Chapter Nine

"How did—I don't understand—" Spike was sputtering.

"I've surprised you."

"Bleeding right you have! How the hell do you know--?"
Tara took a deep breath. "I've always known what a Slayer is just as I've always known
vampires exist."

"But how?"

Tara took a deep breath. "It's not something I like to really talk about."

Spike cocked his head to the side. "I don't see that you have much of a
choice Tara. You've just approached me and told me that you're not only
the new Slayer, but that you know I'm a vampire. I think some answers are
in order here."

She was blushing furiously now and looked almost afraid.

"Tara," he began gently. "I'm sorry. It's just knowing what you know . . . "

"I know," she said softly. "Do you mind if we sit down?"

"Not at all." He followed her to the row of desks and chairs and positioned
themselves so they faced one another.

She took a deep breath, gripping her books on her lap and looked up at him
nervously.

"I was maybe ten and my parents, my best friend and I were walking home
from a movie. We didn't live very far away and I come from a good
neighborhood, so walking home was no big deal. I mean, I used to hang out
in the park all day. Well, that evening on our way home, we were
ambushed."

Spike stared at her. "Vampires," he guessed.

She nodded. "Yes," she whispered. She took a shaky breath. "My best
friend didn't make it. They took her first and then went after me."

"What happened?" Spike asked, horrified.

Tears started to trail down her cheeks. "A girl, or a woman, I'm not sure
which. . . when you're ten everyone looks big to you . . . she came out of
nowhere and saved us. She staked them. Told us not to be walking around after dark anymore. Until then I didn't even know vampires existed! Thought it was just made up stories meant to scare you! And then this all powerful girl comes along . . . she was amazing. She saved us and after that I went in search for what she was. There was no way an ordinary girl or woman could do what she did. I went hunting for her, for what she was and I found the answers scattered in different places. Books, the net . . . most of it was chalked up to untrue lore, but I knew. . . I saw her."

"And now you've become her," Spike said quietly.

"I only figured it out when I felt as if I were hit with something. My whole
body tingled and I felt this rush of power course through me. It was unlike
anything I'd ever felt before. It was . . . amazing! From what I'd read—I
knew that had to be it. I KNEW it."

"A Watcher? Don't you have a Watcher? All you birds have a Watcher."

Tara shrugged. "I don't know what happened. I don't seem to have one."

Spike's eyes widened. "Who's been training you?

"No one, but myself. Well, I've had some help."

"Who?" he asked incredulously.

"My friend Willow."


 

Chapter 9b


She hated the fact that she missed Spike when he was working. She felt pathetic. She did plenty fine before Spike. Yeah. She was, what, seventeen? How much of a life could you have before you could even drive? Well, she'd done well for herself after he'd come along. She frowned. Okay, so a lot of that time was spent with him. Except for when she took off to England for a year without him. She made it in a whole other country without him. Funny how she never connected how England was his country until now. When she was restless and lonely. She'd visited her mom earlier that day and Giles was at some sort of High Priest meeting. There was nothing on TV, not even reruns of Friends were grabbing her tonight. Probably because when she would watch that, it was with Spike.

What she needed was a down and dirty patrol. The kind she used to have. A really strong vampire coming along that would challenge her and mistake her for the Slayer – again. He'd throw a punch to her face and she'd duck it just in time meanwhile bending her knees low and swiping his legs out from under him. He'd lay there, struggling to get up just as she'd come at him with a stake and oh! Then his friends would show up! They'd charge her and . . . what would she do? Would she employ a ball of light at them, or maybe throw them back with a burst of energy or no, maybe use a burst of energy on one and pummel the other one with a roundhouse kick sending it back –

"Buffy, what are you thinking about?"

She'd been so absorbed in her fantasy she hadn't noticed Spike – the one
that had sparked this train of thought – come home.

"Huh?" she asked innocently.

"You had a big grin on your face, what were you thinking about? Me?"

"Of course!" No, I was thinking of fighting. Course then I could cap it off by
having sex with you after—

Coming over to her, he leaned down, hovering over her, going for a kiss.

She caught a whiff of something sour on him, something that had her
wrinkling her nose and pushing him away.

"What did you do that for?" he asked, stunned.

"You stink."

He sniffed around himself. "I don't stink!"

"You do. It's like you're covered in something. Did you come across a nasty
demon tonight?"

Now he looked hesitant which immediately had Buffy on alert. "All right fess up. I know that look. What's going on?"

Taking a deep unneeded breath, Spike sat down across from her.

Wrinkling her nose at him, she scooted to the other side of the room, rolling
the chair away from him.

"Buffy, I don't smell!" he exclaimed.

"Yes, you do."

"I'll go take a shower and then –"

"No, you're going to talk now. You made that ‘I just did something you're
not going to like' face."

"You should know that face pretty well considering you've made it yourself
enough. And, no, I didn't DO anything."

She gave him a look and crossed her arms, waiting.

"One of my students – my best student actually. Really bright girl. Shy,
sweet, unassuming. She blushes when I so much as call on her to answer a
question."

It was innocent really. A teacher talking about his student and beaming
about the fact that he had a really good one. It was normal right? Normal to
talk about a student so glowingly . . . that was normal right?

"Aren't there any male students that um, are really good?"

"Not really many men in the class, no. Why?" he looked at her
questioningly.

"No reason. Continue."

"Pet, I don't know how to come out and say this without well, just coming
out and saying it."

"So say it already."

"She approached me after class . . . "

Buffy's heart started to thump hard in her chest and she suddenly found it
hard to breathe. What the hell was he going to say and why was he
stalling!?

"Your heart is racing. Are you all right?"

"What the fuck happened Spike?" she barked at him, unable to contain her
growing agitation any longer.

"You don't think that – Buffy how could you—"

"If you don't tell me what happened, I'm going to castrate you," she told
him deeply and darkly.

"She's the Slayer. And, she knew I was a vampire."

Buffy sat motionless, staring at him, trying to process what he was saying
to her and not really succeeding. "She what?" she asked after a while.

"She's the Slayer and she knows I'm a vampire," he sighed again. "Seems
she knows about you too."

"How? Did you tell her?" she asked accusingly.

"Of course I bloody didn't! She knew because. . . well, because . . ."

"I swear to God," Buffy started warningly.

"She's a friend of Willow's."

Buffy jumped up from her seat. "Well. Isn't that a convenient? Quite a
coincidence, don't you think? That lying little…witch!"

"Buffy, you're a witch too."

She shot him a scathing look and he clamped his mouth shut.

"She lied to me. She lied to Giles! Giles! I mean, I've lied to Giles before,
but it's ME. I'm allowed. She barely knows him, she doesn't know how to
work him like I do—"

Spike raised an eyebrow.

"Get your mind out of the gutter," she snapped. "What the hell is going on?
Something fishy is going on here. Something . . . " she neared Spike and
wrinkled her nose. "Stinks," she finished.

"It's not AS covert op as you're making it sound pet."

"Oh?"

"Willow knew of us before Tara came into her life. When Tara was ‘called',
she told Willow, Willow helped her out but soon realized that she needed
more help than she could give her and so, she went to Giles. Not only to
gain Giles' help but he knew that you studied under him. She was hoping
that you – we – could help her out."

"She doesn't have a Watcher?"

"Apparently they seemed to have missed the boat on this one."

"And she just decided to share with Willow what she was. I assumed part
of being the Slayer was going incognito. No one was supposed to know
about you. You taught me that."

