you for
granted, and I never should have.”

“I should go,” Buffy said softly.

“When can I see you again?”

“I don’t know,” Buffy said, swallowing the lump in her throat. “I don’t
think that’s such a good idea.”

“Please, Buffy,” he whispered.

“I’ll think about it.”

“Thank you,” Spike whispered, feeling relieved at just those simple words.
“Buffy…I’m willing to give you the space you need. I won’t come after you…unless you want me to.”

“Thanks,” Buffy said with a soft smile. She was moderately surprised that he wasn’t waiting for her in L.A. when she arrived, and she was relieved that he was respecting her.

“Buffy?”

“Yes?”

“I do love you.”

“I know,” Buffy whispered. “Good night.”

“Good night, baby.”

As both phones were turned off, two people in different cities
simultaneously began crying, feeling better and worse at the same time.

Chapter 11 – Choices


Buffy was miserable. She knew she would be, but she didn’t expect to still feel like she was dying. It had been a month of solid torture, and Buffy was now moving her belongings into the house she’d found in Sunnydale.

Spike had begged her to meet him through voicemail everyday for over a week, but Buffy stayed strong. She had only talked to him one other time, and the agony in his voice nearly had her rushing home. However, she’d done a lot of soul searching and found the strength within herself to live without him, if she had to. She didn’t like being in a position that she would have to come to that decision, but she wanted to be happy and this was the first logical step toward that goal.

Spike didn’t know that she would be moving back today, but school started in a
few days, so Buffy fully expected to be seeing him at some point.

* * * * *

Buffy was preparing her classroom on the first day of school when she heard
a soft knock at the door. She felt her heart jump into her throat and her
breath catch, wondering if it was Spike. It was still two hours before the
children would arrive, and Buffy didn’t know if she could handle it.

“Hello?”

Buffy turned around at the strange voice and came face to face with a
handsome dark-haired man.

“Can I help you?”

“Oh, yeah,” he replied with a smile, speaking with a slight Midwestern
accent. “I’m Lindsey McDonald, I’m the new Phys. Ed. teacher.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Buffy said with a smile and a shake of her head. “I didn’t
know the position was filled, I’ve been out of town. I’m Buffy Summers,”
she finished, offering her hand.

Buffy was surprised when he kissed her hand instead of shaking it but
quickly put a smile on her face.

“That’s alright, Miss Summers,” Lindsey replied. “I’ve been learning the
ropes for about a week, and your name keeps popping up in every conversation
I’ve had.”

”Oh really?” Buffy asked with a smile.

“Yeah,” Lindsey said, looking sheepish. “It seems all of the teachers here
think we’d be perfect for each other.”

Buffy flushed, looking down at the ground.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to embarrass you.”

“No, it’s fine,” Buffy replied, shaking her head.

“Well, that’s not actually why I came by. I just wanted to meet you. Put
the name to the face.”

“It was nice meeting you, Mr. McDonald.”

“It’s Lindsey.”

“Okay, Lindsey, then that means I’m Buffy.”

Lindsey turned to walk through the door but paused before leaving her room.

“Would you like to have lunch with me today?” he asked, turning around to
face her again.

“Um…I-I don’t think that’s such a-“

“Just as friends.”

“Okay,” Buffy said with a smile. “I’d like that.”

“Great,” Lindsey replied with a smile. “I’ll see you later.”

Buffy sighed as he left the room. She hated these awkward conversations
with men. She was never any good at it, and it just made her miss Spike more
than ever.

* * * * *

Buffy tried to be as energetic as possible during recess. She saw Lindsey
wave at her from the other side of the playground while keeping an eye on
his own class, and she forced a smile on her face as she returned the wave.
He really was a nice guy, and lunch had been filled with pleasant small talk,
but Buffy didn’t feel ready to begin dating so soon.

“Miss Summers?”

Buffy turned and knelt down to face one of her students.

“Yes, Bobby?”

“That man over there wants to talk to you.”

Buffy followed the direction the little boy was pointing in and felt as if
all the air had been knocked out of her. Spike stood on the other side of
the fence, looking very much like he did when she first saw him back in
January. The leather duster was gone, of course, due to the hot weather,
but he was there all the same.

With a shaky breath, Buffy stood, wiping her hands on her black pants and
nervously straightening her white silk shirt as she approached the fence,
worrying her bottom lip as she walked.

“Hello, Buffy,” he said softly as she approached.

“What are you doing here, Spike?” Buffy asked quietly.

“I had to see you,” he whispered, looking heartbroken.

“You shouldn’t be here.”

“I’m keeping my distance, luv,” he said with a wry smile, gesturing to the
fence that separated them.

“I haven’t changed my mind.”

“No…I didn’t expect you would,” Spike paused as he looked at the ground
before raising his watery eyes to hers. “I miss you, Buffy.”

“Spike, you can’t keep doing this,” Buffy said in a choked voice. “You need
to…you need to get over me.” Buffy felt like she was ripping out her own
heart as she said the words.

“Can we talk?” he asked, trying to keep from begging. “Some place private.”

“Spike, I’m working,” Buffy said, glancing around the playground.

“Not now…tonight. Will you do that for me, Buffy? Will you meet me
tonight?”

Buffy sighed, knowing her answer and hating herself for her weakness.
“Where?” she whispered.

Relief washed over Spike’s features as a brief smile came to his lips. “How
about your old place?”

“No,” Buffy said, shaking her head before he even finished speaking.
“Some place public.”

Spike looked down in thought for a moment before raising his eyes. “The
park?”

“Okay,” Buffy whispered. “I’ll meet you at eight.”

“Thank you,” he whispered before slowly turning away.

“And Spike?” Buffy waited until he turned around again. “We can’t keep
doing this. Tonight…it has to be good-bye.”

* * * * *

Buffy decided to walk to the park, needing the extra time to clear her head.
She looked down at her clothes, still unsure about what she was wearing.
What are you supposed to wear to meet your married ex-lover?

She had finally decided on a pair of jeans and a sleeveless black shirt with
her long hair pulled back in a ponytail. Buffy walked slowly through the
park, hugging her arms around her body against the chill that was creeping
through her in spite of the warm weather.

Buffy could see Spike in the distance as he paced, tapping an unlit
cigarette against his open palm, the last rays of the setting sun casting
him in a golden glow.

“Trying to quit?” Buffy asked, coming up behind him and offering a small
smile when he whirled around to face her.

“Uh…yeah,” he replied, gazing into her eyes. He tossed the cigarette to the
ground before slowly walking toward her. “How’ve you been?” he asked in a
soft tone.

Buffy broke their eye contact, looking down at the ground as she scuffed the
toe of her boot into the dirt. “I’ve been okay,” she whispered, avoiding
his eyes. “What about you?”

“Without you? Miserable.”

Buffy brought her eyes up to his, seeing that they were shimmering with
tears. Spike took a deep, shaky breath as he took another step toward her.
“How can I fix this, Buffy?” he asked in a pleading voice.

“Spike, you can’t,” Buffy said, shaking her head as she battled her own
tears. “You’re married. I should have ended this when I found out and not
dragged it on for months. This can never work. You’re starting a family
with your wife, and I just…I just can’t do it anymore.”

“I don’t want to start a family with Dru.”

Buffy’s mouth dropped open slightly as she stared at him. “So you’re
leaving her?” she asked in disbelief.

Spike took a shuddering breath as he walked over to sit on a nearby bench, dropping his head into his hands. “I just know I want to be with you,” he replied in a choked voice before slowly raising his tear-filled eyes to hers. “Tell me what to do,” he practically pleaded with her, silently begging Buffy to ask him to leave his wife. Buffy knew it. Spike knew it. But she wouldn’t ask that of him. Buffy had come to terms with possibly being a part of the destruction of a marriage, but she wouldn’t ask him to leave. A month ago she might have, but now he needed to make that decision on his own.

“You only wanted me because I was there, Spike…because I was available,” Buffy replied with a sigh.

