Title: INTERCEPTION (1/1) by Bonnie
Author: Bonnie
Email: bondav40@yahoo.com
Rating: PG
Summary: After "Normal Again". Taking a different route than Joss's implosion.
Disclaimer: Based on characters not created by me.




"Life should have a soundtrack," Willow pondered aloud, as she sat rifling through pages of her textbook and drinking a second cup of coffee at the Magic Box.

"No! No more singing," Xander looked up wild-eyed from the shelf he was stocking.

"I don't mean like a musical. Just, you know, theme music kinda playing in the background to illustrate all the dramatic moments. It'd be real helpful to let you know when an evil thing is coming, and good for covering up all the slurpy sounds when you're smooching."

"Yeah, Will, that'd be great," her friend shook his head and went back to placing powdered dung beetle containers in an attractive display.

"Just a thought," the redhead twirled a lock of hair around her pencil and gazed off into space.

Anya cleared her throat and banged her ledger down on the counter, furiously adding up columns of figures. Willow's gaze bounced nervously between the former demon and Xander, who hadn't spoken since the wedding fiasco and Anya's return from wherever she had been. That is, the jilted bride hadn't spoken. Xander had tried and tried to get her to respond to his apologies, explanations, protests, and general ramblings, but she looked through him as if he wasn't there and went about her regular business of running the shop. He should really be at work on a construction site right now, but had stopped in to help out and hopefully wear down Anya's silence by his presence.

"It'd be nice," the Wiccan muttered half to herself. "If there was a reconciliation theme, you'd know when it was time to make up."

The door opened and Buffy was haloed by the morning sun as she entered the shop.

"Hey everybody! It's a gorgeous day. What's up?"

"Ah, the new and improved, non-brooding Buffy," Xander quipped.

"Yep, that's me. I'm in happy mode." the Slayer, smiled at all her friends fondly. "This is my life. I chose it."

Willow returned the smile. "That's good to hear. We were all worried about you for awhile there. Especially, with the knocking us unconscious and tying us up in your basement thing."

Buffy crossed to her friend and gave her a big hug. "I am so sorry. You have no idea. The...hallucination... or whatever it was seemed so real. I couldn't see my way clear..."

"It's okay. Just teasin' you a little 'cause I can." Willows eyes twinkled mischievously.

"Well, anyway, I'm sorry. Hey, Will, can I talk to you for a minute in private."

"Sure."

Buffy looked over at Anya, concentrating with feigned intensity on her numbers. "You too, Anya?" The girl looked up in surprise, a pleased smile at being included stealing across her face.

"Sure." She put down her calculator and followed the others to Buffy's former training room in the back of the shop, now used mostly for storage.

"Fine. Ladies only. I have got to get some guy friends. Once again, I miss Oz. I even miss Giles," Xander complained to himself, beginning to dust shelves filled with bottles of summoning charms and horned toad entrails.

In the back room, Willow and Anya sat down while Buffy paced nervously in front of them.

"Look. I'll tell you right now this is really embarrassing for me, but I've been keeping secrets and then feeling really bad about it, and I need to get this off my chest, and if I can't tell my friends and trust that they'll still like me, who can I tell, right?" Buffy burst out in a rush.

"Well, sure. You know you can tell me anything. You always could." Willow smiled helpfully.

"Okay, this is it then. O my god." She took a deep breath. "I've been seeing....I've been with....Spike." The other two girls regarded her blankly.

"Like, "with him" with him?" Willow asked and Buffy nodded looking back and forth between them as they exchanged a glance. "Uh, I think we already kind of figured that out, Buf."

"Huh?"

Anya picked up the ball, "It was pretty obvious you were up to something with someone, and unless it was the fry cook at Doublemeat Palace....Well, let's just say it was pretty obvious."

"It's okay. We figured you'd tell us when you were ready."

"So you've discussed me? How humiliating."

"No. No. It was just sort of...understood. You know, between Anya, Dawn and me. Not Xander though, guys don't...."

"Dawn knows!!!" Buffy wailed. "I've been agonizing about this huge secret and all of you already knew!"

"Suspected," Anya corrected and smiled brightly. "Don't worry, you did a great job of covering up, we're just all really clever."

"That's right," Willow chimed in. "Women can sense things."

"I can't believe this." Buffy sank down on the floor and put her head in her hands.

"So," Anya resumed, "how is he? Good I bet."

"Anya!" Willow scolded, but it was obvious her interest was piqued as well.

The Slayer looked up between her fingers, "Great, actually. Unbelievably great. But it's all over now so none of this matters anyway. I just wanted to tell you."

"Over?"