Spike ran a hand through his hair. "Well, everyone's different I imagine
pet. Her and the Willow bird are best friends. Have been for a while from
what I gather. She trusted her enough to tell her, figuring she could help
since she knew magic—"

"Willow told me that she didn't realize she had power until she was
attacked by a vampire. She lied. She knew before. She just used Giles to get
to me and you."

"I know. Tara apologized for that. She really didn't know of any other way
to be able to talk to us."

"So let me get this straight. Willow knew of us before Tara was called.
Then Tara gets called and Willow figures she needs the help of us to help
Tara out because as it turns out the Council somehow missed the boat on
sending her a Watcher. So, she lied to Giles, and she lied to me. She was
using us to help out her friend."

Spike had the decency to look sheepish. "Well when you put it that way. . .
but pet, the girl didn't have anyone. Put us in that situation. I would have
done it to help you any way I could."

Buffy rolled her eyes, "well when you put it that way . . . "

"In the grand scheme of things it was a little white lie. And, according to
Tara, Willow had power, but didn't realize just how much until she fried the
vamp to a crisp. So, yeah, she might have kept a sliver of the truth out, but
the truth is still there."

"If you choose to see it," Buffy muttered, sitting down.

"And Tara apologized."

Buffy looked at him. "Oh Tara apologized, did she? I feel much better now
thanks."

Now Spike gave her a look.

"So. Now what?"

"Now we see them tomorrow. Willow has a meeting with Giles tomorrow
evening already and I've asked Tara to join her. I told her we'd come over
so we could all talk and meet."

This was still niggling at her, just scratching at her skin, making her
uncomfortable. Aside from the fib Willow told and how Tara just popped up
out of nowhere, she couldn't pinpoint it.

"How did she know she was a Slayer if she didn't have a Watcher to guide
her?"

Spike relayed the story Tara told him.

Buffy had the good sense to not speak what she was thinking: What is she
Batman? What is that? Sob story of Slayer to be? Yet again another
coincidence. She witnesses a Slayer and then one day she is the Slayer.

"Horrible thing to have happen to a little girl, right?" Spike asked,
mistaking Buffy's frown for one of sympathy.

"Yeah," Buffy nodded slowly.

Silence fell. Shaking his head, almost vigorously, Spike jumped up. Before
she could question what that was about he was speaking. "Enough of that. I
want my kiss." Grabbing her hand, he hauled her up against him, gently,
and kissed her soundly. "I love my girl so much," he purred and nuzzled
her neck. Placing a hand on her tummy he looked down at her tenderly,
"how's my baby?" And then went back to kissing her. Somewhere in the
back of her mind, Buffy noted the sour scent on him had disappeared.
 

Chapter Ten


"Buffy you don't have to look as if you're going to skin them alive," Spike told her as they made their way to Giles'.

Buffy ignored him. She was angry with them and she intended to stay that way. And, if she was totally honest, she was a bit peeved at Spike. Along with not understanding where her usually observant and cut-through-the-bullshit Spike was. Something about Tara's story wasn't adding up, it sounded so . . . fake and fairy tale like. Why wasn't Spike, who was usually the first to catch on to these things, catching on this time? Then there was the jealousy factor she was grappling with. Jealousy over how Spike worried about Tara. She told herself it was because Spike was a kind and gentle man that felt somehow obligated to Tara because she was his student and he had somewhat of a relationship with her. Besides, he had been brought to her by Whistler for the reason that she wasn't a Slayer and therefore had no Watcher. And for some reason, Tara had no Watcher. So, Spike was probably feeling responsible in that aspect too. The only thing about that, that kept niggling in the back of her mind was that Spike had fallen in love with Buffy. Would he fall for Tara too? She rolled her eyes; she really needed to stop following that train of thought. Jealousy didn't get anyone anywhere. She looked over at Spike, eyeing him. He looked over at her and grinned and took her hand in his, kissing the back of her hand. Yep, definitely jealous for no reason.

Entering Giles', Buffy felt her guard go up immediately all over again. She found Giles making tea and Willow and the woman who must be Tara with their heads bent in conversation. Willow was glowing and Buffy cocked her head to the side. She remembered that Willow had mentioned a girlfriend. Was Tara it? She frowned, but Spike said that Tara specifically told him that Willow was a friend. The way Willow was looking at her and the way Tara's head bent in to her . . . Was there something going on? Could it be that Tara was gay too and just didn't want to say? God, that'd be a load off.

"Buffy, Spike! Do come in," Giles emerged from the kitchen area. "I trust all is well?" he looked pointedly at the couple.

"Nothing's changed," Buffy informed him. It hit Buffy suddenly. The same sour scent she swore Spike had last night when he came home. She sniffed the air.

"Buffy?" Giles was looking at her oddly.

"Do you smell something? Something sour?" Buffy asked, still sniffing and trying to get a handle on where it was coming from.

"Oh, oh! I've heard of this. Enhanced smell. Pregnant women get that all the time," Willow chipped in. Then she too sniffed the air. "Though I don't smell anything."

Buffy knitted her brows. She looked up at Giles, asking him with her eyes if this was part of her possible immortality. He shook his head and shrugged in response, then took off his glasses and started to clean them.

"Hi Buffy," Tara said, coming forward to stand in front of her.

Buffy quirked an eyebrow. "Hi."

Tara held out her hand. "It's nice to meet you."

Buffy looked at the proffered hand and then back up at Tara.

"Buffy," Spike urged, half reprimanding.

Now she was definitely annoyed. She didn't need to be scolded like some errant child.
She hastily took Tara's clammy hand. She had the urge to drop it and ended the handshake
quickly, resisting the urge to wipe her hand on her pants. With her ‘clean' hand, she placed it
on her stomach.

"Did you tell Giles?" she asked pointedly.

Tara nodded, "we did."

"So is everything out in the open now or are there any more secrets and lies you're
both keeping from us?" Buffy asked.

Willow gasped and Tara visibly shook under the harsh words.

"Buffy!" Giles and Spike burst out.

She looked up at their disapproving looks and her jaw set.

"We were trying to figure out why a Watcher was not here at the appropriate time,"
Giles started, trying to break up the tension a bit by talking shop.

"Yeah, that is a bit of odd isn't it?" Buffy said, looking directly at Tara. "How old are
you?"

"Twenty."

"Little old for a Slayer."

Tara was wringing her hands. "I—I uh, I d-don't r-really know about that."

"You said you studied Slayers. Surely you read that Slayers are usually called early in
life. Not a large life span those Slayers."

"Buffy!" Spike shouted. "What in the bleeding hell has gotten in you?"

"Me? Am I the ONLY one here that thinks to ask the important questions? She just fell
out of the sky! And it just so HAPPENS that this one—" she gestured to Willow "Knows all
about us." She focused her scathing glare on Willow. "You lied to us. You USED Giles."

Willow looked fearfully at Buffy. "Buffy, I'm sorry. I really did need Giles' help. I knew he was a High Priest, the best in the community. I needed help because what I did—I didn't
make that up. Like I told you before, I did see you and Spike fighting vamps before. I never
told a single soul. When Tara was called I had to help her. She doesn't have a Watcher, well, yet that we know of. I couldn't leave her to die. You'd do the same for someone you loved wouldn't you? It wasn't like I could just come at you and spring it on you. I went about it the wrong way and I apologize. I'm sorry, I truly am." Her explanation and apology was earnest. Earnest enough to make Buffy almost rethink her stance on them. Almost. She opened her mouth to speak when a wave of nausea hit her and her head started to hurt. She pressed a hand to her forehead and squeezed her eyes shut.

"Buffy, baby, you all right?" Spike asked, taking her hand and tilting her head up to look at him. He was studying her face.