“That’s not true,” Spike said, standing and walking toward her.

Buffy inhaled sharply when she felt his muscular arms go around her waist,
pulling her against him, before she looked into his eyes. “So you’re
telling me you’d divorce Drusilla if I wanted you to?”

“Is that what you want?”

Buffy saw the worry and something that could be identified as hope etched onto his face and felt her heart break a little more. “I want to be happy,” she whispered as a tear slid down her cheek.

Spike couldn’t resist any longer. His mouth covered hers in desperate need
as Buffy’s lips parted. Both moaned at the feeling of being together again
before Buffy slowly began to pull away.

Spike pulled back to look into her eyes, letting his hand trail over her
cheek before settling on the back of her neck, attempting to bring her back
for another kiss. Buffy looked down before their lips could meet, causing
Spike to lean back and stare at her. “I can make you happy, Buffy.”

“You could,” Buffy agreed with a slight nod. “But you don’t even know if
you want me.”

“I do, I-“

“Spike, I love you. I will always love you, but I just can’t go on like
this.”

Spike took a deep breath, preparing to come to terms with everything that had transpired since he met the woman he was in love with. Preparing to tell Buffy what he had realized in the month that she’d been away. “Buffy-“

“I’ve met somebody,” Buffy lied, interrupting what Spike was about to say. She averted her eyes and preparing for the explosion. “I-I needed to move on, and I…”

“Who is it?” Spike asked, clenching his jaw.

“Nobody you know,” Buffy whispered.

“Kiss me.”

“What?” she asked, looking up at him.

Buffy’s eyes widened before squeezing them shut as Spike’s mouth assaulted
hers. Their tongues seemed to do battle as his hands went to her arms,
holding her in place as his tongue swept over her lower lip.

Breaking away after a few moments, Spike stared into her eyes. “I know you
still feel it,” he said, breathing heavily. “You said it yourself, you’re
still in love with me. You’ll always love me. You don’t want to be with
anybody else.”

Buffy closed her eyes, letting the tears slide down her cheeks as she bit
her lip. “Why can’t you just let me go?” she whispered. “Why do you have
to keep hurting me?”

“How am I hurting you?” Spike asked, partly in concern and partly in anger
as he tilted her head up. Buffy backed away as she prepared to leave.

“You won’t choose me.”

* * * * *

“So that was him?”

“What?” Buffy asked, turning around, her arms laden with building blocks
and seeing Lindsey standing behind her.

“The guy on the playground yesterday,” he clarified, gesturing to the
window. “I didn’t get a good look at him, but I’m guessing he was your ex. The reason you’re not ready to date
yet.”

“How did…what makes you say that?”

“Just a guess,” he replied with a shrug, walking into the classroom and
helping Buffy pick up the toys, tossing them into the nearby bins. “The way
you talked to him. I guess the body language sums it up.”

“Body language?”

“Yeah,” he said, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms. “It just
seemed like you two were more than friends.”

“’Were’ being the key word in that sentence,” Buffy said, avoiding his eyes
as she continued picking up the room.

“So…you’re not seeing anyone?”

“Um…no…not right now.”

“Well, I was kind of hoping maybe I could take you out sometime.”

“Lindsey-“

“I know, I know,” Lindsey replied, holding up his hands in mock surrender.
“You’re not looking for a serious relationship, but neither am I.”

“I’m not looking for a sleepover buddy, either.”

Lindsey laughed at her comment, shaking his head. “I just thought we could
go out and relax. Nothing wrong with that, is there?”

“I guess not,” Buffy murmured.

“Great,” he said with a smile. “How about Friday night at seven?”

“It’s a date.”

Chapter 12 – Date Night


Friday arrived faster than Buffy expected. She glanced at the clock while
smoothing her cream-colored skirt. Turning to look in the mirror, she
inspected the navy silk, sleeveless top she had chosen and quickly fluffed
her hair when she heard a knock on the door. With some trepidation, she
walked toward it, taking a deep breath as she pulled it open.

“Wow,” Lindsey greeted her with a smile. “You look stunning.”

Buffy blushed nervously and offered him a smile as she pulled the door shut
behind her. “You don’t look so bad yourself.”

The compliment was true, but even Buffy felt it was a little forced as he
guided her to his truck.

“I was thinking of the standard ‘dinner and a movie.’

“Sounds great,” Buffy said with as much enthusiasm as she could muster.

* * * * *

Dinner had gone better than expected. Buffy felt comfortable around Lindsey,
and he did his best to keep her at ease, cracking jokes and giving her that
lazy smile that seemed to make her want to smile as well.

“Are you about ready?” Lindsey asked, glancing at his watch. “We still have
a little time, if you want to wait.”

“No, it’s fine,” Buffy said with a smile as they stood up.

She hesitated when Lindsey offered her his arm, but she knew she couldn’t
refuse. It just felt unnatural to be in such close proximity with another
man.

‘Is this how Spike feels with Drusilla?’ a little voice in her head
wondered. ‘Don’t be silly, Buffy,’ she chastised herself. ‘They were
together long before you entered the picture- he’s probably more comfortable
around her than he ever was around you.’

Buffy smiled as Lindsey held the door open for her, only to swallow a gasp
when she narrowly avoided crashing into the object of her thoughts. She
watched as Spike backed up to give her room to leave the restaurant. Their
eyes met for a long moment before Buffy realized he was there with his
wife, who was calmly looking her up and down with slightly narrowed eyes.

Lindsey came up behind her, letting his hand rest on the small of her back-
a move that did not go unnoticed by Spike.

“Hello, Buffy,” Spike said calmly, causing Buffy’s eyes to widen.

“You two know each other?” Drusilla asked with mock innocence.

“Buffy was Jessica’s kindergarten teacher last year,” Spike said to his
wife. “Buffy Summers, meet my wife Drusilla.”

Spike gave her an apologetic look as Dru reached out to shake her hand,
though it almost looked like she wanted Buffy to kiss it instead. Buffy
looked at it with apprehension before slowly reaching forward and shaking
it. She felt her skin crawl at being so close to this woman, pulling away
from her as quickly as possible.

“It’s a pleasure,” Drusilla said in her upper class accent.

Spike raised an eyebrow at Buffy, looking from her to the man next to her,
causing Buffy to return to the present. “I’m sorry, this is Lindsey
McDonald. Lindsey, this is Mr. and Mrs. Atherton.”

Spike watched Buffy carefully as she made the introductions, feeling a stab
of pain go through him at the formality. He knew it was probably
for the best, but it still added to the hurt he was already feeling when he
saw her with another man. He also felt tremendous guilt at the realization
that this was what he had put her through every time he had left her to go
home to his wife.

Lindsey reached forward to shake his hand, and Spike resisted every nerve in
his body that told him to crush each bone he came in contact with. He was
able to control himself, but he couldn’t help but add more pressure than he
needed to.

“Nice to meet you,” Lindsey said, pulling his hand away and wrapping it
around Buffy’s waist. “We better get going,” he said softly, noticing how
pale she was. “We don’t want to be late.”

“Yeah,” she agreed with a slight nod. “It was nice seeing you again,” she
said to Spike, pasting a fake smile on her face as he gave her a nod.

“Yeah,” he said softly, swallowing the lump in his throat. “You, too.”

Spike opened the door for his wife, but his eyes never left the blonde as
she was led to a truck that was parked a few yards away. He blinked back the
tears in his eyes, trying his best to be strong as he followed Drusilla
into the restaurant.

“The school teacher seemed a little on edge,” Drusilla commented as they
were looking through their menus a few minutes later.

Spike raised his eyes from his own menu and studied his wife. She wasn’t
looking at him, but he knew she could feel his eyes on her. “I guess,” he
murmured.

“Is she married to that handsome young man?” Dru asked, raising innocent
eyes to her husband.

“No,” he said softly, wishing his drink would get here as he looked around
for their waiter.

“Pity,” Dru commented. “They make a very attractive couple.”

