Title: Allies or Love?
Author: Carla Laurelle
****************************
part 2/4
****************************

"She's dead. She's probably lying in a gutter somewhere and here I am
being absolutely useless", Giles ranted .

Buffy was supposed to check in with him earlier that morning, and he
would have appertained her tardiness to her slacker attitude towards
slaying and other related situations, except that not only was she late, but she was almost nine hours late . She had never even showed up for school!

Xander and Willow sat at the library table. Although Xander looked
almost unaffected , Willow was extremely worried .

"Giles, I'm sure she's alright . Maybe she's just sick.", Willow said,
not only trying to convince Giles, but convince herself .

"I've called her house already, there's no one there ", he replied,
exasperated . He removed his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose
.

"Well, maybe she's just so sick she doesn't want to answer the phone",
Willow said, trying to be helpful.

Xander sat at the other side of the table. He was engrossed in putting
m&m's on a plastic spoon and flicking them across the room . They made
barely audible clinking noises as they hit the floor, desk, table, ect.

"No worries Will", he said, "Buffy's fine. She's like Superman!
Nothing'll kill her".

"Uh, Xander. Kryptonite could kill superman", Willow objected softly.

"Oh. Well. Assuming there's none of that around here, Buffy should be safe", he said, trying to save himself embarrassment .

"Well Xander, Buffy's not exactly faster than a speeding bullet or more
powerful than a locomotive", Willow rolled her eyes , shocked by Xanders complete lack of concern for they're friend . He's usually the *first* one to demand a search party sent after her . Especially since Angel's 'change of heart'.

"Yes, Willow's right", Giles cut in, "Although you've never had to train with her so I'm not sure about the locomotive part", he added absently to himself.

"So let's go look for her", Xander said. "I can use my trusty x-ray
vision".

"Maybe we should", Willow said, ignoring Xander's humor. "I mean, she
could be in trouble".

"Yes, quite right", Giles agreed. "We'll start at her house and go from
there".

"Great, just let me pull on my blue tights and red underwear", Xander
said, lobbing another m&m in the direction of the bookcase.

"Xander, I think we can do without the Superman analogies".

Xander flicked another m&m. It went off course and hit Giles in the
middle of the forehead .

"And could you please refrain from shooting bits of candy at things", he said , rubbing the spot were the m&m had hit him .

"Yeah. Sorry G-man", Xander said, hiding the spoon.

"I hope you know you are cleaning that up upon our return".

***********************************************************************

Buffy entered the library to find it empty.

** Great . Giles is probably pissed that I didn't show**. She figured it was either that or he, Xander, and Willow had organized an official
search party to hunt her down . **complete with blood hounds , horses,
and the funny-looking guy with the trumpet that yells 'tally ho'** she
thought to herself with a giggle before returning her mind to the
problem at hand .

Buffy glanced out the window and saw that the sun had just gone down.
She must have been at the mansion all day!

She turned on her heels and headed out the door. The school was
deserted with the exception of the janitor that was probably somewhere
*not* doing his job .

As she walked out the double doors of the library she felt 'it' like a
sharp pain in her side . Angel was here, and that was so not good. She wasn't completely healed from her last encounter with him, and she couldn't afford to let him gain the upper hand again.

Stealthily, Buffy moved in the shadows down the hall . She had to get
out and find Giles and the others, and she preferably wanted to do that
while avoiding a confrontation with Angel . Now was not the time. She
didn't know exactly what Spike had planned , but it didn't involve
pissing Angel off before the time was right .

Buffy could see the doors leading outside. **Almost there**

She heard the fall of footsteps behind her, and bolted through the
doors. Without thinking, she ran blindly across the campus, picking up
the pace with each step . She could barely hear Angel in pursuit.

All she could think about was getting away from him for now. On normal
circumstances she would have stood her ground and fought him , but this
wasn't a normal circumstance . She had to avoid contact with him at all
cost.

The idea of running from him made her sick. She knew she would hear
about it in their next confrontation . But for now she focused on
finding her friends . And Spike.

Turning a street corner sharply, Buffy ran at top speed down the street
. She could no longer hear Angel behind her.

"Good. Maybe he gave up", she mumbled to herself as she continued to
pick up speed .

She spoke too soon.

With a suddeness that surprised her and caught her off guard, Angel
jumped out from the shadows just as she passed him . Before Buffy could
respond, he threw his arms around her waist and pulled her to the
ground. Buffy struggled ferociously, but Angel sat on top of her and
pinned her arms and legs down with his own .

"Well...now that I've had my exercise for the evening, we can get down
to business", Angel said roughly , still trying to suppress Buffy while
she struggled against him .

"Get off of me", Buffy said snidely. True, it lacked the sting she
usually had when she said a pun instead, but it was all she could think
off . And all she cared about.

Angel laughed. "Let me think about that one. Umm...no".

Buffy looked around quickly for something she could use against Angel.
He had her pinned to the ground pretty hard, but if she could manage to
throw him off of her she had to be able to get a hold of something to
use against him . Instead, Buffy saw the shape that moved stealthily in
the shadows . It was no more than twenty feet away. She knew exactly
who it was, and what she had to do .

Distraction time. Now *she* was the one that got to play the game.

"You know", Buffy began, trying to sound seductive, "I always did kind
of like this position".

Buffy registered the confusion in Angel's eyes. This was not the
reaction he had anticipated. He had been expecting the delicious taste of fear from her, but that didn't mean this new reaction didn't please him. His eyes darkened with growing arousal.

The shape moved silently closer.

"I-In fact...I , um ...have been...waiting! Yeah, waiting . ", Buffy
said unsurely, frantically trying to think of something to keep him
focused on her and not the figure sneaking up behind him .

"For what?", Angel asked in a lusty whisper.

She thought furiously about what to say. Suddenly it hit her and she
said the first thing that popped into her mind , reminded by a distant
memory .