"I'm not –" Swallowing hard, she rushed to the bathroom where she emptied the
contents of her dinner. Breaking out in a cold sweat, she braced herself against the wall with
one arm.

"Pet? What's going on? You never had morning sickness before…"

"Guess its decided to make a late appearance," she mumbled.

Wetting a washcloth, Spike pressed the cool cloth to the back of her neck. "Think it's a
sign."

"Of?"

He smirked at her. "To be nicer and give Willow and Tara a chance?"

Yanking the cloth from his hand, she threw it in the sink and glared at him. "I want to
go home now."

His jaw was clenching, but he nodded curtly. She figured if she hadn't just been sick,
he would have had a few words to share. Striding ahead of him, she told Giles she was
leaving.

"You feeling all right?" he asked concerned.

"No. God, it stinks in here!" she exclaimed and burst out the door, gasping in the fresh
air, filled her lungs with it.

She made her way to the car and climbed in, resting her head against the car window.
Spike joined her a few minutes later.

He didn't say a word until they'd reached their apartment and the sour stench following
them, along with Buffy's sickness had disappeared.

 

Chapter Eleven

"I'm going to help her train, Buffy," Spike said as he put the car in park and cut the engine.

She turned to him. "You're WHAT?"

"I'm going to help her Buffy. I can't not help her. She'll get herself killed."

Buffy climbed out of the car and slammed the car door shut, trying to hold
back the strength she could feel coursing through her. Spike was on her
heels, following her up the stairs.

"Buffy, let's talk this out."

She marched to the bathroom to run a bath. She was so angry at Spike she
was shaking and feeling very near tears. She didn't get Spike, she didn't get
Giles and she did NOT like Tara. She was still on the fence about Willow.

"Pet, please talk to me," he said standing in the doorway. She turned to
face him.

"What are thinking?"

"I'm thinking that she's vulnerable not only being the Slayer but not
having a Watcher to help her. She needs our help."

"She needs our help. . . " Buffy muttered on a bitter chuckle. "She witnesses
her best friend get killed by a vampire when she's ten and then witnesses a
Slayer coming to save her and her family just in the nick of time. You're
telling me she never learned after that how to defend herself against
vampires? She's been a Slayer how long? Oh wait, I never got to ask that
because I was too busy being scolded like a child!"

"Buffy, I'm sorry—"

"I don't want to hear it! You're supposed to be my husband, my mate and
my best friend Spike. You didn't treat me like any of those things. You
humiliated me in front of them. Made me look like I was just some kind of
bitch."

"Pet I'm—"

"If you say I'm sorry I won't be responsible for my actions," she hissed.

"Buffy, you fought your first demon when you were sixteen. Whistler came
along and helped you until I came along. Do you know that it scares me to
think of you fighting demons at such an early age? If Whistler hadn't been
there and if I hadn't. . . Buffy, I don't want the same end to happen to Tara
that could have happened to you. When I see her, I see you. I see you
young and alone and without anyone there to have your back."

"She's twenty. She's not that young."

Spike ran his hand through his hair, frustrated. "What is your beef with
her? What is it that you don't like? Is it because you're jealous?"

"I don't trust her!"

"Why?" he burst out, "tell me Buffy, why?"

"She lied to us!"

"Buffy . . . you are hardly one to throw stones about lying. You lied to me
for a fucking year when you took off to England! And you kept this dream
from me for over a month! All she did was keep a shade of the truth out –"

"A shade that could have put us in danger. Once every vamp in the place
gets wind that she's the Slayer, all of us who associated with her are in
danger! Including your baby."

"OUR baby."

"Then act like a goddamn father and ask the right questions."

That was the wrong thing to say and Buffy knew it the minute it flew out of
her mouth. Spike's jaw started twitching and his fists were balled up at his
sides. Without a word, he spun around and stormed away. Buffy stood
there, unable to bring herself to go after him even though she knew she
should. It didn't matter because a minute later, the door slammed shut.



Her body was tired, but her mind was racing. She laid there, waiting for
Spike to return and worrying about what kind of trouble he was getting
himself into. She knew he had to be drinking. She just hoped he wasn't
planning on patrolling and fighting. Needless to say it had her worried. So
worried, that she shot out of bed in the next instant as images of Spike
fighting drunk and getting seriously injured or staked passed through her
mind. Pulling on her maternity jeans and a shirt, she slipped on her shoes
and headed for the door. Flipping open the door, Spike nearly fell through
it.

"Bloody ‘ell!" he sputtered and caught himself.

She wrinkled her nose as the scent of whiskey drifted from him.

"Where are you going?" Spike drawled as he propped himself up against
the wall.

"I was going out to look for you," she told him.

"No you're not Goldilocks."

"Well, not now. You're right here."

He shook his head. "You're not allowed to go out there no matter what," he
pointed at her, swaying in front of her. "I take care of what's mine and you
are mine. You and the baby. I know how to be a goddamned father and a
good one! I wouldn't ever let anything hurt you."

"Spike, I want to have this conversation with you, but now when you're
like this. Just rest your drunken mind that I didn't mean it and I'm sorry."

"Sorry," he snorted. "Sorry ain't gonna cut what you said to me." He
pressed a hand over his heart. "That hurt Buffy. You sayin' I would ever
put the baby in danger? Or you? I couldn't . . . " his eyes welled up in tears.
"How could you think it?"

It wasn't often that Spike cried when drunk. It was unnerving. Moving
towards him, she wrapped an arm around his waist. "Come on Big Bad, let's
get you in a nice shower and then into bed okay?"

He allowed her to drag him to the bathroom. She turned the spray on and
helped him undress. Tears flowed, but he wasn't making a sound otherwise.
When he was naked – and now hard – he pulled her so that she was flush
against his front. "Come with me," he murmured huskily, nuzzling her neck.


The temptation to follow him into the shower was almost overwhelming.
She stared up at him. At his sad eyes with anger lurking just below the
surface. Anger at her. She knew also that as happy as she was to have him
safe and at home, sex wasn't going to solve the discord between them. They'd both been hurtful and what he was offering wouldn't assuage the anger. She refused to have that be the way they communicated. She also didn't want sex to toss what happened earlier under the rug.

"No baby," she told him gently. "I'll sit on the can and wait for you okay?"

"You don't love me anymore," he whimpered, burying his face further in
her neck and clutching her closer.

Why had she been jealous of Tara again exactly? Standing there with his
erection pressed against her stomach and his face buried in her neck with
tears soaking her shirt, she suddenly felt silly for thinking Spike felt
something other than ‘duty' for Tara.

"I love you Spike. I love you more than anything."

"Do you forgive me?" he asked, popping his head up to look at her.

"Yes, but we'll still need to talk."

He nodded.

"Can you forgive me?"

He nodded again.

"I'll ask again when you're sober. In you go," and she helped him into the
shower. Sitting on the toilet, she buried her head in her hands, suddenly
exhausted. She blamed Tara for this. It was just yet another strike against
the mysterious girl.