Spike clenched his jaw as he looked at the menu, not really seeing it as his
mind drifted back to Buffy. He glanced up at his wife, paying attention to
the startling differences in the two women. He’d always known they were
there, but now, they seemed more obvious.

Buffy seemed to exude warmth, and Drusilla had always been distant and cold
with him. Rarely letting him in. That was one of the reasons he had been
so easily swayed to cheat on her originally. The other reason being,
the force that seemed to draw him to Buffy in the first place. He couldn’t
seem to stay away from the blonde, and he didn’t want to. He was in love
with Buffy. He knew that, but sitting here across from his wife, it hit him
that he was in love with only her.

“Dru, I think we need to talk.”

* * * * *

Buffy was able to put Spike in the back of her mind for most of the night.
She and Lindsey had enjoyed the movie and were now standing on her front
porch.

Buffy took a deep breath. “Do you want to come in?”

Lindsey gave her a questioning look as she shook her head with a smile. “I
mean for coffee.”

“Coffee would be great,” he said with a smile of his own as he followed
Buffy into the house.

“There’s the living room,” Buffy said, gesturing to the room to their left.
“I’ll just be in the kitchen.”

“Don’t be silly, I’ll help you.”

“No, it’s really-“

“I don’t mind,” Lindsey replied.

Buffy nervously made the coffee, fidgeting with everything she put her hands
on. She was currently tapping her hands on a mug as they waited. Buffy
jumped slightly when she felt strong hands go to her shoulders.

“You’re tense,” Lindsey said softly as he applied pressure to her muscles.
“Relax, I don’t bite.”

Buffy smiled but immediately tensed up when she felt herself being turned
around in his arms. She gasped when his lips met hers but tried to go with
the movements. This wasn’t what she was used to. He wasn’t who she was used to…he wasn’t who she needed him to be, but Buffy tried to forget Spike and enjoy the simple kiss as Lindsey’s hands came up to her hair.

Both jumped at the shrill sound of the telephone ringing. Buffy swallowed
hard as she slowly pulled out of Lindsey’s embrace to grab the cordless.
Looking at the caller ID, Buffy briefly closed her eyes before turning to
face Lindsey.

“Excuse me,” she murmured to him as she walked toward the living room with
the phone.

“I can leave if-“

“It’s okay,” Buffy interrupted, walking into the kitchen. “This won’t take
long.”

Buffy took a deep breath as she leaned against the front door. “Hello.”

“I need to see you.”

“No, you don’t,” Buffy replied, trying to keep the hurt out of her voice.
She missed him so much. That point was made glaringly obvious a few moments ago when she realized no other man would feel right.

“Buffy, look outside.”

“What?”

“Just…please.”

Buffy sighed as she turned around and opened the front door, gasping when
she saw Spike standing on the front porch. Before she knew what was
happening, he grabbed her arm and pulled her through the door and into the
shadows of the porch as he shut the door behind her.

“Spike, you can’t keep doing this,” she whispered, looking around nervously.
“And…how’d you know where I lived?”

“Called your mum,” he explained sheepishly.

“And she just told you?”

“No, she wasn’t home. The Nibblet told me.”

“I’m going to kill her,” Buffy mumbled under her breath, looking down at the
ground and shaking her head.

Spike tilted her chin up. “I just wanted to…”

“What?” she asked softly.

Spike swallowed hard, obviously trying to reign in his temper. “I hope I
didn’t interrupt anything.”

“What are you talking about?”

Spike slowly brought a hand up to wipe away Buffy’s smudged lipstick.

Buffy looked down, feeling something very close to shame, even though it was
ridiculous. “It was just a kiss,” she murmured.

“Is he in there?” Spike asked, looking at the house, trying to keep his jaw
from clenching.

“Yes,” she said quietly.

“I’ll come back.”

“What?”

“I’ll be back in an hour, luv,” he said softly. “I need to talk to you, and
I don’t want it to be rushed because your date is waiting on you.”

“Spike-“

Buffy’s words were cut off as Spike’s lips met hers in a gentle kiss. She
felt her heart race and her cheeks flush at the feel of him against her
body. There would never be anyone who felt this right.

* * * * *

Lindsey wandered around the kitchen as he waited for Buffy to return. He
looked at his cell phone when it began ringing and let out a sigh.

“Yeah.”

“Change of plans.”

“What are you talking about, Drusilla?”

“I have a new task for you.”

Chapter 13 – Making Up


Buffy nervously walked toward the front door an hour later. She was able to
subtly kick Lindsey out with the flimsy excuse that she had a headache, and
now she was beginning to wonder if she should have left also.

Taking a deep breath, Buffy wasn’t sure if she was ready for the pain and
heartache that seemed to be associated with seeing Spike lately.

“Open the door, Buffy,” she murmured to herself as she twisted the knob.

Buffy barely had a chance to step back as Spike practically bolted through
the door, slamming it shut with his heel as he grabbed Buffy and pressed her
against the door. Buffy gasped as his lips came crashing down on hers,
taking her breath from her but not stopping her hands from traveling up to
clasp behind his neck.

Spike’s mouth ravaged hers as he kissed her hungrily, his tongue gently
running along her teeth before brushing against hers.

Buffy gasped again as he pulled back, bringing his hands up to each side of
her face as he tried to catch his breath. Buffy tried to control her own
breathing as she closed her eyes. She could feel her heartbeat skyrocketing
as Spike’s thumbs gently stroked her cheeks.

Spike waited until Buffy opened her eyes and looked at him before pressing
a softer kiss to her lips.

“What was that for?” Buffy asked in confusion.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“Spike-“

“And I’m leaving Drusilla.”

Buffy’s mouth dropped open as she stared at him in shock. “You’re leaving
her?” she whispered, not wanting to believe it. Not wanting to get her
hopes up, only to have them all come crashing down again.

“I have to be with you, Buffy. I love you.”

“And this-“

“I’ve changed, Buffy,” Spike continued, looking at her through hopeful eyes.

“You’re sure about that?” Buffy asked, praying what he was saying was true.

“I’ve never been more sure of anything, than I am of being here with you.”

Buffy didn’t even think as she spun them around until she was pushing Spike
into the door, crushing her mouth against his as his hands slid under her
shirt, running up the smooth expanse of her back.

Buffy pulled back, panting, as she stared into his eyes. They were darkened
with desire, looking almost navy, as she pulled him to the couch before
turning around with a smirk and pushing him onto the soft cushions.

Spike leaned forward, lifting her shirt slightly, to kiss along the flat
muscles of her stomach before running his hands along her thighs and giving
them a light tug. Buffy squealed as she found herself sitting on Spike’s
lap, smiling against his lips as he gave her a soft kiss.

Buffy’s hands ran through his hair, dislodging the curls from the gel that
was holding them in place, as their tongues tangled. Buffy moaned into his
mouth as Spike’s arms wrapped around her body, pulling her closer against
him. Spike broke away from her lips with a gasp as he felt Buffy’s hips
grind into his. He tilted his head, staring at her, and smiled when he saw
the mischievous grin on her lips.

“Tell me.”

“Tell you what?” Buffy teased, innocently biting her bottom lip as he
narrowed his eyes, watching her.

“You know what,” he replied, letting his hands slide up her thighs, reaching
around to lightly squeeze her butt.

Buffy giggled, squirming around on his lap until he moaned with desire. She
slowly leaned forward, lightly running her tongue along the edge of his ear
before gently biting the lobe. “Say pretty please,” she whispered with a
smile.

“Buffy…“ he replied in a warning tone.

Buffy giggled again as she pulled back to look into his eyes, seeing the
humor in them, as she stuck out her bottom lip in a pout.

“Please,” he whispered, not sounding at all genuine.

Buffy puffed her lip out even more, backing away as Spike tried to catch it
between his teeth.

With a heavy sigh, Spike glared at her as she fought a grin. “Pretty
please,” he grumbled. “Fine, are you happy now?”