She giggled girlishly. "I've been waiting for you to jump my bones", she said in a playful manner. Although she was smiling and flirting on the outside, she couldn't help but blush with embarrassment on the inside .

She recalled the time when her position had been reversed, and Xander had said that very same thing to her . Of course, he *was* possessed by a hyena, but what did that matter? She had no idea hyenas were so horny.

"I don't know ", Angel began in a playfully skeptical tone. It was
obvious he was enjoying this kind of reaction from her, and had
decided to postpone the whole killing thing he had planned for tonight
for a something better to occupy his time . "What did you have in
mind?".

Another 'Xander-ized' memory popped into her mind .

Buffy nuzzled her head against his neck, and kissed him just below the
chin .

"Well it's a party. Aren't you gonna open your present?".

By now Buffy could see that the shadow had picked up a heavy tree branch and was prepared to strike .

She turned her eyes towards Angel and held his gaze, suddenly cold and vicious, said " I'll give you your present".

Just then the figure swung and connected the tree branch to the side of
Angel's head. Momentarily stunned, Angel let down his guard . It was
more than Buffy needed , but before she could throw him off of her
herself, the figure picked him up and threw him with such force that he
landed almost ten feet away .

Buffy was yanked to her feet, and pushed into a blind sprint .

When they finally rested, stopping somewhere near the park, Buffy
dropped down onto a bench to catch her breath .

"God, Spike", Buffy said, still panting . "Do you think you could have
taken *any* longer in getting there?", she said , her voice dripping
with sarcasm.

"What could I say, luv? I was enjoying the show", he said with a
mocking laugh.

Buffy glared at him. "Yeah, well , it was all I could think of".

"It was a good idea. Smart. But you do realize what you would have
gotten yourself into had I not been there ."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Yeah, well , you see how that worked is , I
knew you were there . I'm not blind, and you weren't exactly concealing
yourself too well , Billy Idol ".

"And what if I was there with Angel? On his side, hunting? What would you have done then?"

Buffy looked at the ground. She couldn't think of what she would have
done , or what Angel would have done to her . It wasn't something she
really wanted to think about .

"Just hope he didn't see that it was me ", Spike told her in annoyance.

Buffy looked up with anger in her eyes.

"Oh, so if he did , what are you gonna do? Deny it? Leave me here to
deal with him? Throw ME to the lion?"

Spike closed his eyes and let out a sigh of frustration.

But Buffy wasn't done yet.

"At least *I* know what I'm getting into, but I don't think you do .
After we let him and Drusilla...see us together..you know it's over
for you . You won't have anything left. No family , if you can call
them that. You'll be the loose end . The outcast. They won't let you back in with them , and they sure as hell won't let you ever escape the fact that you were 'with' the slayer", she ranted. "In fact, I don't think they'd let you escape at all! They'd kill you in a heartbeat..not that any of you're hearts beat".

Spike stared out into the night.

"And what are all your other little pet vampires gonna think, huh? I
don't think they'll be too eager to follow a leader that betrayed them ,do you?"

"I know what I'm getting into, and I'm ready to give it up", Spike
shouted angrily . "Nobody crosses me the way *they* did. They will
*pay* for it , I swear it right now".

Buffy stood there, stunned . Spike sounded so bitter, so full of
hatred . The dangerous power she saw glowing in his crystallic eyes was almost frightening.

Then it dawned on her. He wasn't letting her in on the whole plan, was
he?

"We aren't just gonna make them jealous, are we?"

Spike looked away, hiding his face from her .

"You're going to kill them , aren't you?"

"So what if I am?" he countered . "Will that bother you? Angel killed
one of your friends already , and he's not going to stop until they're
all dead . You were gonna have to kill him sooner or later so it might
as well be sooner".

Buffy stared hard at him, but her face was not one of hatred or fury,
but one of confusion and thought .

"I'm not ready to kill him", she said softly . "I...don't want...to
kill him".

Spike looked at her small, suddenly frail form and a pang of pity slivered through him. "He's gone, luv . The person you knew
isn't coming back , you can't continue to deny that".

"I know. But I'm still not ready". Buffy looked up into Spikes eyes.
"Promise me you won't do it until I say so. You can kill Drusilla,
she's not my problem ...it's Angel I'm worried about . Let me kill
him".

Spike looked away with annoyance and then turned back to her.
"Buffy...", he said in a soft whining voice. It was the first time he
had ever used her name . It sounded wonderful to her. His voice was
both dark and powerful , yet soft and gentle at the same time . But she
ignored that for now .

"I'm serious", Buffy persisted. "Not until I'm ready, deal?"

Spike stared at her through his crystal blue eyes for a few seconds before answering. "Fine".

"Good", Buffy concluded.

"You should get home now. I have to get back to the mansion. I
need to be ready when Angel comes storming in."

He turned to walk away, but stopped himself and looked back.

"Do you want me to walk you home?", he asked unsurely.

Buffy gave him a faint smile.

"No. I'll be alright".

Spike nodded and turned to leave again.

"Spike?", Buffy called after him. He turned at the sound of her voice.

"Thank you", she said sincerely.

Spike smiled and nodded, taking in the unspoken meaning of her words.
The slayer was ready to trust him, and he couldn't betray that trust.

With lightning speed, he was gone.

Buffy stood and looked after him for a few beats before turning and
walking slowly towards her house.

***********************************************************************


THE NEXT DAY:


"Hey guys", Buffy said cheerfully as she walked into the library to find Giles, Willow, and Xander sitting around the table .

"Buffy!" they all exclaimed in unison.

"Wow. Didn't know you were expecting me", Buffy said, blinking her
eyes in surprise.

Giles walked hurridly towards her. "Do you have any idea what we've
been through? Where were you yesterday, and furthermore , why did you
not contact us?"

"Oh", Buffy said in realization. She had totally forgotten about
finding Giles and the others after her meeting with Spike. "Well, I
was...out...um, slaying , and I got kind of tied up . I guess I was
just so tired that I forgot to check in afterwards and I just went home
and slept", she lied.