 

Chapter Twelve

Not surprisingly, Buffy awoke before Spike. Somehow she managed to free herself from his grasp and crawl out of bed. She had a wicked thirst for blood that morning. She'd had a craving for it after the accidental blood drinking incident, but had ignored it. This morning however, she couldn't. It didn't even turn her stomach the way she thought it would to prepare it. And as she took long gulps of it, she felt satisfied in the fact that obviously the baby needed it. She sighed heavily as she sat down at the kitchen table and tried to figure out exactly what the hell was going on. Not just with her, but with Spike and Giles as well. The two men that had taught her everything she knew about Slayers and vampires were blatantly ignoring all the weirdness that was Tara popping into their lives like that. Okay, so yes, Slayers were all over and it all depended on when they were called. So, maybe the Slayer before Tara had died later, thereby causing Tara to be called later than most Slayers were. Okay, that was a rational explanation. But Buffy wanted confirmation on it. She wanted to know who the last Slayer was and when she died. And weren't all Slayers equipped with Watchers at the point of call? Why was Tara without a Watcher? The innocent little girl act wasn't flying with Buffy. She couldn't explain it, but there was something so off with Tara it ate at her. Why wasn't anyone else—namely Giles and Spike – catching on to that? They were usually incredible judges of character and it was as if they were blindsided. Buffy sat upright, realization hitting her. Yes, blindsided. That's it exactly. Something had to be making them act that way. Something about Tara. Surely they couldn't be that taken by her helpless act—could they? The question was, where to start?

Willow, that's where.

The girl had to know things. Spike said they'd been friends. Well, that was according to what Tara had told him. Willow had claimed to have a girlfriend. And the way their heads had been bent in conversation yesterday, had signaled closeness that was more than just friendly.

Making her way to the bathroom, Buffy cleaned herself up quickly and changed. Scrawling a quick note to Spike that she'd gone out for a bit, she headed on her way out. She was going to pay Willow a visit.


Finding the girl proved to more difficult than she had thought. Giles had been hesitant to release the information to her, admonishing her instead for her behavior the night before. Buffy thought it best to go in one ear and out the other. She wasn't going to get into it with Giles too. She had enough problems with Spike at home to tend to. When Buffy stated that she merely wanted a chance to apologize to Willow and maybe since Spike was going to patrol with Tara, she could work magic with Willow—he'd relented in a big way and gave her Willow's address.

Knocking on Willow's door, Buffy had a brief feeling of guilt wash over her. She was no better than they were at lying, really. She placed her hand over her stomach and told herself that it was for a good reason. She was protecting her family by getting to the bottom of the mystery.

"Buffy!" Willow exclaimed, surprised.

"I need to talk to you. Is this a bad time?"

Willow stared at her in disbelief. "You need to talk to me?"

"Yes. Do you mind if we went to the park or something to talk?" The idea of being some place where Tara might have inhabited made her sick to her stomach.

"Uh, yeah. Let me just grab my purse."

Willow joined her a minute later and smiled sheepishly at Buffy. "I'm surprised to see you."

"I can imagine your surprise. I haven't been exactly welcoming to you."

Willow looked down, "I don't blame you Buffy. I really don't. I mean, you were right last night. I did lie to Giles and you. I just didn't know what else to do and Tara was insistent about it . . . I think she's really scared about being a Slayer."

"Is she?" That doesn't exactly jive with what Spike told her.

"Yeah, I mean it's a lot of responsibility. But you should know about that huh?"

"I'm not a Slayer."

"But you have the powers – and then some – of one. You still fight."

Buffy looked down at and away as they walked. "I haven't been able to fight lately."

"As well you shouldn't. You're pregnant. How is it that you became pregnant by a vampire anyway? I thought you know, their boys didn't swim."

"Your guess is as good as mine, Willow."

"Spike seems like a really great vampire—guy—what should I call him?"

Buffy smiled, "Guy. He prefers guy. Depending on my mood, I prefer guy too. Makes him feel good."

"Tara used to go on and on about what a great professor he was and how smart. Not to mention how handsome."

Buffy nodded slowly. Willow was trying to talk Tara up, that much was clear. Trying to make Buffy like her. Little did Willow know however that what she was doing was digging Tara's grave.
"So, um, how does your girlfriend feel about all the help you've been giving Tara? I mean, you've been extremely helpful to her lately. Above and beyond with all the patrolling and training. I think I'd be jealous."

Willow fell silent. "I don't think I have a girlfriend anymore," she said glumly.

"I'm sorry. Was it because of Tara?"

"No, well . . . yeah. Tara was my girlfriend Buffy."

She knew it! She felt like yelling she knew it at Willow, but instead stopped and gazed imploringly at Willow. "What happened? You're not together anymore? I know that if Tara is scared about being the Slayer it could just be that she's also afraid that you'll get hurt. Get caught in the crossfire and all that stuff. I had to separate my friends very much so from my work. They still don't know. Well, they have an inkling, but I've never elaborated on it. Usually Slayers don't have much in the way of friends and lovers." She was getting really good at bullshitting; she wanted to pat herself on the back for it.

"Do you think that could be it?" Willow asked hopefully. She looked so sad that Buffy was getting the distinct feeling that Willow really was an innocent in all this. "She changed ever since she was called."

"How was she called without a Watcher? It just doesn't make sense to me. It's actually worrisome that she doesn't have one." Don't lay it on too thick, Buffy.

"She just knew. She was at my door step one day telling me she was the Slayer. I didn't know anything about it and then she told me about when she was little, but. . . I thought I knew everything about her!" Willow was unloading, a dam had broken inside her and she was letting it all out. "We'd been together for over a year. You figure after all that time, you know a person. I mean, she knew all about me being a witch. But she never told me that story about her best friend or knowing about Slayers. And then one day, there she is on my doorstep telling me she's a Slayer and blabbing this horrific story to me about what she witnessed. It was overwhelming to take all in. I was worried, because, well, I love her and I didn't know what I could do to help. She told me I must know someone that could help her; that could help us. She cried and told me she didn't want to die. So of course I had to tell her about you and Spike and Giles. She begged me to go to Giles and get some help. I was so scared for her Buffy, so that's what I did." Tears streamed down her cheeks now. "I probably should have just gone to see you first, but I was sure you'd think I was a lunatic and turn me away. I'm sorry, Buffy. I didn't mean to use you and Giles that way. She was just so insistent. . . Then when Spike started teaching at the school, she took his class."

"Did she know who he was? Had she seen us?"

"Not that I know of, no. She is a lit major, though I thought she'd already taken that class. . . She came home and told me that she'd met Spike." She stopped and wiped away some tears. "Ever since then, she'd been pulling back from me. I just don't know what to do Buffy. She runs hot and cold so often. . . she loves me and then she backs off. I love her so much and when she's there I can't deny her . . . I don't know what to do," Willow said so helplessly Buffy felt sorry for the girl. The wheels were turning in Buffy's mind. Things were clicking into place.

"Willow, do you know if Tara grew up around here?"

"She grew up in Salem, actually."

Buffy looked down at her watch. It was still early enough for her to take a bus to Salem. Spike was probably going to be nursing his hangover. . . a trip into Salem would take a while though. No, she'd go home first to Spike and then continue her investigation tomorrow. Giving Willow a huge hug, she offered to buy the distraught girl some lunch.



 

Chapter 13

Checking her watch, she figured Spike was probably not only up –and had been up for a while – but probably wondering where the hell she was. He'd probably take it as her still being pissed at him and ‘punishing' him by leaving him. However, she wasn't sure how he was going to take the news of where she'd been. And while she knew that she had to be honest – SHOULD be honest, a large part of her wanted to keep quiet until she had tangible information. She catalogued in her mind what she'd learned and while it was all fishy and validated the fact that she felt Tara was off, she wasn't sure if Spike would see it that way. He'd think she was just being hormonal and territorial. Bitchy.

The thought actually angered her. She looked down at her arms, at the scars Drusilla had left the last time Buffy had a bad feeling. Those scars told her she wasn't wrong. They also told her she needed to be up front and honest with Spike. She had a family to save.