"After Riley came back and I saw what a real relationship he had, I knew I couldn't play house with Spike anymore. It was just pointless lust and sex and no good for either of us."

"The best kind," Anya interjected, "pointless lust and sex. No one gets left at the altar that way."

"Aw, hon," Willow put an arm around the ex-demon and hugged her, then she turned to Buffy. "You don't have to worry about what Dawn thinks. She figured it out before any of us. She was the first to know he had a crush on you and a blind person could see you wanted him too. It was really just a matter of time, wasn't it?"

"I guess I was the last to know," Buffy said ruefully.

"And Xander and Giles," Willow added. "But do they really need to know?"

"No. I just really need to tell it."

"Why? If you're done seeing him, I mean. Are you sure this affair is over? Cause it seems, from the way you've been acting, that it's a little more than lust."

Buffy jumped to her feet and headed for the door. "Nothing of the kind. I just wanted to get this off my chest and start with a clean slate. I'm sweeping all that Spike nonsense behind me. Over. Done."

Willow and Anya exchanged looks again and trailed after the still-babbling Buffy.

"Spike nonsense? What's this?" Xander asked, setting down his dust cloth.

"Just letting all my friends know, cause I trust that they love me and it won't change their opinion of me, that I had a fling with..."

"Spike? Oh my god!" Xander clutched his chest with one hand and steadied himself on the counter with the other. "What is it with you and the dead boys?"

"I knew he would be like this," Anya snapped, folding her arms across her chest.

Xander burst out laughing and the three girls stared at him in amazement.

"Just teasing!" he exclaimed. "Jeez, how stupid do you think I am? You think you chicks are the only ones who had a clue? I'm not blind. I can see young love when it's right in front of me."

"It wasn't love and.....you don't object?" Buffy asked faintly.

"Well of course I do, but what difference does it make? I've learned a lot about passing judgment since the days I used to ride you about Angel. You love who you love and there's nothing you can do about it, and it certainly isn't your friends' business to point out the flaws in your relationship." He looked pointedly at Anya and repeated softly. "You just love who you love."

She put a hand to her trembling lips and tears began to trickle down her face. "How could you do it, Xander? How could you leave me s-standing there like that? It was so cruel!"

"I'm sorry. How many more ways can I say it? I've looked at myself and realized I was just afraid and an idiot. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. We can go down to the courthouse and get married right now if that's what you want."

Anya shook her head, "No. That's all right. You're not ready yet. I can wait til you are. Just don't ever hurt me like that again!"

Xander opened his arms and she stepped into his embrace. He murmured endearments, stroking her hair and kissing her over and over as their tears mingled.

"I have to make a phone call," Willow sobbed.

"I have to get to work or I'll be fired," Buffy wept. And the last words she heard as she left were... "Tara? Baby, I love you! I'm so sorry about everything. I've been working really hard at keeping away from the majik. Ask Buffy and Dawn. Please let me see you again..."

********



"Welcome to Doublemeat Palace, can I take your order?" Buffy smiled grimly at the customer who was staring up at the menu as if he'd never seen one before. People were stacked up behind him and starting to grumble with annoyance.

Her eyes glazed over as she continued to serve customers but let her mind drift off.

Checklist for the new and improved Buffy: No more moping over the afterlife - she'd probably be there again soon enough. Check. No more secrets from Dawn and the Scoobies. Check. No more feeling sorry for herself for having this stupid job. Almost check. She could teach martial arts to kids or something. She liked kids and liked hitting things. It was the perfect job for her. She would energize herself to do something about that tomorrow. Check.

"Excuse me, young lady. My Spike?"

"Huh?"

"I said, my shake? You forgot it!" A frowning woman with a whiny kid waved a hand in front of Buffy's face. "Hello?"

"Uh, sorry," Buffy hurried over to the shake dispenser and zoned out again.

Spike. The last item on her checklist. What was he doing on the checklist? She had already taken care of that. She'd sent him packing, figuratively speaking. It was over between them so....Check.

"You want fries with that, sir?"

And why was his voice still in her head, that seductive growl that made everything he said sound sexy? "Slay-er." "Giles, make her stop." "I'm drowning in you, Summers." "Poor little lost girl." "I know I'm a monster, but you always treated me like a man." "A man can change."

Then her own voice, acid dripping from every word, rang through her head. "You're not a man, Spike. You're a....thing. A vile, disgusting thing."

"I love you, Buffy."

"You can't love. You have no soul."

Yet, who backed her in every fight? Who did she entrust Dawn to before her death? Who did she know would give her unquestioning loyalty and do whatever task she needed done? Who could she say absolutely anything to without fear of what he would think of her? Had she ever been that comfortable with Angel or Riley?

