Chapter 11:

“Spike, have you talked to Buffy?” Fred asked when she came to work two days later. “I tried calling her house last night and this morning, but no one answered.”

“Is she supposed to work or something?” Spike asked, looking at a receipt for a recent delivery.

“No, I just wanted to talk to her,” Fred answered, watching Spike. “So you haven’t talked to her?”

“No,” Spike answered, walking into the office. Fred raised an eyebrow, confused.

‘I wonder what I missed between them,’ she thought. ‘Because I have a feeling that something is wrong.’

“Maybe I should go over there and check in on her,” Fred said, going to the office. Spike looked at her.

‘Did Lindsey get out of jail?’ he thought, becoming worried. ‘He wouldn’t go to Buffy’s, would he?’ He tensed up. ‘If he got to her-’

“No, I’ll go over there,” he said, quickly grabbing his keys and running out of the gallery.

“Yes, something is definitely not right here,” Fred said quietly, walking into the storage room.

When Spike arrived at Buffy’s house, he noticed that her car was gone.

‘I wonder where she went,’ he thought. ‘If her car is gone, she’s probably alright…right? Lindsey wouldn’t be stupid enough to kidnap her in her car, is he?’ He frowned. ‘Bloody hell.’ He grabbed his cell phone and called Fred at the gallery.

“Can you call the police department and ask them if Lindsey McDonald is still in jail?” he asked.

“What?” Fred asked, stunned. “He’s in jail? Since when?”

“I’ll explain everything later,” Spike said. “Just make the call- please.” He hung up and went to the back door of the house before looking in through a window.

‘Nothing seems out of place or broken,’ he thought. ‘So if he came here, it doesn’t look like there was a struggle.’ He paused. ‘Maybe that’s not a good thing.’

He smoked a cigarette to calm his nerves until Fred called.

“Yes, Lindsey is still incarcerated,” Fred said. “What’s going on?”

“I’ll tell you later,” he said. “Right now, I’m worried about Buffy. She’s not home.”

“Maybe she went out shopping or something,” Fred suggested.

“Her and I had a fight the other day,” Spike replied. “And I can’t help but think that she’s not just out shopping or something.”

“I’m sure she’s fine, Spike,” Fred said. “Don’t panic or anything yet.” He sighed.

‘Too late- I’m past being panicked,’ he thought. ‘I’m bloody terrified.’

* * *

A week later, Buffy pulled up in her driveway, getting out of her car and stretching after a long trip back from Los Angeles. She brought her bags inside and looked at her answering machine- 27 new messages.

“Wow, I’m one popular girl,” she said quietly, deleting the messages and getting the mail from her mailbox out front. “And enough mail to fill a trash can.” She was on her way back inside when she saw a car pull up in front of her house.

‘Not now,’ she thought, frowning. ‘I don’t want to do this right now.’

Spike got out of his car and practically sprinted towards her before hugging her tightly, not willing to let her go.

“I can’t breathe, Spike,” she said quietly, and he eased off, taking a small step back.

“I was so worried,” he said, looking at her. “I called you a billion times- at home, on your cell phone…I even called Hank.”

“I know,” Buffy said. “I was there and heard him talking to you.”

“You were there?” he asked, confused. “Hank said he hadn’t heard from you. And unless he’s that daft-”

“I told him to lie to you,” she said, turning and going back inside. He quickly followed her inside and shut the door.

“Why didn’t you call me? I was scared out of my mind, Buffy! I thought something happened to you,” he said sternly, looking at her.

“I needed to get away from here for a while,” she said, her back to him. “Besides, I’m sure your girlfriend made sure you weren’t lonely in my absence.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” he asked, confused.

“I saw Harmony go to your place the night we…I assumed she was going there for you,” she said. “Wasn’t she?”

“Yes, but her and I aren’t dating again, pet,” he said, leaning back against the door. “I called her over because I needed to talk to someone.”

“So why didn’t you call me instead and try talking to me?” she asked, somewhat hurt.

“Because I thought you needed your space,” he replied. “Didn’t ever imagine you’d run off to get it, though.”

“So you’re not dating Harmony?” she asked, clarifying.

“She’s strictly a friend,” he answered. “You know I only care about you, Buffy.” She looked down. “That’s why you left town? Because you thought I was with her again?”

“I didn’t want to be here if it was true,” she said sadly. “I couldn’t believe it in the first place.”

“You’re the only girl I want to be with,” he said, moving forward to graze her cheek. She took a step back, and he raised an eyebrow.