"Where were you?" he asked as soon as she entered the apartment.

He was standing with his back to her, fixing some blood. He appeared to have just showered as his hair was wet. He was barefoot with his usual jeans on and when he walked over to the microwave, she noticed his black shirt was hanging open.

She didn't expect him to be so direct right away and had to take a minute to gather her thoughts. "I didn't expect that right away," she told him honestly.

He looked over his shoulder. "Oh? Had to think of a lie then?"

She pursed her lips together. This was a far cry from the Spike that had
wept in her arms last night. "You know it's funny. When I keep secrets, I
get your attitude. When I tell you the truth, I get attitude too. So you tell
me Spike, what should I do? Cause I'll do it. Pick a side and stick to it."

She saw his shoulders slack and slouch. He turned to her, "I'm sorry.
Again." He scratched the back of his head, "When I woke up and you were
gone . . . . I assumed you were still mad at me and didn't want to be around
me. Coupled with the headache and feeling like I'd been hit by a truck…"

She cocked her head to the side. "Any better?"

He nodded. "Now that you're home, yes."

"Don't break out the happiness just yet," she said hesitantly.

Taking his mug out of the microwave, he sipped it and regarded her
curiously. "Oh?"

"I went to go see Willow," and she winced, waiting for the yelling.

He nodded slowly, thoughtfully. "And?"

"And I learned some interesting things about your girl."

His expression darkened. "She's not my girl Buffy. You're my girl."

"From the way you defended her last night, I wasn't sure anymore."

"How can you say that to me? How can you think that? Buffy . . . You're
my world. You're everything to me. You and the baby are all that matters."

"Then I don't want you spending any time with Tara," she told him firmly.

"She's in my class, Buffy."

"And that's it. I don't want you to spend any time beyond that with her."

He cocked his head to the side. "What did you find out Buffy?"

"Well, I found out that she goes and on about you all the time."

"Can you blame her pet?" he smirked.

She shot him a glare. "Not now," she snapped.

He put his mug down and started for her. "Pet, I was kidding, trying to
lighten the mood. Come here –" and he reached for her.

She backed away, "no. We're doing this. We're talking. You want honesty,
then you're getting it. Laid right out on the table for you. No jokes, no
holding back. Can you handle it? Can you handle All Honest Buffy?"

His jaw clenched and he stood tall. "Give it to me."

"All right. I think Tara's a liar. I think something's going on with her and I
think that whatever it is, it has to do with you. Did Tara tell you that Willow
and her were dating?"

Spike's eyes widened.

"Exactly. She's gay Spike. Or at least she was. Willow said she changed
after she was ‘chosen'. She said she stepped back from her and now blows
hot and cold with her. Willow has a hard time saying no to her which is why
she sought us out when Tara pleaded with her that she must know
someone that could help her. Funny that, don't you think? Almost like Tara
knew of us, but didn't know how to get to us and used Willow as her ‘in'.
Tried to make it innocent and all in the name of helping a friend and
keeping the Slayer thing on the down low, but it's fishy to me just the same.
Especially since before Willow could meet you, Tara was taking your class
and already approached you. Almost like she just couldn't wait."

"For?"

"That's where I'm lost. And something struck me when Willow said that
she had a hard time saying no to her. . ." Buffy started pacing.

"Like?"

"The way you and Giles are in her presence. How you just can't say no to
her, the way you rush to her defense."

"I told you pet, it's got nothing to do with me having a thing for her! It has
everything to do with not wanting her to die. The way you could have.
Wouldn't be able to live with myself if I could have helped someone and
didn't. What if I…what if I hadn't helped you?" he finished on a whisper.

"And I'm telling you that she's up to something. How funny is it that she
doesn't have a Watcher still. She's been a Slayer for some time now and still
no Watcher? The Council may be made up of a bunch of ‘wankers', but from
what you've told me, they're efficient when it comes to duty. You'd think
they'd be all over their only Slayer at the moment. And yet they're not."

"Coincedence?"

"That's just it. Too many things are coincidental and so fake sounding.
Everything she's told us sounds like a made up fairy tale."

"If you call slaying demons and vamps that could kill you a fairy tale,"
Spike said dryly. He looked up at her and spoke again before she could
respond. "But I know what you mean."

"Do you?"

He met her eyes and said seriously, "Yes. Buffy, if you don't want me to
help her, then I won't."

"Do you believe me though? Do you see what I'm seeing?"

"Yes, pet."

"But you still need proof, right?"

"Don't you?"

"Yes. And I'm going to get it."


"How?"

"Short of confronting her? I don't know yet. But I will find a way."

"Can I hold you now baby? I really need my girl in my arms now."

She gave him a weak smile and allowed him to engulf her in his arms. She
hugged him back and inhaled his soapy scent, stopping when she could
trace just the slightest scent of something sour on him.

What the hell was it? And why did she keep on smelling it?


 

Chapter 14:

Spike wasn't pleased with her. Truthfully, she didn't really care. What she was doing she was doing for their family. And since Spike usually trusted her instincts – especially when she was this adamant about them – and now he was second guessing her, it only confirmed to her that something was up. She could easily point the finger at Tara since all of their discord had come the moment she arrived, however beyond that, she couldn't point to any concrete proof. How do you explain to someone that it's possible they could be under some kind of spell whilst under the spell? Especially when it was just hypothetical at this point.

And so, she made her way to back of the classroom, willing to blend into the corner and let Spike do his thing. Besides, she'd been wanting to see her sexy husband teach anyway. She was hoping it would have been under better circumstanced –namely when he wasn't so angry with her—but she had stood firm.

"You don't trust me!" he accused.

"I do trust you. I don't trust her."

That wasn't enough for Spike. Her insistence of being there at his class so Tara didn't have a chance alone with him, spoke volumes to Spike of her mistrust for him. She hoped one day he'd understand that she truly did trust him. Trust for them had been a bumpy and long, winding road so for him to even suggest she didn't trust him was laughable at best.

Their eyes met across the room as it began to fill up and Buffy tried to smile encouragingly at him. The corner of his mouth turned up, in an attempt of a smile, then he focused back on his task.

Buffy could pinpoint the moment Tara entered the room for a few different reasons. For one, the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end, second, Spike's attention immediately darted toward the girl and his smile was easy for her as it had not been for Buffy. Thirdly, the smell. Yes, the sour smell was beginning to permeate the room. Buffy glanced around, noting no one seemed to notice it. On their way to class earlier Buffy had used the silence Spike was treating her to catalogue her observations and hunches on Tara. Willow's claim that she was unable to deny Tara anything – as Spike and Giles seemed unable to deny her anything as well – sparked Buffy's memories of the first night Spike had met Tara and had come home smelling sour. Then, she'd smelt it the night she met Tara. Along with a feeling of nausea that had her throwing up her dinner in Giles' bathroom. Then this afternoon she'd smelt it on him – a trace of it so faint that if she hadn't been in his arms, she never would have noticed. Whatever the sour scent was, it trailed them and its intensity heightened and lessened seemingly due the proximity of Tara. That was Buffy's hypothesis anyway. Since no one else smelled it, she was sure that was going to be damn near impossible to prove.

The look of shock, and then disappointment, in seeing Buffy almost had Buffy grinning at the girl. In fact, she couldn't help letting a little smirk escape. She felt like shouting "Take that!" to her, but instead watched the girl as she shyly ducked her head and made her way to her seat.

Across the room.