"Yes, so why were you not at school or at home yesterday?", Giles
persisted, suspicious.

"I forgot?" Buffy offered meekly.

Giles furrowed his brow. "Buffy, whats going on?".

"Okay, fine, I was out with…um, a guy", Buffy admitted. At least she
admitted *that* much.

"Alright, I don't know about anyone else , but I don't feel Buffy needs to go into detail", Xander spoke up, obviously not wanting to hear about what he thought was Buffy's new love
interest that yet again *wasn't* him.

Willow, on the other hand, knew better.

"Buffy, what about Angel? I mean, after he changed...you were
kinda..."

"Will! I didn't say it was a *date* thing, I said it was a *guy* thing. You know. A...thing...involving a...guy."

"Buffy, I would think you would know better than to completely ignore
your duties, not only to your slaying but to school and such, to 'hang
out' as you would say , with boys." , Giles reprimanded, sounding very british . "We were all worried sick, and spent the better part of last night searching for you! Luckily, when we ran across your mother , Willow was kind enough to tell your that you were meeting her at the Bronze so that Mrs. Summers wouldn't worry".

"Thanks Will", Buffy said, smiling at her friend.

Willow offered a 'you're welcome' smile back.

"Yes, well, going on, I really feel you must at least notify us if
you are to be absent so as we might prepare ourselves in a better
manner", Giles continued , still not done with his lecture yet .

"I'm sorry Giles, but there was something I had to do", Buffy said,
rolling her eyes .

"Well, all is well now, but please don't do it again in the future .
Now, what was this matter you were so involved in yesterday?".

"I...can't tell you. It's sort of a secret", Buffy responded, laying her purse on the table next to Willow's books .

"And when there's a secret, you should probably keep it a secret because it's...secret", said a nervous and on edge Xander. "Alright, I give up , what is his name and where does he live? I want details. We're talking phone number, physical description, does he have insurance, and whether or not he's bigger than me.

"Xander?" Willow asked.

"Yeah?"

She slapped him on the side of the head. "Chill out."

Xander looked stunned for a minute. "Okay. Feeling the temperature
drop".

Buffy laughed at her two best friends. They had been through so much because of her. She hated having to lie to them, but she also hated putting them in un-necessary danger.

"You guys don't need to worry about it ", she said, making it clear in
the tone of her voice that she didn't want to talk about it yet .

The bell rang, signaling the start of school.

"I hear biology calling", Xander said with a sigh as he stood up from
his seat .

**********************************************************************


LATER THAT NIGHT, AT THE BRONZE:


"So what really happened last night?", Willow asked Buffy.

They sat alone at they're usual table watching Cordelia and Xander dance. Oz was busy playing lead guitar in his band 'Dingoes Ate my Baby', who were the band for the evening at the Bronze.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you", Buffy answered, stirring her
drink with a straw.

Willow laughed. "Try me".

Buffy glanced at Xander and Cordelia. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to tell Willow. She kind of wanted to get it off her chest anyway. She really hated keeping secrets from her friends.

"Do you promise not to tell the others, including Giles?"

Willow nodded her head, though somewhat nervously. She didn't like keeping secrets either.

"Not even Oz", Buffy added, raising her eyebrows.

A faint smile crossed Willows face. "Okay, I promise".

"Alright. Well...I was with Spike".

Buffy had expected her friend to scream in total surprise, but instead
Willow's eyes bulged out and her mouth dropped in a silent O.

"Will?" Buffy asked.

Willow remained absolutely still with the look frozen on her face.

"Will, breath" Buffy commanded.

"Spike?" Willow sputtered finally . "Why? When? How? What happened?"

"Slow down, Will." Buffy sighed. "Its kinda hard to explain".

"Well I can't wait to hear it", Willow said in amazement.

"Okay, well, I was out slaying, like I said. At least that much was
true. Then Angel comes along and totally beats me into a bloody pulp"

Willow gave Buffy a you-can-do-better-than-that look.

"I know, I know. I could have beat him, but my heart just wasn't in
it, y'know? With all that had happened".

Willow's expression changed to one of understanding, and she urged Buffy to go on.

"Well, then there I am, almost unconscious and definitely in trouble, when someone comes out of the shadows and saves me. Willow, I could have died out there. Next thing I know I'm at the mansion and Spikes sitting there stroking my cheek like he was my lover or something".

"You mean he touched you, like, *without* trying to snap your neck or
rip your throat out?", Willow exclaimed.

"Well, he was the one that saved me, and he even bandaged me up,
see?", Buffy said, lifting up the corner of her shirt to reveal the
white bandages she wore around her middle. Buffy herself hadn't even noticed or found them until she had changed for bed the other night.

"I'm sorry, this is too weird. I mean...Spike? Whatever happened to
'oh I killed two slayers and I'm about to make it three'?"

"It gets better", Buffy continued.

"I'm not going to like this, am I?", Willow groaned.

**********************************************************************

20 MINUTES LATER...

"Okay, so let me get this straight", Willow said. "Spike wants *you*
to pretend that you and him are...you know...a couple, so that you
can make Angel and Drusilla insanely jealous and then kill them?"

"Thats what he said", Buffy answered. "Although he was pretty vague on
when this is all supposed to go down".

"Why spend the time to make them jealous? I mean, he's mister 'jump in without looking', why not just go in for the kill?" Willow questioned.

Buffy shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe he's in a lot of pain. We both are. Maybe he needs a little payback before its over and done with".

Willow watched her friend stare into her drink sadly. "Wow. Do you think you're ready? To kill Angel, I mean".

"I don't know...It's got to happen sometime. I can't afford to sit around while he decides to go on a killing spree. I have to do something, to protect you. To protect all of you", Buffy answered softly. "I mean...I still love him, but I love him the way he used to be. Not the monster he is now. I *need* to do it. I need to just
take Spike's advice and accept that Angel isn't the Angel I once knew,
and he's not coming back . I can't risk him killing anymore of my
friends".