“I don’t think I want that anymore, Spike,” she said, looking away. “I thought I did, but after really thinking things over in L.A., I think it’s best if we just stay friends.” He stared at her, stunned. “I’m sorry.”

“I don’t understand,” he replied. “What aren’t you sure about? I’ll do anything to prove how much I care about you, luv. You name it- I’ll do it.”

“I just don’t think it’s a good idea right now,” she said. “Not after the thing with Lindsey, and losing Mom, and…I need to be on my own for a while. I just feel like it’s the right thing to do.”

“Buffy, please,” he said, not bothering to mask how pleading his tone sounded. “Let’s talk about this.”

“I don’t want to,” she said. “This is what I want to do.” He clenched his jaw and held back the tears that were forming in his eyes.

“Do you really think things are going to work the way you want them to if we just stay friends?” he asked. “Between us working together and-”

“I quit my job at the gallery,” she cut in, and he looked at her with wide eyes. “I didn’t want to work there when school started up anyways, and it’s easier if I’m not there.”

“You’re not working there anymore?” he asked, shocked. “At your mum’s gallery?”

“It’s too hard, Spike,” she said. “Dealing with the memories of her there, you being around… I can’t do it.”

“Buffy, I think you need to sit back and rethink things,” he said. “You’re making a big mistake, and I can’t stand by and watch you do this.” She looked at him.

“Then don’t ‘stand by and watch’,” she replied. “Because I’ve made up my mind, and this is what I want. If you can’t respect that, then…I guess you really don’t care about me after all.” He looked at her, upset. “I’ll see you around, Spike.” She walked upstairs and let herself into her bathroom, closing the door and locking it before she leaned against it and sank to the floor.

‘Maybe it’s a mistake,’ she thought. ‘But it’s for the best. For both of us.’

Chapter 12:

That night, Buffy had trouble falling asleep. She had received a call earlier that evening from the police department, telling her that several other girls had come forward to testify against Lindsey.

‘So apparently I’m not the first girl he hit,’ she thought, sighing as she opened her eyes and looked outside. ‘Who knows how many others there are, even. I guess it really was a good idea to turn him in. There was no reason for me to protect him- he’s abusive and deserves to be in jail.’ She took a deep breath. ‘And thank god I didn’t fall for his pathetic excuses or lies.’ She closed her eyes again. ‘I can’t wait for a lawyer to throw the book at him. He deserves to be made some guy’s bitch in prison.’ She giggled to herself and slowly drifted off to sleep.

Some time in the night, she began to toss and turn, getting tangled up in her sheets as she had a flashback dream she didn’t particularly want to relive.

Buffy came home from the funeral and sat on the couch, staring at the blank TV screen.

‘My mom is gone,’ she thought, tears forming in her eyes. ‘She’s dead…buried…I’m never going to see my mother again.’ She began sobbing for perhaps the tenth time that day. She was beginning to calm down when she heard the doorbell ring. She stood up and walked to the door, furiously trying to wipe off her eyes and cheeks so that it wouldn’t appear that she was crying.

When she was faced with Spike, she looked at him, both surprised and upset that he was there.

‘Of all the people who could’ve shown up on my doorstep tonight, it’s him,’ she thought, crossing her arms. She raised an eyebrow when he sighed and put his hands in his pockets.

“Hi, Buffy,” he said quietly, noticing that her eyes were red and her cheeks were splotchy.

‘She may be hell on wheels, but she doesn’t deserve to live through pain like this,’ he thought. ‘Especially on her own.’

“Where’s Hank?” he asked, looking around.

“He went back to L.A. for the night,” she answered, looking down. “He has some stuff to finalize at work before he moves here to run the gallery for a while.”

“You’re by yourself?” he asked, and she nodded, biting back tears.

‘I never used to be here alone,’ she thought. ‘Mom was always here. Always.’ A tear escaped her eye and rolled down her cheek. Spike saw it and extended his hand to gently wipe it away with his thumb. She looked at him and saw that his eyes were watery, too. Before she could think about what she was doing, she hugged him and buried her face in his shoulder, sobbing. He wrapped his arms around her and tried to be strong for her, even though he was crying with her. As her shoulders began shaking from the force of her sobs, he stroked her hair and tried to calm her down.

‘But how do you console someone who just lost their mum?’ he thought sadly. ‘There’s nothing you can do to make it better.’

She broke away from him and wiped off her eyes, thankful she hadn’t worn mascara that day.

“I’m sorry,” she said quietly, not looking at him. “Your shirt looks horrible.” He waved it off.

“Just a shirt,” he replied. “Doesn’t matter.” She smiled softly and looked at him. He managed a small smile. “Are you okay, luv? Do you want me to stay?”