Buffy didn’t respond as she tenderly ran a hand over his cheekbone, never
breaking eye contact. “Yes,” she whispered. “I’m very happy now.” Spike
watched as she leaned forward, brushing feather-light kisses along his neck,
all the way up to his ear. “I love you, Spike.”

Spike grasped her hips, pulling her forward as their lips met again. Buffy
moaned, the playful mood evaporating as she pushed her body against his.

“I need you,” she whispered, unbuttoning his shirt as his hands slid up her
shirt, brushing lightly over her breasts as she arched her back, craving
more contact. Spike stripped her of her shirt and bra as Buffy scraped her
fingernails over his exposed muscles, smiling when they tensed under her
fingers.

Spike watched as Buffy met his eyes, slowly running her hands lower until
she unhurriedly unzipped his pants, pulling him free of the confining
material. Spike swept her thong aside, letting his fingers lightly brush
over her as she positioned herself above him. Never breaking eye contact,
Buffy lowered herself onto him, gasping as he filled her.

“Buffy-“

“Shhh,” she whispered, moving her hips against his as bolts of pleasure shot
through her body. “I already know.”

Spike lifted himself off the couch, causing a cry to erupt from Buffy as he
hit the elusive spot inside of her. Buffy arched her back, getting almost
as much pleasure from the feel of Spike holding her firmly in his arms as
they moved together.

Feeling the tightening in her stomach, Buffy sped up her thrusts as Spike
began moving more rapidly, letting his hands slip to her waist as she moved
up and down on him. He could feel her muscles begin to squeeze him in
preparation of her impending orgasm as her breath came out in gasps.

Spike buried his head in her neck seconds before she lost control,
screaming out his name in ecstasy.

Her climax triggered his as he practically exploded, almost painfully,
inside of her, holding on to her in an iron grip as he slowly came back
down to earth. “I love you,” he whispered, kissing her naked shoulder.

Buffy tried to calm her breathing as she ran her fingers through his hair.
“I know.”

* * * * *

Lindsey sat down at the table in the darkened corner of the bar, watching
the brunette as she calmly lit a cigarette before raising her eyes to his.
“You said you had some work for me.”

“That I do, my dear boy,” Drusilla replied.

“Look, if you want her out of town, it’s not going to happen. She loved
that job, and there’s no way she’s leaving those kids. As for anything
illegal that you may want me to do, forget it. I just got a good job, and
I’m not about to risk it just to be sent to prison.”

“It’s not illegal,” Drusilla reassured him with a smile. “Just a little immoral.”

“Okay…what is it?”

* * * * *

Two hours later, the naked couple lay in her bed with their bodies
comfortably intertwined with each other. Buffy sighed, her back pressed
against his muscular chest, Spike’s fingers interlaced with hers as they
both stared at their joined hands, bathed in the moonlight.

“I missed you, so much,” Spike whispered, lightly brushing kisses over her
skin.

“I missed you, too,” she said softly, tears shimmering in her eyes at the
happiness she was feeling. “But I had to go.”

“I know. I understand.”

Chapter 14 – Gifts


Buffy rolled over in her bed, mildly surprised when she collided with a bare
chest.

It had been a week since Spike had announced he was leaving his wife, and he
was practically living at Buffy’s. Spike hadn’t heard a word from Drusilla,
much to their surprise, and he and Buffy had settled into a comfortable
routine.

Now, as Buffy entered the first stages of waking, she stretched, trying to
work the aches and pains out of her body. They were, not surprisingly, as a
result of another marathon with Spike. She felt an aching sensation running
through her muscles as she slowly opened her eyes and was met with the
brilliant blue of Spike’s as he lay next to her, studying her with a serious
expression.

“What’s wrong, luv?” he asked, pulling her closer to him,

“You gave me a workout last night,” Buffy said in a soft voice, snuggling closer to him. Before glancing at the clock, seeing she was already running late. “Great,” she muttered. “I’m going to be running late.”

“You sure that’s all that’s wrong?” he asked softly as he checked her forehead.

“Positive,” Buffy said. “Just a little rundown I guess.”

“Maybe you’re pregnant.”

Buffy turned to face him, raising an eyebrow. “Why do you sound happy about that?”

Spike shrugged. “Having a baby wouldn’t be such a bad thing,” he whispered, brushing a kiss along her shoulder. “As long as it was with you.”

Buffy smiled. “Don’t get your hopes up. I’m not pregnant, just tired.”

“I’ve got to go to L.A. this afternoon,” Spike reminded her of his business
trip. “Maybe I should postpone it,” he said softly as he checked her
forehead again.

“No, Spike,” Buffy replied. “I’m not an invalid, I’ll be fine. Besides,
you’ll be back tomorrow, and I’ll either be better or worse.”

“I’m not seeing much of an upside to it if you’re worse, pet,” Spike said
with a raised eyebrow.

“Well,” Buffy started, sitting up as she slowly got out of bed. “If I’m
better…”

She paused, turning to look at him with a raised eyebrow, biting her bottom
lip as she smiled at him, letting the unspoken statement hang in the air
before turning toward the bathroom. “And if I’m worse, I’ll have my
wonderful boyfriend to take care of me,” she called as she left the room.

Spike chuckled, waiting until he heard the shower turn on before getting out
of bed and quietly sneaking into the bathroom. Slipping into the
shower behind her, Buffy gasped when she felt his hands on her body.

“What are you doing?”

“Starting the morning the way I always want to,” Spike replied in a husky
whisper as he left soft kisses on her damp skin.

“Spike,” Buffy moaned. “I’m already running late.”

Spike smiled against her skin when her words contradicted her actions as she
pushed herself against him. He let his arms band around her waist,
positioning himself at her entrance as Buffy braced herself against the wall
of the shower, expecting Spike to slam into her, but was surprised when he
slid into her with aching slowness.

“God, I love you,” he moaned when he was fully sheathed inside her,
gripping her hips to keep from moving too much until the sensations weren’t
as overwhelming.

Buffy moaned at the feel of him as she stood up a little straighter,
pressing her back against his chest, only fueling Spike’s desire even more
when he felt her damp skin. Wrapping an arm around her waist, he pulled her
closer to him as they slowly began to move together, in a steady rhythm.

Buffy could feel the muscles in his chest, pressed hard against her back as
he slowly pulled out, only to push back in at an achingly slow pace. She
frantically pushed against him, breathing a sigh of relief when his pace
began to speed up, thrusting in and out of her. Buffy gasped when she felt
his teeth graze over her shoulder, the unexpected feeling sending her over
the edge.

Spike closed his eyes as her fluttering inner muscles clamped down on his
shaft as he pushed as far into her as he could go, letting his own body
shake with his climax.

The world seemed to slowly come back to them. The sound of the shower as
the water hit the tiles and slid along their bodies, the two of them gasping
for air as Spike held her to his chest before slowly pulling out of her.

Buffy felt the aching return to her muscles as she turned around in his
arms, snuggling deeper into his chest as he held onto her.

“You’re probably going to get sick now,” she whispered.

“It was worth it,” he said with a smile, pulling her closer.

* * * * *

Buffy sat at one of the picnic tables in the middle of the recess area, her
head propped up on one hand while keeping an eye on her class as they
laughed and ran around the grassy area. She turned when she felt someone’s
eyes on her and smiled when she saw Lindsey. He had been surprisingly
gracious when she told him she wouldn’t be able to see him anymore, and
they’d made an effort to work on a tentative friendship.

“How’s your day?” Lindsey asked, sitting next to her.

Buffy nodded her head tiredly as an answer.

“You feeling okay?” he asked, looking at her in concern.

“Just a little under the weather, I guess.”

“I figured,” Lindsey replied. “You’re usually more active than the kids,”
he finished with a smile.

“Yeah,” Buffy said, watching her students running around and giggling. “I
don’t know, I’m sure I’ll be fine. I probably just need some more rest.”