"I'm sorry", Willow said sadly.

"It's okay, Will. I'll be fine", Buffy lied.

Buffy looked at her watch and jumped up suddenly.

"Oh! I told my mom I'd be home by ten. Gotta jet. Tell the others I
said 'Bye' for me "

"Okay, Bye", Willow called after her as Buffy quickly exited the Bronze.

***********************************************************************
end part 2/4

Title: Allies or Love?
Author: Carla Laurelle
***************************
part 3/4
***************************

Spike watched the figure silently from the shadows. The Slayer. It
still felt odd that he had, at least in some way, joined *her* team in the scheme of things . But, god, was the little chit beautiful.

Buffy walked silently down the dark street, lost in thought,
completely oblivious to Spike's presence .

He recalled the first time he had ever seen her. Him and Drusilla had
just arrived in Sunnyhell, and he had gone to the Bronze to check out
his competition . She had been sitting at a table with her friends, the
red-haired one and the impish boy who followed her around like a
puppy-dog. He remembered watching her as she got up and headed out to
the dance floor when the next song came on . He watched as her body
twisted and gyrated to the beat of the music . She was graceful and
sensual at the same time when she danced.

That was when he had sent out another dispensable vampire to attack
someone so he could get a look at her fighting skills . Even then, she
moved with the grace of a dancer . But that seemed like a long time ago. When he was still hell bent on killing her. When had things changed? Why didn't he kill her now?

Time after time, she had dodged his attempts to do away with her. It was really bloody annoying.

Finally, when she put him in the blasted wheelchair, he just gave up
all together. That must have been when things inside him started
changing. He watched as Drusilla and Angel became 'closer', and he loathed them entirely.

He figured he could identify with Buffy. She was going through the same thing he was. Soon he found himself thinking of her more often than he liked to admit. He began to admire the slayer at the same time he began to despise Drusilla and Angel. Now that was treading on dangerous ground. The damn Slayer, with her sexy body and her incredible persona, had already made one vampire fall in love with her. He wasn't anxious to be the second.

But those two had to pay. He would make them pay.

An evil grin split his lips as he thought of the sweet vengence he would wreak upon them.

He had long ago decided to make the Slayer part of his revenge. It was only fair to give her the opportunity to get some of her own back. After all…he liked her much better when she was defiant and powerful, not simpering and broody like she had been since Angel's change.

And it was time.

Spike left his hiding place in the shadows and fell in step behind the
slayer. Without warning she whirled around, stake in hand. His reflexes were like lightning. He knocked her arm aside, twisted the stake from her grasp, and pushed her away harshly, putting distance between them.

"Spike! God, don't scare me like that", Buffy exclaimed.

"Scare you? I was the one that almost got dusted!"

"Oh. Sorry", Buffy said, not sounding at all like she was too sorry.

"Apology accepted", Spike replied sarcastically.

Buffy looked at him for a minute, and then started laughing.

"What?" he asked indignantly.

"Nothing. Let's just not fight, okay? I'm not in the mood", she answered. She couldn't really tell him that sometimes when she got really nervous she would start to laugh for no reason. Knowledge was power, and she didn't want to give him any more power over her than he already had. His presence alone made her stomach flutter slightly, for no reason, and her heart start to beat more rapidly, also for no apparent reason.

"It's time", he said, looked off into the night as if he was looking
for something in particular .

Buffy snapped immediately to attention. "Time? Already? Don't I get a script or something?"

Spike looked at her curiously, wondering were her sudden nervousness came from. "Angel's planning on making a stop at your house tonight . I heard him bragging about it last night. It'll be the perfect time to start".

"Start?", Buffy asked, her voice squeaking with the pressure . "You
mean we do this more than once? Together?"

Spike looked at Buffy's horrified expression and laughed.

"Hey! What are you laughing at? I'm new at this", Buffy protested
defensively.

Without warning Spike reached out and pulled Buffy to him, crushing her roughly against his chest. The sudden lack of space between them caused Buffy to gasp, while at the same time her traitorous body leaned into his embrace. **stupid hormones**, she thought, seconds before she became lost in Spikes piercing blue eyes.

Spike brought his head down, his lips hovering inches from hers as he softly nuzzled against her cheek. "Now don't tell me you and Angel never showed each other your affection publically?", he asked, his voice a low purr in her ear.

Buffy looked up into his stormy eyes, completely lost in those crystal orbs. "Well, yeah we did , but..."

"Well then pretend I'm him and he's me", Spike interrupted in a whisper, tantalizing mouth moving closer to hers in an almost kiss.

Buffy, coming to her senses, suddenly pulled her head back and pushed her hands against his chest.

"Save it for the stage Romeo", she said with a laugh. Turning around,
she lead the way down the street towards her house. The second her back
was turned , she felt her face grow red and she mouthed the words 'oh my god ' silently to herself , hiding her blushing face from him.

Spike shrugged and followed.

***********************************************************************

AT BUFFY'S HOUSE....


Buffy stepped onto her porch and unlocked the door. For once she
actually got to walk through the door instead of going through her
window. After getting inside she turned to see Spike still standing on
her porch.

"What?"

"I need to be invited", he reminded her, gesturing towards the invisible barrier that kept him from entering her home.

"Oh. Vampire. Right", Buffy nodded. "Okay,uh, come on in".

Spike stepped across the threshold and into the Slayer's home for the first time.

"Oh no!", Buffy exclaimed, suddenly remembering her mom was home and that she had no excuse to have Spike there.

"Relax", Spike said, as if reading her mind . "Your mum had to go away
on some...business".

"You didn't", Buffy said threateningly. "If you hurt her, I swear I will…"

"No, luv. Your mum is fine. But her gallery received a new buyer
today who wants to purchase a large sum of paintings. She went to meet
him in L.A. Too bad he's not going to be there", he said with a smirk.