“I…I don’t want to be alone,” she said, slowly moving closer to him again. His eyes widened as she leaned up to kiss him.

‘What is she doing?’ he thought. ‘This isn’t right…oh, screw it.’ He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her back gently, still confused and surprised by the sudden change in her. As the kiss intensified, Buffy pushed Spike’s jacket off of his shoulders and broke away to look up at him.

“Will you stay for a while?” she asked anxiously, taking his hand in hers as he nodded. She pulled him towards the stairs, but he stopped her before she could step on the first stair.

“Pet, doing anything more than kissing probably isn’t a good idea,” he said, mentally kicking himself for suddenly having a conscience. “We’re both sad…I don’t think it’s right.”

“I need you,” she said, looking at him, and he could see the sincerity in her eyes. “And I know that we’re both sad, but maybe we just need to comfort each other.” He took a deep breath before kissing her again. She smiled against his lips. “Now, can we go upstairs already?”

“Okay,” he said, nodding. She led him up to her bedroom and closed the door behind them. “Isn’t it just us here?” She nodded, looking at him. “So why did you close the door?”

“I don’t know,” she answered, frowning. “Just seemed like the right thing to do, I guess.” He smiled at her and kissed her, pulling her close to him. She worked on unbuttoning his shirt while he kicked off his shoes and took off his belt. She slid his shirt down his arms and off, letting it fall to the floor. She looked at his exposed torso and unconsciously licked her lips.

‘I always knew he had to be somewhat muscular,’ she thought. ‘And I definitely wasn’t wrong.’ She ran her hands slowly down his chest and abs, stopping when her fingers reached the closure of his pants. She looked into his eyes, searching for permission, and was surprised to see how lust-filled his eyes suddenly seemed to be.

“Are you sure about this, Buffy?” he asked quietly. “Because if we start, I don’t know how easy it will be to stop.” She slid off her shirt and unclasped her bra, tossing it aside, before looking at his reaction. He looked at her dreamily for a moment before his gaze became hungry once again. He rested his hands on her hips and slowly slid his hands up her sides before gently cupping her breasts in his hands and smiling when she moaned quietly from the contact.

“I’m sure,” she answered, undoing the button on his pants and sliding the zipper down before pushing his pants down his slim hips and letting them fall to his feet. She looked at his impressive erection and bit back a smirk.

‘Always thought he’d be well-endowed, too,’ she thought. ‘And thank god I wasn’t wrong about that.’ He watched her evaluating him and smiled.

“See anything you want, sweetheart?” he asked in a low tone, and she looked at him coyly.

“Yeah,” she answered, wrapping her hand around the base of his erection, getting him to groan loudly. “Is this alright?”

“It’s bloody fantastic,” he managed to say as she began to move her hand up and down his shaft, applying a slight amount of pressure. “Take anything you’d like, baby. You can have anything.”

“I’ll take anything I can,” she said, looking into his eyes.

She bolted upright in bed, breathing heavily and sweating slightly.

“It was all my fault that night,” she said quietly, trying to regulate her breathing. “This has all been my fault.”
 

Chapter 13:

Over a month passed before Spike saw her again. Whenever he tried calling her, he hung up as soon as he heard her voice, partially because he just wanted to know she was okay. Otherwise, he realized that he didn’t know what to say to her- he knew she was stubborn, and breaking the Buffy shell wasn’t going to be accomplished with one phone call. He even drove past her house regularly, and whenever he saw her car in the driveway, he couldn’t bring himself to go to her door. He was lost without her and concerned about her.

‘But she’s young and doesn’t know what she wants yet,’ he thought. ‘Whereas I do, and I’m not going to give up until I know that it’s definitely never going to happen between us.’

When he went to the Bronze one night to get a drink, he was somewhat surprised to see Buffy there, walking around with a brunette guy and laughing at something he had said.

‘Of course, she’s with a guy that’s close to her age,’ Spike thought, sitting on a stool and trying to keep himself from approaching her. ‘No one else should be privileged with hearing her laugh, just me.’ He sighed and ordered a beer. ‘But she doesn’t want you anymore, Spike.’ He grabbed the beer bottle the bartender offered him and returned to watching her and the boy, softly smiling when he saw Willow by her side. ‘At least Red is still around- she was always a nice girl.’ He took a drink of his beer. ‘What does the whelp have that I don’t? Honestly, I’m more fetching than he is, I’ve got a good job, I… I’m actually jealous over some guy that doesn’t look old enough to shave.’ He looked down, into the bottle. ‘God, I’ve really lost her, haven’t I?’