Who thought she was hot even in her polyester uniform, stinking of fried food? Who would shag her silly any time of the day or night that she asked for it, or would hold her quietly all night long if she said she wasn't in the mood?

"Miss! My change?" Buffy stared sightlessly at the red-faced man whose hand was stretched out in front of her. In a trance she removed her cow hat and handed it to him. "I'm sorry. I have to go," she murmured. She blindly walked through the restaurant.

"Buffy, where do you think you're going? You can't walk out like this again!" the manager's voice rose in anger behind her. "You won't have a job tomorrow!" he bellowed.

"Okay. Bye then," she said absently, pushing open the door.

********



"You're home early," Dawn remarked, when her sister entered the house. "I thought you were closing tonight?"

"Supposed to," Buffy said shortly, then looked her little sis straight in the eye. "Dawn, is it true that you already know I've been seeing Spike?"

"You've been seeing Spike!!" Dawn threw down the magazine she'd been looking at and jumped up to hug her. "I told them! I knew it. This is great! How long has it been going on? Is he as hot as he looks? Tell me everything. Does Willow know? Why didn't you tell me first? When did it happen? How did it happen? Share!"

"Awhile now. Yes he's hot. But it's over. Everyone seems to know. No, I didn't intend to tell you last it just happened that way. The details aren't your business. And how did you figure it out, anyway."

"Oh, come on Buffy. It's so obvious! When he looks at you and its all oohhh (she shivered) and you try and frown back but instead you look all ahhhh (she sighed). Anyone could guess you'd been humping like bunnies. So tell me more."

"Do you still stop and see him after school sometimes?" Buffy asked.

"I used to a lot at first. I really missed seeing him after you came back and kind of banished him from the house. He was so good to me while you were....dead. But lately, I've been busy after school. There's this boy, Dave, I told you about, and I like to go watch his soccer practice with Melanie and some of the others. So, no, I haven't visited Spike's for a couple weeks now. Why?"

"I just wondered."

"Come on. Why?"

Buffy sighed. "After Riley came back it made my little fling look so shabby. I quit seeing Spike. Told him I meant it this time and to keep away from me...and he has."

"You didn't! Are you crazy? If I had a guy that hot who wanted me...."

"Dawn! He's not a "guy". He's a souless vampire who will live virtually forever, never aging, never changing. Explain to me how that is going to work."

"Who cares!" Dawn exploded. "You worry so much about the future. You could be killed again tomorrow! He loves you, totally worships you, and you...no matter what you think....love him. You do! So go get him. Be with him as long as you can."

"I can't." Buffy said in a small voice.

"You can! And you want to or we wouldn't be having this conversation. What are you doing home from work so early for, anyway? Get yourself cleaned up and go over there." Dawn pushed her sister up the stairs toward the bathroom. "You shower. I'll pick out your outfit."

*******



Later, her hair blown dry, make up applied, and smelling sweet and flowery, Buffy stood in her bra and underwear considering several ensembles Dawn had laid out.

"Pick the white blouse," Dawn urged, "It looks pure and virginal. Men love that."

Buffy frowned at her sister, but tossed on the gauzy blouse and a light blue skirt. She put on her sandals then stood, hesitant, in front of the mirror, trying to think of something else to do to postpone this visit.

"I can't, Dawn. I just can't start this up again." Her eyes in the mirror were wide and frightened. "Because, this time, it means something more. It would be like saying..."

"That you love him, too?" Dawn hugged her sister and stroked her hair as Buffy had so often soothed her. "I told you, you do."

********



An hour later Buffy found herself hesitating again in front of Spike's crypt. She couldn't force her hand up to knock on the door - not that she had ever knocked before, and she hoped he would come bursting through on his way to his nightly prowl so she wouldn't have to take the initiative.

Finally, shivering with the cold breeze that blew up her skirt, she stepped forward and opened the door. All was quiet and dark inside. Great! He wasn't home. She turned on the light switch and in the glow cast by the dim, dusty bulb she could see the tomb was empty. Trashed and empty.

Though the grenade she had tossed to destroy the demon eggs had gone off down below, there was structural damage and broken stone on this level as well. But apart from the rubbish and decay, what struck Buffy was that all Spike's possessions were gone. Well, of course, he couldn't stay here with the place wrecked. He must have found somewhere else to live. Why hadn't she thought!

Then her eye caught a white envelope resting on top of an urn near the wall. Her stomach lurched in fear and her throat went dry. Her hands were shaking as she picked up the envelope, slit it, and began to read the note inside.