Lindsey seemed to be nervous about something as they sat in silence. “Is something wrong, Lindsey?”

He hesitated for a moment. “No,” he finally said, shaking his head as he seemed to be having an inner debate with himself. “No, it’s nothing.”

Buffy watched as he got up and walked away, her brow furrowed in confusion before she turned her attention back to her class.

* * * * *

Spike was already running late for his trip as he grabbed some papers off
his desk and hurriedly shoved them in his briefcase. Taking a last look
around his office, he nodded to himself that he was ready before pulling
open the door.

His eyes widened slightly before narrowing. “Drusilla,” he greeted in an
even tone.

“Hello, my Spike,” she cooed.

“I’m not yours anymore.”

“Oh yes…you belong with Sunshine now.”

Spike raised an eyebrow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Drusilla pushed by him, walking over to his desk with a manila envelope
that she unceremoniously dropped onto the surface.

“What’s this?” Spike asked, picking it up.

“A little gift.”

“I didn’t know we give gifts in celebration of divorce,” Spike said wryly.
“Although, it might make sense.”

“Open it.”

Spike looked at her skeptically before tearing open the envelope and
removing the glossy photographs inside. Masking his surprise at the 8 x 10
pictures of him and Buffy in compromising positions on the beach outside her
old apartment, Spike tossed them down on the desk and looked at a woman he
once thought he was in love with.

“Good for you, ducks,” he said in a bored tone, bracing his hands against
the surface. “I was wondering if you’d ever figure it out. It’s a little
bit clichéd, isn’t it, pet? You showing up at my office with a stack of
photographs. I would have expected more from you.”

For Drusilla’s part, she didn’t even flinch. “Look harder.”

Spike frowned, flipping through the stack until he came to several pictures of him and Buffy on her desk at school that were taken two days ago when Spike had surprised her after work.

“What the hell is this?” Spike asked, giving her a hard look.

“Do you think the schoolboard would enjoy one of their teachers holding such
little regard for her job?”

“What the hell do you want, Dru?” Spike growled.

“What do you think?”

Chapter 15 – Emotions


“Buffy!” Spike yelled, walking into her house, slamming the door behind him.
“Buffy, are you here?”

Buffy came racing down the stairs, concerned that Spike was even there.
“You’re supposed to be in Los Angeles,” she said as he pulled her to him
for a crushing hug. “What’s wrong?” Buffy waited for a moment before
asking again when Spike didn’t say anything. “Spike, what’s going on?”

“There’s a problem,” he muttered quietly.

“Wh-what kind of problem?”

Spike pulled out the pictures, handing them over to her. Buffy took the
photographs and flipped through them, her expression finally turning to a
look of horror when she got to the last few. “How…who?”

“Drusilla.”

Buffy’s face paled as she looked up at Spike. “What’s she going to do?”

“Well, if she doesn’t get what she wants, she’s threatening to send them to
the schoolboard and have you suspended.”

“What does she want?” Buffy asked quietly, afraid of the answer.

“Me,” Spike said simply.

“No,” Buffy said, shaking her head. “I won’t let you. I can’t let you do
that for something like this.”

“Buffy, this is your career.”

“You think that matters to me? I don’t want it if I have to lose you.”

“It’s not just that, luv. What about your reputation?”

“I don’t care!” she cried.

“I do,” he said quietly.

Buffy felt numb as shock seemed to settle into every muscle of her body.
“You’re going back to her.”

Spike didn’t answer, knowing she wasn’t asking.

“You bastard,” she whispered, shaking her head as she backed away, toward the
stairs. “This whole time…this whole time you were never planning on
staying. You were just using me for a little break from your normal life.”

“Buffy, of course I was planning on staying. I just can’t let these
pictures destroy everything you’ve tried to make of yourself.”

“No…why let that happen when you do such a damn fine job of it yourself?”

“Buffy-“

“Don’t,” she replied, turning and running up the stairs.

Spike clenched his jaw before following her, walking to the end of the
hallway, turning the doorknob of their bedroom. Locked.

“Buffy,” he called, knocking on the door.

“Just go,” Buffy cried as she buried her face in a pillow, letting her
tears fall freely. She should have known that it would never last. That it
was too good to be true. It always was.

“Buffy, open the soddin’ door before I break it down.”

“No!”

Buffy jumped when the sound of wood splintering filled the room. She sat up
straight, staring in shock as the door swung open, pieces of wood flying
away from the frame. Spike angrily stepped through the doorway as he made his way toward her bed, pulling her up by her arms and brutally crushing his lips to hers.

Pulling away after a moment, Spike looked deep into her eyes, trying to make
her understand what he was going through. “I love you.”

“Then don’t do this,” she whispered. “All I want is you…I don’t care about
anything else.”

“I’ll just move back for a little while,” he said softly. “I’ll find the
negatives and then I’ll come home.”

Buffy felt her heart breaking as she shook her head. “And you don’t think
she’s thought of that little possibility? She’s not going to just leave
them out in the open for you to find and destroy.”

“Buffy-“

“I’m not doing this again, Spike. I’m not going to be the other woman. If
you leave, then I can’t be with you.”

“I’m doing this for you!”

“No, you’re not!” Buffy yelled back. “You’re doing this for you! Just like
you’ve done everything else! Just admit it, Spike…you don’t want me. I’m
not the long-haul girl, I’m just the little plaything on the side.”

Spike’s hold on her arms tightened as she spoke. “Do you honestly believe
that?” he asked in a deceivingly quiet voice.

‘No,’ Buffy thought. ‘I really don’t.’

“Does it matter what I think?” she asked. “Does it matter what I want?”

“It won’t take long,” he whispered, brushing his lips over her forehead.
“I’ll be in and out before you know it.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“And you think that’s not what she’s planning? To get you to move back into
that house? Into her bed?”

“I won’t.”

“But how will you stop her, Spike?” Buffy asked sarcastically. “After all,
if you moved back in with a woman you wanted to divorce, then obviously the
next logical step is to sleep with her, since she is your wife, after all.”

“How can you accuse me of that?”

“Because that was my life!” Buffy yelled. “That was my life for more than
half a year and that’s why I fucking left you!” She broke down in sobs,
nearly crumpling to the floor as Spike caught her. “I can’t live like that
again,” she whispered as Spike sat down on the bed with her on his lap,
pulling her closer to him. “I felt like it was killing me when you had to
leave me, and now you’re telling me that you’re doing it again. I told you I
couldn’t live like that, Spike, and I meant it…I meant it,” she repeated as she sobbed into his chest.

Spike felt his body tense with hatred toward his wife. The woman he loved
was sobbing in his arms, and he only had two options- neither of which looked
very appealing.

“I won’t do anything with her, Buffy. I promise.”

“What if it was me, Spike?” she asked softly.

“What, luv?”

“If I wanted to save your career by going to live with another man…another
man who I had a relationship with…how would you feel?”

Buffy didn’t need an answer, she could feel Spike’s muscles tense when she
mentioned it.

“I’ll go talk to her tomorrow.”

“Talk?” she whispered, her voice full of hope.

Spike gently brushed his lips against hers. “Talk,” he reaffirmed. “That’s
all…I promise.”

Buffy wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to her as she
held on. “Thank you,” she whispered.

Chapter 16 – Closure


Spike knocked on the door of the mansion, not wanting to use his key since
he didn’t consider it his home. Wesley answered, surprised when he saw his
boss standing on the other side.

“Mr. Atherton. It’s so good to see you home, sir.”

“I’m not home, Wes,” Spike replied, walking into the foyer and looking at
the cold surroundings. “Is Drusilla here?”

“I believe she’s in the bedroom, sir.”

“Thanks, Wes.”

Spike turned, feeling as if he was walking in slow motion as he made his way
toward the bedroom. Taking a deep breath, he raised a fist to the door a
second before it opened.

“My Spike,” she cooed in a voice that was really grating on Spike’s nerves.

“I’m not yours,” he said in a cold tone.