* * *

Buffy felt someone’s eyes on her and turned to look across the club, seeing Spike at the bar. She tensed up and took a deep breath.

“You alright, Buff?” Xander asked, looking at her. “You seem kind of pale suddenly.” She looked at him and managed a weak smile.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she answered. “I think I’m going to head out.”

“What? The night is young,” Xander said, looking at his watch. “A lot younger than us.” She smiled and shrugged.

“I’m tired,” Buffy said, faking a yawn. “Didn’t sleep well last night.”

‘Or any night over the last few weeks,’ she thought.

“Do you want us to take you home?” Willow asked, worried.

“No, I’ll be fine,” Buffy said, waving it off. “You two go and party like it’s 1999.”

“You know, I didn’t actually ‘party’ in 1999,” Xander said, frowning. “And to think, it was the end of one millennium, not to mention the fact most of the population thought we were going to die. Anyone else remember Y2K?”

“Have a good night, guys,” Buffy cut in, smiling at both of her friends before walking outside to her car and getting in. She took a deep breath as she put the key in the ignition and paused.

‘He looked good,’ she thought. ‘At least I know he’s okay. That’s all that matters- that he’s okay.’

* * *

“So, how are you feeling today?” Willow asked the next afternoon as she walked through Buffy’s front door.

“I’m fine,” she answered. “Got about four hours of sleep, which is an improvement from the night before it.”

“Why can’t you sleep well anymore?” Willow asked, sitting down on the couch. “You never had problems before, even after your mom died.”

“I kind of know why,” Buffy said quietly, sitting down beside her friend. “You remember Spike, right?”

“The hottie from the gallery?” Willow asked, smiling. “The bane of your existence?”

“The very one,” Buffy answered, smiling a little.

“What about him?” Willow asked. “Is he giving you nightmares or something?”

“Willow, something kind of happened between Spike and I,” Buffy said, looking down. Willow held back a surprised gasp as her eyes widened.

“What do you mean by ‘something kind of happened’?” she asked.

“Well, in a moment of extreme weakness, I kind of decided to…sleep with him,” Buffy mumbled, closing her eyes so she wouldn’t have to see Willow’s reaction.

“A moment of weakness that I’ve been expecting to hear about for a long time,” Willow said, smirking, and Buffy opened her eyes, surprised. “Oh, come on- I’m not blind, Buffy. I’ve seen the way he looks at you and vice versa. I’m just surprised it took you so long to go for it.”

“Wait- you’re not disappointed? Or shocked?” Buffy asked, still stunned.

“What? No,” Willow replied. “So, what are the details? Was it romantic? Was he good?”

“Willow!” Buffy replied, blushing and looking down. “He was very good, stress on the ‘very’.”

“Good, you deserve a stallion,” Willow said, grinning. Buffy looked at her friend.

“Will you stop it? I’m going to be redder than your hair if you keep this up,” she said, crossing her arms.

“So, when did it happen?” Willow asked, leaning back against a pillow.

“The night of the funeral,” Buffy answered.

“And you’re just telling me this now?” Willow asked, her eyes wide.

“I didn’t know how you’d react,” Buffy said. “I thought you’d be upset with me.”

“Of course not,” Willow said. “You know I’m support-girl.” Buffy smiled softly. “So what’s the deal then? Why aren’t you in the arms of Mr. Salty Goodness right now?”

“Because I told him that I couldn’t handle it,” Buffy replied quietly. “I told him I needed to be on my own.”

“And how much of that was true?” her friend asked, studying her.

“About 20%,” Buffy answered. “After Lindsey, I guess I just needed to get away from guys for a while.”

“And reasonably so,” Willow said. “That’d be traumatic for anyone to face, especially a girl who lost her mother a short time before the abuse kicked in.”

“He was at the Bronze last night,” Buffy said. “That’s why I bailed so quickly.”

“And you didn’t want to see him?” Willow asked, and Buffy shook her head. “Things ended that badly?”

“I guess, yeah,” Buffy said, looking down. “I really screwed it up. This is all my fault.” She bit back tears. “Why did I push him away?”

“Love’s a funny thing,” Willow said, putting her hand on Buffy’s. Buffy looked up, surprised.

“This…you think that I… no, I can’t,” Buffy said quickly, standing up and pacing around the room.

“Why not?” Willow asked. “He’s a good man, Buffy. Loving him is one of the best choices you could ever make.” Buffy looked at Willow before taking a deep breath.

“I don’t think I can, Willow,” she said, tearing up. “It’s just not right.”

“You can’t control who you love,” Willow said, shrugging. “That’s not the way it works a lot of the time.”