Buffy walked past him and into the kitchen. Sure enough, there was a
note on the counter saying that her mom had left on business and would
be back in a day or two, and that Buffy was supposed to spend the night with Willow until she returned.

"You thought of everything didn't you", Buffy said in amazement.

"I like to be prepared", Spike answered. "The last thing I need is to
be hit in the back of the head with a bloody axe again".

"Huh?", Buffy said, confused.

"Remember? It was actually only our second encounter, and your
mother...."

"Oh! Right. I remember now", Buffy said, stopping him before he
finished his story .

"Anyway...", she said, unsure of what to do next. The sexual tension
between both of them was so thick it could be cut with a knife.

But Spike had stopped listening to her. He was staring past her shoulder.

"Spike?"

He turned his gaze back to her, but now a mask had slipped over his features and he looked at her with utter love and adoration in his eyes.

"Yes luv", he said, reaching out an arm and encircling her waist, dragging her closer to him. From the outside it probably looked like they were quite cozy with each other, but Buffy could feel the slight tension in his arms, as if he was unsure of touching her or having her so close.

Buffy raised her eyebrows in a questioning is-it-time look. Spike gave a tiny nod, letting her know that the game was on.

Buffy waisted no time as she sprang into action. Who knew? Maybe this could be fun. After all, Spike wasn't exactly un-appealing. He had a well-toned, sexy body, killer cheek-bones, and eyes that could melt any girl into a liquidy puddle. She could see how his female victims would be easily drawn to him. The sobering thought of Spike's current state of un-deadness brought Buffy's mood down a bit, but she pushed it to the back of her mind. She had been miserable and broody for far too long. It was time for her to let go, and have a little fun doing it.

"So, what do you want to do now?", she said playfully, grabbing the
front of his coat and pulling him closer to her. Pressing her body intimately against his, she nuzzled his neck and relished in the very real gasp she heard escape his throat.

"I'm sure we can find something, pet", Spike answered, lifting her
chin to meet his eyes . He only paused momentarily before he bent his head down, touching his lips softly to hers. The kiss was tentative. Neither of them had kissed the other before, so they slowly explored each other, their tongues gently probing and caressing. It wasn't long before the kiss grew in intensity. Buffy circled her arms around his neck, pulling his mouth against hers more roughly. The embrace became more passionate and hungry, and somewhere in Buffy's muddled brain, a sudden thought registered. This wasn't a stage kiss. It was real.

Breaking the kiss, Buffy rested her head against Spike's chest to avoid meeting those burning eyes of his. Was this actually happening? How had this simple plan gone so wrong so quickly? She was actually aroused, for real! This wasn't supposed to happen. How could she let this happen?

The questions continued to bombard her when, out of the corner of her eye, she saw a movement outside. A black blurr raced by the window, and was gone so fast she almost questioned whether or not she saw it at all.

Spike, also still reeling from the un-planned passion that had been behind the kiss they had just shared, reached down and took her hand in his. The show must go on. Besides, things rarely went according to plan, and if truth be told, he wasn't all together unhappy with the change.

"Why don't we go upstairs", he said, almost casually.

Buffy's heart pounded with nervousness and anticipation. She itched to run her hands over his muscled body, and through his short, bleached locks. Was it just that it had been so long since she'd had male attention? Where had this sudden desire for Spike come from!

She had failed to ask how far they were supposed to take this charade. What if he pushed for more than she was willing to give? Or, worse, what if *she* pushed for more than he was willing to give? She would never live it down!

Taking a deep breath, Buffy pushed the thoughts out of her mind. She had already gotten herself into this mess, so what will be will be. Stupid Slayer hormones.

As they passed through the living room, Buffy caught a glimpse of another blurr out the window, but Spikes gentle squeaze of her hand brought her attention back towards him.

When they reached Buffy's room, Spike lead Buffy into the room before
shutting and locking the door behind them.

"What now?", Buffy asked sensually, aware that her window was open,
and everything could be seen and heard perfectly from outside.

Spike took her into his arms again and smiled.

"Improvise".

He leaned down and kissed her again, this time it wasn't nearly as tentative as the first. Nope, they had bypassed tentative and gone straight into full-blown passion.

Buffy mindlessly reached up and slid Spike's long leather duster from his shoulders, removing it without breaking from his tantalizingly sweet lips. Her brain had taken a detour long ago, leaving her body in control now. And as much as her brain knew it was bad and wrong, her body wanted Spike. Her brain made a mental note to tell her body 'I told you so' later…but not now.

Throwing it to the floor, Buffy began to unbutton the top buttons of his red shirt. Getting frustrated with them quickly, Buffy violently ripped his shirt open the rest of the way.

Spike broke the kiss and turned his back to the window quickly before giving Buffy a questioning look. She couldn't be serious about wanting what she was asking for…could she?

He had to admit, it would be bloody fantastic, and it would *really* give Angelus what he deserved, but he had never had the Slayer pegged for the spontaneous type. At least, not when it came to intimacy. He wasn't going to force her, but if she was willing than he was more than happy to oblige. But he didn't want the Slayer to do something she was going to regret in the morning. He may be a vampire, but unfortunately his heart was all too easily involved in matters he didn't want it a part of.

Buffy stared up at him and put both her hands on either side of his face. Standing on her tip-toes, she placed a soft kiss on his lips before whispering, "Please, Spike. Don't judge. I know what I want."

She took a tiny step back before gently slipping the straps of her tank-top off her shoulders so that they hung against her arms, completely exposing her shoulders and neck to him.

Spike kept his back to the window before answering so quietly that only
she could hear him. "I don't think thats a good idea, pet". His mind was screaming **stupid git, just go for it!** but he reigned in his emotions and stood fast. He wanted to hurt Angelus and Drusilla…not the Slayer.