“Only because that little slut took you away from me.”

It took every ounce of willpower that Spike possessed not to hit the woman
in front of him. “Don’t you ever talk about her that way,” he said, taking
a menacing step closer to her.

His imposing stance did nothing to the look in Drusilla’s eyes.

‘That’s the one and only thing that she and Buffy have in common,’ Spike
thought. ‘They both know how to stand up to me.’

“I’m so glad you’ve come home to be with your princess.”

“I haven’t come home, and if I did, it sure as hell wouldn’t be for you.
This isn’t my home, Dru. My home is with Buffy…it has been for a long
time.”

“That’s not true, Spike,” she said softly, swaying in front of him.

‘How did I put up with this for so long? I’ve known that she was a psycho, but I just ignored it.’

“You always come back to my bed,” Drusilla continued. “I’ve always been
first in your life.”

“No, you haven’t,” Spike growled. “You were just someone I settled on. You
made me think that I was in love with you so we could get married and you
would have an ‘in’ with all the rich people you wanted.”

Spike was mildly surprised when she did nothing to deny this. He was mildly
hurt that his marriage was for nothing until he looked into the future and
saw Buffy’s smiling face.

“It worked out well for both of us,” Drusilla said with an uncaring
expression.

“Until I met the woman I was meant to be with.”

“So you’re not staying?” she asked in a tone that implied she’d known that
he wouldn’t from the beginning.

“No. I want the photographs and the negatives. NOW!”

Drusilla began cackling as she looked at her husband. “You really thought
it would be that easy? That you could just walk in and demand something
without any type of payment?”

“You want money?” Spike asked. “Take it. Take everything. The house, the
cars, the country club membership- I don’t give a damn about any of it. I
have what I want. I have the only thing I need.”

“Yes, your one true love,” Dru said sardonically. “But I don’t want money,
precious William.”

“What do you want?” Spike growled.

“You. Once more, for old times sake. You do this for me, and I will give
you every copy of every picture and their negatives. No one will ever have
to know, and you can go back to your new little toy, knowing that she’s safe
from any scandals.”

* * * * *

Buffy sat at her desk, nervously chewing on her thumbnail. School had been
over for twenty minutes and she was so nervous, she didn’t want to go home.
She looked up with hope in her eyes when she heard a knock on the door. Her
heart fell when she saw Lindsey standing there instead of Spike.

“I thought I’d come and check on you. Are you okay?”

“I’ve been better,” Buffy murmured, drumming her nails along the surface of
the desk in aggravation.

“What’s wrong?” Lindsey asked, sitting on the edge of her desk as Buffy
worried her bottom lip between her teeth. “Is it your boyfriend?”

Buffy raised her eyes to his, slightly surprised at the question. “I never
told you I was seeing anybody.”

“I know,” Lindsey replied in quiet voice as he avoided her eyes.

“Lindsey-“

“Buffy, I have something that I need to tell you.”

Buffy looked at him with uncertainty clouding her features. “What is it?”

Lindsey sighed, reaching into his back pocket and extracting a small
envelope from his back pocket. “I think these belong to you.”

Buffy took the envelope, looking at is skeptically for a moment before
opening it. She pulled out several strips of negatives, becoming even more
confused as she held them up to the light. Her mouth dropped open as her
eyes widened, seeing the pictures that Spike had brought home the day
before.

“Where did you get these?”

Lindsey stood up, shoving his hands in his pockets as he began to pace
around the room. “I took them.”

“Took them as in ‘stole them’ or took them as in-“

“I photographed you.”

Buffy felt her mouth go dry as her stomach clenched. “Some of these
pictures were taken on the beach…months before I even met you.”

“I know,” Lindsey muttered. “Drusilla hired me to spy on her husband…that’s
what I came up with.”

Buffy looked at him with absolute shock on her features. “How could you do
this?”

“It was a job, Buffy,” he tried to explain. “I was hired to see what he was
doing and then to take you out of the picture.”

Buffy was out of her seat and backing away from him in less than a second.
“If you say you were hired to kill me, I swear-“

“No!” Lindsey cried, shaking his head. “I was supposed to get you away from
Spike. Start dating you and make you forget about him. But I made a
mistake.”

“What mistake?” Buffy asked skeptically.

“I got to know you. I couldn’t do that to someone like you-“

“Oh!” Buffy said sarcastically. “So you actually started seeing me as a
real person and decided to do the right thing? I feel so honored!”

“Something like that,” he muttered. “I also got to know Drusilla and
realized what a crazy bitch she really is…that’s where the pictures from the
school came from. She wanted me to take something that could ruin you. I
only gave her one set of pictures. Buffy, she’s planning on using them
no matter what. Whether she gets what she wants or not, they’re
going to get out.”

Buffy’s eyes narrowed as she looked at the man in front of her. “I need a
ride to the mansion,” she said, shoving the negatives in her pocket. “I
figure that’s the least you could do, considering what you’ve done.”

“You’re right. Let’s go.”

* * * * *

As Lindsey pulled up in front of the Atherton mansion, he barely had a
chance to stop the car before Buffy jumped out. He hurried after her as she
banged on the door, pushing past the butler as he opened it.

“Where is she?” Buffy asked.

“Who are you?”

“I’m the woman that’s getting screwed over by your boss, now where is she?”
Buffy asked more forcefully.

Wesley didn’t have a chance to answer as they heard a noise on the stairs.
Buffy gasped when she saw Spike, running up to meet him and throwing herself
into his arms as Wesley left the room, giving them some privacy.

“Buffy, what are you doing here?”

Buffy pulled back to look at him, her eyes widening when she saw blood
dripping down his face. “Oh my God! What did she do to you?”

Spike turned his head away as Buffy grabbed his chin, looking at the long
scratches that marred one side of his face.

“Spike! Answer me.”

“She wasn’t too happy that I kept my promise to you, luv.”

Buffy felt tears begin to shimmer in her eyes at the admission.

“Let’s get out of here,” Buffy said.

“I didn’t get the negatives,” Spike said wearily as they walked down the
remaining stairs.

“I did,” Buffy replied.

“What?” Spike asked in confusion.

“I knew the photographer.”

Spike was about to respond when he followed Buffy’s gaze to the door, his
cold gaze settling on the man he’d seen with Buffy. The man who had taken
her out on a date. Before Buffy could even comprehend what was happening,
Spike had crossed the foyer and thrown a punch at Lindsey, knocking him to
the floor.

“Spike! Now’s not the time!”

Spike didn’t listen, pulling Lindsey up by his collar to hit him again.
Buffy ran over, not feeling the need to defend Lindsey, but she knew Spike
would beat him to within an inch of his life if she didn’t do something.

Buffy caught Spike’s arm on a downfall, nearly getting knocked off her feet
with the momentum of it but still holding tight. Spike stopped when he
felt her small hand around his arm, turning to look at her with fury in his
eyes that Buffy knew was saved for Lindsey.

“Buffy, if you tell me he doesn’t deserve it-“

“No, he deserves it,” Buffy said, staring into his eyes. “But this isn’t
going to help anything right now.”

“The hell it’s not,” Spike replied, turning his gaze back to Lindsey. “It’s
making me feel much better.”

Buffy gently tugged on Spike’s arm, moderately relieved when Spike backed
away. Lindsey climbed, painfully, to his feet, gripping the doorframe for
balance.

“My Spike always did have a temper.”

It was Buffy’s turn to want to attack someone as she watched Drusilla walk
down the stairs.

“He’s not yours,” Buffy said with a raised eyebrow.

“That’s right,” Drusilla said with a creepy smile. “He’s yours now, isn’t
he, Sunshine?”

“No,” Buffy said calmly, seeing Spike look at her out of the corner of her
eye. “He doesn’t belong to anyone, but if he did, you then would be last on
the list.”

Spike smirked at Buffy, wrapping his arm around her waist as he turned for
the door.

“I’m surprised he would pick someone like you, considering the breeding you
come from.”