Buffy sat back and tried hard, so hard, to observe without letting her own insecurities or jealousies take over. It was hard. Especially when Spike and Tara kept glancing at each other. With every look Spike gave to Tara, he would immediately back up with one to Buffy. She tried hard to keep her expression impassive, but found it difficult. She found herself repeating "It has to be a spell. He loves me. Just me. It's Tara. She's evil. It's a spell. He loves me."

By the end of class, Buffy was more than ready to get out away from Tara. She felt wave after wave of nausea hit her and wondered briefly if Tara was upping the mojo due to her surprise visit to Spike's class. And when the last student, sans Tara, had filed out of the room, Buffy flew to the front of the room and wrapped herself around Spike.

"Baby," she purred, "You were magnificent."

Spike seemed to be warring with himself. She could feel the tension within him as his arms came around her gingerly. Buffy's head turned just slightly and she stared Tara down.

"H-hi Buffy. How are you?"

"Fine."

Spike nudged her. Buffy resisted the urge to elbow him in the stomach. Instead she parted from Spike and stood in front of him, protecting him.

"Are you patrolling with us tonight?" Tara asked, tucking some hair behind her ear and ducking her head.

"No. We're not patrolling. We're going home and so are you."

"Buffy, you don't have to be rude," Spike muttered.

Buffy bit her tongue and smiled sweetly at Tara. "Have a good night!"
Tara appeared thoroughly confused and with a stuttered good night, shuffled out of the room.

Buffy braced herself.

"Buffy honestly! How can you just let the girl go out there with no one to help her?" He demanded angrily.

"She's the fucking Slayer! She'll figure it out. She saw one remember? I'm sure she has the logistics down. Stake, heart, dust."

He was seething and Buffy wanted nothing more than to slap him for not trusting HER. She was trying so hard to keep herself together, to keep them together and she was failing miserably. She supposed telling him about visiting Tara's hometown tomorrow would be a huge mistake so instead she told him calmly that she was going out with her mother the following day for the day. Spike grunted his acceptance and Buffy followed him out the door wondering if she was cracking up and praying for some guidance.

Chapter 15

"Should I sleep on the couch or just go to my mother's so you don't have to see me?" Buffy asked wearily as they walked through the door at home.

Spike stopped and turned to her. "What?" Once the words sunk in and the meaning behind them, his entire expression softened. "Buffy, no . . . " he shook his head and walked to her, his arms reaching to gather her in his arms. Buffy held up her hands to stop him. He looked hurt, but he had no idea how much having him defend Tara hurt her. Whatever spell was being woven, it was tearing them apart and it killed her that Spike couldn't see it. She didn't want to fall in his arms just to have him push her away later.

"Buffy?" he asked softly, sadly and it was almost her undoing. "No," he was shaking his head. "You're my wife and my mate and you stay here with me."

"You don't act like I'm your mate. I asked you once if it was me or if it was
because I had super powers. I also said once that we'd never given anyone
else a chance. Is it true Spike? Are you finding the accusations I once made
true now? Do you wish you could give me up for Tara?"

His eyes widened and he rushed to her, wrapping her in his arms before
she could stop him. "No, Buffy. God how can you think that? It's you, only
you. You know that, you have to know that!"

"You were upset with me today for thinking I didn't trust you. When the
fact of the matter is, you don't trust me. Can't you see it? Can't you see that
when Tara is away you're with me again, but when she's near all we do is
argue? Spike, I saw it in class today. I saw how you kept looking at her!
Why can't you see it? It's a spell Spike. She's got you on a spell and it's
tearing us apart and I just want you to trust me!" She was crying now and
she didn't care to hold back. She was just so frustrated by the whole
situation and by not having proof . . .

"I'm just really tired of it," Buffy murmured, trying to move out of his
arms. He gripped her against him.

"What do you mean?" he asked hoarsely.

"I mean that I'm tired. I really am just tired. Let me go Spike."

"You're staying here Buffy. God dammit you can't just run off every time
something gets a little rough. You just take off. Just like you did when you
went to London—"

She pushed him away roughly. "How long is that going to be flung in my
face for?"

"When you stop running from us!"

"You don't see what's happening!"

"Then make me see it!"

"I can't make you see it without proof. You don't see it when she's around.
She's always around in some way even when she's not here!!"

"I don't know what to do Buffy. I'm sorry baby, I'm sorry, please just don't
leave me."

"That's just it Spike," she sobbed. "I'm not leaving you. You're leaving me."



In the end, Buffy did stay as Spike wouldn't let her past the door and Buffy just didn't have it in her to argue any longer. He also refused to leave her and crawled in next to her, holding her close to him and refusing to let her go. Ever. Buffy just let him and listened with tears streaming down her cheeks. She wondered if she was going to have to threaten leaving to get him back until she could prove Tara was some kind of fraud.

The next morning he'd begged her to stay with him and as much as she wanted to, she couldn't. She was on a mission and the mission was to find out the truth about Tara. If she could prove at least one part of Tara's Slayer story was a lie and get proof, then she'd be able to have something tangible to convince her loved ones with. Her other agenda was to find out if there was any foul play in Tara's past. Something lurking there that made her evil. A rough childhood, dabbling in the Dark Arts—something, anything. If she had a background to work with, she might have a better way to fight and conquer her. She was finally able to leave that morning with the promise that she'd check in and that he could call to check in as well. Making a big show of showing him the cell in her purse, she left.

She did plan on taking her mother with her. She was the irrefutable one. The one that Spike would listen to in a heartbeat. She filled her mother in on what was going on as they drove into Salem and Joyce vowed to help in anyway she could. She had been upset and appalled, not to mention hurt that she'd been kept out of the loop. Buffy explained it was probably best that way since any exposure to Tara would have turned her too.

Tracing Tara was easy. Finding the library, she did a search on the net and then looked up her parents which Willow had informed her were still alive. She then did a search on the happenings in the town on a death of a little girl by mysterious means around the time Tara had been a young girl. She came across nothing of the sort. With an address in her hand, she found a nearby electronics store and bought herself a compact tape recorder. She'd decided in the end that if Tara's family or anything remotely associated with the girl could have been contaminated with whatever mojo was working on everyone else but Buffy, her mother could be contaminated in kind and thus be of no help to her. Leaving her mother to wait in the car, Buffy made the trek up to Tara's childhood home and knocked on the door.

A woman, aged about forty or so answered the door. She had a friendly smile, Tara's glossy brown hair and bright eyes. She was a bit on the frumpy side, wearing plain brown pants and a white t-shirt at least two sizes too big.

"Hi, can I help you?"

"Mrs. McClay?"

"Yes, that's me," she looked at Buffy strangely.

"Hi, my name is uh . . . Brenda. Brenda Starr." Great job Buffy. Couldn't
even come up with a name from the high school yearbook. One thing was
for sure. She wasn't going to be asked to go into Private Investigation
anytime soon. Best to keep going with the ruse. "I went to high school with
Tara for a while until I moved away and I was wondering if she still lived
here? It's been so long since I've seen her . . . "

"Oh hon, Tara doesn't live here anymore. Well, I take that back. She does
on holidays and the occasional weekend but she goes to school at Boston
College."

"Oh," Buffy frowned, "That's too bad that I missed her."

"Come in, come in. Would you like something to drink?"

"Oh sure! Thanks!" Buffy entered the small home, taking in the old and
worn woodwork and the clutter of papers on tables and on the floor. It was
welcoming, homey and more importantly—no sour smell.

Mrs. McClay bustled about the kitchen, making iced tea.

"Salem is just so busy and fun, isn't it?" Buffy started.

The woman smiled. "It is. Almost makes me feel that much more
protected, being surrounded by so many witches."