Buffy was confused. She could tell he wanted her by his obvious arousal, so why wouldn't he jump at what she was offering him? Was she *that* unattractive to him? So what if it turned out to be just sex. Maybe the feelings she thought she might be having weren't real. Then again, maybe they were.

Spike looked at her a moment before a slow smile crept over his lips. He could sense her sudden insecurity. The Slayer had no reason to doubt her appeal to him. She had him so hot and bothered, it was almost un-bearable.

Taking a step toward her, he had such a look of predatory hunger in his eyes that Buffy almost took a step back. It was frightening and thrilling at the same time.

Reaching around her, he scooped the tiny girl up into his arms and gently laid her on the bed.

A low, gutteral growl of rage could be heard outside the window, but neither vampire nor Slayer paid any attention to it. They were lost in each other now.

"Slow", Spike told her, laying on his side with her on her back. He
ran his hand lightly over her stomach as he softly spoke. "You're not
ready for what you're asking for".

Before Buffy could protest that she wasn't a child, Spike had captured
her lips again. It effectively shut her up, pushing all thoughts from
her mind other than him .

Pulling away slightly, Spike softly nipped her bottom lip before
kissing her again, teasing her with his tongue as she opened up for him
to deepen the kiss.

Angel, Drusilla, the whole mess was momentarily forgotten from both they're minds. All they cared about was what was happening here and now. And if it pissed Angel off in the process...well...good . Thats what they wanted.

They continued to explore each other, their bodies becoming one, melding into one another with all the pent-up fire and passion. Inhabitions ran free as the Slayer and vampire intimate again…and again…and again, until eventually they fell asleep in each others arms, each clutching the other like a life-line.

They did not know the tragedy about to be-fall them.

***********************************************************************
end part 3/4

Title: Allies or Love?
Author: Carla Laurelle
**************************
Part 4/4
***************************

4 HOURS LATER…..


Spike awoke to find the slayer nestled comfortably against him. They're
bodies melded together so perfectly that it was almost as if they were
made for each other.

The moonlight shone across her angelic face as he gently swept a piece
of golden hair away from her face. Buffy stirred in his arms, but did
not wake.

Spike smiled to himself. How had he suddenly gotten so lucky? One day
he was stuck in a wheelchair and had *Drusilla* as a rotten girlfriend, and the next he was up and walking with the Slayer as his....what was she anyway? He doubted one night of passion meant they were in a relationship. Things just didn't work that way. Either way, his life was always complicated wasn't it .

Who'd have thought? Spike had gone ahead and fallen for the slayer.
Unfortunately she seemed to have that effect on vampires. Damn Slayer. Damn, incredibly good-in-the-sack Slayer. This was going to be hell for his reputation. Oh well.

Only now could he see what Angel had seen in her when the wanker had a soul. Spike had taunted him endlessly about it, day and night, but now he understood.

Buffy certainly had a way to a man's heart.

Spike looked out the window into the night sky. It would be dawn soon,
and he couldn't stay here during the day. Or would a whole day with
Buffy be so bad?

No. He had to go. For now. He wasn't sure how Buffy would feel about
him when she woke up. He didn't want to be around if she regretted what
they'd done . There was no telling what she'd do then.

Silently, Spike gently moved Buffy out of his arms. She groaned and
rolled over on her side.

Getting up, he quickly dressed before he stood and looked back at her. He felt he needed to give her something. Something so that she would know that he cared, and what they'd done hadn't been a wham, bam, thank you maim.

Looking down, he fingered the gold ring he wore. It was the only thing
he had kept from his life as a human , mostly because he liked the way
it looked on him . He was a vampire, he couldn't help but be vain.
Despite the fact that vampires had no reflection, of course.

Removing the ring, Spike took Buffy's hand gently and placed it in her
palm . Closing her hand for her, he kissed the top of her head and
exited the room.

Outside, the night air was cool . The wind rustled some nearby leaves
as he stepped of her porch and lit a cigarette, completely satisfied in every way.

Suddenly, a figure darted from the trees and attacked. Spike jumped
back, but was caught by the on-rushing figure anyway. Throwing Spike
to the ground, the figure kicked him savagely in the face, sending him flying onto his back .

Spike looked up to see the furious face of Angelus.

"I told you to watch your step, Spike . In fact I didn't even know you
could *take* them. Now I'm just gonna have to kill you", Angel
threatened, his game face on.

"Try it, mate", Spike countered, swiftly getting to his feet.

Angel growled furiously. His rage was so deep, all he could see was red. He would not stop until he bathed in Spike's blood, and left his rotting corpse for his little whore to find.

Spike released a growl of his own, vamping his face as well.

They began to circle each other cautiously. Gauntlets had been thrown. The fight was on…to the death.

Angel attacked. Spike spun and tried to block, but Angel caught him in
the jaw with a solid right. Spike pivoted on his foot and back-handed
Angel. Taking advantage of Angel's distraction, Spike picked him up
and threw him against the tree. Angel fell to the ground, but
recovered quickly .

"I told you to stay away from her. She's mine", Angel growled.

"Well obviously she isn't anymore", Spike provoked Angel.

"Oh, she'll learn that she is alright . And she's gonna learn the hard
way. I promise".

Spike's face darkened. He knew what Angel did to the girls who didn't
cooperate with him . He had actually witnessed it many times over a
hundred years ago .

First he would kidnap them, hold them hostage in a room with no windows, and let them stay there for a few days allowing starvation, isolation, and dehydration weaken them. Then he would rape them over and over again until they submitted to him, most of the time it only took once for them to cry for mercy. Then he would torture them until they begged him to kill them. He either would, or turn them.

It was a set pattern that Angelus would always follow. Most of the time
the girls that fell victim to it hadn't even done anything to anger him. He was just bored, so he would go out and drag a pretty girl home to use as his toy. But Buffy was different. She was un-like any obsession Spike had ever seen Angel have. Her suffering would not end quickly.

And Spike would rather die than let Angel lay a finger on her.

"You won't touch her", Spike growled.