“I…just need more time,” Buffy replied, sighing.

* * *

Buffy walked into the gallery a few days later and saw Fred walking around. The brunette looked at her and instantly smiled before quickly walking to the blonde and hugging her.

“Hi, Fred,” Buffy said, smiling. “How’s it going?”

“Fine,” Fred answered, surprised to see her. “What brings you in? I thought you said you’d be staying away from here.” Buffy looked down. “Not that I want you to stay away…or leave…don’t mind me- I like to babble. How are you doing?”

“I’m okay,” Buffy answered. “How’s the gallery doing?”

“Pretty well,” Fred said, motioning around. “We’ve been getting in new shipments a lot lately, so Spike and I’ve been running behind a bit, but everything’s going fairly well right now.”

“It’s just you two working?” Buffy asked quietly, and Fred nodded. “I didn’t know.”

“We’re chugging along, though,” Fred said, shrugging.

“Well, if you ever need help, you know where I am,” Buffy said, looking at the older woman. “Anything I can do to keep the gallery up and running is good.”

“I couldn’t ask you to do that,” Fred replied. “Not when you’re starting school soon.”

“I’ve got almost a month off still,” Buffy said. “I think I can manage it for a while.”

“Well, great, then,” Fred said, smiling. “So, what compelled you to visit today?”

“I was wondering if Spike was around, actually,” Buffy said, putting her hands in her shorts’ pockets.

“He’s in the back room,” Fred answered. “Have you two talked since…” Buffy shook her head. “Oh.”

“I think it’s time I at least say hi or something,” Buffy said. “It’s been a long time.”

“He was really sad, Buffy,” Fred said. “I don’t think I’ve seen Spike that down before.” Buffy looked down. “I just hope you two can work something out. I hate seeing my friends upset.” Buffy nodded and headed towards the storage room. “And, Buffy?” She turned around. “I’m happy you’re here.” Buffy smiled and kept walking, taking a deep breath before she entered the back room.

Spike turned when he heard the door open and tensed up when he saw Buffy standing there.

“Hi,” she said quietly, looking at him anxiously.

Chapter 14:

Before Fred could look in on Buffy and Spike, the phone rang in the office. She made a face and went to go answer it.

“Hello?” she asked, somewhat impatient to end the call before it even began.

“Hello, Winifred,” Hank said. “I just thought I’d call and see how things are going.”

“They’re fine,” she said, looking at the door to the storage room. “Buffy actually just stopped by to say hello.”

“How is she doing?” he asked. “I haven’t spoken to her in a month.” Fred looked down.

“She seems to be doing well,” she answered. “She looks like the same old Buffy. No piercings, tattoos…visibly, at least.” Hank chuckled. “But I think she’s doing okay.”

“Is she still seeing William?” Hank asked, and Fred smiled softly.

“Honestly, I don’t know,” she said. “They broke up for a while, but I think they might be trying to work things out.” Hank sighed. “Do you really not want them to be together?”

“You know, I used to think that, but honestly, I think out of anyone there, he will take the best care of her,” Hank said. “I know he’s protective of her and cares about her, and as a father, you can’t ask for much more than that.” Fred smiled. “In fact, I think I’d like you to offer him his old job back.” Fred giggled quietly.

“I’ll be sure to tell him that,” she replied.

“Good,” he said, sighing. “Can you be sure to tell her I called and wish them well for me?”

“I’d love to,” she said. “Take care, Hank.” She hung up and looked at the back room’s door again.

‘I just hope I have a reason to wish them well now,’ she thought before quietly exiting the office.

* * *

Spike couldn’t take his eyes off of Buffy, thoroughly shocked to see her.

‘What’s she doing here?’ he thought. ‘Not that I mind, but-’

“Hi,” he replied, hoping he didn’t sound as stunned as he felt.

‘I’ve waited for this moment for weeks, and now I can’t even think of a word to say,’ he thought. ‘Think, you bloody wanker, think!’

“What’re you doing here?” he asked.

‘Really smooth, Spike,’ he berated himself. ‘Make it sound like you don’t want her here. You’re such a dumb ass.’

“I wanted to check in on you and Fred,” she answered, sitting down on a crate. “I guess curiosity got the better of me.”

“Yeah, well, curiosity killed the cat,” he replied, cutting open a box.

“I saw you a few nights back,” she said, watching him. He looked at the box, frowning.

“I saw you, too,” he said, and she raised an eyebrow. “Your boyfriend seems…tall.”

“What?” she asked, confused. “What’re you talking about?”