Buffy smiled, thanking her silently for the opening. "Do you practice at
all?"

"Heavens no. But I don't look down on those who do."

"Tara, she seemed interested in Wicca for a while there . . . "Buffy let that
trail off, hoping that Mrs. McClay would take the bait.

She nodded as she poured Buffy a tall glass of tea. "She was. Went through
a phase –well, you must remember since you were friends."

"Yeah, she never spoke much to me about it." She hoped she didn't blow
her cover.

"She was interested, but it never took flight. She dabbled in it, but it's not
for everyone you know?"

Buffy nodded. "Yeah, I get that completely." Ha! If she only knew! Some
were called to it from lifetimes past, others, like herself, were born with it.

Mrs. McClay cocked her head to the side and studied Buffy. "She never
spoke about you, I'm afraid to say."

"Well, Tara and I, we, uh, we talked in school mostly, but we never saw
much of each other outside of school. I always thought she was rather nice
though."

"Yeah, Tara was always quiet in high school. She was always such a loner."

"I remember," Buffy replied, nodding.

"Always so shy, Tara was. Her best friend growing up was quite outspoken
and I'm afraid after her friend left, she kind of retreated within herself."

Could this be the infamous friend who'd died from the vampire?

"Oh?"

Mrs. McClay smiled fondly. "Amanda Livingston. She moved when Tara
was young."

"How young?"

"Ten."

"I remember her mentioning an Amanda now that you mention it! She
made it seem as if she died or something, the whole thing was so dire,"
Buffy said giggling nervously.

Mrs. McClay rolled her eyes. "I suppose when you're so young and your
best friend moves across country it does seem as if it is the end of the
world. Amanda was her link to the world. She kept her busy that one. And
her family was close to ours so it was very sad when they moved. She and
Tara lost touch, as you do when you're young."

"That's too bad. Tara is such a sweet girl."

"She is. She found a new best friend I hear in Boston. A girl named Willow.
All Tara did the first year she attended was talk of her."

"Sounds like you don't hear from her much anymore."

Mrs. McClay shook her head sadly. "I don't. Seems almost as if she
dropped off the planet. She used to call every day and now . . . now we –her
father and I – are lucky to hear from her once a week."

"That's too bad," Buffy said, feeling the pieces all clicking into place.
Something was afoot all right, and Buffy had a sudden sinking feeling that it
might not have anything to do with Tara at all.

 

Chapter Sixteen

Buffy spoke with Tara's mother for over an hour and by the end of her conversation Buffy felt she had a handle on the real Tara. The real Tara was the shy, meek girl that she had bee portraying to the group. However, something had happened to her. Something made her change. Willow had expressed a change in Tara since being called and her mother had also expressed a change in her –Buffy put two and two together and came to the conclusion that something happened to Tara upon being called.

When Mrs. McClay had directed Buffy to the bathroom on the second floor, Buffy had taken a detour, quickly finding Tara's room. No lingering sour scents and nothing pointing at foul play from the girl. In fact, the gigantic cross hanging on the wall behind her bed suggested to Buffy that Tara was deep in her faith. She felt nothing but peace and ease from the house, from Tara's room.

Panic set in quickly after that.

If it wasn't Tara then what was it? And why? And how could she be fight
something that she just didn't know what it was or what was happening?
Excusing herself quickly from Mrs. McClay, Buffy slumped into her
mothers car, feeling weary.

"Well?"

"I feel as if so much is swirling around in my head and I can't make sense
of any of it," Buffy replied rubbing her forehead.

"Is there evil afoot?"

"Yeah. I'm just not sure where anymore."


"Has Spike called?"

Buffy's head snapped up. Spike. She checked her phone, reaching in and
grabbing it out of her purse. "I haven't heard from him all day . . . " Buffy
trailed off. It was almost three in the afternoon. That was odd. The way
he'd acted that morning, she was surprised she'd made it out the door. She
quickly pressed the speed dial to their home and pressed the phone to her
ear. It rang eleven times. The answering machine would have picked up
after the third ring.

"Mom, get home now. Something's not right."

"What is it honey?" Joyce asked, pulling out onto the street.

"He's not answering. It's the middle of the day. Something's wrong." Tears
sprang to her eyes.

"Buffy honey, you need to calm down. Breathe. Try again. Call Giles and
see if he's there."

"He's a vampire mom! He'd be dust if he left!"

"He's been known to use a blanket or hats in cases of emergency."

"Yeah, an emergency! What could have possibly happened that no one
could have called us!" Buffy cried hysterically.

"Buffy, stop! You're going to make yourself sick."

"Something's not right," Buffy whimpered as she gripped the door and
started to pray.



She couldn't get a hold of anyone and the hour drive back home was the
longest hour of Buffy's life. When they finally made it to the apartment,
Buffy flew out of the car, ordering Joyce to stay put. Flying up the stairs as
best she could as to not hurt herself or the baby, Buffy was hit by the sour
smell practically seeping outside the door. The scent was stronger than it
had ever been and she swore she could practically see a green mist oozing
out the door.


Tara was paying a visit and whatever was happening behind those doors,
she was making it a doozy. Or IT was making it a doozy.

Opening the door, Buffy crept inside, making sure to watch her back. One
thing she'd learned from horror movies and her life: Always watch your
back.

She opened her mouth to yell for Spike when she heard a moan. She
strained to hear. Moan of pleasure or pain? She heard it again. Definite
moan of pleasure. Her heart dropped into her stomach and as if on auto
pilot she moved into the bedroom. What she saw made her clutch her
heart.

Spike was lying, with no shirt on, on the bed and Tara . . . Tara was on top
of him, unbuttoning his pants. Spike was looking up at her with his eyes half
massed with passion, his mouth seeking hers. Tara was muttering
something to him that Buffy couldn't make out.

Buffy snapped into action and lunged forward, grabbing Tara by her
ponytail and yanking her off Spike. "Get your fucking hands off my
husband!" She flung Tara away as if she were nothing more than a rag doll.
Tara's eyes widened in shock and then darted to Spike.

Spike was mumbling something and still reaching his arms out. Listening
closer, Buffy could hear what he was saying "Buffy…Buffy baby, love you so
much…Buffy, where are you? Buffy. . . "

Buffy turned to Tara who was picking herself up off the floor. "What the
hell did you do to him?"

Tara glared daggers at her. "Wouldn't have had to do it if you didn't always
get in the way!"

"Get used to it. He's my mate and my husband," Buffy spat through
clenched teeth.

"He was supposed to be with me! He was meant for me, not for you!" Tara
screamed.

"Wh--"

"Buffy?"

Buffy looked down to see Spike gazing up at her and then at Tara, confused.
"Why are there two of you?"

"No, baby, just me. Just me, right here. Feel me. See? It's me?" She told
him, taking his hand and squeezing it. "Just hold on—" She let go to go after
Tara and found her gone.

"Buffy?"

Buffy nodded, tears rolling down her cheeks unchecked. What had she done
to him? And the image of him with her . . . she couldn't get it out of her
head.

A conversation popped in her mind unbidden:


"…I tried a glamour spell and it worked."
"Glamour spell?"
"You know when you change your appearance? I wanted to have black hair for a night just to see if my girlfriend liked it. Which, she did."


"So that's what she did to you," Buffy murmured. Looking at him, she did the only thing she could think of at that time to snap him out of it. She leaned over and bit him. "Mine," she growled at him. He let out a shout and she knew he must have orgasmed from it. He looked up at her, dazed.

"We're getting out of here," she told him softly and helped him to his feet.
He was groggy and fell against her, whimpering.