Buffy slowly turned to face the woman she used to view as competition. Now
she viewed her as a nuisance. “Breeding?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Considering your trashy mother, it’s no surprise that she raised a whore of
a daughter.”

Spike watched in shock as Buffy took several slow steps toward his
soon-to-be ex-wife, throwing her tiny fist at Drusilla’s face and knocking
her off her feet.

Buffy took a step back as Drusilla screamed in over-dramatized agony. “Say
whatever you want to about me,” Buffy said in a low tone. “But you
disrespect my family, and you have to deal with the consequences. Besides…people who live
in glass whorehouses shouldn’t throw stones.” She smiled when Dru looked up
at her with a glare. “You think everyone in town doesn’t know that you
sleep around with anyone who will have you? You’ve done more to Spike than
he has EVER done to you.” Buffy turned, taking Spike’s hand in hers. “Let’s
go,” she murmured.

“You think he loves you?” Dru asked as they walked through the door. “You
think he’ll stay with you when the cheap thrill is over? No…he’ll come back
to me, just like he always has.”

Buffy was about to turn around when Spike gripped her hand firmly in his
own. “No,” he said, looking at Drusilla. “You were the cheap thrill-
Buffy’s the one I’m meant to be with.” Spike turned to Buffy, raising her
hand to his lips and leaving a gentle kiss on it. “Let’s get out of here.
I never want to see this place again.”

“Me neither,” Buffy agreed, following him outside.

Lindsey looked at the couple walking toward the driveway before turning
back to his former employer. As quickly as he could, he walked through the
house to the office, opening the top drawer of the desk and extracting the
envelope he’d seen her put there when he gave them to her.

“What are you doing?” Drusilla asked from the doorway, looking panicked as
Lindsey pushed past her, gripping the envelope.

“The right thing,” he replied. “I’m not going to let you ruin someone’s
life just because you’re bitter.”

“It’s a little bit late to be growing a conscience, isn’t it?”

"Better late than never,” Lindsey said, walking out the door as Drusilla
screamed. He could see Spike starting the car and waved at them to stop.
Buffy leaned over to say something to Spike as Lindsey approached. She
opened the door, stepping out and crossing her arms over her chest as he
offered her the envelope.

“What’s this?”

“I think they rightfully belong to you.”

Buffy looked at the pictures before tossing them in the car. “I trusted
you, Lindsey…you were my friend.”

“I know…and that’s why I’m trying to make it better.”

Buffy sighed, looking at Spike who was keeping a careful eye on the two of
them, before raising her eyes to Lindsey again. “I’m not ready to forgive
you.”

“I’m not asking you to. I just wanted to do something right for a change.”

“Thank you.”

Lindsey nodded as Buffy got back in the car.

“Everything okay, pet?”

“Everything’s fine,” Buffy replied with a small smile. “I’m just ready to
get out of here.”

“Yeah,” Spike agreed. “Let’s go home.”

Buffy smiled, realizing that he considered ‘home’ to be with her.

Chapter 17 – And the Winner is…


“You’re on your way home?” Buffy asked into the cell phone as she
straightened her desk, ready to go home after a long day.

“Yeah,” Spike replied. “Hopefully I won’t have to come back here for
another week. I guess we’ll have to see. I’m sorry I’m running late.”

“It’s okay,” Buffy said with a shrug he couldn’t see. “Besides, I’m still
at the school. I decided to work late and take advantage of you not being
here. It’s your job, it’s important.”

“Not as important as you,” he said softly, wishing he could be there to hold
her.

“Is that a line?” Buffy asked with a smile.

“It could be,” he said with a chuckle. “But in this case, it’s the truth.”
Spike got quiet as he stared at the endless road ahead of him, the lights of
Los Angeles shining behind him. “I love you, baby.”

Buffy smiled at the whispered words, knowing she would never get tired of
hearing them. “I love you, too,” she said softly, turning off the lights to
her classroom as she walked toward the exit. “You be careful. I don’t want
my boyfriend to get in an accident.”

“What about your husband?”

Buffy stopped in her tracks as the exit door slammed behind her. “What are
you saying?”

“I want to be with you, Buffy,” he said quietly. “We’ve been through more
than most couples…I think we’re ready.”

“Spike-“

“Although, I’m not ready to make it official, yet.”

Buffy began slowly walking to her car. “So…was that just a joke? Make a
halfhearted attempt at a proposal and then take it away?”

“No,” Spike said with a smile. “It means, when I make it official, you’re
going to have everything you deserve. The ring, champagne, candlelight, and
most importantly…me.”

Buffy laughed with him. “I’ll tell you what, you bring yourself home, and
the rest can be up for debate.”

“Okay, luv,” he said softly. “I’ll see you soon. I love you.”

“I love you, too. Be careful.”

Buffy disconnected the call with a smile still on her face.

“You think you’ve won, don’t you?”

Buffy felt her heart drop into her stomach at the sound of that chilling
voice. Not wanting to show any weaknesses, she dropped her bag onto the
hood of her car, turning to face Drusilla.

“I know I’ve won,” Buffy replied, crossing her arms over her chest. She
could barely see the other woman in the shadows, and Buffy was suddenly
wishing she hadn’t decided to work late that night. “What do you want?”

“My husband.”

“I’m sorry, but that’s the wrong answer,” Buffy said in a falsely bright
tone. “You’ll get the lovely parting gift of divorce papers…oh, wait!” she
continued, in faux innocence. “You already got those this morning, didn’t
you?”

“He will always come back to me,” Drusilla replied, stepping out of the
shadows.

Buffy’s eyes widened at the sight of the moonlight glinting off the
butcher’s knife in her hands. She tried to discreetly step back, wanting to
put as much distance between herself and Dru as possible.

Buffy jumped in shock as the other woman lunged for her, swinging the knife
in her direction. Buffy was barely able to sidestep her, pressing herself
against the car.

“You know,” she said, feeling a lot more confident than she had any right to
be. “I always thought you were a psycho…thanks for confirming it.”

Drusilla shrieked, thrusting the blade at Buffy and slicing down the length
of her arm. Buffy could hear the fabric being shredded under the sharp
blade, but her only thought was to get to safety. Managing to break away,
Buffy made it ten feet before Dru’s voice filled her ears.

“I always knew you were a coward. You could never face up to anything.”

It could have potentially been the stupidest thing Buffy had ever done, but
she was tired of always backing down. Of always being the one to give in.
Turning around, Buffy backtracked her steps, ignoring the knife in the
woman’s hand as Dru watched her approach with a shocked expression.

With one swift movement, Buffy’s leg kicked out, dislodging the knife from
her grip and sending it clattering to the ground as Buffy swung back with
her arm and connected a solid punch to the Drusilla’s jaw.

“Something you should learn,” Buffy said with hard eyes as she stared at
her. “I don’t like playing the role of victim,” she continued, kicking
Dru’s legs out from under her. “And it’s really getting on my nerves that
people think they can control me.”

Walking over, Buffy picked up the knife, having no intention to use it
unless absolutely necessary. She walked to her car while keeping a close eye
on the woman staring back at her.

“Don’t move,” Buffy said in a menacing voice as she reached for her bag,
pulling out her cell phone.

Buffy gasped when she felt herself falling. She never knew how Dru moved so
fast, but she wasn’t really caring as her head cracked on the pavement.
Rolling over and jumping to her feet, Buffy jumped when she felt a hand on
her arm. Spinning around, she let loose with another kick, surprised when
she heard Lindsey’s voice as he yelled in pain.

“What’s going on?” he asked as he held his shin.

Buffy turned her gaze back to Drusilla, who was staring at her with loathing.
“Just an ex-wife, looking for payback.”

Lindsey looked between the two women before taking Buffy’s phone and dialing
the police. He hung up a moment later, watching as the women glared at each
other.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Lindsey asked Buffy.

Buffy never tore her gaze away from Drusilla as she nodded. “I’ll be much
better when the police take her away.”