"Watch me", Angel countered. "That bitch is going to suffer an eternity of torment at my hands. I only wish you'd be around to see it."

Spike kicked out with his leg, but Angel caught it and twisted it
around, throwing Spike off balance. He fell to the ground.

"Live and learn, Spike my boy", Angel said, raising a stake above his
head, ready to plunge.

Before Angel could bring the stake down, it was kicked out of his hand
from behind. Angel turned in momentary surprise to see Buffy standing
defiantly behind him.

"My point exactly", She said to Angel with a look of disgust on her face.

Angel growled and reached for her, but she was too quick. She twirled
out of his reach and did a round-house kick, knocking him aside . While
Angel put himself together, Buffy reached down and quickly helped Spike
to his feet.

"Buffy...", Spike began, wanting to let her know how he felt, wanting to tell her to run!

"No time for that now", She said, anticipating Angel's attack . She
brought her knee up to meet Angel in the stomach as he threw himself at
her. Recovering more quickly than she thought, he back-handed her roughly, knocking her to the ground .

Spike growled and ran at Angel, Angel turned in time to see Spike kick
out and catch him in the upper jaw. Landing on the ground, Angel
rolled over and grabbed the stake from where it had fallen . Rolling
back over, the stake was knocked from his hand by Spike .

Grabbing Angel by the collar, Spike lifted him off the ground, high
above his head .

Angel laughed at him. "Just remember, she'll always love me. And it'll eat you alive that I got there first".

Spike savagely threw Angel against the tree. Bending down and picking up the stake , he stood over Angel with fire in his eye .

"Spike, NO!" , Buffy screamed . But it was too late.

Spike plunged the stake deep into Angel's heart. Angel didn't even scream, didn't even flinch. He simply looked over at Buffy, holding her gaze before finally disintagrating into dust.

Crying, Buffy ran to the place where Angel's ashes lay. Running her
hands over them, she scooped the ashes into a pile. "I'm sorry. I'm
so sorry", she babbled unintelligibly .

Spike felt grief rip through him. Grief for Buffy, and the pain he just caused her. "Buffy…" he began, not able to find the words.

Buffy turned towards Spike with rage.

"You promised!! You promised you wouldn't kill him! You promised you'd
wait till *I* was ready! You promised that I could do it!"

"I know", Spike said gently, looking down in shame. "I had to, luv. You have no idea what he would have done to you".

"Had to!! Had to!!" Buffy ranted. Her face grew red with unshed anger.

"I'm sorry", Spike said, knowing that 'sorry' wasn't gonna be nearly enough. He had just killed her first love. Sorry was never going to be enough.

Spike reached for her, but she shied away from his touch.

"Get away from me", Buffy said, jumping back . "I don't want to see
you". She turned her back to him and continued to cry, the tears coming undaunted.

Spike stepped back, hurt . He tried to reach to her again. His
fingertips grazed her shoulder as she flinched away from his touch.

"Get away from me", she said, her voice hard with anger and pain.

"How did you think this fight was going to end?" he asked her angrily ,
tired of being the one to blame.

Buffy turned back towards him.

"There were other ways!" she screamed . "We couldn've just ran back
into the house. He can't come in, remember? But no. You KILLED HIM
!" she threw herself at him , pounding against his chest. It was a
futile gesture , she was weakened with pain and grief to put much
strength behind the blows.

Spike tried to hug her to him, to comfort her, but she immediately pulled herself away again.

Spike looked away, unable to bear the look of fury in her eyes. When he turned his gaze back toward her, she was already walking back towards her house.

"Buffy, wait", he called after her.

"No! Go away", she replied.

She slammed the door shut behind her, leaving him standing alone in her
front yard.

"I'm sorry", he whispered, looking at the closed door.

He felt like the doorway to one of the best things that had ever
happened to him had just been slammed shut.

Sighing in frustration, he turned and stalked off into the night to
find someone to eat. Blood was going to run tonight.

************************************************************************

LATER, AT THE MANSION…………



"Spike!", Drusilla exclaimed, dragging her body from where she had been huddled on the floor. "My darling, you are well".

"Yeah baby. Daddy's back", Spike answered coldly.

"Spike, the air screams. So much death and sadness around me. The
voices say Angel's gone!", Drusilla whined.

"He is, luv", Spike said with no emotion .

"No", Drusilla cried, throwing herself to the floor once more.

"Dru...", Spike said moving toward her before crouching down in front of her prone body.

Drusilla looked up to see Spike take a stake out of his pocket. Her
eyes widened in fear and disbelief.

"Let's talk"

**********************************************************************

2 MONTHS LATER…


"Are you okay?" Willow asked Buffy .

For the past three weeks, since Angel's death, Buffy had done nothing
but mope and cry, and then mope some more. Finally she had agreed to
accompany Willow, Xander, and Cordelia to the Bronze, but the outing held little joy for her.

"Yeah Will. I'm feeling better", Buffy answered, her voice strained.
It was a total lie, but Buffy felt bad for letting her own problems
make her friends sad.

"Do you still miss him?" Willow asked unsurely .

"Yeah ", Buffy said slowly. "But it feels different now. I don't know how to explain it. I love him, I always will, but its not the full-blown passionate kind of love anymore. Does that make sense? Am I a bad person for thinking that?"

Willow shook her head. "No, Buffy, of course you're not a bad person". She hesitated before adding. "Maybe its because you found someone else you kind of…love?"

"What? No", Buffy said defensivley. A little *too* defensivley.

Willow gave her 'The Look'.

"Well, maybe", Buffy admitted glumly. "I don't know about 'love' yet, but I guess it could get there." She sighed and put her head in her hands. "God, Willow, what am I going to do. How can I possibly fall in love with a creature like him. He doesn't even have a soul."

"You mean Spike", Willow stated.

Buffy got a far away look. "I…can't forgive him".

Willow gave her a sympathetic look.

"I wasn't ready", Buffy continued.