"It's okay, Spike. Mom's outside. We're going to mom's, okay?"

He nodded dumbly and allowed Buffy to lead him out of the apartment,
away from the stench, the magic, and the image of Tara and Spike together
on the bed.

Joyce's eyes were wide with fear and uncertainty. "Buffy?"

"Can we crash at your house mom?"

Joyce nodded and pulled out.

Buffy looked down at her husband as he gazed up at her. With a shaking
hand he attempted to touch her, but she stopped him. It hurt to do it, but
those hands had touched Tara. They'd . . . she couldn't even think it.
Instead, she swept a hand over his eyelids. "Sleep." She said soothingly and
watched as his eyelids fluttered and finally closed. "Sleep," she whispered
again and soon she felt the shift in his body as he took rest.

"Buffy, what happened?" Joyce asked finally. "I saw a young woman run
out of the apartment, was that Tara? Did she do something to Spike?"

"Yep, she did. And she's gonna pay."

 

Chapter 17

On the way to her mother's Buffy dialed Giles and told him he needed to get to her mothers right that second and to not let Tara in under any circumstances. He was surprisingly agreeable and very much concerned.

Clicking her phone shut, she glanced down at Spike and felt tears start to prick the corners of her eyes. She refused to give into them though. She needed to be stoic. Keep a stiff upper lip and not let what she saw and what was happening get to her. If she did, she'd be incapable of fighting.

"Do you think she'll go after Giles?" Joyce asked, worried.

"I don't think she will, but who knows. I mean, she knows the relationship
we ha—you know what it probably doesn't matter because she did just go
after my husband."

"What exactly happened in there Buffy? Is he hurt?"

"I don't know mom. He doesn't appear to be. Not physically anyway. She
had him under a spell."

"What kind of spell? What were they doing?"

"Mom!" Buffy shouted, exasperated. "I don't want to talk about it right
now okay? I need to think."

The silence, however, was deafening.

"Okay, so I'm going to talk now. Brainstorm, all right?"

Joyce nodded.

"I'm sorry mom, I didn't mean to yell at you. I'm just—I feel like I'm going
to crawl out of my skin right now."

"It's okay honey. You just need to take it easy. It's not good for the baby."

"Yeah, I know," Buffy murmured. It was at that moment that she felt the
movement in her womb. Her eyes widened and she snapped to attention.
"Mom," Buffy said urgently, her mouth half closed.

"Did you say something honey?"

"Ssshhh… mom."

"Which is it Buffy? Do you want me to talk or be quiet?" Joyce was getting
testy now.

"The baby just kicked," Buffy whispered.

Joyce's eyes widened and a sappy smile spread across her face. "She did?"

Buffy nodded. "She—or he—did." She placed her hand over her stomach
and felt it again, this time against her hand. She burst into tears. "My baby
kicked and it's Daddy is under some kind of spell and that bitch Tara tried
to have sex with my husband," Buffy wailed through her tears.

"She tried to WHAT?!?" Joyce exclaimed.

"Spike is right. I do run away because all I want to do right now is go back
to London when everything seemed so simple and easy!" "Honey, it wasn't
all that simple and easy."

"Yes it was," Buffy argued, wiping her tears away.

"I remember how much you missed him. You wouldn't be able to do that
again, no matter how much you want to. And especially not now. You have
a baby on the way and a husband to fight for. This is your family Buffy and
you have to stay and protect it."

"I know. I'm just so scared. I don't know what to do."

"You're doing it Buffy. You might not realize it, but you're doing it by
staying by Spike and not giving up. No matter how much you want to, you
haven't. I'm so proud of you honey."

"Thank you mommy," Buffy whimpered and wiped a few more tears away.
She sat back and took one of Spike's lifeless hands and placed it on her
stomach, willing the baby to kick again. He might not be conscious to feel it,
but she still wanted to have him part of the moment.



Giles met them at Joyce's and helped carry Spike in. He set the vampire
down in Buffy's old room turned guest room and met Buffy in the kitchen
where she sipped hot chocolate and was working through a bowl of ice
cream. Sure sign that Buffy was stressed. When Giles entered, she looked
up at him and gestured for him to sit. Joyce placed a mug of tea in front of
Giles and sat down beside him.

"What happened Buffy? What's going on? Are you all right?" Giles asked,
concern etched all over his face. He took off his glasses and started cleaning
them.

"I'm all right Giles. Thanks for the concern." She couldn't help the
bitterness in her voice.

"Of course I'm concerned, there's no reason for your sarcasm."

"Yeah. Right. Maybe you didn't realize it, but you've been under the spell
of Tara too."

His brow furrowed. "Spell? Tara put a spell on us?"

Buffy rolled her eyes. "I'm gonna take it from the top. Tell you what I've
observed, what I've learned and what happened tonight. Can you just not
say anything until I'm done?"

Giles nodded.

Buffy launched into her story from when Spike came home telling her
about Tara and how they'd been having problems when it came to the girl.
She explained her take on the night she met Tara, to the conversation she
had with Willow and what happened when she visited Spike in class. She
went on to tell him about her visit to Salem that day and what happened
when she arrived home.

Giles, she observed, grew paler with each word and was gripping the edge
of the table so tight, his knuckles were turning white. That wasn't when he
was cleaning his glasses every five seconds.

"So you believe that the scent that you keep smelling is a spell that Tara is
using so we all fall in line with her and turn against you," Giles said when
she was done.

"Yes. Willow said she found it hard to say no to her, she also she changed
when she became called. She went from loving girlfriend to Willow and
loving daughter to her parents, to basically denying her relationship with
Willow and not bothering to call her parents anymore. Giles, that smell wasn't there this afternoon. The things I saw in her room, the stories her
mother told me – there's nothing that points to ill will from Tara."

"It could be a ruse Buffy. It's like the family whose parents beat a child.
From the outside, they look normal, but inside is discord and dysfunction,"
Joyce offered.

"No. I feel it. I don't think that it's Tara herself. I think she's possessed by
something. Even in a dysfunctional family, you can get a sense that
something is off. I've felt it from day one with Tara. Something about her is
not right. And tonight, before she left she was ranting about how Spike was
meant to be hers. How I got in the way and he was meant for her and not
me."

"A woman obsessed and believing that the man she's ‘in love' with would
say such things—believe such things," Giles pointed out.

"True, but Giles, she had to use a glamour spell to get him to touch her."
Buffy closed her eyes as the image of it popped in her head. She shook it off.

"She knows we're mated and I almost think she wanted me to find them.
She wants all of you against me. If she were just after Spike because she
had some kind of sick obsession with him, she wouldn't care about you. But
she's weaved the spell over Willow, you and Spike. She sought us out. She
used Willow to get to us. All to turn against me."

"Don't you think she'd want to get us on her side so we'd be accepting of
Spike turning his back on you and the baby?" Giles asked.

"I can't explain how I know that there is something else than just wanting
Spike in this mess . . . but I just know it. There's a larger reason and I don't
know what it is or even how to start to figure it out."

The three sat in silence for a long while, pondering. A knock at the door
broke them out of their reverie. Buffy shot up. "I'll get it."

"Buffy, what if it's her?" Joyce asked, putting a hand on Buffy's arm to stop
her daughter.

"It's not. I would have smelled her." Stalking towards the door, she opened
it cautiously, ready to defend herself should she need to. What she saw
however caused her whole body to sag with relief and joy. What she saw
also made her tears start to flow yet again. She saw light at the end of the
tunnel, saw salvation.

"Hey kid."

"Whistler," she breathed and flung herself in the demons arms.



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