“The whelp you were with at the Bronze about a week ago,” he answered, opening the box.

“Xander?” she asked, smiling. “He’s not my boyfriend.” He looked at her, inwardly relieved. “Don’t tell me you were jealous over Xander Harris.”

“You’re not dating him?” he asked, and she shook her head. “Oh.” He ran a hand through his hair, chuckling. “Sorry, I guess I just assumed.”

“It’s okay,” she answered, looking down. “What about you? Are you dating someone?”

“No,” he answered, and she smiled softly.

“William, I’m sorry,” she said, looking at him. He tilted his head, watching her carefully. “I’m sorry I’ve been a bitch to you for as long as I’ve known you, but more specifically, over the last couple of months. And I know I’ve hurt you- more than I know, I’d imagine- and simply apologizing probably isn’t good enough, but I do mean it when I say that I’m sorry.”

“Been thinking over the situation between us for the last month?” he asked, studying her. She sighed.

“Yes,” she answered. “I guess it hit me that I’ve been incredibly horrible to you, and even though I’ve used it as an excuse before, you haven’t deserved it.” She paused, smiling. “Most of the time.” He looked down, smiling, too. “I should probably go.” She stood up, but before she could walk out, he caught up to her and turned her around.

“You and I’ve been through a lot together, Goldilocks,” he said, looking into her eyes. “Most of which has been bad.” She nodded, looking down, but he tilted her chin up. “And I’m sorry I gave you a reason to not want me around.”

“Will-” she said quietly, but he put a finger over her lips to silence her.

“But I care about you, Buffy, and for as long as I live, that’s never going to stop,” he said. “Whether you want me around or not, I’m going to care about you because we’ve lived through some challenging times together, some things that I know I will never forget.” She felt her eyes misting up. “So no matter what you say to me or do…I’m going to forgive you for the last couple of months because I’m just as much to blame as you are.” She let a tear roll down her cheek. “And stop crying because I might start and that just wouldn’t be good.” She laughed and wiped off her eyes.

“You have a way with words, you know that?” she asked, looking up at him. He smiled and wiped off her cheeks gently before cupping them and leaning down to kiss her. “Thank you, Spike.”

“What happened to calling me William?” he asked, smirking. She giggled and wrapped her arms around him, an action he reciprocated. “I like the way it sounds when you say it.”

“Thank you, William,” she said, looking up at him, and he kissed her once again.

They heard clapping off to the side and broke apart to look at Fred, standing in the doorway and grinning.

“It looks as if we have an audience, kitten,” Spike said, looking at Buffy, who slightly blushed.

“Am I witnessing a reconciliation?” Fred asked giddily, and Buffy looked up at Spike, smiling.

“Are we reconciling?” she asked, and he kissed her forehead.

“Yes, luv, I think we are.”

Chapter 15:

“I just don’t understand how a girl your age can have so much stuff,” Spike said, grabbing a box from Willow’s car. She smiled sheepishly and shrugged.

“I have a lot of books,” she said quietly, getting a box. “I can’t thank you enough for helping me move in.”

“And I can’t thank you enough for moving in with her,” Spike replied, smiling as he watched Buffy walk outside and towards them. “At least I know she won’t be alone here anymore.” Buffy reached them and kissed his cheek before getting a box.

“What am I missing?” she asked curiously, looking between her friend and boyfriend.

“We’re just talking about how your roots are showing,” Spike lied, grinning at her. She looked at him indignantly, her jaw dropped.

“You’re one to talk, bleach boy,” she replied, glaring at him. He chuckled and headed for the house. She looked at Willow. “Does my hair really look that bad?”

“He was kidding,” Willow answered, smiling. “It looks perfect.” Buffy sighed and started to walk towards the house again. “So, are you excited to have me as a permanent fixture in your house as of today?”

“You have no idea,” Buffy said, smirking. “It’s going to be like a slumber party, only every single day.”

“Will there be a sexy pillow fight or two?” Spike asked as the girls walked inside. Buffy playfully punched his arm. “What? Can’t blame a bloke for asking.”

“I can blame you all I want, buster,” Buffy replied, walking up the stairs to Willow’s new room.

“I’m going to go get another box before getting us lunch,” Spike said, looking at Willow. “Want anything?”

“You’re really going above and beyond,” she said, smiling.

“Anything to make you girls happy,” he replied, smirking as Buffy began to walk downstairs.

“Are you coming on to my friend in my absence?” she asked, raising an eyebrow, amused.

“Just asking if we all could have a threesome sometime,” Spike answered, shrugging. Buffy instantly punched his arm again, but this time, he caught her wrist and brought her hand up to his mouth, kissing the back of it softly. “Stop hitting me.”