"I know. But you need to move on, Buffy. Life doesn't stop when
somebody dies. You have to learn to pick yourself up, brush yourself
off, and go to the next problem. It's not easy when someone you love
dies. I mean, look at Giles. Sure, he moped , he probably cried,
but he's dealing. And sometime, he'll be ready to love again . Things
happen that you can't stop . You just have to adjust."

Buffy smiled at her friend. "Wow, Will. You have that whole 'wisdom'
thing down pat, don't you".

"And I even got you to smile" Willow said, congratulating herself.
Buffy laughed.

Willow glanced over Buffy's shoulder, and her smile faded.

"What?" Buffy asked.

"I, um....have to go to the ladies room", Willow said , hurrying away
from the table.

"Huh?", Buffy said, still confused as she watched the red-head scurry away from the table.

"Hello cutie", a voice behind her said. Buffy froze. "Mind if I sit
down?"

"Go ahead", Buffy said, frowning.

Spike sat across from her in the seat that Willow had abandoned.

"How have you been?", he asked softly.

"I'm dealing", Buffy answered, refusing to look at him .


Spike took a breath, and began his rehearsed speech in a rush. "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't realize what I was doing until I did it",
he said quickly, wanting to hurry up and apologize before she made some
excuse to leave. He had been trying to get her to talk to him since it
happened, but she repeatedly dodged his attempts. Or she told him to
fuck off, which only made him try harder.

Buffy stared at him silently, willing herself to not get sucked into his gorgeous blue eyes.

"I want your forgivness", Spike asked softly, suddenly unable to meet her gaze.

Buffy looked up into Spike's eyes. They were full of pain and regret.
Something Gile's had said not so long ago sprang into her mind. "Forgiveness is an act of compassion, Buffy. Its not done because a person deserves it, it's done because they *need* it".

Her face softened. But only for a second before she forced the
hardness back in her eyes. "I'm sorry...I..I can't do this", she said, wiping a tear from her eye as she hurridly stood from the table and
walked swiftly towards the exit.

After bursting through the door and into the fresh night air, Buffy took a deep breath, willing herself to calm down. She wanted to forgive Spike, she really did , but it was just too hard, too soon . Angel was her first love. He had been her whole world. And it almost destroyed her when he had reverted back into his evil form. And then Spike was there, like her knight in shining armor . He stole her heart almost as quickly as Angel did.

And that moment...that one moment as the stake was plunged into his
heart...it was almost as if the real Angel had returned for a split
second and looked her in the eyes before he turned into dust. It was almost like he was thanking her, for ending it. It hurt.

Buffy walked quickly, her head down in mourning.

"What do you *want* from me", a voice screamed at her from behind.

Buffy whirled around to see Spike walking towards her in frustration.

"I bloody well apologized like any other pansy-ass would, what else do
you want from me", he demanded angrily . He was tired of her dodging his attempts to talk to him . They were going to put closure on this thing *tonight*, whether she liked it or not.

"I want Angel back", Buffy yelled.

"Do you", he said, softer this time. "Do you really? Is that what you
really want?"

Buffy looked at him as confusion began to seep into her brain. Was that
what she really wanted? Did she even love Angel like that anymore? Or
was she just so guilty over what she had done? If it wasn't for her
pushing him when he told her no that fateful night on her birthday,
none of this would be happening .

"I don't know anymore", she mumbled, her throat beginning to tighten,
signaling the fact that she was about to start crying.

Spike sighed and pulled her into his arms. For the first time in two months, Buffy let herself have the contact with him. She threw her arms
around his waist, hugging him like he was the last solid object in the whole messed up world to cling to.

"Search your heart, Buffy", Spike told her softly, using her real
name to show her that he meant it.

Buffy pulled away from him just enough to be able to look up at his face. His beautiful , statue-like face with his snow-white skin and his
crystal blue eyes that shone under the moonlight like the color of the
sky. And the answer was clear as day, when before it had been shrouded in the murky depths of her grief.

"My heart is with you", she whispered.

"That's what I'd hoped you'd say", Spike smiled. Wrapping his arm around her shoulder, he began to walk with her at his side . "And if you didn't say that...well...then Sunnyhell was in for a bloodbath because I would have been mighty peeved".

Buffy smiled, her first real smile in months. "Someone here needs to learn some anger management".

Spike pretended to be insulted. "Anger management? My anger management
is just fine. Slit a few throats, rip off a few heads, when I'm in an
especially bad mood I sometimes like to pull off they're..."

"I get the picture", Buffy interrupted him. "A very vivid and disturbing picture, but I get it.

"You know me", Spike smiled .

"No , I don't", Buffy answered honestly, glancing at him again. "But I'm looking to find out".


***********************************************************************
EPILOGUE

Spike lounged in his favorite chair in their apartment, throwing his hands behind his head as he sighed happily. Un-life was great.

Suddenly, Buffy came around the corner giggling and jumped onto his lap, causing the chair to tip precariously before falling back with a crash, and taking them with it.

Spike laughed and tickled her for a bit before asking. "How was class today, luv?"

Buffy groaned and repositioned herself until she straddled him while he was still pinned to the over-turned chair. "Awful. I hate my stupid psych teacher. She is so boring".

"Want me to eat her, pet?"

"No", Buffy shrugged, as if it was no big thing. "You can give her a good scare though".

Spike smiled at the love of his life. They had been together for 4 years, 176 days, and… he glanced at the clock, 12 hours and 7 minutes.
They had been living together for the past two years, after he received a very long lecture from Joyce, of course, about taking good care of her baby girl. Buffy now attended college, but was currently undecided on a major.

Spike suddenly became all too aware that Buffy was slowly grinding her hips against his, eliciting a low, predatory growl. "Now, now, pet. Its not very nice to tease".

Buffy smiled down at him. "Who said I was teasing?"

Spike pulled her down and claimed her lips in a searing kiss. He was never going to let her go.

Life was grand.

*********************
THE END