* * * * *

An hour later, Buffy sat on the back of an ambulance, a blanket wrapped
around her shoulders with an icepack to her head. The cut on her arm was no
more than a scratch- her light jacket had taken the brunt of the blade, and
Buffy was relieved that she wouldn’t need stitches because she really didn’t
want to make a trip to the hospital.

“Buffy!”

Buffy looked up, taking the icepack away from her head as she saw Spike
running toward her, a panicked look on his face.

“Buffy! Are you okay?” he asked, cupping her face in his hands as his eyes
scanned her body looking for any type of injury.

“I’m fine,” she said with a small smile, breathing a sigh of relief as Spike
pressed his lips to hers. “How did you know I was here?”

Spike gestured around the parking lot at the police officers that were
milling around. “I tried to call your cell phone and an officer answered.
He told me what happened. I got here as quick as I could, baby.”

“I know,” Buffy replied, her voice exhausted after the long night. “Thank
you for being here.”

“Are you kidding? No one would be able to keep me away.” Spike kissed her
again before pressing his forehead to hers. “Luv, if I ever thought Dru
would do something like this, I-“

“Don’t,” Buffy whispered, shaking her head. “You couldn’t have known it
would be something this extreme. The important thing is that we’re okay and
she’s gone.”

“I’m just glad you’re alright.”

“She’s a fighter.”

Spike turned and faced Lindsey with a glare. “What the hell are you doing
here?” he growled.

“Lindsey helped me, Spike,” Buffy said quietly, holding onto his arm so he
wouldn’t try to approach the other man.

“Is that right?” Spike asked in a low, threatening voice. “And just what
are you doing here this late, McDonald?”

“Working late…same as your girl here.”

Spike narrowed his eyes when he felt Buffy’s hold on him tighten.

“Don’t,” Buffy whispered, shifting Spike’s attention back to her. “It’s not
worth it.”

Spike sighed, nodding as he wrapped his arms around her.

“Miss Summers,” an officer said, approaching the couple. “We have your
statement, and you’re free to go, unless you think you need further medical
attention.”

“No, I’m ready to go,” Buffy said, standing up with Spike’s assistance. She
paused in front of Lindsey as Spike was leading her to his car. “Thank
you,” she said softly.

“You’re welcome, Buffy.”

Buffy sighed, leaning her tired body against Spike. “Let’s go home.”

Spike gave the top of her head a gentle kiss before scooping her up in his
arms.

“Spike, I can walk.”

“I know,” Spike replied, not putting her down.

Buffy snuggled into his chest, breathing a sigh of relief as he carried her
to the car.

Epilogue


Seven Years Later


“Mommy’s home!” Spike yelled as he put down his two daughters, both of them
taking off to wrap their arms around their mother as she walked through the
door.

Buffy laughed, awkwardly bending down to give hugs and kisses to her little
blue eyed girls while they chattered about their day.

After a few minutes, Spike smiled and separated his girls from their mother.
“You two go play,” he said, shooing them toward their rooms.

Buffy smiled, greeting her husband with a kiss as he wrapped his arms around
her. “How are you, baby?” he asked softly.

“Tired,” Buffy replied. She was still working at the school, and the long
days were slowly wiping her out.

“Yeah,” Spike said sympathetically as he brushed his lips against her
forehead before kneeling down to nuzzle the swollen expanse of her belly.
“And how’s my third little princess?”

Buffy giggled, running her hands through his soft hair as he ran his hands
over her taut stomach. She was eight months pregnant with their third
daughter and feeling like she was going to pop any day. “She’s fine,” Buffy
said, her hands never stopping their movement. “She’s been kicking up a
storm all day.”

“Active little thing, aren’t you?” Spike asked her tummy with a chuckle.

He slowly stood up, reluctant to leave the soothing motion of her hands but
knowing she was ready to sit down after a rough day.

“You lay down on the couch,” he said, helping her over to it. “I’ll go
check on the girls and then make you some tea.”

Buffy nodded gratefully as she snuggled into the cushions. The past seven
years were a blur to both Buffy and Spike. After Drusilla had been
indefinitely committed to a mental institution, and was still there to this
day, Spike had felt guilty for pushing her over the edge, sinking into a
mild depression and desperately holding onto Buffy for support.

Buffy finally went with him to see a therapist and with some work, convinced
Spike that Drusilla’s mental problems had been there long before she’d even
met Spike. In fact, she was probably more damage to him than he was to
her.

Several months later, when they had settled into a healthy, comfortable
relationship, Spike made good on his promise to propose, giving her the
candlelight, champagne, and himself. He’d announced that he’d sold
everything that reminded him of Drusilla- the house, the cars, even the
apartment that Buffy had lived in, claiming that it reminded him of times
when he thought he could never have her.

The couple had been married a year later in a big wedding (at Spike’s
request, wanting to give his bride everything). A few months after, Buffy
had announced that she was pregnant, sending Spike into a tailspin of
decorating the nursery, pampering his wife, and rearranging his life and
career so he could be a stay-at-home dad. He had employed his old butler
Wesley as manager of his business, and Buffy had been shocked when he’d
announced he was going to run his PR business from their house, but she had
eagerly agreed, not wanting to give up her job so soon.

Five years, and nearly three little girls, later- the couple was as happy as
they’d ever been. Spike had eventually given up his resentment of Lindsey,
since he still worked at the school, but he still wasn’t on the best of
terms with him and knew he never would be.

“Are we still going out with Red and Tara?” Spike called from the kitchen.

“Change of plans,” Buffy called back. “I feel so swollen I can barely move,
so they’re going to bring over pizza and movies after we get the girls to
sleep.”

“Great,” Spike said grudgingly, walking into the living room with a steaming
mug of tea. “So, I guess I’m going to be subjected to a realm of chick
flicks, am I right?”

Buffy laughed as Spike handed her the mug, sitting down next to her. “I
wouldn’t be surprised…but you’ll stick around for me, right?” she asked with
a pout.

Spike smiled, kissing her pouty lip before breaking away and trailing kisses
along her jaw and down her neck. “You know I will,” he said in a husky
whisper.

Buffy set the mug down, turning to give him a better angle to her neck and
sighing at the feel of his soft lips against her skin. “I can’t wait till
this baby gets here,” he murmured against her throat.

“Me neither,” Buffy replied, running her hands through his hair.

“That way we can get started on a fourth.”

Buffy pulled away, her eyes wide as she looked at him. “What!?!”

Spike tried to suppress his laughter, biting his bottom lip and trying to
convey an innocent look. “Well, I’m going to want a boy eventually, luv.”

Buffy raised an eyebrow at her husband. “Then you can carry the next one
for nine months.”

Spike finally laughed, pressing a soft kiss to her lips. “It’s a deal. And
we will definitely have fun trying.”

Buffy giggled as they fell back on the couch laughing and kissing,
exchanging soft touches and whispers as they looked at each other, showing
all of their feelings with a simple look.

Spike’s expression turned serious as he looked at Buffy, brushing the hair
out of her eyes.

“Something wrong?” Buffy asked.

Spike shook his head, a smile playing on his lips as their two girls came
running down the stairs, throwing themselves on the couch with their
parents. Spike and Buffy laughed as their daughters began talking against
each other. Spike raised his eyes back to his wife’s, getting lost in her
emerald depths as the sounds of their girls faded into the background.

“I’ve waited for this for so long,” he said, running his hand over her
stomach.

“The baby?” Buffy asked, tilting her head to his.

“The family,” Spike replied. “A family with you.”

Buffy gave him a warm smile before they began laughing again as the girls
wedged their way in between them. Buffy leaned forward, capturing Spike’s
lips in a tender kiss as a chorus of ‘eews’ filled the air. Breaking away
from each other, Spike smiled. “Even if they do know how to spoil the
moment.”

Pressing his lips to hers for another kiss, Spike and Buffy suppressed their
laughter as more shrieks surrounded them.




THE END