“I’ll stop hitting you when you stop making stupid jokes,” Buffy replied, smiling. He scowled playfully before kissing her temple and going to the door.

“That last one wasn’t a joke,” he said as he closed the door. Buffy looked at the now shut door and then at Willow.

“I have a feeling it’s going to be very interesting here,” Willow said, grinning as she went up to her room.

* * *

After they had finished moving all of Willow’s stuff in, Willow went to go meet up with Xander at the Espresso Pump while Spike went to his apartment to take a shower. Buffy was poking around in the attic when she heard the doorbell ring an hour later. She quickly made her way downstairs and to the door, nearly falling down the stairs in the process. She smiled when she was suddenly faced with Spike.

“Hi,” she said, raising an eyebrow when he extended a red rose to her. She took it and smelled it, grinning. “What’s this for?”

“For being so bloody perfect for me,” he said, wrapping his arms around her waist and gently kissing her. She smiled against his lips. “And I wanted to know if you’d like to go out to dinner with me tonight.”

“I’d love to,” she replied, heading towards the kitchen to put the rose in a vase. “Where to?”

“Doesn’t really matter, just as long as you’re with me,” he answered, smiling softly. “So, are you happy Red is living with you now?”

“Yeah,” she answered, getting a vase from a cabinet and filling it with water. “It’s nice to have her here.”

“I’d imagine it’s better than living in a house this size by yourself,” he said, sitting on the island in the center of the kitchen. “Having her around should make things more fun.”

“And we can have girls’ nights and watch chick flicks whenever we want,” she replied, smirking. “No boys allowed.” He faked hurt.

“You won’t let me be a part of watching sappy dramas and painting each others’ toenails?” he asked. She giggled and put the rose in the vase before walking over to him. He pulled her closer to him and kissed her forehead. “I’m happy you’re not alone here, luv.”

“Even though I suspect you still don’t think I’m safe,” she said, looking into his eyes. “Right?”

“Of course not,” he answered. “I feel a little better about it because she’s here, but if Lindsey ever came back-”

“Lindsey’s locked up, Spike,” she cut in. “He’s going to be for a while.”

“Which is a lovely thought, but even so, I don’t want to risk your safety anymore,” he said. “Not yours and not Red’s.” She sighed and looked down. “I could offer my services as a permanent bodyguard here.” She laughed and looked at him.

“Are you saying you want to move in?” she asked, and he nodded. “You’re just inviting yourself into my home?” He frowned. “Dad will flip out.”

“So I can?” he asked, grinning. She nodded and smiled when he kissed her, cupping her cheeks. “I love you.” Her eyes widened as she looked into his, seeing how sincere he was. “You don’t have to say it back- I just wanted to tell you that.” She leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to his lips before grazing his cheek.

“I love you, too, William,” she said quietly. He wrapped his arms around her and embraced her tightly.

“Do you think Red will mind a man in living in the house with you two?” he asked, running his hand over her hair.

“She’ll get over it,” Buffy answered, shrugging. “She doesn’t really have a choice- it’s my house.” He chuckled and got down from the island before pulling her flush up against him. She nuzzled her face against his chest.

“Do you think one day it will be our house?” he asked curiously, looking at her with a soft expression.

“You know, I kind of hope so,” she answered before he kissed her again.

Chapter 16:

“Remind me not to help anyone else move in,” Buffy said, stretching her arms after bringing in Spike’s last box. “And I think you have a lot more stuff than I do, mister.”

“I told you that you didn’t have to help,” he replied, walking up behind her and beginning to massage her shoulders. She smiled softly and shut her eyes, enjoying the feeling of his hands on her sore muscles.

“Why do you two have to be so damn cute?” Willow asked, smirking. Buffy looked at her friend. “It makes me feel like I need a man around.”

“You can borrow me whenever you’d like,” Spike said, winking at her. Buffy elbowed his ribs as Willow blushed and walked to her room. “What? I’m just trying to be helpful.”

“And you love seeing her cheeks turn as red as her hair,” Buffy replied, turning around to face him. He wrapped his arms around her waist and smiled at her. “So, how does it feel to be living with us officially now?”

“I’ve been here every night over the last week- doesn’t feel much different,” he said, running his hand over her hair. She leaned up to kiss his cheek before opening one of his boxes. “What’s in that one?”