"Dear Buffy,

If you get this note, it means you actually came to see me again, which is good. If not, it will lay here til it disintegrates which would probably be better. I'm off to Mexico to get "dechipped". That's right. I know a guy who knows a guy....etc. And I'm guaranteed to come back as I was, in all my former glory. So, who knows, I'll either prove to you what I've told you all along, that I can control my urges even without this thing monitoring my behavior or I'll kick your skinny ass from here to Tuesday, rip out your beating heart and devour it in front of you. Either way, I'll be back. Or maybe not.
Still loving you,
Spike

Buffy took a great shuddering breath and slipped down to her knees, dropping the note, and covering her face with her hands. Too late, again! She felt the same panic and sense of dread she had felt racing to the helicopter pad as the bird lifted off and carried Riley out of her life. Why did she always recognize what she had when it was too late?

Huge sobs racked her body and she slid the rest of the way down onto the floor until she lay prostrate and grieving on the cold stone.

She had no idea how long she was there, and may have even slipped in and out of sleep, when she heard the crypt door open and footsteps enter. She pushed herself up from the floor, and crouched ready to spring into action, but a familiar mocking voice froze her in position.

"What's the matter, little girl, lost your doggie?" His mirthless chuckle sent a chill up her spine.

"Never had one," she responded. "On your way to Mexico, Spike? Or just coming back?"

"Naw, that fell through. Never could get together cash for the trip. I see you must have read my note, though."

"Yes. It was very...enlightening. 'Rip my heart out and eat it in front of me'? That's a sure way to win a girl's affections."

"What can I say. I was still a little miffed at you at the time."

Buffy rose to her feet and turned to face the blond vamp, whose soft expression belied the mocking tone of his words. She took a tentative step toward him and he backed a step away.

"You know, if you really wanted to get the chip de-activated I'm sure we could track down that tech-geek Warren. He's a whizz at that type of thing. Want to try it?"

Spike shook his head and looked away, scuffing his foot on the floor. "Guess not. I'm pretty used to the old thing. Think I'll just leave things the way they are."

Buffy took another step. "You afraid?"

"Me? Of what?"

"That you couldn't keep it together. That you'd go right back to being what you were before. Afraid to be the Big Bad again?"

Spike returned her gaze, eyes narrowed, jaw clenched. "Maybe," he admitted.

Buffy moved closer yet intimidating him with the nearness of her body. "Well, guess what? I believe in you." she whispered. "I think if you want to restrain yourself, chip or no chip, you can do it. I have faith in you. And do you know why?"

He shook his head in shock.

"Because I love you."

"Come again?"

"I love you."

Spike nodded slowly, pursing his lips, and studying her eyes. "This is a joke? A game?"

"Nope. I have faith in you because I love you."

"Could you repeat that last bit again?"

"I love you."

"That's what I thought you said." his lips twitched in amusement and tears filled his eyes. "So you would de-chip me and release me on an unsuspecting population because you...."

"Love you. That's right." She smiled wickedly back.

"And you might actually bring me around your friends and family once in awhile because..."

"I love you."

"With all this love, do you think there's any chance I could get your knickers off sometime soon and show you how much I love you back?"

"Could be." She twined her arms around his neck and let her hands play through his soft hair. He felt the heat of her body searing him and inciting him to action. Soon!

"Let's hear it one more time."

"I love you. I love Spike." She lifted her soft lips for a kiss and he devoured them greedily (better than a heart, he thought). After a few minutes of hungry passion, Spike pulled back and looked deeply into Buffy's eyes.

"I won't be perfect. You know that."

"No one is."

"Yeah, but I'll probably be less perfect than most people. It's hard to change."

"I'll help you."

"Will I come live with you and Dawn."

"Come today if you want."

"I want." He kissed her again, then paused. "Slayer, say the words again."

"I love you."

"Do you know how long I've wanted to hear you say that?"

"Oh, a couple of years." She smiled and snuggled into his chest, wrapping her arms around his narrow hips.

"Longer. Maybe not consciously, but I know I desired you since the first time I saw you. Why do you think I tried to kill you so hard? It's been very frustrating."

"Poor baby. Want me to make it up to you? I can think of several interesting ways."

Spike growled in anticipation. Cupping her buttocks, he drew her even closer to his rock hard bulge. "Show me."

She raised her face for another round of searing kisses and was gasping for breath by the time he pulled away. "But not here. Take me home." He planted one more little kiss on the tip of her nose.

"I'll take you home," she promised, leading him by the hand toward the door. "Oh, and Spike, one more thing....I love you."



END