“CDs,” she answered, looking at them. “Let’s see what’s in Spike’s music collection…” He opened up a box and began to pull clothes out of it. “No surprises here so far- Billy Idol, the Sex Pistols, The Clash, The Ramones…hold up.” She pulled a CD out and stared at it. “Spike, why the hell do you have a Barry Manilow CD?” He blushed and grabbed it from her quickly. She began laughing uncontrollably, sitting down on the bed.

“I didn’t buy it,” he said. “It’s a gift from my half-brother Liam.” She continued laughing, clutching her stomach. “It’s not that bleeding funny, pet. The guy isn’t all that bad.”

“So you admit to listening to him?” she managed to get out before laughing hysterically again. He sighed defeatedly and tossed the CD on the bed, next to her. She picked it up and looked at it, seeing what songs were on it. “You know, I think Mom used to have this. It seems familiar.”

“See, then he must not be so bad,” Spike replied, shoving some of his stuff into his closet.

“No, he’s still that bad,” she said, giggling a little still. “How can you listen to his? It’s horrible.”

“He has some good stuff,” he said defensively, walking over to sit beside her.

“If you ever play one of his songs to try to seduce me, it’s not going to work,” she said, smirking. He chuckled and took the CD away from her, tossing it aside before kissing her. “Besides, you’re only 28- you shouldn’t be listening to music like this yet. It’s for older people, not you.”

“It’s for anyone,” he said, laying back on the bed and stretching his arms out.

“Or maybe all of your British punk stuff is just a façade to cover up the fact that you’re a die hard fan of Mr. Manilow,” she said, bursting out into laughter again. He frowned and began mercilessly tickling her, causing her to shriek loudly.

Willow ran down the hall to see what was wrong and wasn’t surprised to see Spike tickling Buffy. She laughed and watched them for a moment, noticing how happy they both seemed.

‘It’s a nice change,’ she thought, leaning against the doorframe. ‘I wish I had what they have.’ Buffy saw Willow and managed to get away from Spike’s fingers, straightening out her clothes and taking a deep breath to calm her giggling.

“Hey, Will,” Buffy said, and Spike looked at the redhead, smirking. “What’s up?”

“Just wanted to see what all the commotion was,” she answered, smiling. “I thought maybe something was wrong.”

“No- Buffy was just insulting my music again,” Spike said, shrugging. Willow laughed and walked back to her room. He looked at his girlfriend, her cheeks slightly flushed. “So, kitten, want to help me unpack some more?”

“Am I going to find a Barry Manilow poster?” she asked, giggling again. He attacked her ribcage with his fingers, and she squealed louder than before.

As Willow sat down on her bed and heard her friend again, she shook her head, grinning.

‘And this is just day one,’ she thought.

* * *

That night, Buffy and Spike were lying on his bed, talking as the sun set outside, holding hands, their fingers laced together.

“Excited to work at the gallery again?” he asked, looking at her. She sighed, shrugging.

“Yeah, I guess I kind of missed it,” she answered. “I don’t think working there and going to school is going to be that hard.” He nodded and looked out the window. “Besides, working with you and Fred is fun.”

“That’s because you two like to gossip and talk about me behind my back,” he replied, smiling. She giggled and curled up against his side, resting her head on his shoulder. He began to slowly stroke her hair, enjoying the feeling of her silky locks sliding between his fingers.

“But you’re so fun to talk about,” she said, yawning. He kissed the top of her head softly.

“Want to go to sleep, kitten?” he asked, looking at her. She shook her head, sighing. “You seem tired.”

“I am, but I don’t want this moment to end yet,” she said, looking out the window. “And it’s still really early.”

“It’s been a long day, though,” he replied. “If you want to sleep, we can.”

“Are you going to let me sleep in here tonight?” she asked quietly, looking at him. He nodded and held her closer to him. “Do you ever think about that night, Spike?” He took a deep breath.

“All of the bloody time,” he answered. “I’ve blamed myself for it going wrong ever since.”

“I’m the one who told you to go- it’s my fault, not yours,” she said quietly, running her hand over his abs slowly.

“But I’m the one who came over in the first place,” he replied. “If I hadn’t come here that night-”

“We wouldn’t be where we are today,” she cut in, looking at him. “I doubt we’d be together.” He looked into her eyes. “And I know things in between then and now haven’t always been a hoot, but I think things are getting a lot better for us, don’t you?” He nodded, grazing her cheek. “I don’t regret that night. Maybe it shouldn’t have been after my mom’s funeral, but I’m happy it happened.” She sighed. “Maybe Mom’s death really did bring us together.”

“I think you’re right, pet,” he replied, kissing her softly. “I love you, Buffy.”

“I love you, too, William,” she said, slowly dozing off. “I’ll always love you."
 

Chapter 17: